Mommyfaithe Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 What is your career/job?? I think my dh would be a great SAHD...but, I would not be a great breadwinner. I am a book kepper...and have been for years...my earning potential is pretty limited...I think anyway.. So, what does a woman do to outearn her dh.... Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milovany Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 (edited) What is your career/job?? I think my dh would be a great SAHD...but, I would not be a great breadwinner. I am a book kepper...and have been for years...my earning potential is pretty limited...I think anyway.. So, what does a woman do to outearn her dh.... I'm a classroom transcriber for deaf and hard-of-hearing students at the college and high school levels. I got started in this field exactly three years ago, just before my husband was laid off from a job. While I worked in-class the first 2.5 years in this field, I now work remote from home, transcribing for students all over the country while sitting on my bed in my jammies. :001_smile: You can read about the software I use here. I make twice per hour what my dh was making when he worked full time, so I can work fewer hours a day (in fact have to -- this is not a job one can do eight hours a day; I work 25-28 hours a week on average). My husband has been schooling the kids since this started last late-August. He's doing a better job than I did, although we changed the way we school at the same time, so I'm kinda comparing apples and oranges in saying that. He has no qualms about helping around the house, I appreciate that very much. He's also more into the care and development of our two acres (garden, animals, etc.) than I am, so this has freed him up for that a bit, too. This is our life and we make it work. The whole family works together to do what we need/want to do. My dh still works sometimes, too (he's a carpenter/handyman). He has the opportunity to train in a new area and my working like this helps because I can provide the bulk of the income while he receives "training pay." It's a great fit because I can't do this forever and what he's going to train in will be something he can do into the early part of our later years. If you'd asked me 10 years ago, or 5 years ago, if I thought we'd go this route (me and/or both of us working), you would have gotten a resounding "no." The woman's place is in the home, the mom should be the one home with the kids, and all that. But I've learned that we don't always have everything figured out. This is what we've been given by God and we are going with it in a positive way. (It's helpful that I love my job!!) Edited January 21, 2012 by milovaný Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted January 21, 2012 Author Share Posted January 21, 2012 Very Cool!!! This sounds like a wonderful career. You must be able to type really well....hmmmmmm....I really should have taken that typing class seriously in High School.... Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
higginszoo Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 My s-i-l is a physician (psychiatrist) and her dh, a comic book artist, stays home with their little boy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8circles Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 Before kids I was a software consultant. I enjoyed it but the travelling took a toll on me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 One of my guy friends, who has a French degree like mine, stayed home when his babies were little. His wife had a degree in biochemistry and she did some type of ocean research for maybe Marineland? Can't exactly remember. Just know she made more money than he did, so he stayed home with the kids. They both work now that their kids are in school, but the wife is now a science teacher at a high school, and I think he might make more than she does now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milovany Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 (edited) Very Cool!!! This sounds like a wonderful career. You must be able to type really well....hmmmmmm....I really should have taken that typing class seriously in High School....Faithe You know what? I was fast, but not super fast when I started training. I think they want 55 wpm without errors (although that may have been raised since I trained). The program teaches two things: 1) a way to abbreviate that uses far fewer key strokes, AND 2) how to listen to the teacher, interpret what he/she is saying and "chunk" it into basic meaning-for-meaning sentences. It's a constant info in/info out process for the entire class. Both of these skills are important, and developed through the training. That said, yes, I'm fast, but not in the ways you might think. I'm fast only if I can use my abbreviations and only if I'm working (typing in a meaning-for-meaning format without being interrupted). I'm not good at word-for-word transcription at all. If someone wants to see what I do and just starts reciting something so I can type it, I stink. :tongue_smilie: And my regular (without software) typing is SHOT. I'm even slower at that now because I have to think while I type in that way again. I have to force myself to not abbreviate. Thankfully, this software company released a non-professional version of the software that I can have on my computers so that I can use my abbreviations anywhere on my computer (here, in my email, in word processing documents, etc.). Edited January 21, 2012 by milovaný Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyK Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 Many/most of my female friends from college or law school earn more than their husbands. I guess that's still unusual? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
black_midori Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I'm a CPA & if I worked full-time I'd at least match dh (and potentially out-earn, if I chose to go the partner of firm route). Working part-time is great, though - and I love staying at home doing school with the kids!! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizzyBee Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 What is your career/job??I think my dh would be a great SAHD...but, I would not be a great breadwinner. I am a book kepper...and have been for years...my earning potential is pretty limited...I think anyway.. So, what does a woman do to outearn her dh.... Faithe I am a CPA. I think earning more than dh turned out to be a double edged sword. I'm glad that since I work, I have a "career" and not just a "job." I ended up working and he became a sahd because I was not only earning more than him when the kids were born, but I also had more opportunity for advancement. But it's caused problems in our relationship, and if we could have a do-over, I would have insisted on doing things differently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink and Green Mom Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I did as an attorney at a large firm. Everyone female I worked with outearned their husband or boyfriend unless he was an attorney also. I agree with the poster above me though. Both my DH and I are from families where Dad went to work and mom stayed home. My earning status caused lots of hard feelings on both our parts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lluv Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 (edited) Before the birth of DS2, I was a health care data analyst. DH was in business to business sales and made good money until the economy went bust and no one wanted to buy anything. He switched to insurance and was making about 20% less than I was. When DS2 was born preemie, we made the tough decision for me to quit, take care of preemie and homeschool DS1. It hasn't been easy to make less than half what we were, but it's def. been worth it! I agree with PP- I think there were times when my making more $ did put stress on our relationship. Now DH jokes that I should go back to work and he should be a SAHD, and I tell him NO WAY! :lol: Edited January 21, 2012 by lluv Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ester Maria Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 Off the top of mind (not necessarily personal experiences): Real estate ownership / rentals. The best "job" in the world, hands down - regardless of your gender, if you own real estate on comparatively good locations and know a little bit about business, this is one of those "I do not work for money, money works for me" kind of things. There are people who are able to live off property ownership, just like there are people who live off inherited money and investing. This is a potential outearning career for a woman who has money or property. There is also translation / interpreting of a more "serious" kind (for international organizations and business, of a more specialist type, etc.); since women tend to be more "languagey", this is a good potential career for those that are competitive and truly proficient in a combination of languages that is in demand. Traveling might take its toll, though. Law. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jar7709 Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I earned more than DH during most of our marriage. DH and I currently earn about the same even though he is FT and I am PT. I cut back because I wanted to spend more time with the kids and homeschool, but I could jump back to FT and climb up the ladder fairly high if need be. I am a geologist/project manager for a consulting firm. He builds boats. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer in MI Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I was in human resources management and was making LOTS more than dh. I quit when I had my first child and never went back. Someday, I will!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 MD. Although I'm a low-paid one, relatively, I make more than he would make, plus I get to pay into a retirement fund, deferred comp, and good but not great health insurance. And I have a fascinating job, really rewarding (even if the snow bound patients did a lot of screaming and fighting and slamming doors today.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennyD Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I know lots of women who outearn their husbands. Just off the top of my head, I can think of an investment banker whose husband is a rabbi, a doctor married to a SAHD (he's a former attorney who quit to stay home), another investment banker married to a professor, a lawyer married to a professor, two different professor-professor couples in which the woman outranks the man (and presumably earns more), and I'm sure more will come to me. I think it's pretty common these days. These aren't homeschooling families, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted January 21, 2012 Author Share Posted January 21, 2012 This is fascinating..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 (edited) My Mom out earned my Dad, she was a greenhouse manager for some big home stores, and he is a chief of survey for a small company that has national accounts. She also out earned him when she was a nurse. It's never been good, I can tell you that. Frankly, I have no idea why they're still married, but hey, it's not MY marriage. The other ones I know, the women are lawyers, one is an RN with her masters and a freaking alphabet behind her name-her Dh is an accountant. She buys houses on her own. :-) One was a local bank president. Edited January 21, 2012 by justamouse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hypatia. Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I was a nuclear engineer and DH is in the military. I'm now staying home with the kids and he has been in the military almost 20 years, I still earned more than he currently does. My career was not flexible with locations, we've lived in several different states in the past few years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClassicalTwins Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I am an implementation consultant for Electronic Medical Records. Basically I go to hospitals nationwide and help them get their physicians, nurses & staff using the computer for documenting patient care. My husband stays home & does the home stuff, he's done this for about 6 years now. At first he quit his job because it was silly to pay for child care for twins that were about 28 months old. We thought when they started school he'd go back to work, but K was a diaster so he suggested we pull the twins out and we would figure out how to homeschool them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarymelon Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I am a family nurse practitioner, and my dh is a self employed painting contractor. He worked full time when I was in school and our kids were little. Now he works part time about 6 months out of the year. He is pretty happy with a low pressure job and I am pretty ambitious and want to work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 What is your career/job??I think my dh would be a great SAHD...but, I would not be a great breadwinner. I am a book kepper...and have been for years...my earning potential is pretty limited...I think anyway.. So, what does a woman do to outearn her dh.... Faithe I am definitely the main breadwinner. Farming pays jack, and we have a tiny farm (comparatively speaking). My dh also works part-time for the municipality, but that's very part-time and somewhat seasonal. I work a few jobs that equal more than full-time, but the beauty of it is that only one of them requires me to sit in an office. The rest I do from home and travel to meet clients as needed. In a way, we both get to be stay-at-home parents of a sort. It works well for us. My dh is just fine with being a "kept man" as he likes to say. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I was a nursing attendant. I didn't make more hourly, but I worked 6 days a wk, and pulled at least 1 16 hr shift in a pay period. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renee in NC Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I am a CPA. I think earning more than dh turned out to be a double edged sword. I'm glad that since I work, I have a "career" and not just a "job." I ended up working and he became a sahd because I was not only earning more than him when the kids were born, but I also had more opportunity for advancement. But it's caused problems in our relationship, and if we could have a do-over, I would have insisted on doing things differently. I *will* be a CPA this year.;) I will seriously out-earn dh when I do. However, thought he wants to quit work and homeschool the kids, I don't think it is a good idea for this reason. I can see it causing major problems. So much so, that I would rather see the dc in a halfway decent ps and the youngest in daycare. I think in our case it is that important. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in Neverland Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I am a principal at an international school. Before we came here I was a curriculum director for a huge public school district in the states. We have been married 15 years and I have out earned him for about 10 of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadianmumof5 Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 DH does something in IT for a multi-national logistics company :confused: When I was working FT, I was a marketing manager for various consumer packaged good companies. We made about the same. I started consulting 5+ years ago and my income was more than double what DH made. The $$ was great but then we decided to have another baby, and then homeschool so I only do PT consulting now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nono Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 Well, now I'm home, but boy did we have fun trying to figure out who was going to stay home! I outearned him by a decent amount, even though he was a higher rank in the company (we worked in the same firm). I was a pre-sales technology specialist, and he was in middle management. Gotta love a place that remembers who's worth more! ;) :lol: However, I'm a year older, took 4 v. 6 years to do undergrad, did my MBA at night v. 2 years out of the workforce, and was continously employed since I was 15. Yep. I pulled rank in that I had been working about 7 years longer than he, and I got to stay home. Now that he's been laid off, we're both home, and it's nice. :D Good thing is we have complementary skills that are sort of turning into a business, so we be working together again as small business owners. It'll be basically a unit salary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
readinmom Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I passed up dh about eight years ago. FIL complained about it all the time, said teachers are paid too much because all they do is sit around all day. (education held little value in their household growing up) DH lost his job two years ago. He is now a sahd. I don't think he likes it as much as he thought he would. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 DH lost his job two years ago. He is now a sahd. I don't think he likes it as much as he thought he would. When I was cleaning up, I found one of the last letters my mother wrote. She was encouraging and lauding hubby for staying home, saying it certainly wasn't "easy". Hubby has his lows, like anyone, but all in all he likes this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aelwydd Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I'm working as a NOC tech for a communications company (since my actual chosen field of work, public health, is facing massive cut-backs everywhere in this state). It pays well and has really good benefits, with a lot of upward mobility. My dh has been a SAHD since last fall, when he got laid off (he worked as a social worker in a public health clinic). Having our positions reversed could have caused us issues, if we both didn't realize that each us of has our own strengths and weaknesses. He's not as good at keeping everything neat and clean as I am, but he's a way better cook, and he's a fantastic teacher for our ds. I've got my own positives and negatives. The point being, I think issues crop up when people a, expect their significant other to do things exactly the same as they do, and b, resent the other for what they "gave up" to assume their new role. I sometimes miss being a SAHM, but that doesn't translate to me resenting my dh, because, frankly, I got to have that for the first several years of ds' childhood. I'm not anymore entitled or qualified to that role of teaching, caring for, or nurturing our ds than my dh. He deserves to get to be a full-time parent for our ds while he's still a child. And me? I enjoy the challenges of professional work, and having my personal sphere extend to beyond the home again. I also enjoy being able to take a more backseat role in terms of caring for ds, so my dh can really strengthen his own bond with our son. But, if the above isn't the case, then yeah, I see marriages being stressed or even ruined. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 When I was married to my ex-husband I out-earned him from the moment I met him until we divorced (nearly 11 years). Then again, I was his boss when we met, so that makes sense. I also had a college degree and he did not. By the time we divorced, assuming he was actually working, I made about 2.5 times as much as he did. I now work as a software consultant for HR software, and I have a Master's degree and additional certification. Last year I made 3x as much as my fiancee. This year it's looking like it will be about 2x, based on how well he's doing so far in his new job. He is piano salesman and a professional musician. It has never been an issue for me, either in my marriage or in my current relationship. It just is what it is. All of the money is going to the household anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pegasus Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I have civil and environmental engineering degrees and my work entails environmental remediation and technology research & development. DH has a degree in architecture. When we were expecting our first child, I was making twice as much as DH. It was not a difficult decision for us that he be the stay at home parent. He made it clear from the beginning that he would be a stay-at-home-dad and not a house-husband. It has worked for us and has not made our relationship more difficult or challenging. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Krista in LA Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 10 years ago, before I quit to be a SAHM, I was making more as a computer programmer than my dh was making. I'm thinking about getting back into it as this is my last year of homeschooling, but I have to figure out what classes I need to take to update my skills. I'm afraid I won't make as much as I was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizzyBee Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 (edited) . Edited January 22, 2012 by LizzyBee shared more than I should have Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 For the last three years before staying home to homeschool, I outearned DH by a significant amount. I was managing the Supply Chain/Logistics department for a high tech company. When DH and I both still worked at that company, our salaries were close (he was an Engineer and then an Operations Manager). However, he was laid off and took a large pay cut at his next job. In the last few years, he started up his own company which has replaced both of our previous salaries combined. He's much happier with the way things are now. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BamaTanya Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 We made the decision for dh to go to grad school (nights) while I taught elementary school. We did the whole tag-team parenting thing. After he earned his master's, I still made more when he went into a non-profit social services field. We flipped when he got a special ed job in ps and I quit ps to work in a small Christian school. Currently I'm teaching college courses part-time while working on a graduate degree. If I finish my Ed.S. program and go back to ps, I will be eligible to earn more again because of the degree. Right now, I'm not tempted. I might be in the future. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
butterflymommy Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 Both my BILs are outearned by their wives. In one couple the BIL is unemployed (no kids) and she is a mid level employee in the jewelry business (not retail, but the actual buying of the gems)-- she earns about 70k. In the other couple BIL is a handyman and his wife is a speech therapist. She earns 140k a year with less than 10 years experience. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted January 21, 2012 Share Posted January 21, 2012 I am nurse, and my dh is an electrician. I earn more per hour than he does, but he works a ton more, so he brings home more money. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 I am a physical therapist who works with kids ages 0-3yo. I could potentially make more than my husband because I make more in 2 hours than he does in a day but I only work one day a week and stay home with dd the other days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenC3 Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 For the first 3 yrs of our marriage I outearned dh by about 2x. After we had dd1 I stayed home and he began increasing his income to where he makes over twice what I did then:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TKDmom Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 (edited) I have a good friend who is a pharmacist. She told me once that she was making more that her husband could probably ever make. It was a real struggle for her, because on the one hand she wanted to be a SAHM, but on the other hand she was the logical choice to be the breadwinner. Edited January 23, 2012 by bonniebeth4 typo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wheres Toto Posted January 22, 2012 Share Posted January 22, 2012 I worked as an Executive Assistant for Pharmaceutical companies before I started staying home when my son was born. I pretty much always made more than my ex and that caused problems because he wanted the situation to continue that way. It caused a lot of problems when I was laid off and tried to go back to school to finish my degrees. DH makes much more than me and, as long as he's working, he probably always will. He's a executive level chemist for pharmaceutical R&D. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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