itsheresomewhere Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 To the young man, I know it is scary road trying to get your first job but next time leave your mother at home, in the car, anywhere but the interview. She is not the one who is trying to get a job. Signed, The lady who couldn't believe what she was seeing. DS has been asking to go to a certain place and as a reward today, we went. While eating, the table across from us, was a young college man and his mother. We overheard him talking about his finals in college and normal talk. Then the manager came over to interview him. Instead of the mom moving to another table ( it was after the lunch rush), she stayed there and proceeded to answer the questions for him. The young man looked so defeated and his shoulders just kept going south. The manager kept looking at the mom like WTH. The manager ended the interview with a "we have over hired for the summer but I will keep your resume on file". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 :huh: :confused1: I can't believe the manager didn't tell mom to go sit somewhere else while he/she was conducting the interview. I have conducted many interviews in my day, and none of them ever included the candidate's mom. Somebody give that woman some scissors so she can cut those apron strings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Wow. That poor young man!!! I can only imagine his conversation with his mom in the car on the way home... if she ever let him get a word in edgewise! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted May 23, 2013 Author Share Posted May 23, 2013 :huh: :confused1: I can't believe the manager didn't tell mom to go sit somewhere else while he/she was conducting the interview. I have conducted many interviews in my day, and none of them ever included the candidate's mom. Somebody give that woman some scissors so she can cut those apron strings. His face looked like he couldn't believe it. The young man started off standing tall and confident. I don't think he knew his mom would do this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 :svengo: helicopter much? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 The manager ended the interview with a "we have over hired for the summer but I will keep your resume on file". Did the mother hand in a resume? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 His face looked like he couldn't believe it. The young man started off standing tall and confident. I don't think he knew his mom would do this. While I think the young man should have spoken up, he probably didn't want to be disrespectful to his mom (and who knows what dynamic is going on there). But the manager sets the parameters for the interview. It would have been easy for him to tell the mom that he needed to conduct the interview 1:1. I think he's more to blame than the young man in this situation. What's the point of conducting an interview when the person you are evaluating isn't the one answering the questions? How absurd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I wish the manager would have helped the kid out! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsheresomewhere Posted May 23, 2013 Author Share Posted May 23, 2013 Did the mother hand in a resume? It was on the table. I wondered if she filled it out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I was prepared to laugh at this post, but it's just sad. That mother failed her child in a lot of ways. I'm amazed it started that way and that the young man let it continue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Poor guy :( (Also, Lord help me not to act like that!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 It was on the table. I wondered if she filled it out. I meant, it sounded like it should have been her to apply for herself! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momofkhm Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 I feel badly for this young man. We had a different experience. DD took an application in to a bakery and dh went with her. He went inside the bakery. All she did was hand in the application, not an interview. As soon as the person noticed dh was with her - wer're sorry you aren't mature enough for this job if your dad had to come. DH piped up with "she isn't old enough to drive by herself yet, I had to come." (She was a month away from 16.) Let's see, could it be that dh wanted to buy some goodies to come home with? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Cut the cord already. Seriously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mandymom Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 My dh owns a business where he hires mostly teens and young adults. You would be surprised. Unfortunately, I'm not surprised anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilaclady Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 This reminds me of an episode in everybody loves Raymond when Marie went to the job interview with Roberts. Maybe the mom was trying to sabotage the guy and not let him get the job. The guy needs to grow up and kindly tell his mom to leave when the manager got there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momacacia Posted May 23, 2013 Share Posted May 23, 2013 Oh, man! She is gonna be a rockin' MIL!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Florida Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 My daughter went to a theme park audition a couple of months ago and was blown away to encounter a whole bench full of moms of other auditioners sitting together and chatting about their little darlings. My daughter is 18 but doesn't drive yet. So, I was sitting in the car waiting for her, and she texted me absolutely incredulous. I had quit walking her into auditions by the time she was about 14, figuring if she was mature enough to try out for the show she should be grown up enough to handle the audition. The minimum age for this latest one was 16, and yet there were all those moms . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truscifi Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Poor kid. :confused1: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Whoa. I have heard of these things happening. Please someone send out a PSA to crazy parents like this. If you don't want your kid living in your basement until he's a grandpa, don't act like this! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 And here I am telling my 6yo to go talk to her teacher about a grading mistake etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Whoa. I have heard of these things happening. Please someone send out a PSA to crazy parents like this. If you don't want your kid living in your basement until he's a grandpa, don't act like this! That assumes he is able to find anyone to reproduce with or convince an adoption agency he is a suitable parent. Both seem unlikely with mama running that level of interference. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 wow, at least I knew enough to sit in the car when my 14 yr old had his job interview, even with his extra issues I didn't go inside during the interview (Though I did take his picture outside as soon as it was over to document his first interview in the scrapbook lol) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippen Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I feel badly for this young man. We had a different experience. DD took an application in to a bakery and dh went with her. He went inside the bakery. All she did was hand in the application, not an interview. As soon as the person noticed dh was with her - wer're sorry you aren't mature enough for this job if your dad had to come. DH piped up with "she isn't old enough to drive by herself yet, I had to come." (She was a month away from 16.) Let's see, could it be that dh wanted to buy some goodies to come home with? Honestly, I'm not surprised that Dad's presence when daughter was turning in an application was seen as red flag. From your perspective it seemed convenient for him to pick up some goodies since he was already there. From the viewpoint of an employer, however, having Dad along likely signaled that she wasn't ready to handle it on her own. IMO, unless the kiddos are working for mom and dad, it's time for the parental units to put on the coaches caps and stay off the playing field. When older kids/teens are moving off into the work place, or interacting with other decision-making adults (auditions, judging, etc) I think it's important to help them to think through how they intend to present themselves and how that presentation could help or hinder what they're hoping to accomplish. When my daughter is preparing for an audition, we talk through the details of her outfit and hair style in advance. When my son was doing his first work interviews we talked through appropriate clothing and what kinds of questions to expect, then discussed the interviews when he got home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JuanitaL Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Did you notice if she took him to the ladies room with her? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I'm surprised the manager didn't say something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Mousie Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I don't know why the young man didn't get himself to the interview in the first place. If he's in college, he ought to be able, if not to drive, then to take a bus, ride a bike, whatever. He should have been mature enough to foresee and plan for the before and after as well as the during. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I don't know why the young man didn't get himself to the interview in the first place. If he's in college, he ought to be able, if not to drive, then to take a bus, ride a bike, whatever. He should have been mature enough to foresee and plan for the before and after as well as the during. I don't know about the OP but there is no public transportation where I live. Stores are too far away for bike riding and there are no safe roads that have bike lanes or even sidewalks. It's not easy to get around without your own car and you're dependent on other people. That woman was definitely in the wrong, but I don't think how he got to the interview was the problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Florida Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I don't know why the young man didn't get himself to the interview in the first place. If he's in college, he ought to be able, if not to drive, then to take a bus, ride a bike, whatever. He should have been mature enough to foresee and plan for the before and after as well as the during. I don't know about the OP but there is no public transportation where I live. Stores are too far away for bike riding and there are no safe roads that have bike lanes or even sidewalks. It's not easy to get around without your own car and you're dependent on other people. That woman was definitely in the wrong, but I don't think how he got to the interview was the problem. Yes, our area is very spread out, while bus service is limited and weather means riding a bike is often not practical (if one wishes to arrive at one's destination in condition presentable for an interview). Our solution is that, until our kids have a license and their own transportation, I drive them. However, I do not go into the building with them for interviews, auditions or to assist while they are working. I drop off and then run errands, go wait at home if that makes sense, take the dog for a walk at a nearby park or sometimes just nap in the car. What I don't do is hover and supervise and get involved in the process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swellmomma Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I don't know about the OP but there is no public transportation where I live. Stores are too far away for bike riding and there are no safe roads that have bike lanes or even sidewalks. It's not easy to get around without your own car and you're dependent on other people. That woman was definitely in the wrong, but I don't think how he got to the interview was the problem. That's like here, we live in a small village, everyone must travel to another town/city to work, no public transport until you hit the big city 2 hours away. EVen if the kids knew how to drive until they own their own vehicle I will be driving them because I need to have my own car available to me and not sitting in the parking lot at their work. That said it doesn't matter how he got there, it's that his mom attempted to do the interview for him. No boss cares how the person gets there as long as they are on time and mature enough to do the work. If mommy has to do your interview for you, you are seen as not mature enough for the job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venia Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Poor guy. I bet he would have been hired on the spot should have spoken up to his mom though (in a polite, but authoritative manner). I know it is easier said than done, though. Reminds me of the few undergraduate courses I taught. I was shocked how many phone calls I received from parents about their "snowflake's" poor scores. I was even more shocked when I spoke to the student after and learned that they had ASKED their parent to call for them. :ohmy: After a few semesters worth, I ended up adding a very small lecture to my introductory class on how beneficial it is for students to take charge of their education and their lives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wheres Toto Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 I drove my oldest to drop off applications recently. While she does drive, she was going into areas near her school that she's unfamiliar with and hasn't driven before so I pointed out some of the trickier places as we went so she could go back for any interviews by herself. She went into all stores by herself to drop off the applications, talk to the managers, etc. She ended up with two interviews, one "we'll definitely be calling you", and actually has a job already. I will say, this was her first time filling out applications since her last job was at her dance studio and I felt like she was asking me questions every five seconds (she did a lot of them online). :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Reminds me of the few undergraduate courses I taught. I was shocked how many phone calls I received from parents about their "snowflake's" poor scores. I was even more shocked when I spoke to the student after and learned that they had ASKED their parent to call for them. :ohmy: After a few semesters worth, I ended up adding a very small lecture to my introductory class on how beneficial it is for students to take charge of their education and their lives. When I was in undergrad, my parents, siblings and I were all attending the same small regional campus of a university. We often had the same profs but for different classes. There were times when the profs would "take the opportunity" to speak to my parents about their college-aged children's issues. All of us - parents and children - were offended by this. My mom's response was "if you have something to say to my son, speak to my son." :/ My dad was too nice to do more than smile and nod. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Marginally related to this, my son just got a job at the hospital I work for, in the same department, but on a different shift. I went out of my way to stay completely neutral and not be "the mommy" regarding my son's application process and interview. I didn't even mention to management he was applying. He was interviewed by my supervisor and other management that I work with. It was all professional right up until the point when the director of the department handed my son his card and said, "If you have any questions, please call me...or just ask your mom!" DS said he about cracked up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoobie Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Imagine the poor guy on a date! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sewingmama Posted May 25, 2013 Share Posted May 25, 2013 My kids don't have to worry about that with me. I hated going to my own interviews....I'm definitely not going to theirs. Lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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