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Who knew there was a WTM correct way to give birth?


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I didn't pass either!:lol:

 

I have had 5 natural births and 2 epidural births. One epidural birth was so easy and 2 of my natural births were so easy (same midwife delivered those 2 and she was GREAT!) The other 4? I screamed through at least some of all of them - it HURT!!!!!

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When I was pregnant with Miss Bossy, we checked out all of the birthing films to help prepare the kids for the real birth.

 

All of the women were so quiet and serene. I warned my kids that I'd be yelling, and it would be anything but serene.

 

Afterwords, my midwife told me that the women in the film had very slow labors. She said that no one had labors as fast as mine without screaming.

 

Of course, she could have just been saying that.

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I'm afraid to ask. I've done it different ways (except c-section) but the epidural was by far the easiest. I enjoyed the birth, I enjoyed holding my babies. Of course, I needed to experience 'all natural' to appreciate the epidural, but I think they're great.

 

Janet

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I've done it different ways (except c-section) but the epidural was by far the easiest. I enjoyed the birth, I enjoyed holding my babies. Of course, I needed to experience 'all natural' to appreciate the epidural, but I think they're great.

 

:iagree: The anesthesiologist is the man of my dreams, and I said that out loud w/my dh in the room. Thankfully my dh agreed because w/the epi I was pleasant, smiling...not trying to choke the life out of him or killing him with my looks. He much preferred medicated to unmedicated birth as did I. I'm glad I know what natural feels like so I know what I'm not missing...hope to have more babies but no need to feel that ever again.
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I knew I wanted meds before I even stepped foot in the hospital! My hubby was very glad lol. All three were such a joy and it was very pleasant to have such a relaxing experience. That is the beauty of choices in the country! I applaud those who don't use meds, but I am happy they are available for those of us who want them.

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no, no, it's fine to have any kind of birth you want - you're just not allowed to scream at all.

 

Oh, I think you're allowed to scream. Just make it an honest-to-goodness scream, not a fake-movie-style scream. :D

 

I thought the general comment was about how poorly birth scenes are done in movies. Did I miss something?

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I didn't scream. I am not sure what you would call it but I was loud.:lol: I had my two naturally. I do not do well carrying my girls. I am always tried and sick. But delivery, I am very lucky to have very short labors. My last was 2 and 1/2 hours from the first contraction to birth. 8 pushes and she was in my arms.

 

I think giving birth is like homeschooling. The is no right answer. You need to do what is right for you and your family.:001_smile:

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Oh, I think you're allowed to scream. Just make it an honest-to-goodness scream, not a fake-movie-style scream. :D

 

I thought the general comment was about how poorly birth scenes are done in movies. Did I miss something?

:iagree:Some women scream and some don't. Have you ever seen a movie birth without the mother screaming?

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Well I don't remember giving birth. I have not been told that I screamed, so I guess I didn't

 

I was given an injection of something. They first tried to put the needle in my arm, but missed and gave me a wonderful bruise the whole length of my arm that lasted at least 2 months. They then got the needle into the back on my hand. Once the drug was in me, I remember nothing.

 

My dh has told my that after the injection I got a big smile on my face and would not stop laughing. When he asked me what I was laughing at, I said everything was green. He then leaned in close to me, and I said that even he was green and would not stop laughing.

 

I so wish I could remember that, but alas I don't.

 

So is being so high on drugs that you don't remember the birth the right way?

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I knew I wanted meds before I even stepped foot in the hospital! My hubby was very glad lol. All three were such a joy and it was very pleasant to have such a relaxing experience. That is the beauty of choices in the country! I applaud those who don't use meds, but I am happy they are available for those of us who want them.

:iagree:

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no, no, it's fine to have any kind of birth you want - you're just not allowed to scream at all.

 

I KWYM. I didn't post in that thread since I thought it was a rather presumptuously posed question anyway.

 

But... you wanna know what? I did scream. Why? Because after 4 days of trying they finally did a c-section but the spinal block did not work properly. I let them know that by screaming. Let me tell you, feeling your own guts split open can be a little more than uncomfortable.

 

So, they can begrudge me the screaming if they want, but I'll have a few extra choice words for anyone who dares it. :glare:

Edited by Audrey
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Sounds good to me!:lol:

 

My now 16yo was present when baby #6 was born. He STILL gives me a hard time about being "high" on Stadol. That was some good stuff!:D

 

My dh still laughs at me on Stadol. That is the only drug I've ever had that made me say, "Wow, now I know why people get addicted to drugs," and "Can I have some of that to take home?" :lol:

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My dh still laughs at me on Stadol. That is the only drug I've ever had that made me say, "Wow, now I know why people get addicted to drugs," and "Can I have some of that to take home?" :lol:

 

:lol::lol::lol:

 

I tried to get them to give me some more after I had her, but they wouldn't let me. I was giggly the whole time.

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My dh still laughs at me on Stadol. That is the only drug I've ever had that made me say, "Wow, now I know why people get addicted to drugs," and "Can I have some of that to take home?" :lol:

:lol: That sounds really good! :lol:

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Sounds good to me!:lol:

 

My now 16yo was present when baby #6 was born. He STILL gives me a hard time about being "high" on Stadol. That was some good stuff!:D

 

With my first, I let a nurse bully me into pain meds...the evil Stadol...I remember it well! I was crying and asking my husband who are all these people? Why is everything pink with black spots? And WHY is everyone wearing a cowboy hat????:confused: (my eyes were closed and no one else was in the room!)

 

I list Stadol as an "allergy" now.

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I didn't scream but I also had two epidurals. When I delivered, there were no awards being given for opting not to relieve my pain. Although, I labored for over 30 hours before getting an epidural with my first. (not my choice) I'm just not a screamer though. I tend to suffer in silence. :001_smile:

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I read that thread (okay, 75 % of it), and I did not come away thinking anyone was saying there was a right way to do it. Probably those who don't scream during birthing imagine the acting must be way off. I don't see what there is to get so touchy about. On this board, if you disagree with someone, just say so.

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I KWYM. I didn't post in that thread since I thought it was a rather presumptuously posed question anyway.

 

But... you wanna know what? I did scream. Why? Because after 4 days of trying they finally did a c-section but the spinal block did not work properly. I let them know that by screaming. Let me tell you, feeling your own guts split open can be a little more than uncomfortable.

 

So, they can begrudge me the screaming if they want, but I'll have a few extra choice words for anyone who dares it. :glare:

 

Ouch -- that sounds horrible! I had a c-section with Nathan, and I cannot fathom anyone having to feel any of it. I'm so sorry for you.

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trying they finally did a c-section but the spinal block did not work properly. I let them know that by screaming. Let me tell you, feeling your own guts split open can be a little more than uncomfortable.

 

 

Holy Smokes. That's the sort of thing I was terrified of during my c-sec. I begged for general just because I was terrified. I did get a spinal and it worked, but dang, I cannot even imagine. *shudder*

 

Who wouldn't scream? I sure would.

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Holy Smokes. That's the sort of thing I was terrified of during my c-sec. I begged for general just because I was terrified. I did get a spinal and it worked, but dang, I cannot even imagine. *shudder*

 

Who wouldn't scream? I sure would.

 

I begged for a general, too. They assured me it would be fine. Well, I couldn't feel my legs at all, but the rest of me was feeling it. My dh was with me and was so horrified. They were mercifully fast getting ds out and the morphine was plentiful once he was out, but still...

 

It may be kind of mean of me, but I do tell my teenage nieces about what happened. It's my personal contribution to reducing the number of teen pregnancies.

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I read that thread (okay, 75 % of it), and I did not come away thinking anyone was saying there was a right way to do it. Probably those who don't scream during birthing imagine the acting must be way off. I don't see what there is to get so touchy about. On this board, if you disagree with someone, just say so.

 

:iagree:I agree - I posted as a screamer, and I never thought anyone was criticizing. Some who did not scream did say that they understood that screaming would make any pushing effort less effective and that is why they purposely did not scream. So, the medical community says this is true and they were just saying what they know. It was never meant as a criticism as far as I could tell.

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I begged for a general, too. They assured me it would be fine. Well, I couldn't feel my legs at all, but the rest of me was feeling it. My dh was with me and was so horrified. They were mercifully fast getting ds out and the morphine was plentiful once he was out, but still...

 

It may be kind of mean of me, but I do tell my teenage nieces about what happened. It's my personal contribution to reducing the number of teen pregnancies.

 

Too funny! But, I have to say, GOOD PLAN! :D

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Okay, I just went back to the other thread and found this quote, which I had missed before:

"FWIW, I think most women who do scream are just plain scared. I don't think it has much to do with the actual pain just their reaction to what's happening."

Now this is pretty rude...sorry. I have a very high pain threshold, am tough as nails as anyone who knows me can see...and was educated and prepared for my births as well as attended by midwives.....but I screamed bloody murder with two of them.....it had nothing to do with being scared....rude......

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I knew I wanted meds before I even stepped foot in the hospital! My hubby was very glad lol. All three were such a joy and it was very pleasant to have such a relaxing experience. That is the beauty of choices in the country! I applaud those who don't use meds, but I am happy they are available for those of us who want them.

:iagree:

 

I was absolutely numb with my first dd--couldn't feel the muscles I was supposed to push with. So I ignored the nurses & dr and squeezed my stomach instead. I had a little too much pain meds for that one.

 

With my second dd, I also got an epidural, but I could feel an "oops" when they gave it to me. I would have leapt into the air if the nurse hadn't been holding me down. I was still numbed sufficiently, except for one little area of my lower abdomen/pelvic area that wasn't affected at all. Everything went fine, though, and I'm thankful for the meds. Menstrual cramps are bad enough, so I knew I didn't want to go natural with childbirth.

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Okay, I just went back to the other thread and found this quote, which I had missed before:

 

"FWIW, I think most women who do scream are just plain scared. I don't think it has much to do with the actual pain just their reaction to what's happening."

 

Now this is pretty rude...

:iagree: Even though I didn't have pain (because of the epidural), I understand how those who don't use meds would feel enough pain to scream. If I responded to the person above (purple quotes) the way I'd like, I'd get banned.

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I read that thread (okay, 75 % of it), and I did not come away thinking anyone was saying there was a right way to do it. Probably those who don't scream during birthing imagine the acting must be way off. I don't see what there is to get so touchy about. On this board, if you disagree with someone, just say so.

 

I found this to be pretty rude. (taken from the other thread)

 

Vocalization, no screaming. I most screamers I've known are being overly dramatic. On screen, the birthing scenes that I appreciated the most were ones where they had native american women giving birth quietly.
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I read that thread (okay, 75 % of it), and I did not come away thinking anyone was saying there was a right way to do it. Probably those who don't scream during birthing imagine the acting must be way off. I don't see what there is to get so touchy about. On this board, if you disagree with someone, just say so.

 

I think the original post was pretty much saying there is a right way to do it. She was automatically dismissing anyone who screamed as being unrealistic.

 

Editing to add: One of the statements in the OP's note, "I mean, what percentage of real, actual women do that? "

 

The words real actual were the ones that offended me most. It definitely implies that screaming women are not real actual women!

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I think the original post was pretty much saying there is a right way to do it. She was automatically dismissing anyone who screamed as being unrealistic.

 

Editing to add: One of the statements in the OP's note, "I mean, what percentage of real, actual women do that? "

 

The words real actual were the ones that offended me most. It definitely implies that screaming women are not real actual women!

 

See, I don't take threads like that as she's trying to be rude. I think she really didn't think people screamed like that. All women have to do is say that they did scream like in the movies, and after a while, the OP has learned something. I think that is one of the points of dialogue. Taking offense just blocks this possible learning.

 

I remember posting something months ago about how much f**ing and such are in movies, and honestly NOT thinking that people just talked like that because I am NEVER around anyone who talks like that. I didn't start the thread to be rude -- I started it because I honestly thought movies were going off the deep end in representing how people talk. Movies and actors strive in certain ways to be realistic, and I thought they were failing in that respect. The thread taught me that I was wrong.

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As a certified childbirth educator, I teach that screaming counterproductive and tenses the muscles, but I actively encourage vocalizing, especially moaning and breathing deeply. Screaming tightens the muscles of the whole body and most of the time when someone screams there is more fear piled up and the pain-fear-tension cycle continues all over again.

 

That said, I also teach that whatever mother does during labor is not subject to be criticized, judged or put down. She can do whatever she wants. After all, she's doing the labor. I especially stress this to the dads :)

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feeling your own guts split open can be a little more than uncomfortable.

 

I couldn't feel my legs at all, but the rest of me was feeling it. My dh was with me and was so horrified. They were mercifully fast getting ds out and the morphine was plentiful once he was out, but still..

 

I'm cringing for you, Audrey. I canNOT imagine. I had two c-sections. After the 2nd, my incision got a huge infection a couple of weeks later and my doctor used a sterile q-tip (after injecting the site with some kind of anaesthetic that didn't work) to, um, pop it and clean it out - THEN I screamed and screamed. In her office. With a full waiting room. And I was biting my dh's sleeve. After I gained my composure, I had to walk out of there all hunched over again in front of all those people.

 

I do feel for you.

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Stadol wasn't fun for me. Just made me groggy and sleepy, so I told them not to give me any more (it was given several hours before ds was born). I was afraid I wouldn't be awake enough to really know what was going on and remember the birth. So I went natural.

 

If it had been more fun, I would have stayed on it for the rest of labor! :)

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