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My turn, would this bother you?


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We recently moved and I wanted to get involved with an area homeschool group. I decided to go with a secular group, because all the ones I found had some form of "statement of faith" and I didn't want to get into all that.

 

The leader called me yesterday, because I have to me interviewed first. Things were going fine, she asked me why I wanted a "secular" group and she understood and even brought up the "statement of faith" issues ;).

 

Before I got off the phone she said, "Oh one last thing. We don't allow you to have any signatures on your emails, so if you have one take it off."

 

I guess a couple ladies in the group got offended at someone's signatures, hence the rule.

 

I don't have a signature, but I really hate being told what I can't do with my own email account :glare:

 

Guess I'll keep looking :glare:

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Honestly, it would bother me a little, because I just don't like being told what to do! I'm sure there are some valid reasons behind this group rule, it's just too bad she didn't articulate them to you better. I've seen lots of people in my email contacts, that have their business info in their signature, like Jane Doe followed by the Pamper Chef info, or Susie Doe with the avon info. I bet it's something like that, where people were feeling constantly solicited. If it were me, I'd still test the group out.

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It sounds like something bad happened in the past involving signatures and they are trying to avoid a repeat. I would just set up a special gmail account just for that group, and have the messages forward to my regular email account so I knew when there was a message, and only answer them from the non-signature account.

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Me too. I wouldn't let it bother me if that was the only thing that seemed "off." People are quirky and at least this is one rule that's easy enough to follow. :)

 

:iagree: It's hard to know what prompted that rule, but I would give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that something iffy or offensive led them to that rule and they just don't want to repeat the ordeal.

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Ug. I'd move on too.

 

One I need yet another email account like I need a hole in the head. I refuse to have more than one ever again.

 

Two, it would be just a matter of time until I forgot to remove the sig and got in trouble.

 

Three, too much drama or sensitivity by the sound of it. Only a matter of time until I ticked someone off sig or not.;)

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My turn, would this bother you?

I don't think so.

 

I don't have a signature, but I really hate being told what I can't do with my own email account :glare:

 

 

Oh, it certainly wouldn't bother me if it didn't even apply to me (I also do not put a signature in my email).

 

I imagine the woman has been named peace-keeper, and as someone else said, is trying to prevent a repeat of a difficult situation that happened in the past.

 

You have very specific rules about what you can and cannot do with your avatar, signature, profile and post here. An email that goes only to one particular group really isn't that different, is it?

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I would probably pass. If they will make rules based upon someone getting offended by a signature how do they handle more grievous offenses?

 

 

This was kinda my thinking. I know it was a small issue, but since it was a rule made as a response to an offense...it sent up red flags for me!

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I wouldn't be offended. I'd give the group the benefit of the doubt and believe they had a legit reason to have the rule in place.

 

It wouldn't be enough for me to not join but I also don't get offended very easily.

 

 

I'm not really offended, it just didn't sit well...and I'm learning to trust my gut on these things a bit.

 

I appreciate all the different views though!!!

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What's next? No pink hair? How would you feel about that?

 

Of course it could have been something perfectly justifiable. But if there are people getting offended at, well, nonoffensive things, is the tail wagging the dog?

 

I'd not totally write them off, but I would be sure to spend some time visiting, observing and asking questions before fully committing. Hopefully they'd allow you to do that.

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What's next? No pink hair? How would you feel about that?

 

Of course it could have been something perfectly justifiable. But if there are people getting offended at, well, nonoffensive things, is the tail wagging the dog?

 

I'd not totally write them off, but I would be sure to spend some time visiting, observing and asking questions before fully committing. Hopefully they'd allow you to do that.

 

I probly should have mentioned that right before the sig comment she told me if she accepted me (right then and there) I would have to commit to regular attendance at their playdates.

 

I told I couldn't agree to that until I got to meet some of the families. She was a bit taken aback, but agreed. That probly added to my feelings of unease.

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I probly should have mentioned that right before the sig comment she told me if she accepted me (right then and there) I would have to commit to regular attendance at their playdates.

 

I told I couldn't agree to that until I got to meet some of the families. She was a bit taken aback, but agreed. That probly added to my feelings of unease.

 

Now that would bother me.

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I probly should have mentioned that right before the sig comment she told me if she accepted me (right then and there) I would have to commit to regular attendance at their playdates.

 

I told I couldn't agree to that until I got to meet some of the families. She was a bit taken aback, but agreed. That probly added to my feelings of unease.

 

The whole things reeks of control issues. While that might not be a deal breaker for some people I'm pretty sure you're working to avoid those situations, right?

 

She's telling you what you have to do? Not asking if these are acceptable to you? Adios.

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I probly should have mentioned that right before the sig comment she told me if she accepted me (right then and there) I would have to commit to regular attendance at their playdates.

 

I told I couldn't agree to that until I got to meet some of the families. She was a bit taken aback, but agreed. That probly added to my feelings of unease.

 

Frankly, this would bother me way more than the no signature lines in e-mails.

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The whole things reeks of control issues. While that might not be a deal breaker for some people I'm pretty sure you're working to avoid those situations, right?

 

She's telling you what you have to do? Not asking if these are acceptable to you? Adios.

 

Yeah, I hadn't read everything before I posted. I would also not join up with this group. Sounds like a bunch of headaches for the future.

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The email thing wouldn't bother me unless I already felt something was off with the tone of the conversation, kwim?

 

I say, try it out and see what the group is like. It could be that they've had some problems in the past that they're trying to prevent. It could be that everyone is great and the person you talked to is a control freak that got the job because she wanted to do it. The entire group could all be a tangle of drama and control, with one normal person for you to befriend before you run far away. :tongue_smilie: You'll never know if you don't try it.

 

They can't force you to continue if it's not for you.

 

Cat

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Grow a prefrontal cortex, already.

 

:lol: This made me laugh out loud. DD came running over to see what I was laughing at.

 

To the OP: After reading that you'd have to commit to regular attendance, I'd probably pass on the group. It just all seems a little too controlled for me, and I don't do well in situations like that. Sometimes we just need a break from all the extras and need to focus on us for awhile, and if this means no outside activities than so be it... it doesn't seem like this group would be open to that.

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We recently moved and I wanted to get involved with an area homeschool group. I decided to go with a secular group, because all the ones I found had some form of "statement of faith" and I didn't want to get into all that.

 

The leader called me yesterday, because I have to me interviewed first. Things were going fine, she asked me why I wanted a "secular" group and she understood and even brought up the "statement of faith" issues ;).

 

Before I got off the phone she said, "Oh one last thing. We don't allow you to have any signatures on your emails, so if you have one take it off."

 

I guess a couple ladies in the group got offended at someone's signatures, hence the rule.

 

I don't have a signature, but I really hate being told what I can't do with my own email account :glare:

 

Guess I'll keep looking :glare:

 

It would bother me a little, but some people get really ridiculous (as in LONG) with the signature lines on e-mail groups. Is it a yahoo group? If so and some member are on digest, long sigs just give them bigger messages and too much unrelated text to scroll through.

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I would assume that some members get emails on old computers or mobile phones for which some big signatures can be a problem. It seems like back in the early internet days, a lot of board and email loops prohibited signatures because some members had problems with them or they made it take too long to load.

 

I may be wrong about this and whether it even applies now, but I do seem to recall ....

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I don't know if it would stop me from joining the group if I was really looking for a group and everything up to that point had seemed promising... but maybe. It is pretty thin skinned and not a good sign.

 

One of the attitudes I feel like I keep encountering is this attitude that every email you get when you're on a group list is directed directly at you - which is I think part of how people can get offended by things like that. To me that's totally bizarre. I'm on several local-based homeschooling lists and people routinely send out things I'm not interested in at all, sometimes with sigs that I might find annoying, or that try to sell a product or something like that. But, honestly, I could care less. That's what the delete button is for.

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I was in a secular group (although there were many Christians there as well) once that had very strict rules and the email signature rule you mentioned just reminded me of why I left that particular group. As a Christian, you had to be extremely careful about everything that was said. One month there was a speaker (a prominent psychologist) who said something about the bible in passing during his discipline discussion and the leadership felt the need to go on and on at the next meeting apologizing for this. Then there was Christmas....one of the students got in trouble for writing a paper about what Christmas meant to her (Jesus) and the co-op teacher was asked not to initiate such controversial writing topics. it was all just too much for me. I wasn't there long at all. God is a very big part of my life and I just can't watch everything I say like that. I don't know that this group would be anywhere like that one, however.

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I was in a secular group (although there were many Christians there as well) once that had very strict rules and the email signature rule you mentioned just reminded me of why I left that particular group. As a Christian, you had to be extremely careful about everything that was said. One month there was a speaker (a prominent psychologist) who said something about the bible in passing during his discipline discussion and the leadership felt the need to go on and on at the next meeting apologizing for this. Then there was Christmas....one of the students got in trouble for writing a paper about what Christmas meant to her (Jesus) and the co-op teacher was asked not to initiate such controversial writing topics. it was all just too much for me. I wasn't there long at all. God is a very big part of my life and I just can't watch everything I say like that. I don't know that this group would be anywhere like that one, however.

This would worry me too.

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We don't allow signatures with links in our group. Primarily because of issues in the past with the links going to advertising sites, and advertising was not allowed in posts. Honestly, I'd still give the group a try, because you never know...

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I probly should have mentioned that right before the sig comment she told me if she accepted me (right then and there) I would have to commit to regular attendance at their playdates.

 

I told I couldn't agree to that until I got to meet some of the families. She was a bit taken aback, but agreed. That probly added to my feelings of unease.

 

Oh, never mind my last note... that would put alarm bells up for me.

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Personally, it wouldn't bother me.

 

But thinking -- why not have the support group start a Yahoo! Group or Big Tent Group (free) to avoid the signature issue? That would make everyone happy. Our support group does Big Tent.

 

Unless you post through the website, the sigline goes through yahoo groups. I'm on several and have it set up to be delivered and sent through my regular e-mail account. (It's then filtered into folders to keep my inbox under control.)

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If they are set up through a Yahoo Group, then I would not be bothered by it. This is a common request for various reasons.

I agree. Sig lines in a Yahoo! Group would be clutter, IMO. And it would be a PAIN to scroll down to read a thread. Makes sense. My beef is with those on Yahoo! who respond to a post and do not "clean up" the message they are replying to -- so it ends up being a long post of the same message and a sentence from the responder. Aaaaugh. Another reason our support group switched from Yahoo! to Big Tent.

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I'd probably try it out, to see if the group turned out to be okay or if they had any more weird rules.

 

It wouldn't be such a big deal to immediately turn me off though.

I don't know which email program you use, but I use Hotmail and I have a signature on my email. Sometimes I email people who I don't really want to include my signature on (like people from Craigslist lol)...so its really easy to just delete it before I send my message.

 

HTH!

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