My kids bought a house

[Scarlett]

My son and his wife. It is a very nice 2000 sf, 1 1/2 story on a lovely dead end street. It has been completely redone from top to bottom.  Best of all it is 2 miles from us. 

They closed today.  We had helped them move about 90% of their belongings into the new home garage 10 days ago. Today was still pretty stressful on them cleaning out the apartment, loading up the dogs and crates and driving to our town.  The apartment complex was threatening them and making DIL especially so afraid because they could not be out on the day they originally gave for notice.  I am really disgusted by the way they were treated by that complex.  They lived there for 3 years and never was late on rent even through Covid.  
 

But it is over now. 

[Lecka]

Exciting!!!!!

 

Boo about the apartment complex, though, that is ridiculous!!!!!!

[Scarlett]

I have actually never seen anything like it.  They gave their notice first of July and said they would be out August 6. Mid July they realized that wouldn’t happen and notified the office…….the response? Sorry you have to turn in your keys by 5 p.m on the 6th. Your unit up has been leased.  
 

My DIL completely freaked out.  She had some kind of flight response to their response……I carefully explained that there are laws that protect tenets and it did not matter what they said they had to go through due process to evict them…and that was the worse case. But it was pretty bad.  

[Kassia]

Great news about the house!  Terrible about what led up to now but hope they are very happy in their new home and glad they will be nearby.

[Bambam]

8 hours ago, Scarlett said:

I have actually never seen anything like it.  They gave their notice first of July and said they would be out August 6. Mid July they realized that wouldn’t happen and notified the office…….the response? Sorry you have to turn in your keys by 5 p.m on the 6th. Your unit up has been leased.  
  

Congratulations on the new house - and nice that it is so close to you guys! 


I don't understand why this is an issue. You give notice you are vacating an apartment? The leasing company can and will find a new tenant based on that info.  My youngest rented an apartment, with a signed lease, back in early July for an apartment starting August 20th (three days before her college classes start). People had given notice in writing they were not renewing the lease and would be gone. I will be furious if the old tenant is still there and she can't move it. And it will seriously cramp her starting school and cause us serious added expense.  There are two sides to every leasing story. 

We had a very hard time finding her an affordable apartment in a decent neighborhood. The less expensive ones in decent neighborhoods do not have availability until 2023 - if then. Reasonable priced apartments around here are hard available for leasing. The expensive ones ($1400+ for a one bedroom + utilities) have much more availability. 

Edited August 17, 2022 by Bambam

[Scarlett]

15 minutes ago, Bambam said:

Congratulations on the new house - and nice that it is so close to you guys! 


I don't understand why this is an issue. You give notice you are vacating an apartment? The leasing company can and will find a new tenant based on that info.  My youngest rented an apartment, with a signed lease, back in early July for an apartment starting August 20th (three days before her college classes start). People had given notice in writing they were not renewing the lease and would be gone. I will be furious if the old tenant is still there and she can't move it. And it will seriously cramp her starting school and cause us serious added expense.  There are two sides to every leasing story. 

We had a very hard time finding her an affordable apartment in a decent neighborhood. The less expensive ones in decent neighborhoods do not have availability until 2023 - if then. Reasonable priced apartments around here are hard available for leasing. The expensive ones ($1400+ for a one bedroom + utilities) have much more availability. 

The real problem here is the complex who did not allow sufficient turn over time. Things happen. It is VERY common in buying a house for the closing date to be delayed. And considering the law is on the side of the tenant, the complex is just setting themselves up for failure by cutting it so close. 
 

Their closing date was only delayed by one week. 

[Bambam]

21 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

The real problem here is the complex who did not allow sufficient turn over time. Things happen. It is VERY common in buying a house for the closing date to be delayed. And considering the law is on the side of the tenant, the complex is just setting themselves up for failure by cutting it so close. 
 

Their closing date was only delayed by one week. 

Yes, we've purchased several houses and closings can be delayed.  We've always tried to make sure we have a couple of weeks - month overlap to allow for delays + less stressful moving. 

But a new tenant who signs a lease in good faith to have that apartment starting on their lease date - they have no rights because the previous tenant didn't calculate their move out date properly? I don't even want to estimate the financial cost to us if that apartment isn't available for another week. Plus the stress to the college student and her parents who will be scrambling to find alternate temporary lodging. 

 

[Scarlett]

3 minutes ago, Bambam said:

Yes, we've purchased several houses and closings can be delayed.  We've always tried to make sure we have a couple of weeks - month overlap to allow for delays + less stressful moving. 

But a new tenant who signs a lease in good faith to have that apartment starting on their lease date - they have no rights because the previous tenant didn't calculate their move out date properly? I don't even want to estimate the financial cost to us if that apartment isn't available for another week. Plus the stress to the college student and her parents who will be scrambling to find alternate temporary lodging. 

 

Well I guess the person renting a new apartment could also plan to have padding on their end. 

[cjzimmer1]

6 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Well I guess the person renting a new apartment could also plan to have padding on their end. 

But why should they?  It's not their responsibility to be able to guess when previous tenants move out or how long it takes to flip an apartment between renters.  I know you probably don't want to hear this, but the fault definitely lies with your kids for not allowing enough time between ending their rental and getting moved.  Buying a house is seldom without snags, they should have had a couple of weeks overlap, thus when closing changed they wouldn't have caused havoc for themselves, the rental company and the future renter.

[Pamela H in Texas]

CONGRATS! That's very exciting!

 I totally understand that it took longer than expected.  However, I agree that the new tenant should have been able to move in as planned.  DS and DIL should have padded their time accordingly.  I wish we had when we bought our home and closed a few days late.  It ended up meaning we couldn't clean properly due to a mix up regarding utilities.  But had we planned better, that wouldn't have happened.  I think its common to hope a little too hard that things will time correctly.  I also think its common for closing to be later than planned.  And I think its the buyers job to pad the rental date appropriately.  Like I said, I wish we had.  I think its a common mistake but unfair to the new tenants (if there are any; there wasn't in our case).  

[Soror]

Congratulations to them! I hope the rest of the move goes off smoothly.

[Annie G]

Congrats to your kids on their first house!

Apartment renting is very different than when I was renting in the 80’s. Dd and her husband moved from one apartment to another this month and the new apartment has been vacant since they first looked at in June.  Their old apartment demanded that they vacate by noon on the last weekday of July, and the new place wouldn’t give them keys until 2 PM on the 1st.  Weird. 

[Scarlett]

44 minutes ago, cjzimmer1 said:

But why should they?  It's not their responsibility to be able to guess when previous tenants move out or how long it takes to flip an apartment between renters.  I know you probably don't want to hear this, but the fault definitely lies with your kids for not allowing enough time between ending their rental and getting moved.  Buying a house is seldom without snags, they should have had a couple of weeks overlap, thus when closing changed they wouldn't have caused havoc for themselves, the rental company and the future renter.

I agree they should have allowed more time. Live and learn. I disagree that the complex should be scheduling next tenet  so closely  that no time is allowed for any delays. And the  certainly don’t have the right to attempt an illegal eviction. 
 

Less thank 2 weeks after the initial notice to move out the complex was told there was a delay. They had plenty of time to notify the new tenant there  would be a delay. They did not. They chose instead to bully 22 year olds. 

[Scarlett]

3 minutes ago, Annie G said:

Congrats to your kids on their first house!

Apartment renting is very different than when I was renting in the 80’s. Dd and her husband moved from one apartment to another this month and the new apartment has been vacant since they first looked at in June.  Their old apartment demanded that they vacate by noon on the last weekday of July, and the new place wouldn’t give them keys until 2 PM on the 1st.  Weird. 

Yes very weird. They have all these weird internal rules. A lot of it is  based on  leasing commission. 

[TechWife]

1 hour ago, Bambam said:

Yes, we've purchased several houses and closings can be delayed.  We've always tried to make sure we have a couple of weeks - month overlap to allow for delays + less stressful moving. 

But a new tenant who signs a lease in good faith to have that apartment starting on their lease date - they have no rights because the previous tenant didn't calculate their move out date properly? I don't even want to estimate the financial cost to us if that apartment isn't available for another week. Plus the stress to the college student and her parents who will be scrambling to find alternate temporary lodging. 

 

This. Housing is tight. Likely the landlord has some obligations to the incoming tenant to provide some services, but again, that's expensive for all kinds of reasons.

 

Edited August 17, 2022 by TechWife

[TechWife]

2 hours ago, Scarlett said:

The real problem here is the complex who did not allow sufficient turn over time. Things happen. It is VERY common in buying a house for the closing date to be delayed. And considering the law is on the side of the tenant, the complex is just setting themselves up for failure by cutting it so close. 
 

Their closing date was only delayed by one week. 

Except that you don't know that they didn't allow sufficient turn over time. People staying in the apartment past their move out date infringes on their turn over time. Contractors are tight on their schedules -  assume at a minimum the carpet needs to be cleaned and the walls painted. All of that can be accomplished relatively quickly, within a day or two, maximum. Carpet replacement could even be done within that time frame. Landlords aren't obligated to leave their property empty on the off chance that a tenant might not be able to move out in time.

The tenants that are moving out can pad their move out date, too.

 

 

[TechWife]

44 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

I agree they should have allowed more time. Live and learn. I disagree that the complex should be scheduling next tenet  so closely  that no time is allowed for any delays. And the  certainly don’t have the right to attempt an illegal eviction. 
 

Less thank 2 weeks after the initial notice to move out the complex was told there was a delay. They had plenty of time to notify the new tenant there  would be a delay. They did not. They chose instead to bully 22 year olds. 

They didn't attempt an illegal eviction. I mean, no one put their stuff out, right? They applied verbal pressure (oral or written) to attempt to get them to hold to their original date. Stating the facts isn't bullying. Why should a landlord schedule in such a way that they are giving up potential income? Why should they have to incur expenses accommodating the incoming tenants due to the outgoing tenants? This could end up being very expensive for them, especially if they have to wait until they can get contractors scheduled again. A tenant that doesn't move out in time is expensive. The landlord, the contractors and the incoming tenants all stand to loose money. The incoming tenants have also possibly given notice somewhere, so their landlord is affected as well if they need to stay, and on and on down the line.

[Scarlett]

11 minutes ago, TechWife said:

Except that you don't know that they didn't allow sufficient turn over time. People staying in the apartment past their move out date infringes on their turn over time. Contractors are tight on their schedules -  assume at a minimum the carpet needs to be cleaned and the walls painted. All of that can be accomplished relatively quickly, within a day or two, maximum. Carpet replacement could even be done within that time frame. Landlords aren't obligated to leave their property empty on the off chance that a tenant might not be able to move out in time.

The tenants that are moving out can pad their move out date, too.

 

 

I do know unless the complex is lying. They allowed 3 days. It is a huge luxury complex. They gave their own staff for repairs and such.
I agree the kids should have thought it through better. It doesn’t justify the bullying they encountered by the complex. 
They could not get out any faster than they did. There was a major amount of scrambling by everyone to get it closed yesterday. 
 

I really appreciate how my happy news has turned into this. Thanks y’all. 

[Scarlett]

5 minutes ago, TechWife said:

They didn't attempt an illegal eviction. I mean, no one put their stuff out, right? They applied verbal pressure (oral or written) to attempt to get them to hold to their original date. Stating the facts isn't bullying. Why should a landlord schedule in such a way that they are giving up potential income? Why should they have to incur expenses accommodating the incoming tenants due to the outgoing tenants? This could end up being very expensive for them, especially if they have to wait until they can get contractors scheduled again. A tenant that doesn't move out in time is expensive. The landlord, the contractors and the incoming tenants all stand to loose money. The incoming tenants have also possibly given notice somewhere, so their landlord is affected as well if they need to stay, and on and on down the line.

That is the cost of doing  business. If they can’t be more flexible than that they will damage their reputation.  

[Ann.without.an.e]

Awesome news. I remember being so excited when oldest dd and SIL found a great house 4 miles away. So exciting for y’all 🥰

[TechWife]

1 minute ago, Scarlett said:

That is the cost of doing  business. If they can’t be more flexible than that they will damage their reputation.  

Holding people to their contracts doesn't damage the reputation of the company. The entire purpose of a lease is to get rid of ambiguity. Flexibility is expensive and landlords aren't obligated to extend it.

[Scarlett]

2 minutes ago, TechWife said:

Holding people to their contracts doesn't damage the reputation of the company. The entire purpose of a lease is to get rid of ambiguity. Flexibility is expensive and landlords aren't obligated to extend it.

Actually they had to extend it. They had no choice. 

[TechWife]

Just now, Scarlett said:

Actually they had to extend it. They had no choice. 

Let me rephrase - they aren't obligated to extend it at no cost and they aren't obligated to be polite or happy about it. The tenant that is leaving isn't the only one impacted by the delay. The delay set off a cascade of other delays.

[Scarlett]

7 minutes ago, TechWife said:

Let me rephrase - they aren't obligated to extend it at no cost and they aren't obligated to be polite or happy about it. The tenant that is leaving isn't the only one impacted by the delay. The delay set off a cascade of other delays.

They did not ask for an extension at no cost. 
And yes  the cascade was started when the lender delayed. 
It was not ideal for a lot of people. 
Such is life sometimes. 
And I would now like to stop discussing how wrong my kids were. 

[Toocrazy!!]

Congrats to them! Very exciting to own a house at such a young age. Hope they make many happy memories there. 

[Scarlett]

1 minute ago, Toocrazy!! said:

Congrats to them! Very exciting to own a house at such a young age. Hope they make many happy memories there. 

I am so proud of them. 

[Bambam]

2 hours ago, Scarlett said:

Well I guess the person renting a new apartment could also plan to have padding on their end. 

WHAT? The new tenant in my case has a  signed lease with a firm start date of August 20th. 

So, regardless of any issues with the previous tenants, my tenant should be able to move in on August 20th. I might feel for the previous tenant, but a lease in writing is valid and legally enforceable.  And, yes, if my tenant cannot move in on August 20th even with a signed lease (and utilities in her name starting at that time!), that is a breach of contract, and there will be consequences. 

[Scarlett]

Just now, Bambam said:

WHAT? The new tenant in my case has a  signed lease with a firm start date of August 20th. 

So, regardless of any issues with the previous tenants, my tenant should be able to move in on August 20th. I might feel for the previous tenant, but a lease in writing is valid and legally enforceable.  And, yes, if my tenant cannot move in on August 20th even with a signed lease (and utilities in her name starting at that time!), that is a breach of contract, and there will be consequences. 

My comment to you was a bit tongue in cheek….. I mean what do you want me to say at this point? This thread was not about your kid moving in to an apartment but I hope everything goes smoothly for them. Things do happen though. 

[cbollin]

12 hours ago, Scarlett said:

My son and his wife. It is a very nice 2000 sf, 1 1/2 story on a lovely dead end street. It has been completely redone from top to bottom.  Best of all it is 2 miles from us. 

They closed today. 

 

wahoo!!!!  awesome!!!!  Happy for your family 🙂

[KSera]

27 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

 Things do happen though. 

What I’ve usually seen when these things happen and someone’s closing date is delayed, is that they have to move into a temporary arrangement for that in between time so that they can vacate the previous place on time. That often means a week or so in an extended stay hotel while stuff is held in storage. I’ve known a number of people who had to do that. 
 

In any case, a new house is super exciting and I hope they have many happy years there!

[Bambam]

36 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

My comment to you was a bit tongue in cheek….. I mean what do you want me to say at this point? This thread was not about your kid moving in to an apartment but I hope everything goes smoothly for them. Things do happen though. 

I did not realize that your comment was a bit tongue in cheek.

My point, with a personal example, is that there are TWO tenants in this equation. The person moving out, who gave legal notice they were moving out on this date, and a new tenant who might well have a signed lease for soon after that date. Both people are equally important. In a legal contract, you abide by the terms of the contract.  It stinks if you guessed wrong on the move out date, but that doesn't mean you get to inconvenience the new tenant. Both sides are important. 

I'm glad it worked out for your kids, and hopefully they learned that next time they should allow a pad for house closings - and advise any friends in the same situation to do that as well. Live lessons can bite sometimes. 

[KatieJ]

13 hours ago, Scarlett said:

My son and his wife. It is a very nice 2000 sf, 1 1/2 story on a lovely dead end street. It has been completely redone from top to bottom.  Best of all it is 2 miles from us. 

 

 

Congratulations to your family! Exciting times ahead and I trust there will be many happy memories made there.

 

Your story brought back memories of our 1 st house….we closed, and went home to our apartment where I immediately went to bed as I had a horrible ear infection. We   had 24 hours to move out, but we’re mostly packed.
Then we realized we had no key, no time set for us to actually take possession. Then we got a call from the sister in law of the owner of the home…could we help her move out. Yup, that actually happened!

It worked out in the end, and we moved,  but oye, those were a crazy couple of days! 

 

[Mrs Tiggywinkle]

Our first house closing was terrible.  The house was held in an estate but there were 22 owners that had to sign—the elderly previous owner had left it to ALL of her nieces and nephews and not just an executor or something.  All 22 of them were on the Legal documents as co-owners of the house. One lived in the boonies of Canada and had trouble finding a notary, one nephew they had to hire a private investigator to find.  The one cousin that was handling the whole thing was so annoyed. The house sold for $75,000 so each cousin only got a few hundred after everything. Our realtor had never seen anything like it. 
Fortunately we were able to continually extend our apartment lease because it was three months after our initial closing that we were actually able to close and take possession. 
 

I’m glad everything worked out!

 

Edited August 17, 2022 by Mrs Tiggywinkle

[BusyMom5]

I'm glad its all over, but I think the apartment company was in the right.  Most places allow a week to clean and repair before the next tenant moves in.  They need those days to do the repairs and such that always need done.  Most places require a 30-day notice, and a lot will only go from 1st of the month to 1st of the month- not partial months unless pre-approved.  Their lease most likely spelled it all out exactly.  They were not bullying 22 year olds, they were telling them to abide by terms if a contract.   I get thar its frustrating and they didn't plan very well- lesson learned.  

[Scarlett]

59 minutes ago, BusyMom5 said:

I'm glad its all over, but I think the apartment company was in the right.  Most places allow a week to clean and repair before the next tenant moves in.  They need those days to do the repairs and such that always need done.  Most places require a 30-day notice, and a lot will only go from 1st of the month to 1st of the month- not partial months unless pre-approved.  Their lease most likely spelled it all out exactly.  They were not bullying 22 year olds, they were telling them to abide by terms if a contract.   I get thar its frustrating and they didn't plan very well- lesson learned.  

Ok I see we need to keep talking about how wrong my kids were. 🤦🏻‍♀️ 
 

Again, a complex that large needs to be a little flexible.  The complex does have the right to expect tenants will vacate as stated. But what if it is not possible? A little compassion would not have hurt them and yes they did try to bully them.
 

They did charge the kids a prorated amount for the extra week.  
I have never seen a complex treat people like this—-or heard of it from my friends. That’s all. 
 

 

[Scarlett]

1 hour ago, Mrs Tiggywinkle said:

Our first house closing was terrible.  The house was held in an estate but there were 22 owners that had to sign—the elderly previous owner had left it to ALL of her nieces and nephews and not just an executor or something.  All 22 of them were on the Legal documents as co-owners of the house. One lived in the boonies of Canada and had trouble finding a notary, one nephew they had to hire a private investigator to find.  The one cousin that was handling the whole thing was so annoyed. The house sold for $75,000 so each cousin only got a few hundred after everything. Our realtor had never seen anything like it. 
Fortunately we were able to continually extend our apartment lease because it was three months after our initial closing that we were actually able to close and take possession. 
 

I’m glad everything worked out!

 

That is crazy!

 

[Wheres Toto]

If there lease was up and they gave notice of move-out, how was the complex asking them on the date they said illegal?    Is this something that would vary from state to state?   (my oldest rents in a complex so I'm curious about the illegal part) 

[Catwoman]

Forgetting about the drama with the apartment complex, I just wanted to congratulate your son and DIL on their new home! Yay for them!!!

 

[stephanier.1765]

That's awesome they are so close! My son and his girlfriend moved 5 minutes away (literally, by the clock, 5 min.) and she and I have become very close as a result. We spend quite a few hours a week together, which has been great for both of us. I hope having your children so close means many happy hours ahead for you, as well.

[Scarlett]

2 hours ago, Wheres Toto said:

If there lease was up and they gave notice of move-out, how was the complex asking them on the date they said illegal?    Is this something that would vary from state to state?   (my oldest rents in a complex so I'm curious about the illegal part) 

I am not sure what I said exactly….this thread has worn me out.  Lol.  But I meant trying to force them out without due process is illegal.  

[Scarlett]

2 hours ago, stephanier.1765 said:

That's awesome they are so close! My son and his girlfriend moved 5 minutes away (literally, by the clock, 5 min.) and she and I have become very close as a result. We spend quite a few hours a week together, which has been great for both of us. I hope having your children so close means many happy hours ahead for you, as well.

So far just the house buying process has helped DIL and me be closer. I have helped a lot with that. She has expressed a lot of appreciation for my help and advice. 

[AmandaVT]

Congrats to your son and his wife!! First houses are so exciting! 

[Scarlett]

4 minutes ago, AmandaVT said:

Congrats to your son and his wife!! First houses are so exciting! 

They really are.  I remember it as one of the happiest times of my life. I was 22 when ds’s dad and I bought our first house.  It was the cutest thing.  Very much a starter house.  The house the kids bought is not a starter house.  It is just beautiful.  But they have worked hard to get ds through college… he has one class left…and he already is working full time.Their life is very different than mine was at that age.  

[AmandaVT]

41 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

They really are.  I remember it as one of the happiest times of my life. I was 22 when ds’s dad and I bought our first house.  It was the cutest thing.  Very much a starter house.  The house the kids bought is not a starter house.  It is just beautiful.  But they have worked hard to get ds through college… he has one class left…and he already is working full time.Their life is very different than mine was at that age.  

Ours was a fixer upper that we not-so-fondly named the CrapShack. But, now 16 years later, we can laugh about some of the more ridiculous parts of the fixing up process!! And we were able to use the equity we had gained to get us into a longer term house a couple of years ago, that we love. And congrats to DS - almost done with college! 

[Scarlett]

9 minutes ago, AmandaVT said:

Ours was a fixer upper that we not-so-fondly named the CrapShack. But, now 16 years later, we can laugh about some of the more ridiculous parts of the fixing up process!! And we were able to use the equity we had gained to get us into a longer term house a couple of years ago, that we love. And congrats to DS - almost done with college! 

 Dh And I bought a crap shack. For cash.  We loved there for 7 years and made $100,000.  But man I am old and I don’t want to do that again. 

Edited August 18, 2022 by Scarlett

[KungFuPanda]

Wait, is this thread an example of Sea Lioning? I’ve heard about that. 🤣

[Scarlett]

30 minutes ago, KungFuPanda said:

Wait, is this thread an example of Sea Lioning? I’ve heard about that. 🤣

What is that?

[KungFuPanda]

6 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

What is that?

I know I’ve interpreted it broadly, but sometimes you’re trying to talk about one thing and things just swerve another direction. 🤣
http://wondermark.com/1k62/

 

[katilac]

14 minutes ago, KungFuPanda said:

I know I’ve interpreted it broadly, but sometimes you’re trying to talk about one thing and things just swerve another direction. 🤣
http://wondermark.com/1k62/

 

This is just standard thread drift, lol 

[Corraleno]

Yeah, sea lioning is the opposite of changing the subject, it's a form of trolling where a person harasses someone by repeatedly asking questions about a specific topic or statement and refusing to change the subject or let it go. Usually the troll will remain overly formal and polite while the target gets more and more annoyed, so the troll can then start asking "Why are you being so confrontational? Why are you trying to avoid the subject? I'm just genuinely trying to understand your POV, I'm puzzled that you won't answer my sincere questions..."  

It's not just online either — I've had those kinds of interactions IRL with people; IMO it's a form of gaslighting as well as harassment.