Would you think anything of this?

[DawnM]

Last night I went to our local coffee shop I like and the two girls working behind the counter were both wearing shorts that were so short that their T-shirts covered them so it looked like they had no shorts on, except one of the girls had cut off jean shorts and she had strings hanging all over her legs from the shorts.   When she bent over I could see butt cheeks.   But the worst was that she had on a really old nasty dirty looking T-shirt.   It had holes in it, the neck was stretched out, and there were (what looked to be) stains in several spots, not new ones from working, but like an orange stain in one spot that clearly was very old.

It was a complete turn off and made me think the place wasn't clean, even though it is.   

But maybe I am just old and farty.

[HomeAgain]

I would worry about the health of the establishment.  Most food places have requirements that workers behind the counter wear appropriate clothing to protect from hot spills/injuries.  This doesn't sound safe for the workers if they're not getting full coverage.

[mmasc]

I wouldn’t care for it. 

[MEmama]

Meh. It's just a style 🤷‍♀️

[Carrie12345]

My dd serves coffee and struggles with finding shorts long enough to meet health codes. Her BSA official shorts are considered too short for her proportions. She’d never be allowed to wear actual short shorts.

My dream coffee shop (fades more every day 😔) would have a wear what you want policy (within health codes) but require store aprons.

Dd has to wear store t-shirts, which is a good thing, because they get destroyed quickly. I can actually imagine her being like, “I’m not spending more money on my own clothes for this place!” 

[mommyoffive]

I agree it is a style, but I am not down with that kind of style on the people that are making my food at the time they are doing it.  Also just wouldn't care for that kind of style at a place I am hanging out.  Not my kind of vibe.

[footballmom]

I can overlook a lot these days as long as the coffee drink I just paid $6+ is made correctly 🙃

[Heartstrings]

3 hours ago, DawnM said:

shorts.   When she bent over I could see butt cheeks.   But the worst was that she had on a really old nasty dirty looking T-shirt.

Was it a shirt for the establishment or just a random one?   One thing I didn’t really know until I picked up some PT work at places like that is that the employer only provides 1 shirt, the employee ls have to buy extras if they want, or if the first one is ruined but they are often expensive!  Usually it’s around equal in cost to 2-3 hours of work.  Since they are proprietary shirts there is No option for thrifting or clearance shopping.   It just doesn’t make financial sense for the employee to buy many extras or stop wearing one if it gets ratty.  The businesses could provide more shirts, or offer them less expensively but choose not to do so.  
 

That might also explain why the don’t cover the shorts, if the employee didn’t provide an array of sizes.  
 

Obviously none of of that applies if they were wearing cheap WalMart Shirts.  

Edited May 2 by Heartstrings

[Scarlett]

2 hours ago, DawnM said:

Last night I went to our local coffee shop I like and the two girls working behind the counter were both wearing shorts that were so short that their T-shirts covered them so it looked like they had no shorts on, except one of the girls had cut off jean shorts and she had strings hanging all over her legs from the shorts.   When she bent over I could see butt cheeks.   But the worst was that she had on a really old nasty dirty looking T-shirt.   It had holes in it, the neck was stretched out, and there were (what looked to be) stains in several spots, not new ones from working, but like an orange stain in one spot that clearly was very old.

It was a complete turn off and made me think the place wasn't clean, even though it is.   

But maybe I am just old and farty.

I am old and cantankerous right there with you.  I rarely say anything but I do have to shut my mind down a lot of the time to various things in restaurants.  
 

Last night at Braum’s an employee had what appeared to be his toddler grand daughter visiting….he was sitting her on the counter where food is picked up and letting her talk into the mic.  She had no shoes on and was running all over the store.  At one point she ran to me and starting climbing up me saying, ‘ I want you!’  Cute right?   Y’all…. Child was so dirty and smelled so bad.  I was trying to peel her off of me and it took her mother for ever to come get her.  I wasn’t rude but I felt really icky.  I was sitting there wondering if old age is setting in. 

[ScoutTN]

Restaurant staff should always look as neat and clean as their work allows. Short shorts are not appropriate. 

[saraha]

3 hours ago, DawnM said:

Last night I went to our local coffee shop I like and the two girls working behind the counter were both wearing shorts that were so short that their T-shirts covered them so it looked like they had no shorts on, except one of the girls had cut off jean shorts and she had strings hanging all over her legs from the shorts.   When she bent over I could see butt cheeks.   But the worst was that she had on a really old nasty dirty looking T-shirt.   It had holes in it, the neck was stretched out, and there were (what looked to be) stains in several spots, not new ones from working, but like an orange stain in one spot that clearly was very old.

It was a complete turn off and made me think the place wasn't clean, even though it is.   

But maybe I am just old and farty.

I’m judge-y like that too. We ate at a newer diner a few months ago. The restaurant was clean enough, but the high school girls working looked raggedy. Hair down, one had on shorts like you describe, no sense of uniform (like not even everyone wear a red top and jeans) so not sure who were actually waitresses. There wasn’t anything wrong per se, but we’ve had a couple of chances to eat out since and that place didn’t even come to mind. Guess I had written it off. 

I know I’m old, but in high school in the 90s, I worked for a summer at Frisch’s. We were issued a one size fits all polyester gray skirt (it had like 20 buttons inside to customize fit) a very thin blouse with miniature big boys printed on it that was so thin I had to wear a camisole under it, a little tie and they inspected our hairdo at every shift to make sure it was up sufficiently.
 

When I worked at Waffle House in college, we had to provide our own black pants, they gave us two blouses, a neckerchief and a bandana like thing to cover our hair. The ladies that worked full time always smelled like grease because it was hard to just have two shirts, especially if you had to use a laundromat. Who has time to do that every other day?

When I worked at a mom and pop restaurant, we provided our own white button downs and black pants. They gave us an apron. They also checked hair, if it couldn’t be pinned up off of collar, you got a hairnet.

[fairfarmhand]

I wounldnt like it. Every restaurant/food establishment my girls have worked at (and there have been many) require long pants for employee protection as well as non slip shoes. Hair must be up and for the chain restaurants hat or head covering worn for men and women. The tea shop required aprons. Most of the restaurants had dark colored tops to cover stains better.

[Arcadia]

The mini shorts I have seen often on student employees at community college and college cafes. Not surprising as I have seen college kids wearing mini shorts walking around campus. 
As for the T-shirts, I would be thinking that they just wear something they don’t mind getting damaged. When I was in high school, my chemistry teacher tells us to keep one set of school uniform for lab because our school uniform is going to look multicolored by the end of the school year. Most cafes I go to the employees have aprons. I think the employer supplying aprons is a good thing so any spillage/splash won’t stain someone’s shirt and pants that badly.

[Indigo Blue]

I mean…I can overlook stuff. But butt cheeks showing and looking really dirty? Nah. I’m not going back in there. 

[Scarlett]

2 hours ago, MEmama said:

Meh. It's just a style 🤷‍♀️

Butt cheeks showing and a stained up t shirt is a style?  

[fairfarmhand]

1 minute ago, Scarlett said:

Butt cheeks showing and a stained up t shirt is a style?  

My girls at college say so. There are blue Jean shorts cut so they reveal parts of the buttocks. 
 

The girls say they look Terribly uncomfortable. Who wants denim in their crack all day.

Edited May 2 by fairfarmhand

[saraha]

I wonder if it’s a coffee shop thing? I just asked dd20 what her clothing policy was at the coffee shop she worked at last summer and she said there was none. Not a hair policy, nothing. They wore whatever they wanted and their hair could be down, up, green, whatever

[Scarlett]

Another thing that bugs me is going through a drive through and seeing food all over the outside of the window and building and running down to the ground.  Why hasn’t someone thought to put that on a daily chore list?  Inspect and clean outside of drive through.  Maybe it is just how short staffed they are.  I don’t remember seeing that so much years ago.  

[gardenmom5]

I'd express "concern" to the owner that the way they are dressed gave the impression the place was dirty.  You might look past it, but I guarantee there were customers who felt that way and walked out.

[Arcadia]

2 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Butt cheeks showing and a stained up t shirt is a style?  

I don’t know about stained t-shirts but dirty looking Golden Goose shoes were fashionable here

E.g.

[Carrie12345]

1 minute ago, Scarlett said:

Another thing that bugs me is going through a drive through and seeing food all over the outside of the window and building and running down to the ground.  Why hasn’t someone thought to put that on a daily chore list?  Inspect and clean outside of drive through.  Maybe it is just how short staffed they are.  I don’t remember seeing that so much years ago.  

For DD, everyone is expected to be out of the building within 10 minutes of closing. That tends to leave 2 people sharing ALL service and closing duties. It sucks. 

[Indigo Blue]

I would be disappointed to see this become more and more normalized and defended. Just think what that would look like. Do we want people with long, unkempt beards, plumber’s crack, and stained, dirty clothing serving our food? There has to be (should be IMO) some standard. 

Edited May 2 by Indigo Blue
Typo

[Catwoman]

2 hours ago, MEmama said:

Meh. It's just a style 🤷‍♀️

I don't think dirty and stained is a style. It's just sloppy and unsanitary.

And the shorts might be a style choice, but they aren't an appropriate style choice for work. When you're pretty much flashing your butt at the customers every time you bend over, and your place of employment isn't a strip club, I think it's tacky and that the owner/manager should seriously think about implementing a dress code. 

[marbel]

Super short shorts with butt cheeks showing and dirty ragged t-shirts may be a style, but it's still not an appropriate style for general food service. I mean, appropriate clothing for servers in a cocktail lounge is going to differ from that in a coffee shop, right? 

I get it that employees usually don't get enough company-issued clothing, though the bagel shop my daughter worked for was handing out new t-shirts for the staff all the time - that was an exception to any place else that I've ever known of. 

I wouldn't say anything but I'd likely not go back. Even in Philly, which has an anything-goes, take it or leave it sort of vibe, I've never seen anything like described in the OP. It does give off an impression of carelessness which is reasonable to guess might extend to the food prep.

 

[gardenmom5]

2 minutes ago, saraha said:

I wonder if it’s a coffee shop thing? I just asked dd20 what her clothing policy was at the coffee shop she worked at last summer and she said there was none. Not a hair policy, nothing. They wore whatever they wanted and their hair could be down, up, green, whatever

Coffee shops are among the cheaper to open shops.  The owner hasn't thought things through.   You'd think there would have been health dept rules posted.  I'd be wondering if they were *required* to wash their hands.

We visited with some friends who now live in a 'resort' area.  The wife has a (very profitable) business background and she refuses to call the small local shops businesses - she staunchly refers to them as someone's "hobby".  All because the majority of the owners know squat about what it really takes to run a business. And the town has NO chamber of commerce to help the businesses that are supposed to cater to tourists.  Their businesses tend to have turnover because they don't change the policies from the off season to the tourist season to maximize potential profits and they fail, or it's more work than they want to put in.   I've seen something similar elsewhere when we stayed at a B&B being run by NON-locals.  They were shocked at the contempt with which the locals would treat tourists - leaving tourists inclined to spend a lot less in their shops, pointing out "this is your Christmas!"

[kbutton]

If a butt crack is unprofessional, so are butt cheeks. And all butt parts strike me as potentially/likely unsanitary no matter how clean you are—those parts are swabbed before major surgery and childbirth for colonizing bacteria for a reason. If someone scratched their butt, even through their clothing, and handed over food, people would be appalled. Hanging out portions of butts seem obviously inappropriate in food service.

 

 

[Catwoman]

14 minutes ago, marbel said:

Super short shorts with butt cheeks showing and dirty ragged t-shirts may be a style, but it's still not an appropriate style for general food service. I mean, appropriate clothing for servers in a cocktail lounge is going to differ from that in a coffee shop, right? 

I get it that employees usually don't get enough company-issued clothing, though the bagel shop my daughter worked for was handing out new t-shirts for the staff all the time - that was an exception to any place else that I've ever known of. 

I wouldn't say anything but I'd likely not go back. Even in Philly, which has an anything-goes, take it or leave it sort of vibe, I've never seen anything like described in the OP. It does give off an impression of carelessness which is reasonable to guess might extend to the food prep.

 

I'm in a very liberal area, too, and obviously dirty/stretched-out t-shirts and ratty shorts that show butt cheeks would not fly here, either. 

Aside from the inappropriateness of the shorts, who wants to be served by a person who clearly has poor personal hygiene habits? Yuck!

 

[marbel]

Regarding the comments about being old... I'm old too. And I get that styles change, etc. But the comments reminded me of something a customer (at a bank) said to me about businesses not caring about maintaining old people as customers: "they should care; we're the ones that have the money." 

Of course that's not universally true, but, ya know, she wasn't wrong either.   

[Catwoman]

Just now, marbel said:

Regarding the comments about being old... I'm old too. And I get that styles change, etc. But the comments reminded me of something a customer (at a bank) said to me about businesses not caring about maintaining old people as customers: "they should care; we're the ones that have the money." 

Of course that's not universally true, but, ya know, she wasn't wrong either.   

And in this case, I could easily also imagine young families not wanting to go there, either, because even forgetting about the cleanliness issue, who really wants their little kids looking at some girl's butt every time she bends over? It's not the beach! 

There are appropriate places for the employee to wear revealing clothing, and a coffee shop isn't one of those places. I'm not sure there is ever an appropriate place to wear that t-shirt...

[fairfarmhand]

Just now, Catwoman said:

And in this case, I could easily also imagine young families not wanting to go there, either, because even forgetting about the cleanliness issue, who really wants their little kids looking at some girl's butt every time she bends over? It's not the beach! 

There are appropriate places for the employee to wear revealing clothing, and a coffee shop isn't one of those places. I'm not sure there is ever an appropriate place to wear that t-shirt...

Other than cleaning at home or weeding the garden....yeah.

 

[DawnM]

1 hour ago, Heartstrings said:

Was it a shirt for the establishment or just a random one?   One thing I didn’t really know until I picked up some PT work at places like that is that the employer only provides 1 shirt, the employee ls have to buy extras if they want, or if the first one is ruined but they are often expensive!  Usually it’s around equal in cost to 2-3 hours of work.  Since they are proprietary shirts there is No option for thrifting or clearance shopping.   It just doesn’t make financial sense for the employee to buy many extras or stop wearing one if it gets ratty.  The businesses could provide more shirts, or offer them less expensively but choose not to do so.  
 

That might also explain why the don’t cover the shorts, if the employee didn’t provide an array of sizes.  
 

Obviously none of of that applies if they were wearing cheap WalMart Shirts.  

Random.   It honestly looked like it may have been her dad's college shirt he overwore and it was thin, hole-y, and ratty looking.

[SKL]

Given that it's a food establishment, I think shorty shorts are just not hygienic.  I recall someone telling me their friend wasn't allowed to participate in cooking class because she was in shorts.  It makes sense to me.

A dirty shirt would also be a turn-off.

I get that the style is short cut-offs and t-shirts with ripped tops.  One of my kids likes that style.  (She wears a halter or tank top under the ripped shirt.)  But most food establishments and other public-facing jobs have some sort of dress code.  My kid got hired at Dunkin and she isn't allowed to wear any facial piercings.  So her one tiny nostril ring will have to come out during her shift, even though that doesn't seem to have anything do do with the quality of donuts, coffee, or service.

[Heartstrings]

56 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Maybe it is just how short staffed they are

A lot of businesses are purposely running permanent skeleton crews right now.  They know customers will blame “kids these days” or “no one wants to work anymore” or the government instead of the establishment so they can get away with it.  

[Heartstrings]

19 minutes ago, DawnM said:

Random.   It honestly looked like it may have been her dad's college shirt he overwore and it was thin, hole-y, and ratty looking.

Yeah…that’s not ok.   Cheap white tees that fit from Walmart would be fine for budget mindedness but sloppy oversized and threadbare isn’t ok.   

[DawnM]

5 minutes ago, Heartstrings said:

Yeah…that’s not ok.   Cheap white tees that fit from Walmart would be fine for budget mindedness but sloppy oversized and threadbare isn’t ok.   

The other girl had on a college oversized sweatshirt, so there was no uniform or anything.   The college sweatshirt was blue.

[annandatje]

I would enjoy my coffee and not give a second thought to way employee is dressed.  Sounds like you’ve been satisfied with shop long term.  If she is a slacker, they will get rid of her.  

[Catwoman]

13 minutes ago, annandatje said:

I would enjoy my coffee and not give a second thought to way employee is dressed.  Sounds like you’ve been satisfied with shop long term.  If she is a slacker, they will get rid of her.  

It wouldn’t concern you at all that the employee was wearing an obviously dirty and stained shirt? Wouldn’t that make you question the cleanliness of the entire shop, particularly places like kitchen areas that you wouldn’t normally be able to see from the counter?

[annandatje]

No.  My guess is that shirt is stained, not dirty.  I have never been able to get worked up about what people wear, plumber’s crack, cleavage, revealing tight clothing. 

I would refer to local health department inspection score and details in report if I suspected lack of cleanliness or simply stop going to establishment. 

[wendyroo]

2 minutes ago, Catwoman said:

It wouldn’t concern you at all that the employee was wearing an obviously dirty and stained shirt? Wouldn’t that make you question the cleanliness of the entire shop, particularly places like kitchen areas that you wouldn’t normally be able to see from the counter?

It wouldn't bother me. An orange stain on an old, ratty shirt could be a spaghetti sauce stain from 10 years ago - totally not a health issue. And a server with a pristine shirt could have just used the bathroom and not washed their hands. 🤷‍♀️

I guess I just assume that us human apes are fairly filthy and that hygiene is a bit of an allusion. Obviously I support rules about cooking meat to safe temperatures, storing foods in appropriate conditions, etc. But I also accept that perfectly safe food has bug parts in it; that there is almost certainly fecal bacteria on the salt and pepper shakers, the cash register keys, and on the ice in my water; and that realistically I put myself at far more actual risk driving to the restaurant than consuming whatever disease-laden food they serve me.

I think this is one of those areas that the gross-factor overrides science and logic in many people's minds. Like how sitting on a wet toilet seat in a public restroom squicks many people out, but scientifically isn't linked to a real health risk. Food poisoning is indeed a real health threat, but I doubt it correlates strongly to whether the person serving the food is wearing a shirt that is too thin or stained or shorts that are too short. If I wanted to judge how hygienic a server was, I would focus more on how often and how well they wash their hands.

[gardenmom5]

1 hour ago, Catwoman said:

And in this case, I could easily also imagine young families not wanting to go there, either, because even forgetting about the cleanliness issue, who really wants their little kids looking at some girl's butt every time she bends over? It's not the beach! 

There are appropriate places for the employee to wear revealing clothing, and a coffee shop isn't one of those places. I'm not sure there is ever an appropriate place to wear that t-shirt...

We have "bikini baristas" here for independent coffee kiosks.  They're all drive up (with big windows for the view).  And people can avoid them.  They are expected to be well groomed. . . . *and look clean*

1 hour ago, DawnM said:

Random.   It honestly looked like it may have been her dad's college shirt he overwore and it was thin, hole-y, and ratty looking.

so?  she's the one that chose to wear it to work in an establishment that serves food.

1 hour ago, Heartstrings said:

A lot of businesses are purposely running permanent skeleton crews right now.  They know customers will blame “kids these days” or “no one wants to work anymore” or the government instead of the establishment so they can get away with it.  

Around here, I see a lot of "help wanted" signs, many stating starts at $20 an hour - with benefits.    everywhere pays more than minimum wage, and we were one of the first places to implement $15 an hour a few years ago.

Edited May 2 by gardenmom5

[marbel]

5 minutes ago, gardenmom5 said:

Around here, I see a lot of "help wanted" signs, many stating starts at $20 an hour - with benefits.    everywhere pays more than minimum wage, and we were one of the first places to implement $15 an hour a few years ago.

I don't know anything about your area, but around here there are a lot of places with "help wanted" signs, but when one inquires, there is actually no help wanted. Young people have told me that they've applied and been told "we're collecting resumes for future openings" which of course never come. 

Or there could be an opening and it's set up to be very unattractive/unworkable for many people - for example, the ever-popular requirement to be available for any shift any time, with no regular schedule, which doesn't allow people to go to school, have a second job (if it's part time), etc. Try even making a dentist appointment when they're scheduling a month out but you don't know your work schedule till the week before, and the employer doesn't care. 

And of course this makes the employer look like they're trying to hire, but are unable to - (as was said upthread) "these kids today don't want to work."

 

[Lady Florida.]

The short shorts wouldn't bother me (I wore some pretty short mini skirts in my day) but the dirty tee shirt would. Fashion is one thing but at work, especially working with food and/or the public, your clothes should be clean.

ETA: I get that old stains don't equal dirty but I still think it's inappropriate to wear to work. 

Edited May 2 by Lady Florida.

[prairiewindmomma]

20 minutes ago, gardenmom5 said:

We have "bikini baristas" here for independent coffee kiosks.  They're all drive up (with big windows for the view).  And people can avoid them.  They are expected to be well groomed. . . . *and look clean*

so?  she's the one that chose to wear it to work in an establishment that serves food.

Around here, I see a lot of "help wanted" signs, many stating starts at $20 an hour - with benefits.    everywhere pays more than minimum wage, and we were one of the first places to implement $15 an hour a few years ago.

2 bedroom apartments on the eastside also start at about $3500/month. $20/hour gets you to $41,600 annually before taxes or anything, and a year of a 2br apartment is $42,000. $20/hour is nowhere near a living wage for the entire metro even if you’re splitting an apartment with a friend. 

[Catwoman]

22 minutes ago, Lady Florida. said:

The short shorts wouldn't bother me (I wore some pretty short mini skirts in my day) but the dirty tee shirt would. Fashion is one thing but at work, especially working with food and/or the public, your clothes should be clean.

ETA: I get that old stains don't equal dirty but I still think it's inappropriate to wear to work. 

Same here. And I kind of feel like if you're going to work in a stained t-shirt that's all stretched out and ratty-looking, personal cleanliness may not be your top priority, because who wants to wear a t-shirt that has obvious large stains on it? (And what business owner wants to project that kind of image? Whether or not the shirt was actually clean, it didn't look clean, so it would still make me question the cleanliness of the entire place, because appearances do matter.)

Edited May 2 by Catwoman
typo!

[wendyroo]

12 minutes ago, Lady Florida. said:

ETA: I get that old stains don't equal dirty but I still think it's inappropriate to wear to work. 

When my mom was a server at IHOP, circa 1970, the uniform included a dry clean only minidress, starched cuffs, and a bobby pinned "hat"/head band/tiara like thing.

Over the course of 40 years, my dad's job went from requiring a full suit and tie every day to dockers and a short sleeve polo shirt.

Times change.

There are still people who consider dyed hair, tattoos, nose rings, black nail polish, etc. inappropriate for work...and those clearly are not health issues. So I think the only people who have a real say in what is or is not appropriate work attire in a given setting are the health department, the owner/management, and the employee wearing the clothes.

I totally respect a customer deciding not to visit an establishment because it is not an environment they personally are comfortable in...there are many restaurants I will not go to because they are too loud for me. But it seems like pearl clutching to announce that an aesthetic choice is not "appropriate"...like if I tried to proclaim that it wasn't appropriate for a sports bar to have a bunch of TVs blaring because the appropriate dining environment is quiet so you can have sociable conversation while you eat. 🙄 Okay, Boomer.

[Catwoman]

I'm honestly pretty surprised that there are people here who don't think a food service worker should look neat and tidy.

I don't care about tattoos or piercings or makeup. I care that they look like they are clean.

[Jann in TX]

Last week my older dd got married-- out of state.  I rented a very large AirBB and we housed the whole wedding party-- so my 3 dd's , groom and groomsmen (plus a friend of theirs).

One morning youngest dd (a Sr in college) comes skipping down the stairs in a similar outfit to OP.... she had a ripped t-shirt (visible 'stains'-stained ON PURPOSE for part of the 'look') with neck stretched out so her pretty lacy bra-let showed its straps-more if she bent over and extremely short shorts that were not visible under shirt... when she bent over to pick something up off of the floor she basically MOONED me!  

I was happy that she was available to help me cook breakfast for the gang-- BUT I insisted she go upstairs and change " out of her jammies" (how I put it to her) first!   She said ' but I look cute ' and I just gave her a LOOK  and she retreated to change!    One of the groomsmen was an x-boyfriend of hers-- she had no business skipping around in that skimpy of an outfit in front of a guy who 2-years later still has a major crush on her! 

I see this and OP's situation as a sad trend going around-- but this mama still demands respect!

My dd totally knew her outfit was not appropriate for our situation (hosting a bridal party) and that she was only dressing that way to taunt her x...   the girl in the OP KNEW she was dressing suggestively-- it is a TREND-- it is up to the management to say what is appropriate or not for their business--

Being a mom of 3 girls ages 22-33  I dont have much say (really any say) in what they wear as they are all adults now...  but I had no issue in rolling my eyes and asking my youngest to change... and she had no issue changing so I would not feel uncomfortable (plus she now knew that I knew what she was doing when she chose to dress that way!).

Edited May 2 by Jann in TX

[marbel]

10 minutes ago, wendyroo said:

like if I tried to proclaim that it wasn't appropriate for a sports bar to have a bunch of TVs blaring because the appropriate dining environment is quiet so you can have sociable conversation while you eat. 

But if you walk into a sports bar, you expect a bunch of tvs, cheering/booing fans, and a lot of noise. So you choose not to go to one if you want to be able to have a quiet conversation.

Black nail polish, nose rings, tattoos... yawn, who cares? That's not what the OP described.  

Pearl-clutching? Come on. 

[Catwoman]

15 minutes ago, wendyroo said:

When my mom was a server at IHOP, circa 1970, the uniform included a dry clean only minidress, starched cuffs, and a bobby pinned "hat"/head band/tiara like thing.

Over the course of 40 years, my dad's job went from requiring a full suit and tie every day to dockers and a short sleeve polo shirt.

Times change.

There are still people who consider dyed hair, tattoos, nose rings, black nail polish, etc. inappropriate for work...and those clearly are not health issues. So I think the only people who have a real say in what is or is not appropriate work attire in a given setting are the health department, the owner/management, and the employee wearing the clothes.

I totally respect a customer deciding not to visit an establishment because it is not an environment they personally are comfortable in...there are many restaurants I will not go to because they are too loud for me. But it seems like pearl clutching to announce that an aesthetic choice is not "appropriate"...like if I tried to proclaim that it wasn't appropriate for a sports bar to have a bunch of TVs blaring because the appropriate dining environment is quiet so you can have sociable conversation while you eat. 🙄 Okay, Boomer.

"Ok, boomer?"

Seriously??? 

Cheap shots against those of us who disagree with you are unnecessary and insulting.

[Lady Florida.]

19 minutes ago, wendyroo said:

I totally respect a customer deciding not to visit an establishment because it is not an environment they personally are comfortable in...there are many restaurants I will not go to because they are too loud for me. But it seems like pearl clutching to announce that an aesthetic choice is not "appropriate"...like if I tried to proclaim that it wasn't appropriate for a sports bar to have a bunch of TVs blaring because the appropriate dining environment is quiet so you can have sociable conversation while you eat. 🙄 Okay, Boomer.

Actually a customer deciding not to visit an establishment due to what employees are wearing IS having a say. Also, I said the shorts don't bother me. Stains are an asthetic? Maybe for hanging out with friends yes, but for a work environment? Calling stained clothing inappropriate is pearl clutching? If nothing else (maybe she can't afford new shirts) an establishment apron to cover up the stains would be a good choice for the employer. BTW, ds' girlfriend is a barista at a local (not chain) coffee shop. She would be given a talking to if she went to work in stained clothing. Oh, and she has a nose ring, which she does wear to work and it's fine to do so. 

Nice name calling btw.

Edited May 2 by Lady Florida.