A question for all the stay at home moms

[AHASRADA]

Well....I had always thought I would probably go back to formal teaching, although never full-time and never 8th grade again!! I even expected I might get my Master's in ESL and teach adults, or at least expand on the ESL tutoring I am doing currently. Aside from that, I would like to do some volunteer work, community cultural education, literacy, etc. My main priority, though, would be helping dh in whatever endeavor he would be working on at the time (he always seems to need my help and value my opinions :)), spending quality time with him, and helping my dc and any gdc in whatever capacity they need.

 

However, we now have a wonderful "caboose" blessing headed our way, which has at least changed the time-line of our post-homeschooling plans. Rather than being "done" in 8 years at age 44, I am now looking at another 18 years, retiring at age 54. Will our plans/life circumstances/goals/dreams have changed dramatically by then? I have no idea, but now it is looking too far off to think about seriously :tongue_smilie:.

[KrissiK]

I plan on going through the Master Gardeners Program and becoming.... (drumroll please) a Master Gardener!:D

[Classical Country Mama]

That thought has never crossed my mind! I added it up, and ds will graduate high school in 2027, at which time I'll be age... well, you know. A lot older than now. And that's if we don't have more kids, though sheesh, those years add up a little too fast.

 

If we're not missionaries in sub-saharan Africa before then, then that's what I'd like to do, teaching literacy and serving tea out of my very homey tent. :)

[FaithManor]

First: Sleep 30 days, take no phone calls from college students wanting money.

 

Second: Go to Denmark

 

Third: Either see if I can work at the private school I used to teach at or resume my professional pianist job if my fingers and my brain still work that well! LOL

 

However, "the best laid plans of mice and me....." and all that jazz!

 

Faith

[RanchGirl]

If we need the money, I will work to pay for college and/or retirement. But hopefully we will be done saving for those. In that case, the first thing I'm going to do the day the last one goes off to college is rent a condo with a view of the ocean and and go there and be by myself for about 3 months. After that I will continue to work part-time online enough to pay for traveling to Europe, NYC, cruises with my girlfriends, etc. I'll be caught up on scrapbooks, decorating my very clean house without things getting broken from flying footballs, volunteering, working out, and looking forward to spending time with grandbabies eventually!

[Joyofsixreboot]

I'll be 62 when last dd graduates. I predict I'll be babysitting grandbabies.

[dm379]

I have no idea! Dh will retire at the age of 39 a year before ds would be college age. We already own a house free and clear in a good area and could theoretically live off his retirement. At least according to him, he does the numbers regularly. I can not imagine the 2 of us being retired and putting up with each other 24/7 for 40 - 60 yrs. I know I'll be glad to stick to one area for a bit. I'm sick of traveling. 10 yrs. to go!

[HappyCrazyMama]

That thought has never crossed my mind! I added it up, and ds will graduate high school in 2027, at which time I'll be age... well, you know. A lot older than now. And that's if we don't have more kids, though sheesh, those years add up a little too fast.

 

If we're not missionaries in sub-saharan Africa before then, then that's what I'd like to do, teaching literacy and serving tea out of my very homey tent. :)

 

I'll be done the same year (as of now that is ;) ) and I'll be 57. I'd like to think the house would kept a little bit cleaner. :tongue_smilie: Other than that I am thinking grandchildren, hobbies, more pampering of the farm animals, perhaps I'll take riding back up, taking better care of my garden, maybe travel and things like that. Getting a job hasn't crossed my mind. I do sell Usborne Books now perhaps it will more of a career by then but perhaps not.

[TrixieB]

My plans or dh's plans? :tongue_smilie:

 

My plans would be to continue to stay home, keep the house. DH plans for me to re-enter the work force.

Same story here!

[WeeBeaks]

It would depend on the unemployment rate then frankly. My youngest is 2 months old right now, I've got a while. I will be in my mid 50s when she hits college age, so hard to tell. I do have a degree and a business background but will have been out of the workforce quite a while so that is why I say it depends a lot on the work climate. People in their 50s coming back into the work force are not exactly the most desirable of candidates for employers.

 

DH is working on getting a business going on the side while working. If that happens and is remotely successful, he will probably semi-retire early and we will combine that with our investments, travel, garden and finally spend some time together again!

[skueppers]

I have no idea! I worked happily for many years before having children, and I'm definitely not the "keeping the home" type. So I'm sure I'll be doing something, but it could just as easily be volunteer work as paid employment.

 

I'll be 55 when my younger child goes off to college, and I expect my husband to retire about 10 years after that.

[Tarreymere]

well.......the grandkids have started appearing and the youngest of my own is only 3. i will be teaching and babysitting until i am the one that needs a sitter........

[Sandy in Indy]

I'll be 60 when ds finishes school, So, no, I don't plan to re-enter the workforce.

[Pretty in Pink]

I don't know if I'm considered strictly stay-at-home now that I'm taking campus-based courses. My kids are in part-time daycare. I plan on finishing school and going to work in the next three years. We plan to continue homeschooling as well.

[Heather in OK]

I'll be able to take more clients each month and catch more babies. :)

[DarlaS]

I'll be able to take more clients each month and catch more babies. :)

 

:thumbup1: Midwives rock.

 

In case no one's mentioned that to you lately. :D

[leighp]

I have a long time still, but I want to stay home while the kids are in college. I imagine shortly after college there will be weddings to plan and then grandbabies to keep and maybe help teach. So, I have no plans of ever going back! :D

[Gwenhwyfar]

our kids are 12 & 13, so it's only 6 years until the youngest will be 18 - i"ll be 39.

 

i want to drive trucks. really really BIG trucks. :D

[dirty ethel rackham]

:thumbup1: Midwives rock.

 

In case no one's mentioned that to you lately. :D

 

:iagree::iagree: Yeah, Heather. You rock!

[silliness7]

I have tossed around every idea under the sun. What I would really like to do is have the time to be a fun grandma. So maybe a part-time job so I still have time to be grandma.

[AngieW in Texas]

My plan is to teach high school math classes that are not Saxon and high school science classes that are not religious.

[Remudamom]

We are getting close, the babies are 16. Dh says we are going to travel and go on cruises. I say we're going to do more horse stuff. And if there are grandchildren from the older kids soon, I'm not going anywhere but wherever the babies are.

 

I'm not getting a job. Dang, I'm already 52.

[sagira]

I want to get at least my Master's in Psychology and work as a developmental psychologist doing research. I also want to write, travel, take up photography full-time, and participate in dance/musical theater.

 

I'm pregnant, so when my youngest goes off to college I'll be 50.. I'd better start college sooner rather than later!

[gaillardia]

I keep thinking I'll be working so my over-worked husband can retire and tinker around in the garage. I think I'll have to go to college though. Then I think that they don't want to hire old SAHMs.

I think of having a health food store and gardening, taking care of grandchildren...and husband...

Our family has three "generations" of kids, the 20's, the teens, and the younger ones who we're are not quite calling the "littles" anymore.

[JessReplanted]

I'm going to sleep in. And take naps. And then go out for long walks. :lol:

 

Honestly, it is too far away to even think about, but I'm sure that God will show me what to do with all of that abundant time!

[Mom0012]

I may work tax seasons if we need the money, but what I'd really like to do is offer temporary foster care to newborns. I heard someone mention that they have a friend that cares for these babies during the wait period for adoption. Of course, I'd love to adopt one of these babies, but my husband and I will be too old for that by the time I would be ready to take this on.

 

If my children have children, I'm also looking forward to spoiling my grandchildren and helping them out as much as possible.

 

Lisa

[Carrie12345]

I have numerous ideas ranging from working in neuropsych to volunteering with the local animal shelters. With about 18 years left to figure it out, I'm not too worried about solidifying a plan just yet. ;)

[journeytolily]

Okay, I hate doing the math on this...but when my youngest goes off to college, I will be 65!!! So, I don't think I'll be returning to the workforce ; )

 

I WAS a career woman for over 20 yrs before becoming a mom, so I've had the experience of that - now it's all about my family.

[Dandelion]

I'll be 55, so I shall retire to Europe where I'll spend my days sipping wine and people-watching at outdoor cafes.

 

I definitely plan to do some of this... :)

 

Aside from that, I'm working on building up my life/business coaching practice right now (currently very part-time - less than 20 hours a week). I plan to expand that as the kids get older, so that by the time they graduate, I'll be working full-time (I'll be 54 when DD graduates). I also plan to spend more time writing (non-fiction) and traveling the globe with DH.

 

From a financial standpoint, I don't need to work. We're living very comfortably on the income from DH's business and our retirement funds are secure as well. However, I enjoy working and am actually looking forward to being able to work full-time again once the kids are grown.

[T Baer]

I will work while the kids are in college, but the plan for after that is for dh and me to buy a motor home and travel around the country while dh works remotely.

 

Tara

Yeah this is what I'd like to do to.

[Tutor]

We are hoping to find a small, artsy town where we can open an artists' colony. We'd like to have a dozen or so cabins scattered around and a community building. We'd provide artists with housing and work space for low rent, plan art classes, have a community garden, bring in different artists to speak, host art shows, etc. We want artists to focus on being artists and try to eliminate the "starving" description. Meanwhile, dh would like to teach in a small college and I will continue writing and photography at home and organize our little commune. Don't know if it will happen, but that's our dream. :D

[StephanieZ]

I plan to SIT ON MY REAR! LOL, that is my plan for a year at least.

 

After that, hopefully there will be kids in college to visit, grandbabies to visit, kids to help w/grandbabies, etc. My mom is 71, single, and I am sure will need more assistance as time goes on. 11 years from now, God willing, she'll be 82. She'll need more of my time.

 

I'd like to cook nicer meals, do more home projects (painting, repairs, improvements), declutter, decorate, garden more, entertain more. Make things nicer for dh & I. Travel w/ dh. Take him to lunch. Walk with my girlfriends more frequently. Exercise more. Oh, so many fun things to do.

 

When is it my youngest goes to college? 11 years! Oh, wow, that is sounding better than it did before. Maybe I am NOT so mad that dh cut off the baby supply.

 

I would go back into the workforce (more than the few hours I currently work for the family business -- which I will likely always do, and could/will have increased hours for a few months/years here or there when staffing changes occur -- as in if we lose our Office Mgr & I have to pinch hit until I get a replacement trained) if it were essential financially, but I doubt that would happen to a large extent b/c dh's earning power is so much greater than mine. He'll just work a year or two longer before retiring instead of me working FT for a decade, lol.

 

I am glad you started this thread. I am starting to look forward to 11 years from now!

[Sahamamama]

What are your plans after the kids are grown? Do you plan to stay home and continue keeping your home? Are you planning on going back into the work force? Going back to school? Other? I am just curious, I have been thinking a bunch lately about what I will do when the nest is empty.

 

For us, if we home school them out the door, that would be 15 YEARS from now.... I will be 59 years old (44 now, with young children).

 

If I'm still alive then, and Jesus hasn't come back yet, I plan to make as much $$$ as possible -- and sock away as much as possible.

 

Oh, wait a minute, we have three daughters.... hmmm..... will we have a DIME left when they leave home? :svengo:We are broke now, but we have to live off SOMETHING when the girls are grown. We need to have SOMETHING for when we're old and gray (actually, by then I will BE old and gray.... oh, no, wait, I'm old and gray NOW). :001_huh:

 

Yup, I'm going back to work, at whatever brings in the bacon.

Edited October 1, 2010 by Sahamamama

[JennyD]

I am loving this thread. And from upthread, midwives really do rock.

 

On topic: My oldest is just 5, so I will be 56 when the youngest is 18. I am going back to work (academia) part-time next year and expect to gradually ramp that up as time goes by.

 

My plan for after we both retire is to travel, swim a lot, learn new stuff myself, and hang with the grandkids. (I should note that DH gets a little twitchy when I mention that last bit. Apparently his plan is for me to pay more attention to him. :001_smile:)

[Firefly]

I loved working as a counselor before the kids were born. I fully intended to go back, but found I loved being home. I also have developed new passions that I worry I wouldn't have the time for if I were working outside the home. I'm keeping my options open, but at the moment I plan to stay home and enjoy my free time!

[LittleIzumi]

Become a midwife!!! :D A CPM.

[Evergreen State Sue]

I was glad to see I won't be the only one in my 50's. When my youngest graduates I'll be 56. At that point my dh will have at least 7 more years before retirement so I'll have to do something to keep me busy. How about sorting out all those pictures and finally finishing those scrapbooks? I worked in the corporate world for nearly 18 years before children. It would be nice to get a real paycheck again. Since my grandmother died at 52, and my mother died at 58, I think I'd like to just enjoy a slower pace into my 60's and beyond.

[SonshineLearner]

I plan on taking a "retirement party" in somewhere nice... I'm thinking Tonga right now... or perhaps Italy.. or France... for like... I don't know... a couple of months??

 

Then... I'll come back... hire someone to help me organize my house... find a part time job... and hire a housekeeper. I'll also coordinate something so tha I can pull dinner out of the freezer each night... and throw a salad together.

 

I'll think about whether I want to continue having dogs soon... as if I get another one... it will be here longer than my children. (Always pray they stay happy and healthy... but my youngest is 7...)

 

I also want to have a yard guy come and help me with a good lawn!!

 

:)

[Halcyon]

Well, I am trained as an acupuncturist and over the last few months have been working tiwards regaining my license...a few more steps and I should be there! I actually will likely begin working quite soon but just a few hours a week to 'keep my hand in it' so when my youngest goes to college (or hs if that's what we decide) I'll be 49 or 54 and able to happily work pt for a few years as an acupuncturist. Dh will be 64 at that point but sees himself working forever (works for himself in an art-related field and loves it). But hopefully I'll have more time to study Buddhism, visit friends, continue yoga and do more knitting and scrapbooking that I currently have time for!

[kalphs]

Dh and I were talking about this recently.

Presently though this seems far, far, away.

[3lilreds in NC]

Maybe we should form a "When I'm 54" group, LOL! I will also be 54 when Schmooey is 18.

 

I want to be a speech pathologist when I grow up. I've been looking into getting an online master's degree (not very hard, just out of curiousity) and I think it would behoove me to take a couple of classes at the local CC before I attempt that. The one school that seemed like the best fit requires a physical science like chemistry. I never did manage that in college.

 

My plans to pursue speech pathology were all laid out before Schmooey came along. Now, I'm not sure what I will do. If I'm going to do speech path I'd like to start that before age 54. I don't know if I will seek employment, or volunteer for stuff. I will have to keep myself busy. I hope that dh and I will get to do some stuff together, too, but it's very hard for me to picture him as retired. :) It would be fun if we could find something we liked to do together, volunteer-wise.

[livingnlearning]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3chFhCP5mQ

(Beetles: When I'm 64) (ear worm)

 

This song came to mind in reading this thread!

 

I have two potential plans, polar opposites.

 

One, I return to college and become an occupational therapist and start contributing to our poor little household income. And hopefully work on our paltry retirement savings.

 

Two, DH finally leaves the only job he's ever had, the one that has him bored stiff but is supporting all of us so securely that he doesn't dare leave it, and we buy that LQ horsetrailer/F550 that we've always wanted... throw in two riding horses and a couple pack mules and start exploring the rest of the Rocky Mountains. We live for our horses and packtrips in the summertime here and all we want to do when/if we have more time is to travel and ride, more of the same. Maybe I can do a blog of our experiences to pay for fuel; DH is a farrier...

 

We're leaning toward option two and knowing us, that's what we'll do. When we're too old for that we'll probably settle on a small farm somewhere and commence to puttering.

[JenniferB]

My dh and I own a small business, and have not saved for retirement yet, so I hope to help contribute to our old age needs by working.

 

Next summer I plan to start on-line school to finish my degree and teacher's certificate. I would like to either work in a Kindergarten or 1st grade classroom, work for a virtual academy, or start a school. I will be 52 when my youngest is 16. Most of the kids I know do Running Start at age 16. I think I'll be free enough to work full-time by then. I will have 15 years before retirement.

 

Yes, I spend a lot of time thinking about what I will do when the kids are all growed up, probably too much time. :tongue_smilie:

[MamaSheep]

I plan to continue working both in and outside my home, but I doubt that will take the form of paid employment. I think that a society structured entirely on "jobs" and "occupations" (as ours increasingly is) leaves too many gaps through which people fall. If it's not somebody's "job" to help, too often nobody does. Too often there's not enough funding to hire someone to help, or someone doesn't qualify for "the program", and there's nowhere else to turn. One of the wonderful things about being a stay at home (haha) wife and mom is that it gives me the freedom to step up when I see a "gap" and do something about it. I can't fill all the gaps I see around me, but I can fill some of them, and when my kids are not needing me so much anymore I'll be able to reach out a little more here and there. I may also choose to pursure educational opportunities, or to write or pick up my artwork again, or make quilts for exhibition, and some other things like that, that I sometimes dabble in now, and it may be that some of what I choose to do will result in some form of monetary gain, and if that happens I'll be pleased. But as long as our family can manage on one income, I think (and my dh agrees) that I can make deeper and more meaningful contributions to our family and our community by retaining control of my own time and energy so that I can spend it on things that for us are more important than bringing in a paycheck. I have seen other wonderful women do this with their lives and have seen the differences that can be made this way. I can't help but wonder what would happen in our society if we had a whole brigade of strong, intelligent, capable middle-aged women standing in the gaps. It's an effort to which I want to contribute.

[tricia]

I have a feeling that since I have 12 kids that I will be quite busy with grandkids. So, I suppose I will keep busy with them. And I look forward to it.

[BeckyFL]

I will take care of my sweet husband, darling grandbabies and nuture the older kids. I will never go back to work according to my hubby and kids. I feel I'm needed her so much more.

 

Unless God tells me differently, this is what I'm planning as well. That.... and spend plenty of time exercising so that I can keep going!

[Renee in NC]

I'll be "retiring" from homeschooling after this year. I am sitting for the CPA exam in the spring and will go back to work next summer/fall.

[Claire in NM]

take up distance running again, become a part-time "handy woman" and renovate our two out-dated bathrooms and kitchen, maintain my home-business, and enjoy the wonderful and sweet times that DH and I will have together.

 

DH retires at just about the same time the kids and I will finish home schooling. Wow, just thinking about the possibilities is exciting!

 

Claire in NM

[HS Mom in NC]

I suspect I will be taking care of my mom, step-dad, dad, and in-laws. Of those five, four live within 15 minutes of my house and the other lives 45 minutes away. They're all in their mid 60s right now and my youngest child is 5.

 

I helped take care of my maternal grandfather at my mother's house a couple of years ago as he was dying of Leukemia and now I am on call to sometimes help take care of my maternal grandmother who has Alzheimer's and is living with my mom and step-dad.

 

You would be amazed at how many doctor's appointments a relatively healthy elderly person has. Add in Alzheimer's and it's round the clock care.

[rwjx2khsmj]

I have no clue. Really, before we started homeschooling, I thought I'd be going back to work. Now, who knows.