FaithManor Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 So, about an hour ago, I was in the shower having given the dog a bath and in need of de-doggifying my body. I had taken a pair of jeans, undes, and shirt into the bathroom with me but no bra. "Knock, knock, knock" at the door. Of course the 12 year old notes that the "knocker" is a 4-H member and his dad so he lets him in...they are here for rocket parts and DH was gone. UGH! It is obvious from what little I can hear while in the shower, that though I am clearly unavailable (ds having announced loudly, "She's in the shower. I don't know when she'll be done!", they were not going to leave. So, I finish quickly and to my horror note that I do not have a bra in the bathroom. I have no escape from the main bathroom to my bedroom without going past said man and his son. ARGH! Now, I am not a buxomy woman, but on the other hand I'm not flat like the plain states either so I was in a real bind. I ended up putting on the my clean shirt and then my dog hair encrusted, half soaked sweatshirt over that in the hopes that multiple layers and hunching shoulders while rummaging through 4-H boxes for parts I didn't know they needed would disguise my lack of undergarment. Grrr....then and then...the dumb man would just not take a hint and leave. Wanted to talk politics, school funding, gas prices, and his kid kept begging to stay and play with my kids even though I said no more than once and indicated that I really needed to get supper finished, you know...my dripping wet, uncombed hair not being a clue to him to leave. Seriously, is it just me or when the man was told I was in the shower and that my husband was not home, should he have at the age of approximately 38, known that it was not appropriate to stick around much less want to chat? What 4-H parent just randomly stops by the leader's hosue without calling first? Okay, I shall know return to happy programming. Barbecue chicken smells are wafting from the kitchen and it looks like dh might actually not work this evening so I need to get into a good mood quickly! Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cin Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 I had a similar incident last week. I had forgotten a friend was stopping by to pick up some stuff. I had just popped out of the shower, and was half dressed when I realized that all my bras were hanging in the basement. I bounded out of our bedroom and started down the stairs when I saw a pair of shoes that I din't recognize. I ran back upstairs. Fortunately, she didn't see me! But she ALMOST got a flash! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Ugh! I've been there with people at the door! Like my crossed arms over my chest and my uncomfortable, but very clear, hints weren't enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 For me it is the Schwan's man. :glare: I've got dd now ignoring the knock. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissel Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 Now, I am not a buxomy woman, but on the other hand I'm not flat like the plain states either... :svengo::lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 I agree...totally rude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oakblossoms Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 I would have told him I wasn't finished dressing and handed him the box of stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newlifemom Posted June 29, 2011 Share Posted June 29, 2011 I tell you that my dh would not have gone into a house when the husband was not around. He would have waited on the porch and then left immediately. He doesn't even like to have business lunches when it is one on one and the other person is female. I appreciate it. I haven't forced him, but I recognize that he is doing everything in his power to remain above reproach. Unfortunately, some men are clueless. :D Sorry for you experience, but thanks for the :lol:. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 My children are not allowed to answer the door unless they look through the peep-hole and recognize the person as someone they want to talk to. They do not ever let anyone other than their friends in the house. I would have said, "Sorry, this is not a convient time. Perhaps you could call my hubby and arrange a better time?' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Ugh! I've been there with people at the door! Like my crossed arms over my chest and my uncomfortable, but very clear, hints weren't enough. :lol: I just let those puppies do what they will in the shirt. THAT gets rid of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whereneverever Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 My children are not allowed to answer the door unless they look through the peep-hole and recognize the person as someone they want to talk to. They do not ever let anyone other than their friends in the house. I would have said, "Sorry, this is not a convient time. Perhaps you could call my hubby and arrange a better time?' :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 He is an idiot. Talk to your kiddo about letting people in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hockey Mom Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 My children aren't allowed to answer the door, period. Additionally, if I'm not expecting you, I won't answer your knocking either. I instituted this for a couple of reasons: 1. Random strangers knock on my door asking to pick the mangos from my tree. I made a sign that reads, "The mangos are private property and NOT FOR SALE." So far, it's worked. 2. My Mastiff, while loving and sweet, WILL try to take you down if he doesn't know you and I'm not there to assure him you aren't a bad guy. He's especially protective of my boys. 3. People (read: relatives and friends), seem to think that because you homeschool, that means you are available to babysit/chit chat/receive their mail, etc. at the drop of a hat. I am not available unless you call ahead and schedule it with me. I realize that sounds a bit harsh, but clear boundaries were necessary for my own preservation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
black_midori Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Sounds like you and your kids knew the guy and were on friendly terms with him, so I wouldn't have been surprised about the kids letting him in... For the other, I'd have either excused myself to go finish getting dressed, started actually making supper, or just said "sorry, can't talk, let me help you out the door". If you feel strongly about something, you have to make it brutally, painfully clear - not rudely so, but I know plenty of people who wouldn't get the more subtle hints. FTR, I'm not above just leaving someone standing in the main hall while I go finish what I feel like finishing... if it is not dressing, they are welcome to follow me around like a lost puppy... :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Sounds like you and your kids knew the guy and were on friendly terms with him, so I wouldn't have been surprised about the kids letting him in... For the other, I'd have either excused myself to go finish getting dressed, started actually making supper, or just said "sorry, can't talk, let me help you out the door". If you feel strongly about something, you have to make it brutally, painfully clear - not rudely so, but I know plenty of people who wouldn't get the more subtle hints. FTR, I'm not above just leaving someone standing in the main hall while I go finish what I feel like finishing... if it is not dressing, they are welcome to follow me around like a lost puppy... :) :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GWOB Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 :lol: I just let those puppies do what they will in the shirt. THAT gets rid of them. :lol: I AM a buxom lady. If the ladies injure you because you are too clueless to leave, that is your problem. I am not responsible for damage cause by m'ladies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeanne in MN Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 My boys had a friend over the other day and when someone knocked at the door (I was upstairs) the friend went and answered the door! I also had a kid answer our phone for us when he was here once too. What's up with that??? Anyhow, sorry for your inconvenience. That's not fun. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 My boys had a friend over the other day and when someone knocked at the door (I was upstairs) the friend went and answered the door! I also had a kid answer our phone for us when he was here once too. What's up with that??? Anyhow, sorry for your inconvenience. That's not fun. :( I had this happen too! (Only I was sitting right there - in shock!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine A. Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Sounds like you and your kids knew the guy and were on friendly terms with him, so I wouldn't have been surprised about the kids letting him in... For the other, I'd have either excused myself to go finish getting dressed, started actually making supper, or just said "sorry, can't talk, let me help you out the door". If you feel strongly about something, you have to make it brutally, painfully clear - not rudely so, but I know plenty of people who wouldn't get the more subtle hints. FTR, I'm not above just leaving someone standing in the main hall while I go finish what I feel like finishing... if it is not dressing, they are welcome to follow me around like a lost puppy... :) :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 He is an idiot. Talk to your kiddo about letting people in. :iagree: Also, that sort of thing would be bound to happen to me if I showered at any other time than very early in the morning, before the birds are even awake. I hate getting up so early, but nowhere near as much as I hate the interruptions to my shower by such unforseeable, ridiculous situations. You've given me a good giggle though, thank you :001_smile:. Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippen Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I keep my bras and underwear in the bathroom--have for years since I read it made more sense to store the underwear in the bathroom and the sheets in the bedroom. Now I know it's just in case someone drops by for rocket parts while I'm in the shower.;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Once , many years ago, when my oldest child was just a baby a few weeks old. I went to have a shower, and because I was a new mother,and I was worried about not hearing him while I was in the shower, I left the bathroom door open. Well would you believe it that the local doctor walked into the house and came marching right into the bathroom. I tell you we were both completely speechless for a few moments and both of us just stared at each other in complete shock. Turned out he was after the house across the road. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dad 4 Boys Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 He is an idiot. Talk to your kiddo about letting people in. Really, someone that they obviously knew from somewhere, hanging around to talk at inopportune time is an idiot for doing so? I think I also remember rude and clueless being mentioned as well. Maybe his house is configured such that someone taking a shower could move from the shower to their bedroom without being exposed to the rest of the house, and the present situation just didn't jump out at him. My house is set up that way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Really, someone that they obviously knew from somewhere, hanging around to talk at inopportune time is an idiot for doing so? I think I also remember rude and clueless being mentioned as well. Maybe his house is configured such that someone taking a shower could move from the shower to their bedroom without being exposed to the rest of the house, and the present situation just didn't jump out at him. My house is set up that way. Nothing to do with how the bathroom/bedroom layout was set-up, but everything to do with not noticing that someone was uncomfortable, was in the middle of doing something else and was hinting heavily that they didn't want to engage in idle chit-chat at that time. Thick skinned, thick. Idiot. Dare I say it, 'a man'. Yours respectfully Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nono Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 :lol: I just let those puppies do what they will in the shirt. THAT gets rid of them. Exactly! I'm tired of having to hunch. And, if it doesn't get him to beat a hasty retreat, you now have intel on what type of person he really is.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dad 4 Boys Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Nothing to do with how the bathroom/bedroom layout was set-up, but everything to do with not noticing that someone was uncomfortable, was in the middle of doing something else and was hinting heavily that they didn't want to engage in idle chit-chat at that time. Thick skinned, thick. Idiot. Dare I say it, 'a man'. Yours respectfully Cassy So you're saying that being a man is synonymous with being an idiot? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassy Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 So you're saying that being a man is synonymous with being an idiot? Well, no. At least not always. Being a man does, however, often mean lacking sensitivity to those subtle, and not so subtle, verbal and non-verbal social cues. Certainly the man in my life often gets so carried away with ideas he's enjoying lecturing me about, I mean discussing with me, that I often have to walk away, leaving him in full flow, having told him at least 6 times that I really must go now or his dinner will burn :D. Don't take it personally :001_smile:. Cassy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted June 30, 2011 Author Share Posted June 30, 2011 I keep my bras and underwear in the bathroom--have for years since I read it made more sense to store the underwear in the bathroom and the sheets in the bedroom. Now I know it's just in case someone drops by for rocket parts while I'm in the shower.;) Good idea! I'll start keeping spares in one of the drawers. The thing is that I don't have a problem with my boys (14, 12, and 11) now answering the door most of the time when I'm home. They are old enough to do so and make good judgments. It's just that currently we are remodeling at the front of the house (well, actually we have the foyer roped off and a sign on the front door to come around to the back because we had a roof leak issue - roofing crew is a week late, grrrrr) and the back door is our kitchen entrance and it has a glass window in the door - leftover from the renovation job and I am now regretting that we didn't replace it. So, though ds really didn't want to let the guy in while I was in the shower, the man could see ds clearly standing at the sink washing dishes and kept motioning for ds to open the door. This he's a 4-H dad, ds was nervous about offending him. We have a problem with this family in 4-H. They are very socially naive. And when I had to exit the bathroom as this guy really was not going to leave, even if I had been shouting through the bathroom door that I was unavailable, I didn't have a choice. Literally, these people are so clueless as to appropriate behavior that he would have started rifling through boxes or helped himself to our basement looking for the rocketry supplies. Now,for most people it would be because they are deliberately rude. But, these people, it is because they are totally socially inept. I have given up ever calling their home if I have information for them about 4-H events because as soon as the mom hears my voice she starts chattering at top speed (think Hammy the squirrel from Over the Hedge) and doesn't stop. I'm not even certain when she breathes in there and then all of a sudden she'll say, "Well, it's been good talking to you. I have to go. Bye." and hang up! The only thing I ever got to say was , "Hi, this is Faith and I'm calling about 4-H." That's it. She interrupts, takes off on all kinds of tangents that have nothing to do with me, and then boom...end of conversation. She never bothers to find out why I called in the first place. So, I gave up calling them about anything and pay for USPS to deliver a letter. Short of getting really angry, I don't think I could have escaped and unfortunately, because they are 4-H people and dh is the science superintendent for our county, he and I have to be careful how we handle "sticky wickets", as my mother calls them. Ugh. But, thanks for the advice. If the roofers don't get here soon so we can go back to using the solid front door entrance and choose NOT to answer the knock, I'm going to make a curtain for the window in that door so know one can see into the kitchen. We aren't the only ones that have issues with this family's lack of social skills. The dad and the son have so completely bombarded the director's office with emails and phone calls, that she will no longer allow her assistant to patch through more than one call per week from them and has their emails going directly to her junk mail folder. They are a seriously attention demanding family. Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nono Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Faith, given the info you just posted, why did you even bother putting on any shirt? :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Birdwinglips Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 For me I keep borrowing my 5 yo's hair clips to hold back my bangs. Needless to say, it's always when I am wearing a curly, multi-colored clip when a neighbor or what not drops by. And it takes me at least a few minutes before I remember, chatting away with my clip in. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweetMissMagnolia Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 ugh yes he should have left when he heard you were unavailable and your dh wasn't home.....that was rude in my opinion......((HUGS)) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted June 30, 2011 Author Share Posted June 30, 2011 Faith, given the info you just posted, why did you even bother putting on any shirt? :lol: :lol::lol::biggrinjester: Hey, I may have nursed some kids in my day but my "booKs" are still pretty nice. I don't need some 4-H dude and his 12 year old son doing this :001_tt1: at me! :D Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nono Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 :lol::lol::biggrinjester: Hey, I may have nursed some kids in my day but my "booKs" are still pretty nice. I don't need some 4-H dude and his 12 year old son doing this :001_tt1: at me! :D Faith :tongue_smilie:It would have been quite the experiment to see if they would have had that normal reaction, or, if even under extreme circumstances, the chatting continued. I'm ROFL at all the possible reactions: theirs, yours, and your kids!!! THANKS for the morning pick-me-up amid all my drudgery here. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 :iagree:He should have when he heard you were in the shower. Imo...His staying was beyond rude, he should have waited out in the car if he couldn't make a second trip. He is an idiot. Talk to your kiddo about letting people in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peela Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I find it old fashioned but kinda sweet, the way you guys are around expecting men to be more considerate and have better manners. It reminds me of 1950s values I see in movies, but it's not really the world I live in nowadays. As long as you have a layer, thats good enough. For me, I have opened the door to the mailman delivering a package many times in my dressing gown, thrown on hastily over not much. I would be self conscious in a top with no bra in summer but I would just cross my arms over my chest, most likely, and carry on a conversation. Or, what the heck, not bother crossing my arms. Their problem (though I really dont like the eyes looking at my chest instead of my eyes nowadays. One of the kids Scout leaders used to do that- ugh, does he think I dont notice? ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaTanya Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 We made a rule. Kids are not allowed to answer the door. We have relatives (yes, more than one) who would drop by unexpectedly right during the babies'/children's nap times and often I was trying to get some much needed rest. AND, besides waking me, they would wander down the hall to say "Hi" to the baby or just to "see if he's awake." OY! Or sometimes we were working on some project and they wouldn't get the hint that they were interrupting something important. Or sometimes dh and I were "busy." :D So. That's the rule. If I want to greet visitors, it is my choice. It took me many years to get over the guilt of not dropping MY stuff to accommodate our acquaintances who had no schedule or children or responsibility, but there it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Once , many years ago, when my oldest child was just a baby a few weeks old. I went to have a shower, and because I was a new mother,and I was worried about not hearing him while I was in the shower, I left the bathroom door open. Well would you believe it that the local doctor walked into the house and came marching right into the bathroom. I tell you we were both completely speechless for a few moments and both of us just stared at each other in complete shock. Turned out he was after the house across the road. Oh my! That would have had me screaming bloody murder for sure!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorphins Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Once , many years ago, when my oldest child was just a baby a few weeks old. I went to have a shower, and because I was a new mother,and I was worried about not hearing him while I was in the shower, I left the bathroom door open. Well would you believe it that the local doctor walked into the house and came marching right into the bathroom. I tell you we were both completely speechless for a few moments and both of us just stared at each other in complete shock. Turned out he was after the house across the road. That's hysterical. Well, at least I hope it is for you in hind sight (excuse the pun). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorphins Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I tell you that my dh would not have gone into a house when the husband was not around. He would have waited on the porch and then left immediately. He doesn't even like to have business lunches when it is one on one and the other person is female. I appreciate it. I haven't forced him, but I recognize that he is doing everything in his power to remain above reproach. Unfortunately, some men are clueless. :D Sorry for you experience, but thanks for the :lol:. My DH is the same way and I totally appreciate it, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kristinannie Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 This reminds me of the most embarassing moment of my life. We used to live in a VERY secluded house. One day, DH and I were going to go hiking and we were all ready, but then we did some work outside and got really sweaty so I wanted to change my underwear and shorts before we left. I had some extra in the car (we had just gotten home from a trip) so I just changed in our driveway. At that exact moment, the UPS guy drove down our driveway and saw EVERYTHING. I wanted to die. It was the ONLY time I had ever changed clothes outside. Gotta love timing sometimes. To the OP, that guy definitely should have left if you were in the shower and definitely shouldn't have hung around for so long. I really wish there was a polite way to ask people to leave when they have overstayed their welcome. In the south, they used to put a pineapple on your bed when it was time to leave. Maybe I will try and get that tradition restarted! :auto: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Oh my! That would have had me screaming bloody murder for sure!! You know, both the doctor and I were so shocked that we both really didn't say much at all. he mumbles something about the wrong address and I said across the road. he took off at top speed and I got the hysterics. I didn't go to that doctor for a few years after though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Joining in again too late, but yes, any man who walks into a house where the woman is showering and the husband is not home is an idiot. And a dumbass. And potentially on the way to the ER. You don't do that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Joining in again too late, but yes, any man who walks into a house where the woman is showering and the husband is not home is an idiot. And a dumbass. And potentially on the way to the ER. You don't do that. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted July 1, 2011 Author Share Posted July 1, 2011 Thanks everyone! It's good to know that I was sensibly frustrated and not being over-sensitive. Our poor 12 year old told me, "Mom, I told him three times that dad was gone and you were unavailable. But, since he was a 4-H parent, I was afraid he'd complain to the 4-H director about me not letting him come in." So, I have since explained to ds that he does not need to worry about our extension office getting angry with him for not allowing someone in the house who has no business being there. Just because we are 4-H leaders, that doesn't mean everyone in the club has equal access to our private abode! I'm sewing a curtain for the back door so know one can see in while we wait to use the front door again. Eventually, when we finally get the roof done and save for another used vehicle (I think my Ford Taurus maybe ready to retire at nearly 200,000 miles and many little things going wrong), then I'll get a new back door that will not include the ability to see into my kitchen and dining room. Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terabith Posted July 4, 2011 Share Posted July 4, 2011 I'm just shocked that doctor was doing a house call! But wow, talk about mortification and uncomfortable situation! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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