WWYT (church situation...obviously CC)

[BakersDozen]

If you began attending a church where women's ministries were strong (Bible studies, movie nights, scrapbooking days, luncheons, etc.) yet a change occurred and women's ministries were "suspended" per pastoral staff, what would you think?  There is one group for young moms that was by invitation only - no advertising in the bulletin - along with a Thursday morning playgroup that is also not advertised.  A Mom's Night Out "ran it's course" and is not allowed and, even when it was going, was not advertised in the bulletin, either.  

 

What would you think/do?  

[OrganicAnn]

I would think it odd and very cliquey that there were groups that everyone wasn't invited to.  

[Lawana]

I would wonder if there is something highly patriarchal afoot. Women's place is in the home kind of thing.

[*********]

It's really hard to say. I wouldn't know what to think until I knew why the groups you mentioned were cancelled.

[Whereneverever]

Sounds weird. Have you asked why?

[Catwoman]

Why don't you just ask your pastor about it?

[Flowing Brook]

I would ask about it.  Might seem one way when it really is another. 

It could be something happened like gossip that hurt some people so that is why it was cancelled.  Really you should ask about all of the issues.

[bolt.]

How big is the Church?

 

At a small Church, I'd assume that all these groups are/were individually started and run by laypeople, just "ministering" to their peers under the Church umbrella -- approved, and semi-official, but not really deeply tied to any staff person or overseen. In that case, if "Suzy" has a Bible study that she's running, and she decides not to do it any more, it stops happening. If "those six ladies from Church" meet at a place/time, that's just what they do, because they like to -- even if they meet at the Church. If "Julie" wants to hold a scrapbooking lunch, she plans it and does it, and if she wants to do another, that's fine, and if not, that's fine too.

 

At small Churches with free reign of personal ministries, groups spring up and peter out all the time. Sometimes they temporarily peter out, and are intended to pick up again when participants/leaders can be assembled, or just after a break for the person running it -- or whatever is needed. These are often not bulliten-ized simply because they are not run by staff and can tend to be intermittent/unreliable.

 

It would be different if the pastoral staff "suspended these ministries" <-- which means there was a problem or a resource conflict...  or if the pastoral staff "let you know that the ministries are suspended (for summer, or whatever)" <-- which just means 'not running right now, but might pick up again, so watch for info'.

 

At a larger Church, where these things would be staff-run etc. I'd assume they lost their 'women's pastor' and were looking for another one, who might or might not re-start similar things.

[Seasider]

I would wonder if there is something highly patriarchal afoot. Women's place is in the home kind of thing.

Ayup. Look closely. Has there been a change in the pastoral staff? The elder board? What sort of things are being studied in the men's realm? Which Christian celebrities has your teaching pastor been quoting of late? Has an extensive new membership contract been introduced? Was there a recent surge to get the mortgage and/or other church debt paid off?

 

You may be witness to a stealth takeover...

[Little Nyssa]

I would wonder if some of the groups that are continuing are not official church groups, per se, but groups that were started by individuals in the church as their own private groups, and they happen to have many church people in them because they are their friends.  

Or perhaps a woman who was actively leading these groups died? or retired? or left the church? or was involved in some scandal? or decided she had done her part but nobody else had stepped forward to continue them? (yet)

I would want to know why they were suspended. Were they suspended or are they no longer allowed?  It isn't necessarily some kind of patriarcal oppression-- I would wait to judge that til I knew more.

[Seasider]

I would ask about it. Might seem one way when it really is another.

It could be something happened like gossip that hurt some people so that is why it was cancelled. Really you should ask about all of the issues.

Including the definition of "gossip."

[mommaduck]

If you began attending a church where women's ministries were strong (Bible studies, movie nights, scrapbooking days, luncheons, etc.) yet a change occurred and women's ministries were "suspended" per pastoral staff, what would you think?  There is one group for young moms that was by invitation only - no advertising in the bulletin - along with a Thursday morning playgroup that is also not advertised.  A Mom's Night Out "ran it's course" and is not allowed and, even when it was going, was not advertised in the bulletin, either.  

 

What would you think/do?  

 

Let me get this straight...the public ministries were suspended, but there are invitation only ones still happening? Or there were invitation only ones happening and those got suspended?

 

My answer will depend upon which of the above we are talking about.

[GailV]

Let me get this straight...the public ministries were suspended, but there are invitation only ones still happening? Or there were invitation only ones happening and those got suspended?

 

My answer will depend upon which of the above we are talking about.

 

I wondered about that, too.  Which is it?

[Peace out muffins]

I'd be thinking it's time for me to find a new church.

 

Weird, creepy and a jerk move.

[Flowing Brook]

Including the definition of "gossip."

 

Sincere question what do you mean?

[BakersDozen]

 

Let me get this straight...the public ministries were suspended, but there are invitation only ones still happening? Or there were invitation only ones happening and those got suspended?

 

Ministries that were church-wide are no longer allowed.  These would be the women's movie nights, once-a-month brunches, scrapbooking, etc.  Invitation-only groups began such as the mom's play group yet when I asked about advertising it in the bulletin I was ignored, so I made my own little cards and handed them out to every mom I met.  Shortly after that the Mom's Night Out was cancelled.  There was one women's Bible study being led by a 75yo woman who had led it for years yet I just found out that she has left the church, apparently because of the changes being put in place.  Two women who led the women's ministries were told to step down and their positions (not paid, volunteer) were taken over by the new associate pastor.  

 

Yes, there was a change of pastoral staff in that an associate pastor was brought on.  With his coming came rules, regulations, restrictions, etc.  The church runs more like a business than a place of fellowship.  

 

 

 

Why don't you just ask your pastor about it? 

 

I plan to ask the associate pastor about this as he is the one apparently calling the shots.  I had to see if this was something common or if this feels as "off" as I think it does.

[GailV]

Yes, it seems "off", as you say.

 

It also seems like the Powers That Be have no clue how to effectively implement change in their organization without alienating a good deal of the organization.  It sounds like they're doing a textbook What Not to Do, as a matter of fact.  Do they not teach these things in seminary?  Because churches seem to be hotbeds of leadership screwing up the change process.

[bettyandbob]

It sounds like there's an agenda that is not being communicated to the the congregation. It might make me start looking for a new place to worship. 

[mommaduck]

It sounds like there's an agenda that is not being communicated to the the congregation. It might make me start looking for a new place to worship. 

 

This.

 

However, I believe the Mom's Night Out was either to avoid certain people from being invited or avoid getting shut down. You're passing out cards contributed to exposure (regardless whether they were right or wrong).

[BakersDozen]

 

 

However, I believe the Mom's Night Out was either to avoid certain people from being invited or avoid getting shut down. You're passing out cards contributed to exposure (regardless whether they were right or wrong).

I guess I can see this.  The thing is I ran the card idea by the pastor's wife (whom I partnered with to put together the Mom's Night Out).  She thought the cards were a great idea and took some herself to pass out.  And then it just stopped and when I asked about planning another one I was told it had "run its course."  Why would the church leadership not want moms to get together?  Who would they want to exclude?  I've not been in a church where this happened and am very confused.

 

 

[marbel]

Ministries that were church-wide are no longer allowed. 

 

No longer allowed by whom?  Pastor?  New Associate?

 

Sometimes ministries do run their course, or people stop attending except a dedicated few who want to keep it going for the sake of "we've always done this."  This doesn't sound like that at all.

 

What kind of leadership hierarchy does your church have?   (In my church there is a group of elders; each family/individual is on a pastoral oversight list.  If we have an issue we are encouraged to start with our elder though we are certainly free to speak to anyone in leadership, including the pastor.) 

 

It does sounds weird.  I'm not going straight to "patriarchal" but when you say things are no longer allowed... that's just odd.

[Carol in Cal.]

I can think of two reasonable possibilities.  One is that the women's staff was not teaching purely, and the pastors decided that since they are seminary trained and responsible for all teaching in the parish, they needed to sort of reset the whole area of work and start it over on a more theologically sound footing.  In that case, failing to inform the general congregation is probably because it would be gossipy or very hurtful to do so, but I would assume that they would be willing to answer questions about it if they were tendered privately.

 

The other is that the new pastor is hamhandedly trying to take over areas that he is particularly interested in, without regard for those who have been serving in those areas for a long time, in which case I would be very unhappy with his insensitivity and would probably gently but clearly confront him about it, but privately.

[Guest]

I would go to a pastor personally. I have been through this and speculation/gossip only makes things worse. I wouldn't expect them to give you every last detail, but I would suspect that you would either feel at peace or not about the situation.

[bolt.]

It sounds like the Church is taking a "new direction" that includes more direct pastoral control and less equal treatment and freedom for women. Not good in my view. I think I'd start to transition before I got too attached.

[Rebel Yell]

Ministries that were church-wide are no longer allowed.  These would be the women's movie nights, once-a-month brunches, scrapbooking, etc.  Invitation-only groups began such as the mom's play group yet when I asked about advertising it in the bulletin I was ignored, so I made my own little cards and handed them out to every mom I met.  Shortly after that the Mom's Night Out was cancelled.  There was one women's Bible study being led by a 75yo woman who had led it for years yet I just found out that she has left the church, apparently because of the changes being put in place.  Two women who led the women's ministries were told to step down and their positions (not paid, volunteer) were taken over by the new associate pastor.  

 

Yes, there was a change of pastoral staff in that an associate pastor was brought on.  With his coming came rules, regulations, restrictions, etc.  The church runs more like a business than a place of fellowship.  

 

 

I plan to ask the associate pastor about this as he is the one apparently calling the shots.  I had to see if this was something common or if this feels as "off" as I think it does.

 

Is it *only* womens ministries that are affected?  What about youth groups, children;s programs, mens groups, senior citizen groups?

 

The only resonable possibility I can imagine is if all volunteer-run groups are stopped it could be due insurance reasons...  say, the church needs to have a handbook and guidelines for people who serve or else they can't get insurance covereage. But that should be made known- as in, "we're putting  a temporary hold on BlahBlah ministries until we can out new proceeddures in place to cpmpky with insurance regultions." (or non-profit status...  something similar)

 

Being run in a business0like manner isn;t necessarily evil...  I am in favor or rules/guidelines with room for flexibility. But running a church like a business for the sole purpose of filling seats and the collection plate?  Eh- no.

[Ravin]

My mom's church had a major upheaval when the new pastor started insisting that the congregation start keeping better to the doctrines of the denomination/synod, particularly with regard to the roles of women. A large segment of the congregants moved to another church in a closely related (but slightly less patriarchal) denominational organization.

[Catwoman]

Before anyone assumes that this is some sort of patriarchal movement within the church, I think we need a lot more information on whether other church programs have been impacted/changed/cancelled by the new leadership. (I'm not saying that's not what's happening, just that maybe we should give the pastor the benefit of the doubt until womanintheshoe speaks with him and finds out what's going on.)

 

Womanintheshoe has told us about the issues that affect her personally, but perhaps the changes are church-wide, and not just the ones involving women's activities.

 

I still think it's premature to make any judgments until she has spoken directly with her pastor about this. We can have all the suspicions we want, but we really don't have a clue, except that it sounds like an awful lot of changes are being made in a very short time frame. I'm sure most of us would agree that something is going on there, and that womanintheshoe needs more information before she can evaluate how she's going to deal with it.

 

I'm glad she's planning to speak with the associate pastor, since it sounds like he's the one who is implementing the changes.

[BakersDozen]

 

 

Sometimes ministries do run their course, or people stop attending except a dedicated few who want to keep it going for the sake of "we've always done this."  This doesn't sound like that at all.

The women's ministry events were very well attended and anticipated.  Our Sister Sharing days were packed.

 

 

 

Is it *only* womens ministries that are affected?  What about youth groups, children;s programs, mens groups, senior citizen groups?

The children's/youth ministries have undergone no change at all.  The men still have (and advertise) their breakfast and Bible study.  There are no senior groups or any other groups outside of those which makes what happened to the women's ministry all the more obvious and confusing. 

 

 

 

 it sounds like an awful lot of changes are being made in a very short time frame

Our church went from 80 people to about 500 in a matter of months so yes, there are a lot of changes that happened as the church leadership had to figure out how to adjust to the new numbers.  What I saw was the women's ministry (along with other ministries) were even better attended and supported, yet all of a sudden the woman who had led the ministry for years was suddenly removed and another woman put in her place, then the associate pastor took all leadership away and put the women's ministry under himself.  Very sudden, very abrupt, and totally confusing.

 

Thank you all for your thoughts.  I hesitate to approach leaders in the church (not sure why) and needed to know if I was just being too sensitive or that this is the trend among churches now.  

[Whereneverever]

It's not the trend. At least not a trend in healthy churches. I would address it immediately and if it wasn't resolved I'd leave.

[Catwoman]

I don't know why you would be at all hesitant to approach the church leaders to ask questions and express your concerns. You have every right to know what's going on. The church leaders are just people, not any more important or better or smarter or wiser than you or anyone else, and if they aren't made aware that people have issues with their new policies, they will never have a chance to repair any damage that may have been done.

 

In so many situations, people whine and complain and gossip to each other, but no one has the nerve to approach the people who can actually do something about their concerns.

[bolt.]

It sounds like your Church has undergone a coup.

 

A "Church Coup" is when a group of people (known to each other) "join" an existing small Church en-masse. Once they outnumber the original congregation, they use voting rights (as members) to add to the elders/whatever and hire their own staff members. Sometimes the pre-existing pastor is dismissed or caused to choose to move on. The new majority implements their own specific ideas, over the objections of the original congregants -- because a minority is easy to ignore, and all members are members now, so it's a simple disagreement. Often original members are so distressed, or simply object to the new way things are done that they move on and leave the church building and assets in the hands of the newcomers.

 

It's much cheaper and easier than building your own building as a new church... And it's almost impossible to resist in a church that values a 'majority opinion' style of decision making.

[Guest]

Our pastor does not  take the position of "allowing" us to have groups or not.  He doesn't dictate what ministries we start.  What he DOES do is encourage them.  I would not be comfortable at a church that thought they could tell us what groups/ministries we were and weren't allowed to have.  As long as they are within the statement of faith of the church and are doing nothing to harm it, I don't see where it is a bad thing.  That said, I would approach the powers that be.  If they can't come up with a reasonable explanation, I would be looking for a new church.

[LucyStoner]

Run, don't walk.

[marbel]

.

 

Thank you all for your thoughts.  I hesitate to approach leaders in the church (not sure why) and needed to know if I was just being too sensitive or that this is the trend among churches now.  

 

Honestly, there is something wrong if you are hesitant to speak to your church leadership.  Your pastor should be available and happy to speak to you about your concerns.  Before this new situation, did you find your pastor unapproachable?

 

What caused the sudden growth?  Do you have any idea?  From 80 to 500 in a few months is a huge jump. 

 

 

[SunnyDays]

I agree, you really need to get the story straight from one of the pastors. But something does seem off, especially with you saying there seem to be no changes to other ministries. I find it hard to imagine a situation where this would be a good thing.

 

If you ask, you might get an answer that makes you feel much better (like, maybe there was a kerfuffle among women's leadership, they temporarily halted everything, and they're in the process of relaunching). You might get an answer you don't like. Or you might get the runaround and no real answer at all, which is, in and of itself, a sort of answer. But at least you'll be able to make an educated decision of what to do next. :grouphug:

[Chris in VA]

I would suspect the teaching needed to be reigned in. But that's just because my husband is careful with what is taught in the church. 

I have no problem with him overseeing stuff--that's part of his job. He puts people in charge that he trusts and does not micromanage, but he does look at the materials they use. 

 

Doesn't quite fit with your situation, tho.

 

If I didn't feel comfortable talking with my minister, I wouldn't be attending the church in the first place. That's sorta your first clue that it isn't a good fit, isn't it?

[marbel]

I would suspect the teaching needed to be reigned in. But that's just because my husband is careful with what is taught in the church. 

I have no problem with him overseeing stuff--that's part of his job. He puts people in charge that he trusts and does not micromanage, but he does look at the materials they use. 

 

Doesn't quite fit with your situation, tho.

 

If I didn't feel comfortable talking with my minister, I wouldn't be attending the church in the first place. That's sorta your first clue that it isn't a good fit, isn't it?

 

I could see that.  That would make sense if it was just the Bible studies.  But scrapbooking nights?  That's what makes me wonder what's really going on

 

For most of my (Christian) life I've belonged to churches that had a pretty strict form of church government, as in there are specific ways to do things (and not to do things). There is good oversight of any teaching done in the church; the pastor and/or elders vet the teachers (men and women) and the materials they use.  But that hasn't anything to do with social events where there is no explicit teaching. 

 

I agree that oversight of teaching materials is a good thing.  When I was leading women's Bible study, I was happy to have the pastor approve the materials I chose and to have someone to go to with questions I couldn't answer. 

[Chris in VA]

Ooo--missed the scrapbooking.

 

Yeah, something is off.

 

IDK. I still stand by my last statement, though. I just couldn't go to a church where I felt the minister was unapproachable. After all, his/her job is to be my pastor, teacher, spiritual leader--why go where you cannot be in a close Christian relationship with your clergy? 

 

 

[bobbeym]

You need to talk to your pastors about it.

 

I've been through this twice at the same church.  The first time, Pastor M was very open and upfront that all ministries were on hold while the church body decided what was working best and what could be improved on. It was only for a few months and everything slowly ramped up again.

 

When Pastor M left, Pastor S came back (he'd previously been youth pastor at that church prior to Pastor M's time) and brought his younger, but now adult, flock with him.  Over the next few months, all groups were stopped as he put his new ones into practice.  The women's ministry no longer became a bible study with devotional time but a very cliquish social gathering. When we asked about it, we were told "the women don't want that anymore". I was very vocal about how nobody asked ME what I wanted, and I knew others that hadn't been asked either.  That view eventually bled over into his sermons and that was when we knew it was time to leave and look elsewhere.

[JuanitaL]

It sounds like your Church has undergone a coup.

 

A "Church Coup" is when a group of people (known to each other) "join" an existing small Church en-masse. Once they outnumber the original congregation, they use voting rights (as members) to add to the elders/whatever and hire their own staff members. Sometimes the pre-existing pastor is dismissed or caused to choose to move on. The new majority implements their own specific ideas, over the objections of the original congregants -- because a minority is easy to ignore, and all members are members now, so it's a simple disagreement. Often original members are so distressed, or simply object to the new way things are done that they move on and leave the church building and assets in the hands of the newcomers.

 

It's much cheaper and easier than building your own building as a new church... And it's almost impossible to resist in a church that values a 'majority opinion' style of decision making.

I saw something similar to this in a church we once attended. A new associate pastor was brought in, he very quickly brought in 3 other staff members  that he had worked with in a couple of other churches. They were put into newly created paid positions that had always been volunteer; the people who had invested years in their ministries were welcome to keep volunteering under someone now being paid to do what they had always done. A lot of the older, established families left hurt, and tithes and offerings dropped enough that it couldn't keep up with all the new staff expenses, etc. I had never before realized that there were groups/teams of church staff who would follow each other around (this instance wasn't different churches in the same town, but different churches in different parts of the state - and it was actually WA, so they had to cross a mountain range). Anyway, "coup" immediately made me think of that church.

[sassenach]

If you began attending a church where women's ministries were strong (Bible studies, movie nights, scrapbooking days, luncheons, etc.) yet a change occurred and women's ministries were "suspended" per pastoral staff, what would you think?  There is one group for young moms that was by invitation only - no advertising in the bulletin - along with a Thursday morning playgroup that is also not advertised.  A Mom's Night Out "ran it's course" and is not allowed and, even when it was going, was not advertised in the bulletin, either.  

 

What would you think/do?  

 

I'll give you my take from a church leader perspective- Sometimes the elders have to shut things down for a season.  Maybe a leader was going off the rails.  Or a leader stepped away and no one else (who was qualified) stepped up.  Or maybe there was something really unhealthy happening within the ministry.  Or maybe the Holy Spirit compelled the elders to make a decision, for reasons only God fully understands.  There can be a lot of reasons to close a ministry for a season.  If Mom's night out is not allowed- as in banned- maybe something happened?  

 

As for the invitation only stuff, our church only advertises church "approved" events.  Meaning, with an identified leader, who is accountable to an elder or deacon, ect.  It can be very easy for bad teaching to sneak into the church if we advertise things that we're not also supervising on some level.  So we have moms that get together regularly, and they're not exclusive, but they're also not "advertising."  As church leadership, there's not really anything we can or should do about that, I think.  People have the freedom to get together as often as they want.  We're not going to advertise it, but we're also not going to stop it.

 

In your shoes, I'd have a conversation with leadership.  You might not get the full story, but maybe they can give you an idea of what's next for the ministry.

[sassenach]

 

 

Our church went from 80 people to about 500 in a matter of months so yes, there are a lot of changes that happened as the church leadership had to figure out how to adjust to the new numbers.  What I saw was the women's ministry (along with other ministries) were even better attended and supported, yet all of a sudden the woman who had led the ministry for years was suddenly removed and another woman put in her place, then the associate pastor took all leadership away and put the women's ministry under himself.  Very sudden, very abrupt, and totally confusing.

 

Thank you all for your thoughts.  I hesitate to approach leaders in the church (not sure why) and needed to know if I was just being too sensitive or that this is the trend among churches now.  

Read this after I posted. I would trust your pastor on this.  Rapid growth tends to cause issues that were lying under the radar to suddenly surface.  More than once we've had to remove a leader in an abrupt fashion because they disqualified themselves in such a way that required action.  Don't expect to find out exactly what happened, but try to give your elders the benefit of the doubt.  They know something you don't know.

 

We had a situation where a leader, who had led for over a DECADE, showed up drunk to an event.  When I tell you this was out of left field, it was OUT OF LEFT FIELD.  But the thing was, another leader noticed before anyone else, and was able to quietly bring in elders.  No one but the woman, the other leader, the elders, and her husband know about this incident.  The woman remained part of the church, and leadership supported her through her recovery from alcoholism.  We love her, we're for her, but we had to remove her from leadership very quickly. And because of that, some pieces of what she did had to be discontinued for a season.   People noticed.  We couldn't tell them what happened, they just had to trust us.  

[JuanitaL]

There is one group for young moms that was by invitation only - no advertising in the bulletin - along with a Thursday morning playgroup that is also not advertised.  A Mom's Night Out "ran it's course" and is not allowed and, even when it was going, was not advertised in the bulletin, either.  

 

 

 

 

the women's movie nights, once-a-month brunches, scrapbooking, etc.  Invitation-only groups began such as the mom's play group yet when I asked about advertising it in the bulletin I was ignored, so I made my own little cards and handed them out to every mom I met.  Shortly after that the Mom's Night Out was cancelled.  

 

 

 

 

I ran the card idea by the pastor's wife (whom I partnered with to put together the Mom's Night Out).  She thought the cards were a great idea and took some herself to pass out.  And then it just stopped and when I asked about planning another one I was told it had "run its course."

I also think that if you played a part in some of these get-togethers and someone else decided they were over without some kind of discussion .... I would continue to plan  playgroups, Mom's night outs, and other fun things with other women. Obviously I wouldn't do it at my church. I would continue to meet for playgroups at the park on Thursday and continue to pass out invitations to new ladies that I met at church to join us; I would continue to make plans spend the evening with other ladies doing whatever we had been enjoying - maybe rotating houses on a night when I new husband would be home with kids; maybe I would set up some card tables in my basement or garage (or someone else's) and continue my scrapbooking day. I just wouldn't do it at the church.

[Jean in Newcastle]

I just saw the "membership went from 80 to 500" part.  Why did it go up like that?  Were people in your congregation evangelizing like crazy?  Or did another bigger church join you, effectively taking over your church (esp. in a congregational type government where the majority rules?).  If people were evangelizing then you have an awful lot of baby Christians who have very different needs.  If it was another church taking over, then they are going to put in their own style of ministries.  

[trulycrabby]

I am new to Christianity, so pardon my ignorance, but is it common for churches to have invitation-only groups, such as this invitation-only women's group?

[unsinkable]

It sounds like your Church has undergone a coup.

 

A "Church Coup" is when a group of people (known to each other) "join" an existing small Church en-masse. Once they outnumber the original congregation, they use voting rights (as members) to add to the elders/whatever and hire their own staff members. Sometimes the pre-existing pastor is dismissed or caused to choose to move on. The new majority implements their own specific ideas, over the objections of the original congregants -- because a minority is easy to ignore, and all members are members now, so it's a simple disagreement. Often original members are so distressed, or simply object to the new way things are done that they move on and leave the church building and assets in the hands of the newcomers.

 

It's much cheaper and easier than building your own building as a new church... And it's almost impossible to resist in a church that values a 'majority opinion' style of decision making.

 

Wow, this is horrifying and fascinating at the same time!

 

Do you know of it happening IRL? Do you have any articles about it?

 

I

[BakersDozen]

The crazy growth came when a huge church in the area went through a traumatizing event with its pastor and many of the members came to our church.  There were, before my church, 3 "mega churches" in the area.  All three have lost members to my church for one reason or another and many of the incoming people knew each other.  The pastoral staff, however, has only one guy from one of those churches.  The new associate pastor (who is making all of these changes) came from out of state, however he also came from a mega-church.  

 

He gave me an answer this morning that I am mulling over.  Basically the leadership wants church members to meet in three areas: attend Sunday service, attend a small group, and serve in the church. Anyone who wants to offer a ministry such as a Sister Sharing brunch can approach the leadership, fill out a form, and if approved proceed with the event as long as the coordinator understands that the purpose is not a one-time get-together rather a move to get people to meet the three area listed above.  

 

Make sense to anyone?  I'm mulling this over.  

[SunnyDays]

Hmmm... I guess I understand what he's saying but I don't agree with it. It seems to be unnecessarily limiting fellowship. I guess I'm more comfortable with a church model where there are plenty of varied fellowship opportunities for everyone. Others will have a different view, I'm sure.

 

My question for you, OP: is that something you can live with, knowing it sounds like there might not be women's or moms groups and fellowship opportunities anymore?

[Peace out muffins]

I still don't like it. What if your needs are completely unmet by those areas? What about fostering community?

[justasque]

 

He gave me an answer this morning that I am mulling over.  Basically the leadership wants church members to meet in three areas: attend Sunday service, attend a small group, and serve in the church. 

 

Do moms' groups etc. not qualify as "small group"s?

Does leading one of these groups not qualify as "serving in the church"? 

I'm a bit confused.