Munschhausen by Internet? News to me.

[Audrey]

This is an older article, but it's new to me. http://www.cafemom.com/journals/read/532844/A_Guide_to_Not_Being_Gullible_AKA_Beware_the_Munchausen_By_Internet

 

I remember the JGEMom fiasco on the old boards. I fell for it and hard, but after it was over, I thought for sure that was an isolated incident. I had heard of Munschhausen's syndrome, but I hadn't heard of this variation, even though I guess I encountered it with that incident.

 

Is this a common thing? I'm on very few other forums. Most are quite small and for very specific interests, so from my perspective it doesn't seem rampant. I suppose we do occasionally get trolls here, but that's not the same thing at all.

 

If you are on online forums a lot, do you see this often? Have you been burned in the past? I struggle with my online cynicism sometimes. I want to care, but I remember the emotional toll that incident took on me. I think I became cyber-jaded from it. IRL, it is my philosophy to trust people and believe in them, until they give me reason not to. I wonder if other people feel that way, too.

 

How does someone get past that emotional manipulation? Or, should we always be cautious with our emotional investments online?

[Paintedlady]

I've seen this several times in different forums over the years. I don't know that it's rampant, but I've seen my fair share. There are a few here that I wonder about sometimes; always drama, always the victim. Makes me go hmmmm.

[Xuzi]

About 4 years ago, on a nother message board I'm on, we had a case of Munschausen's pop up. Not only was it "by internet", it was also "by proxy". The poster had a toddler son who was constantly "sick", and she used his "illness" to solicite donations and such from other posters. When people started questioning the way she took care of her son in between hospital stays, a few started investigating, and called the hospital where he was staying. The hospital caught her on camera putting blood in his diaper.

 

The kids were sent to live with an aunt, and she (the aunt) posted a picture of the boy about 6 months later, and a healthier looking little boy you never saw. :(

[mommymilkies]

The board will remain nameless, but yes, I've seen this before. I try to avoid threads with major drama, but I do give sympathy to ones I feel are legit.

 

I do disagree with this, though:

 

"4. Public posting. Why post publicly to hundreds (if not thousands) of total strangers instead of sending any necessary private mails and notes to a select few friends. The people who know you. The ones who will give support. "

 

Not everyone has a support system. And some of us have friends online and feel connected to a community that might give us loving prayers and good thoughts without judgement. For example, we had a CPS case a couple of years ago that was proven to be bogus before they opened the door, but as soon as it was over, I went online and asked for help from friends because a. my family does not have CPS experience b. I have no friends IRL, really, and c. I was distraught and didn't need my MIL telling me it's because we should put my 1 yo in a crib/feed them Doritos/whatever else absurd answer she would find for why we were in the wrong. :lol:

[Mergath]

Heh. Seen that quite a bit around the internet over the last few years.

 

"Omg! My *insert immediate family member here* is about to die and is being loaded into an ambulance and I just had to rush over to the computer and tell this message board all about it!"

 

Uh-huh. Riiiiight.

 

I feel sad for the people who get emotionally invested in stuff like this and find out later they were duped.

[*Lulu*]

There were a few of these sort of things on a board where I used to be a member.

 

One turned out to be a poster with too much bull and too little life.

 

The other turned out to be legitimate. She was legitimately hard headed, unbalanced and in need of a dose of reality, but she was legitimate.

 

Personally I am not one who trusts easily. Even IRL I do not always take people at face value. I try to give folks online the benefit of the doubt, but if I detect a strong aroma of manure from a post/thread I just back away. (And make a mental note!)

[Mergath]

I do disagree with this, though:

 

"4. Public posting. Why post publicly to hundreds (if not thousands) of total strangers instead of sending any necessary private mails and notes to a select few friends. The people who know you. The ones who will give support. "

 

 

 

Yeah, I don't think anyone would make accusations on the basis of that alone. Message boards can be a great source of support. However, if you claim to be looking for that support while Grandma (or whoever) is literally in the middle of a heart attack or something... then you have serious issues.

[kitten18]

I've seen it a few times on another forum that I used to be on. I was always completely oblivious. I was not too caught up in the drama (the outpouring of sympathy) but I never had a clue what was going on until it was all over and the people were exposed.

 

Some people seem to have a really good nose for this kind of bs.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Other than a few trolls, I think we've been relatively unscathed since the JGEMom incident.

 

Many of the people on this board have been here a long time and have built up friendships and a sense of community here. Posting their difficulties and asking for prayer is part of our community culture.

[Audrey]

The board will remain nameless, but yes, I've seen this before. I try to avoid threads with major drama, but I do give sympathy to ones I feel are legit.

 

I do disagree with this, though:

 

"4. Public posting. Why post publicly to hundreds (if not thousands) of total strangers instead of sending any necessary private mails and notes to a select few friends. The people who know you. The ones who will give support. "

 

Not everyone has a support system. And some of us have friends online and feel connected to a community that might give us loving prayers and good thoughts without judgement. For example, we had a CPS case a couple of years ago that was proven to be bogus before they opened the door, but as soon as it was over, I went online and asked for help from friends because a. my family does not have CPS experience b. I have no friends IRL, really, and c. I was distraught and didn't need my MIL telling me it's because we should put my 1 yo in a crib/feed them Doritos/whatever else absurd answer she would find for why we were in the wrong. :lol:

 

 

Yes. I agree with you on that one. I mean... I come HERE because I don't know any other homeschoolers IRL. I have met some randomly while elsewhere, but as far as I know, there are no other hs'ers in my area. So, this is my de facto hs support system. I can understand how people are sometimes isolated in lives or parts of their lives. I think the internet is great for connecting people like that, but there's a big difference between seeking support and making up fiction to get "support."

[Audrey]

Other than a few trolls, I think we've been relatively unscathed since the JGEMom incident.

 

Many of the people on this board have been here a long time and have built up friendships and a sense of community here. Posting their difficulties and asking for prayer is part of our community culture.

 

 

I agree with you there, Jean, but what about when people are making it up? I felt like an enormous fool after JGEMom was exposed. I stayed away from the old boards for months after that. I felt completely embarrassed to have been so gullible. I kind of got over that when I realized I wasn't the only one -- that many of us took her bait.

 

So now I tend to put up my guard quite quickly. To be honest, that doesn't feel very good either, but I don't think I could stand getting burned again.

[OnTheBrink]

I used to belong to a pregnancy/parenting site (now long gone) and there seemed to be issues like this a LOT. I only post at two other boards besides this one and there haven't been problems with that at those places.

[Murphy101]

Just twice (over the more than a dozen years ive been online) and not on that scale.

 

And it didn't make a difference in my reaction.

 

I have no money to give, so that's never been an issue.

 

But if the worst thing I've had taken wrongly from me is misplaced sympathy and worry - well I've suffered worse losses.

 

I think those people are either sad or crook scammers. Scammers can go to prison. The just sad ones? Well maybe my sympathy and worry wasn't entirely misplaced after all.

 

But yeah. It is sad that people like that cause some to not want to be as kind in general.

[Kirch]

I witnessed a couple of incidents on a different board where I used to be active. One of them was a DOOZY. It's made me really cautious. I think most people who've been around on forums for a while know not to take newbie dramatic posts at face value (at least not immediately), but this one involved a long-time poster and ended up being very elaborate. You just never know.

 

I haven't come across anything since I've been here that got my alarm bells ringing, which has been nice.

Edited May 6, 2011 by Kirch

[Plucky]

I wouldn't know unless it became very, very obvious. I do think some people are more emotional or dramatic in their postings here.

Edited May 6, 2011 by True Blue

[Jean in Newcastle]

I agree with you there, Jean, but what about when people are making it up? I felt like an enormous fool after JGEMom was exposed. I stayed away from the old boards for months after that. I felt completely embarrassed to have been so gullible. I kind of got over that when I realized I wasn't the only one -- that many of us took her bait.

 

So now I tend to put up my guard quite quickly. To be honest, that doesn't feel very good either, but I don't think I could stand getting burned again.

 

I think that's why so many of us (me included) can come down rather hard on a new poster who seems overly dramatic. I would never give money to someone that I only know on the internet. And while I might genuinely offer condolences to a newcomer, I'm not going to be as emotionally invested in their circumstances as someone I "know".

 

There are people who I know irl and online who have "martyr personalities". They don't have munchausen, I don't think, but they are a bit narcissistic and thrive on a bit of drama even as they publicly deplore it. But these people are also funny, and kind and have other redeemable qualities - at least the ones I consider friends do.

[keptwoman]

I witnessed a couple of incidents on a different board where I used to be active. One of them was a DOOZY. It's made me really cautious. I think most people who've been around on forums for a while know not to take newbie dramatic posts at face value (at least not immediately), but this one involved a long-time poster and ended up being very elaborate. You just never know.

 

I haven't come across anything since I've been here that got my alarm bells ringing, which has been nice.

Yes, we had one on a private board (20 members, no public access) where we had been together for a few years before the stories started, and 5+ before we found out about the deception. It was very elaborate and multi faceted. We never sent money, but we did send a prayer blanket that we had all embroidered parts for. It's incredibly hurtful, and we were all very shell shocked about it. I think really, it did a lot of damage to that group, we all felt we knew and could trust each other and to find out that we had been victims of MBPI was horrible :(

 

I've seen it on other, larger boards, but it's more the dramatic newbies and they mostly tend to stand out.

[ondreeuh]

Yes, it happened on a parenting forum I was on years ago - like 12 years ago. I'm still upset about it!

 

The teenage poster basically fabricated a whole novel. It had more than the average amount of drama, but it was spread out, and she was consistent. No red flags. She was only exposed because her parents found out and required her to publicly apologize before they disconnected her internet.

 

I am SO leery now. My BS meter goes off pretty regularly, when people either have way too much "bad luck" or post about their many, many problems but don't want any advice, just sympathy. Yes, on this forum as well. I just keep my mouth shut and figure time will tell.

[aggieamy]

I've seen this several times in different forums over the years. I don't know that it's rampant, but I've seen my fair share. There are a few here that I wonder about sometimes; always drama, always the victim. Makes me go hmmmm.

 

Yep. Always the victim. There's some that I posts I can't read because of that.

 

Heh. Seen that quite a bit around the internet over the last few years.

 

"Omg! My *insert immediate family member here* is about to die and is being loaded into an ambulance and I just had to rush over to the computer and tell this message board all about it!"

 

Uh-huh. Riiiiight.

 

I feel sad for the people who get emotionally invested in stuff like this and find out later they were duped.

 

Yep. Agree with this one too.

 

I'm probably going to get banned for this but there's been a few times where I've been very suspicious of something. The wording in the post that was supposed to be by someone else was off. I thought it was really obvious but nobody else seemed to think anything was off about it because nobody else mentioned it.

Edited May 6, 2011 by aggieamy

[Elizabeth in WA]

I can;t even tell if my brother is as crazy (sick) as he seems (he is bipolar and has has psychotic breaks in the past) let alone strangers on the internet. And yet, I am keeping vigil for him tonight and worrying over my mom, with whom he lives. And so, I have sympathy too for strangers on the internet. If their stories are false, then they are still sick, if only in a different way than they have claimed.

[Audrey]

I can;t even tell if my brother is as crazy (sick) as he seems (he is bipolar and has has psychotic breaks in the past) let alone strangers on the internet. And yet, I am keeping vigil for him tonight and worrying over my mom, with whom he lives. And so, I have sympathy too for strangers on the internet. If their stories are false, then they are still sick, if only in a different way than they have claimed.

 

 

Very true. Those are wise words.

 

So, I may still have sympathy, even if not necessarily for the reasons presented for sympathy.

[twoxcell]

Unfortunately I have seen this multiple times on a forum I used to frequent more often. Some of the stories were quite convincing, and I even shed a few tears over fictional children:confused:. Very sick, and sad.

[SonshineLearner]

......I felt like an enormous fool after JGEMom was exposed. I stayed away from the old boards for months after that. ....

 

Bummer, I didn't ever hear about that story :confused::glare::bigear:

 

Mostly though, as long as I'm sending only sympathies and not cash... I'm fine with it. If I was sending cash, I'd do it through a community group or Church so they could check out the story... (And, I'd look up the church/group info... so I know it's a church/community group)

[RanchGirl]

Yep. Always the victim. There's some that I posts I can't read because of that.

 

 

I'm probably going to get banned for this but there's been a few times where I've been very suspicious of something. The wording in the post that was supposed to be by someone else was off. I thought it was really obvious but nobody else seemed to think anything was off about it because nobody else mentioned it.

 

:iagree: with both points. And you're not the only one who notices stuff like that.

[Pax]

I have sympathy too for strangers on the internet. If their stories are false, then they are still sick, if only in a different way than they have claimed.

 

This is where I stand. I would not send money to anyone that I did not know IRL. I've sent a lot of prayers, good thoughts and once or twice, clothes.

 

However, I also have had a life that I choose not to tell anyone about online as it sounds like a really bad soap opera, and its ongoing. Once I become close friends IRL, I slowly let things slip. I think that colors my view that sometimes, things happen in life that you have little to no control over. And they happen in weird ways.

[KathleenL]

About 4 years ago, on a nother message board I'm on, we had a case of Munschausen's pop up. Not only was it "by internet", it was also "by proxy". The poster had a toddler son who was constantly "sick", and she used his "illness" to solicite donations and such from other posters. When people started questioning the way she took care of her son in between hospital stays, a few started investigating, and called the hospital where he was staying. The hospital caught her on camera putting blood in his diaper.

 

The kids were sent to live with an aunt, and she (the aunt) posted a picture of the boy about 6 months later, and a healthier looking little boy you never saw. :(

 

:ohmy: I remember this! I was on that board back then too! I have thought about that little boy over the years and wondered how he was doing. It was such a bizarre situation. I'm glad to hear that he was looking so much better after a few months.

 

Aside from that incident, I can think of two others on other message boards that were similar - people claiming medical problems and/or dire financial straits that turned out to be completely fictional. In all of these cases, I have to say I had some suspicions. I think I'm kind of cynical about drama by nature :tongue_smilie:- and definitely so when it comes to online drama!

[Peela]

I dont think prayers and kindness is every wasted, and we have all learned and become more discriminating. We are a new generation really and just becoming savvy about internet communities. I was around for the JGEM fiasco but never got caught up particularly. I remember telling my IRL friends about the unfolding drama though so I definitely believed it at the time- it never occurred to me not to.

I remember people here learned a way to check if people were genuine- I cant remember it and never understood it but after that for a while, people were being checked on and accused regularly. Part of the whole healing and discriminating process.

While I can be stung by online comments and also feel compassion for people, so far I haven't become as emotionally involved as some people are, with their online friends and communities. Its good to keep things in perspective and recognise the benefits and limitations of online relating- this is a message board, we dont really know each other, we could be anyone, we might not spend time together in real life even if we lived next door to each other, but we can still have an enlivened and active, healthy community online and bounce off each other, learn from each other. I enjoy to learn how others see the world even if I don't agree with it- it is mind expanding. Its good not to take anything personally, though, and to take responsibility for ourselves, 100%.

[asta]

I've seen this several times in different forums over the years. I don't know that it's rampant, but I've seen my fair share. There are a few here that I wonder about sometimes; always drama, always the victim. Makes me go hmmmm.

 

Yep.

 

I can actually read comments from boards out loud and DH or DS can name the poster! (ok, that is truly sad...)

 

Some people seem to have a really good nose for this kind of bs.

 

:: raises hand ::

 

If you have a knack for discerning patterns... it's actually very easy.

 

(full disclosure: I'm the BS nose for the site where I work, which has nothing to do with either parenting or homeschooling)

 

 

a

[FaithManor]

I wasn't around for the JGEMOM thing. I think that we were in the middle of our renovation project here and I was pretty much off line. So, I am not certain how that played out. I have not, to my knowledge, ever known a Munchausen's sufferer in person.

 

I must be naive though, because I've never really thought about the internet being a place where Munchausen's sufferers would gather. I guess I always assumed they needed physical contact, physical attention, medical people and environments, etc. UGH!

 

Faith

[Word Nerd]

I've seen it a couple of times. One woman was very convincing, and she was a good storyteller. I fell for her tale of woe about her twins. The only reason it fell apart is that a couple of posters who knew each other IRL and lived near the con artist's city (that detail was true) tried to offer her support in person and meet for coffee and discovered that one of the facts she had given previously was false. Once one lie was out, the rest came to light. I don't think the woman even had kids.

[Chris in VA]

I'm one of those posters with constant family drama. I have posted pretty frequently. (Duh.) I haven't even told every.single.thing. that has happened. I did at first, but I'm learning not to. I hope you all know I'm real, and I'm trying not to have my life defined by those around me, and that I do so appreciate the prayer support and good vibes. I actually turned down MariannNova's dinner at one point, because I just didn't have the energy even to receive real life support! How weird is that?

 

I was here also for the JGEM thing, but I honestly don't remember it all.

 

I think it's interesting how fragile a thing trust is...built up slowly, shattered in an instant, even slower or sometimes impossible to build again.

 

I hope you know I never take your trust for granted.

[Word Nerd]

There are people who I know irl and online who have "martyr personalities". They don't have munchausen, I don't think, but they are a bit narcissistic and thrive on a bit of drama even as they publicly deplore it.

 

Sounds like several of the teens I know on Facebook.

[Wheres Toto]

I saw this a lot on pregnancy/birth month boards I used to belong to. It seemed about 1/2 the boards (and there were a lot - every due date month and every birth month for 2-3 years or more) would have an incident - a very premature birth, a miscarriage, SIDS, child with cancer - that then ended up being a crock. These played on the biggest fears these women had to elicit sympathy, money, whatever. I felt so bad for anyone it truly happened to because some groups became very cynical about it.

 

I do tend to keep a distance on-line. I tend to post where I can keep it just the facts, or an opinion on a fairly non-controversial topic. (I do sometimes stray from that when I'm in a mood.:glare:) I definitely avoid getting emotionally invested in an online community although I'm enough of an introvert that I don't tend to get emotionally invested IRL either. I have a few close relationship and the rest tend to be very superficial.

[Lady Florida.]

I'm on a parenting list that was a pregnancy list way back when I was pregnant with ds 13. We had one woman who always had close calls and I can't count how many times she "almost" lost her baby. She never scammed us for any money, but she did garner sympathy until someone started questioning it all. What was sad was that a few women on the list really did miscarry and I can't imagine why someone would fake such a thing.

 

I've wondered about a few people here. Anytime you have a large online community that kind of thing can happen.

[Denisemomof4]

I'm one of those posters with constant family drama. I have posted pretty frequently. (Duh.) I haven't even told every.single.thing. that has happened. I did at first, but I'm learning not to. I hope you all know I'm real, and I'm trying not to have my life defined by those around me, and that I do so appreciate the prayer support and good vibes. I actually turned down MariannNova's dinner at one point, because I just didn't have the energy even to receive real life support! How weird is that?

 

I was here also for the JGEM thing, but I honestly don't remember it all.

 

I think it's interesting how fragile a thing trust is...built up slowly, shattered in an instant, even slower or sometimes impossible to build again.

 

I hope you know I never take your trust for granted.

 

:grouphug: this is what makes me sad about this thread. While I do think it's awful to be a person like the one pointed out in the OP's article, I do think there are many honest, genuine people on this board (but really, how do I know?!) and I think it's sad that some are pointing out people who are too dramatic here, need their meds adjusted, etc. That's rude. If there are some who ALWAYS have dramatic, victim type posts, I guess I don't see it that way.

 

I am thankful that when I was crying out during my mom's death, it was nurses HERE that helped me, NOT Hospice, NOT nurses where my mom was being seen. They were CLUELESS. It was the nurses HERE who helped me adjust my mom's meds, which allowed her to die a more comfortable and peaceful death.

 

It's is here I've turned with some health concerns/injuries with my kids, and the wealth of information has been invaluable.

 

I, too, have had many things happen over a period of time. I have cried out here, too. I have far more posts/threads which are NOT like that than ones which are. So if anyone thinks that I've been one of those "victims" who needs meds, or an adjustment, then shame on them, NOT on me.

 

Maybe some just have such simple, easy lives that they don't understand serious trials that some of us have been plagued with.

 

People, don't let this discourage you from coming here to vent, for support, or for prayer!!!! That is one thing I *LOVE* about this place!

 

Regarding the OP, I have seen this once but this is really the only board I post on. I used to also belong to a horse forum and the person who was crying wolf, saying he was trampled by his horse during a horse show and had several severe breaks through out his body, ended up being a long time poster who lied in waiting to prey upon the rest of us........ whether for money or sympathy. He was exposed and the moderator banned him forever, and I left the community after that. It shook me.

[Purple Sage]

I have been suckered in a couple times, but now I am very careful and reserved. To the point of not even posting, just reading most of the time. I always feel like other people know more about things than I do so it is better to just stay quiet!

 

But that article is very interesting.

[Impish]

I guess I'm another one whose life is dramatic. Btwn RSD, WCB, and life...well, I've often prayed for boring!

 

Being online is my support system. I can't handle being in public much, some days, not at all. Other than SpecialMama, I don't have anyone that I get together with, irl. I head here.

 

Here's where there are other parents who understand the challenges not only of day to day life, parenting, but hsing as well...a rarity.

 

Here, I've found ppl who have no hesitation in offering love, support, prayer...and frankly, when dealing with a severe chronic pain disability, thats the best you can possibly hope for. Drs are great at dispensing meds, but meds can't take the pain away.

 

Yesterday, I was in a dark place. I posted. I had ppl offering ideas, suggestions, prayer and support. Understanding. And I'm grateful that I can come here for that. I don't know where or how I'd be if I didn't.

 

There's always going to be someone that thinks, "Too much". Too much info, too much drama, too much...something. I can't control that. All I can do is be who I am.

 

*shrug*

[Parrothead]

:grouphug: this is what makes me sad about this thread. While I do think it's awful to be a person like the one pointed out in the OP's article, I do think there are many honest, genuine people on this board (but really, how do I know?!) and I think it's sad that some are pointing out people who are too dramatic here, need their meds adjusted, etc. That's rude. If there are some who ALWAYS have dramatic, victim type posts, I guess I don't see it that way.

 

:grouphug: I'm with you here, my friend. :iagree:

 

I knew a person IRL who suffered from Munchhausen Syndrome. That was two moves ago, and let me tell you there was a deep sigh of relief when we left that state.

 

For some of us this board is the only place to have adult interaction. I spent my first 18 months here posting to people about just any thing because I was in a crappy little cliquish town that deeply disliked "outsiders."

 

Unfortunately it is human nature to vent, whine and want to talk to others when things are going badly. I think if we were to keep everything sweetness and light on the General Board, it would be a very boring place.

[Stacie]

... I felt so bad for anyone it truly happened to because some groups became very cynical about it...

 

 

 

This is what is so hard for me. My very dear friend Janet and I were around during the jgemom days, though I didn't post much at all. Shortly after that incident, Janet had some horrible things happen to her (lost her home in New Orleans to Katrina, sued by the person buying the home, scammed by her hubby's employee..the list goes on). She was very open about a few of her problems but a few people here made hurtful comments questioning her authenticity (I was living it with her, I knew she was real). She stopped posting but unfortunately was diagnosed with cancer. I told her to post and ask for prayers but she didn't want the hurtful comments, and because of the "friend-posting" of jgemom she wouldn't let me solicit prayers on her behalf. We lost her less than a year after diagnosis, and the board lost a very kind generous poster who was afraid to open herself up again.

 

It can be hard to know given the anonomyous nature of the internet. This taught me that it's sometimes better to err on the side of kindness than to risk hurting a legitimate person going through a rough season of life.

[Lolly]

JGEMom had me hook line and sinker. Now, I am (I think) getting pretty good at spotting them. I have a strong feeling there are a few on this board still. They aren't necessarily the people who have chronic health problems and post about them. Their posts just grab me as off somehow. Once you see the "offness", it is hard to believe they are being truthful.

[snickelfritz]

The first board community that I belonged to was a miscarriage support group. This type of thing happened over and over and over......

 

Now, I'm cynical. If a situation starts to sound questionable, I don't investigate. I don't check ISP addresses. I just ignore the post and the poster. Over time, if the person otherwise seems legitimate, I'll go back to reading their posts.

 

I thought the red flags in the article were really good.

[Lady Florida.]

There are people who I know irl and online who have "martyr personalities". They don't have munchausen, I don't think, but they are a bit narcissistic and thrive on a bit of drama even as they publicly deplore it. But these people are also funny, and kind and have other redeemable qualities - at least the ones I consider friends do.

 

I have a real life friend like that. She has so many wonderful qualities and I love her dearly, but I'm such a no drama type that it can be hard to be around her when she's in a drama phase.

[Impish]

I just read the article...I guess I shouldn't have said that I appreciate the prayers, etc here :lol:

[Denisemomof4]

 

For some of us this board is the only place to have adult interaction. I spent my first 18 months here posting to people about just any thing because I was in a crappy little cliquish town that deeply disliked "outsiders."

 

 

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

Hi, Friend! I'm sure you know by now that ME is known for this, right? They only want outsiders there for vacations when they can steal your money . After that they want you GONE. I have good friends who started up a business in ME and can't wait to have it at a place where they can run it from Portsmouth, NH, and only go back to ME to check up on it. They feel they have never been accepted there, haven't made friends, and can't wait to leave. They are from NH!!!

 

Imagine how I was looked upon when I moved out from CA 26 years ago. I moved out with my beautiful neon wardrobe and lace stockings (Madonna era) and I moved to the land of beige. :lol::lol::lol: I was most definitely categorized as a freak. :D I found that CA fashion was about a decade ahead of New England, and New England will always be more conservative anyway. I've adapted. ;)

[Denisemomof4]

I have NO IDEA what anyone is talking about with regards to JGEMom.

[unsinkable]

Are we not supposed to talk about what J G E mom did?

 

:confused:

 

I am pretty sure she is the one who said her 15 yo DD had $3x at youth group in the bathroom (?) and got pregnant. it was a lie.

 

Tell me to delete this if we're not supposed to talk about it. Or if I got my stories messed up...

Edited May 6, 2011 by unsinkable

[Sebastian (a lady)]

I agree with you there, Jean, but what about when people are making it up? I felt like an enormous fool after JGEMom was exposed. I stayed away from the old boards for months after that. I felt completely embarrassed to have been so gullible. I kind of got over that when I realized I wasn't the only one -- that many of us took her bait.

 

So now I tend to put up my guard quite quickly. To be honest, that doesn't feel very good either, but I don't think I could stand getting burned again.

 

I think there are people who get something out of emotional drama. My word for them is emotional vampires (in the sense that they like to feast on the emotional crises of others). I think that whole sections of the media feel this, with its steady flow of news and special reports on this or that crisis, emergency and hidden threat.

 

I think there are people who thrive on putting out their family drama in such a way that folks will line up to tell them how they are right and all of their family members are wrong. I sometimes wonder if the person posting is the toxic relative or friend without boundaries that all of their friends complain about.

 

Most of the people here seem pretty genuine. A few rub me the wrong way. A few REALLY rub me the wrong way and my ignore list gets to handle them.

 

But for the most case, all that anyone is going to get is my kind thoughts, ferverent prayers and in special cases, bow tie lasagne or hot dog caserole. So I guess I don't worry about it too much.

[FaithManor]

I have NO IDEA what anyone is talking about with regards to JGEMom.

 

I don't either. Was this a case of just a lier that liked to rile people up...a troll...or a true case of munchausen's and how would anyone know for sure?

 

See, that's the rub. Some people really do just get hammered, over and over, with illnesses, injuries, storms of life, etc. I'd hate to begin suspecting everyone who is going through a bad spot, of mental illness or criminal behavior towards their children. But, I understand that there are people like this out there. I know I've been accused by a couple of posters on this board of "embellishing" or out and out lieing about dd's accomplishments as a paramedic. Yet, they are very, very true and because she works in an area that services level 1 trauma units, she sees patients with rare problems and ER's that are brimming with critical patients. Yet, I suppose, since I can't prove to the naysayers these incidents because I can't disclose location and identifying information due to Hipa, then I guess this proud mamma should just keep her mouth shut to the board.

 

Faith

[unsinkable]

I've seen this several times in different forums over the years. I don't know that it's rampant, but I've seen my fair share. There are a few here that I wonder about sometimes; always drama, always the victim. Makes me go hmmmm.

 

Did someone ask for a little C+C Music Factory????

 

 

[mommymilkies]

Parrothead- Me, too. I try not to post about my life dramaz, but it's hard in towns like these. Adult interaction that is like-minded is so hard to come by. It's nice just to have someone to talk to, even if they're online sometimes. But that is a lot different than making stuff up.

 

 

I saw this a lot on pregnancy/birth month boards I used to belong to. It seemed about 1/2 the boards (and there were a lot - every due date month and every birth month for 2-3 years or more) would have an incident - a very premature birth, a miscarriage, SIDS, child with cancer - that then ended up being a crock. These played on the biggest fears these women had to elicit sympathy, money, whatever. I felt so bad for anyone it truly happened to because some groups became very cynical about it.

 

Yes! In my DDC there was one of these. Very dramatic! Some people got very emotionally into it, but to me it was very phoney. She just kinda disappeared when people started questioning her, though, about some inconsistencies. Imagine that.