my big homeschooling confession/realization

[ktgrok]

I expected we would use living books, all sorts of unusual resources, real life applications, etc etc. No boring textbooks/workbooks for us! Sonlight, unit studies, classical works of literature, writing across the curriculum, etc etc...that was what we wold do!

 

Um...yeah...that requires a certain student. I don't hvae the student. I am finally realizing it. 

 

We are instead, now using CLE light units for reading, language arts, and math. A textbook and workbook from Memoria Press for Science. And a Catholic textbook for History. Then rounded out by So You Want to Learn Latin and a giant technical manual on computer repair/building and that's it. Which leaves time for him to read on his own, listen to NPR in the car, work on building a server for his minecraft games, etc etc. 

 

I've decided all the extras are just our normal conversations, and school is "get'r done" and that's ok too. 

 

Thought I would share :)

[Amy in NH]

Yeah, it can be difficult to let go of our dream-student and settle for the student we actually have to work with.

[Hikin' Mama]

To me, that's the beauty of homeschooling. You can tailor it to your student.

 

Good job, mom! It's hard to let go of the ideal and work with what's real. (I've had to do it myself.)

[littlebug42]

I have also come to that conclusion.  I look and dream and plan but honestly, the more I stray away from the simple things, it just doesn't get done.  I do have one that reads extensively so if nothing else, she will be well read. 

[Rebel Yell]

Very similar here.  If I try to be too structured, we always feel frustrated. If I try to be too 'loose' we get very litle done. Anything that requires advance preparation almost NEVER gets done.  But if my girls have a list, and a textbook- and some DVDs, they get work done. I'm fine with that.

[Lisbeth]

:grouphug: I have had many parenting moments like that.  I had my ideals, and then... :banghead:

[ThisIsTheDay]

I expected we would use living books, all sorts of unusual resources, real life applications, etc etc. No boring textbooks/workbooks for us! Sonlight, unit studies, classical works of literature, writing across the curriculum, etc etc...that was what we wold do!

 

Um...yeah...that requires a certain student. I don't hvae the student. I am finally realizing it. 

 

 

This is EXACTLY what happened at my house when my first began high school.  I was truly crushed! After all, I'd spent YEARS building wonderful family memories with all of our read alouds, and most of what we did was lit based.   I finally agreed to let my kid use CLE for history, thinking surely she'd hate it and realize how much she loved *my* way of homeschooling and realize how much she really loved books.

 

So went my own homeschool mom fantasy world . . .

 

She only used CLE for history, and she did lit on the fly. Like your ds, she used the extra time to pursue her own passions. Those are what made her appealing when applying to colleges.  Like so many of my parenting experiences, this was a great lesson for me.

 

:) Enjoy does what works best for your kid--and embrace it! There is always a positive side to it.

[SweetMissMagnolia]

yep I can sooooo relate

 

[Garga]

Yup.  I was reading Russian authors for fun by the time I was in 8th grade.  My 6th grader won't read anything unless I force him and then only easy stuff.  I am so disappointed  I really thought we'd be reading the classics together.  I honestly, haven't given him a single classic.  He can't handle them.  He reads stuff like "Hatchet" or "Holes."  Good enough, I suppose, but not Russian authors by a long shot!  

 

And he hates Life of Fred.  Just won't take the time to let it soak in.  That has been a disappointment, too.  

 

The kids even hate art class.  Art!  How can you hate art!  Ugh!  

 

And the other day, there was that lovely thread about the importance of diagramming sentences and how everyone's kids love it.  My dh loved diagramming sentences.  My kids?  They hate it.  Hate it.  

 

We just get the work done but there isn't a lot of joy in it.  They don't cry like they used to, but they are always counting down the hours until school is done.  I can't figure out what would make them happy about it.  They view anything we do as "work" and that's all.  Even when we watch Bill Nye the Science Guy while we eat lunch they're not happy.  "Can't we just watch cartoons?" 

 

Maybe they were switched at birth at the hospital or something.  Whose kids are these!??  :)

[TKDmom]

The kids even hate art class. Art! How can you hate art! Ugh!

 

 

I always hated art... It nearly caused me panic attacks every time I had to draw a stupid picture about a story we read. I imagine that's how some people must feel about math tests. :leaving:

[LLMom]

Yes, our ideal and reality don't always match.  I had one ds that just wanted workbooks and get it over with so he could play.  Forget living books, nature study, etc.  It was hard for me to accept at first.

[Garga]

I always hated art... It nearly caused me panic attacks every time I had to draw a stupid picture about a story we read. I imagine that's how some people must feel about math tests. :leaving:

 

Well, you and my kids would get along great!  Sigh.  Maybe our art is just lame or something.  I dunno.  

[LucyStoner]

Love the one you're with. Teach the student you have, not the fantasy student in your head. Makes perfect sense to me.

 

My 5th grader loves those Evan Moor workbooks to augment language arts. Loves them, never

thought I would use workbooks.

[lil' maids in a row]

Yep, my little Charlotte Mason dream has turned into a stack of Horizon's workbooks. It makes me a bit sad, but dd is doing better than ever.

[Peaceful Isle]

I tried sonlight 3 times...it never worked. I tried My fathers world, twice. My kids loved the living books type of learning! It was me. Yes, I'm ashamed to say it.

I want the workbooks and the list I can check off. Every time I think about read a louds, I yawn. Including right now! Maybe if I had more energy. Who knows.

[ChristusG]

:::sigh::: Me too. Ugh. All my fun homeschooling plans are out the window. My kids rush through art projects just so they can be "done with school" and go play. They love worksheets, especially  my 4th grader, so she can see her accomplishment and "check off that box." I give up LOL.

[Ausmumof3]

I just want to say thanks for posting this. I love sonlight and the books but trying to follow the schedule makes me feel like I'm going crazy. I like our workbook subjects like math and phonics where we do an exercise/ ch and it's done. I am going to move to more workbooks and just keep the read alouds for the end of the day when there is time.

[mom@shiloh]

Thank you for this.  My new mantra:  "Teach the kid you have."   That, along with my previous one, "The best curriculum is the one that gets done."  ought to keep me guilt-free for the next few years.

 

[jelbe5]

Love this thread! The problem I have with Charlotte Mason - Ambleside Online - Living Books is not the fact that that I have almost all of the recommended books via library discards. The problem is it is the way I wish I had been educated! I do find time to fit in AO reading just for me. The bookshelf with all those wonderful books is now in my bedroom. It might take 24 years instead of 12 to get through them but so what?

[Night Elf]

I had the same realization when my son was in the 7th grade and my dd was in 5th grade. We were relaxed with schooling anyway but they both preferred programs that had boxes to check off so they knew exactly what to do each day and when the school day was done. It was hard for me to accept at first but the kids were happier so we switched and didn't look back.

[Excelsior! Academy]

I hear you!!  Our classical/Charlotte Mason approach has defaulted to textbooks and math on the computer.  I was never going to be one of those moms who didn't teach and let their children learn a subject on the computer, let alone math.  Yet, it is THE BEST thing we have ever done!

[Sisyphus]

Yup. I have my eclectic, inquisitive child, and his brother who is...not. Years and years of fun!exciting! Hands on! Visual! Out of the box! curriculum hunts for me, met with eye rolling, "are we done yet" by him. He loves Calvert. It's all laid out in the schedule, he checks it off, he is done. He has no desire to read or learn one iota more than is required and apparently this is just how he is- it's not from lack of trying.

 

School in a box works for him, he is getting a decent education with plenty of time for his staggering extra curriculars that are his real love. not what I ever envisioned, but working for us, so at least there is that!

 

I think if I had a lot (like, a whole heaping lot) more money I could accomplish both- get him learning and enjoying at the same time. But I don't.

[Desert Strawberry]

We veered off into workbook land for a few years. Now we are officially workbook free. This school is exactly the one I imagined(except for the wiggliness. My imaginary kids didn't wiggle.)

[Captivated]

 My imaginary kids didn't wiggle.)

 

Bwa ha ha ha!!  Exactly!

[DawnM]

I had dreams.  Then I was given children who somehow thought they could have minds of their own.

 

 

[catz]

Yup. I have my eclectic, inquisitive child, and his brother who is...not. Years and years of fun!exciting! Hands on! Visual! Out of the box! curriculum hunts for me, met with eye rolling, "are we done yet" by him. He loves Calvert. It's all laid out in the schedule, he checks it off, he is done. He has no desire to read or learn one iota more than is required and apparently this is just how he is- it's not from lack of trying.

 

School in a box works for him, he is getting a decent education with plenty of time for his staggering extra curriculars that are his real love. not what I ever envisioned, but working for us, so at least there is that!

 

I think if I had a lot (like, a whole heaping lot) more money I could accomplish both- get him learning and enjoying at the same time. But I don't.

See, now when you have a kid that is passionate about something that most people consider extra curricular, I think doing some box checking in other areas is completely fine. The extra curricular is likely fun, exciting, hands on, and out of the box for the child. :)

 

Both my kids have important extra curriculars. And they do box checking at home in some areas.

[Crimson Wife]

I had all these grand visions when we started HSing of beautiful lapbooks, the projects from the SOTW AG, etc., etc. and NO BORING WORKBOOKS, only to discover I have a kid who thinks workbooks are "fun".

 

When I lamented about this fact to my mom, she told me that she thinks the reason I developed such an aversion to workbooks myself is because the ones my school made me do growing up were too easy for me. She thinks that had I been given workbooks at an appropriately challenging level, I probably would've liked them just like oldest DD does.

[73349]

I believe that "Flap Your Wings" by P.D. Eastman is the best parenting book out there. That's exactly what it's about: you raise the kid you have.

[strange_girl]

*sigh*

 

My kids love workbooks too. Who knew?!

 

They also love being read to and reading on their own, so I guess I've got just about the best of both worlds. :)

[Desert Strawberry]

I hear you!!  Our classical/Charlotte Mason approach has defaulted to textbooks and math on the computer.  I was never going to be one of those moms who didn't teach and let their children learn a subject on the computer, let alone math.  Yet, it is THE BEST thing we have ever done!

My second grader is FINALLY learning... from Funnix. I have no involvement at all. He loves it. It's clicking. 

It feels like cheating.

[CyndiLJ]

When we started, we were very eclectic.  Heck, we had to be, I had no idea what I was doing and we jumped in with a week's notice!  I bounced back and forth, found a few things, and we've tried it all...workbooks, textbooks, computer programs, living books, dvd lectures, you name it.

 

Where have we settled?  Right there still, with a little bit of everything.  We discovered we really dislike textbooks for history, because we prefer to debate and discuss.  We discovered we prefer textbooks for science because we want the photos and illustrations to help explain principles.  We do a mix of textbook and real books for literature, to get a nice mixture as well as some good novels under our belts.  Math is best handled visually with Teaching Textbooks for my ELL learners.  Hands on is for just about everything else.

 

Would have loved Sonlight myself when I was a kid, but as an adult teaching it I think their manual was not enough for me as a parent to work with, and too much reading would have left us unhappy.  Classical?  Oh, how I would have loved to say, "Yes, we are offering our Dear Children a classical education."...sounds so Harvard-y!!!  However, it would have bored us all to tears.  Charlotte Mason just didn't feel structured enough to help me feel confident.

 

So what did we do?  LaJoy Academy created its own approach, and it is working beautifully!  Recognizing that our schooling doesn't have to look a bit like anyone else's in order to be valid and well done was freeing.  Now, we use whatever tool will work best this year for a particular subject, while recognizing next year we may have had enough of that style of learning and want to move on to something else.  The important thing is that they love learning and do a lo of it.  That's all I care about.

[Rjmakmom]

I expected we would use living books, all sorts of unusual resources, real life applications, etc etc. No boring textbooks/workbooks for us! Sonlight, unit studies, classical works of literature, writing across the curriculum, etc etc...that was what we wold do!

 

Um...yeah...that requires a certain student. I don't hvae the student. I am finally realizing it. 

 

We are instead, now using CLE light units for reading, language arts, and math. A textbook and workbook from Memoria Press for Science. And a Catholic textbook for History. Then rounded out by So You Want to Learn Latin and a giant technical manual on computer repair/building and that's it. Which leaves time for him to read on his own, listen to NPR in the car, work on building a server for his minecraft games, etc etc. 

 

I've decided all the extras are just our normal conversations, and school is "get'r done" and that's ok too. 

 

Thought I would share :)

 

 

I could have written this exact post, including using CLE for Reading, Math and LA. My daughter is using Abeka for science (which I swore I would NEVER use lol) and the only history we are getting done is watching the Liberty's Kids dvds. Even though I think I checked out every book my library system has on the Revolution, they are still sitting untouched in the library bin. We do 2 co-ops per week, so that covers everything else, but this is certainly NOT what I thought my homeschooling would look like. I pictured lots of hands on projects and rabbit trails.....

[ktgrok]

I could have written this exact post, including using CLE for Reading, Math and LA. My daughter is using Abeka for science (which I swore I would NEVER use lol) and the only history we are getting done is watching the Liberty's Kids dvds. Even though I think I checked out every book my library system has on the Revolution, they are still sitting untouched in the library bin. We do 2 co-ops per week, so that covers everything else, but this is certainly NOT what I thought my homeschooling would look like. I pictured lots of hands on projects and rabbit trails.....

 

LOL, I see your bin of library books and raise you a full bookshelf of used books on the American Revolution. My plan is that we will finish the text we are using before the end of the year, and then he can read each day from whichever book he chooses off that shelf. If it doesn't get done well, at least we will have finished the text. (the catholic textbook books are fairly interesting to my son, so that has worked well.)

 

I do like the new Memoria Press middle school science texts/workbooks. They are not just the facts, they incorporate the history of the science as well. 

[KSinNS]

My homeschooling fantasy (brief though it was) involved lots of workbooks! And building things! (the things I like). We're doing some workbooks, but fewer as time goes on. 

 

But that's just like all my other parenting fantasies....

my kids were NEVER going to sleep in my bed

they would NEVER use a pacifier

I would NEVER force them to eat

I would NEVER say "shhhh the baby's sleeping." :-}