Dear Person With a Screaming Toddler...

[sparrow]

Well personally, I think the rudest thing is for people who weren't even at the recital to say mean things about the woman and her child. It's one thing for the OP to vent, and it's one thing for people to sympathize with her, but it's totally different to go off about "those parents" and how she should have been kicked out, or how she doesn't deserve a defense.

 

But she does deserve a defense. I have no reason to doubt that the OP was telling us the truth about how things happened... but she was emotional, and of course she can only tell her side. There are two sides to every story. The OP is probably the one who is right here and the mom of the toddler is probably a deserving of the things people have said here... but we don't know because we can't ask the other mom.

 

If people had just limited the conversation to sympathizing with the OP it wouldn't have bothered me - she deserves sympathy, her daughter's recital was ruined. It's a totally different thing to disparage a stranger on a public forum where she can't defend herself. JMHO :)

 

Really?:confused: You're that concerned this unknown child was called an obnoxious brat and that people have said that it is common courtesy to remove a screaming child from a performance? I'll bet the same scenario played out at hundreds of recitals and performances yesterday. Shhhh. They'll never know we were talking about their rudeness.

 

I'd hate for you to hear the names I call the neighbor boys in the privacy of my own living room :lol:.

[kwickimom]

I am totally with the OP on this one. This person was plain rude and should have left with the kid. It was rude of her to stay and leave him scream and the person in charge should have asked her to leave. Its common courtesy. Too bad if she missed her kid because her other kid was screaming, there are some things you will miss when you have more than one kid. Fact of life. She could've at least tried to take the kid out and clam him down and just come back to see her other kid.

 

I would have been mad if my kids recital was ruined because of some other mother not taking care of their child.

[Dobela]

Well personally, I think the rudest thing is for people who weren't even at the recital to say mean things about the woman and her child. It's one thing for the OP to vent, and it's one thing for people to sympathize with her, but it's totally different to go off about "those parents" and how she should have been kicked out, or how she doesn't deserve a defense.

 

But she does deserve a defense. I have no reason to doubt that the OP was telling us the truth about how things happened... but she was emotional, and of course she can only tell her side. There are two sides to every story. The OP is probably the one who is right here and the mom of the toddler is probably a deserving of the things people have said here... but we don't know because we can't ask the other mom.

 

If people had just limited the conversation to sympathizing with the OP it wouldn't have bothered me - she deserves sympathy, her daughter's recital was ruined. It's a totally different thing to disparage a stranger on a public forum where she can't defend herself. JMHO :)

My daughter's recital was last night. She began preparing for this one night *9 MONTHS* ago. She was excited and we were all looking forward to the event. I would have been furious had someone allowed their child to cry during the entire program. One, I have spent several hundred dollars in lessons, more for costumes and attire, paid a $100 recital fee, and spent hours helping my daughter prepare for the event. In the last week as we had more rehearsals, I also spent a small fortune on eating out, gas, and more as the countdown began and rehersals increased. Thanks to pedophiles and idiots, we are not allowed to video the performance ourselves and the DVD of the program was another $50. If I pay $50 for a DVD of the performance, I don't want to hear a child screaming then either. My daughter was only in one class. Some children were in many classes and had up to 8 costume changes. Their parents have invested thousands of dollars and many more hours. They have the right to watch the recital without rude children and adults.

 

OP, The parents showed no respect for the child, the performers, or the audience. And as a result, the child also did not show proper respect for anyone else or the environment. I understand that kids have meltdowns in public places. I have been there, done that. I would not have allowed my child to disrupt a recital performance at any point, and that was even before my daughter began dance. OP, please vent away. Believe me, some of what you have said here is not much different than some of the text messages between a good friend and I after last night. Anonymous venting is always welcome IMO.

[Mommy22alyns]

I am totally with the OP on this one. This person was plain rude and should have left with the kid. It was rude of her to stay and leave him scream and the person in charge should have asked her to leave. Its common courtesy. Too bad if she missed her kid because her other kid was screaming, there are some things you will miss when you have more than one kid. Fact of life. She could've at least tried to take the kid out and clam him down and just come back to see her other kid.

 

I would have been mad if my kids recital was ruined because of some other mother not taking care of their child.

 

I absolutely agree. Sometimes we have to suck it up and miss things to deal appropriately with one of our kids.

[kalanamak]

 

So how's this for honest? I think that people should be considerate of others when attending a performance (jawm). And I am really irked that an inconsiderate person kept me from enjoying a performance that my daughter worked very hard for (jawm). And I'm feeling defensive because folks here have jumped on me for venting about such an obvious lack of manners! (jawm).

 

I jawy.

[kalanamak]

And it may not be right, but disparaging strangers happens often enough on the GB that it shouldn't be a surprise. Stroller lady and crazy food lady come to mind right off. If those threads are going to bother you, you should just back out and not participate. Otherwise you'll spend a great deal of time frustrated.

 

:iagree:

 

No strangers were harmed by this thread. No one logged on and said "OMG, that lady was me, I'll kill myself now."

 

It is human nature to investigate, judge, and act upon our environment. Without that nature there would be no social organization, no modern medicine, no Sistine Chapel. We'd be less than lizards.

 

And no, I'm try to shush you or shame you but I think it important we not sin our blessings.

[kalanamak]

 

I like to think that we classical educators are pursuing virtue in ourselves as well as our kids.

 

A pretty thought, but a projection.

 

The older I get, the more I see the "virtue" of calling a spade a spade. (I will put on the record, that anything smaller than a spade -- a spoon, a trowel -- I let slide entirely without comment (I do note them in case they grow into spades), but a spade deserves to be called a spade.)

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

:iagree: Someone in charge should have asked the woman to leave or made an announcement reminding the audience to turn off cell phones and take crying children outside. These things happen and it doesn't mean the kid is an obnoxious beast, but it is rude and disrespectful behavior for a parent to subject everyone else to a child's tantrum for the entire show for her own benefit (it sure wasn't for the child's benefit that she stayed!). It's not like the child is in a plane and there is nowhere else to go.

 

:iagree:

 

I also always feel so badly for the screaming toddler. They are probably very tired, hungry, bored, etc. A three hour recital is not a venue for a toddler. The parents are in the wrong for not planning ahead for the toddler, or for not taking the toddler away from the rest of the audience. The parents could have returned for their own child's performance. They didn't have to sit there the whole time with a screaming toddler.

[happymomofboys]

A pretty thought, but a projection.

 

The older I get, the more I see the "virtue" of calling a spade a spade. (I will put on the record, that anything smaller than a spade -- a spoon, a trowel -- I let slide entirely without comment (I do note them in case they grow into spades), but a spade deserves to be called a spade.)

 

LOVE THIS! Can I steal it?

[LibraryLover]

I can't understand why a person wouldn't try to comfort a crying child. It is cruel to leave a child to cry for 3 hours without trying to do something.

[SKL]

And how much you wanna bet that toddler's mom doesn't believe in CIO.

 

:leaving:

 

 

I know, that was obnoxious and hideous of me. :D

[TravelingChris]

I had two adhd children out of three. My third was the one who had us going to the nursery every Sunday during church because of her screaming and crying. So I am well familiar with disruptive behavior. I simply didn;t allow it anyway in a public performance or other area that necessitated quiet like museums. I came prepared to distract and my kids were able to attend concerts and shows even when pretty small with no crying or screaming. If there was any problem, out they went. Now if disorganized me with three problem kids could do it, anyone can. Yes, I have a husband but since he is military, I have gone to plenty of performances with just the kids.

 

OP, I get it. You have my support.

[Citrusheights5]

This photo is of my sons 8th grade graduation... Not the award ceremony, which I attended alone so that my DH would be home with the kids, (it was very formal, and by invite only), but his "walking". Yes my three year old started wailing for a cookie... We shushed, but then DH got up and took him out side, leaving me with the other two, who also joined the cookie chant, but quited nicely after be shushed... Do we often give in to their wails.... No... But this was not the place to enforce it... Nor the time to fight the good fight...... Notice the window behind DH... Another awesome dad...

 

Facebook captions say- Love is- watching DS graduate while getting cookie clapped in your hair..

 

After this pic, taken when son was walking off stage... DH went back outside..

 

I'd like you to meet my obnoxious annoying ... Hideous even....brat.. His name is Chris... And he has touched the iPad no less than 40 during the typing of. This message.... The other 5 have outgrown it... But were no less hideous...(thanks for the definition poster) at this Age... I've edited not a word... Because for this post.... I want to be That parent...

[SonshineLearner]

It's actually quite funny if you can step back from it and take it for what it was: a rude mom with a toddler meltdown of epic proportions.

 

Mmmmm.... maybe it's not. To me, when I pay a ton of money for classes and then over $200 for the performance, I can't think of it as funny if I can't properly hear.

[Joanne]

And how much you wanna bet that toddler's mom doesn't believe in CIO.

 

:leaving:

 

 

I know, that was obnoxious and hideous of me. :D

 

Yea, it really is. It's insulting to a lot of people and it represents a gross twisting of what "no cry it out" infant care is.

[clarkacademy]

To the OP I am not sure how classes work for your daughter. In my kids classes they worked all year had a huge performance came back in the fall worked all year for another huge performance! I know some schools do several but some only do one big one each year then break for summer. You may want to talk to the director about posting signs, sending notices ect. for next year.

 

Not too call people out but just be plain that this will not be tolerated type thing. It would worry me that since it was tolerated this year it could happen again with a different kid next year. I am really sorry your dd recital was ruined and I hope she is OK.

[SKL]

Yea, it really is. It's insulting to a lot of people and it represents a gross twisting of what "no cry it out" infant care is.

 

Oh, really. It was a joke. Point being that if you really think it's cruel to let a child cry for a few minutes at night, how can you think it's OK for 3 hours during the day (when everyone else has to hear it too)? Don't we all know someone who thinks that way?

 

Of course I'm nobody to comment on that. I'm the mom who would dicipline my toddler if she tried that nonsense (in the daytime) and wouldn't cut it out darn quick.

Edited June 17, 2012 by SKL

[Joanne]

Oh, really. It was a joke. Point being that if you really think it's cruel to let a child cry for a few minutes at night, how can you think it's OK for 3 hours during the day (when everyone else has to hear it too)? Don't we all know someone who thinks that way?

 

Of course I'm nobody to comment on that. I'm the mom who would dicipline my toddler if she tried that nonsense (in the daytime) and wouldn't cut it out darn quick.

 

Your reply and "joke" are not the situation of the OP.

 

And, no, I don't know anyone who doesn't do CIO and would sit passively allowing a 3 year old to whine for 3 hours of a performance. I also don't connect the 2 at all.

 

I, too, would remove and deal with my toddler almost immediately.

[justLisa]

BLeh and YUCK. NO toddler deserves to be called a hideous obnoxious brat. What would you call an adult capable of calling a toddler that? I have a few words in mind....but *I* refrain from actually using that kind of derrogetory language toward others. It sounds disguisting. I can see calling the kid a few choice things, but that is just a little much.

 

 

I'm quoting my own initial post since it was criticizing your character. I'm sorry and sure you are a nice person, I just cringe when I hear those names directed at babies, because it is NOT their fault.

 

But seriously 3 hours? If that is not an exaggeration that is the most disgusting thing I have heard in a long time. When DD was an infant I could never sit with the family in a restaurant and eat my food without getting up a few times and pacing the floor with DD. It's just what comes with having children. That is what video cameras are for. I have never dealt with melt downs in public, but I cannot imagine remaining in the situation for HOURS:confused::confused:.

Edited June 17, 2012 by 425lisamarie

[jujsky]

I'm really shocked at the number of people reaming out the OP in this thread. Extending grace to this kid? To the kid, yes, but not to the parent. This is a recital, not a situation where the mom of this toddler was stuck in a plane or on a subway. She could get up and leave, or better yet -- get a baby-sitter for her young child who was obviously not old enough to handle sitting through a recital, which can be quite long and loud. When my son was young (4) we left him with my brother during dance recitals because he was too active and the music was two loud for him (sensory issues). He has only been to his sister's last too recitals when he was 7 and 8, and even then we gave him things to keep him quiet and made sure he walked around and got the wiggles out during intermission.

 

It was our recital weekend Friday & Saturday and I volunteered for bake sale during both Saturday performances. I saw several parents of infants and toddlers in the hallway who had come out of the auditorium with either crying children or children who were getting antsy and needed to walk or run around for awhile before sitting through more of the show. I saw some of these parents come out multiple times during the 3+ hour performance. That's what good parents do -- attend to the needs of their children with as little disruption to other people in the theater as possible. OP, you should have been able to watch your DD's solo without a screaming, whining child distracting you and everyone else. It was not the child's fault, but bad parenting at play. I'm sorry the experience was ruined for you. I'm sure your DD worked hard all year and deserved her moment to shine, uninterrupted by rude, inconsiderate people.

Edited June 18, 2012 by jujsky

[Momof3littles]

Your reply and "joke" are not the situation of the OP.

 

And, no, I don't know anyone who doesn't do CIO and would sit passively allowing a 3 year old to whine for 3 hours of a performance. I also don't connect the 2 at all.

 

I, too, would remove and deal with my toddler almost immediately.

:iagree:

 

We just had my 5.5 yo DD's dance recital. We considered getting a sitter, but we have no family available locally, and we just interviewed a few sitters via care.com. We haven't left him yet, and I don't think it would have gone well without DD and DS1 there with him.

 

We decided to take him, but of course with the understanding that if he got upset or loud, we'd take him out. We packed a few non messy snacks, a magnadoodle, etc. We picked seats on an aisle and got him his "own" seat just so we could have an extra buffer if someone was right next to us.

 

I assumed one of us would have to leave with him, perhaps try to come back to see DD's performance if the 2 yo was calm enough, and then leave early.

 

She was #22 in the order of performance, so it was about an hour or an hour and a half before she went on.

 

He shockingly did great, other than saying a few words here and there. No screaming. He did change laps from DH's to mine maybe 2x. He is not one to sit calmly usually, but he was really into the whole thing.

 

No way would I have left him cry and disrupt everyone else, but I do sympathize it can be tough to find a sitter. I'm there right now. It is difficult without family to help, and my close friends are all maxed out and unable to help most of the time. So, we thought we'd see how it worked out.

 

No, I would not let my toddler disrupt an entire performance, and would remove him as quickly as possible, but I do have some sympathy for parents who can't easily find sitters. I know most people think it isn't a big deal, but my kids have not done well with being left before age 2, and after that only did well if their siblings were around for comfort and security.

[SKL]

And, no, I don't know anyone who doesn't do CIO and would sit passively allowing a 3 year old to whine for 3 hours of a performance.

 

Oh well, I do. I mean, people who think their child's need to express himself trumps others' right to enjoy a performance, etc.

 

But you're right, of course we do not know whether the first half of the above quote is true for the mom described in the OP. That's why it was a joke. Smilies, self-deprecation, etc. :chillpill: (I should not further hijack this thread - but if you felt insulted because non-CIO seems misunderstood, be assured that those who CIO feel equally insulted when CIO is misunderstood.)

[Heatherwith4]

A pretty thought, but a projection.

 

The older I get, the more I see the "virtue" of calling a spade a spade. (I will put on the record, that anything smaller than a spade -- a spoon, a trowel -- I let slide entirely without comment (I do note them in case they grow into spades), but a spade deserves to be called a spade.)

:iagree: 100%

[annandatje]

And how much you wanna bet that toddler's mom doesn't believe in CIO.

 

:leaving:

 

 

I know, that was obnoxious and hideous of me. :D

 

 

Based upon the narrative recounted by the original poster, my guess would be that the mother does indeed advocate crying it out. Remember she failed to comfort a whining crying child for three hours.

[4everHis]

Yes but shouldn't people also extend a little bit of respect for those who payed to be there too? I had to leave many things over my older son when he was small. I never would have thought to stay and ruin it for everyone else. Not too mention the ones on stage who worked so hard to be there. What right did this parent have to ruin it for everyone?

 

I have to agree here. It's part of being the adult, having to make stinky choices that are for the benefit of the 'bigger.' I hate it for the parents, I've been that parent, but you need to remove the screaming child.:sad:

[Annie Laurie]

Oh well, I do. I mean, people who think their child's need to express himself trumps others' right to enjoy a performance, etc.

 

But you're right, of course we do not know whether the first half of the above quote is true for the mom described in the OP. That's why it was a joke. Smilies, self-deprecation, etc. :chillpill: (I should not further hijack this thread - but if you felt insulted because non-CIO seems misunderstood, be assured that those who CIO feel equally insulted when CIO is misunderstood.)

 

What does

people who think their child's need to express himself trumps others' right to enjoy a performance, etc.

have to do with CIO or not CIO?

 

When was this ever a CIO or not CIO debate?

Edited June 17, 2012 by Annie Laurie

[I talk to the trees]

Goodness gracious! I didn't mean to create such a kilt-worthy thread! I just needed to vent about a very frustrating, negative experience. (I'm a "bottle-it-up-and-let-off-steam-later" person. I hate, hate, hate confrontations, especially with complete strangers. And I wouldn't have confronted this woman during the recital anyway, because that would have added to the distraction the other parents were already experiencing!) Fwiw, dd handled it better than I did! I asked her if the wailing had bothered her, and she said, "Yeah, but you have to just keep on going. So I did." :)

 

I'm pretty sure some creative sound editing can erase the little stinker from our lives forever! Anyway...thank you for "listening" to me whine, and the commiseration.

 

Now don't go bickering any more! Unless, of course, you'd *like* to turn this into a kilt-photo thread- which I'm not exactly opposed to, as long as it involves David Tennant.;)

[SKL]

What does have to do with CIO or not CIO?

 

When was this ever a CIO or not CIO debate?

 

It wasn't.

 

OK, the OP's vent (and some of the comments) reminded me of a personal pet peeve I have. The attitude some people have that their precious little snowflake must never be asked to do anything she does not want to do - be it sleep (for his own ultimate benefit) or sit quietly (for the benefit of others). Yes, there are people like this whom I know. No, not everyone who didn't CIO is like this.

 

I can't believe so many grown-ups cannot take a joke, instead choosing to take a silly comment (complete with smilies) so personally.

[Joanne]

It wasn't.

 

OK, the OP's vent (and some of the comments) reminded me of a personal pet peeve I have. The attitude some people have that their precious little snowflake must never be asked to do anything she does not want to do - be it sleep (for his own ultimate benefit) or sit quietly (for the benefit of others). Yes, there are people like this whom I know. No, not everyone who didn't CIO is like this.

 

I can't believe so many grown-ups cannot take a joke, instead choosing to take a silly comment (complete with smilies) so personally.

 

Because it wasn't a joke. It was an opportunity you used to assert an agenda. It was a stretch, it didn't fit, and that is what people are reacting to.

[Mothersweets]

I would have been very unhappy too. I'm so sorry. I couldn't stand 15 mins., I can't imagine what it must have been like for you.:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

 

(And people here need to lighten up and let the OP vent. Sheesh. She's not the bad guy here.)

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

 

Oh my goodness, I just realized this is a 130 post count thread! I'll go back and see if I missed anything. I'm hoping everyone's letting the OP vent.

[SKL]

Because it wasn't a joke. It was an opportunity you used to assert an agenda. It was a stretch, it didn't fit, and that is what people are reacting to.

 

OK, look, I think everyone whose kid learned to sleep without CIO is the absolute bomb. I also think everyone whose kid learned to sleep with a short CIO trial is the bomb. I also think everyone who is still doing their best to get their kid to sleep so they can be healthy and happy is the bomb.

 

I do not think people whose kids cry/fuss in public during the day have a right to look down upon people who let their kids cry for a few minutes at night. And I have seen that happening here, and yes, it is a pet peeve of mine.

 

And I have a dry sense of humor which I thought might be shared by other mature adults. But there, I am apparently wrong.

[clarkacademy]

OK, look, I think everyone whose kid learned to sleep without CIO is the absolute bomb. I also think everyone whose kid learned to sleep with a short CIO trial is the bomb. I also think everyone who is still doing their best to get their kid to sleep so they can be healthy and happy is the bomb.

 

I do not think people whose kids cry/fuss in public during the day have a right to look down upon people who let their kids cry for a few minutes at night. And I have seen that happening here, and yes, it is a pet peeve of mine.

 

And I have a dry sense of humor which I thought might be shared by other mature adults. But there, I am apparently wrong.

 

I SHARED :D:D I think your funny as he77:lol:

[Joanne]

OK, look, I think everyone whose kid learned to sleep without CIO is the absolute bomb. I also think everyone whose kid learned to sleep with a short CIO trial is the bomb. I also think everyone who is still doing their best to get their kid to sleep so they can be healthy and happy is the bomb.

 

I do not think people whose kids cry/fuss in public during the day have a right to look down upon people who let their kids cry for a few minutes at night. And I have seen that happening here, and yes, it is a pet peeve of mine.

 

And I have a dry sense of humor which I thought might be shared by other mature adults. But there, I am apparently wrong.

 

Nice p/a insult. Well done.

 

I'm not discussing CIO or non CIO. I simply pointed out that you made a connection that wasn't - and a joke that wasn't.

 

I'm :chillpill:. But that doesn't mean I need to ignore your creating a reason to posit your admitted pet peeve in a thread that has nothing to do with it.

[Annie Laurie]

But that doesn't mean I need to ignore your creating a reason to posit your admitted pet peeve in a thread that has nothing to do with it.

 

Exactly. It comes across like you have a huge chip on your shoulder about the issue and were looking for an opportunity to insert your views on it in a roundabout way and not have to take ownership, just pass it off as a joke. But really, you weren't joking when you wrote your original comment.

 

Maybe you should start a thread about CIO vs no CIO and air your views there, it comes across as passive-aggressive to insert them here.

[SKL]

Nice p/a insult. Well done.

 

I'm not discussing CIO or non CIO. I simply pointed out that you made a connection that wasn't - and a joke that wasn't.

 

I'm :chillpill:. But that doesn't mean I need to ignore your creating a reason to posit your admitted pet peeve in a thread that has nothing to do with it.

 

I'm horrified. I have been caught committing the world's worst forum offense. Since this is definitely a first for the Hive, I don't even know if it will get me banned or not. In any case, I'm sure the Hive will be a safer place now that my joke/connection that wasn't has been called out.

[SKL]

Exactly. It comes across like you have a huge chip on your shoulder about the issue and were looking for an opportunity to insert your views on it in a roundabout way and not have to take ownership, just pass it off as a joke. But really, you weren't joking when you wrote your original comment.

 

Maybe you should start a thread about CIO vs no CIO and air your views there, it comes across as passive-aggressive to insert them here.

 

Actually, if you go back to my original "joke" comment (which was about 10 words long excluding the smilies and "I'm a jerk/that was a joke" language), and then look one post above my comment, you will see the comment that sparked mine. Something about how cruel it is to let a child cry and cry. It happened to remind me of that CIO discussion we had a while back. Specifically, the sub-argument about whether kids who successfully CIO end up crying less in the long run.

 

Didn't you ever make a quip or a play on words just for a little chuckle? Really? Because that's pretty normal in my neck of the woods. So you guys really think there are people who sit around all day looking for a chance to hijack a thread and turn it into a pro-CIO manifesto? I do know how to start a thread myself if I really wanted to discuss that ad nauseum.

 

I think a more interesting discussion would be how people develop (or don't develop) a sense of humor. Even if you think I'm the most obnoxious jerk around, a simple eyeroll would be sufficient, I would think.

 

Then again, I got overly ticked recently about the implication that a single mom who pays a nanny while she works full-time is "privileged." Maybe we're just pushing each other's buttons without realizing it.

 

ETA: I mean, I did realize it could be a little "button," but I thought you guys could tell my intent was good-natured. I guess it's a more sensitive issue than I thought.

Edited June 17, 2012 by SKL

[Annie Laurie]

Actually, if you go back to my original "joke" comment (which was about 10 words long excluding the smilies and "I'm a jerk/that was a joke" language), and then look one post above my comment, you will see the comment that sparked mine. Something about how cruel it is to let a child cry and cry. It happened to remind me of that CIO discussion we had a while back. Specifically, the sub-argument about whether kids who successfully CIO end up crying less in the long run.

 

Didn't you ever make a quip or a play on words just for a little chuckle? Really? Because that's pretty normal in my neck of the woods. So you guys really think there are people who sit around all day looking for a chance to hijack a thread and turn it into a pro-CIO manifesto? I do know how to start a thread myself if I really wanted to discuss that ad nauseum.

 

I think a more interesting discussion would be how people develop (or don't develop) a sense of humor. Even if you think I'm the most obnoxious jerk around, a simple eyeroll would be sufficient, I would think.

 

Then again, I got overly ticked recently about the implication that a single mom who pays a nanny while she works full-time is "privileged." Maybe we're just pushing each other's buttons without realizing it.

 

ETA: I mean, I did realize it could be a little "button," but I thought you guys could tell my intent was good-natured. I guess it's a more sensitive issue than I thought.

 

You said

And how much you wanna bet that toddler's mom doesn't believe in CIO.

 

:leaving:

 

 

I know, that was obnoxious and hideous of me. :D

 

And as soon as you were called on it, simply saying yes, that was hideous and obnoxious and misrepresents what no CIO means, you turned it into a statement about people who don't CIO at night but do during the day. Can't you see how illogical that is? It has nothing to do with the conversation, and yet you keep defending it with more passive-aggressive, sarcastic comments.

 

I don't think you sit around all day looking for opportunities to hijack threads, I think it's something that bothers you that's apparently easily triggered and then comes out in inappropriate ways. I think it's your button that was pushed here and wish you would acknowledge that without continually defending it with passive-aggressive statements about our lack of a sense of humor.

[I talk to the trees]

To lighten the mood, for those times when you CAN'T take out the screaming toddler:

 

TERROR ON FLIGHT 611 - THERE'S BABY ON BOARD

by Dave Barry

 

Recently, my wife and I took our eight-month-old daughter on a trip involving

five plane flights in one week. Many people would be reluctant to travel with a

baby that small, but we had a compelling reason: We have Fig Newtons for brains.

 

An intelligent person, or even a reasonably bright fungus, would know that two

people cannot possibly carry both a baby and all the supplies the baby needs,

including stroller, car seat, clothes, nappies, industrial-sized bale of wipes,

stuffed bear, stuffed tiger, stuffed frog, stuffed paramecium, etc. The total

weight of all these supplies can be hundreds of times the weight of the actual

baby. This is why your famous explorers rarely travelled with babies.

 

If Magellan had tried to sail around the world with a baby on board, his ship

would have sunk at the dock from the weight of the formula alone.

 

We were one of those wretched travelling families you see getting on planes -

the kind where you don't actually see the people, just this mound of baby

equipment shuffling slowly down the aisle toward you. This sight is always

hugely popular with the other passengers, some of whom will yank open the

emergency exits and dive out of the plane. Because they know what babies do on

planes: They stand on their parents' laps and stick their heads up over the

seats, so they can get maximum range when they shriek. On a baby-intensive

airplane, you see shrieking baby heads constantly popping up all over, like

prairie dogs from hell.

 

As a parent in this situation, your fervent hope is that the other babies on

the plane will shriek louder than yours, thereby diverting passenger hatred

away from you. It would not surprise me to learn that some parents creep

under the seats and pinch other people's babies to set them off. I myself

would never do such a thing. I carry a slingshot.

 

The trick for keeping your baby from crying on the plane is to come up with a

new activity each time the baby gets bored. A standard baby gets bored every

15 seconds, so on a four-hour flight, you, as a parent, need to come up with

960 different activities. By the third hour of the flight, your standards are

pretty low. Baby wants to play in the airplane toilet? Sure! Baby wants to

crawl into the cockpit and bite the navigator on the ankle? Whatever baby

wants!

 

Here's what a stupid parent I am: On our first flight, I brought two newspapers

on board. I did not read one word of either one. What I read was a book called

Farm Faces, which is made entirely of cloth. There's a cow on the cover, and

each page has a new animal. Here's the entire text:

 

'Chick,' 'Lamb,' 'Pig,' 'Duck,' 'Horse,' 'Worm.''

 

I read this book to my daughter maybe 40 times, using a dramatic and excited

voice to show her how fascinating it was. I mean, talk about a surprise plot

twist! I NEVER would have guessed worm!

 

I also tried to interest Sophie in the in-flight movie, which was The Perfect

Storm, in which George Clooney goes to sea in a fishing boat and is killed by

special effects. Sophie did not care for it. I could see her point: I thought

Farm Faces was less formulaic.

 

It goes without saying that your baby will poop massively on the plane. This

must have something to do with atmospheric pressure, because it never fails.

Each year, more baby poop is produced on airplanes than in all of Portugal.

Fortunately, most planes have a little changing shelf in the bathroom, which

is the perfect size for a baby, provided that it is a baby gerbil. For human

babies, you have to use the seat, which then must be burned when the plane

lands.

 

The only really practical place to change a baby on an airplane would be on the

wing, but of course you can't take the baby out there. The other passengers

would never let you back inside.

 

You know what we need? We need an airline just for people with babies (it

could be called 'Shrieking Prairie Dogs From Hell Airlines'). The planes

would not have seats: Everyone would squat on the floor. The preflight safety

lecture would consist of a demonstration of how to get a Lego out of a child's

mouth. The inflight meal would be Cheerios eaten off the floor. If the noise

reached a certain decibel level, plastic tubes would automatically pop out

of the ceiling to dispense liquid horse tranquillser to the parents.

 

The inflight movie would be Farm Faces, starring George Clooney as: Worm.

:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

Oh.my.I.cannot.breathe....

[awisha.]

I'm horrified. I have been caught committing the world's worst forum offense. Since this is definitely a first for the Hive, I don't even know if it will get me banned or not. In any case, I'm sure the Hive will be a safer place now that my joke/connection that wasn't has been called out.

 

:snort: :lol:

[Parrothead]

:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

Oh.my.I.cannot.breathe....

:iagree: That was hilarious.

[SKL]

Can't you see how illogical that is?

 

Joke =/ logic.

 

I was accused of insulting people who don't CIO. That is why I got defensive. Speaking of logic: suggesting some people who let their kids cry in theatres don't CIO does not logically imply that ALL people who don't CIO let their kids terrorize the community.

 

Since some people don't want to let this go, I'd like to understand something. Why is this such a sensitive issue for people who don't CIO? I mean, I can understand the other side being sensitive because they are accused of being cruel and causing brain damage. Some pretty awful stuff. What are non-CIO parents being accused of, that they would care so much about? I mean, I've been accused of lots of things that I know aren't true, but only some of them really bug me. Being accused of being too nice isn't one of them. (Not that that happens very often.) (A little more dry humor there.)

[ThisIsTheDay]

And I have a dry sense of humor which I thought might be shared by other mature adults. But there, I am apparently wrong.

 

Once I figured out what CIO meant, I found it amusing. I have a dry sense of humor too, which I think of as a more sophisticated sense of humor.

 

But that's probably wishful thinking on my part. :D

[Annie Laurie]

Joke =/ logic.

 

I was accused of insulting people who don't CIO. That is why I got defensive. Speaking of logic: suggesting some people who let their kids cry in theatres don't CIO does not logically imply that ALL people who don't CIO let their kids terrorize the community.

 

Since some people don't want to let this go, I'd like to understand something. Why is this such a sensitive issue for people who don't CIO? I mean, I can understand the other side being sensitive because they are accused of being cruel and causing brain damage. Some pretty awful stuff. What are non-CIO parents being accused of, that they would care so much about? I mean, I've been accused of lots of things that I know aren't true, but only some of them really bug me. Being accused of being too nice isn't one of them. (Not that that happens very often.) (A little more dry humor there.)

 

I don't think you were accused of insulting people who don't CIO. It was a leap to say that the person who let their child cry for 3 hours during a performance must believe in no CIO. I asked what one had to do with the other.

 

I'm not feeling sensitive, and didn't feel I was being accused of anything.

[Tree House Academy]

Nice p/a insult. Well done.

 

I'm not discussing CIO or non CIO. I simply pointed out that you made a connection that wasn't - and a joke that wasn't.

 

I'm :chillpill:. But that doesn't mean I need to ignore your creating a reason to posit your admitted pet peeve in a thread that has nothing to do with it.

 

I read through this whole thread and I didn't think of her comment this way at all. I thought of it like the dance recital mom let her kid essentially CIO during the performance... and wouldn't it be amusing if she was a parent who didn't believe in CIO when the kid was a baby. It totally fits - she was making a reference to the parent allowing a 3 year old to essentially cry it out.

 

My kids are 13 and 9 and I can't remember if I let them CIO as babies or not. That was a lifetime ago. And who really cares anyway?? But thinking that SKL made that joke to "assert her agenda" sounds to me like someone is way too sensitive and taking something really simple and actually pretty amusing way too far. Does it really matter what she thinks of CIO? Do you really care what she thinks? If not, then let it go just because your entire tirade on her has now taken over this thread and YOU are the one making it about CIO. Goodness!

Edited June 17, 2012 by Tree House Academy

[Word Nerd]

I miss Dave Barry columns. At least there are many out there to read again!

[ChristyB in TN]

I am just completely gobsmacked by how long you all (dance families) sit at a recital! :ack2: I would be crying with the toddler. Once again, you all are tougher than me and evidently have unlimited patience. :blink:

[Mimm]

Two things:

 

First, yes. The parent should have removed the screaming child and tried to regain some sanity for everyone's sake.

 

Second, I'll bet they probably wanted to see their kid's solo, too and got overwhelmed by their toddler's meltdown. It helps not to get so pissed off at these situations if you can extend just a bit more grace than you think you can. After all, someone has probably thought the same thing when your toddler behaved like that at some point in your life. And if your toddler never did such a thing, then you are truly blessed. Take pity on those who have had socially unfortunate episodes with our children.

 

No, I don't have pity for that kind of thing. Yes, I had toddlers who would scream and embarrass me in public. My older daughter was and is emotionally volatile (though less so in public these days!) But I took them away from other people! I don't have the right to impose them on other people. They are my children that I chose to bring into the world and it doesn't have to ruin other people's evening just because I refuse to deal with their misbehavior. Yes, I'll have pity for the parent who missed their child performing because they had consideration for the other parents in the hall who just wanted to enjoy their child's recital not to mention the dancers who were probably nervous enough as it is, and probably found listening to a very distressed child rather distracting.

[kalanamak]

I am just completely gobsmacked by how long you all (dance families) sit at a recital! :ack2: I would be crying with the toddler. Once again, you all are tougher than me and evidently have unlimited patience. :blink:

 

And tough backsides, as me dare old mum used to say.

Edited June 18, 2012 by kalanamak

[SKL]

I don't think you were accused of insulting people who don't CIO.

 

See post 116.

[clarkacademy]

I read through this whole thread and I didn't think of her comment this way at all. I thought of it like the dance recital mom let her kid essentially CIO during the performance... and wouldn't it be amusing if she was a parent who didn't believe in CIO when the kid was a baby. It totally fits - she was making a reference to the parent allowing a 3 year old to essentially cry it out.

 

My kids are 13 and 9 and I can't remember if I let them CIO as babies or not. That was a lifetime ago. And who really cares anyway?? But thinking that SKL made that joke to "assert her agenda" sounds to me like someone is way too sensitive and taking something really simple and actually pretty amusing way too far. Does it really matter what she thinks of CIO? Do you really care what she thinks? If not, then let it go just because your entire tirade on her has now taken over this thread and YOU are the one making it about CIO. Goodness!

 

:iagree:I still think she was funny too. Just like the majority of the parents who act like this are the same that will flip if you offer to help :D