Are Homeschool Children Odd?

[kbpaulie]

No offense, but I've always thought homeschooled children are a little bit odd and quirky (mine included - I think this may have happened whether or not we homeschooled - the apple doesn't fall far from the tree:001_smile:). Here's some excellent proof!

 

http://www.homeschoolnewslink.com/blog/?p=629

 

Enjoy-

KB

[akmommy]

I think that because they have not had as much pressure placed on them to conform that the little quirks they have don't get squashed in the early school years. Let's face it most of us are a bit quirky, we just learn to hide it in public.

[MyBlueLobsters]

I think that because they have not had as much pressure placed on them to conform that the little quirks they have don't get squashed in the early school years. Let's face it most of us are a bit quirky, we just learn to hide it in public.

 

:iagree: My kids are odd, and I LOVE it! :001_smile:

[Miss Peregrine]

:iagree: My kids are odd, and I LOVE it! :001_smile:

 

And they were odd before we started homeschooling.

[sandellie4]

Definitely, and I'm darn proud of it! Quirkiness wouldn't go over so well at the PTA, at least not the one in my town. :D

 

Sandy

[redsquirrel]

Well, my children are not odd.

 

But they are not average, if that is what you are asking.

[EthiopianFood]

I think that because they have not had as much pressure placed on them to conform that the little quirks they have don't get squashed in the early school years. Let's face it most of us are a bit quirky, we just learn to hide it in public.

 

:iagree:

 

Although to be fair, I do think being able to read social cues is important, and some homeschoolers have a harder time with that. Maybe it's a personality trait that makes some able to pick this up more quickly than others?

[GardenGirl639]

Excellent article! I'm odd and I'm proud!! :D

[Karen in CO]

I took a poll around my house. Yes, homeschool kids are odd, and so are their parents.

Edited April 9, 2011 by Karen in CO

[Maverick_Mom]

It's not that my kids are odd because we homeschool. It's more that we homeschool because they're odd. :D

 

Seriously, I liked the quirks and idiosyncracies and little differences in my kids when they were little. I knew that an institutional school would crush their spirits and work to make them conform to the "norm." And that bugged me. My kids weren't sociopaths -- they were just themselves, in ways that I thought made them individuals. And I not only wanted them to be themselves, I wanted them to not be ashamed of being themselves.

 

So while we had a variety of reasons for homeschooling, the preservation of my kids' individuality, their spirits, and yes, their "oddities" was a part of it. ;)

[kalanamak]

Odd people have odd children. My child is odd. I suffered greatly for this as a kid, but luckily, I work where, if you do your work, people practically kiss your feet. I was pulled to the prison unit today and saw many people I haven't seen in years. There was so much clucking and hugs, I know, odd and all, I fit in. :)

 

Odd can be hard, but what can you do? Lead a double life? Since odd kids are mistreated, it yet one more reason we homeschool.

[tex-mex]

I think that because they have not had as much pressure placed on them to conform that the little quirks they have don't get squashed in the early school years. Let's face it most of us are a bit quirky, we just learn to hide it in public.

Oh yeah... everyone has warts! That's what makes shows like World's Dumbest, J@ck_$$, Jersey Shore, Real Housewives, Dr. Phil or Maury get rich, que no? ;)

 

Sadly, everyone thinks homeschooling is like

.

 

One thing I love about homeschooling is the diversity and all of us being a square peg not being forced in a "round" hole. I loved the blog. We have quirks in our family and are happy with them! :)

[Sebastian (a lady)]

Well, my odd children are homeschooled.

 

Actually, I think that most people are pretty odd. Eventually the majority learn how to get along with others. Some never do. But I don't think that homeschooling makes you odd anymore than public schooling makes someone an introvert or a social butterfly or a bully. Either learning setting has the potential to enhance someone's strengths or their weaknesses.

[JustGin]

Excellent article - thanks for sharing. Yes, we are odd and proud of it :)

[lionfamily1999]

 

You can insist all you want that your children are well-socialized, but the truth is they haven’t been assimilated

This is perfect.

[Alicia64]

Let's face it most of us are a bit quirky, we just learn to hide it in public.

 

Gosh I'm glad to hear this! I thought it was just me!

 

Alley

[AnthemLights]

I love that article. That is one of the reasons that we home school - I don't want my kiddos growing up to be just like the "average" teen/young adults that the public schools turn out. I want them to stand out as different, unique, godly young people. (Not that homeschooling is a guarantee of that being true, but I hope you know what I mean.)

 

I, of course, do worry that as adults they might one day join a homeschooling forum like the WTM, join in on the conversations going on and horribly embarrass themselves because they don't know what teA is. :D

[Alicia64]

Seriously, though, I'd say my two boys are pretty "cool." When we integrate into a group of school kids I never worry that they're going to be seen as goofy or different.

 

I was irritated because a homeschool mag recently put a pic on the front cover of a homeschool girl looking funny and dh said, "now, this is why everyone things homeschool people are strange."

 

Sure, you can say "whatever." But, perceptions can effect our laws and long term ability to homeschool.

 

Alley

[lauracolumbus]

Oddly enough my older two are very mainstream and can fit in anywhere. They both briefly went to school (ds through third, dd through 1st). My youngest has never been to school and she is a bit different. In fact the neighbor girl just called her weird tonight. She's not weird. Just a little different. But, I seriously believe that's just her personality type. She would have been like this if she had gone to school until lots of 'normal' girls beat her down with their meanness. It's a shame that being "normal" and mean is a lot more acceptable to other little girls. I'm a lot more shocked by the meanness I see in little girls today than I did just a few years ago. Including in the homeschool community.

 

Laura

[Alicia64]

I'm a lot more shocked by the meanness I see in little girls today than I did just a few years ago. Including in the homeschool community.

 

Sad and creepy.

 

Alley

[pbt1294]

I haven't read the thread, so I'm sorry if I'm repeating someone. My dh and I were just talking about this the other day.

 

I think that kids in general (and by in general I mean I know there are exceptions) tend to be like there parents.

 

If their parents are quirky they tend to be a bit quirky.

 

I know plenty of quirky ps kids! :001_smile:

[DianeW88]

I think my kids are very mainstream. My dd participated in the drill team at our local high school. The main comment she got, "We keep forgetting that you're homeschooled because you're so normal!! Most homeschooled kids are so weird!!"

 

I knew plenty of weird public school kids, too, so I take this to mean that she doesn't wear denim jumpers and she's up to date on, and participates actively in pop culture. She has a cell phone. She texts like a mad woman. She dates. She listens to popular music on her Ipod. She just sees no need to waste her time in "the system". She's also an apprentice at our state's ballet company, so she has bigger fish to fry, so to speak. School simply got in the way of her dance.

 

But I never set out to homeschool my kids as a means for escaping "the world", but to ensure they got an excellent education and were able to pursue their interests and talents to the best of their abilities.

[LunaLee]

It's not that my kids are odd because we homeschool. It's more that we homeschool because they're odd. :D

 

Seriously, I liked the quirks and idiosyncracies and little differences in my kids when they were little. I knew that an institutional school would crush their spirits and work to make them conform to the "norm." And that bugged me. My kids weren't sociopaths -- they were just themselves, in ways that I thought made them individuals. And I not only wanted them to be themselves, I wanted them to not be ashamed of being themselves.

 

So while we had a variety of reasons for homeschooling, the preservation of my kids' individuality, their spirits, and yes, their "oddities" was a part of it. ;)

 

:iagree: This.

[Eleni]

Oddly enough my older two are very mainstream and can fit in anywhere. They both briefly went to school (ds through third, dd through 1st). My youngest has never been to school and she is a bit different. In fact the neighbor girl just called her weird tonight. She's not weird. Just a little different. But, I seriously believe that's just her personality type. She would have been like this if she had gone to school until lots of 'normal' girls beat her down with their meanness. It's a shame that being "normal" and mean is a lot more acceptable to other little girls. I'm a lot more shocked by the meanness I see in little girls today than I did just a few years ago. Including in the homeschool community.

 

Laura

 

We tried out school this year, and I am shocked over how mean girls are already in 1st grade. The other day dd got a note saying "I hate you", and she told me during read aloud time a couple girls were giggling and whispering to each other every time dd struggled with a long word. There is a lot more too.

 

My kids will not be returning to PS after this year. I see their self confidence slowly eroding, and their relationships with each other have become full of irritation and Im not ok with it.

[elegantlion]

It's not that my kids are odd because we homeschool. It's more that we homeschool because they're odd. :D

 

Seriously, I liked the quirks and idiosyncracies and little differences in my kids when they were little. I knew that an institutional school would crush their spirits and work to make them conform to the "norm." And that bugged me. My kids weren't sociopaths -- they were just themselves, in ways that I thought made them individuals. And I not only wanted them to be themselves, I wanted them to not be ashamed of being themselves.

 

So while we had a variety of reasons for homeschooling, the preservation of my kids' individuality, their spirits, and yes, their "oddities" was a part of it. ;)

 

Yes, my son is odd, but he's quiet in a crowd. He calls me weird all the time. He smiles when he says it, it's usually followed by a hug from him or some goofy interaction. Weird and wonderful, yes. He's an individual.

 

 

My kids will not be returning to PS after this year. I see their self confidence slowly eroding, and their relationships with each other have become full of irritation and Im not ok with it.

 

I'm sorry they had this experience. I came out of high school with zippo self-esteem BECAUSE I was different. I didn't have anyone teaching/mentoring me that it was okay if you didn't fit into one of the top five cliques of the school. I really thought because I wasn't appreciated in school there was no way the real world would accept me. I'm 43 and it took years to get over that.

 

My dh had a similar experience, but crashed off a different cliff.

 

My son can function in society, but he is quirky. I would never squash that. Homeschooling allows him the safety and ability to be himself. He'd be a different person if he were in public/private school.

 

To that end, I encourage individualism in our schooling. He gets some say in the direction we take and we study people who live/lived outside the box. I also think classical education is a godsend for those odd kids. We are teaching them to think critically and stand up for their beliefs. My hope is that ds will be able to defend his convictions (whatever they turn out to be), live with intention, and always be true to himself.

[mytwomonkeys]

my son is a little odd, but my daughter is fairly mainstream. she loves justin bieber, skinny jeans, converse, disney, junk food, etc. she is very comfortable in her own skin though & i do notice that although she likes many mainstream things, she is also very "young" in other aspects (likes baby dolls, barbies, sleeps with a blanket, believes in santa, etc). i'm not saying PS kids can't do those things, but in comparison to many of her own cousins and PS friends, she still seems rather innocent. i am confident she'll grow up to be a lovely person, whatever that looks like:)

[Janie Grace]

I think my kids are somewhere in the middle of the oddness continuum. They converse pretty naturally with peers and adults but they are definitely out of the loop on pop culture. Kind of like their parents, I guess. ;)

[Dawn in OH]

I guess you need to define odd.

 

Is it odd to be able to interact with adults? If yes, then my children are odd.

 

Is it odd to prefer a book over TV? If yes, then my children are odd.

 

Is it odd not to know who Hannah Montana is? If yes, then my children are odd.

 

But we aren't just odd because we homeschool.

 

Is it odd to not eat fast food at least once a week? If yes, then we are odd.

 

Is it odd to not drink soda? If yes, then we are odd.

 

Is it odd to not be a sports fan in Cleveland, Ohio? Oh hell yes! We are odd.

 

We do lots of things that the "average American" would consider odd. Do we want to be "normal"? No thank you!

[Linda1951]

My DD is almost 17 is taking driving school and she said that all the boys from high school that are in there talk and text during the class. Well they will not be doing that MOnday because the teacher is making them move up to the front of the class.

Plus they do not call her to remind her when her driving class is because she has a day planner and makes the appointments herself and marks them and shows up. She is responsible. These kids are not, a lot of them are missing their driving lesson and they have to pay for it extra. Proves they are not learning anything in high school. They act like that in driving school, Lord only knows how they act in class at school.

[Copswife]

Dawn, I loved your post! We must be "odd" as well. No cable tv either. :)

[woolybear]

They are not odd, they are just themselves. I heard a story (not first hand) of a girl around here who had been in school, then was homeschooled, then was going back to school. She said (something to this effect) "I'm sorry to be going back to school. I like being myself."

[mrsrevmeg]

Our family is odd. Last night they were talking about playing a Star Wars video game. Benjamin was saying his character is going to the dark side. I said in our family, we are all on the dork side. They got cracked up about that one.

My kids were odd before homeschooling. I'm not going to take the oddness out of them. To be honest, some of the weirdest people I have ever seen are in the public school system. I used to feel bad when people would make comments, now I just say, "Have you been to a school lately? It is FULL of weirdos." That shuts up old biddys rather quickly.

[lionfamily1999]

I thought her saying they are not "assimilated" made perfect sense. They are odd, because they are not assimilated.

[susankenny]

Well, we don't have cable, we do not keep junk food in the house (or eat out at all for that matter,our budget won't allow it), & I certainly don't keep up with the latest fashions. Yet, my children seem to enjoy & know about all of these things. I'm certainly not implying that a child "should" know these things, but just because they do, doesn't mean the parents are indulging in it. And because they like "xyz", certainly doesn't mean they can't equally enjoy a book, a healthy meal, or cultural events. It doesn't have to be "us" vs. "them". Public school & homeschool children alike have weird, odd, mainstream, and everything in-between families in both circles.

 

Susan

[flobee76]

No offense, but I've always thought homeschooled children are a little bit odd and quirky (mine included - I think this may have happened whether or not we homeschooled - the apple doesn't fall far from the tree:001_smile:). Here's some excellent proof!

 

http://www.homeschoolnewslink.com/blog/?p=629

 

Enjoy-

KB

 

:iagree:

 

I haven't read through all the posts, but I think my oldest is sort of quirky, but she's still quite sociable and other kids love her.

 

I am proud to have and "odd" family. Like a PP, we don't watch a lot of TV, we eat VERY differently from others (raw milk, pastured meats, lots of butter, fat, lard, homemade bread, no boxed snacks, etc.), and my girls LOVE to wear DRESSES ... oh no... DRESSES! ;)

[Haiku]

I think that homeschooled kids tend to be a little quirky for two reasons:

 

1) Parents who homeschool tend to be a little quirky.

 

2) Homeschooled kids don't tend to have as much pressure to be exactly like everyone else. Their quirks aren't squashed out of them by the monolithic youth culture you tend to find in schools. I always feel that my kids are freer to be their authentic selves because they aren't fighting the social acceptance battle that dictates "different = bad."

 

Tara

[RobinF]

I agree it depends on your definition of odd.

[Pretty in Pink]

I guess my kids are odd. I receive a fair amount of comments from friends that have children in public school that my children are different.

 

I am a product of the PS system and I've always been odd. *shrugs*

 

I can say for certain that my kids are pretty awesome! ;)

[elegantlion]

I think that homeschooled kids tend to be a little quirky for two reasons:

 

1) Parents who homeschool tend to be a little quirky.

 

2) Homeschooled kids don't tend to have as much pressure to be exactly like everyone else. Their quirks aren't squashed out of them by the monolithic youth culture you tend to find in schools. I always feel that my kids are freer to be their authentic selves because they aren't fighting the social acceptance battle that dictates "different = bad."

 

Tara

 

:iagree:

 

I think we have two different definitions of odd on this thread, at least two. :tongue_smilie:

 

1. Odd because we expose our children to different things than their peers. That could mean we don't have a TV or it could be mean the entire family only speaks Latin at home because they're just that classical. So that would be a "cultural oddity". Quotes because there nothing wrong with that, all families operate that way to an extent. The only equation missing is the influence of public/private school culture, which is not always a bad thing.

 

2. Odd because of quirky personality traits. Maybe they are socially awkward, maybe they are fiercely individual, maybe they are a walking mini-me of their parents quirkiness. They may be exposed and interact with current pop culture, but still land clearly in the "dork side" (said with love for my dorky family) and probably have the Think Geek t-shirt to prove it.

 

 

I agree with Tara, different does not equal bad. I love this quote, "You are unique, just like everyone else." - I wonder if think Geek has that shirt?

[mcconnellboys]

Vive la nonconformite'!

[ocelotmom]

I read that article the other day and loved it :)

 

Though we weren't homeschooled, both DH and I are definitely odd. Our kids are probably going to be odd to some extent regardless of how we choose to school, either by nature or nurture. Homeschooling is, in part, an attempt to minimize the emotional damage of being odd.

[silliness7]

No offense, but I've always thought homeschooled children are a little bit odd and quirky (mine included - I think this may have happened whether or not we homeschooled - the apple doesn't fall far from the tree:001_smile:). Here's some excellent proof!

 

http://www.homeschoolnewslink.com/blog/?p=629

 

Enjoy-

KB

 

I totally get the point that because of their unique raising, homeschooled children will view the world and their place in it differently. This will look odd or quirky to the vast majority who had a more standardized childhood.

 

So though I agree homeschooled children may appear a bit quirky I would not agree that that makes the child poorly socialized. They can interact with people politely, get along with others, they can follow when necessary, lead when necessary, etc.

[Blossom'sGirl]

Our motto: "You got some weird ones dude" That's what a guy said to us one wet night when he was standing outside the video store smoking his cigarette watching my oldest (who wasn't even school age yet) desperately try to get across the worm covered parking lot without stepping on them. My oldest is just plain strange. I am pretty sure that a school environment would be tough on him.

 

My DH was home-schooled and he is the reason I was always on board for it. Up to when I had met him, I had always dated guys who were either my age or older and they all seemed so immature. Then I met DH, who is three years my junior, and even though he was still in college I found him to be responsible and caring and one that would do his duty. When I married DH, I was working as an engineer, and he was delivering pizzas. Now, he has worked his way to a supervisor position for our county and I can comfortably stay at home. I do think that he is a bit thinner-skinned than his coworkers (he cares about people), but he is working through that and is a very responsible leader.

 

Even though I was public schooled, I have always thought of myself as a little odd. DH is much more "normal" than I am.

[Night Elf]

Well, I believe that schools produce sheep. Those who conform to the system are praised as good. Those who don't conform are condemned as bad. I suppose homeschoolers might be considered odd because we aren't following the herd.

 

Obviously there will be cross-overs. There are some in the school system who excel in their own "odd" way and outpace the herd. There are some homeschoolers who comfortably settle for what is considered 'normal' behavior of children by adults. I really don't see how any one path is superior to another. Different strokes for different folks.

 

Truthfully, all I want for my children is for them to find their niche in life and be happy. I'm not saying I want them to settle for less than they want or that they never seek to improve themselves. But I don't want to force them to conform just so they will fit in. And I don't want to force them to excel just to prove that they can.

 

Both DH and I attended schools and we've always been considered odd. Boy, I could write alot about how each of us had such vastly different experiences. Some of them were influenced by school, but mostly it was family.

[BeckyFL]

Remember this?...

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQoSRfu5z_4

[stripe]

Re this quote in the article

“The socialization of home-educated students was often better than that of their schooled peers.”

 

I googled this phrase, hoping someone would actually SAY where this is from, and I only came up with homeschool websites repeating this, with the same vague "One research study even concluded...." -- but not one cites the actual study. Does anyone know?

 

Some random Russian forum showed the abstract for this article from 1989. Is this supposed to be it?

The Outcomes of Home-based Education: Employment and Other Issues. by Julie Webb, 1989. Eric Number EJ393193 Education Review, Vol.41, No.2, pp 121-133.

Abstract: Examines aspects of the adult lives of wholly or partly home-educated people. Found that all who attempted higher education were successful, that there was no evidence of prejudice regarding employment, and that the socialization of home-educated students was often better than that of their schooled peers.

 

I decided to run a search on ERIC for full text articles about home schooling, and here they are, if anyone wants to check out any of them.

Edited April 9, 2011 by stripe

[tammyw]

Well we're not mainstream, so that makes us different from mainstream. I wouldn't call that odd, but I'm sure some mainstreamers might. Not that I care really - I've always been "not mainstream" since the day my first was born. I like that we're nurturing "unique" in our children - I hate the idea of having to conform to fit in.

[Desert Strawberry]

I'm in agreement with the author of the article. my kids are much more themselves than he other kids their age. They don't know that they shouldn't be.

 

When people have complained that my children "Won't be like all the other kids", I tell them that I don't want them to like the other kids. I want them to be better. IMO mediocrity is a very poor goal.

[6packofun]

Yes, and my kids are still learning to hide it a bit in public. LOL Our kids are odd, but mainly because they aren't clones. Honestly, it can be rough for them sometimes, and yet when we talk about it, they say that they prefer the way they've been raised and how we live (even though we don't have a lot of money, which is one major cause of differences right now :glare: ). I'm glad they'll say that to me because sometimes I need to hear it before I collapse into a puddle of "I suck as a parent!" goo.

[kewb]

As someone who happily lets her freak flag fly; I am raising my kids to do the same.