Lux Et Veritas Academy Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I am not kidding- my daughter turns 14 this week....I am in a panic, she is a great girl...I know her friends are starting to show interest, she hangs with good girls (from public school, so I believe the interest is quicker than homeschoolers)...but I dread the day.......can't she stay young forever;) Homeschool has kept her young and pure...How much longer do I have.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My oldest, ds14 1/2, has yet to express interest, whether to me or in what he searches on the net. I like the fact that he still has "boy" interests - like legos, video games, dinosaurs, baseball, karate. Girls hasn't even made the list yet. My friend's son, who has been taking a couple classes at the jr.high, commented on how there is a great divide in jr. high between those who discovered girls and those who can't be bothered yet. As of now, he is in the "can't be bothered" camp. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gretchen in NJ Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 For a mother to a dd10 and dd8, this was great to hear. :001_smile: I was afraid to click on this thread in fear that someones 8 year old was interested. So, I have to at least 14 1/2. That is good to know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My kids are still little--although both of them picked out boys to marry when they were about 4. But I know that I got interested in boys around 11, in 6th grade. I would have died rather than admit it to anyone (including my mom), though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Ds 15 claims to have always been interested but felt like he had to hide it. ds13--not at all. Claims to want to live and die a bachelor. Ds11 was "engaged" at age 4 or so and held to that until a couple years ago. Hasn't expressed any interest recently. Ds9 has a crush and came to ask us for advice on how to talk to her, LOL! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Has been in full blown puberty for about 6-12 mths but doesn't seem too interested in girls yet. Thank goodness! He is a swimmer and spends 3 hours every day with athletic girls in swim suits, even so, I haven't seen him even take a second look as they walked by. I hope this lasts a little while longer! Tap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Now I know that for my oldest son at least, 16 seemed to be the magical age where he became very clean, good-smelling, and cared what a certain young lady at church thought about him. I'm comfortable with 16 as a reasonable age for that "awakening", and there's another factor to consider... That innocence doesn't necessarily go away when the interest appears. My ds and this sweet girl are on the same page, in terms of not becoming openly or overly involved at this young age. They are clearly "sweet" on each other, but think they're hiding it well (or at least trying), though they clearly think the other hung the moon! What I'm saying is that the innocence can continue even after the interest shows up. I'm pretty sure that if things continue as they have been (both kids are 17 now) that they will wait several more years before they openly express any intention of romantic involvement. My ds 15 1/2, on the other hand, is still not there. He's a bit "younger" in personality than his older brother. I predict that he'll be about 16 1/2 when he hits that milestone! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle T Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 and is interested in girls, but not in a full-blown, s#xual or romantic way. But he notices and comments on pretty girls, he talks about a girl in our homeschool group that he likes, he is definitely more intrigued by kissing or such in movies/TV (not that he gets to see anything graphic). I remember being around the same age, and having crushes on boys. I miss the days when DS wanted to play with action figures and thought girls were gross. Michelle T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkInTheBlue Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Has been in full blown puberty for about 6-12 mths Tap I'm really hoping this isn't an extremely dumb question, but...my oldest boy is 12 (this past May), so I'm learning as I go. Anyway, what qualifies as "full blown puberty"? What does that mean? How will I know we are in "full blown puberty"? I'm a bit panicked thinking "what if he's started this and I don't know it? What will he do when he does?". Duh! Sorry, goofy Mom who has always been such a girlie-girl and really winging it as I go! LOL :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kris Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I am not kidding- my daughter turns 14 this week....I am in a panic, she is a great girl...I know her friends are starting to show interest, she hangs with good girls...but I dread the day.......can't she stay young forever;) Homeschool has kept her young and pure...How much longer do I have.... Mine still isn't interested! I don't know how, why, or how long it will last, but I'm thankful for every day it stays that way! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarah CB Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I'm really hoping this isn't an extremely dumb question, but...my oldest boy is 12 (this past May), so I'm learning as I go. Anyway, what qualifies as "full blown puberty"? What does that mean? How will I know we are in "full blown puberty"? I'm a bit panicked thinking "what if he's started this and I don't know it? What will he do when he does?". Duh! Sorry, goofy Mom who has always been such a girlie-girl and really winging it as I go! LOL :D Don't ask. Just don't ask. In fact, I'm sticking my fingers in my ears right now. La, la, la, la - I can't hear you! I have three boys and my oldest is 8. There is NO such thing as full blown puberty. In fact, there is no such thing as puberty at all. One day they will wake up with a deep voice and a need to shave but that IS IT...Ok?? I mean it. Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh! (running away) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Atl Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Dd12 has really begun to notice boys much more this year. But she still likes to just look from afar and really has no interest in taking this awareness past just admiring them. Dd7 thinks some are cute, but most are yucky. What's refreshing is that I have not sheltered my girls, and still they are in no hurry to act out adult behaviors. Says a lot about peer pressure don't it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kat19 Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 DS 13 doesn't show any interest at all. DD 11 still thinks boys are stinky and dumb~ :001_smile: So hopefully I still have awhile :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereks mom Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 ER has *always* liked girls. But it didn't become *really* obvious until he was about 12 or 13. EK vacillated in her opinion of boys until around age 11, when she decided that they are pretty cool. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jill- OK Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 That innocence doesn't necessarily go away when the interest appears. I think it's fine if your children really and truly aren't interested...but I'm like the poster who was interested early, and would NEVER have discussed it with my parents, lol. (They figured it out eventually...but it still wasn't something they openly discussed with me.) "Interest" doesn't have to mean anything but...well, interest. I don't attach a dread or 'bad' connotation to my kids being 'interested' in the opposite sex; it's natural. Pursuing/acting on that interest, or an age-inappropriate adoption of the adult ramifications of that interest are what I try to guard against, and teach them about. (JMO.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommylawyer Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Does 5 count? LOL! Just kidding! My dd1, who is 5, saw Narnia: Prince Caspian a couple of weeks ago and keeps talking about "the prince." I'm glad to read that for some of you it's not until 15 or 16. (When I was a young teen, I only wanted to be kissed - I didn't even consider anything beyond that.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 All of my kids-since preschool. No joke. They haven't gone through any "yuck" phases either. Buuuut, my niece is 19, and while she likes to oggle the boys, and occasionally go out on a "date", she is more concerned w/ school and a future career. Sooo, just keep telling her how important school is and maybe, just maybe, she won't go boy crazy! (You can dream anyway!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkInTheBlue Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Don't ask. Just don't ask. In fact, I'm sticking my fingers in my ears right now. La, la, la, la - I can't hear you! I have three boys and my oldest is 8. There is NO such thing as full blown puberty. In fact, there is no such thing as puberty at all. One day they will wake up with a deep voice and a need to shave but that IS IT...Ok?? I mean it. Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh! (running away) I absolutely am with you on this! Matter fact I'm in denial that my guys will ever develop the deep voice or need to shave! Not my sweet little guys. I feel like the protective Daddy of a girl. I do not want my guys to get interested in silly girls. I've been one before and been around those silly ones. I know what they are up to and if they break my little boys hearts I'm going to have to go crazy on them! LOL Just stay home with Mom and I'll protect you. (Don't I wish!) Well, I survived them learning how to walk, talk, read, potty and all those other steps that are just processes of them up and leaving me one day. I suppose we'll make it through these too. I do still want to know though for anybody who can tell me; what would "full blown puberty" look like in boys? They are going to go crazy all the sudden are they?:001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela H in Texas Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My dd is 15 and not interested and has expressed a distinct disinterest. She talks about a calling to singleness. My ds is 13 and started having an interest at 12. Two little girls have caught his eye though I think he's down to just one now. Kids are so different. I think it's hormones, interests otherwise, beliefs, and just plain "something." I'd rather my kids be 21 before having any interest and even then maybe wait a few years...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I'm really hoping this isn't an extremely dumb question, but...my oldest boy is 12 (this past May), so I'm learning as I go. Anyway, what qualifies as "full blown puberty"? What does that mean? How will I know we are in "full blown puberty"? I'm a bit panicked thinking "what if he's started this and I don't know it? What will he do when he does?". Duh! Sorry, goofy Mom who has always been such a girlie-girl and really winging it as I go! LOL :D I pm'd you :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenschooler Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Oh, they're so different. With dd16, she wanted to be every Disney princess and fall in love since about age 5. Actually, when she was 5, she had a little friend from Australia who had the same birthday as her, and she *kissed* him at the water fountain in Sunday School (I'm pretty sure she cornered the poor boy!) Age 5. I should have known then what I was in for. Dd13 thinks they're only good for playing basketball. She hasn't shown any romantic inclinations whatsoever so far. One boy at our co-op obviously likes her, because every week as we were leaving, he'd say, "I like your t-shirt." Finally, she told him, "You already told me that!" and she told me he was annoying. Night and Day, that's what I've got. Dd9 doesn't even acknowledge boys exist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Katia Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I have a 16yo and 19yo here and neither one is interested in the opposite gender yet. Amazing to me, but they just....aren't. Too busy with their own pursuits. Or, perhaps they just haven't met anyone they like. Pickin's are pretty slim in these here parts. Once dd goes off to college in the fall.......maybe! Both know I have no problem with them showing interest so that's not it. It's not occurred around here yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I think it's fine if your children really and truly aren't interested...but I'm like the poster who was interested early, and would NEVER have discussed it with my parents, lol. (They figured it out eventually...but it still wasn't something they openly discussed with me.) "Interest" doesn't have to mean anything but...well, interest. I don't attach a dread or 'bad' connotation to my kids being 'interested' in the opposite sex; it's natural. Pursuing/acting on that interest, or an age-inappropriate adoption of the adult ramifications of that interest are what I try to guard against, and teach them about. (JMO.) I would agree. IMO most kids would go through a phase where it's just...interest. A crush, but not necessarily knowing what-all to do with it and maybe not wanting to pursue it. That doesn't even mean wanting to kiss, maybe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kate CA Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 That innocence doesn't necessarily go away when the interest appears. (...)What I'm saying is that the innocence can continue even after the interest shows up. I'm pretty sure that if things continue as they have been (both kids are 17 now) that they will wait several more years before they openly express any intention of romantic involvement. I really agree with this. In our church this is certainly true. I really think something that is very key is being open and honest with your dc about these feelings and about the role they have in our lives. Not only that, but the time and place they should be acted upon. It is very possible to have children who are self-controlled in this area. Hormones don't *have* to drive a young person any more than they have to drive an older one. We make choices and our children can be taught to make them too. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom to Aly Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 dd9 has been aware of them since she was about 5 or 6, mostly because they have always followed her around. When she was 8 they had to make a rule of no boyfriends or kissing at our co-op because the boys (aged 6-11) were fighting over who could be her boyfriend and trying to kiss her. She is really pretty, and she liked the attention a bit at first, then didn't at all--so I can't tell now. I know I was boy crazy from 9 on, so I'm waiting to see, but she is much more level headed and mature than I ever was, so I'm hoping.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy in Orlando Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My boys are all so different. My oldest has been interested and "serious friends" with a girl he's known since he was about 8 for the past three years. But, she lives a good distance from us and I think for both of them it's a "safe" way to have a girlfriend/boyfriend. They son't see a lot of each other. I don't mind too much because we know the family well and share similar values. My "next oldest" (by two minutes) is a girl magnet. Girls of all ages (1-90) LOVE him. He's oblivioius. I know he notices girls, but he is just nice to everyone and seems happy with that. His twin, two minutes younger, is too involved with his reading and learning magic and is NOT interested right now. My youngest is 8 and he still thinks I'm the only girl for him. 8) They're all so different and you have to accept each one as it comes. Scary as that is. I've found (especially with my oldest) that they WANT some direction and guidance. I've found this fact comforting as they get older. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I have three. DS didn't dispaly interest until he went away to college and didn't have a girlfriend until he was past 17.5. DD 14 (almost 15) has specifically repeated about ten times a day how she doesn't want to get married and lately it has changed she can get married but she won't have marital relations ever. Now she has not had any problems with boys yet I think mainly because she gives off negative vibes to them. I don't know how much longer that protection will last. She is beautiful with long golden wavy hair, lithe athletic yet slightly curvy body, and unlike many other girls, she tends to wear clothes that flatter her mainly because most clothes look like they were designed for her frame (5'4, 102 lbs). In youth group and in homeschool co-op, her social phobic behavior has saved her from unwanted attention. Dd 11.5 is the one we most have to worry about. She is a social butterfly who has been hurt by not having as much social interaction as she needs. SHe is very sad that her one age peer in Sunday School is moving this week to Ohio. She doesn't talk about cute boys or anything but isn't anti-marriage like her sister. One thing I noticed with both my kids and what my dh and I discussed, more intelligent kids tend to more secretive about the opposite sex and also later in actually doing anything about it. None of my girls nor myself had any teeny bopper type of crushes. If we liked anyone, it tended to be much older actors or musicians and not in a gushy sort of way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kris Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I'm really hoping this isn't an extremely dumb question, but...my oldest boy is 12 (this past May), so I'm learning as I go. Anyway, what qualifies as "full blown puberty"? What does that mean? How will I know we are in "full blown puberty"? I'm a bit panicked thinking "what if he's started this and I don't know it? What will he do when he does?". Duh! Sorry, goofy Mom who has always been such a girlie-girl and really winging it as I go! LOL :D Don't worry -- when it arrives, you won't have to ask! :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I'm really hoping this isn't an extremely dumb question, but...my oldest boy is 12 (this past May), so I'm learning as I go. Anyway, what qualifies as "full blown puberty"? What does that mean? How will I know we are in "full blown puberty"? I'm a bit panicked thinking "what if he's started this and I don't know it? What will he do when he does?". Duh! Sorry, goofy Mom who has always been such a girlie-girl and really winging it as I go! LOL :D at this household what full grown puberty involves is a sudden growth spurt, voice getting deeper, having to shave every 2 days, and stinking. haven't noticed my 14 year old showing much interest in girls. in face he seems to avoid them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fivetails Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My dd11 hasn't yet shown interest in any in-real-life boys - but she's "totally in love" with Joe Jonas of the Jonas Brothers musical group. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bee Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Or so she says. 6 yo dd on the other hand finds boys much more fun than girls.She usually gravitates toward the boys wherever she goes if they show the slightest interest in playing with her.Both girls went through a period of time where they put pictures on their wall by their beds of their favorite teenage stars.Oldest dd's were a mix of girls and boys,youngest dd's were all boys.Her favorite was Drake Bell because "he plays a guitar". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I did not read all the replies, but I had to laugh when I picked my son up from the 4H Electric Camp bus a couple of weeks ago. As we were getting him gathered up a very cute girl who is taller than him by a head at least came up to him and it was so obvious that she was crushing on him. Now he has not really embraced the whole teen thing yet, still more kid than teenager. He was clueless. She was like "Hey, where are you going to school in the fall? Do you think I will get to see you? Are you going to be in Honor Club? Will you be at the fair? Will I see you there?" And he just looked mighty confused as to why she was asking all this! As we walked away I asked "So who is your new friend?" and he just shrugged and said "I don't know who she is. She just kept talking to me!!" Clueless, I am tellin' ya. The boy was clueless!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Only me Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 She was homeschooled through 8th, went to public school freshman year and private school sophomore year. She has shown no real interest in boys. She says that the boys in her class are so immature :) Right now she would rather focus on getting good grades and dancing then trying to find a boyfriend. I'm sure she thinks that a few of the boys are cute but that's the extent of it and I'm fine with that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Virginia Dawn Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 In all honesty, my daughter began showing an interest in boys very young. I attribute it to the fact that we lived in suburbia and she went to public school kindergarten, even the little girls at church were into boy talk. It practically drove me to despair. I dealt with it the best I could by talking and talking about age appropriateness and God's guidelines for our lives, but most of it fell on deaf ears. She ended up a single mother at 19. My two older sons have been very different. My oldest ds began expressing an interest at 16 and at 17 has a girlfriend. But having seen what his sister went through, and being of a more serious and sedate turn of mind, he has already told me not to worry about him doing anything foolish. His girlfriend is a very sweet girl, I just wish she would dress a little more modestly. My 14yo ds is too embarrassed by girls to express any interest at present. One waved at him from a car the other day and he was clueless. He's also something of a prude, lol. My 9yo son is my worry. He is in a Bible class full of little girls and what is the main topic of conversation? Who likes who. He started talking like that and I tried to play it down as much as possible. Then he got into social hot water and was being ostracized because he was having a little too much fun with all the nonsense talk. That was actually a good thing, because it led us to have another discussion about age appropriate behavior and conversation that followed God's command to treat others the way we want to be treated. We have family guidelines for dating- group dates allowed at 16, avoiding dates alone- especially at night- until after high school graduation, dating is a privilege that can be taken away for poor school work or blatant disrespect, curfew of 11, you finance your own dates- we do not, lots of talk about the purpose of dating and where it could lead and how hearts can be hurt on both sides. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renee in NC Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My 15yo ds showed interest at 11 - when he started "full blown puberty." My 10yo ds already has his future wife picked out - they plan to move to FL and spend their lives fishing together! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Florida Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My daughter is 13, and she's had a couple of minor crushes, but she also has a very clear vision of where she wants her life to go and seems to understand how a romantic entanglement might derail those plans. It's interesting, because we're neither Christian nor particularly conservative, but--having caused a certain amount of chaos in my own teen years with this sort of thing--I've talked with her about the unnecessary upheaval dating too early can cause. And she seems quite comfortable with just not putting her toes in that water until she's mature enough to handle it all. In other words, until she's actually in a position to be looking for a mate, why date? Again, it's not like she doesn't notice boys. She does. And she's told me about the two she's found interesting. (And her taste is not bad, by the way.) But she keeps it all theorhetical. I was nervous about what changes might occur once the hormones kicked in, but the puberty fairy has arrived, and nothing about her attitude seems to have changed. So, we'll just have to see where it goes from here, I guess. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 This is an interesting thread. . . on two points. DS1 (16) has been mentioning this girl or that girl is "pretty". Wouldn't say it's an "interest" as yet. DS2 (13) gawks. (He's always been a "gawker" though, poor kid needs to learn to keep his mouth closed!) However, the idea of talking to girls terrifies him, so again no "interest". DS3 (6) he "loves" girls. This will be a problem, as he's terribly cute and girls tend to love him right back. Thankfully, he's still "all boy" (read "pest"). Additionally, he's VERY tall for his age. . .so the girls who are interested quickly back down once they discover how young he is. DS4 (5) inherited his Daddy's love of cars. I'll know he's interested in girls when he starts speaking of their "fine lines" and "curves". As to "full blown puberty". . .Can't say I've experienced such a thing. (sound instananeous) It was very gradual here. Didn't even notice the voice change till I called home one day and mistakenly thought I was talking to DH. (no voice cracking here) DS1 has a beard some men have felt free to inform me they'd be envious of (then proceed to inform me I should introduce him to a razor). . .I seem to recall the "stink" coming first. . . Of course, in my opinion, the attitude is the worst of the lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConnieinCO Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My dd is 14 1/2 and is now deciding some boys are cute but I'm not seeing a whole lot of time or attention given to those matters just yet. It helps that most of her friends don't either. Connie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crazycoffeechic Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My ds is 13, notices girls now, when he is with dh, ds will say something to him about them (or the other way around:glare:) he will say something to me if he really notices her.:) Other than that, he pretty much says nothing. He has been going through puberty for almost a year now, it is so funny! He has a "stache" now! He doesn't squeak as much as he used to when he talks.:D It seems like everytime he goes to his dads house for a couple of weeks, he grows 2 inches! It is so cool watching him grow into this handsome young man! We moved last year, I told ds that when we moved back, nobody is going to know who he is and when they finally do, the girls are going to say "dang!":lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kuovonne Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Does 5 count? LOL! Just kidding! My dd1, who is 5, saw Narnia: Prince Caspian a couple of weeks ago and keeps talking about "the prince." That's my DD who is also 5. She goes into spasims of giggles at the mention of any boy who is "handsome" and not "too old" or "too young". Boys from books, movies, neighbor boys, boys seen on stage, etc. She can't explain why some boys make her giggly, but she is very consistant in who tickles her fancy. So far most of the "boys" are fictional and she is too shy to talk to boys that aren't already good playmates, thank goodness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Academy of Jedi Arts Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Dd7 likes Zack Efron:D 4th/5th grade here is when they start passing little notes and having "boyfriends". There are a handful of boys dd thinks are cute and nice- possible dating material for the future but she says she is not going to kiss a boy until she's 13. A boy carried her dance bag and gave her a piggy back ride to class once, and I had to really hold myself back from laughing. On the serious side though, there are middle school kids here having "oral" on the school bus, so I have frank discussions with dd. We talk about the fact a boyfriend is a friend first and a good friend doesn't try to pressure another friend into things. She knows that teen boys will say or do just about anything to get a girl to experiment, and that the girls who usually succumb to the pressure are the ones who don't have a good self-image. My rule for when dd is older is no dating without a chaperone until she's 16. However, I want her to know she can come to me at any time and I will get her anything she needs without judgment or lecture. I have seen way too many pregnant teens whose mothers told them they were "too young to be thinking about sex." A lot of these teens would have used birth control or maybe weren't even ready to have sex but wanted to be protected JIC and the mother's attitude sent them over the edge. I went on the pill when I went off to college at 16, but did not have my first experience until I was close to 18. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jill- OK Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I would agree. IMO most kids would go through a phase where it's just...interest. A crush, but not necessarily knowing what-all to do with it and maybe not wanting to pursue it. That doesn't even mean wanting to kiss, maybe. I also forgot to mention that just because a kid shows 'interest', it doesn't mean you've entered into some scary stage of life; they can admire from afar without wanting to 'do' anything about it, and they can also revert to not being interested again for a while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 Or so she says.6 yo dd on the other hand finds boys much more fun than girls.She usually gravitates toward the boys wherever she goes if they show the slightest interest in playing with her.Both girls went through a period of time where they put pictures on their wall by their beds of their favorite teenage stars.Oldest dd's were a mix of girls and boys,youngest dd's were all boys.Her favorite was Drake Bell because "he plays a guitar". I always hung out with the guys as well. Even in high school I had more guy friends than girl friends. If there are two groups I still will gravitate towards talking with the guys, I'm much more comfortable with them for some reason. Now I am the only female in my household and thats all right with me. I get to be the queen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crazycoffeechic Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 I would agree. IMO most kids would go through a phase where it's just...interest. A crush, but not necessarily knowing what-all to do with it and maybe not wanting to pursue it. That doesn't even mean wanting to kiss, maybe. I also forgot to mention that just because a kid shows 'interest', it doesn't mean you've entered into some scary stage of life; they can admire from afar without wanting to 'do' anything about it, and they can also revert to not being interested again for a while. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRAAB Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 My oldest dd didn't show an interest until maybe 17, 18. But her younger sister, oh my goodness. Way too young. She's always been homeschooled, all her friends were homeschooled, I watched what she read and viewed, and still. Boy crazy. She's almost 17 and is in love. I'm so in over my head with this kid. I have to think it was just in her because her sister never exhibited this kind of attraction to the opposite sex. Janet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sasharowan Posted July 8, 2008 Share Posted July 8, 2008 ds12 has no interest in girls and kissing in movies will turn him off the movie faster than anything else. dd8 (almost 9) has mentioned that this guy or that guy is cute and has crushes on tv stars. She just started this year. ds7 has been interested in girls since he realized that there are 2 genders. He constantly points out to dad women he thinks is cute and likes several preteen girls (that make a fuss over how cute he is). ds2 has no clue yet. So it is different for all of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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