Sevilla Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I recently found this blog about how to have flattering jeans. The photos really made me think twice about pocket placement for sure. The author's writing style is pretty funny - and I love that she helped her 50+ mom find flattering non-mom jeans too. How mom jeans make you look 30 lbs heavier and your butt 2x as big A few months ago during one of our more “social†small group gatherings (in which all of the guys tend to gravitate to the kitchen to be closest to the snacks while the girls sit in the living room where they can talk about “girl stuffâ€), Lydia shared with us a deep fear that has been seated in her heart for a long time. Being that she is in her early 30′s, the possibility of it coming to pass was getting closer and closer. She was sorely afraid – nay, terrified even – of attaining the dreaded “long butt†that seems to happen to moms in their mid-30′s or early 40′s. She said that she didn’t mind if she had a little extra curvature, a.k.a. junk in tha trunk, but she just didn’t want her butt to get LONG. I quickly jumped in, because, you see, I often ponder about deep issues such as this. I told her that Long Butt is not a “condition†that some women contract – butts don’t elongate. It’s actually all about the jeans. And, to be more specific, the pocket placement on the jeans. It is a symptom completely avoidable by ensuring proper knowledge in how to outfit one’s butt. Part 2: New Studies Prove that Replacing Mom Jeans Can Result in Surgery-Free Liposuction In my last post on Mom Jeans, I promised to show you that it can be done – you can be an older, or more “mature†Mom and not have to wear Mom Jeans. In fact, my aim was to show that someone who already admittedly wears dreadful Mom Jeans can be miraculously transformed simply by wearing the right cut of denim. My Mom had agreed to be my subject for this before the first post was published, but I was afraid she would back out after seeing the graphic detail that I included in my project. However, when I saw her at a family lunch the day after it posted, she told me she was ready to go the next day. So we promised to meet at the research facility the next morning. Then I got nervous. What if I couldn’t pull this off? What if she hopelessly had The Dreaded Long Butt and my theories were wrong? What if it truly was not avoidable in some cases? Oh, the anxiety was gripping. But I was relieved, delighted, and a wee bit shocked at the outcome of our research. So, without further ado, here is my report. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommee & Baba Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 NO mom jeans here! I refuse to fall into that bracket!! My dh is always commenting on me and telling me that I don't need to wear the same style of jeans as the teenagers wear....:lol: and my reply is "WHY NOT"?!! and he just chuckles and says that he's glad I have some fashion sense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I try to wear cute-butt jeans, but they often come paired with muffin tops or butt-crack shows. I have a couple cute-butt jeans right now, but they are too big after I have them on for 10 minutes and I am constantly pulling up my jeans. Don't say the word "belt" because that pretty much guarantees muffin top. The only solution to that mid section roll is a visit to Dr. 90210. Losing 20 lbs and getting to a healthy weight did nothing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sevilla Posted October 28, 2011 Author Share Posted October 28, 2011 I try to wear cute-butt jeans, but they often come paired with muffin tops or butt-crack shows. I have a couple cute-butt jeans right now, but they are too big after I have them on for 10 minutes and I am constantly pulling up my jeans. Don't say the word "belt" because that pretty much guarantees muffin top. The only solution to that mid section roll is a visit to Dr. 90210. Losing 20 lbs and getting to a healthy weight did nothing. Two words: SHAPEWEAR (Spanx, Flexees, Assets by Spanx at Target) and PILATES - losing weight won't pull in the transverse abdominal muscles, but pilates exercises are a.m.a.z.i.n.g. - they work far better than any sort of ab workout I have ever done. (Though I find for me that a belt prevents muffin top b/c if I wear a chunky belt it gives my stomach more space above in the jeans) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I think there is something wrong with me. I liked one pair of the mom jeans the best out of all the options - not *most* of them (gag) but my favorite was a mom jean. Am I the only one that notices that some of the non-mom jeans give a saggy looking butt? I don't like saggy butt either. I don't know why that's preferable to a long butt especially when those pants typically have you also dealing with the muffin top and the butt crack issue. But I've never been accused of being a fashionista. :D I will take care not to show my socks though. eww. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) I do not buy jeans that: Make me look like I am wearing an adult diaper Have a waist that is higher than my natural hip (I have 1.5" between my hip and rib cage and do not wish to be tied like a sausage in that little area) Have pockets disproportionate to the tuchas - either gigantic or teeny-tiny, they make the space back there appear HUGE Have pockets that rest on the backs of my legs, partially or entirely Have elastic. I'm sorry, I am not a toddler or pregnant, and I have opposable thumbs. Bunch. Anywhere. Tight ankles, knees, behind... just no. (this rules out ON jeans for me, "reverse" cut, and anything labeled "skinny") Have lycra. They grab/bunch in crazy places and spend the day sliding down my hiney to give the diaper butt with misplaced pockets look. :ack2: I also rule out pre-fab "wear" with as much prejudice as painted on "grill marks". Eta: I liked the dark wash Levi's but I have the same problem they described: waist seems to bear no relation to the size of the rest of the pants. They are squeezing the life out of you if you try a skin tight 6 or a 16 you're positively swimming in. Edited October 28, 2011 by MyCrazyHouse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Two words: SHAPEWEAR (Spanx, Flexees, Assets by Spanx at Target) and PILATES - losing weight won't pull in the transverse abdominal muscles, but pilates exercises are a.m.a.z.i.n.g. - they work far better than any sort of ab workout I have ever done. (Though I find for me that a belt prevents muffin top b/c if I wear a chunky belt it gives my stomach more space above in the jeans) Wow!! That's a lot of work. I'm tired already. Pass the mom jeans. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TKDmom Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 That was the best blog post I've read in a long time! :lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacia Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 :lol: Great info. I need to get another pair of jeans soon. I'm going to use these guidelines. Thanks for posting! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Sorry, but I am over 50 and Mom jeans are the only thing that is comfy. I figure if folks don't like to see my mom butt, they can look elsewhere. Amanda jeans by Gloria Vanderbilt. That's it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pdalley Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Sorry, but I am over 50 and Mom jeans are the only thing that is comfy. I figure if folks don't like to see my mom butt, they can look elsewhere. Amanda jeans by Gloria Vanderbilt. That's it. :iagree: 44 but if I could find Mom jeans I'd wear them. Wore them even when I wasn't a Mom in the 80's. I do not like the look of jeans these days. And in my case until those low slung jeans come with a wide load sign for my ample butt I'm not buying them.:tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trish Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 The first subject does NOT look like a size 6. The second does not look like a size 8. They both look larger, to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyCrazyMama Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Wow!! That's a lot of work. I'm tired already. Pass the mom jeans. :D :iagree: My thoughts exactly!:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sevilla Posted October 28, 2011 Author Share Posted October 28, 2011 The first subject does NOT look like a size 6. The second does not look like a size 8. They both look larger, to me. I would guess they shop at places with vanity sizing - I wear at least 2 sizes smaller at places like Kohls, Target and Old Navy than I do at higher end stores that have more old fashioned sizing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whereneverever Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 :lol::lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DianeW88 Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 NO mom jeans!!! Ever!!! There is simply no need to do this to yourself. The funniest part of that post was the "Grandma" jeans. "If you can't tell your front from your back, you are off the Grandma jeans deep end." :lol: :lol: :lol: Go for the cute butt, ladies. Avoid mom jeans!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenangelcat Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Where do you even buy mom jeans? I wear normal jeans. You can wear modern jeans that aren't super low cut. If they aren't comfortable or you have muffin top than try a different brand. If you are curvy, you'll have to look harder to find the right fit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I wear something like this. I have them in deep blue and in black (the black has faded nicely). I wear them long with flats. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sevilla Posted October 28, 2011 Author Share Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) Where do you even buy mom jeans? I wear normal jeans. You can wear modern jeans that aren't super low cut. If they aren't comfortable or you have muffin top than try a different brand. If you are curvy, you'll have to look harder to find the right fit. Here are some amazing mom jeans ;). http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_007B3891000P?prdNo=6 http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_007A0100000P?prdNo=1 http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_007A5449000P?prdNo=9 Edited October 28, 2011 by Sevilla Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Here are some amazing mom jeans ;). http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_007B3891000P?prdNo=6 http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_007A0100000P?prdNo=1 http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_007A5449000P?prdNo=9 OHMYBOB! That first one? :svengo: I didn't even know you could get jeans to fit that badly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Sorry, but I am over 50 and Mom jeans are the only thing that is comfy. I figure if folks don't like to see my mom butt, they can look elsewhere. Amanda jeans by Gloria Vanderbilt. That's it. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In2why Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I try to wear cute-butt jeans, but they often come paired with muffin tops or butt-crack shows. I have a couple cute-butt jeans right now, but they are too big after I have them on for 10 minutes and I am constantly pulling up my jeans. Don't say the word "belt" because that pretty much guarantees muffin top. The only solution to that mid section roll is a visit to Dr. 90210. Losing 20 lbs and getting to a healthy weight did nothing. I have the same problem, BUT I have to say that after reading this article I finally know that it isn't really the low waist versus a bit higher waist, but the pocket placement that makes a difference. This is the most important thing I learned all day, and I know that I will buy jeans differently from now on. I am excited to go shopping, which I never am. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommee & Baba Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 OHMYBOB! That first one? :svengo: I didn't even know you could get jeans to fit that badly. :iagree: THOSE are BAD!! :rofl: These are the type of jeans I wear. http://www.amethystjeans.com/index.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) The first pair of mom jeans worn by subject B are my favorite jeans. I wear them almost daily. They are the most comfortable jeans I've ever found and they don't give me a muffin top. Every other pair of jeans I've tried are uncomfortable, ride up my crotch, give me a horrible muffin top, and/or just plain unwearable due to discomfort. I did buy a pair of lower rise jeans once, and I had to hitch them up every couple of steps. I'll take a long butt with longer shirts over "cute" jeans that are so uncomfortable that I can't wait to get out of them. Edited October 28, 2011 by joannqn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perry Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I get all my jeans from Buckle now. Maddie style of the Big Star brand is my favorite. They are expensive, but fit great and are flattering. They're great if you are feeling frumpy and need a change. I do have a little bit of a muffin top with them, but I never wear anything tucked in, so it's not obvious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daisy Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) I like the looks of the mom jeans better in those pictures. :lol: Guess I'm never going to be a fashionista. I can't stand low-waisted jeans. I've never bought a pair of elastic waist jeans though either. Edited October 28, 2011 by Daisy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I have to say that I disagree with some of the blogger's assessments. I like the angled pockets. Perhaps that reflects coming of age in the 80's. I think some of the looks she likes, like pockets going onto the leg, are not really attractive. I have a variety of jean styles, but my dh likes my Lands End mom jeans the best. And I think his opinion is pretty important. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pretty in Pink Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Holy cow @ the first pair of Sears jeans linked by a PP! :blink: I wear GAP Perfect Boot or Long and Lean. No mom jeans for me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamakimberly Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 No mom jeans. I like jeans that hit just at my hips and adore trouser cut jeans as long as they have butt pockets. No butt pockets just doesn't work for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trish Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I wear something like this. I have them in deep blue and in black (the black has faded nicely). I wear them long with flats. Laura Don't those jeans violate ALL of her rules? (it was hard to tell on the pockets) BLACK. SINGLE COLOR. HIGH WAIST. HIGH POCKETS. (I think) Not that I'm a fashion maven, this is all new to me. I don't wear jeans if I can wear sweats. No long butt if I can be ALL butt! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caedmyn Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I have some mom jeans. I try not to wear them because they're too high waisted. I have some sort of cute butt jeans, but they dip too low in front and give me a muffin top...plus my shirts never quite seem to be long enough to prevent the dreaded "wardrobe malfunction" when I sit down. and I have a size 6 waist and size 8 hips so it's darn near impossible to get a pair of non-elastic waist pants that actually fit. And I'm cheap and have very long legs so my pants are always too short (long lengths only come in the really expensive jeans). I'm hopeless at fashion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I think...judging from the pics...I like the looks of the "Mom Jeans" better. Crawling into another thread now... :leaving: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 The rear view is very important. I dislike both the high waist mom-jeans look and the very low rise hey!-here's-my-butt-crack look. There is a happy medium that looks good on most shapes. And, yes pocket placement is important, but the most important thing is to be able to get a really good look at your rear view when you try things on (this is also important for shirts) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Shapewear helps, but I have lots of loose skin. I exercise A LOT (walk 15 - 20 miles a week, plus 4-8 hours a week of rock climbing and some pilates). That may firm up those muscles underneath, but nothing short of a scalpel will get rid of my muffin top. I can't have the waistband too high on my hips because it squeezes my flab. I can't tuck shirts in because that just screams "Look at my spare tire!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sevilla Posted October 28, 2011 Author Share Posted October 28, 2011 I have some mom jeans. I try not to wear them because they're too high waisted. I have some sort of cute butt jeans, but they dip too low in front and give me a muffin top...plus my shirts never quite seem to be long enough to prevent the dreaded "wardrobe malfunction" when I sit down. and I have a size 6 waist and size 8 hips so it's darn near impossible to get a pair of non-elastic waist pants that actually fit. And I'm cheap and have very long legs so my pants are always too short (long lengths only come in the really expensive jeans). I'm hopeless at fashion. You need to pay to have your jeans tailored - taken in at the waist and shortened in the leg. It's $20 or so and so worth it b/c then the pants actually fit you. It's better to think of pants and even shirts as being a 'basic fit' that you get customized to your body like clothing *used* to be made (and is still made in much of the rest of the world - if you go to Southeast Asia you don't get ready-to-wear clothing, you go to a fabric shop with in-house tailor who takes your measurements and creates clothes to your body alone. And bonus they cost mere dollars :001_smile: ). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brigitte Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I say this every time the topic of jeans comes up on the board....Talbots has the best selection of jeans for moms. They are classy looking (no sassy words written across your back side) and they are cut for a "mom" figure. You can find high waist jeans, if you want them, but most are what I would call a mid-rise. They last forever (I have two pair: one is 3 years old and the other 4 and still look great). Generally Talbott's jeans run $58, but you can almost always find them in the mark down sections for $24-$39. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sevilla Posted October 28, 2011 Author Share Posted October 28, 2011 Don't those jeans violate ALL of her rules? (it was hard to tell on the pockets) BLACK. SINGLE COLOR. HIGH WAIST. HIGH POCKETS. (I think) Not that I'm a fashion maven, this is all new to me. I don't wear jeans if I can wear sweats. No long butt if I can be ALL butt! Those are total mom jeans - high waisted, *fake* belt/buckle, solid color, and angled pockets. Look at how they appear on the model's front in the video - they make her inner thighs look large and misshapen in the fabric. If the model can't rock them, then that says mom jeans right there. ;) Here is the link referenced above: http://www.marksandspencer.com/Una-Roma-Denim-Bootcut-Jeans/dp/B003J5HAX8?ie=UTF8&ref=sr_1_16&nodeId=122283031&sr=1-16&qid=1319836187 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) Don't those jeans violate ALL of her rules? (it was hard to tell on the pockets) BLACK. SINGLE COLOR. HIGH WAIST. HIGH POCKETS. (I think) Not that I'm a fashion maven, this is all new to me. I don't wear jeans if I can wear sweats. No long butt if I can be ALL butt! They don't have elastic. The waist sits only just above my hip bones. The pockets start a couple of inches below the top of my crack and end where my bottom curves underneath. As I said, the black has faded nicely. Maybe they look better on me than on the ultra-skinny model! I've never liked pre-faded jeans - I'd rather wash them a few times until they take on a natural patina. I used to wear Lands' End Mum jeans, so I know what those look like. Laura Edited October 28, 2011 by Laura Corin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I will fess up to wearing my grandma pants for Holiday Dinners. Plenty of room for over indulgence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 The first pair of mom jeans worn by subject B are my favorite jeans. I wear them almost daily. They are the most comfortable jeans I've ever found and they don't give me a muffin top. Every other pair of jeans I've tried are uncomfortable, ride up my crotch, give me a horrible muffin top, and/or just plain unwearable due to discomfort. I did buy a pair of lower rise jeans once, and I had to hitch them up every couple of steps. I'll take a long butt with longer shirts over "cute" jeans that are so uncomfortable that I can't wait to get out of them. Ayup! I mean really, I'm pushing 40. I'm not 16. Why do I care if I don't have a cute butt? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizzyBee Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 (edited) Don't those jeans violate ALL of her rules? (it was hard to tell on the pockets) BLACK. SINGLE COLOR. HIGH WAIST. HIGH POCKETS. (I think) Not that I'm a fashion maven, this is all new to me. I don't wear jeans if I can wear sweats. No long butt if I can be ALL butt! OTOH, on What Not to Wear, jeans must be dark wash trousers, and pockets must be flat. I think Clinton would approve of Laura's jeans. :-) Edited October 28, 2011 by LizzyBee Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GingerPoppy Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 They don't have elastic. The waist sits only just above my hip bones. The pockets start a couple of inches below the top of my crack and end where my bottom curves underneath. As I said, the black has faded nicely. Maybe they look better on me than on the ultra-skinny model! I used to wear Lands' End Mum jeans, so I know what those look like. Laura I think they look great, and don't break the rules! They're a very nice dressy jean to wear with a blouse rather than a t-shirt. Sleek. Classy. I'd buy these as well as the more casual ones (non-mom) in the blog... and I'm in the market right now. Time for a little shopping. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizzyBee Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 Ayup! I mean really, I'm pushing 40. I'm not 16. Why do I care if I don't have a cute butt? When dh and I were dating, he'd tell me I have ugly feet but a cute butt. I'm 47 now, but if I put on a pair of jeans and he tells me they make my butt look cute, I know they're keepers. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silliness7 Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 When dh and I were dating, he'd tell me I have ugly feet but a cute butt. I'm 47 now, but if I put on a pair of jeans and he tells me they make my butt look cute, I know they're keepers. :D It really takes the pressure off when there is only ONE person in the world who needs to think your butt is cute. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acorn Posted October 28, 2011 Share Posted October 28, 2011 I think...judging from the pics...I like the looks of the "Mom Jeans" better. Crawling into another thread now... :leaving: I completely agree. I will proudly wear clothes that cover my body and aren't squeezing anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daisy Posted October 29, 2011 Share Posted October 29, 2011 I'm still trying to figure out why anyone thinks their butts look better in the low-waisted jeans. I think their hips look larger in the second pair. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Running the race Posted October 29, 2011 Share Posted October 29, 2011 Informative! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted October 29, 2011 Share Posted October 29, 2011 I think there is something wrong with me. I liked one pair of the mom jeans the best out of all the options - not *most* of them (gag) but my favorite was a mom jean. Am I the only one that notices that some of the non-mom jeans give a saggy looking butt? I don't like saggy butt either. I don't know why that's preferable to a long butt especially when those pants typically have you also dealing with the muffin top and the butt crack issue. But I've never been accused of being a fashionista. :D I will take care not to show my socks though. eww. I thought the same. Some of the non-mom jeans looked like they were pouring themselves into the pair or trying too hard (speaking as someone that just bought her first pair in 14yrs tonight) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted October 29, 2011 Share Posted October 29, 2011 OTOH, on What Not to Wear, jeans must be dark wash trousers, and pockets must be flat. I think Clinton would approve of Laura's jeans. :-) I trust Clinton Kelly!! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UnsinkableKristen Posted October 29, 2011 Share Posted October 29, 2011 I wear GAP Perfect Boot or Long and Lean. No mom jeans for me! :iagree: Gap Long & Lean jeans have been my favorites for years and years now. I only wish they didn't stretch out quite so easily! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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