I don't want to homeschool anymore :(

[Denisemomof4]

how do you get yourself out of this?

 

I can't ever put my dd's in school. Dd12 gets sick from the lights, dd9 - never.

 

I feel trapped! I just don't want to be responsible for anyone's education anymore. But I know I have to be.

 

I have been at this for 14 years. I never, ever intended to homeschool! I will be 50 next year and I'm just TIRED.

 

How does one get out of a slump like this??!!!!!

 

I absolutely cherish the time I have with dd12. I will cherish it because I know how quickly the time flies by! I love having her home with me. I just don't want to be a teacher anymore. Not in the academic sense. She has some sort of learning issue, if only pretty severe ADD. I do not do rigorous, classical studies with her like I did with my boys. She is totally average and I am fine with that. I just find teaching her EXHAUSTING. I am throwing in the towel with formal grammar studies. She has had more than ANY ps kid, and she has done more diagramming than any ps kid ever will. They don't even diagram in ps anymore. And spelling? PLEASE tell me there is a good spelling program on CD rom.

 

Dd9 does online school so that is easier for me.

 

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. I really hope I can snap out of this. I have been feeling it for at least a couple of years but I don't think I have openly admitted it to anyone. Not even here.

Edited March 19, 2012 by Denisemomof4

[Munchkins_mama]

Maybe change your style? Take a year off of hard core schooling and get the joy back?

[Halcyon]

Sounds like you need a MAJOR break. Outsource as much as you can. Perhaps try a whole 'nother approach to learning, even (gasp!) unschooling for a bit?

[Quiver0f10]

Maybe change your style? Take a year off of hard core schooling and get the joy back?

 

:iagree: maybe do online school for DD 12 too? Spend your time doing fun stuff instead.

[cathmom]

I feel the same way but at least for now, we will still be homeschooling.

 

:grouphug:

[StephanieZ]

Try to cut yourself some slack by choosing less mom intensive curricula for the coming year.

 

Also, be sure to ake a real spring break, and a long summer break, too.

 

Make time for yourself.

 

:grouphug::grouphug:

[SJ.]

You mentioned your 9yo does an online program, is there something available for your 12yo? Is there something you can do for her to help her not to get sick from the lights? I'm sorry you are going through this right now. :grouphug:

[SJ.]

Try to cut yourself some slack by choosing less mom intensive curricula for the coming year.

 

Also, be sure to ake a real spring break, and a long summer break, too.

 

Make time for yourself.

 

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

:iagree: Definitely make time for yourself, which I realize is easier said than done when you are a mom.

[parias1126]

I have been there. I actually just got out of this recently. I am trying to change the way I do things and make things more fun just so I want to continue homeschooling. I feel the same way you do. I can never send my children to the public school.

 

I am sure your DD will be fine if you just TAKE A BREAK! :D Why don't you just take a long break starting NOW? I've been homeschooling for 11 years and I have had to do take a break several times for my own sanity.

[Remudamom]

I got sick of it when mine reached high school. At that point I figured they needed to step up and come to me when they needed help, take the initiative to school themselves and start being really independent. So far one finished with college, one in her junior year and the youngers taking the ACT and getting ready.

 

Hang in there, it really won't be forever. Just feels like it.

[Denisemomof4]

I don't even know if my dd could keep up with an online program. I find that I help her so much.

 

We have been doing Rod and Staff grammar since grade 2. If anyone is familiar with the layout, it has the student do section A, B, C, D, Review and Practice, for example. It is different on each lesson. Anyway, sometimes A will have 1 - 5, B will have 1 - 15, C will have 1 - 10, D 1 - 8, R&P varies. She will do a few of A, a few of B, skip C, do some of D, skip R&P. Of the lessons she does, all too often she hasn't followed the directions properly. The direction thing is getting easier, but still...... it is just so exhausting. We have to hand papers back and forth many, many times for corrections. She will do some, hand in the paper, then I find she hasn't completed all of them........... so I don't even know if she could do an online course. She has come so far with everything but it truly has been a struggle.

 

I sometimes wonder if her learning difficulties are related to her undiagnosed health issues.

 

It seems so overwhelming. I try to stuff it all down but it always comes back.

 

I just don't know if I can outsource for her.

[TGHEALTHYMOM]

The Well Planned Day had an encouraging article about finding the right schedule for your family. The author found that lessons for 6 weeks, then 1 week off was what was best for her. I need to find out what works best for us besides just year round, with breaks for sickness, and field trips.

[wapiti]

She may have undiagnosed learning issues that may or may not be stemming from undiagnosed health issues? That would be overwhelming. I'd aim what energy you have left toward figuring those issues out, i.e., I vote strongly in favor of evaluations.

[vettechmomof2]

I don't even know if my dd could keep up with an online program. I find that I help her so much.

 

We have been doing Rod and Staff grammar since grade 2. If anyone is familiar with the layout, it has the student do section A, B, C, D, Review and Practice, for example. It is different on each lesson. Anyway, sometimes A will have 1 - 5, B will have 1 - 15, C will have 1 - 10, D 1 - 8, R&P varies. She will do a few of A, a few of B, skip C, do some of D, skip R&P. Of the lessons she does, all too often she hasn't followed the directions properly. The direction thing is getting easier, but still...... it is just so exhausting. We have to hand papers back and forth many, many times for corrections. She will do some, hand in the paper, then I find she hasn't completed all of them........... so I don't even know if she could do an online course. She has come so far with everything but it truly has been a struggle.

 

I sometimes wonder if her learning difficulties are related to her undiagnosed health issues.

 

It seems so overwhelming. I try to stuff it all down but it always comes back.

 

I just don't know if I can outsource for her.

 

We do R & S English as well. We just do most of it orally. It takes us about 10-30 minutes depending on the lesson. You might just want to try doing it a different way for now.

[Hilltop]

:grouphug:

 

I am only in my second year of homeschooling, so I don't have any wisdom to share with you. I do have a good friend who is in her 7th year of homeschooling who was suffering from burnout. She decided to change their schedule and finally settled on 3 weeks on, one week off. It sounds crazy to me, but it really works for her and her family. Perhaps some sort of schedule change would help?

 

Again - :grouphug:

[Mommyfaithe]

:iagree: maybe do online school for DD 12 too? Spend your time doing fun stuff instead.

 

:iagree:

 

Dd13 will be doing many outsourced classes next year. I will facilitate. Period.

 

The little boys will be doing some seat work daily, some mom time, and lots of unschooling for at least part of the year. We may do some Time4learning, some currclick classes, lots of art projects they can do themselves....mostly math, reading, writing and grammar....then play, play, play....ummmmmmm nature study:D. Lol.

 

I am more crispy than last year, if that is at all possible:tongue_smilie:

 

I have been at this 17 years.....I said I would try it for one....dh wants them home. Lately, I want to leave:glare:

 

Anyway, this too shall pass, but I promise to be nice to me next year.....make sure dd gets a good first year of high school, and my boys do not fall behind grade level. Those are my goals.

:grouphug::grouphug:

Sorry you are feeling tired. Be nice to you!!:grouphug:

[Twigs]

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

[Upward Journey]

how do you get yourself out of this?

 

I can't ever put my dd's in school. Dd12 gets sick from the lights, dd9 - never.

 

I feel trapped! I just don't want to be responsible for anyone's education anymore. But I know I have to be.

 

I have been at this for 14 years. I never, ever intended to homeschool! I will be 50 next year and I'm just TIRED.

 

How does one get out of a slump like this??!!!!!

 

I absolutely cherish the time I have with dd12. I will cherish it because I know how quickly the time flies by! I love having her home with me. I just don't want to be a teacher anymore. Not in the academic sense. She has some sort of learning issue, if only pretty severe ADD. I do not do rigorous, classical studies with her like I did with my boys. She is totally average and I am fine with that. I just find teaching her EXHAUSTING. I am throwing in the towel with formal grammar studies. She has had more than ANY ps kid, and she has done more diagramming than any ps kid ever will. They don't even diagram in ps anymore. And spelling? PLEASE tell me there is a good spelling program on CD rom.

 

Dd9 does online school so that is easier for me.

 

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. I really hope I can snap out of this. I have been feeling it for at least a couple of years but I don't think I have openly admitted it to anyone. Not even here.

 

:grouphug: I think year 14 is just hard. more :grouphug: Come to think of it, so was year 7. I don't know why.

 

I hated last year (#14). Felt like I had failed all my children. Regardless of the fact that oldest had graduated and was doing well, and 14yo was right on track to enter high school. But my 12yo....so tiring. She has learning issues and it makes the teaching hard, and sometimes it sucks the joy right out of it.

 

But this year. I'm having so much fun :) OK, not everyday ;) but overall it's been a good year, and if I had to give up homeschooling next year I'd be sad. My stb 13yo has turned a huge corner, my 7yo is finally reading, and my 10yo has decided that school isn't that bad afterall. Go figure.

 

Give it until the middle of the summer and then make a decision. Maybe things won't look so bleak by then.

[OK Family]

IEW has a spelling program called phonetic zoo, which instructs your child with an audio cd. I am waiting for mine to arrive in the mail so I'm not sure exactly how it goes, but I'm excited for some help. There is a self paced online history program from Veritas press. You can view sample lessons online, very interesting class and she doesn't have to keep up with anyone.

:grouphug:

[tuzor]

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

She may have undiagnosed learning issues that may or may not be stemming from undiagnosed health issues? That would be overwhelming. I'd aim what energy you have left toward figuring those issues out, i.e., I vote strongly in favor of evaluations.

 

:iagree:Perhaps further evaluation will help you know how best to proceed.

 

 

HS is definately a labor of love. Take an extended break, how can you reduce some of self induced pressure.

 

This is not an answer but a bag of chocolate sounds like it may help you out a ton.

[LittleIzumi]

Schooling my ADHD one is exhausting, too. Some days I look up boarding schools. :lol: Is the ADD being addressed? :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

[hearts4homeschooling]

PLEASE tell me there is a good spelling program on CD rom.

 

Yes, The Phonetic Zoo by Excellence in Spelling. It is very independent (even reads the correct spelling to the student) and good for grades 5 and up. You can read about it on the Excellence in Writing website.

 

Teaching Textbooks for math? It has an automatic gradebook through Algebra 1 level with the higher levels being re-done with the automatic gradebook over the next few years.

 

Switched on Schoolhouse? We tried this one year but found the answers had to be pretty exact to be counted as correct, and this could be frustrating for a child with learning disabilities, but if their bend is computers, this might be a good fit.

 

BJU DVDs? You'd still be reviewing some work. The teachers do go over and correct some of the workbook pages with the student during the DVD lesson. Having used BJU DVDs for two years exclusively (every subject on DVD), I warn you about student burnout with watching so many classes. It begins to feel like PS. Also, BJU English is tough and would likely require your help even with the DVD teacher.

 

Science at that age can be an Animal Encyclopedia and book basket approach with nonfiction animal or other science books from the library.

 

History could be audio CDs of The Story of the World or Mystery of History along with audio or book biographies from the library.

 

You are tired. Are you getting enough vitamin D?

[Tap]

Have you considered a nanny? Someone you can train about Rad, and who can help you supervise her, while you work with dd12? I know it would be hard to find the right person to work with your ddrad, and there is the issue that she could lie but is there anyone you know/trust who could maybe step in a bit?

 

I can't imagine how hard it is to hs dd12 with keeping one eye on ddrad.

 

I remember the last year we homeschooled. DD13 was getting the short end of the stick due to dd5. She went from being one year ahead to barely at grade level. Not due to intelligence or learning delays, just that I couldn't put the time in that I needed to. That is when we put dd13 in private. I remember being stressed out to the point of being frozen. There were days that I just couldn't go on.

[MariannNOVA]

Change it up a little. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

Do you do a traditional school year? Maybe year round with more breaks would help?

 

Spend a set # of weeks (you decide) learning differently: field trips, literature, block scheduling. Anything that is different than what you are doing now.

 

When that happens to us (and it happens often), I go to block scheduling - we will do just writing or just Math or just History for about 3-4 weeks.

 

:grouphug:

[ktgrok]

I don't even know if my dd could keep up with an online program. I find that I help her so much.

 

We have been doing Rod and Staff grammar since grade 2. If anyone is familiar with the layout, it has the student do section A, B, C, D, Review and Practice, for example. It is different on each lesson. Anyway, sometimes A will have 1 - 5, B will have 1 - 15, C will have 1 - 10, D 1 - 8, R&P varies. She will do a few of A, a few of B, skip C, do some of D, skip R&P. Of the lessons she does, all too often she hasn't followed the directions properly. The direction thing is getting easier, but still...... it is just so exhausting. We have to hand papers back and forth many, many times for corrections. She will do some, hand in the paper, then I find she hasn't completed all of them........... so I don't even know if she could do an online course. She has come so far with everything but it truly has been a struggle.

 

I sometimes wonder if her learning difficulties are related to her undiagnosed health issues.

 

It seems so overwhelming. I try to stuff it all down but it always comes back.

 

I just don't know if I can outsource for her.

 

Maybe a cd rom program, like switched on schoolhouse, where she can't progress to the next section without answering the question first? It would force her not to skip them.

[Denisemomof4]

ok, I hope I can remember everything I wanted to respond to in this post.

 

I have not had dd evaluated with academic testing because she has gone through SO MUCH medical testing in her short life. She is a medical mystery and doesn't have a diagnosis for much of what she experiences. To complicate things, her symptoms and go every 3.5 years. I just noticed how her symptoms are slowing, if not stopping, and her learning is clearer and doing better. She will always struggle with ADD and there is nothing more I can do for her there. She can not take stimulants, is even supposed to avoid caffeinated beverages, because of one condition she has which is vasovagal syncope.

 

Tap, I can not hire a nanny. I hated having hired help in the home when we needed it for my mom. It is such a distraction. It would be hard for dd12 and I. I have gotten to a place where we do science and other reading out loud in the afternoons and RAD is sent to her room for quiet play, reading, book on tape, rest. Every afternoon whether we read or not. I just need a little break as does dd12. RAD actually is quiet during school time as she does her online schooling and will play online paint, etc. to fill her time if we need her to. I just have to have her right by me to make sure she isn't damaging anything.:glare: Our finances couldn't handle at the moment, either. Too many unexpected financial drains recently. :glare:

 

I can not school during the summer. It will never work for us. I need that break. I need to not have to worry about school At All for a period of time.

 

I did NOT know SOS would not allow the student to progress unless the previous question was answered! I am not sure how dd12 would do with something independent like that but perhaps it is time to try.

 

I have Sequential Spelling cd-rom and Phonetic Zoo sitting right here. I am considering one of them for next year. It looks like Phonetic Zoo is a popular choice here? I could also use that for dd9.

 

Thank you everyone. I know I need more ME time. I do get it fairly regularly, but i have so many big things going on that are burning me out. Or actually I think I've been burnt out for years and can't seem to recover. I am ANXIOUS for our summer break! We have 25 more lessons in R&S, and I am stopping our spelling once we're done with that. The drudgery work is almost over. :hurray:

[Denisemomof4]

She may have undiagnosed learning issues that may or may not be stemming from undiagnosed health issues? That would be overwhelming. I'd aim what energy you have left toward figuring those issues out, i.e., I vote strongly in favor of evaluations.

 

oh, and she has been undergoing testing, evaluations, etc. etc. for 8 years for medical diagnosis. Only recently are the questions including whether or not she has learning issues, and she is seeing all new TYPES of doctors this time.

 

Tomorrow we're going to a metabolic specialist who is also a neurologist. I expect no answers again. But we are going to a nature museum afterwards and will see raptors, song birds, all kinds of birds rescued in the wild. etc. there are walking trails, a gorge, etc. It will be our school day - science based.;) We are going alone and we are SO excited!

[almondbutterandjelly]

elearningk12 or time4learning might work well for her. Just wanted to mention that. :) I would turn to them before doing Switched on Schoolhouse. I think they are more ADD friendly.

[katilac]

She may have undiagnosed learning issues that may or may not be stemming from undiagnosed health issues? That would be overwhelming. I'd aim what energy you have left toward figuring those issues out, i.e., I vote strongly in favor of evaluations.

 

I strongly agree. I would not let the medical testing result in no academic testing. Yes, there is a chance that it could turn into the same merry-go-round with no results in sight, but there's a much better chance that you will get useful information quickly. If you don't, there will be nothing forcing you to keep going, kwim? But there are so very many issues that can be pinpointed with expert evaluation, and then they can help you focus on the most helpful interventions and strategies. Some undiagnosed issues can cause ongoing, time-sucking problems that can be easily addressed when the specific problem is known.

 

Most definitely, I would schedule one thorough evaluation, and then take it from there.

[momofsbandeg]

Take some time to do fun things and give yourself a break.

 

Don't beat yourself up over how you feel. You are a human being and we all get tired.

 

:grouphug:

[Denisemomof4]

I strongly agree. I would not let the medical testing result in no academic testing. Yes, there is a chance that it could turn into the same merry-go-round with no results in sight, but there's a much better chance that you will get useful information quickly. If you don't, there will be nothing forcing you to keep going, kwim? But there are so very many issues that can be pinpointed with expert evaluation, and then they can help you focus on the most helpful interventions and strategies. Some undiagnosed issues can cause ongoing, time-sucking problems that can be easily addressed when the specific problem is known.

 

Most definitely, I would schedule one thorough evaluation, and then take it from there.

 

the thing that is SO frustrating in confusing is that her learning issues come and go just as her medical issues. The learning issues, however, come and go day by day. The medical issues 3.5 years apart. I am SO afraid we will spend 2k, like we did for my younger son, and she will be tested on a good day, and then we will have wasted all that time and money.

 

I know the academic testing will exhaust her as it did ds. It is not something we can do right now. It is something we can plan on....

[Elinor Everywhere]

:grouphug::grouphug: Denise, I've been wanting to tell you for a long while that I avidly read your posts, pray for you, and think you are amazing. I have an adopted son from Ukraine, and although we were lucky, your posts sometimes break my heart and I just feel for you so, so much. I always consider it a miracle we didn't end up with a severe RAD child, and it was nothing we did - who can tell when they're putting on their "aren't I sweet" face to strangers?

 

ETA - I realize your 12yo isn't RAD, but I wanted to say what I always think when I read your other posts. I wish I could meet you in person!

 

I can only echo the others and encourage you to consider online/CD schooling for next year. Can you stop the R&S now? We used it for a few years, but had to stop by 5th grade because we couldn't take it any more. Now I just correct grammar issues as they come up in the kids' writing and speech.

 

Giving you lots of virtual hugs, and wishing I could help ease your load somehow....:grouphug:

[Denisemomof4]

:grouphug::grouphug: Denise, I've been wanting to tell you for a long while that I avidly read your posts, pray for you, and think you are amazing. I have an adopted son from Ukraine, and although we were lucky, your posts sometimes break my heart and I just feel for you so, so much. I always consider it a miracle we didn't end up with a severe RAD child, and it was nothing we did - who can tell when they're putting on their "aren't I sweet" face to strangers?

 

ETA - I realize your 12yo isn't RAD, but I wanted to say what I always think when I read your other posts. I wish I could meet you in person!

 

I can only echo the others and encourage you to consider online/CD schooling for next year. Can you stop the R&S now? We used it for a few years, but had to stop by 5th grade because we couldn't take it any more. Now I just correct grammar issues as they come up in the kids' writing and speech.

 

Giving you lots of virtual hugs, and wishing I could help ease your load somehow....:grouphug:

 

you are so sweet. thank you. My RAD dd breaks my heart. I know she is a big part of my burnout, but I can't let it affect dd12 like it has my other kids. So I constantly balance and regroup. It's exhausting.

 

thank you SO MUCH for your prayers.:grouphug::grouphug:

 

I'm SO glad your son is doing well, for you, your son, for your entire family!!!

 

I do think I need to outsource. I've done it myself all these years. This is my 10th year doing R&S. I want to perform my own lobotomy.:glare:;):lol:

[Denisemomof4]

:grouphug::grouphug: Denise, I've been wanting to tell you for a long while that I avidly read your posts, pray for you, and think you are amazing. I have an adopted son from Ukraine, and although we were lucky, your posts sometimes break my heart and I just feel for you so, so much. I always consider it a miracle we didn't end up with a severe RAD child, and it was nothing we did - who can tell when they're putting on their "aren't I sweet" face to strangers?

 

ETA - I realize your 12yo isn't RAD, but I wanted to say what I always think when I read your other posts. I wish I could meet you in person!

 

I can only echo the others and encourage you to consider online/CD schooling for next year. Can you stop the R&S now? We used it for a few years, but had to stop by 5th grade because we couldn't take it any more. Now I just correct grammar issues as they come up in the kids' writing and speech.

 

Giving you lots of virtual hugs, and wishing I could help ease your load somehow....:grouphug:

 

by the way, I don't know if I've ever shared this here before. When we went into this adoption journey, we had all intentions of going to Russia. We heard there were many Lithuanian speaking children in the Russian orphanages. Dh is 100% Lithuanian and I thought it would be a wonderful gift for him to be able to speak to our child in his/her native language. I did tell our social worker that the one thing I couldn't handle was mental illness :crying: so she steered us towards China. She said children from China typically do very well. Oh well. Nothing we can do about it now...............

 

:leaving:

[Elinor Everywhere]

by the way, I don't know if I've ever shared this here before. When we went into this adoption journey, we had all intentions of going to Russia. We heard there were many Lithuanian speaking children in the Russian orphanages. Dh is 100% Lithuanian and I thought it would be a wonderful gift for him to be able to speak to our child in his/her native language. I did tell our social worker that the one thing I couldn't handle was mental illness :crying: so she steered us towards China. She said children from China typically do very well. Oh well. Nothing we can do about it now...............

 

:leaving:

 

I do think statistically the social worker was correct - from what I've read, there are many, many Russian (and I'm sure, Ukrainian) kids with RAD. My son's mother drank heavily throughout her pregnancy & nursing, and I'm truly amazed my son doesn't have more issues than he does (he is ADD and has extremely slow verbal processing skills, but other than that he's "normal" although annoying in many ways). My brother adopted two girls from China - they were both between 12-14 months - one is perfectly fine, and one has slight cerebral palsy (they were told this while still in China, though after they had taken her with them for a few days). Neither has any sort of RAD, though. Luck of the draw?

[HiddenJewel]

I sometimes wonder if her learning difficulties are related to her undiagnosed health issues.

 

 

If she does have Lyme it could definitely affect her neurological system which could affect her learning.

 

I would be trying a change in the type of schooling - a totally different approach.

[Unicorn.]

Denise, Growing w/ Grammar is just like Rod and Staff, but secular and so, so much easier. I switched my girls 2 years ago and haven't looked back. They can do it on their own, and it doesn't take them as long to get it done. Let her unschool science and history. Focus on math, reading and writing, and give yourself a break. I promise you won't ruin her!

[Truscifi]

You have gotten plenty of good advice already - I second (or third, or whatever ;)) trying something online - so I just wanted to add :grouphug:. I am going into my 5th year next year, and for the first time am wondering if I can do it, mainly because I'm due to have a new baby in September. One month after we start school. :001_huh: I know lots of moms do it, I'm just not sure I can. :001_unsure:

 

Sorry to hijack. I know what you are dealing with is very different. Just needed to get that off my chest I guess. Anyway, more :grouphug: for you!

[TheApprentice]

oh, and she has been undergoing testing, evaluations, etc. etc. for 8 years for medical diagnosis. Only recently are the questions including whether or not she has learning issues, and she is seeing all new TYPES of doctors this time.

 

Tomorrow we're going to a metabolic specialist who is also a neurologist. I expect no answers again. But we are going to a nature museum afterwards and will see raptors, song birds, all kinds of birds rescued in the wild. etc. there are walking trails, a gorge, etc. It will be our school day - science based.;) We are going alone and we are SO excited!

 

I know this is a Classical education site, but maybe more days should resemble this for a little while. Science/history videos and books, journaling for creative writing, reading classical books and writing everyday about what she's read, or just talking about it. Listening to music, drawing and painting what she chooses. You could even talk with her and tell her things will be different for a while, and what would she want to do. I would probably continue math daily, but everything else would look a little more relaxed.

 

Nothing can move forward without you being "healthy". :grouphug:

[Pink Fairy]

:grouphug:'s to you, Denise. I totally get it. I've never loved homeschooling, and I do it because I feel like I have to. Public school is simply not an option. But today, for the first time EVER, I thought that I might actually end up putting one child--a particular child, if you get me--into school, simply because I am sick and tired of the drama. Sick, I tell you! But PS would be a disaster for him, more than any of my other kids even, so I soldier on. Bitterly, some days. Ugh, I'm rambling, but I just wanted to commiserate even if I don't make sense while I'm doing it.

[datgh]

You list your location as NH. Have you thought about trying the Virtual Learning academy? It is free to NH residents. Ok your taxes are paying for it but it won't cost you anything extra to try. Your child is assigned a teacher that they answer to. They do have a pace chart that is suggested with the class which we try to follow but if your child is having trouble etc. they will stop the pace to make sure the child understands the material before moving on. You have a month to decide if you want to keep going. I don't know if that applies to the middle school classes though. Since they aren't for credit. they really can't take any away if you drop the class. I was dealing with some burn out myself and it has been so nice to outsource a class I really don't care to teach. It has been a nice change for us. http://www.vlacs.org

[Denisemomof4]

You have gotten plenty of good advice already - I second (or third, or whatever ;)) trying something online - so I just wanted to add :grouphug:. I am going into my 5th year next year, and for the first time am wondering if I can do it, mainly because I'm due to have a new baby in September. One month after we start school. :001_huh: I know lots of moms do it, I'm just not sure I can. :001_unsure:

 

Sorry to hijack. I know what you are dealing with is very different. Just needed to get that off my chest I guess. Anyway, more :grouphug: for you!

 

I found the hardest time was when the baby started to crawl and get into everything. I had to get creative and we somehow got through it.

[Denisemomof4]

:grouphug:'s to you, Denise. I totally get it. I've never loved homeschooling, and I do it because I feel like I have to. Public school is simply not an option. But today, for the first time EVER, I thought that I might actually end up putting one child--a particular child, if you get me--into school, simply because I am sick and tired of the drama. Sick, I tell you! But PS would be a disaster for him, more than any of my other kids even, so I soldier on. Bitterly, some days. Ugh, I'm rambling, but I just wanted to commiserate even if I don't make sense while I'm doing it.

 

 

you are singing my tune.

 

You list your location as NH. Have you thought about trying the Virtual Learning academy? It is free to NH residents. Ok your taxes are paying for it but it won't cost you anything extra to try. Your child is assigned a teacher that they answer to. They do have a pace chart that is suggested with the class which we try to follow but if your child is having trouble etc. they will stop the pace to make sure the child understands the material before moving on. You have a month to decide if you want to keep going. I don't know if that applies to the middle school classes though. Since they aren't for credit. they really can't take any away if you drop the class. I was dealing with some burn out myself and it has been so nice to outsource a class I really don't care to teach. It has been a nice change for us. http://www.vlacs.org

 

I was looking through the class selections today. I have been considering this option, but I have fears of getting PS involved. She really is not a bad student, but when she has days where she understands nothing, even things we've supposedly mastered, what can happen with another teacher, one working for the state of NH, involved? Another thing that concerns me is that when we do our reading, I will ask her to explain something, explain what we just read. She simply is NOT CAPABLE of doing this. If, however, I pepper her with tons of questions, she can answer them all.:confused: SO I don't know about getting ps involved. Maybe if we do academic evaluations/testing and get a diagnosis I won't be so worried about this.

 

I guess I got turned off when a friend of mine went to the school because she wanted to have testing done on her dd13. The school told her that she needed to be enrolled full time, they said they'd have to come observe her schooling in the home, look through her school work.......... I don't know, something just left me feeling unsettled.

 

I do have another friend who uses VLACS and is happy with it. Are you?

[WhatLight]

I have no new advice that hasn't already been posted here, just wanted to let you know that you'll be in my thoughts. :grouphug:

[Lizzie in Ma]

:grouphug::grouphug:

I feel for you and hope you can find something that works that doesn't break your spirit.

[CalicoKat]

how do you get yourself out of this?

 

I can't ever put my dd's in school. Dd12 gets sick from the lights, dd9 - never.

 

I feel trapped! I just don't want to be responsible for anyone's education anymore. But I know I have to be.

 

I have been at this for 14 years. I never, ever intended to homeschool! I will be 50 next year and I'm just TIRED.

 

How does one get out of a slump like this??!!!!!

 

I absolutely cherish the time I have with dd12. I will cherish it because I know how quickly the time flies by! I love having her home with me. I just don't want to be a teacher anymore. Not in the academic sense. She has some sort of learning issue, if only pretty severe ADD. I do not do rigorous, classical studies with her like I did with my boys. She is totally average and I am fine with that. I just find teaching her EXHAUSTING. I am throwing in the towel with formal grammar studies. She has had more than ANY ps kid, and she has done more diagramming than any ps kid ever will. They don't even diagram in ps anymore. And spelling? PLEASE tell me there is a good spelling program on CD rom.

 

Dd9 does online school so that is easier for me.

 

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. I really hope I can snap out of this. I have been feeling it for at least a couple of years but I don't think I have openly admitted it to anyone. Not even here.

 

Dr. Aardsma's Spelling drills on CD!

 

I know what you're saying about being tired. Since you'll be doing this for a few more years you CAN take a few days off for you.

[Jenny in Florida]

I have no wisdom, but I wanted to let you know you are not alone.

 

I have only one schooling now, but I'm just tired of the whole thing. Before Christmas break, I was so sure I was done that I actually cleaned out my binder and tossed the lesson plans for the remainder of the year into the recycling bin. I had every intention of dropping my son at the middle school down the road bright and early the Monday morning that school resumed.

 

After a lot of heart-to-heart discussions with my husband, though, and some time over break to think, I remembered why I don't send this kid to school.

 

He's very bright. He's very intense. He's a big ball of goo, emotionally, that he does his best to hide under the toughest exterior he can fake. He loves tap dancing and theatre. He loves to learn but hates school, and he's a master at flying under the radar, doing just enough to avoid getting noticed.

 

School, for this one, would be a disaster.

 

At the beginning of the year, in response to my burnout and his resistance to anything that looked like work, I opted to set aside most of my lesson plans and focus on just three subjects: Spanish, English and math. We put in place some guidelines for how he was to spend his time in the afternoons unschooling other subjects. I felt so hopeful. I envisioned loosening up even more next year, watching him rediscover learning for fun . . .

 

He crashed and burned. When I asked him for less, he did even less than he had done before. I was still picking at him all day, every day, trying to get him to meet the minimal requirements we'd agreed on just a few months before. It got to the point at which he wasn't even reliably completing the daily assignments in the three core subjects. Plus, we were arguing all the time.

 

I once again got to the I. Can't. Do. This. Anymore. stage.

 

So, now we're back to a very structured, me-intensive approach. Rather than giving him all of his assignments for the week, I give him a sheet with every single thing broken down into specific daily chunks. In order to make sure he's actually doing the reading he's assigned, I spend every weekend typing up fill-in-the-blank and short-answer worksheets for three subjects. I do all of his Spanish lessons with him, stopping frequenly to quiz and make sure he gets it as we go along. Lessons that should take 45 minutes usually take almost twice that, and I'm so stressed by the time we finally finish that I begin to wish I drank.

 

I hate it. I, too, feel trapped. I just want to be done.

 

By the way, we tried the online thing last year. It was for different reasons, but we signed him up for a full slate of FLVS courses. He got through them with very good grades, but I can't tell that he actually learned anything except for how to game the system.

 

I wish I had something helpful to say, some magic words that would make it better for you. Unfortunately, all I can offer is sympathy and the knowledge that you are not alone.

[Chris in VA]

Just wanted to give you a :grouphug:.

You are one of my very favorite posters here, and I so admire you. Thanks for being real. Thanks for sharing your heart. You give me such a lovely example of perseverence, even when you feel you can't go on.

I'll be in prayer for you.

No advice, just another :grouphug:.

[G5052]

I wish I had something helpful to say, some magic words that would make it better for you. Unfortunately, all I can offer is sympathy and the knowledge that you are not alone.

 

I'm there too. I have come to understand completely why my friends with kids the same ages as mine are bailing in droves. We're old and tired. We've given ourselves to our children for years.

 

I love mine. I love education. But the underlying motivation has waned. So I suck up and keep going because it is what I want for our family.

[Princess Peach]

SO I don't know about getting ps involved. Maybe if we do academic evaluations/testing and get a diagnosis I won't be so worried about this.

 

I guess I got turned off when a friend of mine went to the school because she wanted to have testing done on her dd13. The school told her that she needed to be enrolled full time, they said they'd have to come observe her schooling in the home, look through her school work.......... I don't know, something just left me feeling unsettled.

 

I just wanted to respond to this point. We are in NH, too, FWIW. We had DS8 evaluated at our ps last Fall, particularly for reading difficulties. They did want to see curricula we had tried (and I brought the whole shebang in!). They wanted to make sure it was a scientifically based program (their words). They also did a home observation, which went very well. I figure they need to know this stuff because they didn't know us from Adam when we first walked in.

 

I knew I had tried everything I could and that I was doing everything I should be doing, so I wasn't worried about giving them the info and the peek into what we do. There were some blips with the meetings, which I won't bore you with, however it ended on a good note. They were pleased with what I was doing and even said that hs'ing was the best option for him. I was also lucky because our case manager had a SIL that hs'ed her 4 children and so she had a very positive outlook on hs'ing.

 

Also, as long as you are compliant with state law and not on probation, the school cannot tell you that you must enroll your child. They can recommend it, but you can just as easily nod your head, walk out, and never look back. In fact, as a hs parent, you can bow out at any time during the evals.

 

Sorry for the book, lol. I just wanted to give you another perspective. Feel free to PM me if you like.

 

:grouphug: