When the babies won’t sleep …

[denarii]

If she can pump I'd take the twins for a minimum of four hours and just let her sleep. One four hour stretch will not tank her supply and I found when I could get four hours of uninterrupted sleep it was glorious. 

She is doing good. Honestly, I felt like I was going to drown until my twins were 2 months old.

Please don't dismiss her fears around safe sleep. I had someone do this to me and it didn't ease my anxiety when nothing terrible happened, it made me more anxious, less trusting, and less willing to ask for help. 

[Ann.without.an.e]

13 minutes ago, denarii said:

If she can pump I'd take the twins for a minimum of four hours and just let her sleep. One four hour stretch will not tank her supply and I found when I could get four hours of uninterrupted sleep it was glorious. 

She is doing good. Honestly, I felt like I was going to drown until my twins were 2 months old.

Please don't dismiss her fears around safe sleep. I had someone do this to me and it didn't ease my anxiety when nothing terrible happened, it made me more anxious, less trusting, and less willing to ask for help. 

i’ve offered this so many times and she’s so afraid of tanking her supply. She doesn’t feel like enough milk is transferred with pumping alone. I’ve begged her to let me bottle feed one round so she can sleep. I even said for her to get up at three hours and just pump and go back to bed and she was unwilling. 
 

I don’t minimize her fears because I honestly don’t know. I didn’t seek to cosleep. I’m pretty sure I resorted to it some with #3 because she was clingy too. But I never purposefully sought it out. I’ve told her to trust her mama gut on it. 

[Paige]

3 hours ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

So here’s the question too - would it be unsafe to sleep in a twin carrier if their face is not covered or at risk for that? If she’s semi propped up and not laying flat?

she felt so in tune with their breathing that way too. Exactly how unsafe is it? 

I'm not sure what her twins look like in the carrier, but with mine, I couldn't use the twin carriers because they did not look safe in them. Maybe it would have been ok when they were bigger, but it seemed to me that the twin carriers had the babies' chins to their necks (unsafe) more easily. With my single babies, I could easily get them in carriers with their heads in a safe position but I never felt safe with the twins. It could have been me and my body not providing enough support. I never tried when they were bigger because my back couldn't take it. I could do one baby in the carrier and one in the stroller. She could try getting a stroller safe for newborns and carrying one while she pushes the other back and forth in the house. We were told to absolutely not use the car seat to sleep in when they were really small. It was safe for short rides but not a long sleep while they were so small. I had the baby hammock mentioned above. It was bought out of desperation. Maybe it helped? Really just getting older helps the most. 

She's lucky- we didn't have any help with the babies. I couldn't have survived without cosleeping. I had a u shaped body pillow that I wrapped around myself, then I would sleep with the babies flat on their backs (and mine) with one in the crook of each arm. They weren't actually on the body pillow at all- it was under my arms to hold them up. No blankets, but I did have a light sheet. I really couldn't move or roll when in position like that and they couldn't move or roll either. All of us on our back....I guess the L&D nurses would say it's unsafe but sleeping is necessary too! DH left for military training when they were less than 2 months old and I was alone w/ a 2yr old as well. She will have to learn to balance risks. There's a risk with co sleeping- but there's also benefits and risks related to being dangerously sleep deprived. When they got to be a little older they were far better sleepers than my first and would go to sleep easily in a tight swaddle if I put them in their crib.

[Clarita]

1 hour ago, Clarita said:

Slowly means taking 30secs+ per movement of putting the baby into the crib.  

For my clingy baby the most important part was I'd place her in the crib with both my hands still on her in holding position 30 sec wait. Slide the hand underneath her out (so one hand on tummy one hand barely touching the top of her head) wait 30sec. Remove hand from her tummy to just barely touching wait 30 sec... Continue until you get to the amount of independence you want for the baby. Whether that is mother completely out of the room or whatever feels comfortable for mom. If at any point the baby starts a little fuss you go back to the last postion, big fuss then comfort the baby.

I have to be honest at about 3-4month I co-slept with her until she was a little bit over 1 years old. I got the slowly letting go thing to get her sleeping for an hour or two so I had some non-baby time before I slept the rest of the night with her. Before 3months it was a mixture of sleep sack swaddle and having my hand on her while she was in the bassinet the whole night. 

I also know some people who dismantle their bed so it's just a mattress on the ground and either have the baby in a crib with an opening or just put the baby mattress on the ground to co-sleep "safely" in that way. How you really configure that will have a lot to do with what the mother is comfortable with. Twins make this harder in terms of logistics for sure but maybe this can spur some ideas for you. 

[Clarita]

35 minutes ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

i’ve offered this so many times and she’s so afraid of tanking her supply. She doesn’t feel like enough milk is transferred with pumping alone. I’ve begged her to let me bottle feed one round so she can sleep. I even said for her to get up at three hours and just pump and go back to bed and she was unwilling. 

For my singleton, I think it would have been more stressful for me to pump than to just nurse the baby. 

I know some friends would nurse the babies but mother goes to sleep immediately after nursing and helper is in charge of getting the baby for nursing and putting the baby back to sleep.

[Katy]

I’ve had babies (2-3 at a time, but not siblings) with reflux stay with me. I was legally required to put them to sleep in a crib. Doctors would recommend an incline but refused to write a prescription so I could do it legally. In one case a baby had an NG tube AND reflux. 

I found what was best was feeding, walking them around until they were calm but not sleepy (which sometimes took 2 hours), changing them & putting them in a swaddle-up (a brand of swaddle sold at Target that keeps their hands near their faces to self-sooth, and it zips shut to keep them in), and quietly putting them in their crib awake but calm. Walk out. Go to bed. Don’t go back for a whimper or a mew, give it a minute to see if it becomes a full blown cry or if they’re just doing the new baby version of talking. 
 

I think in her case I would try to have her sleep as much as possible during the day (when you can help) and plan on being up more at night. 

[rebcoola]

I have not been in your daughter situation at all but my kids have all slept in their bassinet/crib.

  Swaddle if the one is kicking it off try a different style idk if you are using blankets or store bought but their are several different ones either way. 

 Babies fall asleep while nursing. I always wake my babies before laying them down so  they aren't startled awake when they notice the change.

 A fan provides air movement which lessens SIDS and adds white. 

Only go in for a real fuss babies move and make noise doesn't always mean they are awake

 

Edited March 24, 2023 by rebcoola

[freesia]

Swaddling is what worked the best—the tight swaddle from The Happiest Baby on the Block. 
 

The next thing I’m going to say is coming from a place of empathy and concern and from my experience. Totally disregard or ignore if you want. I struggled with anxiety after my births and I see a lot of myself in what you’ve shared of your dd. My cousin lost a child to SIDS, so I get her concern and I know she is completely exhausted. I’m wondering if she is also experiencing some postpartum depression or anxiety. I totally rationalized it in myself, and really wished I hadn’t. At least encourage her to stop googling things. Everything she will do has risks. ❤️ mama. You are wonderful for being there for her. 

[Hilltopmom]

The best swaddles I used were the zip up ones with or without the extra piece that Velcroed around their middle. They were magic for all of the foster babies we had who we couldn’t co sleep with.

[Ann.without.an.e]

As always, thank y’all ❤️

I gave them their first real bath today 😊

ETA: this was dd’s request. Twins are overwhelming. I remember it was a big memorable event with dd but then with twins it’s just like “get it done” 

 

 

edited again to add nectarine 

 

 

Edited March 24, 2023 by Ann.without.an.e

[prairiewindmomma]

Cute!

They are looking more like term babies—fuller cheeks and the beginnings of baby pudge. 🙂 Hopefully you are past the crisis of getting calories in.

[Ann.without.an.e]

1 minute ago, prairiewindmomma said:

Cute!

They are looking more like term babies—fuller cheeks and the beginnings of baby pudge. 🙂 Hopefully you are past the crisis of getting calories in.

 

I think we are and fingers crossed. They have a weight check on Monday and they moved it last minute from the ped we like (who will be more chill about it) to a NP I don’t know. Hopefully she’s ok 

[KSera]

5 hours ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

So here’s the question too - would it be unsafe to sleep in a twin carrier if their face is not covered or at risk for that? If she’s semi propped up and not laying flat?

she felt so in tune with their breathing that way too. Exactly how unsafe is it? 

They would be much safer in safe co-sleeping environment, unless she is awake while they are in the carrier and that seems to defeat the purpose right now. Sleeping propped in a chair with a baby is a lot higher risk than safe co-sleeping (firm, flat mattress, no pillows or blankets anywhere near, no drugs or alcohol).

 

3 hours ago, Mrs Tiggywinkle Again said:

That said, the ONLY way my preemie would sleep was next to or on me(or dad).  I never took meds, don’t do drugs, and didn’t touch alcohol while breastfeeding. I removed the extra pillow and blankets, and baby and I co-slept.  

At that point, the risks of co sleeping were less than the risks of me snapping because I had no sleep, a husband working 24+ hour long shifts, and three kids under 5.

This. The strict, absolutely never ever co sleep no matter what you do to make it as safe as possible leads people to do much more dangerous things (sleeping with baby on a couch or in a recliner or driving around with a baby while exhausted).

3 hours ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

you know I say that but she doesn’t seem to have anxiety when she isn’t sleep deprived? Like yesterday she was great because she got sleep (them in the carrier). I’m trying to help some but I also don’t want to be there every night since DSIL wants to help and feels bad if I’m there too much at night but he is a deep deep sleeper and doesn’t wake up. 

With him being a very deep sleeper and there being two babies, he should be in a different bed if she is going to sleep with the babies next to her.

3 hours ago, Clarita said:

Essentially you take placing them in the crib and leaving the room sssllllloooowwllly and you can take this however far you want, like you don't have to leave the room ever if that's not what is practical.

Since we're talking safe sleep practices, leaving them to sleep in a room alone increases the risk of SIDS.

 

An idea that might help with her anxiety about SIDS (which I totally get! I worried about it with every single one of mine and was constantly checking to make sure they were breathing) would be one of the monitors that alarms if a baby stops breathing. I know that they are discouraged because there is this idea that parents will rely in it as a SIDS preventative (and not...what? I'm not sure what they are afraid parents will not do if they are using one of these), but for a parent that is very worried about their babies stopping breathing, it can help ease some of that by allowing them to see or hear (depending on the device) that baby is breathing and not feel a need to constantly check. It's not like a parent is doing a wrong thing by not continually fretting that their baby is still breathing, so I think it's a net benefit in situations like this. It was for me (ours went off a few times with our last baby).

 

eta: I'm sorry the sleep is hard now! Most of mine were like this and would not sleep without being right next to me and I just don't know what I would have done if there had been two of them! Most of mine screamed in the car as well, so even that wasn't an option. Oh, and on that, some reflux babies are more uncomfortable in an infant "bucket" style car seat and do better in a rear facing convertible. Fortunately, some of those go down to weights small enough for preemies now.

Edited March 24, 2023 by KSera

[Ann.without.an.e]

Do y’all see a theme with the towels? 😂

I got one when dd found out she was pregnant. They called the baby nectarine and then when we found out it was two, I had to search four tj max’s but finally found one more. 

[Halftime Hope]

3 hours ago, prairiewindmomma said:

Then can you do afternoon drives every day after a feeding so mom can get an unbroken three hours in? I really think mom sleeping is going to help…but I also would just keep my eyes open. A few friends had low level anxiety they always lived with and could stay rational about things when life was low stress (didn’t realize they were anxious inherently), but then things fell apart postpartum. Two were able to do just meds at home, but one needed more help.

Postpartum hormonal adjustments + sleep deprivation are pretty known triggers….

One of my family had this. It got worse cumulatively, and the mother needed help several months in. Not being able to sleep fed the anxiety, and then it spiraled. 

[Clarita]

48 minutes ago, KSera said:

Since we're talking safe sleep practices, leaving them to sleep in a room alone increases the risk of SIDS.

Yes, I just didn't want to add more fire. My pediatrician said that studies show for the first 6 months of life the "safest" practice was to sleep in the same room with the infant. Apparently after 6 months there was no longer increased safety from sleeping with them in the same room. The speculation is either that babies aren't sleeping as soundly with another person in the room and/or with close proximity parents can sense better when something isn't right.

It's a hard balance between exhaustion and what is statistically the "best" for babies.

[Terabith]

The fact of the matter is that all of the "safe sleep" practices are centered around making sure that babies do not sleep very deeply.  And....safety is important.  But it's not safe for babies to be cared for by a severely sleep deprived mother.  Sometimes, I think, personally, making the perfect the enemy of the good is counter productive, and with both of my kids, I chose to create the safest co sleeping situation possible so that everyone could get the most sleep possible.  For many months, that also involved my husband sleeping in a different room, and me sleeping with a baby in my bed (with no extra blankets or pillows, mattress on the floor).  

[Ann.without.an.e]

Thanks y’all. 
 

To be more clear, the type of carrier is very different than any I’ve seen and it isn’t a wrap style where the baby is tucked down inside fabric. It’s specifically for twins and for smaller babies too. It holds their head in place so it doesn’t fall chin to chest and their head is up out of the carrier. 

[KungFuPanda]

My 5 week old grandson wants to be held all the time. His parents are exhausted and there’s just one of him. His bassinet vibrates but he hates it. He will sometimes nap in his swing. What he does love is this little vibrating walrus thing, but he wakes up when it stops vibrating so they have to sneak in and turn it back on. 
 

Maybe ease your daughter in to a break? See if she’ll take a two hour nap. Try three hours the next day. It’s hard to make good decisions when you’re hormonal and sleep deprived. 

[Elizabeth86]

5 hours ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

As always, thank y’all ❤️

I gave them their first real bath today 😊

ETA: this was dd’s request. Twins are overwhelming. I remember it was a big memorable event with dd but then with twins it’s just like “get it done” 

 

 

edited again to add nectarine 

 

 

Aww so cute. How cute are the towels!! How old are they now? I’ve lost track.

[Not_a_Number]

I just coslept. I’m a really light sleeper and nothing ever happened that made me the least bit worried. And I wouldn’t have been safe to have around on no sleep.

And we sleep trained when the cosleeping stopped working and the kids were big enough.

No regrets about either decision.

ETA: just to be clear, I didn't have twins, so no experience there. Only singleton babies who didn't sleep, lol.

Edited March 25, 2023 by Not_a_Number

[alysee]

This may be controversial but the best thing someone did for me was to take the babies for a 3 hour stretch once a day. It should come as no surprise but it was my MIL who did this. I was heading towards PPA because of the exhaustion. I protested the first 4 days worried it would deplete my milk but it didn't and I ended up being much more clear headed after that and welcomed it. You cant think straight with your hormones and lack of sleep. 

[Ann.without.an.e]

10 hours ago, Elizabeth86 said:

Aww so cute. How cute are the towels!! How old are they now? I’ve lost track.

They are 4.5 weeks now 😊

[Ann.without.an.e]

I gave her an ultimatum … her mental health cannot continue to run on zero sleep. She cannot continue as is without worse risk to her and babies. 
She needs to ….

Get the safe cosleeping book by McKenna and we’ll get her a mattress for the nursery floor 

let us take them for one round of feedings and we’ll bottle feed 

use the cry it out method until they learn to just sleep and not cry so much (not my favorite but I know some people swear by it) 

She can’t continue as is and she agreed and she’s thinking on it all. We’ll see 

 

ETA: I don’t actually recommend cry it out and she knows that. Please read my other reply below lol

 

 

Edited March 25, 2023 by Ann.without.an.e

[Arcadia]

26 minutes ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

 

use the cry it out method until they learn to just sleep and not cry so much (not my favorite but I know some people swear by it) 

Personal opinion - crying increases gas/bloat for babies. I won’t risk it for my relatives because we tend to bloat easily from gas. DS17 can wail for hours 🤦‍♀️ Even my in-laws admit that method can’t work for him.

[Not_a_Number]

I wouldn't try CIO with newborns, personally, but you're absolutely right to tell her that this can't go on as is. Sleep is an essential human need. 

[Ann.without.an.e]

14 minutes ago, Arcadia said:

Personal opinion - crying increases gas/bloat for babies. I won’t risk it for my relatives because we tend to bloat easily from gas. DS17 can wail for hours 🤦‍♀️ Even my in-laws admit that method can’t work for him.

 

12 minutes ago, Not_a_Number said:

I wouldn't try CIO with newborns, personally, but you're absolutely right to tell her that this can't go on as is. Sleep is an essential human need. 

 

I only put that as an option because I know she’d never do it 😂😂

ETA: she knows CIO was the method we were pushed to when we were new parents. She knows we regretted it with her and eventually tossed it and wished we hadn’t been pushed that direction by others who said we’d spoil her if we rocked her. So it is almost offered as an inside joke but also to emphasize even it (as bad as it is) is a better option than your sleep deprivation right now. 

Edited March 25, 2023 by Ann.without.an.e

[Arcadia]

5 minutes ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

I only put that as an option because I know she’d never do it 😂😂

That make sense. I was thinking more of if other people suggest that method. When one baby cry, the other(s) tends to join in solidarity 🤣 My husband’s sister who has twins has a good sense of humor thankfully. My dad side is large so a cacophony of babies and toddlers wailing is part and parcel of our lives.

[math teacher]

I'm glad she is opening up to a solution. I hope she will get some rest soon. My personal advice, given the choices, would be to order the things you have listed, then let others take a shift until the products come in.

[Alice]

On 3/24/2023 at 12:33 PM, kbutton said:

I have horrible, no good, very bad thoughts about a lot of the safe sleep recommendations, lol! I don't wish crib death on anyone, but I think that we place far too much pressure on parents to be superhuman and live without sleep, which is not safe either. This stuff is a lot of why we stopped having kids when we did. Recommendations were not completely feasible with the children we were given. They weren't happy; we weren't happy. No one was happy. It was awful, and I wish I had fond memories of when mine were little, but they are nearly nonexistent. 

 

 

19 hours ago, Clarita said:

Yes, I just didn't want to add more fire. My pediatrician said that studies show for the first 6 months of life the "safest" practice was to sleep in the same room with the infant. Apparently after 6 months there was no longer increased safety from sleeping with them in the same room. The speculation is either that babies aren't sleeping as soundly with another person in the room and/or with close proximity parents can sense better when something isn't right.

 

 

I went to a lecture by one of the people on the AAP committee who wrote the new guidelines that recommend babies stay in the room up to 6 months (I'm a pediatrician). One of the other doctors in the room raised their hands and asked "Does anyone on the committee actually have children or actually work in a clinical setting with new parents?" The entire room applauded. The poor woman giving the lecture kind of hemmed and hawed and said that they know it's tough but evidence shows it's safer, etc. Most pediatricians I know hate that guideline. Whoever above said that the guidelines all stem from making sure babies don't sleep as deeply which seems to help prevent SIDS is absolutely right. But I think we've lost some common sense. I mean we could also tell people with older kids that to absolutely protect them from accidents you should stay with your child 100% of them and literally never take your eyes off them. Yes, it would prevent a lot to accidents, but it would be crazy. 

I think a lot of the safe sleep measures make sense and it's good to follow them but all babies are different and parents are different and sometimes you just have to do what you have to do to survive. The biggest preventive measures in my mind are not smoking, sleeping on the back (a huge decrease in SIDS after this was implemented), and sleeping on a safe surface. The last one is tricky and I think as pediatricians when we just say that the only safe sleep method is alone in a crib/bassinet in the parent's room until 6 months people just lie to us about what they are really doing and then we can't talk about ways to be "safer" but not maybe "safest". 

I'll also say that at a dinner recently with a bunch of pediatricians from my office (whose kids range in age from 30's to 6 months old) EVERY single one said we had at some point slept with at least one of our kids for some period of time. I slept with all three of my kids on and off, I never really wanted to co-sleep but they all needed the comfort for sleep. I knew the risk and was wiling to take it so that we could get some sleep...I knew I don't drink or take meds that make me very sleepy, our mattress was safe, I didn't use pillows near the baby, etc. I like to tell parents that sleep and feeding are very cultural and within certain basic safety guidelines (don't give a four month old a whole grape, don't put a two month old face down on a soft pillowy mattress) it really doesn't matter what you do and it's more about your parenting/family style. 

 

[Ann.without.an.e]

21 minutes ago, Alice said:

 

 

I went to a lecture by one of the people on the AAP committee who wrote the new guidelines that recommend babies stay in the room up to 6 months (I'm a pediatrician). One of the other doctors in the room raised their hands and asked "Does anyone on the committee actually have children or actually work in a clinical setting with new parents?" The entire room applauded. The poor woman giving the lecture kind of hemmed and hawed and said that they know it's tough but evidence shows it's safer, etc. Most pediatricians I know hate that guideline. Whoever above said that the guidelines all stem from making sure babies don't sleep as deeply which seems to help prevent SIDS is absolutely right. But I think we've lost some common sense. I mean we could also tell people with older kids that to absolutely protect them from accidents you should stay with your child 100% of them and literally never take your eyes off them. Yes, it would prevent a lot to accidents, but it would be crazy. 

I think a lot of the safe sleep measures make sense and it's good to follow them but all babies are different and parents are different and sometimes you just have to do what you have to do to survive. The biggest preventive measures in my mind are not smoking, sleeping on the back (a huge decrease in SIDS after this was implemented), and sleeping on a safe surface. The last one is tricky and I think as pediatricians when we just say that the only safe sleep method is alone in a crib/bassinet in the parent's room until 6 months people just lie to us about what they are really doing and then we can't talk about ways to be "safer" but not maybe "safest". 

I'll also say that at a dinner recently with a bunch of pediatricians from my office (whose kids range in age from 30's to 6 months old) EVERY single one said we had at some point slept with at least one of our kids for some period of time. I slept with all three of my kids on and off, I never really wanted to co-sleep but they all needed the comfort for sleep. I knew the risk and was wiling to take it so that we could get some sleep...I knew I don't drink or take meds that make me very sleepy, our mattress was safe, I didn't use pillows near the baby, etc. I like to tell parents that sleep and feeding are very cultural and within certain basic safety guidelines (don't give a four month old a whole grape, don't put a two month old face down on a soft pillowy mattress) it really doesn't matter what you do and it's more about your parenting/family style. 

 

Can I copy and paste this to DD?

 

thanks 😊

[Ann.without.an.e]

She’s going to try a mattress on the floor for a nap soon and if that doesn’t work then she’ll know it’s not closeness but being upright that they need. If it’s the uprightness then it means reflux most likely and she’ll need to look into that more 

[Not_a_Number]

That's great. I'm glad she's problem solving. 

[ktgrok]

On 3/24/2023 at 11:31 AM, Ann.without.an.e said:

So here’s the question too - would it be unsafe to sleep in a twin carrier if their face is not covered or at risk for that? If she’s semi propped up and not laying flat?

she felt so in tune with their breathing that way too. Exactly how unsafe is it? 

The big concern would be if their chin is tucked down to their chest - same issue in a car seat. It constricts the airway if their chin is tucked. Think how when doing CPR the first thing you do is tilt the head back to open up the airway - same idea. 

[Ann.without.an.e]

Just now, ktgrok said:

The big concern would be if their chin is tucked down to their chest - same issue in a car seat. It constricts the airway if their chin is tucked. Think how when doing CPR the first thing you do is tilt the head back to open up the airway - same idea. 

Right and this carrier doesn’t allow the head to fall? It’s made for preemies and little babies. 
If they have reflux then it may be her only safer option 

[ktgrok]

I didn't read all the responses, so maybe this was already mentioned, but there are places you can rent those crazy new fangled bassinets that rock/vibrate/etc in reaction to the babies starting to stir. They are supposed to be freaking miraculous, but are uber expensive, hence the rental idea. You could even ask around if anyone has one. Unfortunately, I cannot remember what they are called - something spelled oddly, like Sui or something? 

[ktgrok]

26 minutes ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

She’s going to try a mattress on the floor for a nap soon and if that doesn’t work then she’ll know it’s not closeness but being upright that they need. If it’s the uprightness then it means reflux most likely and she’ll need to look into that more 

Smart! I had one kid that would only sleep if I was sitting up while holding him. The ohters did want skin to skin, but laying down was fine. That one, my biggest one, had to be in my arms a certain way, with me in a chair. I slept propped up in that chair way more than was ideal - for my back or his safety or my sanity, but there really wasn't another option - we both needed sleep. 

[ktgrok]

Found it! It's the "Snoo". So I was kinda close, lol. https://www.happiestbaby.com/products/snoo-smart-bassinet?utm_source=google&utm_campaign=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwt_qgBhDFARIsABcDjOfEzCwr_mpTt0B6k59WRS2jMIB-0xb0EoCyJPeV2HJCiAMKcqMqjlIaAv7KEALw_wcB

1,600 new, but you can find them used, and like I said, I think some places rent them out?

Oh, duh! They have a rental link ON the website, lol. https://www.happiestbaby.com/products/snoo-rental

Edited March 25, 2023 by ktgrok

[Ann.without.an.e]

26 minutes ago, ktgrok said:

Found it! It's the "Snoo". So I was kinda close, lol. https://www.happiestbaby.com/products/snoo-smart-bassinet?utm_source=google&utm_campaign=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwt_qgBhDFARIsABcDjOfEzCwr_mpTt0B6k59WRS2jMIB-0xb0EoCyJPeV2HJCiAMKcqMqjlIaAv7KEALw_wcB

1,600 new, but you can find them used, and like I said, I think some places rent them out?

Oh, duh! They have a rental link ON the website, lol. https://www.happiestbaby.com/products/snoo-rental

The price on that thing is insane right 

[ktgrok]

1 hour ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

The price on that thing is insane right 

Completely! But I do hear they are amazing and if one has the money and is desperate I could see how they get sold. 

[itsheresomewhere]

56 minutes ago, ktgrok said:

Completely! But I do hear they are amazing and if one has the money and is desperate I could see how they get sold. 

So there is one of those floating around my local yard sale group. It keeps getting re-listed.  So far every ad starts with a version of this “ This is supposed to be the miracle I was looking for and my child hates it”.  This one keeps selling for a ridiculous price and people keep buying it. 

[Halftime Hope]

So one of my offspring got the snoo; it was all the rage among the peer group/co-workers. There was also PPD in the mix, but I think it stemmed more from the mama's own wiring rather than from a baby who wouldn't sleep, because the mama is reputed to sleep just like one of her parents: the slightest noise, and that's it for the night. No more sleep for mama.

Anyway, the baby slept in the snoo from birth, and it didn't do much for the baby--all kinds of wakefulness--until the parents had a sleep coach come in when baby was 5 months old, and from that time on, the baby would sleep 12+ hours straight without any parental involvement during that time.  I don't know at what age they stopped using swaddle in the snoo. 

I nursed and co-slept with all my children, because it was the easiest thing to do; it's where we all got the most sleep. So I keep my mouth entirely shut on baby-raising.

[Clarita]

5 hours ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

use the cry it out method until they learn to just sleep and not cry so much (not my favorite but I know some people swear by it) 

You don't have to go whole hog CIO either. There is a range to CIO. You can do it so babies can learn to sleep on their own but also not leave them to cry until they are hoarse or vomiting. It can involve putting limits to how much crying/fussiness you'll tolerate before going in to comfort.  I actually technically did CIO with both my kids. It gave my husband and I some adult time before I retired to the baby's room to sleep the rest of the night.   

I mostly followed the CIO method outlined in the Ferber sleep book. I think I maxed out at letting my babies fuss/cry for 15min (the book I think maxes out at 20 or 25min). Also you'd do it only for 1 week then you take whatever gains you can get from that 1 week and you wait a a few months before trying it again. Of course like all things I do, I wasn't purist about it, anyway the book says "something is only a problem if it's a problem for you." So , I would snuggle my kids to sleep and I never did find that elusive almost asleep but not totally asleep sweet spot. I'd put my eldest in his crib alseep with a quiet "Goodnight see you tomorrow." With my youngest she was a little more clingy, so I did the ssssllllloooowwwwlllyy put her down deal with a whispered "Goodnight." My delay going in was really just a deep breath in front of the door so I'm relaxed before going in to tend to the babies.

[Clarita]

MY husband totally wanted the snoo for himself (not the baby). Another issue I heard with the snoo is that it's really a super short time you can use it, because the babies physically grow out of it really quick. 

 

[Lucy the Valiant]

When my twins were new, they strongly preferred to be swaddled TOGETHER - aka, swaddle Baby A, then swaddle Baby B, then put them shoulder-to-shoulder on their backs and tightly tuck a blankie so they're "tucked" right next to each other. I initially worried that then one would wake the other, but I can't count the number of times I'd go in there, and one would be wailing while the other would be sound asleep. ❤️ 

(YMMV, just sharing ideas.)

[Momof4sweetkids]

I'm one that's too nervous to cosleep and we use Halo brand Velcro swaddles and love them. I even have some in my hospital bag for baby #4 because I've never been able to swaddle well with a blanket.

[Ann.without.an.e]

19 minutes ago, Momof3sweetgirls said:

I'm one that's too nervous to cosleep and we use Halo brand Velcro swaddles and love them. I even have some in my hospital bag for baby #4 because I've never been able to swaddle well with a blanket.

 

we swaddle in a similar Velcro swaddle but they are both so unhappy. This just started this week. They cry and cry until picked up and held chest to chest.

[Clarita]

36 minutes ago, Ann.without.an.e said:

we swaddle in a similar Velcro swaddle but they are both so unhappy. This just started this week. They cry and cry until picked up and held chest to chest.

You can try the nested bean swaddle it has a bean sack on the tummy to simulate a snuggle. I would hold them close to my chest first to get the sack warmed up then when I lay my baby girl down have my hand be the last thing that leaves the bean sack.

[Pippen]

On 3/24/2023 at 10:17 AM, Ann.without.an.e said:

Yes to the swaddles but sometimes little bit now kicks it off but not always 

My mom made me oversized cotton blankets for swaddling that stayed in place better than the typical size. Thin cotton, like sheets, so baby didn't get so  overheated. 

[rebcoola]

Yes we had huge thin swaddled and did the boat swaddle that worked really well.