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Do you drive stupidly when your dh is in the car?


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Grrr!

 

If my dh is the passenger while I'm driving he jerks his head around, watching the roads, tells me when to go, etc, and just all around drives me nuts! I start second-guessing everything I do, and then of course I do something stupid. I'm perfectly fine when he's NOT in the car.

 

Does this happen to anyone else?

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Grrr!

 

If my dh is the passenger while I'm driving he jerks his head around, watching the roads, tells me when to go, etc, and just all around drives me nuts! I start second-guessing everything I do, and then of course I do something stupid. I'm perfectly fine when he's NOT in the car.

 

Does this happen to anyone else?

 

Only when he starts the sudden gasping. You know, the intake of breath, as if death or dismemberment are imminent.

 

One day my oldest, who is not yet driving, was correcting every single thing I did. ("Mom. Hand over hand for that turn.") Finally, I said, "You're starting make me nervous. What is up?" Then he confessed that he'd read the entire driver's manual the night before and had apparently committed it to memory. "I see. If you could not correct my every move, that would make the drive a little less stressful for us both," I said. My youngest, from the back of the van shouted, "Yeah! And anyway, you're just supposed to go [terrible, agonized gasp!] when she does something wrong."

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I hate that!! I have once or twice pulled over, gotten out of the car and refused to drive any further with my dh.....:glare:

 

Now, when he starts that kind of behavior, I ask him if he'd like to drive and that usually takes care of the problem.

 

Anne

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Grrr!

 

If my dh is the passenger while I'm driving he jerks his head around, watching the roads, tells me when to go, etc, and just all around drives me nuts! I start second-guessing everything I do, and then of course I do something stupid. I'm perfectly fine when he's NOT in the car.

 

Does this happen to anyone else?

 

Except that this happens to dh when he is driving and I am in the passenger seat ... thats why he prefers me driving.:blushing:

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This used to happen ALL THE TIME. He would tell me when to shift. He'd remind me to set the hand brake. He'd correct every little thing I did (too fast, too slow, wrong lane, etc.) I swear, every single minute of the drive he'd say something. It drove me absolutely up the wall. And, I'd start making mistakes that I normally didn't make.

 

What made it worse is that I believe I really am a better driver than he is, in may ways. I'm smoother. I don't jerk people around when I turn, or stop, or accelerate. I signal. I stop fully at stop signs. I don't tailgate. I slow down when approaching a stop (rather than accelerating, then slamming on the brakes). I slow down if there is traffic is in front of me (rather than bearing down on them because I have an aversion to using the brakes). *I* don't do any of these things.

 

ARGHHHHH! I can't even remember all the things he used to correct me about (all in the interest of making me a better driver, because (in his words), "Everyone should want to improve themselves." I almost never say anything about his driving. I just shut my eyes, and try to relax, so that if we run into somebody, I won't be all stiff, making it harder to recover. LOL.

 

Anyway, about two years ago, I got so mad I simply refused to drive with him in the car. Since then, I have only driven him on two occasions: once when he sprained his knee and had to go to the emergency room, and once when he was as sick as a dog and we were traveling, and needed to get home. I made him promise on both occasions to keep his mouth shut. He literally had to bite his tongue to keep from saying anything.

 

I don't know how long my ban on driving him will be in effect, but it has done wonders for our marriage. :)

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Grrr!

 

If my dh is the passenger while I'm driving he jerks his head around, watching the roads, tells me when to go, etc, and just all around drives me nuts! I start second-guessing everything I do, and then of course I do something stupid. I'm perfectly fine when he's NOT in the car.

 

Does this happen to anyone else?

 

Yup. Sometimes I look at him and say, "It is really amazing I have managed to drive without you for all these years!!" It drives me CRAZY when he does that and it does make me more nervous. Usually he drives, but I pick him up from work a couple days a week, and I don't really like driving him.

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I could probably run a red light and narrowly avoid hitting a tractor-trailer and my husband wouldn't bat an eye. On the other hand, being the passenger while he drives (even though he's a perfectly good driver) can set me on edge. Let's just say I like to be in the driver's seat.;)

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My dh drives 95% of the time when we are together. He doesn't actually comment on my driving, he just likes having something to do while in the car.

 

So does mine. He hand stitched two pairs of Roman socks, has made chainmail and yards of lucetted cord while sitting in the passenger seat. Funnily enough, he does go through phases of "front seat driving" but usually stops when I point out he's never had a licence!

 

:)

Rosie

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Grrr!

 

If my dh is the passenger while I'm driving he jerks his head around, watching the roads, tells me when to go, etc, and just all around drives me nuts! I start second-guessing everything I do, and then of course I do something stupid. I'm perfectly fine when he's NOT in the car.

 

Does this happen to anyone else?

 

That sounds to me like a recipe for not driving with him. His behavior is distracting. And if something that you call stupid could also be classified as dangerous, I'd stop driving with him.

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I think it must be a guy thing. I do most of the driving when the family is all together. For one, I like driving. For two, DH is an aggressive driver and I do not like that. And he's always telling me what to do, how to drive....he drives me nuts!!!!!! I'm a GREAT driver. Never gotten a ticket or anything. Yet he feels the need to warn me that the driver ahead of me is braking, or that there's a stop sign ahead, or that I need to get over in the next lane. Sometimes I just look at him and say, with as much surprise and sarcasm as I can must, "WOW....I wonder how in the world I ever manage driving around when you are not here in the car with me? I just dont know how I do it."

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I think the last time my husband sat in the passenger seat was 16 years ago, when he was teaching me to drive. If we're together, he drives and I keep my eyes on my knitting. Knitting relaxes me. :D

 

I've been married 18 years and I can count on one hand the number of times I've driven my dh anywhere. Most instances were on road trips when he needed a rest. Of course, he slept with one eye open...:auto:

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My dh wont get in a car with me. In MY opinion, that's ridiculous. In his, it's a matter of life or death. There is nothing wrong with my driving, he's just being male. I also hate to drive when he is following behind me. He critiques me when we arrive..."you took that corner too sharp", or "OK, Mario, slow down on the way home, this isn't nascar"....:auto:

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I don't drive any more stupidly, I just drive the way I drive, but yes, he make s me nuts when I drive.

If we are on a road trip and I need to drive, I prefer and have often insisted he take a nap in the 3rd seat of the suburban! I can drive thru Chicago much more calmly than he does, but he needs to be someplace other than the front seat when I am driving.

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My dh and I probably split the driving 50/50. Neither of us do the gasping, "chicken braking", offering unsolicited driving advice thing. I think he actually prefers me to drive.

 

The only time he's been known to say anything is when I "forget" that I'm in my POV and not the ambulance. He just cocks an eyebrow and says, "You know you're not on duty, right?"

 

[Nobody get their knickers in a twist -- I don't actually run red lights or drive into oncoming traffic. I just assume people will get out of my way - which is utterly ridiculous as no one gets out of my way even when I am on duty and have the whoo-whoo's on. Sigh.]

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Nope, dh doesn't say a word about my driving. Until we moved to the mountains I never said a word about his driving. He takes those curves too fast for my comfort.

 

My dh and I probably split the driving 50/50. Neither of us do the gasping, "chicken braking", offering unsolicited driving advice thing. I think he actually prefers me to drive.

 

The only time he's been known to say anything is when I "forget" that I'm in my POV and not the ambulance. He just cocks an eyebrow and says, "You know you're not on duty, right?"

 

[Nobody get their knickers in a twist -- I don't actually run red lights or drive into oncoming traffic. I just assume people will get out of my way - which is utterly ridiculous as no one gets out of my way even when I am on duty and have the whoo-whoo's on. Sigh.]

I know what you mean. There are times I still want to drive my little red Nissan pick up like it is a big red fire engine. :lol:

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I almost never say anything about his driving. I just shut my eyes, and try to relax, so that if we run into somebody, I won't be all stiff, making it harder to recover. LOL.

 

 

This is hilarious!

 

 

That's exactly what I do! Dh always drives when we're together. I keep myself from back seat driving by shutting my eyes. I have the superior driving record (no accidents or tickets compared to 3 accidents and 3 tickets in the last 3 years), so it's more about keeping the peace than who actually drives better.

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Nope.

 

We both enjoy driving & our usual rule of thumb is that one of us drives TO a place and the other drives HOME.

 

The only thing is that dh has been taking transit to work for over 20 years now & he's totally not used to driving in traffic; he's lost that "aggressive driving" edge.

 

He's fine in the city on weekends but on the odd time that he's driving there during a weekday, I'm the one who want to mutter.

 

Things like "Honey, if I were that person, I'd be flipping you the bird." and "Um, you might want to go a bit quicker. Quicker. Quicker. Oh for the love of.... you could have made that light!" I think I usually manage to bite my tongue though......

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This definitely helped to read.

 

I am the better driver. I'm the one who knows how to drive in snow. He's spun us around on the ice, fallen asleep at the wheel, etc.

 

We've both agreed that when we're 65 we're moving to a small town somewhere warm and giving away our car all together.

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Sort-of related....

 

A few years ago, a friend of mine said that whenever her family played the game of Life, her kids (and always her dds) put the guy in the driver's seat of the car. Every single time. She said that was a real eye-opener because she drove the kids around a lot -- when she was the only adult. But, when her dh was along, he always drove.

 

So in the interest of equal opportunity driving, be sure to model that moms can drive while dads ride. :D

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