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Do you still view the sixteenth birthday as a milestone/big deal?


Ginevra
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Just wondering. dS just turned 16 and, while I wanted it to be special in the sense that I want my child's birthday to be special, I don't regard 16 as so much of a milestone now. I guess because nobody gets their driver's license on that day (in this state) anymore. Just wondering if others feel the same. For what it's worth, though, I'm not a big Pomp and Circumstance type of person to begin with, so probably that colors my view.

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Sweet sixteens are not a huge part of my current cultural experience. I know people who have made a big deal and others who have kept it low key. In my current circle it tends to be on the low key side. The teen may or may have a small get together.

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Hmm, 16 used to be the age when you could get a "real job" as well as drive.  And quit school and get married and a few other things.  Now, I don't know what you can do at 16 that is so special any more.

 

Many with my girls' background do a bit 15th birthday.  So if I do a biggie before 18, I might make it the 15th.  I don't know, though.  I guess if they don't make a fuss, I probably won't either.

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Not really, other than in this state it is still the age when you can apply for a learner's permit. So my ds is looking forward to that.  Other than that, I don't know of anything particularly special.  I think of it as the end of...I don't really have a word for it... teen years?  I know that's not right.  Its just that 17 seems like practically an adult, they are senior in high school and halfway out the door.  So, 16 fees like the last stop for a lot of things. 

 

 

aaaand I just made myself cry.

 

Thanks Quill!

 

(that was a joke)

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My mom did something really special for my sweet 16 (surprised me with a lunch with my closest friends at a very fancy hotel -- we were not well off, so this was a huge deal). So I wanted to do something special for my dd. I surprised her with tickets to Taylor Swift (her first concert!). We took a road trip together to the town where she was playing and stayed in a nice hotel. We had so much fun. It's not because I think sixteen is a magic number, but sometimes it takes a "milestone" to help nudge me to make a memory and express my love in a bigger-than-usual way. I'm so glad I did.  :wub:

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I don't think it's a big deal.  My daughter did have a sweet 16 party with a friend - their birthdays are about a week apart.  I didn't take it very seriously.  (The other mother did.  Hoo boy did she ever.)   It's not a big deal to me. 

 

18th birthday is a little bigger, because in the US it is the day a child becomes an adult in most ways.  But we still don't go crazy with pomp and circumstance because while the day is special because I love my children and am glad they were born, there is no accomplishment to celebrate. 

 

 

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I think it all used to be about driving. Getting that driver's license is a big deal (or it was to me.) It legally recognizes that you've hit a certain level of maturity. I think *that's* the milestone (driving), not the age itself.

 

But nowadays, since you can't get your license on your 16th birthday it doesn't feel the same as it used to.

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Not a big deal, in our family anyway. 18 was a big deal, because they became adults. Each of my kids had a best friend whose family was also very important in their lives. My daughter has two of those. I invited the friend(s) and the whole family for dinner and games (Minute to Win It type stuff, things where there would be laughter) to celebrate. None of my kids wanted a party with a bunch of friends and all were happy with having the special family over. It was a good time.

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Most of dd's friends had big sweet 16 parties. Here you can get your driver's license on your 16th birthday, so maybe that is why it is still big. Dd didn't want a party. She just wanted her license. :) Ds did have a party for his 16th. It was the only birthday party he had after the children's parties at elementary ages. 

 

We're just not big celebration people. I make a cake for every birthday and they get a present or a few presents from us, but that is it.

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Sort-of? LOL! We do parties certain years, and other years not, and 16 was one of the party years. Our party years were 6, 8, 10, 13, 16. (Actually I'm fuzzy on the 6 & 8 now, but I think that's what we did!) Non-party years we either celebrate with just family (sometimes by going out together), or when they were younger they could have a friend stay overnight. 

 

My son was never very elaborate in his wishes (guys over to hang out or go to a specialty-pizza place), but my dd had a "detective" party for her 13th (complete with clues leading all over town), and for her 16th asked if we could go to a local place that has tunnels large enough for teens. They do parties but were surprised a 16 yo wanted one, LOL! But she and her friends had a blast, totally worth it. 

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My twins' birthday and our anniversary are two days apart in late June.  The year they turned 16 and dh and I had our 20th anniversary, we took a big family trip to Europe (left a day after the twins' birthday and were there on our anniversary).  I wish I could pretend that I planned all that to celebrate these special milestones, but the honest truth is that I planned whole the trip and only later realized any of this... :tongue_smilie:  But if they every complain they didn't have a sweet 16 bash, I can say "hey, we took you to Europe!" :lol:

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My twins' birthday and our anniversary are two days apart in late June. The year they turned 16 and dh and I had our 20th anniversary, we took a big family trip to Europe (left a day after the twins' birthday and were there on our anniversary). I wish I could pretend that I planned all that to celebrate these special milestones, but the honest truth is that I planned whole the trip and only later realized any of this... :tongue_smilie: But if they every complain they didn't have a sweet 16 bash, I can say "hey, we took you to Europe!" :lol:

Love it!

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I think for kids who are more social, 16 is a great opportunity to have a memorable party with friends. For my introverts, they wouldn't really enjoy that--it would be more social pressure than they are comfortable with, I think. But I could see doing something extra-special within the family, like the concert idea above.

 

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I have my first one coming up on sixteen and it will be a big deal because she will get her learner's permit that day. So, for us it will still be about driving (she will not have ever driven before then) but it won't be the freedom of being able to drive on her own. She's still excited, though. We will probably do the same thing for youngest and not do formal driver's ed/permit at fifteen and wait for license till 16 and 9 months. It's only a three month difference if we did the driver's ed. 

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For us it is a big party year.  DD15 has been planning her party for months already and it isn't for 6 more months.  I do think it's still a big deal because even if they can't drive, in our state, they are old enough to get a job without a work permit.  DD is looking more forward to that than driving!

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The "Sweet Sixteen" used to be a milestone birthday because it used to coincide with the age of being a debutante, or of being presented at cotillion. The official presentation into society signaled that the girl was available for courtship and marriage.

 

Obviously, that pretty much isn't the case these days, unless you are from the upper, upper echelons of society where debutante balls are still common.

 

That's what I was going to say.

 

Dd almost joined cotillion 3 years ago--they meet once a month and learn manners and dancing, and have dances several times a year. IDK if they do the presentation anymore or if debs is separate for those who have gone thru cotillion, but we do know those who do this. We're not high society by any means! lol

 

Dd will be 16 in the spring. I don't think she wants a big party, but we will do something special.

 

I got a dulcimer on my 16th. Wanted a party!

 

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Just wondering. dS just turned 16 and, while I wanted it to be special in the sense that I want my child's birthday to be special, I don't regard 16 as so much of a milestone now. I guess because nobody gets their driver's license on that day (in this state) anymore. Just wondering if others feel the same. For what it's worth, though, I'm not a big Pomp and Circumstance type of person to begin with, so probably that colors my view.

 

If it's important to the kid, yes. But just me? I'm like you, not one for pomp and circumstance.

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