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Wow, this is a first for me.....teen not home yet, past curfew-ish time.

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DD16 left the house this afternoon to go bowling with a guy friend.   They came back around 7pm for her to change shoes and grab a coat.  It was a quick in/out and she said they were heading to his house.  (The have property and a pond, hence the shoe change).  It is now  past 12:30Am and she isn't home.  She isn't answering her phone and neither is the friend.

 

We haven't had a set curfew before because it has always been on a case by case basis. With cell phones, if she is going to be later, it is easy to text about plan changes. Normally, for us up until 10pm is always ok, 11pm with a reason and permission, and midnight is with permission only.  Past midnight has only been for specific events. 

 

As of right now, she is at least 2 hours late. My honest guess (maybe my honest hope is better LOL), is that they curled up somewhere to watch a movie and fell asleep.  That is why they are not answering.   This is an easy assumption, because she can fall asleep pretty much anywhere if she stops moving for long enough. LOL   The other thought is maybe they found their way to a party, but unless it got busted, I would expect her to come in the door by now. 

 

I drove by the guys house and his car isn't in the driveway.  There are 6 family homes on adjacent property and I think I know which one he lives in, but I am not absolutely positive.  Several of the homes have multi-car garages, so it is conceivable that his car is in one of the garages.  Since the car isn't out front, I am not going to go knock on 6 different homes at 12:30 am to see if she is there.

 

 

Uggggh.  I do not like this, not one little bit!  We live outside a major city, so checking for accidents won't help, because there is pretty much always an accident somewhere. 

 

What to do? Just sit and wait I guess.........and contemplate consequences.    :smash:

 

 

UPDATE: 5am she is on her way home!!!

She says she will tell me the story when she gets here, but they were trapped by a downed  powerline on a mountain so they had to wait for road crews to clear it.  

 

FULL UPDATE post 96

 

 

 

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I'd probably go home, try the phones several more times and then start knocking on doors, politely apologizing to the neighbors.  I'm a bit (like huge) worrier though so you may not want to follow my hypothetical behavior.  Hope everything is alright. 

I thought about that when I drove out there the first time around midnight.  I figured I would see his car parked where it has been in the past, and go knock on the house that  corresponds to that driveway.  When his car wasn't where I expected, I drove down the driveway to each house and his car wasn't outside at any of them. Each house was completely dark from the outside, so it didn't look like anyone was up. It seems weird to me that he would park his car in the garage at his grandparents or aunts house, but who knows?  My daughter has said that each family has a couple of dogs (she is a dog lover), so I know if I knock, the entire house will get woke up.

 

It is now 130 and I am starting to worry a bit more, so I may end up going to back to the house where I am pretty sure he lives and at least try there. He has a difficult family situation and I don't want to make it worse for him, but it is getting really late. It is about a 30 minute drive each way so it will take me a bit to get out there. 

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I hope she gets in touch with you soon. I would think perhaps her phone is on silent or dead, but that she needs to look at a clock sometime. I know this sounds kinda weird, but I might log online and see if I could get someone on FB to answer my PM Lol. Like a mutual friend. But I don't know if you are on facebook, if she leaves FB open, etc. etc. Email? Cell numbers for one of her friends? They might get an alert on their phone if you send a text or email.

I figure her phone is dead also.  If she was awake and able to text, I know she would.  There is always a first for everything, but she has always been good about responding to me. I started texting her about 9:45 to find out what her plans were for the night.  She never responded. The most she has ever really been late is maybe 10 minutes or so.  This is definitely not like her.  

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creekland

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:grouphug:  If the car isn't where it usually is, it sounds like they went somewhere else.  I'd be worried at this point too - esp since you said it isn't even remotely normal behavior for her.  Hopefully they did just fall asleep somewhere and will be sheepish when they eventually come back.

 

FWIW, conveying worry is likely to get better compliance next time than anger/punishment.  Teens tend to lash back at the latter, but often have their brain developed a bit to empathize if you can get your feelings across with the former.  If it was an honest mistake of some sort, then they'll want you to understand more than punish just as any of us would want if it had been us.  

 

If it was deliberate, then it's different, esp if any alcohol (or other drugs) were involved.  Those change how the brain thinks.

 

Above all, I hope they are safe.   :grouphug:

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Not at his house either.  Just got back.  :0(

 

His parents said he called at 8pm and said he was going to work until 1am.  He works security for a sports arena.  After work, he would have to catch the Max (light rail) back to parking, and drive home.   That can take a while so I am hoping that she went with him to work to watch the game.  Very, very,very out of character for her, but at least that means she is ok.  

 

I want this to be the situation, but I am really running out of things to convince myself of.  They were at my house about 7pm, so my guess is that the work was a lie and they are somewhere else.

I tried to call one of her BFFs to see if they had been on Instagram tonight but she didn't answer.  

 

I am going to look up the number for her other friend.

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4:15 still not home.

 

I went to her bffs house at 3.  She hasn't heard anything from her.  She and her sister posted on media for me, for her friends to contact them if anyone has seen her (Thinking that a teen may be more likely to contact another teen than a parent). 

 

The boys family hasn't heard from them either, they just updated me about 4am.

 

I have called the police and hospitals. 

 

The next thing is filing a missing person's report but I will wait till morning to do that.  That flags her as a run away and I really don't want that on her file if she is just sleeping it off somewhere.  She is not known to be a partier, but there is always a first time. 

 

I am *hoping* that they ended up at a party and she passed out/fell asleep and will be in contact in the morning.  If not maybe a friend will call and update one of us. 

 

I texted her ex-boyfriend who is a partier (he wasn't until after they broke up) and he knows lots of people in that world.  He gets up pretty early, so I know he will help me get the word out too.

 

 

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Just got a text from her !!!

 

"OMG Hi Long Long Story. Im safe and on my way home" 

 

The boy is with her, but I don't know anything else yet.  

 

 

WOOOOT WOOOT!!!

 

UPDATE: a little more info:

 

She says she will tell me the story when she gets here, but they were trapped by a downed  powerline on a mountain so they had to wait for road crews to clear it.  

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Aiden

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Just got a text from her !!!

 

"OMG Hi Long Long Story. Im safe and on my way home" 

 

The boy is with her, but I don't know anything else yet.  

 

 

WOOOOT WOOOT!!!

 

UPDATE: a little more info:

 

She says she will tell me the story when she gets here, but they were trapped by a downed  powerline on a mountain so they had to wait for road crews to clear it.  

 

:hurray: :party:

 

:driving: (Just couldn't resist ... drive, girl, drive, get home and let your mama hug you!)

 

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YAY!!

 

A downed power line? Who would have thought of that? I'm glad she's safe.

 

(But I'd still ask about him telling his folks he was going to work .....)

I'm glad she is safe. I'd still be highly upset that she lied about where she was going in the first place. I'd also be calling whoever she claims moved the power line to confirm the story since she has already lied once about the evening.

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YAY!! 

 

A downed power line? Who would have thought of that? I'm glad she's safe. 

 

(But I'd still ask about him telling his folks he was going to work .....)

 

It does make sense.  If they were in certain spots on a mountain they wouldn't have had cell service. We use Verizon because it has the best service in our area, but there are still a few spots with no service. She is pretty smart about conserving her battery, so she likely turned her phone off so it wouldn't keep trying to connect to a tower that isn't there. Once the road was clear and they moved down the road a bit, they would have service again. 

 

If they were going hiking to watch a sunset the timing makes sense, it also explains the shoe change.

 

Trust buy verify....The power line story is believable, but I will also be calling ODT on Monday just to make sure. LOL  (I was one of those teens)

 

 

He lied to his parents....he can deal with them.  He is 18 but lives at home.  Thinks are already rocky at home, and I think he has been talking about moving out, so this may be a catalyst to that.  

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ThisIsTheDay

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She says she will tell me the story when she gets here, but they were trapped by a downed  powerline on a mountain so they had to wait for road crews to clear it.  

 

Agreeing that I would be doubtful of the downed powerline story because of the fact that they already lied about what they were doing/where they were going. 

 

We did things like this as teens, and my mom was none the wiser.  Even when it involved the police, it was not difficult to convince her that shaking was the result of being scared, not illegal drugs.

 

The more you lie, the easier it gets.  This likely isn't the first time, only the first time she was caught.

 

Glad she is home safe this morning.

 

:grouphug: :grouphug:

 

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JFSinIL

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I'd contact the power company and see if any downed lines were repaired last night in that area.  If not - then calmly confirm with her what road they were on...then ask why the power company has no record of any downed lines.

 

If the power company confirms a downed line - yah, no worries, all is just as she said.  But I'd still check. Mommy Radar thinks something is off.

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