Cindyg Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 I bought a dress for a formal dinner. I was so thrilled because I got it for $12.99! The dinner is in a week. Last night, we got a last-minute invitation to a different dinner. I wore the new dress. It's the only formal dress. I have. OK. So the original dinner is less than a week away. There were people at the dinner last night who will be at the dinner next week. But I'm hardly the center of attention. Can I wear the dress again? I don't care for shopping or dresses, though it would not strain us terribly to buy another, though I'd rather not have to. Can I say yes to the dress? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyfaithe Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 wear the dress...accessorize differently...and maybe different shoes if you have them. Enjoy! Faithe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 I would have no problem wearing the same dress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whereneverever Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Same dress, different accessories. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Same dress. Not an issue. Sure there will be a handful of people who have seen you in it but the majority of the people have not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChristusG Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Same dress. Do you have a shawl or sweater that you could wear with it one of the times? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sharon H in IL Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Are you a Hollywood socialite? No? Then you are fine to wear the same dress twice. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Of course you can wear it! If anyone says anything, act very surprised. As in, "Oh, did I really wear this one last week? I'm so busy/ attend so many events, I can never recall!";) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamakimberly Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Of course you can wear it! If anyone says anything, act very surprised. As in, "Oh, did I really wear this one last week? I'm so busy/ attend so many events, I can never recall!";) haha. yeah, that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 OK, I'll be the Lone Dissenter. :D I wouldn't wear the same dress twice. The only exception might be if it was a very simple black dress that I could somehow accessorize to make look totally different. I think it depends on the crowd. Among our family, friends, and acquaintances, people would notice if you wore the same thing twice (ever -- not just a week or a month apart,) but I'm sure that's not the case everywhere. I think people may just be particularly shallow where we live. :tongue_smilie: And did you really get a formal dress for $12.99? Is it cocktail length or a gown? (When I think formal, I think of full-length.) I think you may be the Bargain Hunter of All Time, and I am very impressed!!! :001_smile: So where's the picture??? :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bootsie Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Two opportunities to wear a nice dress. How lucky! It is such a shame to have a nice dress you like and not get to wear it often. Is your husband wearing the same suit? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wapiti Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 A quote comes to mind, from where I'm not sure (help?), something like, better to wear a pretty dress three times than to alternate it with two ugly ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bnrmom Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 I would only wear it again if it was a large gathering. If it was a smaller gathering, I would not wear it again. But I'm weird like that. I don't wear the same thing to to anything twice where I will see the same people, even homeschool pe or science class. I had jury duty all week and wore something different each day. It's not something I spend a lot of time thinking about, but I just can't help remembering what I wore and deliberately picking something else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Of course you can wear it! If anyone says anything, act very surprised. As in, "Oh, did I really wear this one last week? I'm so busy/ attend so many events, I can never recall!";) :iagree: OR...if anyone suggests you wore the same dress, you could just say, "OMgosh...you really CARE! You must have absolutely NO LIFE at all." :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweetMissMagnolia Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 sure.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nono Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Was it comfortable? Did it make you feel attractive? If yes to both, then of course wear it again! If anyone says anything about it, well, they've just revealed a whole lot about themselves, haven't they??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfgivas Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 Reduce, Reuse, Recycle..... it is just nuts to only wear a dress once..... and recently both Kate Middleton and Michelle Obama have reworn dresses, which i think is a great example to follow! (if anyone said anything, that's how i'd answer, too ; ) enjoy it! enjoy the people! enjoy the events! ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 I would only wear it again if it was a large gathering. If it was a smaller gathering, I would not wear it again. But I'm weird like that. I don't wear the same thing to to anything twice where I will see the same people, even homeschool pe or science class. I had jury duty all week and wore something different each day. It's not something I spend a lot of time thinking about, but I just can't help remembering what I wore and deliberately picking something else. I do that, too. I don't really think about it, either, but as you said, I can't help remembering, so I pick something else. Glad to hear I'm not the only one! :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 . I don't wear the same thing to to anything twice where I will see the same people, even homeschool pe or science class. I had jury duty all week and wore something different each day. So how many clothes do you own??? Homeschool class as a weekly event... 52 outfits for that alone in one year.. where do you store them all? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 :iagree: OR...if anyone suggests you wore the same dress, you could just say, "OMgosh...you really CARE! You must have absolutely NO LIFE at all." :tongue_smilie: :lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindyg Posted October 23, 2011 Author Share Posted October 23, 2011 It is not a simple dress that I can easily change with accessories. I'm glad so many of you think I can wear again, but I'm still not sure. Yes, it is comfortable and attractive. I love it especially because it was $12.99! (It's cocktail length. I got it from the clearance rack at Belks. Marked down from something like $112.) This is not an occasion where icanbe snarky or want to make a bad impression. It's the yearly fundraiser for the organization DH runs. About 200 people if tickets sell well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 I would wear it again. But then I only own a handful of outfits and no dresses at all. If people really care that you wore it to the last dinner, they must be very shallow people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kiana Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 If it's a lovely dress I'd totally wear it again. And if anyone says anything, I'd say 'Yes, isn't it lovely? I'm so in love with this dress!' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Can you just accessorize it differently? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 It is not a simple dress that I can easily change with accessories. I'm glad so many of you think I can wear again, but I'm still not sure. Yes, it is comfortable and attractive. I love it especially because it was $12.99! (It's cocktail length. I got it from the clearance rack at Belks. Marked down from something like $112.) This is not an occasion where icanbe snarky or want to make a bad impression. It's the yearly fundraiser for the organization DH runs. About 200 people if tickets sell well. Well, I have already posted that I wouldn't wear it again, but now I'm wondering if you know quite a few of the people who will be at the two different events well enough to ask a few of them what they would do. You could just say that it's such a nuisance to have to shop for another dress, but you feel weird about wearing the same thing twice, and see what they say. In our little world, no one would wear the same thing twice, but since so many posters here have said they would have no problem at all wearing the same dress, it's obvious that customs are different in different areas and different groups of people, so there is really no clear-cut answer to your question, unless you ask some of the actual people who will be at both events. But if your dh is the organizer of one of the events, people are going to notice you and pay attention to what you're wearing, so if you have any doubts, I would buy a second dress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 If people really care that you wore it to the last dinner, they must be very shallow people. I'm not sure it's a matter of being shallow; I think it's more of a customary thing -- "the way things are" -- rather than "really caring" about it. They would notice, but they wouldn't say anything about it to anyone, or try to make the woman feel badly about it. Admittedly, there are a few people who would gossip about someone wearing the same dress -- but those are the kind of people who will always find something mean and catty to say, even if they have to make it up, so they aren't the people I'm talking about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 So how many clothes do you own??? Homeschool class as a weekly event... 52 outfits for that alone in one year.. where do you store them all? Storage isn't that big a deal if you have well-organized closets. Also, in my case, I would wear the same jeans/slacks/skirts more than once, but I would use different tops/sweaters/blouses and jackets, and wear different jewelry and accessories, so the outfit would always look different. I definitely don't wear something brand new every day of the week! :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MHowell Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Because your husband is the host of the event, I would get a second dress. As stated before, you will be in the spotlight because of this, and the people who saw you last week WILL NOTICE. Whether they have a life or not will have nothing to do with it. They saw you last week. If it was a month ago, two months ago even I might think about it.... but still probably not wear the dress. I know it's not the answer you wanted, but we are talking more formal events, not a weekly get together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janie Grace Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 I wouldn't. I'm totally not a clothes junkie (haha, quite the opposite) but I don't know... I would just not feel excited to be wearing the same thing within a couple of weeks, around people who already saw it. You don't feel like you're going to be the center of attention, but if your dh is organizing/running this event, you kind of are, by extension. I'd hit Belk's again. And I have to say -- I LOVE Belk's clearance! I got two very nice dresses there in Sept. for next to nothing (for a rehearsal dinner and wedding). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1GirlTwinBoys Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 I wouldn't wear the same dress twice in a row to a small gathering where you're going to see the same people. Not that you can't ever wear the dress again, just saying not twice in a row where the same people will be. :) That's just me though.;) Maybe you can have fun finding another pretty dress for a great deal.:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justasque Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Just curious: Those of you who have replied no, because people will notice: Is the implication then that people will notice and think badly of the OP? Or perhaps that it will reflect badly on her husband and/or his charity? Not being judgmental in any way to anyone here - just very curious about how different people think about repeating an outfit and what it says about the wearer. I guess what I'm asking is - some folks think that by repeating the OP might be sending a message or projecting an image she is not intending - What message could the OP inadvertently be sending (beyond the obvious "I'm wearing the same outfit twice" - what is the deeper perceived implication of that)? (My beloved extended family members include both often-repeaters and never-repeaters. I love them all!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 (edited) Just curious:Those of you who have replied no, because people will notice: Is the implication then that people will notice and think badly of the OP? Or perhaps that it will reflect badly on her husband and/or his charity? ... What message could the OP inadvertently be sending (beyond the obvious "I'm wearing the same outfit twice" - what is the deeper perceived implication of that)? OK, depending on the crowd, they could be thinking: "She can't afford to buy another dress." "She's too cheap to buy another dress." "Poor thing just doesn't know any better." "She doesn't care enough to buy another dress." "How tacky -- the same dress twice in two weeks!" Most of the people I know would probably think she just didn't understand Party Protocol, which says that you don't wear the same outfit twice. And depending on the group, I think that, yes, it could reflect poorly on her husband. It all depends on the customs of the particular group of people. Edited October 23, 2011 by Catwoman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caitilin Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 OK, depending on the crowd, they could be thinking: "She can't afford to buy another dress." "She's too cheap to buy another dress." "Poor thing just doesn't know any better." "She doesn't care enough to buy another dress." "How tacky -- the same dress twice in two weeks!" Most of the people I know would probably think she just didn't understand Party Protocol, which says that you don't wear the same outfit twice. And depending on the group, I think that, yes, it could reflect poorly on her husband. It all depends on the customs of the particular group of people. So, Cat, when you say "don't wear the same dress twice," do you mean literally NEVER, EVER twice, or just not twice within the short time frame we are talking about? I clearly don't move in circles in which this could ossibly matter. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 If Kate Middleton can do it, so can you! Go for it; I would! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternalknot Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 When in doubt, don't. It's not worth the mental stress and potential discomfort at the event (if you're the kind to wear it, then wonder all night if you should have -or if people are noticing). If you're the kind to make a decision, own it, and FTW ... that would be different and in the absence of mental stress, sure, why not?! Maybe if you set about a pre-determined period of time to shop (maybe 2-3 hours at one specific shopping center) to see if you can find anything, that'll help? If you find something, great. If you don't, you can feel you put forth a good faith effort and then decide to just go with what you have! (This is what I'd do.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfgivas Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 you mentioned that its a fund raiser. could you simply state "i donated the money i'd have spent on another dress to the fundraiser." i really really really really think that we need to change our "protocol" and way of doing things. money is a tool; we get to use it how we choose..... fwiw, ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Can you afford to go out and get another great deal like you did the first time? If you can't afford it, then don't. It's as simple as that, and no matter what we all say, if you can't afford it, you can't afford it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen in PA Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Same dress, different accessories. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldskool Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Can you afford to go out and get another great deal like you did the first time? If you can't afford it, then don't. It's as simple as that, and no matter what we all say, if you can't afford it, you can't afford it. :iagree: Lesley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 If the people who were at the previous event were all men or people who have no idea who you are, then I'd wear it again. If the people at the previous event were women who probably actually looked you up and down, then I'd look for another awesome dress sale. I am pretty down-to-earth, and I do think that people who would "say something" are shallow. However, as others have commented, you don't want to be self-conscious. You can still wear the dress again, just not at this particular event if any women attendees have noticed it on you recently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bootsie Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 OK, depending on the crowd, they could be thinking: "She can't afford to buy another dress." "She's too cheap to buy another dress." "Poor thing just doesn't know any better." "She doesn't care enough to buy another dress." "How tacky -- the same dress twice in two weeks!" Most of the people I know would probably think she just didn't understand Party Protocol, which says that you don't wear the same outfit twice. And depending on the group, I think that, yes, it could reflect poorly on her husband. It all depends on the customs of the particular group of people. I guess I run in different circles. But, I know people who would say: "She is a wise woman who doesn't seem to think it is necessary to have a new dress for every occassion." "She isn't materialistic." "She knows what looks great on her." "She has priorities that go beyond shopping all the time." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I talk to the trees Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 I guess I run in different circles. But, I know people who would say: "She is a wise woman who doesn't seem to think it is necessary to have a new dress for every occassion." "She isn't materialistic." "She knows what looks great on her." "She has priorities that go beyond shopping all the time." :iagree:I would even go so far as to say that it's "in" to be responsible and not waste money on clothes (or other items) that aren't really needed. Gosh! Who knew that dress selection could be so stressful?:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkle Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 If you like it, I say wear it. I'm all for recycling and reusing. Little Brown Dress Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bnrmom Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 To clarify, I don't mean that I don't ever repeat an outfit. I mean that week to week I will have something different on. I have kind of a rotating mental list of my favorite, go to outfits, so when I get up in the morning I already have an idea of what I might want to wear based on the weather, how lazy or energetic I'm feeling, what I'm doing that day. And then if I happen to remember that I wore that particular combo last Wed to science class, I'll pick another one. If it's been a month or so, then I would probably wear it again. I have what I would think is an average amount of clothes. Normal size closet, one dresser. Honestly, it sounds a lot more high maintenance than it is. It's almost subconscious. As for other people wearing the same outfit twice? I doubt I even notice, really, and if I do, I don't really think much about it. It's not a matter of judging someone, or even fearing that I will be judged. It's just part of how I dress. I've always done it, even back in school. I like clothes. I've always liked clothes, so maybe I think about them more than other people. But I really only spend time thinking about mine. Unless someone was wearing a really wacky or inappropriate outfit I don't remember really thinking much about theirs. Unless I am coveting something they have on, of course. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soror Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 I guess I run in different circles. But, I know people who would say: "She is a wise woman who doesn't seem to think it is necessary to have a new dress for every occassion." "She isn't materialistic." "She knows what looks great on her." "She has priorities that go beyond shopping all the time." :iagree: Yep, that is what my people would say. It is slightly beyond my comprehension that there really are people that follow those rules. I guess I'd shop the discount rack again if you didn't want to deal w/ any possible problems. How about consignment or thrift shops as well? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Where does one learn the so-called Party Protocol? I must have missed that day in class. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Where does one learn the so-called Party Protocol? I must have missed that day in class. :) I pretty much learned it by having a friend who would come out and say stuff like that to me.:tongue_smilie: I don't have to accept it, though! On a more serious note, when I was in grad school, I surprised myself by buying a thick "Miss Manners" book. I was so glad. I always felt awkward being the only person around with a humble working-class background. It wasn't that I felt inferior, just that there were little things that everyone else seemed to do instinctively. I loved the way Miss Manners says that the main point of etiquette is to make everyone else feel comfortable. Of course that doesn't exactly apply to wearing the same dress twice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 So, Cat, when you say "don't wear the same dress twice," do you mean literally NEVER, EVER twice, or just not twice within the short time frame we are talking about? I clearly don't move in circles in which this could ossibly matter. :tongue_smilie: Never, ever twice. I have rarely ever worn any type of formalwear more than once, but if I was sure that the party guests would be completely different at two events, I wouldn't have a problem with wearing the same dress twice. But with the same people? Nope. Never. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Where does one learn the so-called Party Protocol? I must have missed that day in class. :) Apparently, you never met my mother. :tongue_smilie::D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MHowell Posted October 23, 2011 Share Posted October 23, 2011 Never, ever twice. I have rarely ever worn any type of formalwear more than once, but if I was sure that the party guests would be completely different at two events, I wouldn't have a problem with wearing the same dress twice. But with the same people? Nope. Never. I think we need to remember she is talking about a cocktail dress- not formal. When I think formal I think full length, gala-type event. I would never, ever- wear the dress twice. It's part of going to these events. But I also borrow jewelry from a local shop when we have these events, so I might be thinking more over the top than what most consider the norm. Seeing as how we are truly discussing a cocktail dress, then YES, she can wear it again, but not a week later. She has already stated that the money isn't the issue, so there is no reason to not get a dress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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