Laura in VA Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 As some of you know, I have stated in past threads that I have had abortions. Evidently, some people think that takes away my "right" to to be anti-abortion, or try to stop them in any way. I've been told that I will have to "justify" those 2 abortions before God and I've been called a sanctimonious twit. I regret many foolish decisions I made as a teenager, abortion is only one of them, yet it has affected me in a deeply and in ways that I do not care to share with others. I'm a big girl, but I do think it's a shame that we can't be open with each other and not be attacked. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DB in NJ Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 As some of you know, I have stated in past threads that I have had abortions. Evidently, some people think that takes away my "right" to to be anti-abortion, or try to stop them in any way. I've been told that I will have to "justify" those 2 abortions before God and I've been called a sanctimonious twit. I regret many foolish decisions I made as a teenager, abortion is only one of them, yet it has affected me in a deeply and in ways that I do not care to share with others. I'm a big girl, but I do think it's a shame that we can't be open with each other and not be attacked. My soul.... ((((Laura)))) What a bunch of idiots. You have every right to be anti-abortion -- you know first-hand the pain, regret, and suffering that go with it. Sanctimonious? I don't think so. Good grief....this is enough to make me want to go away and not come back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nestof3 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I see no reason why you cannot be anti-abortion. I think you have a pretty good grasp on the effects of abortion, and speak from experience which many lack. Just ignore those comments. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*anj* Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Dear Laura, That just makes me extraordinarily sad. And angry. I'm sorry that there are those among us who pump themselves up by attacking others. I'm sorry that this has proven to be an unsafe place for you. I am sorry that people took your transparency and used it as an attack weapon. I just don't understand what is wrong with some people. :confused: :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RhondaM. Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 My soul.... ((((Laura)))) What a bunch of idiots. You have every right to be anti-abortion -- you know first-hand the pain, regret, and suffering that go with it. Sanctimonious? I don't think so. Good grief....this is enough to make me want to go away and not come back. :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DB in NJ Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Dear Laura,That just makes me extraordinarily sad. And angry. I'm sorry that there are those among us who pump themselves up by attacking others. I'm sorry that this has proven to be an unsafe place for you. I am sorry that people took your transparency and used it as an attack weapon. I just don't understand what is wrong with some people. :confused: :grouphug: Anj, you said -- with grace -- what I was trying to say. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhonda in TX Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 One of my dearest friends had an abortion and it is the biggest regret of her life. I know that God has forgiven her, and He has forgiven you, too. However, even with forgiveness, her pain is not gone. I'm sorry people have treated you this way. I do not understand why, just because you made a mistake, you are not entitled to wish NOBODY would make that mistake. It makes no sense. :grouphug::grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 We may be on opposite sides of the debate in question but I have my reasons and you have yours. Your experiences don't make your opinion any less valid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LauraGB Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: Laura, we have all had to make monumental decisions that have changed the course of our lives. It is what makes us human. Just know that not everyone judges you. I think the fact that you have been open enough to be honest counts for something amazing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TN Mama Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kat19 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunshine Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: I am so sorry there are ignoramous's out there. If anyone has a right to be against abortion it is you. And me, and a million others. But remember that you will always be attacked, disliked, ridiculed, put down and other exciting things for your beliefs. Especially if they are God centered, God glorifying or just plain moral. It is an evil time we live in. Even Socrates thought so those many years ago!! Try not to take it to heart. I know it may be hard when it is happening, but try to look at the person as someone who doesn't have a clue.... and muster up some pity. That is easier for me than compassion, but you are probably sweeter than me and can do the compassion thing~! :grouphug:hug you:grouphug:hug you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSMom2One Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Dear Laura in VA, Anyone that causes you grief over this issue does not deserve your time or energy to read or respond to in answer. You are a woman of integrity and courage and I applaud you for your transparency. In the end, people will hear you and pay attention to you more than they will hear or pay heed to your scoffers. Your message will have an effect, while the other message will push people away. God bless you! Lucinda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keroro Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 None of us are perfect. I know I am going out on a limb here :001_smile:, but I think almost everyone has regrets about something they have done in the past regardless of religious beliefs. I know I do. Part of getting older and wiser, or the process of sanctification if you have chosen to be on that road, is to learn, grow, and change for the better. As a result we may come to oppose things we once did. I certainly don't think you deserve to be attacked for it. Nor do I think you have to justify or defend yourself to your attackers. In my opinion, it's their actions that are out of line here. They really just sound like bullies. Unfortunately, some people have to tear other people down to a level below them so they can feel good about themselves. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lwilliams1922 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Dear Laura in VA,Anyone that causes you grief over this issue does not deserve your time or energy to read or respond to in answer. You are a woman of integrity and courage and I applaud you for your transparency. In the end, people will hear you and pay attention to you more than they will hear or pay heed to your scoffers. Your message will have an effect, while the other message will push people away. God bless you! Lucinda :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lwilliams1922 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 None of us are perfect. I know I am going out on a limb here :001_smile:, but I think almost everyone has regrets about something they have done in the past regardless of religious beliefs. I know I do. Part of getting older and wiser, or the process of sanctification if you have chosen to be on that road, is to learn, grow, and change for the better. As a result we may come to oppose things we once did. I certainly don't think you deserve to be attacked for it. Nor do I think you have to justify or defend yourself to your attackers. In my opinion, it's their actions that are out of line here. They really just sound like bullies. Unfortunately, some people have to tear other people down to a level below them so they can feel good about themselves. :grouphug: :iagree: AGAIN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer3141 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I don't understand your position but I'm giving you some rep in case anyone else has given you bad rep. And i'm still glad you're here so we can see all the sides to the issues. :grouphug: Jen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gamommy Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I am truly appalled to hear that you've been attacked in this manner. I heartily agree with other posters that you are absolutely entitled to your pro-life stance. I'm certain that you understand the ramifications of this issue in a way that many others don't. I applaud you for your honesty and transparency. Thank you most sincerely for sharing your heart with us. I'm sorry that in doing so you've been subjected to additional pain. Blessings, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ekarl2 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Isn't the Roe of Roe v Wade now pro-life? There are tons of women who have become pro-life after makign the decision themselves earlier to end one. I'm so glad, Laura, that you've been blessed with children. I know of a women who had abortions in her 20's. She married in her early thirties and has been unable to carry a pregnancy ... the doctors say it is because her reproductive organs are messed up from the two abortions she had. How about having to live with that? She wants so desperately to have a child now and can't because of the two she terminated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debbie in OR Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 abortions that you can be anti-abortion. I stay off of the boards mostly but I could not let this go by. Every one who has posted has said it all better than I could so I just wanted to join in support. I am with you in deed, as well, which is exactly why, I, too, am now anti-abortion and appreciate so much your willingness to be transparent with your life and regrets. Hugs alot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karenciavo Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 You've been attacked here? Sorry for that Laura. :grouphug: We all will need to give an account one day, and those who think they are without sin quite mistake the matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: I've got nothing profound to add to what has already been said, but know that my heart is heavy & sad for you right now :grouphug:. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ncmomo3 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 It is exactly BECAUSE of your abortions that you can be anti-abortion. I stay off of the boards mostly but I could not let this go by. Hugs alot. Debbie beat me to it, but that was my thought also. Big hugs to you Shame on some for very poor behavior. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I'm so sorry! :grouphug: We ALL make mistakes that we later regret and it is not right for anyone to think that they are better just because they haven't done the same thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom to Aly Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Laura: I have written here about the death of my first child, which is something I have never, and will never, completely recover from. Many have told me that should make me even more anti-choice, but it hasn't. I am vehemently pro-choice. As long as a woman must carry a child, I feel it is her right to choose, at an early stage only. No late stage, no partial birth, etc. What I feel about it morally is not the issue to me, I feel it is about a woman's right to do what she will with her body, and that no one else should be able to tell her what she has to do. That said, I do feel it is wrong, religiously, morally, etc. I also feel, especially once you have had children, and even before, it must be one of the most painful and horrible decisions you can ever have to make in your life, whether you realize it at the time or not. I have known women, and girls, who have had to make that choice, and have chosen both ways. I have known those same people to regret some of their decisions for the rest of their lives. In my opinion, no one on this Earth has the right to judge you for what you decided to do with your body, no matter how they feel about the law that allowed you to do it. I can only imagine what you might feel in reference to your decisions, and hope that you can have the courage and insight to forgive yourself (if you are religious, I am sure any loving and caring God would, as well, for we are human, and therefore fallible, just as God made us). I suppose I do not believe anyone has the right to judge you, for they cannot imagine how much harder it is for you, judging yourself. I so admire your candor, especially on these boards which, in my opinion, have a very definite conservative, religious slant, in admitting such a personal and difficult thing. And I can perfectly understand why your experience would make you anti-choice. One thing that I have learned, from my experiences, is to never regret anything in my life. All I could do, after the death of my first daughter, was ask why, what if, for years and years. Then, 8 & 1/2 years later, I had my second daughter, who lived. And I stopped asking, I stopped regretting. Because, I know--if one thing in my life had been different, any one thing, I wouldn't have her. That, I could not imagine. And I know, my whole life has led me to this, being her mother. And it was all worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camibami Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Wow. That is so incredibly out of line, I am almost speechless. You are just as entitled to your feelings on abortion as anyone else- maybe more so, because you have personal experience with it. Perhaps if more women were open in their pain and experiences, we could have an honest dialog in this country about the issue, instead of both sides hurling anger. I think those on both sides forget there are real women involved in this issue, and not everything is black and white. Honest conversations about abortion can only help. I have steadfastly been boycotting the "rep" system, my own little personal protest of one. But, I rep'd you, to make up for that sanctamonious twit who emailed you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brigitte Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Wow. I am so sorry you have been treated badly. It takes a lot of courage to look back on life and see what we would change and be willing to share it with others so they don't travel the hard road you did. It is just wrong to condemn someone for that. Again, I am sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in the Kootenays Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I'm sorry that you've had to make those difficult decisions. I hope you're not too hard on your younger self because you made those decisions made on the best information you had then. And I'm most sorry that you've been attacked while showing such courage. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slartibartfast Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I am sorry you were attacked. I don't agree with your stance, but I find that awful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pammy Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 that others here have voiced their support and encouragement for you. I would never condemn a sister who has suffered the pain of abortion. I have counseled many women and I know from my personal experiences that it was a difficult ordeal. God loves you and forgives you, and anyone who says otherwise should remember the words Jesus spoke about he who is without sin... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
akmommy Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: I don't have much to add that hasn't already been said, but i wanted to add my hugs and let you know that i admire your courage to share something so painfully personal.:grouphug: :grouphug: akmommy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: I am sorry you were attacked. I could say more, but shall leave it there. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura in VA Posted August 25, 2008 Author Share Posted August 25, 2008 that others here have voiced their support and encouragement for you. I would never condemn a sister who has suffered the pain of abortion. I have counseled many women and I know from my personal experiences that it was a difficult ordeal. God loves you and forgives you, and anyone who says otherwise should remember the words Jesus spoke about he who is without sin... Thank you for the kind words. I posted about my abortions a few months ago (?). The attacks came from my posting in the Republican/Abortion thread yesterday. I was attacked because I am now anti-abortion and they feel as though I have no right to take that stance since I had abortions in the past. I am pretty certain that the attacks were not coming from people who are pro-choice and telling me that it's hypocritical of me to be pro-life since I had abortions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Laura.......:grouphug:.......and........:grouphug:.......and just to be sure......:grouphug: You have been so courageous to open yourself up in such a public forum. The fact that you have had the nerve to say "I have been there, I have done that" makes you UNIQUELY qualified to say that abortion is the wrong answer to a difficult question. I have revealed things about past mistakes, esp. concerning my klutzy parenting. I would hate to think that someone would say that those revelations disqualified me from offering an opinion based on my past. Just one more time, Dear.......:grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nakia Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Laura, I haven't been here long and did not know that you had an abortion in the past. But when I read that someone brought that up in a thread, I was so hurt for you. I cannot believe someone would stoop to that. I am so sorry you were hurt. Of course you have a right to believe any way you want to believe. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in CA Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Laura :grouphug: I respect your honesty and transparency. God uses all of us, including our past mistakes for the good of his kingdom - keep it up and don't be discouraged by those who are ignorant enough to say that experience disqualifies you from opinion.:grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sharon in SC Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 As some of you know, I have stated in past threads that I have had abortions. Evidently, some people think that takes away my "right" to to be anti-abortion, or try to stop them in any way. I've been told that I will have to "justify" those 2 abortions before God and I've been called a sanctimonious twit. I regret many foolish decisions I made as a teenager, abortion is only one of them, yet it has affected me in a deeply and in ways that I do not care to share with others. I'm a big girl, but I do think it's a shame that we can't be open with each other and not be attacked. :grouphug: You have mail! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LG Gone Wild Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Isn't the Roe of Roe v Wade now pro-life? There are tons of women who have become pro-life after makign the decision themselves earlier to end one. good point Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cin Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I see no reason why you cannot be anti-abortion. I think you have a pretty good grasp on the effects of abortion, and speak from experience which many lack. Just ignore those comments. :iagree::iagree::iagree::iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Isn't the Roe of Roe v Wade now pro-life? There are tons of women who have become pro-life after makign the decision themselves earlier to end one. Well, the court case took 3 years to reach the SCOTUS, she delivered her baby and gave it up for adoption before the court case ever ended. She never had an abortion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NevadaRabbit Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Thank you for the kind words. I posted about my abortions a few months ago (?). The attacks came from my posting in the Republican/Abortion thread yesterday. I was attacked because I am now anti-abortion and they feel as though I have no right to take that stance since I had abortions in the past. I am pretty certain that the attacks were not coming from people who are pro-choice and telling me that it's hypocritical of me to be pro-life since I had abortions. My heart hurts, Laura - how incredibly arrogant are those who would say such a thing. I'd like to ask them: how do we ever learn and grow if it's not through our trials and mistakes we make, suffering the consequences and recognizing the wisdom of choosing a better path? My husband and I did not remain pure before marriage. This line of reasoning would tell us that, since we engaged in premarital sex, we have no right to take a stance for purity before marriage. Hogwash. Some people need to be reminded how far the east is from the west. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ekarl2 Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Well, the court case took 3 years to reach the SCOTUS, she delivered her baby and gave it up for adoption before the court case ever ended. She never had an abortion. I hadn't realized that and stand corrected. But had it been legal when she wanted it, she would have had it (one would assume, since she went to court). Therefore, her feelings changed. She looks back and sees that, in her eyes, the decision she made (even though it wasn't carried through with) is one she would not make now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sharon in SC Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Some people need to be reminded how far the east is from the west. :iagree: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrisN in NY Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 \ You have been so courageous to open yourself up in such a public forum. The fact that you have had the nerve to say "I have been there, I have done that" makes you UNIQUELY qualified to say that abortion is the wrong answer to a difficult question. Well said, Kelli. Laura, I am so sorry that you were treated with such disrespect and cruelty. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mosaicmind Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 As some of you know, I have stated in past threads that I have had abortions. Evidently, some people think that takes away my "right" to to be anti-abortion, or try to stop them in any way. I've been told that I will have to "justify" those 2 abortions before God and I've been called a sanctimonious twit. I regret many foolish decisions I made as a teenager, abortion is only one of them, yet it has affected me in a deeply and in ways that I do not care to share with others. I'm a big girl, but I do think it's a shame that we can't be open with each other and not be attacked. Laura, I have had abortions also and I am grieved that you would be attacked for your anti-abortion stance now. What you did in the past is forgiven and should not be held against you, but we live in a fallen world and unfortunately there are going to be those who believe they have the right to judge. I am sorry, but I am right there with you. :grouphug: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doran Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 I like to believe that at every moment, we are exactly where we are meant to be. In hard times and happy, darkness and light. So, even in the midst of those decisions of your youth that you now wish you could change, you were where you were meant to be. And, today, with these convictions now you have. And, at the receiving end of attacks that seem especially calculating and cruel. And, standing here for what you believe with what has to be a mix of courage and sadness. And, this moment, when you are more compassionate than someone else simply because of what you have lived. It's all there to help you be the gentle hearted soul that you are. I'm sorry that sometimes life hurts. Peace, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Oh Laura, I sure wish you were still down the street, because I could run right over and scoop you up in a big hug--we could go to Starbucks and everything, like that one time, remember? :D I'm so sorry I can't hug ya in real life, but here's one :grouphug: from far away. You are truly never far from my thoughts--I can't tell you how many times I have wondered how you are doing. Please stay on this forum, because we need your experiences, opinions, worldview, kindness and humor. Love to you and AG (and little C). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GSMP Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 :grouphug: You shouldn't have been attacked. You should have been treated with love and compassion and given a hug. No one has the right to judge what you did in years gone past. None of us are righteous enough. Having had an abortion, and dealing with the consequences and heavy heart that it sounds like you have dealt with, you have every right to speak out if you so desire. You have been there....I have not. I cannot begin to know how this has weighed on you over the years. God has forgiven you....if you asked Him to...... Hugs and lots of them.........:grouphug::grouphug: I forgot to say that I skipped all of the other comments.......now I am going back to read. Read through all the comments......more hugs....You have gotten lots of support. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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