SKL Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 It is never ok. It is always wrong and illegal. 16 isn't jailbait in every state, I don't think. And I still don't know if they were sexually active when she was 16. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Age of consent by state: http://www.webistry.net/jan/consent.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom31257 Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I have a friend who was 21 and married a 49 year old man. He died a few years ago, and she still talks about how much she misses him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I question why a 33 year old would want to marry a person who is 16. What would they have in common? I suppose different people are attracted for various reasons, but I always wanted someone I could relate to on various levels. I wasn't looking for someone to take care of me or feel they are not my equal. :iagree: with the bolded. I have no problem understanding a younger person having a crush on, or even real feelings for someone older. It's not always about wanting to be taken care of. Sometimes it's about wanting the supposed wisdom that of someone older. Of thinking you are more mature than you really are. What I can't understand is a 33 year old, male or female, having romantic interest in a teenager. I can understand a relationship between an older teen and someone their early to mid twenties. Beyond that, I can't fathom it. I do agree that the age difference becomes less of an issue as you gets older. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TracyP Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I don't automatically have a problem with this just because of the age. I know several people who are in long term relationships where there is a large age gap between partners. If you love somebody you should follow the law in order to protect both partners, but this relationship would be legal in most states. Just because it goes against American cultural norms doesn't make it "yucky" automatically. Overall, I would have to take this on a case by case basis. You could ask me again when my dd is 16. I may see things differently at that point. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I have no problem understanding a younger person having a crush on, or even real feelings for someone older. It's not always about wanting to be taken care of. Sometimes it's about wanting the supposed wisdom that of someone older. Of thinking you are more mature than you really are. What I can't understand is a 33 year old, male or female, having romantic interest in a teenager. I can understand a relationship between an older teen and someone their early to mid twenties. Beyond that, I can't fathom it. I do agree that the age difference becomes less of an issue as you gets older. yes...16 yo's, even very mature grounded 16 yo's are experiencing life totally differently. They are still limited in their life experiences. I am 34. I find 16 yo boys totally unappealing because life is so different when you are 33 than from when you are a teen. P.S. I have a 16 yo dd. If a man of my age was attracted to her....daddy would have something to say about that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acorn Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Was she his child's babysitter? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gentlemommy Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 When I was 17-19, I dated three men. Ages 33, 34, and 38. I would say that since age 16 is under the legal age of consent, then my answer is no, it's not ok. However, all three men I dated were great, respectful, and people I enjoyed hanging out with, unlike my age mates. Edited to add-I was an odd teen. I worked at a nightclub (illegally, they didn't know how old I was, paid me under the table, and didn't ask) from when I was 15-17. I saw EVERYthing. By the time I was 17, i was over the 'party scene'. I travelled to Europe and Japan, had the opportunity to be on my own, was exposed to drugs and alcohol, ect. I bought my house at 18. I was wanting to get married and start a family, which is why I dated older men. The ones near my age weren't into that. Also, not to divulge tmi, but I was only s3xually active with one of them. We dated for a long time, and with all three men, there was never any pressuring or whatever. Anyway, all that to say, while I wouldn't advise it at all, it's not totally impossible to have a mutually consensual, respectful relationship with a large age gap. Since we live when and where we do, and there are laws, I would always advise both parties to wait until they are both over 18. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VeganCupcake Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 It isn't my cup of tea, that's for sure. I have a male friend who was 35, had a PhD, and married an 18 year old fresh out of high school. I still can't understand what they could possibly have in common, but they've been married 7 years and have two children, so it must work on some level. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Just wondering what the Hive thinks. Is there ever a circumstance where this is okay? Oh heck no. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I would also note that many 16yo girls are college students. Many have real jobs and some are businesswomen. There is a considerable range of maturity at that age. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 No. I was a very mature 16 year old. Yet, I was in such a different place at 16 than in my early 30'S. Yep. And that's why I said I could understand the 16yo but not the 33yo point of view. At 16 you are clueless about so many things, even if you're "mature for your age". By 33 you know how different those two ages are. I just can't understand romantic feelings for someone so much younger (and not yet an adult). Maybe it's because I taught high school starting when I was 26 (I taught elementary and middle school before that). Even at 26 those high school boys, some less than 10 years younger than me, seemed like children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Yeah, my sister was acting controller for a manufacturing firm when she was 18. She had more work experience at that point than some grandparents have. She was also an extremely strong person. If she had been interested in an older man, I would not assume he was manipulating her. But on the other hand, there are 25-year-olds who are misled and manipulated by their partners. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 As a mom thinking about my kids oh hell no. And yet at 16 I was dating a 20 year old and not many people had an issue with it. At work I work with a 17 yr old boy and a 21 year old woman that spend time flirting etc and I have told them both she is too old for him. And that is only 4 years (well and she has a toddler). I am 36 and the thought of even being interested in a 19 year old (same age difference as OP posted but the younger one legal) skeeves me out. How can a 33 year old possibly have something in common with a 16 year old? Even if the 16 yr old is very mature they are still only 16, even if they have led a very difficult life and have seen/experienced horrible things, there is still a wisdom that develops over time through life experience that a 16 year old would not be able to relate to. Not to mention the 33 year old is pretty much old enough to be her father. ewww. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laundrycrisis Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 IMO, no, but it does happen: http://www.people.com/people/archive/article/0,,20107733,00.html "Seinfeld, then 38, sallied over, made small talk and went away with the telephone number of Shoshanna Lonstein—then 17 and a senior at the private Nightingale-Bamford School in Manhattan." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommymilkies Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 What if genders were reversed? Still no. There is never an ok situation, honestly. Partly because of the huge power differential. Never, ever ok. I don't own a gun and I'm not generally a violent person, but if someone that much older creeped around my kids, a gun would be the least of their worries. I have spoons, dang it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I do have to kind of shake my head at the fact a lot of people did stuff they say would terribly upset them if their kids did the same. I'm not just talking about this thread. Wonder how realistic it is to expect our kids not to do some of these things. I mean granted, I get it, I don't want my kids to do certain things, but then again I think I have a pretty realistic outlook in terms of the stuff they might do. Our kids may make the same mistakes but that doesn't mean we want to encourage/endorse them, or that we would be happy about it. I don't want my kids to make the same dumb ass choices I made growing up. If I had not made those mistakes I could have saved myself a lot of heartache kwim. So yeah I don't want my kids to date older people,. I also didn't allow my kids to date and make out with others at 7 year old, which I did and was told how cute it was growing up. I hope my kids don't decide seatbelts don't matter, in fact neither do seats and drive around sitting on laps or in the trunk like I did kwim either and a hundred other choices I made as a teen and child. I want better for my kids, as does every parent. So realistic or not to hope they don't do those things, it would still upset me if they did. I don't expect them to be prefect angels and never screw up, but when they are 16 I would not be okay with them dating a much older person and that is a realistic view of things. Pretending that I would be okay with this stuff just because I did it when young would be like sticking my head in the sand and declaring teens will screw up anyway so there is no point in raising them not to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Still no. There is never an ok situation, honestly. Partly because of the huge power differential. Never, ever ok. I don't own a gun and I'm not generally a violent person, but if someone that much older creeped around my kids, a gun would be the least of their worries. I have spoons, dang it! Well, if your daughter did grow up to be very mature and did take a liking to an older man, would you rather accept that she can have such thoughts, and talk to her like a human being, or make her keep her thoughts and actions secret? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRAAB Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Well, my grandfather was 17 years older than my grandmother. I'm not sure how old she was when they married but definitely over 20. We have good friends where the wife is 16 years older than than the husband. Now that I think about it I know of several couples with an age difference greater than 15 years. The difference is they were both over 18 when they started dating and married. Sixteen is just too young in this day and age. If she were older, I would probably feel differently about it based on other couples I know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 When I was 16, my peers, even the "good ones" were into sneaking out to smoke, drink and have sex. I loved literature and classical music. I disliked crowds. I didn't relate to my peers, boys and girls--I found their preoccupations with clothes and make up ridiculous. I loved studying. When I turned 17 I met DH. He loved literature and classical music. Unlike my peers, he wasn't pressuring me into a physical relationship--at.all. We could finally talk about interesting things, go to museums and art galleries, attend free concerts and performances. He was 26. I don't think he really changed between 26 and 33 that much. We got married when I was 18, and we waited until we were married to have TeA. I think a 16 year old and a 33 year old could actually have a lot in common, especially if both are outside the vapidness of the mainstream culture. I think it is rare though, and doesn't always result in a "perfect marriage." Mine isn't, and we have struggled over the years, and sometimes things are good and sometimes they aren't, but marrying one's peer doesn't necessarily guarantee a great marriage either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 IMO, no, but it does happen: http://www.people.com/people/archive/article/0,,20107733,00.html "Seinfeld, then 38, sallied over, made small talk and went away with the telephone number of Shoshanna Lonstein—then 17 and a senior at the private Nightingale-Bamford School in Manhattan." I did not know this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Well, my grandfather was 17 years older than my grandmother. I'm not sure how old she was when they married but definitely over 20. We have good friends where the wife is 16 years older than than the husband. Now that I think about it I know of several couples with an age difference greater than 15 years. The difference is they were both over 18 when they started dating and married. Sixteen is just too young in this day and age. If she were older, I would probably feel differently about it based on other couples I know. I agree. My dad was 13 years older than my mom. My best friend's DH is 12 years older than she is. I have nothing against larger-than-typical age differences. But in both of those cases the women (the younger partners) were well into their 20's before the relationship began. They were adults. They were established in careers, supporting themselves, lived on their own, could vote and buy liquor and could do everything else adults can do that minors can't. The power difference was minimal to non-existent. It's just not the same with a 16 yo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I do have to kind of shake my head at the fact a lot of people did stuff they say would terribly upset them if their kids did the same. I'm not just talking about this thread. Wonder how realistic it is to expect our kids not to do some of these things. I mean granted, I get it, I don't want my kids to do certain things, but then again I think I have a pretty realistic outlook in terms of the stuff they might do. I remember when I first met dh, who was raising his son as a single dad. He once told me he didn't want dss to make the same mistakes he did. I told him he won't. He'll make his own mistakes and there's nothing you can do about it except be there for him when he realizes he screwed up. I think it's natural for us to not want our kids to not do things that are foolish or dangerous even if we did them. Not necessarily realistic, but natural. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 When I was 16, I was attending college and working about 25 hours a week. Because some of those hours were daytime hours there were people who assumed I was older. A guy who was I think 24 or 25 asked me out for a beer. When I told he was nice, but did he know I was 16, he got very embarrassed and shocked. Then, he asked me not tell anyone he'd asked someone so young out. Then, there was this guy who just set off my radar a little. He asked me out. I told him I was 16 and he told me he was 28 and that didn't matter. Um yes it does. That made me really run (figuratively, but I did exit and avoid the man). I guess part of my thoughts were I wanted to date someone who was "accomplishing stuff". At 16 I thought I was "accomplishing stuff" (in my arrogant and immature 16 yo mind). I couldn't think that a 28 yo that had dabbled in any number of low wage jobs and had not taken enough college classes to amass more than a semester's worth of credits was generally focused on getting anywhere in life or having goals. He was around my work a lot. He could have gotten to know me over time and had he revealed some actual goals besides still getting by at 28, maybe I would have considered it. at 17 I did date a man who was 23. He had more in common with me, not necessarily career goals at the time, but his job was in a career field of my interest and he demonstrated a level of compassion to others I had not seen before. I realize 6 years is not much of an age difference, but there can be a wealth of experience (work, education, other) that makes it big at that age. That man and I got to know eachother a little before dating. When I was student teaching there was a girl in my class who was dating an older guy. I think he was 29 or 30 and she was 17. He was a lawyer. I thought it weird that a man of his education level was interested in a high school girl and apparently with her parents blessing. Her parents were upper middle class. The girl was reasonably mature (for a 17 yo living at home and attending high school). Academically, she had some LDs so maybe her parents thought "she's never going to college, so there's no point in thinking about career". The supervising teacher and I suggested to her she slow the relationship a bit and get some career skills (or college, because it would be a stretch but not impossible for her). We told her we thought she should know what she wants out of life before attaching herself to someone who would have had a lot of power. We told her if he loved her, he would let her have time to figure that out. I don't think anyone should attach themselves to another without being to take care of themselves. I think being dependent at a young age with no job skills or post high school education sets up a dangerous power dynamic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momto10blessings Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 No. Gross. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinmami01 Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Never. In the U.S. that is never ok. Gross. :ack2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Can I be nosy and ask you how old you are? I'm 47. I skipped 2 grades. I also am mostly against grade skipping, but that"s a different thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momto10blessings Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 As a 34 year old woman I'm disgusted thinking of being romantic with a 16 year old. Or even 18 or 21. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Megbo Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 No, I don't think it's okay. This reminds me of the time Jerry Seinfeld dated a 17yo when he was in his late 30's. I started dating my Dh when I was 19 and he was 28, but I was a junior in college and he was grad student, so the age difference didn't seem to bother anyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Lots of marriages are not between two people "on the same level." Not everyone seeks that in a mate, at any age. I agree there should be no physical intimacy before age 18. Actually, I believe this is true for everyone, no matter the age of their date. Unless they actually get married first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Is it ever okay? Sure. The okay time was around 1100 CE. So if you have a time machine... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theYoungerMrsWarde Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 In this day and age, 16 year old girls can date 15/16/17 year old boys and that's it. Boy turns 18 and see ya in 2 years. :tongue_smilie: Especially given the current percentage of teenage sex and the laws concerning statutory rape. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venia Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I guess my marriage could be the poster child for this thread. We have an 18 year gap and we met when I had just turned 18. So do the math. We have been happily married for 14 years, have two awesome kiddos and hopefully have many more happy years to come. To quell your curiosity, we have a lot in common. We share the same values, interests, goals and more importantly a commitment to each other, our family and our future. I was working part-time and in college when we met. He was working two jobs. We leaned on each other during hard times, laughed and cried together. He encouraged me to finish school, when it seemed so unlikely. I was there for him when he was injured at work and laid off and through the death of family members. What possibly could he have seen in an 18 year old or I in a 36 year old? What we apparently did not see, was our ages. It was and is not important. Now, almost 16 years later, he is a stay-at-home father and I hold a Masters and work full-time at an outstanding job. He is healthy as a horse and I am the one with the health problems. Who would have guessed? Life is just too unpredictable. My parents had the same reaction as many of you. They could just not understand. They were horrified. They did not agree. By hanging onto that "social rule" and totally disregarding (and disrespecting) the individuals involved, their relationship with us is strained at best. We do what we can to maintain a positive relationship, but I cannot imagine my kids wanting to be close with people who "hate their dad and think their mom ruined her life". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I guess my marriage could be the poster child for this thread. We have an 18 year gap and we met when I had just turned 18. So do the math. We have been happily married for 14 years, have two awesome kiddos and hopefully have many more happy years to come. To quell your curiosity, we have a lot in common. We share the same values, interests, goals and more importantly a commitment to each other, our family and our future. I was working part-time and in college when we met. He was working two jobs. We leaned on each other during hard times, laughed and cried together. He encouraged me to finish school, when it seemed so unlikely. I was there for him when he was injured at work and laid off and through the death of family members. What possibly could he have seen in an 18 year old or I in a 36 year old? What we apparently did not see, was our ages. It was and is not important. Now, almost 16 years later, he is a stay-at-home father and I hold a Masters and work full-time at an outstanding job. He is healthy as a horse and I am the one with the health problems. Who would have guessed? Life is just too unpredictable. My parents had the same reaction as many of you. They could just not understand. They were horrified. They did not agree. By hanging onto that "social rule" and totally disregarding (and disrespecting) the individuals involved, their relationship with us is strained at best. We do what we can to maintain a positive relationship, but I cannot imagine my kids wanting to be close with people who "hate their dad and think their mom ruined her life". The difference between your story and the question by the OP was that you were an adult and a 16 year old is a minor. A child should not be dating a 30something. Once one is 18 then it's up to them if they want to date someone older. While they are still children, heck no. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 So many responses are sadly legalistic and ageist. Interestingly, I think that by homeschooling, we are increasing our children's chances of marrying or being in a relationship with an older partner. My daughter's social circle is rich with people who share her hobbies and passions, most of them are not her age. I expect this to continue as she gets older as well. Why all the focus on age, and why a 30 something man in a relationship with a 16 yo is gross by definition? One's character is one's character, and age doesn't matter. If a man is "marriage material," he'd be respectful and age doesn't matter. If anything, he'd be less impulsive. And if we think that every man is a pervert, then again, age doesn't matter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 The difference between your story and the question by the OP was that you were an adult and a 16 year old is a minor. A child should not be dating a 30something. Once one is 18 then it's up to them if they want to date someone older. While they are still children, heck no. Yes, everyone becomes a mature adult at exactly 18 years old. When they are 17, we still parent them, at 18, it is all up to them. Why should we even look at our children on an individual basis? Someone already decided that at 16 everyone is a child, and at 18 everyone is an adult. How nifty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Yes, everyone becomes a mature adult at exactly 18 years old. When they are 17, we still parent them, at 18, it is all up to them. Why should we even look at our children on an individual basis? Someone already decided that at 16 everyone is a child, and at 18 everyone is an adult. How nifty Seriously? Why not let a 17 year old date a 12 year old then. Age doesn't matter after all. Or even better how about a 10 year old and a 16 year old. After all it is ageist to say anything else. I consider those to be the same as any minor child dating someone much older. I never said I would be jumping for joy if they dated someone much older at 18, but at that point it is their choice. At that point they will be likely living on their own, either working or in post secondary and living an adult life. A 16 year old is typically in the 11th grade, living a teen's life, they should be focused on high school, planning for post secondary, and practicing for their driver's permit etc. They are not in the same place in life as a 30 something. They can get along, they can be friendly etc but they are not in the same place in life period. That does not mean 2 people have to be exactly the same, but there has to be soem common ground, and if there is enough common ground between a 16 yr old and a 33 yr old, then likely the 33 year old is far too immature to be a good partner anyway imo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatHomeschoolDad Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I question why a 33 year old would want to marry a person who is 16. What would they have in common? I suppose different people are attracted for various reasons, but I always wanted someone I could relate to on various levels. I wasn't looking for someone to take care of me or feel they are not my equal. After careful study, evolutionary biologists have found that the organ responsible for such decisions curiously lies 80-100 cm inferiorally to the cerebellum in the male to the species. This genetic quirk has also been tangentially linked to comb-overs, attraction to large, noise-making machines, and the urge to invade and overthrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Just wondering after reading the articles about Paul Walker. I had no idea who he was, but apparently he'd been with his girlfriend since she was 16 and he was 33 and the authors of the articles that I was reading didn't seem to think this was at all strange. I would imagine that the authors didn't think articles about the news of his tragic death were the time to start a debate/controversy over when/how he started dating his bereaved partner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisbeth Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I think there are exceptions, but in most circumstances, it is not a good idea, and there is probably something a little off about the guy. NOTE: I said in MOST circumstances. Not all. I don't think we should change our 18 as the age of consent law...it's a slippery slope to nowhere good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spy Car Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 After careful study, evolutionary biologists have found that the organ responsible for such decisions curiously lies 80-100 cm inferiorally to the cerebellum in the male to the species. This genetic quirk has also been tangentially linked to comb-overs, attraction to large, noise-making machines, and the urge to invade and overthrow. And here I thought that organ was located much lower than that :D Bill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shawthorne44 Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I don't know that I could make a blanket statement. An old boyfriend of mine married his first wife when she was 16. He wasn't 33, maybe mid to late 20's. I never met her, but knowing his background he was probably emotionally young for his age, and from what he said she was self-possessed and emotionally older than her years. When I knew him he was in AA. The reason for the divorce was not the age difference, it was him on his way to the bottom with alcohol and drugs. She wouldn't put up with it and divorced him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I think there are exceptions, but in most circumstances, it is not a good idea, and there is probably something a little off about the guy. NOTE: I said in MOST circumstances. Not all. I don't think we should change our 18 as the age of consent law...it's a slippery slope to nowhere good. I don't know what state you live in, but most of us already live in states where the age of consent for sex is under 18. 18 is a minority view. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venia Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 The difference between your story and the question by the OP was that you were an adult and a 16 year old is a minor. A child should not be dating a 30something. Once one is 18 then it's up to them if they want to date someone older. While they are still children, heck no. Honestly, I am not sure I changed that much between 16 and 18.... Legally, in my state, it would have been absolutely wrong if I had been two years younger. I agree to that point only. What I really want to get at is that there absolutely can be a mutual (and lasting) relationship between people of such ages. There does not need to be an element of "emotional immaturity" on the part of the man or "daddy issues" on the part of the female (both assumptions are actually quite offensive). Life stages and experiences can be a hurdle, but what relationship is without hurdles? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissKNG Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 Not unless you want Benson and Amaro knocking at your door. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 haven't read all the replies yet. I got married at 18 to someone who had just turned 32. We have been happily married for just under 21 years. My parents have a similar age gap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatHomeschoolDad Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 And here I thought that organ was located much lower than that :D Bill I think they were trying to account for different torso lengths. (I did have to get a meter stick out to confirm that one -- doesn't every HSer have one in the dining room corner?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alicia64 Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 In today's world: it's not okay. I would wonder why the 33 year old guy couldn't hold his own with someone his own age. Alley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spy Car Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 I think they were trying to account for different torso lengths. (I did have to get a meter stick out to confirm that one -- doesn't every HSer have one in the dining room corner?) After some careful measuring, I must concede your original figures are pretty spot-on :D Bill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatHomeschoolDad Posted December 2, 2013 Share Posted December 2, 2013 After some careful measuring, I must concede your original figures are pretty spot-on :D Bill Nice. Now the board moms have those images from us to contend with. Yikes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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