Janeway Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 How much would this bother you?  At school, they have a discipline chart. They start on green and they move up and down according to their behavior. I am unsure how they move up, but they move down over discipline incidents. In the past, he has moved down over humming and not stopping when told to. Today though, he moved down due to needing to use the restroom outside of restroom time.  My husband is already cold on him going there. He has no friends. I have enjoyed his time there as his class is quite international. I enjoy visiting with the other kids and parents when I am at the school for various things. The kids are so cute and sweet! When I read books in the class, they all sit there with huge smiles and laugh at my stories and are so engaged. The children all seem so sweet to each other and son has a lot of diversity in his life.  I used to always think it would be great for my children to attend an international school. He basically gets this. I feel like there might not be a chance like this again. BUT, academically, well, it just is still mediocre. His sister misses him all day and when he is gone, often asks to go to his school. Oh yeah, his class is 2/3 female, which daughter loves, but son, while he hasn't complained, he just has no friends there. They are nice to him and include him, but, there has been no connection to anyone. He never gets invited anywhere outside of school.  I let what does bother me (the academic vacuum) go by the wayside for favor of the social environment. But I am really bothered by being punished over going to the restroom.  Anyway, back to the original question, and I did already verify that that was why he was punished, how bothered would you be over being punished for this? This sure must be a school that lacks in discipline problems that they end up punishing over using the bathroom an extra time. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 The concept in general bugs me.  This detail more than bugs me. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 That's extreme even for behavior chart schools. I am guessing he's under 10, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I don't have enough info to make a judgement. Did they have a scheduled bathroom break at 10 and ds didn't line up to go but at 10:30 he needed to go? In that case, yeah, I can see the teacher asking him to move his marker.  She's trying to teach him to make better choices.  She didn't deny him the restroom visit when he needed to go, so that's a good thing.  I can't quite reconcile how you say the kids are so awesome and they include him and everything and yet he has no friends. Being invited to things outside of school isn't necessarily an indicator of whether he has friends or not. I look more to whether he has kids to play with at recess and kids to sit with at lunch.   9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I would be on the doorstep of the school tomorrow to talk about urinary tract health. Â So clearly this does not sit well with me. 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 Very bothered. Â Due to an abnormally thick bladder wall, I frequently wet my pants as a child. My 1st grade teacher would deny me access to the bathroom but them bring me to the front of the class and belittle me before she'd let me go change when I wet myself. When my mother got wind of this, the teacher was lucky to remain alive. My doctor, who was treating me in advance of a planned surgical procedure to help correct the problem apparently called the principal and went off on her for allowing that to happen. I think I was moved to a different teacher. 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janeway Posted January 9, 2017 Author Share Posted January 9, 2017 That's extreme even for behavior chart schools. I am guessing he's under 10, right? First grade. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DragonFaerie Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I don't understand. Did he have to move his behavior marker simply because he asked to go to the restroom outside of the scheduled times?  Or was it because he just up and left the classroom to go without permission?  If it's the latter, then yes, I can see the consequence. But if it's the former, I might be annoyed.  On the other hand, what should the teacher do to avoid 20 kids all deciding they have to use the restroom at different times throughout the day?  She'd never get any teaching done!  In any case, I don't have enough information to really say how I'd respond. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I know of a teacher fired for this. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I don't have enough info to make a judgement. Did they have a scheduled bathroom break at 10 and ds didn't line up to go but at 10:30 he needed to go? In that case, yeah, I can see the teacher asking him to move his marker.  She's trying to teach him to make better choices.  She didn't deny him the restroom visit when he needed to go, so that's a good thing.  I can't quite reconcile how you say the kids are so awesome and they include him and everything and yet he has no friends. Being invited to things outside of school isn't necessarily an indicator of whether he has friends or not. I look more to whether he has kids to play with at recess and kids to sit with at lunch.  Although who has a choice in terms of when they need to go to the bathroom? If you NEED to control that, about the only thing you can do is avoid drinking liquids. And even that might not work. So you don't have to go at 10, but then at 10:30 doesn't strike me as an issue of poor choice.  Now maybe he asks to go every five minutes and doesn't really have to go, but I think the burden of proof is on the school for that. I'd first tell the parent that maybe he needs to have something checked out before assuming it is just a behavioral issue. It might be, but they should not assume that. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartlikealion Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 This sounds familiar and I don't like it. Something like kids keeping a perfect record by never being absent or never asking to pee. Stuff that seems to encourage not staying home when you are sick and holding pee when you gotta go. I don't like that. Â I don't know what an international school means. Just that people from different cultures or locations are present? If you're not connecting with any of them, what's the benefit? Is it because he's exposed to more activities that teach him about different cultures maybe? I don't really understand. I don't know how old he is and if he can really articulate his opinion on the school or not. I don't think any school ensures friendships. I'm not really sure what the pros are if the perks (social environment) are not perks to him. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AK_Mom4 Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 It would depend on what privileges they are taking away from him for needing to use the restroom.  If he is losing recess or some other fun thing or if he is being shamed in some way for "being in the red", then I would be furious and totally up their noses about it.   And it wouldn't matter a single bean if I *liked* the class or the teacher.... needing to use the restroom is not "Bad Behavior" and kids shouldn't be punished for it.  3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartlikealion Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 First grade. Â I got my answer after I posted. Â At that age he might not be able to necessarily elaborate on his like/dislike for the school and whether or not he has friends? I don't know. Â I would wonder if he asked to go to the restroom several times in the past outside of normal time or if this was the first time this happened. Either way, not the best approach to getting kids to use the restroom on time. Maybe the reason is they have to get an additional person to watch the class so someone can escort him?? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 My son went to a school like that. Take him out. Take him out now. Don't mess with it. Just, no. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 This school sounds like it has too many strikes against it really. It's not the first complaint you've had about it.   Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I've been a teacher when kids are using the bathroom as a way to get out of things. But, like, teenagers. With no issues. And you wait until they've done it a few times and then you have a chat. And then you check in with parents that there's no medical reasons. And then you start to come down on it. I have, sadly, been involved in a bathroom behavioral chart. Sigh. But for a specific kid for a specific ongoing issue. Â For all kids no matter what, at age six? Um, no way. I'd be very bothered by that. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I've been a teacher when kids are using the bathroom as a way to get out of things. But, like, teenagers. With no issues. And you wait until they've done it a few times and then you have a chat. And then you check in with parents that there's no medical reasons. And then you start to come down on it. I have, sadly, been involved in a bathroom behavioral chart. Sigh. But for a specific kid for a specific ongoing issue.  For all kids no matter what, at age six? Um, no way. I'd be very bothered by that.  That seems fair.   1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 Although who has a choice in terms of when they need to go to the bathroom? If you NEED to control that, about the only thing you can do is avoid drinking liquids. And even that might not work. So you don't have to go at 10, but then at 10:30 doesn't strike me as an issue of poor choice.  Now maybe he asks to go every five minutes and doesn't really have to go, but I think the burden of proof is on the school for that. I'd first tell the parent that maybe he needs to have something checked out before assuming it is just a behavioral issue. It might be, but they should not assume that.  I can see what you mean, but I'm not sure I agree with you.  We don't know when the previous bathroom break was or whether the boy took advantage of it. It's kind of like when you have to be in the car for an hour and you ask the kids to use the bathroom before you go and one kid says she doesn't have to go. Then 15 minutes into the trip the kid suddenly has to pee. Yeah, we get irritated at that. And if it happens all the time, you'd probably make your kid try or use some other kind of method to change that behavior.  That's probably what happened here- other kids probably routinely make excuses to go outside the designated time and rather than keep track of those who abuse it and those who don't, she just decided to penalize everyone who needs to go during off times.    I didn't take it that the kid was denied the restroom break- now that I would take issue with no matter what!! But we don't know enough- is this a pattern for the kid? Did the teacher suspect he just wanted to get out of class? Who knows.  I don't think the 'punishment' was awful. The kid had to move the marker. No big deal. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 (edited) I would be livid. For a first grader, it is not developmentally appropriate to enforce certain "bathroom times".  I can see rules like that in high school when teens use bathroom as an excuse, and even then, the teacher should err on the side of respecting the student as a human being whose bodily needs may not always be predictable. But for a 6 y/o, that would be one of the very rare instances that would have me at the school the following day.  ETA: And this may be TMI, but I'll say it anyway:  there have been instances when I, a grown woman, barely made it through a 50 minute class through a sheer effort of will before dashing to the restroom. Edited January 9, 2017 by regentrude 14 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 It might sound dumb, but teachers trying to micromanage when kids use the restroom was one of the reasons I originally considered homeschooling. (As in, before they were school age...just thinking back on my own school experience.) Â And it's not that I don't sympathize with teachers...it has to be difficult when you are taking care of 20-30 kids and someone has to go to the bathroom at a tricky time. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 This is one of my reasons to homeschool little children. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 (edited) It might sound dumb, but teachers trying to micromanage when kids use the restroom was one of the reasons I originally considered homeschooling. (As in, before they were school age...just thinking back on my own school experience.) Â And it's not that I don't sympathize with teachers...it has to be difficult when you are taking care of 20-30 kids and someone has to go to the bathroom at a tricky time. Â I as so puzzled by this when my kids attended elementary school in this country. The went collectively to the bathroom at prescribed times, with the teacher, even in 6th grade! I find that completely bizarre. Back home in Germany, there are 10-15 minute breaks between periods, during which kids can eat, drink, walk around, play, chat, go to the bathroom - whatever they need. (And if they need to go during class, they can still go). But it is not scheduled and micromanaged, the teacher does not supervise. The can talk in the hallway. I never understood why kids had to be punished for talking in the hallway in the US. I was appalled by the overabundance of strict rules - it is entirely possible to run schools without micromanaging every sh*t. (Pun intended) Edited January 9, 2017 by regentrude 19 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaBearTeacher Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 Very bothered. Â Due to an abnormally thick bladder wall, I frequently wet my pants as a child. My 1st grade teacher would deny me access to the bathroom but them bring me to the front of the class and belittle me before she'd let me go change when I wet myself. When my mother got wind of this, the teacher was lucky to remain alive. My doctor, who was treating me in advance of a planned surgical procedure to help correct the problem apparently called the principal and went off on her for allowing that to happen. I think I was moved to a different teacher. Â What a cruel teacher. Â I'm glad your doctor and mom advocated for you. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arctic Bunny Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 It sounds like the school is a great fit for you, but maybe not so much your son? 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 (edited) I haven't read the responses but I know I'll be in the minority. Â My kids are in private school. My 1st grader is a slow-poke, wandering sort. If she is bored, she asks to go to the bathroom and then she takes too long in there. She asks to go potty during Mass every single week. We never let her go and she's not wet herself in church yet! Â I support her teacher doing whatever she needs to do to keep my girl focused. Â ETA--read the responses. My child's teacher is not a monster. She is a very nice woman and a great teacher. If I didn't trust her judgement, I'd feel differently about the bathroom issue, maybe. Edited January 9, 2017 by Moxie 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 (edited) I hate school. (former ps kid, former ps teacher) Â I also hate teacher worship and the teachers who think they actually deserve the worship. Â I'd be irate. Â Yes, some kids use the bathroom or the nurse as an excuse for a little break but there are nice ways to handle that situation. Â . Edited January 9, 2017 by happi duck 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MEmama Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 DS had a classmate in kindergarten and grade 1 who got in trouble for needing to use the washroom. He was denied requests, so had no choice to just get up and go. There was a lot of stress and some medical stuff going on there that was discovered later. Seemed obvious to me, but the teacher couldn't be bothered with considering there might be an underlying problem. Â Sorry yours has to go through this. :( 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted January 9, 2017 Share Posted January 9, 2017 I as so puzzled by this when my kids attended elementary school in this country. The went collectively to the bathroom at prescribed times, with the teacher, even in 6th grade! I find that completely bizarre. Back home in Germany, there are 10-15 minute breaks between periods, during which kids can eat, drink, walk around, play, chat, go to the bathroom - whatever they need. (And if they need to go during class, they can still go). But it is not scheduled and micromanaged, the teacher does not supervise. The can talk in the hallway. I never understood why kids had to be punished for talking in the hallway in the US. I was appalled by the overabundance of strict rules - it is entirely possible to run schools without micromanaging every sh*t. (Pun intended)  The way they do it in Germany would be awesome.  Students would be more focused if they had occasional breaks and some choices on how to spend it.  Our oldest two attended an elementary school where the kids had to be silent in the halls even before or after school, and could only walk on the right side, and no stopping in the hall. That was nuts, but the school they came from was too wild, with kids running all over and screaming in the halls. Happy medium, please.  Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I haven't read the responses but I know I'll be in the minority. Â My kids are in private school. My 1st grader is a slow-poke, wandering sort. If she is bored, she asks to go to the bathroom and then she takes too long in there. She asks to go potty during Mass every single week. We never let her go and she's not wet herself in church yet! Â I support her teacher doing whatever she needs to do to keep my girl focused. Â ETA--read the responses. My child's teacher is not a monster. She is a very nice woman and a great teacher. If I didn't trust her judgement, I'd feel differently about the bathroom issue, maybe. Â Having been in the classroom, I'd absolutely support a teacher being strict about bathroom time on a case by case basis, like in a situation like this. It's the blanket nature of the rule that is so off - and the fact that Janeway has ongoing issues with the school and teacher that makes it suspicious. There's a huge gulf between this totally reasonable approach to a particular slow poke kid and having a behavior chart where all kids are penalized if they use the bathroom outside of a strict bathroom time. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyroo Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I guess it would depend on how the reward/punishment chart was set up. Â I could understand, for example, discouraging "disruptions". Â Humming is a disruption, inappropriate talking is a disruption, wandering around is a disruption and asking to go to the bathroom during a teaching time is a disruption. Â So, if each disruption counted against you, but you had to lose several points before any consequences were imposed, then a child would not be "punished" for going to the bathroom unless they had already repeatedly disrupted the class. Â Wendy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartlikealion Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I as so puzzled by this when my kids attended elementary school in this country. The went collectively to the bathroom at prescribed times, with the teacher, even in 6th grade! I find that completely bizarre. Back home in Germany, there are 10-15 minute breaks between periods, during which kids can eat, drink, walk around, play, chat, go to the bathroom - whatever they need. (And if they need to go during class, they can still go). But it is not scheduled and micromanaged, the teacher does not supervise. The can talk in the hallway. I never understood why kids had to be punished for talking in the hallway in the US. I was appalled by the overabundance of strict rules - it is entirely possible to run schools without micromanaging every sh*t. (Pun intended) Â It varies even among US schools. I went to two elementary schools. Run completely differently. My first school we were supposed to use the restroom during recess/lunch, but I don't recall a punishment system?? It's hard to say if there was one. But I do know that my fourth grade teacher was really laid back about it. He had a white board eraser with half a paper plate stuffed in the top. There were two of these. One paper plate said BOYS and one said GIRLS and if you had to use the restroom, you placed it on your desk and left. No one (the I recall) abused it. I don't think it even got used every day. In that school we could talk in the cafeteria and eat with our peers. In the next school we had to eat at a table with our teacher and she had red, yellow and green cups to monitor our noise level. I hated it. Also, our teacher had to join us for recess. Like she literally played with us. I thought it was weird Lol. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janeway Posted January 10, 2017 Author Share Posted January 10, 2017 I guess it would depend on how the reward/punishment chart was set up. Â I could understand, for example, discouraging "disruptions". Â Humming is a disruption, inappropriate talking is a disruption, wandering around is a disruption and asking to go to the bathroom during a teaching time is a disruption. Â So, if each disruption counted against you, but you had to lose several points before any consequences were imposed, then a child would not be "punished" for going to the bathroom unless they had already repeatedly disrupted the class. Â Wendy The chart is a big chart posted on the wall in the front of the classroom. Each child has a clip with their name on it on the chart. They start at green. They move down once and it is yellow. Then orange, and last, red. If you make it to red, you go to the principals office. He has been in the principals office before, but he deserved it. He was not aggressive toward anyone. He kept talking about his "butt." The other kids were laughing so he kept doing it. His clip kept going down and eventually, he got sent to the principal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AimeeM Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 How much would it bother me? The word "bother" doesn't do justice to the amount of livid I would be. And, yeah, they would know about it - the next day, before I considered dropping my kid off at the same school.   2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyroo Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 The chart is a big chart posted on the wall in the front of the classroom. Each child has a clip with their name on it on the chart. They start at green. They move down once and it is yellow. Then orange, and last, red. If you make it to red, you go to the principals office. He has been in the principals office before, but he deserved it. He was not aggressive toward anyone. He kept talking about his "butt." The other kids were laughing so he kept doing it. His clip kept going down and eventually, he got sent to the principal. Â I would not be comfortable with that system. Â Wendy 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 There are cases where the bare bones of simply moving around on a chart for a minor misjudgement (ie declining a designated washroom time, but needing it later) in order to encourage children to aim for the goal of excellent classroom-style behaviour... Maybe it could be ok. With the details shared here, it's definitely not ok. Â I imagine it could be done well, theoretically. It's not being done well in this classroom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 (edited) At the school where I worked, kids could go when they needed to. I don't recall a child abusing it, but if there had appeared to be an issue, we would have first talked with the parent to get their view and to find out about any potential medical issues.  It's not always a matter of choice. On a recent trip, I had to go 2-3 times about 30 min after I had just gone. I have no idea what was going on--some kind of diruretic effect to be sure, but I'm not sure what triggered it. Edited January 10, 2017 by Laurie4b Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I'm not at all OK with punishing kids for using the bathroom. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SanDiegoMom Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 When my twins were in 2nd grade I came in twice a week to do math with my son for 45 min before recess. The rule was something like you could go to the bathroom between 8:45 and 9:15, but you had to wait until recess if it was anytime after 9:15 (recess was at 10). I mean, you could still go, but you got "The Look". So my son would wiggle and shake and I would tell him to just ask and he would never do it. He lived in fear of getting "The Look". She was a very well meaning teacher who really liked my kids and enjoyed teaching, but she was an extremely organized person burdened with close to thirty 2nd graders and was known for being the best for keeping the boys in line. Which was a poor fit for my overly sensitive people pleasing boy. Â That was just one of the many reasons I started homeschooling. I felt like it was so insulting to judge someone for needing to use the restroom. Â Now if it obviously being abused, that's something different. But that's definitely a case by case basis and shouldn't be a classroom wide rule. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 People should not be denied control over their own bodies. 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
readinmom Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 At my site, some teachers issue bathroom passes (4) for the semester. Â If you turn them in at the end, you get extra credit. Â My bathroom policy is, "If you need to go, you need to go." Â You can't regulate someone's bladder. Â Being disciplined for something so basic and natural as using the bathroom is ridiculous. Â If a kid was abusing bathroom privileges (leaving during test/avoiding work) then it would be addressed. Â Â We once had a note sent home saying dd used the bathroom too frequently and it was interfering with instruction. If she needed to use it more, we needed a medical note. Â She used it twice a day, once in the morning, and another about an hour after lunch. Â Â Sorry this happened! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 It would piss me off to no end, but it doesn't surprise me. I am not sure if it's unique to Texas, but anecdotally it is not uncommon in TX public schools. The jr high and high schools a district over have teachers who add or deduct points to your grade point for using the rest room during class. I think it's stupid and just another example of totalitarian rule schools here, and elsewhere with their zero tolerance bullshit, love to exemplify. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarasue7272 Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 I don't think there is enough information here. As a sub, kids of all ages abuse going to the bathroom all the time. Once you say yes to one, they all are dying to go. I was a long term sub last fall for 2nd grade, there were a few kids (3 out of 20) that asked to go all the time to get out of class. They would stay there as long as possible. Yes, 7 year olds try to get out of class. Also, moving your clip might not be a huge deal. I think you should just email the teacher and ask what happened and what the bathroom policy is. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 (edited) I don't think there is enough information here. As a sub, kids of all ages abuse going to the bathroom all the time. Once you say yes to one, they all are dying to go. I was a long term sub last fall for 2nd grade, there were a few kids (3 out of 20) that asked to go all the time to get out of class. They would stay there as long as possible. Yes, 7 year olds try to get out of class. Also, moving your clip might not be a huge deal. I think you should just email the teacher and ask what happened and what the bathroom policy is. Â What do you mean, "As a sub, kids of all ages abuse going to the bathroom..." Do you mean they are substituting trips to the bathroom for paying attention to their work, or for participating in class activities? Edited January 10, 2017 by Tibbie Dunbar 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 Another perspective on this might be to wonder about what makes children in some learning environments prefer a toilet stall to a classroom. (If it isn't believed to be honestly their toilet needs and/or the immature management of such needs.) Many children prefer recess over structured learning, but if I discovered a (hypothetical) case where an overwhelming number of fairly young children regularly preferred a toileting space over their classroom... I would have questions about the type of learning environment that classroom actually is. (Just questions, not assumptions.) 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wendyroo Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 Another perspective on this might be to wonder about what makes children in some learning environments prefer a toilet stall to a classroom. (If it isn't believed to be honestly their toilet needs and/or the immature management of such needs.) Many children prefer recess over structured learning, but if I discovered a (hypothetical) case where an overwhelming number of fairly young children regularly preferred a toileting space over their classroom... I would have questions about the type of learning environment that classroom actually is. (Just questions, not assumptions.) Â I went to elementary a million years ago, but back then the kids were abusing bathroom privileges in order to roam the halls and congregate in the bathrooms. Â Â One kid would "go to the bathroom", but take the scenic route passing by other classrooms and catching the eye of his friends who would then claim they needed to go as well. Â It was not uncommon for a teacher to eventually go in the bathroom and send out a dozen kids from various classes who had been hanging out in there for 20 minutes. Â For the five years I was at that elementary, I avoided EVER going into any of the bathrooms even once because with the cool kids hanging out there, they were a prime place for bullying to happen away from supervision. Â Wendy 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 A child shouldn't be penalized for needing to use the restroom and actually using it. A teacher may need to say (privately) "Hey buddy, we just went on the way back inside from recess. Are you feeling ok? Tomorrow, try to use it then so you don't miss math." Or something more strict if it's a situation like Moxie described and get the parents involved to make sure it's not a health issue. Â Discipline for using the restroom? No. Discipline for yelling "I gotta pee!" or disrupting class intentionally that's tangentially related to using the restroom could be necessary. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gentlemommy Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 My dh was forbidden to use the restroom in elementary school and had an accident. It was not in K-3rd grade btw, and it was not just pee. He still gets anxious when we aren't near a restroom. I would be furious and would pull him out. No excuse for not letting a kid go to the bathroom! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luuknam Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 Another perspective on this might be to wonder about what makes children in some learning environments prefer a toilet stall to a classroom. (If it isn't believed to be honestly their toilet needs and/or the immature management of such needs.) Many children prefer recess over structured learning, but if I discovered a (hypothetical) case where an overwhelming number of fairly young children regularly preferred a toileting space over their classroom... I would have questions about the type of learning environment that classroom actually is. (Just questions, not assumptions.) Â Some kids like to play with the water in the bathroom sink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justasque Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 My son went to a school like that. Take him out. Take him out now. Don't mess with it. Just, no.  THIS.   At the school where I worked, kids could go when they needed to. I don't recall a child abusing it, but if there had appeared to be an issue, we would have first talked with the parent to get their view and to find out about any potential medical issues.  It's not always a matter of choice. On a recent trip, I had to go 2-3 times about 30 min after I had just gone. I have no idea what was going on--some kind of diruretic effect to be sure, but I'm not sure what triggered it.  Because this.   If there appears to be an issue with frequent bathroom use, or preferring to use the bathroom at a time different than when the entire class goes together (if that's how it's usually done), then the teacher FIRST needs to discuss the issue with the parent to rule out medical or emotional issues.  AND even then, should be sensitive to the fact that there may be underlying medical or emotional issues that are as yet unrecognized and undiagnosed.  Restricting bathroom use by a first grader, or calling public attention to frequency of use, or otherwise publicly shaming a first grader about bathroom use, is unacceptable.  And it does not create a good environment for learning.  WHEN YA GOTTA PEE, YA GOTTA PEE.   4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SparklyUnicorn Posted January 10, 2017 Share Posted January 10, 2017 It would piss me off to no end, but it doesn't surprise me. I am not sure if it's unique to Texas, but anecdotally it is not uncommon in TX public schools. The jr high and high schools a district over have teachers who add or deduct points to your grade point for using the rest room during class. I think it's stupid and just another example of totalitarian rule schools here, and elsewhere with their zero tolerance bullshit, love to exemplify.  This is insane. They only give you enough time in between to get to your next class. When in hell are you supposed to go to the bathroom? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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