Marie in Oh Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 you were shopping in the commissary with your 6 children, visibly pregnant with your 7th, minding your own business, children acting beautifully, and a snotty old lady came up to you in the water aisle and said, taking on most snotty voice here ; "I hope they aren't all yours." I will tell you my reply after I hear from you. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CookieMonster Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Off the top of my head, the first brilliant thing I can think of is to smile and say, as cheerily as possible, that they are. I mean, what else am I gonna say? And I'm not of the mind to be rude in return. And where would she go from there? I'm sure if I had time, I could come up with something witty. Even still, I'd be afraid of offending her or escalating the situation, so I probably wouldn't use the line anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom2legomaniacs Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 One thing that popped to mind rather quickly was, "Oh no. Shhhh, I stole them." ;) ETA: I wouldn't say that. I don't think on the spot all that well in situations like that. It came to mind as kind of funny right now, but likely I would say something like, "Well, of course they're mine." or something equally less clever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer in MI Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I think I would've been so surprised at the comment that I would've just said something like, "Well, yes, as a matter of fact, they are!" But, I'm sure there are some other more witty comments! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5sweeties Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I had this same thing happen to me several times when preggers with my littlest. I usually said something like, "Yes, they are, and I am blessed to have each and every one of them in my life." Normally, these statements were made when all my children were present, and I always was much more concerned with how they felt about the comment than anything else. I always want them to know how much mamma loves them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I would have said, "yes they are, thank you" and kept walking. I had that exact incident happen with me (at the time there were 4 children and I was pregnant). Only the "lady" (about 70) stood in front of me, glared at me, mentally counted my children, then proceeded to break the third commandment with a drawn out disgusted voice. I was stunned, she moved on. I'm used to elderly people coming up and commenting on how I have my hands full or how well behaved my children are...but the audacity of that particular woman! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wagnfun Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 you were shopping in the commissary with your 6 children, visibly pregnant with your 7th, minding your own business, children acting beautifully, and a snotty old lady came up to you in the water aisle and said, taking on most snotty voice here ; "I hope they aren't all yours." I will tell you my reply after I hear from you. ;) Been there heard that & I give the same type of response even when they weren't all mine! (kids constantly have friends with us).. My reply is usually an animated and semi sarcastic-- "oh heavens I HOPE not, but I'm beginning to wonder why they always following me around calling me mommy and expect me to feed them. Thank heavens the government gives tax deductions right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rich with Kids Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 To: Are they all yours? "They all keep callin' me 'mom', so I'm thinkin' yes." My reply for, "Don't you know what causes that?" : "Yes. And he's really good at it!" :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3lilreds in NC Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 One thing that popped to mind rather quickly was, "Oh no. Shhhh, I stole them." ;) :smilielol5: I believe we are kindred spirits! Wow. I can't believe people say that kind of stuff. Aren't they only supposed to do that in the movies? My goodness. I think I would have said something like "Why, yes, they are. Aren't they wonderful?" Unless I were feeling particularly snarky, in which case, I might say "What is WRONG with you?" OK, I don't know if I could actually say that. My face would say it for me though. I don't hide my feelings well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Look around at the all the children and say in your best shocked voice, "Where did you come from? Stop calling me mom. Who are you people? Please stop following me." And then look at her and smile and say "I don't know why this happens every time I go out in public. Children just start following me." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Look around at the all the children and say in your best shocked voice, "Where did you come from? Stop calling me mom. Who are you people? Please stop following me." And then look at her and smile and say "I don't know why this happens every time I go out in public. Children just start following me." Oh this is the best!! I probably would have looked at her and said "Yes they're mine, do you have a problem with that?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plaid Dad Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 It's hardly witty or gracious - and I don't deal with negative comments about family size - but my response to insufferable rudeness is generally a level stare, a raised eyebrow, and in my coldest voice, "Pardon me?" Then I give them a small, arch smile as I watch them backpedal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PariSarah Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Partly because I don't think quickly enough on my feet to come up with something really clever. And partly because it's so danged effective. It forces people to go one of two directions: back off, because they don't know what you're capable of, or dig in and get really nasty, which gives you all sorts of options. If they go with B, I sometimes stall for a little more time by asking, "I'm sorry, did you just say ___________?" That tends to send all but the really foolish running. So what did YOU say???? :bigear: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie in Oh Posted June 5, 2008 Author Share Posted June 5, 2008 I was in a snarky mood. I usually try to be gracious but it is REALLLLLLY hard. Especially 20 weeks pregnant. My kids get super tired of comments, positive or negative. My oldest wants to know why we can't go anywhere without people saying something. Anyway. . . My reply, "Well, I hope so. I don't think I picked up any on the side of the road." Here is the rest of the story: Three aisles later she caught up to me and aplogized. SHe said that she had known when it came out that it was the wrong thing to say, that they were adorable, well behaved, etc. etc. I apologized too for my curt reply and explained that we receive rude comments every time we go somewhere and grow a bit weary of it, that we think our children are blessings, and we are glad to have them. She then launched into how her daughter was into the prolife movement, etc. etc. I smiled and contiuned my shopping. At the sushi counter my son apologized to me for her-- "I am sorry Mom, she was really rude, huh?" He knows how I despise those comments. So that is that. I hate being snarky, but it gets to the point of being rediculous, YKWIM? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 :iagree: Same here. Partly because I don't think quickly enough on my feet to come up with something really clever. And partly because it's so danged effective. It forces people to go one of two directions: back off, because they don't know what you're capable of, or dig in and get really nasty, which gives you all sorts of options. If they go with B, I sometimes stall for a little more time by asking, "I'm sorry, did you just say ___________?" That tends to send all but the really foolish running. So what did YOU say???? :bigear: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizzyBee Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I'm not quick on my feet, but my dh came up with a good one: Yes, they are, and the others are with their father. I really like the one about finding your filter. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momofkhm Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I'm just not that quick but what about "Why are you missing some? Maybe they made friends with mine." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Yes, they're all mine, but all mine aren't here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "I'm sorry, my name isn't Shirley. Oh, and yes they are, why?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PariSarah Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "I hope you find the filter that goes between your brain and your mouth". :lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5Youngs Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 To: Are they all yours? "They all keep callin' me 'mom', so I'm thinkin' yes." My reply for, "Don't you know what causes that?" : "Yes. And he's really good at it!" :D I almost spit my coffee all over my computer screen! I'm gonna laugh about this for days....... Thanks for the anti-aging treatment~ Dawanna ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I would have said "they sure are, everytime I drink this water I have another one" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissel Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I was in a snarky mood. I usually try to be gracious but it is REALLLLLLY hard. Especially 20 weeks pregnant. My kids get super tired of comments, positive or negative. My oldest wants to know why we can't go anywhere without people saying something. Anyway. . . My reply, "Well, I hope so. I don't think I picked up any on the side of the road." Here is the rest of the story: Three aisles later she caught up to me and aplogized. SHe said that she had known when it came out that it was the wrong thing to say, that they were adorable, well behaved, etc. etc. I apologized too for my curt reply and explained that we receive rude comments every time we go somewhere and grow a bit weary of it, that we think our children are blessings, and we are glad to have them. She then launched into how her daughter was into the prolife movement, etc. etc. I smiled and contiuned my shopping. At the sushi counter my son apologized to me for her-- "I am sorry Mom, she was really rude, huh?" He knows how I despise those comments. So that is that. I hate being snarky, but it gets to the point of being rediculous, YKWIM? Nicely done! I can never think of anything appropriately snarky in time to respond. And I do think questions like that deserve snarky answers--though I don't think yours was over the top at all :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa at Home Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 She obviously doesn't have the patience or the character to undertake such a noble life. ~Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlockOfSillies Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "I'm certainly glad they're not all yours, with that attitude." :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camibami Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 :D Glad it turned out well in the end! Everytime I go to the commissary, be it alone or with my paltry 2, we meet grouchy elderly people. Something about the commissary just turns anyone over 60 into a maniac, I think. DH practically refuses to go anymore, even though it makes sense since it saves gas for him to go on the way home. Someday when I have more time I am going to really investigate this phenomenon- I am leaning towards the free coffee being tainted, because they all gather around the free coffee. And complain REALLY loud if it runs out. The free coffee- watch out. I often take the 3 next door places with us, and we get *so* many comments! And thats only 5- 5 isn't a "large"family, IMO. I can only imagine what you get! Cami Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cin Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "I'm certainly glad they're not all yours, with that attitude." :glare: Now see, I was thinking something like that, but couldn't get it into the right words. I LOVE that one. Absolutely LOVE it. It puts the focus on the OTHER person's behavior, which is where it SHOULD be. It is NO ONE's business how many kids you have. (Unless, of course, they are running like banshees through the produce section!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Krista in LA Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I think I would have said, "Yes, and the other 6 are at their grandparent's." :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
6packofun Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 hh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
battlemaiden Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I was in a snarky mood. I usually try to be gracious but it is REALLLLLLY hard. Especially 20 weeks pregnant. My kids get super tired of comments, positive or negative. My oldest wants to know why we can't go anywhere without people saying something. Anyway. . . My reply, "Well, I hope so. I don't think I picked up any on the side of the road." Here is the rest of the story: Three aisles later she caught up to me and aplogized. SHe said that she had known when it came out that it was the wrong thing to say, that they were adorable, well behaved, etc. etc. I apologized too for my curt reply and explained that we receive rude comments every time we go somewhere and grow a bit weary of it, that we think our children are blessings, and we are glad to have them. She then launched into how her daughter was into the prolife movement, etc. etc. I smiled and contiuned my shopping. At the sushi counter my son apologized to me for her-- "I am sorry Mom, she was really rude, huh?" He knows how I despise those comments. So that is that. I hate being snarky, but it gets to the point of being rediculous, YKWIM? Your son is sweet. I don't think I could have thought of anything at the moment. I would have stood blinking at her processing if I really heard her correctly. But I give you big, virtual, pregnant belly hugs. Wouldn't we be a sight walking with our families together? That woman's rude comment would never have been heard. ;) When are you coming to Hawaii!!!!!! Jo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DIY-DY Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 you were shopping in the commissary with your 6 children, visibly pregnant with your 7th, minding your own business, children acting beautifully, and a snotty old lady came up to you in the water aisle and said, taking on most snotty voice here ; "I hope they aren't all yours." I will tell you my reply after I hear from you. ;) It does get exhausting, doesn't it? Our eldest will now answer for me if he senses that I'm just not up to full-graciousness level when someone decides to take the tacky route to small-talk. He bounces up and says, "Oh, yes, we're ALL HERS, and she wouldn't trade us for the world!" If he's feeling particularly dramatic, he'll then foist a hug or a kiss on one of his siblings and grin his big, contagious grin. It's nice to have backup, isn't it? FWIW, we've had that same question asked, and I have to admit that I don't think we have that many, so I always do a double-take to see if we did, somehow, pick up strays. (Once, we did - no clue where he came from, but there was one in the bunch who wasn't mine. I claimed him, anyway.) My basic answer is, "Um, I'm pretty sure, yeah." Although I have to say I love Plaid Dad's composed and firm, "Pardon me." I'm going to have to try that the next time I'm just not up for being nice about it. Dy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nukeswife Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Loved your response. I also think "did you happen to loose the filter between your brain and mouth" is priceless. I only have 3 kids and our biggest problem is that the first two are a boy and a girl so most people we run into think our 3rd (another boy) was an accident because as we've heard "You have one of each why would you want more" to which I usually say "He was very much planned and why wouldn't you want more" My kids are usually very well behaved and I in no way think 3 kids makes a large family. I truly admire those of you with more, we'd probably have more if we didn't have to move so much, it's already hard to find a house we fit in every time the Navy moves us. I've also noticed being military we tend to have what's considered "larger than average families" which I think is great. Congrats on your composure and to your son for what he said. Sounds like you have a really great bunch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkTulip Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I usually just look at the person and say, "Wow! Really?" It turns the tables and often makes the other person think about what they just said. We get comments like this a lot, because I have 4 boys within a 5 year age span. Lots of people ask if they're all mine, nearly everytime we go anywhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "Really? Why not?" With a very sweet smile to accompany my words. And leave her there to look ridiculous as she probably wouldn't have expected to be asked to explain herself. I am glad it worked out the way it did, it is nice to see people have the courage to apologize and to graciously accept apologies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue in MD Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 why, yes they are. Aren't I blessed? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reya Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "I suppose it does surprise people, since bad mothers can scarcely keep a handle on two, and SO many mothers are just so incompetent these days." If I were feeling really, really mean.... *g* More likely, I'd say, "Whyever would you hope that?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragons in the flower bed Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 taking on most snotty voice here ;"I hope they aren't all yours." "Oh, no! This one hatched from an egg this one found, and this one came with our house. Those two sprouted from their father's forehead full grown. This one walked out of the fridge one day; I told my husband to throw out that old egg salad." Pointing to my belly, "This one's all mine, though. Well, mine and The Great Lord Snorzak's." I love rude strangers, evangelists and telemarketers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momto5 Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I have 5 children in a wide array of beautiful colors (some are bio and some are our former foster children). My greatest sadness when someone makes negative comments like the one that lady made to you is that they have hurt my children or made my children feel shamed or embarrassed. That is just wrong. Our children hear these comments and they listen for our responses. I try to keep this in mind when I respond. Often what I WANT to say is not what I actually say. Although it is fun to fantasize about actually saying the less charitable responses! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenschooler Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 you were shopping in the commissary with your 6 children, visibly pregnant with your 7th, minding your own business, children acting beautifully, and a snotty old lady came up to you in the water aisle and said, taking on most snotty voice here ; "I hope they aren't all yours." I will tell you my reply after I hear from you. ;) Oh, so many choices. Let's see... "No, these are all foster children." "We have eleven more at home." "Yep, all mine. I'm trying to increase the percentage of kind, loving people. There are just so many hateful and judgemental people out there, dontcha think?" "They were wandering around in the parking lot and looked hungry, so I gathered them up. I have no idea who their parents are." Those would be my nice responses. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowWhite Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 I like your reply, and depending on your tone, it sounds pretty good-natured. But I'm sassy like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 you were shopping in the commissary with your 6 children, visibly pregnant with your 7th, minding your own business, children acting beautifully, and a snotty old lady came up to you in the water aisle and said, taking on most snotty voice here ; "I hope they aren't all yours." I will tell you my reply after I hear from you. ;) I HOPE I would have first said, 'why?' And then gone from there. Rude woman. Grrrrr..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenschooler Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Been there heard that & I give the same type of response even when they weren't all mine! (kids constantly have friends with us).. I used to babysit several kids, back when I only had two, and the kids were all closely spaced in age (some even the same age). I had two 3 yr. old girls, three 5 yr. old girls, a 6 yr. old boy, and two 8 yr. old girls. They would always pretend they were siblings if anyone asked (I didn't put them up to it, honestly!) I didn't jump in and correct it, either. It was just too much fun to watch people try to figure out in their heads if I'd had a baby every nine months, or which ones might be twins. I loved taking them all out to the zoo or park and watching people shake their heads in amazement. When I was pregnant with dd#3, people really couldn't believe their eyes. It was a HUGE eye-opener for me. I couldn't believe how rude people could be over the fact that someone had several children. And mine were a happy bunch. I felt like I was on a mission to overcome the prejudice people have against large familes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenschooler Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "Oh, yes, we're ALL HERS, and she wouldn't trade us for the world!" That's got to be the perfect response. What a wonderful boy. (Once, we did - no clue where he came from, but there was one in the bunch who wasn't mine. I claimed him, anyway.) :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beansprouts Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 "Yep, all mine. I'm trying to increase the percentage of kind, loving people. There are just so many hateful and judgemental people out there, dontcha think?" Perfect! :thumbup1: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aubrey Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 Well, I got the, "Are these ALL yours??" again the other day. Dd1 was screaming (which she never does in public, so I was a little embarrassed & panicked), & I was trying desperately to pack up our stuff. "Yes," I said. "And you're about to have a 5th???" she asked incredulously. I looked up to see if I *had* picked one up on the side of the road, lol. She got a rather snippy, "4th," though, & she was still re-counting when we left. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted June 6, 2008 Share Posted June 6, 2008 " and this one came with our house. . :smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pegasus Posted June 6, 2008 Share Posted June 6, 2008 "Just keep hoping." I still feel pretty bad about putting my foot in my mouth when we first moved here and I met our neighbors. She had 3 very active little boys and commented on expecting another one in several months. My thoughtless response was "Wow, really?" Still, I guess it was much worse when a friend told me she was expecting her first child and that it would be a girl. I asked if they had a name picked out and she said "Yes, Tallulah." and I burst out laughing. I honestly thought she was joking. Oops. :001_huh: Pegasus Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacy in NJ Posted June 6, 2008 Share Posted June 6, 2008 you were shopping in the commissary with your 6 children, visibly pregnant with your 7th, minding your own business, children acting beautifully, and a snotty old lady came up to you in the water aisle and said, taking on most snotty voice here ; "I hope they aren't all yours." I will tell you my reply after I hear from you. ;) "Why, Do you want some?":tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted June 6, 2008 Share Posted June 6, 2008 you were shopping in the commissary with your 6 children, visibly pregnant with your 7th, minding your own business, children acting beautifully, and a snotty old lady came up to you in the water aisle and said, taking on most snotty voice here ; "I hope they aren't all yours." I will tell you my reply after I hear from you. ;) I know you have too many littles to do this for real, as they would not understand, but I would be tempted to make a deal with them that whenever someone asked the question with just a tiny little bit too much attitude, you would turn around, look startled, and yell, "I told you dingdang kids to go back to your mamas and stop following me around the store!" Yeah, no. But one can dream. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Testimony Posted June 6, 2008 Share Posted June 6, 2008 "Yes! I bought them here at the comissary why do you think I come here so often?":lol: No, I would probably have really ignored her and pretended I did not hear her. Blessings in your homeschooling journey! Karen http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/testimony Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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