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Distraught - family friend's son (trigger warning suicide)


Ginevra
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Just found out that the son of a family friend killed himself by gunshot wound yesterday. I am not sure of his exact age but I estimate 22.

 

I am so devastated for them. I can only think of the impact this will have on the mom (well, everyone of course, but I know the mom best) for years and years and...ever. This was her only biological child (she has s stepson too), which is not to say it would be "better" if she had other children, but just that there is something uniquely hurtful about being a mother with no living children. And this happened just after Mother's Day!

 

Why?!

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I'm sorry.  It is horrible.  My friend's son killed himself by gunshot when he was 15.  My dd - they were good friends - still has difficult times when we talk about him.  I can't imagine the grief his family has gone through and how they have survived.

 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:

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This breaks my heart.  One of my girls was suicidal this past autumn.  It was the scariest time of my life.  There was absolutely no reasoning with her and she felt no hope whatsoever.   I felt like we were fighting a battle with our hands tied behind our backs.  There is no good answer to the question "why?"

 

DH's brother died in January (possible suicide) and we had his parents out for dinner on Mother's Day.  It was tough.

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There are no easy answers. We just did a 3 month stint with a suicidal foster boy. It is very difficult.

 

I would suggest that you be there for her both now and in the weeks and months to come. Let her talk of her son...the good and the struggles. She will likely blame herself for not noticing the signs, not doing enough, etc. There is often a lot of guilt after a suicide.

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Oh, how horrible! :crying:

 

I hope no one in that family had to be the one to discover it.... I just can't imagine such a horror.

 

:grouphug: to you and your friends.

I did just learn that his mother found him, in her own house. Oh my God, my heart is breaking for her! She will never be okay.

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I am so, so sorry.  

 

A friend's son just committed suicide a month ago.  He had some deep depression and mental illness and couldn't rid himself of his demons.  It is still raw and fresh and will never fully heal.

 

 

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Just found out that the son of a family friend killed himself by gunshot wound yesterday. I am not sure of his exact age but I estimate 22.

 

I am so devastated for them. I can only think of the impact this will have on the mom (well, everyone of course, but I know the mom best) for years and years and...ever. This was her only biological child (she has s stepson too), which is not to say it would be "better" if she had other children, but just that there is something uniquely hurtful about being a mother with no living children. And this happened just after Mother's Day!

 

Why?!

 

how awful.   Prayers for them in this time of  unspeakable grief.

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I don't know what to say. This is so utterly horrible.

 

I've had two close family/friend child suicides, and both were young men around that age. So horrible. Neither family ever became whole again, but the remaining family members have each survived in their own way. Each family was utterly devastated and forever wounded. Honestly, if there weren't other children in each of the families, I don't know that they'd have survived. It is utterly horrifying.

 

I don't think there is a right way to survive it. IME, the parents of both children desired to speak of their lost son regularly over the years, and they were hurt by those who wouldn't speak of him and comforted by remembering and speaking of him. Nonetheless, it is always painful for *me* when I mention their sons, even now, almost 20 years and 15 years after their deaths . . . I imagine it must still be painful each time for their parents, but perhaps in their cases, the sweetness is there, too, and maybe experiencing that pain with that sweetness is worth it, as they simply can NOT go on without thinking of their lost sons each day, where I, from my bit of a distance, can go days or weeks without thinking of Sean or Ryan . . . 

 

(((Hugs)))

 

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