Do you eat dinner with your children?

[mom2denj]

We make it a point to eat together just about every night!!

[justamouse]

7 nights a week.

[2squared]

We eat three meals a day together. One meal is at the dining table, and the other two are at the kitchen island.

 

I do prepare all three meals.

[Carrie12345]

Aren't most of us home with them all day? ;)

 

:lol:

Well, I meant in comparison to the people the op's area signs were aimed toward.

I do not go around posting signs to remind parents to do recitation and narration on a regular basis. :tongue_smilie:

[MBM]

How often do you sit down to dinner together?

 

Almost every night except when dh and I go out alone or my son is at a friend's house for dinner.

[jenL]

We eat dinner together every night except when dh has to work late which is usually only within the first 5 business days of each month (even then it may only end up being 1 night/month). It may not be an elaborate dinner if we have church meetings or a sports practice, but that is not the point. It is very important to us to come together at the end of the day.

Edited April 12, 2011 by jenL

[littleWMN]

It's important to me that we eat dinner as a family together. I grew up that way. DH grew up heavily involved in sports so it wasn't as important in their family. Basically I aim for dinner together every night but DH isn't very reliable at coming home at a predictable time so that makes it harder. We eat without him often but that gets hard too because the kids want to wait on him and there is only so much waiting you can do. It's been a sore spot at times. I'd love ideas on how to make it go smoother.

[kbed0849]

I am laughing as I read this! Right before I read this my son stated, " Do we have to have family dinner tonight? We do that too much. I just want to eat a hotdog". He said this because he saw me bring home ice cream from the store. It must be calling his name! Anyway... yes, we do eat dinner as a family as much as possible! I can say most families we know have too many activities to be home at meal times.

[dirty ethel rackham]

We usually eat dinner together. There may be times when my teens' schedules make it difficult, but we usually manage it at least 5 days a week. If hubby works late, however, that throws the schedule a bit and I save a plate for him.

[NanceXToo]

Almost always, although once in a while I do feed the kids an early dinner and eat separately with my husband or on my own later at night.

[prairiewindmomma]

My kids and I eat together for breakfast, lunch, and supper. My dh is able to join us for supper about 1/2 of the time. The rest of the time, he runs late (past 7 pm), and the kids are hungry and tired so we give up and eat without him.

[In the Rain]

Nearly always.

[Abigail4476]

My town is promoting that this week you should eat dinner as a family.

 

They have signs up about it, its in the local paper and huge banners hanging downtown.

 

My daughter thinks the whole thing is very weird being we eat dinner together 7 nights/week (plus lunch and breakfast).

 

I told her they are trying to get parents more involved in their children's lives and just have the whole family sit and actually talk to each other (as opposed to be passing on the way from one activity to another).

 

How often do you sit down to dinner together?

 

At least every week day. I make a big deal out of it most of the time, using a table cloth, candles and my husband turns on a Pandora channel with nice music. I think it's important. It's a very pleasant part of our day. :001_smile:

[PinkInTheBlue]

Pretty much every meal except the occasional date we have. We don't really have activities very much so that doesn't come up either. On really casual nights we might have a "fend for yourself" and Tony and I carry our sandwich or whatever to watch something in our room with however wants to join us.

[The Girls' Mom]

We almost always eat togethet at the table, but a lot of our friends families hardly ever do.

[whitestavern]

We eat as a family almost every day, all three meals, due to homeschooling and dh working from home. Now that softball/baseball/golf season is here, there will be one or two nights a week where we might not be eating as a family, but this will only be for a month or two.

[WiseOwlKnits]

We eat together every night.

 

:iagree:

 

Us too.

[rwjx2khsmj]

The family members (and their friends) that are here sit down to eat three meals a day, at least six days a week. We might miss a lunch or dinner at home once a week, maybe. Not all family members are here for every meal but those that are eat together.

[Peela]

I am making a point of it at least 3-4 nights a week. Now that the kids are away all day, and have some evening activities, its all too easy to have staggered dinners, or eat in front of the computer or TV, because by the end of the day we all just want to catch up on our email! So when we are all here, we eat together and I make a point of it.

[JaniceO]

I eat dinner with my children pretty much every night. DH, on the other hand, works until 8 or 9 pm almost every night, so he misses dinner with us.

[jewellsmommy]

Pretty much, but Wed. night at church is the exception. I help cook so the kids and dh sit out in the dining hall and eat while I am serving or cleaning in the kitchen.

 

Dh comes home for lunch 95% of the time. Breakfast is more individual though.

[homeschooltoone]

We eat together every night.

[Koerarmoca]

Up until we moved last week we did. Our table broke as we where trying to move it out of the old house. My aunt gave us a replacement table but only seats 4 (barley) I stand at the bar in the kitchen for breakfast/lunch. For dinner I sit with dh in the living room but we all remain in conversation with each other. Hopefully we will be able to replace the table in the next few months.

[elise1mds]

Almost always, although once in a while I do feed the kids an early dinner and eat separately with my husband or on my own later at night.

 

We do that, too. I sometimes make a point to sit down with the kids for a little while when they're eating, even if I'm not eating with them, but I can't usually make myself sit still for more than a couple of minutes. Sometimes we also move the desks in front of the TV and all share a movie while eating, though I guess that's still technically eating together even if we're not actually sharing stories or attempting to teach someone that it is NOT, in fact, good manners to try to stick grape tomatoes up your nose.

[texasmama]

No, and I feel terribly guilty about it. It has been one of my resolutions to have us eat dinner together regularly as a family, but I just can't seem to do it.

 

For one, I am not usually hungry for dinner. I eat a light breakfast and a big lunch and then just nibble a little for dinner. If I sit down for a meal, I will definitely eat more and I am reluctant to do that because I'd have to eat less at lunch (when I'm starving) or I'd gain weight.

 

For two, I do read to the kids for an hour at breakfast and sometimes at lunch. I spend every second of my day doing something for or with one of them until around 1:30 and then I'm running them to lessons somewhere or a playdate. By the time I have finished preparing dinner, I desperately want to be alone!

 

Yay for Lisa! I was starting to feel like the only homeschooling mom loser who doesn't eat dinner with her kids!:lol: This is much my situation. I sit with them while they eat lunch and usually do read alouds. Dh has a weird schedule and weird eating habits so he doesn't usually eat dinner with us. I am not often hungry when the kids are. But I do spend most of my waking hours with them so maybe I can let go of a bit of the guilt. Also, dh owns a business and offices at home so we have a LOT of togetherness, even if it doesn't involve meals. I hope that will suffice.:tongue_smilie:

Edited April 13, 2011 by texasmama

[ecj98]

We eat together 5-6 nights a week.

[cajunrose]

We never eat as a family. Actually...we eat in 3 separate rooms. I am a little sad about that, but honestly, I'm with my family (including my husband) 24/7. We spend a LOT of time together so I just had to let this one go. We WOULD eat as a family if I pushed it, but it's me that has the hang up..not either of them. The problem you ask? I have a severe aversion to hearing and seeing people eat. I can't even stand to be in the same room with somebody eating. I have always been this way..even as a child. It has gotten worse as I have gotten older. I nitpick to death. "Raelee stop brushing your teeth on that fork." "Todd, can you possibly close your mouth when you eat?" My husband just won't stand for it...and rightly so. I get near the point of vomiting when I am in the same room when they eat. I wish I were different, but I'm not. :(

[Heather in Neverland]

Yes we do.

[Geo]

yep. every night.

 

Geo

[Serenade]

We eat dinner together every night. It is very important to me.

 

ETA: We don't eat breakfast together and lunch is 50-50.

Edited April 13, 2011 by Serenade

[Jenny in Florida]

All of you folks who have said you eat dinner together every night:

 

1. How old are your children?

2. Are they involved in outside activities?

 

Thanks!

[Desert Rat]

We eat dinner as a family almost always. My dh has been working late since he got back to work so he misses a few.

[Lady Florida.]

I haven't read all the responses, but yes we do. Almost every night. Sometimes if dh is working late, ds and I will eat at different times, but when the 3 of us are here, we eat dinner together.

 

I know a lot of people make a point to eat together when kids are young, then when they get older, dinner together slacks off. IME, the teen years are just as important, if not more important, for family meal times. If dh worked a different shift I'd see to it that we ate breakfast or lunch together.

 

Ds doesn't have outside evening activities, but until about 6 months ago, he had been taking martial arts for 6 years. On nights when he had class (3x a week), I worked our dinner around the class so that we still ate together.

[Jenny in Florida]

Ds doesn't have outside evening activities, but until about 6 months ago, he had been taking martial arts for 6 years. On nights when he had class (3x a week), I worked our dinner around the class so that we still ate together.

 

Again, I'm curious. How late did those classes run? And did your husband just wait until 8:00 or whatever to eat with you guys?

 

I've tried shifting dinner later so that we can eat together after our son's classes and rehearsals, but everyone hated it. My husband was hungry at a regular dinner time and hated having me busy cleaning up until 9:00. My son still needed to eat before he left for class and then wasn't interested in real food by the time he got home. And, since he still had to eat before we left, anyway, I ended up either making or at least cleaning up after an extra meal, which he was usually eating while I was busy trying to prep for our after-class dinner.

 

I guess if it was one night a week, that would be one thing. But it's usually three or four nights a week for us. And that is during "normal" times, when our son isn't also rehearsing a community theatre show. Most of those rehearse evenings from 7:00 - 10:00. So, I have to run him from whatever usual class he has directly to the rehearsal, meaning we're out from 3:00 or 4:00 straight through until 10:00 or 11:00. My husband works regular office hours and gets home between 5:30 and 6:00 most days. There is often no overlap.

 

Recently, one of the dance classes shifted earlier by an hour, meaning it is now possible for us to eat dinner together one additional night per week. But he is also in the last couple of weeks of rehearsal for an opera, and they will have a full week of rehearsals every evening from 6:00 - 9:00 or 6:00 - 11:00. Then there's show weekend, then a week with two evening show choir performances, then tech week for another show. Sometime after my daughter's graduation in late May, the schedule lightens a little bit.

 

Then, rehearsals for the summer shows will start in early June.

 

So, I guess I just don't understand how people do this? If one parent works relatively normal office hours and has any commute at all and even one child is fairly involved in outside activities, when do you all eat?

[mom31257]

We eat together almost every night. I usually don't cook on Sundays (cereal for breakfast, eat out lunch, and everybody snacks on their own the rest of the day). Occasionally we won't be together, but we usually eat together Monday-Saturday.

[RahRah]

We have dinner together every night except when DH is out of town, which is extremely rare, like one or two nights a year since we usually travel with DH, or when DH and I go out to dinner sans kids, which is about six times a year, if we're lucky!

 

So far as breakfast - DH is on his own....he wakes and is out the door, between 5:30-6:00 AM, well before we wake up. I'm not a breakfast person, but will make and then sit with DS as he has his breakfast....lunch we have together without DH since he's at work.

 

All of you folks who have said you eat dinner together every night:

 

1. How old are your children?

2. Are they involved in outside activities?

 

Thanks!

 

1. DS is 6, DS-baby is 12-weeks now.

 

2. DS6 is involved with outside activities - swim lessons, cub scouts, edu program at local museum.

 

DH typically doesn't get home until around 6:45-7:15 at night (rarely earlier, sometimes later) and since we HS, we don't have any real pressure to have DS6 go to bed by say 7:30 or 8:00, so we normally have dinner around 7:30 each night, +/- 30 minutes....which fits in nicely with DS's outside activities. On nights where an activity brings us home close to or after DH, we'll either have a crock-pot dinner night (den meetings) or DH will cook dinner (pack meeting night) or we'll do leftovers or meal that was prepared and frozen, just heat and eat type dinner....that's only once a month though.

Edited April 13, 2011 by RahRah

[Lady Florida.]

Again, I'm curious. How late did those classes run? And did your husband just wait until 8:00 or whatever to eat with you guys?

 

 

 

My husband works what would be considered regular hours. He technically gets off at 4, but doesn't always leave on time. For the most part he's home by 5.

 

What drove me crazy about martial arts class is that they were on different times depending on which day you went. They were one hour classes that were either 4-5, 5-6, 6-7, or 7-8. On the nights ds went to a 4-5 or 5-6 class, we ate late. On a 6-7 or 7-8 night, we ate early.

 

On the nights we'd eat late, ds and I would have a late lunch, and dh would have a light snack when he got home. Yes, he was willing to wait if it meant eating with his family.

 

Was it inconvenient. Yes, I won't deny that. Did I get frustrated and tired of it at times? Of course. It was a relief when ds decided to give up martial arts, because I was glad not to have to work around it anymore. But it was worth it *to us* to work around it. Other families might feel it's not worth it; that it's too stressful.

[MorganClassicalPrep]

Well, this semester DD and I actually only eat dinner together 3 nights a week. I have class until 615 (MW) or 715 (TTh), so she has dinner at the babysitters. But we normally have dinner together, the schedule this semester is just wonky.

[Pixie]

Again, I'm curious. How late did those classes run? And did your husband just wait until 8:00 or whatever to eat with you guys?

 

I've tried shifting dinner later so that we can eat together after our son's classes and rehearsals, but everyone hated it. My husband was hungry at a regular dinner time and hated having me busy cleaning up until 9:00. My son still needed to eat before he left for class and then wasn't interested in real food by the time he got home. And, since he still had to eat before we left, anyway, I ended up either making or at least cleaning up after an extra meal, which he was usually eating while I was busy trying to prep for our after-class dinner.

 

I guess if it was one night a week, that would be one thing. But it's usually three or four nights a week for us. And that is during "normal" times, when our son isn't also rehearsing a community theatre show. Most of those rehearse evenings from 7:00 - 10:00. So, I have to run him from whatever usual class he has directly to the rehearsal, meaning we're out from 3:00 or 4:00 straight through until 10:00 or 11:00. My husband works regular office hours and gets home between 5:30 and 6:00 most days. There is often no overlap.

 

Recently, one of the dance classes shifted earlier by an hour, meaning it is now possible for us to eat dinner together one additional night per week. But he is also in the last couple of weeks of rehearsal for an opera, and they will have a full week of rehearsals every evening from 6:00 - 9:00 or 6:00 - 11:00. Then there's show weekend, then a week with two evening show choir performances, then tech week for another show. Sometime after my daughter's graduation in late May, the schedule lightens a little bit.

 

Then, rehearsals for the summer shows will start in early June.

 

So, I guess I just don't understand how people do this? If one parent works relatively normal office hours and has any commute at all and even one child is fairly involved in outside activities, when do you all eat?

 

We do eat late. Right now both girls have rehearsal from 4-8pm every day so we eat after they get home. Next week, rehersals will be till 9-9:30pm so they will pack dinner and dh and I will eat alone at home.

However "normal" dinner time at our house is rarely before 7:30pm so eating at 8 is no big deal for us. Growing up my dad usually got home aorund 8pm so that is when we ate, it is normal for us.

[Abigail4476]

It's a priority thing. If you feel that having family dinner is important, you'll make it important. If you don't, you won't. I'm not saying that's bad or good--whether you do it or not is reflective of your family dynamic. Some families sit down and eat breakfast together every morning--it accomplishes the same purpose. The idea here isn't that you have to do it at dinnertime--the idea is the whole family sitting down together on a regular basis and spending time with one another. For some families that might be every Saturday morning for pancakes and have a big dinner every Sunday after church. Personally, I think more often than that is better, but I understand that it can be hard to pull off for people who are overloaded. I would argue a case for simplification, but that's probably a different thread.

 

We do limit our kids extra curricular activities to no more than one per child (not counting music--that's a basic requirement). The reason we do that is because I feel that down time and family time are just as important as academics and athletics. If we allowed them to be involved in everything that came their way, the whole family would suffer as a unit. I'm not willing to allow that and we restrict their schedules so that we have time to sit down together at the end of the day and talk and laugh and pass the vegetables and "take a load off."

[Lady Florida.]

It's a priority thing. If you feel that having family dinner is important, you'll make it important. If you don't, you won't. I'm not saying that's bad or good--whether you do it or not is reflective of your family dynamic. Some families sit down and eat breakfast together every morning--it accomplishes the same purpose. The idea here isn't that you have to do it at dinnertime--the idea is the whole family sitting down together on a regular basis and spending time with one another. For some families that might be every Saturday morning for pancakes and have a big dinner every Sunday after church.

 

Yes. This. And there's something about eating a meal together that's different than spending time together in other ways.

[Janie Grace]

We eat dinner together every night except for nights when there is baseball practice (once or twice a week). Then I feed those kids early and have dinner with the littles and dd while dh is at practice w/ the boys. It's actually kind of nice to have this time w/ dd and the littles. But in general, YES -- I couldn't imagine not having dinner as a family. It was important in both of our families growing up, and is not something we're willing to forego.

[emmn]

We eat dinner whenever we can as a family. I wish it was more, but activities drive us away from the table too often.

[dcurry]

This ought to be an official poll- I'd love to see the numbers w/o reading through 10 pages.

 

I used to be shocked at the idea that families wouldn't eat together at the table every night... I remember as a high schooler this idea being "promoted", and I remember specifically thinking, "What do they do INSTEAD of eating together as a family?" I honestly couldn't think of any alternative.

 

But now.... sometimes I throw something together last minute and we eat in the living room with a movie, sometimes everyone eats when they are hungry, sometimes the table is piled and we CAN'T eat at the table together, sometimes dh is not home and it's too much effort to cook for kids only who wouldn't appreciate it (they are picky eaters), so we've gradually gotten away from eating dinner together. I'd love to get back to it, though. I really do think it's important as there really isn't another time that we are all together as a family.

 

Yes, we homeschool, but with many different ages, everyone is doing their own thing or I am working with the younger kids. It's rare to have all of us sit down together and just visit with each other. When my oldest started bringing a book or wearing headphones to the dinner table, I started realizing that we really need to get back into the habit of actually sitting & talking together.

 

Now, when I set the table, my kids say, "Why are we eating at the table tonight?" or "Who's coming over?"

 

:sad:

 

And we're only gone about 2x/week during dinner hour.

[Jenny in Florida]

It's a priority thing. If you feel that having family dinner is important, you'll make it important. If you don't, you won't. I'm not saying that's bad or good--whether you do it or not is reflective of your family dynamic. Some families sit down and eat breakfast together every morning--it accomplishes the same purpose. The idea here isn't that you have to do it at dinnertime--the idea is the whole family sitting down together on a regular basis and spending time with one another. For some families that might be every Saturday morning for pancakes and have a big dinner every Sunday after church. Personally, I think more often than that is better, but I understand that it can be hard to pull off for people who are overloaded. I would argue a case for simplification, but that's probably a different thread.

 

We do limit our kids extra curricular activities to no more than one per child (not counting music--that's a basic requirement). The reason we do that is because I feel that down time and family time are just as important as academics and athletics. If we allowed them to be involved in everything that came their way, the whole family would suffer as a unit. I'm not willing to allow that and we restrict their schedules so that we have time to sit down together at the end of the day and talk and laugh and pass the vegetables and "take a load off."

 

Oh, I understand we "could" eat together more often. I think the problem in our house is that we have a lot of VERY strong personalities with distinct preferences. And I have a pair of kids who are truly passionate about their activities. They are passionate enough that one plans to make a career out of it and I strongly suspect the other will go in that direction, also. If they don't have opportunities to be heavily involved, they wilt in front of our eyes.

 

While I wouldn't sign up kids for things willy nilly just to keep them busy, we are happy to be supportive and make sacrifices to allow them to pursue their passions.

 

I guess it's like anything else: What you have is normal to you. I cannot imagine having kids who are different than mine are.

[MissKNG]

I grew up eating dinner as a family and think it's a great thing to do.

 

For us, my dh works late so it's just me and the girls for dinner M-F and he joins us Sat and Sun.

[Audrey]

We eat supper together every day. I grew up like that (as did dh) and we both think it's competely weird not to eat supper together as a family every day.

[Hwin]

We eat dinner together 5 nights/week as a family. My husband works the other two nights, and dinner is pretty casual on those occasions.