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"I've been homeschooling since BIRTH!" and other things that make you cringe


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LOL, I like to respond with, "Oh, not me!" And then I follow up with, "I figured that way, when I started kindergarten with them, it would really blow their minds."

 

:D

 

It generally saves the conversation from going places that will make me want to start drinking. ;)

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When I belonged to a homeschool group, the first meeting of the year involved introducing ourselves, and of course it included saying how long you had homeschooled. You could see the eyes roll when someone with a brand new kindergartener said she's been homeschooling for five years.

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Isn't there a distinction though? I mean, I am one of those that says I've been homeschooling since birth, because I knew I wanted to homeschool since before my kids were born. What that means to me is: the kids have never attended an out-of-house preschool and the kids have never been in public school. Since "school" in my neck of the woods starts at 2 1/2 (which is when the preschools start calling) I don't think it's beefing up my resume to say I've been homeschooling since birth. It's saying that I've taken responsibility for my kids education since they were born.

 

How do you all take it since you find it so offensive?

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I'm surprised that people have only heard it from people with young children. I'm nearly positive that the first handful of people I heard it from had children in the middle school range.

 

I would say that we planned on homeschooling before our children were born. I wouldn't say we were actually homeschooling at that point.

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I don't think it offensive, but I do think it is a silly thing to say. When people ask how long I have been homeschooling, I say, "we have always homeschooled." That lets them know that my kids have never been in school, but it doesn't try to imply that I was that different from people who eventually put their kids in school. Plenty of kids go to K knowing how to read. They didn't learn by magic.

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Well I have been home schooling 5 of mine since they were born.

 

I have proof in pictures.

 

There is me nursing while explaining Herodotus.

 

There is the baby laying in the middle of the school table and nibbling on his board books with several/all siblings doing their school work around him.

 

There is the infant/toddler sitting in the middle of the table with crayons and paper while we do an activity or lesson.

 

There is the baby/toddler in the stroller at the historical reenactment event.

 

There is the vid of baby making the a-a-a sound and his 2 year old sister telling him, "that's right you awesome smart boy! A-a-apple!!!" and him giggling like a loon.

 

There is the vid of his 6 year old sister touching each of her fingers to his and saying, "onnnne. You'll be walking then! Twooooo. You'll be running by then! Threeeee. You'll be annoying to everyone, but we will love you anyways! (obviously she has a 3 year old sister.:glare:) ....four.... Five... Six! I am six and it is awesome!"

 

So I guess my homeschooling since birth is not an approved program by your standards?

 

But it's working for us.

 

And we think it's way better than most programs money buys these days.

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Isn't there a distinction though? I mean, I am one of those that says I've been homeschooling since birth, because I knew I wanted to homeschool since before my kids were born. What that means to me is: the kids have never attended an out-of-house preschool and the kids have never been in public school. Since "school" in my neck of the woods starts at 2 1/2 (which is when the preschools start calling) I don't think it's beefing up my resume to say I've been homeschooling since birth. It's saying that I've taken responsibility for my kids education since they were born.

 

How do you all take it since you find it so offensive?

 

Yes, but just because you enroll your child in a B&M school or preschool does not mean you are abdicating your responsibility for your child's education.

 

I know around here pre-k programs start at 3 years, but it is really common to keep kids at home until kindergarten. Most people I've run into do lots of story time and play groups during this age, and it is really hard to tell a difference between the families that will homeschool and those that will attend PS. (Unless there are older siblings hanging around on a school day. :) )

 

When I talk about starting school with mine, I use the year we start a planned curriculum. Since I have a 13 year scope and sequence planned out, I start counting from age 4. The truth is that two of mine have started earlier than that. One from older sibling envy, one from being the oldest. (See my post on my biggest mistake! :001_smile: ) If someone was doing a planned curriculum from birth it might not irritate me. Otherwise it would cause me to do an internal eye roll and think, ROOKIE! :tongue_smilie:

 

 

ETA- what Martha described above, an intentional plan, to me that is a curriculum. I think lots of us with a range of ages are giving the little kids exposure to some great learning opportunities. I think those exposures are acctually better than anything a pre-k program could hope to offer. When people say it in that context it does not even cause me to bat an eye. It is only when someone with only littles says it that I fight a smirk.

Edited by BLA5
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Isn't there a distinction though? I mean, I am one of those that says I've been homeschooling since birth, because I knew I wanted to homeschool since before my kids were born. What that means to me is: the kids have never attended an out-of-house preschool and the kids have never been in public school. Since "school" in my neck of the woods starts at 2 1/2 (which is when the preschools start calling) I don't think it's beefing up my resume to say I've been homeschooling since birth. It's saying that I've taken responsibility for my kids education since they were born.

How do you all take it since you find it so offensive?

 

I'm with Meghan. Why does it matter?

 

I guess according to previous posters, I've only been "Really Homeschooling" for two years now. But when your area has a culture of shipping kids off on the Head Start bus at age 2 or getting in line at 3 a.m. to get your toddler in the "good preschool", you get flack for keeping them home . . . from birth.

 

So, we're not doing it like mainstream society expects us too. And apparently we're not Real Homeschoolers if they're not "of age." Things that make you go Hmmm.

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I'm with Meghan. Why does it matter?

 

I guess according to previous posters, I've only been "Really Homeschooling" for two years now. But when your area has a culture of shipping kids off on the Head Start bus at age 2 or getting in line at 3 a.m. to get your toddler in the "good preschool", you get flack for keeping them home . . . from birth.

 

So, we're not doing it like mainstream society expects us too. And apparently we're not Real Homeschoolers if they're not "of age." Things that make you go Hmmm.

 

:lol::lol::lol::lol: :grouphug: From a fellow imposter !

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Well I have been home schooling 5 of mine since they were born.

 

I have proof in pictures.

 

There is me nursing while explaining Herodotus.

 

There is the baby laying in the middle of the school table and nibbling on his board books with several/all siblings doing their school work around him.

 

There is the infant/toddler sitting in the middle of the table with crayons and paper while we do an activity or lesson.

 

There is the baby/toddler in the stroller at the historical reenactment event.

 

There is the vid of baby making the a-a-a sound and his 2 year old sister telling him, "that's right you awesome smart boy! A-a-apple!!!" and him giggling like a loon.

 

There is the vid of his 6 year old sister touching each of her fingers to his and saying, "onnnne. You'll be walking then! Twooooo. You'll be running by then! Threeeee. You'll be annoying to everyone, but we will love you anyways! (obviously she has a 3 year old sister.:glare:) ....four.... Five... Six! I am six and it is awesome!"

 

So I guess my homeschooling since birth is not an approved program by your standards?

 

But it's working for us.

 

And we think it's way better than most programs money buys these days.

Aww...:001_wub: How sweet your big kids are to your littles.

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I don't know, when I see that I sort of think it is meant tongue in cheek, because that is the way I have used it a couple of times. I don't really think I am "homeschooling" my toddlers. I just mean the kids have never been to school.

 

OTOH I do think homeschoolers may be more intentional with what they do with their toddlers and preschoolers, because they don't send them to any sort of school even at young ages. Mom is it. I don't know many non-homeschooling parents that didn't send their children to preschool starting at age 2 or 3.

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So, we're not doing it like mainstream society expects us too. And apparently we're not Real Homeschoolers if they're not "of age." Things that make you go Hmmm.

 

Yeah. My children will have to be 8 before they are really homeschooled, but a child in a different state will be homeschooling at 6. It doesn't matter if we are doing the same exact thing.

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I tend to start the count at the age a child is legally required to go to school (or Kindergarten in an area where the legal age is higher) and don't include preschool or pre-K activities when folks ask how long I've homeschooled. I think most parents teach their preschoolers at home if they don't send them to a program, but that seems like a very different thing than committing to being a homeschooler of school-aged children.

 

"Homeschooling since birth" seems to set the default at homeschooling and it only changes when a child enrolls in school. Homeschooling is just too far from the norm to be the default setting.

Edited by KungFuPanda
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I just don't consider teaching a child to use the potty or manners or how to tie his/her shoe, or even the alphabet, etc. "homeschooling". It's parenting. (Not to bring up that recent thread!) There isn't some line drawn in the sand or anything, but there is a difference in there. No one's going to tell you to stop, so if you need to say it for your own self-confidence just continue ignoring the questioning looks over the fuzzy math or the chuckling! LOL

 

And I *do* think it has something to do with the typical, rabid competition among women, along the lines of those who know down to the minute how long their labor was for every child so that they can compare who suffered longest in giving birth.

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I'm really surprised by this post. When I've heard that comment I just assume they mean they've always homeschooled. In fact, I may have said it myself before....and simply meant my kids have never been in school outside the home. :tongue_smilie: Gosh, it's posts like this that make me second think everything I say.

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I don't think it offensive, but I do think it is a silly thing to say. When people ask how long I have been homeschooling, I say, "we have always homeschooled." That lets them know that my kids have never been in school, but it doesn't try to imply that I was that different from people who eventually put their kids in school. Plenty of kids go to K knowing how to read. They didn't learn by magic.

:iagree:

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I just don't consider teaching a child to use the potty or manners or how to tie his/her shoe, or even the alphabet, etc. "homeschooling". It's parenting. (Not to bring up that recent thread!) There isn't some line drawn in the sand or anything, but there is a difference in there. No one's going to tell you to stop, so if you need to say it for your own self-confidence just continue ignoring the questioning looks over the fuzzy math or the chuckling! LOL

 

And I *do* think it has something to do with the typical, rabid competition among women, along the lines of those who know down to the minute how long their labor was for every child so that they can compare who suffered longest in giving birth.

:iagree:

I guess it sounds somewhat pretentious...at least, that's been my experience w/those I've heard say it.

 

Cause somehow that makes them somehow 'better' than someone that made the decision later, or even *gasp* pulled their kid out of ps at some point.

 

"I started hsing my zygote!"

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I gotta say, whenever I hear that line, I just shake my head and look for the bean dip. It always seems to come from a mom with really young kids looking to beef up her homeschooling resume. :banghead:

 

It falls into the "Bless your heart!" category of things I hope I never said, but probably did. :tongue_smilie:

 

I may have said that before. But I really have. I started doing child-development activities with my oldest ds when he was born, which probably contributed to his early cognitive abilities, which contributed to his early academic advances, which led to my decision to homeschool him for academic reasons, which led to us living a homeschool lifestyle, which led to homeschooling the rest of our children. So, although I've legally homeschooling school-age children for 12 years, and I don't feel the need to "beef up" my homeschooling resume, I truly do feel that I have been homeschooling since they were born. But, I'm more likely to say "we've always homeschooled" than "I've been homeschooling them since birth."

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Well, I don't say that or think it but after seeing the enormous range of abilities my kindergarten-teaching friend starts out each year with I think I might would agree. She has a class of around 18. In her class the kids who came from staying at home range from 'unable to tell the difference between a 1 and an A or know a single color' to 'reading small words and/or counting to 20 or more'.

 

Somebody has definitely been homeschooling one and not the other. The difference is there every year. It's amazing. I don't see how it's even possible to avoid teaching things naturally with small children. I've always found them so interested. I'm not saying they neglected their children but the other child was definitely educated while at home.

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I just don't consider teaching a child to use the potty or manners or how to tie his/her shoe, or even the alphabet, etc. "homeschooling". It's parenting. (Not to bring up that recent thread!) There isn't some line drawn in the sand or anything, but there is a difference in there. No one's going to tell you to stop, so if you need to say it for your own self-confidence just continue ignoring the questioning looks over the fuzzy math or the chuckling! LOL

 

And I *do* think it has something to do with the typical, rabid competition among women, along the lines of those who know down to the minute how long their labor was for every child so that they can compare who suffered longest in giving birth.

 

Ah, but I keep a mental tab of each labor length and the total amount of time preggers, in labor, and nursing so when I rant at my herd I can elicite the proper amount of guilt. :tongue_smilie:

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I guess I do think there is some kind of distinction - around here, it's very common for infants/toddlers/preschoolers to be at library storytime, playgroups, Saturday science club, etc. Then at age 5, most of those kids are enrolled in kindergarten, and the others homeschool. Would it be odd if the parents who enroll their kids said they homeschooled for five years? Many of my friends did just what we did when our kids were under school age- reading, museum trips, etc. But we just thought it was parenting. And my friends who send their kids to school would likely be offended if I said they homeschooled for five years.g

 

But if others want to plan and implement a homeschool program for their young kids, I don't argue with their declaration that they've homeschooled since birth. In our area, it's usually unschoolers who start counting homeschooling years from birth.

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I tend to start the count at the age a child is legally required to go to school and don't include preschool or pre-K activities when folks ask how long I've homeschooled. I think most parents teach their preschoolers at home if they don't send them to a program, but that seems like a very different thing than committing to being a homeschooler of school-aged children.

 

"Homeschooling since birth" seems to set the default at homeschooling and it only changes when a child enrolls in school. Homeschooling is just too far from the norm to be the default setting.

:iagree:

although I'll modify that to say when a child is 5 or 6, as some states' compulsory school age is 7 or 8. Most children will go to kindergarten, even in states where it isn't required.

 

There was a young mother who was part of my homeschool group--one of the leaders, in fact. Both of her dc were younger than 5yo. She said she wanted homeschooling to be such a part of her life (and theirs) that it would be the most natural thing in the world for the dc to stay home when they were 5 instead of going off to school. I thought that was a great idea...but guess what? When her ds was 5, off he went to kindergarten. Go figure. :001_huh:

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These threads are driving me nuts. I cringe when other people tell me when I started homeschooling.

 

Honestly, I do think that's a bit silly to say you started at birth. But whatever, I also think it's silly to let the government's age of compulsory schooling define when you technically start. And I think it's insulting to have people make rules about it all.

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I gotta say, whenever I hear that line, I just shake my head and look for the bean dip. It always seems to come from a mom with really young kids looking to beef up her homeschooling resume. :banghead:

 

It falls into the "Bless your heart!" category of things I hope I never said, but probably did. :tongue_smilie:

 

:leaving: I did say that at times in my early homeschooling career. (I am allowed to call it a "career," I hope. :tongue_smilie:) Part of it for me was that I was very interested in early childhood education at the time, so once I was "home-pre-schooling," it felt a lot like I was homeschooling. Friends already thought I was bizarre, so I did try on the homeschooling label before grade school age.

 

When I did say it, I meant to clarify that my kids had never been to school, preschool, daycare or anything like that.

 

I don't say it anymore; I've already devoted an ungodly amount of time to this pursuit and I don't see an end in sight, so it doesn't seem like something to brag about anymore. :auto:

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On another forum recently this same subject came up-- someone wondered who would find "homeschooling since birth" offensive (or if not offensive at least worthy of an eye roll).

 

I guess I can kind of see both sides (how very libra of me!)

 

I made up my mind to homeschool when my oldest dd was 3 and have been moving towards that goal. My dd is now in her kindergarten year but technically I don't even have to let anyone know officially until she is in 1st.

Since she was 3 I did notice that I seemed to do more educational and instructional activities with her than a majority of my friends who planned on eventually placing their children in formal school. I don't mean I was sitting over my little 3 year old with a ruler demanding she conjugate verbs or anything. But I have made it a point to show how everything can be made an educational experience-- a fun educational experience.

 

That being said, a lot of my friends refrain from "turning things educational" because for them education= tediousness boredom. In fact, one of my friends who unschools recently made a post on Facebook asking "where are all the homeschooling families who want to hang out and NOT make it an educational trip". :glare: Like there is something annoying about those families who incorporate insights and make connections in the course of their day....

 

I don't get that mindset- why would anyone actively try to withhold learning. I believe one of homeschooling's greatest advantages to be the fact that we have in our power the opportunity to de-vilify words like "learning" and "education".

 

ANYWHO--- Maybe people who choose to say "homeschool from birth" mean they take more of hands on approach to fostering a foundation of education from the start versus the mindset of waiting until kindergarten or first grade to begin.

 

On the flip side- having been able to spend time with homeschooling families who have been doing it for 5, 10 or 20 years with numerous kids and seeing the demands and rewards-- seeing the level of sacrifice and planning, organizing and recording - makes me realize I have not yet begun to homeschool.

 

Kindergarten is a walk in the park...

 

So maybe people/families with more experience under their belt feel that "homeschooling" encompasses all of those demands and deadlines and those checks and balances are not needed prior to "official" schooling.

 

Just my two cents...

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These threads are driving me nuts. I cringe when other people tell me when I started homeschooling.

 

Honestly, I do think that's a bit silly to say you started at birth. But whatever, I also think it's silly to let the government's age of compulsory schooling define when you technically start. And I think it's insulting to have people make rules about it all.

 

:iagree: I really don't see what the big deal is. Yes, it's a kind of "silly" thing to say but I've never thought about getting annoyed by it when I hear it.:chillpill: People say silly, stupid things all the time.:D

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These threads are driving me nuts. I cringe when other people tell me when I started homeschooling.

 

Honestly, I do think that's a bit silly to say you started at birth. But whatever, I also think it's silly to let the government's age of compulsory schooling define when you technically start. And I think it's insulting to have people make rules about it all.

 

:iagree:

 

And this completely doesn't even tough on the many home schoolers who really don't change a thing when their child gets older. They just keep on living life as they are and call themselves relaxed or unschoolers or whatever.

 

Does buying a math book to use at age 6 make me a homeschooler?

 

What if I bought the very same book to use at age 2?

 

Who cares? And why do they care?

 

I don't say it bc I pulled my older two out to homeschool. I have commented that if I could go back in time, I would have home schooled all of them from birth and never given a thought to sending them to a brick and mortar school.

 

ETA: again I worry I might not make it to the post office and library without offending someone...

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Well, I don't think I've ever said that, though I do tell people that we plan to hs and I've been researching it since dd was born.

 

I really think it depends on which culture you identify with. For someone like me, who has been involved with the hsing community since dd was an infant simply because we believe so strongly in it, saying "We homeschool," probably doesn't seem strange. It's our community. It's a huge part of our lives. It would be even weirder not to talk about it at all simply because said child hasn't reached the compulsory attendance age.

 

I'm not going to nitpick to death the terminology that people decide to use. I'm just happy that there are so many education options now.

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Some people I know and love say that, and I am glad that they are so educationally-oriented.

 

That said, I have several good friends who have always had theirs in public or private school, and they are also very educationally-oriented. Certainly they taught their littles before they went off to the classroom and are constantly monitoring and tutoring their older ones. One told me that she figures that she spends an average of three hours a day calling/emailing teachers, going to school events, monitoring homework, checking homework, getting books and supplies for reports, etc. etc. She has five kids, and they're all flourishing in public school because she's so involved. That's the bottom line, IMHO.

 

For mine, I say "always homeschooled." That's actually fairly rare among our local friends. Most did outside preschool if nothing else, and many did at least a few years of public or private school with one or more of their kids.

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Since my oldest attended first grade, I just count from his second grade homeschooling. I don't really care about when my other kids started homeschooling. They did start before five but since I already had the oldest one schooling, of course they were learning. I was just looking yesterday at a video of my middle reading when she was four and a few months. I hadn't remembered she read so early, mainly because she didn't start reading long books until she was about eight and her vision was fixed. But looking at that video, I know she was being homeschooled at age four. Doesn't matter though since I count the years I have been officially homeschooling one or another -so I am on my 17th year and probably will have homeschooled for 20 years when I retire from it (much like the PS school systems I knew that had retirement for teachers starting at 20 years). I will be retirement age too- 52 by then.

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Well I have been home schooling 5 of mine since they were born.

 

I have proof in pictures.

 

There is me nursing while explaining Herodotus.

 

There is the baby laying in the middle of the school table and nibbling on his board books with several/all siblings doing their school work around him.

 

There is the infant/toddler sitting in the middle of the table with crayons and paper while we do an activity or lesson.

 

There is the baby/toddler in the stroller at the historical reenactment event.

 

There is the vid of baby making the a-a-a sound and his 2 year old sister telling him, "that's right you awesome smart boy! A-a-apple!!!" and him giggling like a loon.

 

There is the vid of his 6 year old sister touching each of her fingers to his and saying, "onnnne. You'll be walking then! Twooooo. You'll be running by then! Threeeee. You'll be annoying to everyone, but we will love you anyways! (obviously she has a 3 year old sister.:glare:) ....four.... Five... Six! I am six and it is awesome!"

 

So I guess my homeschooling since birth is not an approved program by your standards?

 

But it's working for us.

 

And we think it's way better than most programs money buys these days.

 

 

This post made me :D

 

 

I tend to start the count at the age a child is legally required to go to school (or Kindergarten in an area where the legal age is higher) and don't include preschool or pre-K activities when folks ask how long I've homeschooled. I think most parents teach their preschoolers at home if they don't send them to a program, but that seems like a very different thing than committing to being a homeschooler of school-aged children.

 

"Homeschooling since birth" seems to set the default at homeschooling and it only changes when a child enrolls in school. Homeschooling is just too far from the norm to be the default setting.

 

Sadly, the bolded IME is not necessarily true.

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I'm really surprised by this post. When I've heard that comment I just assume they mean they've always homeschooled. In fact, I may have said it myself before....and simply meant my kids have never been in school outside the home. :tongue_smilie: Gosh, it's posts like this that make me second think everything I say.

 

:iagree:

 

I know for a fact that I've said it in the past. When asked how long we've homeschooled (which isn't very often), I typically say "we've always homeschooled". My dh and I decided before we got married that if we had kids we would homeschool. We didn't have our first child until 6 years later. When I was pregnant with her I bought "educational" things if I found them at garage sales. :001_smile: It certainly doesn't mean that I was teaching her the abc's or her numbers as an infant. But....homeschooling was always in our lives once we were parents (so it was kinda from birth). I had no idea that saying that offended other homeschoolers, made them cringe, made their eyes roll, made them look around for bean dip,.......

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Isn't there a distinction though? I mean, I am one of those that says I've been homeschooling since birth, because I knew I wanted to homeschool since before my kids were born. What that means to me is: the kids have never attended an out-of-house preschool and the kids have never been in public school. Since "school" in my neck of the woods starts at 2 1/2 (which is when the preschools start calling) I don't think it's beefing up my resume to say I've been homeschooling since birth. It's saying that I've taken responsibility for my kids education since they were born.

 

How do you all take it since you find it so offensive?

 

I think you had to be there. Since I personally used the line "we intend to homeschool", I think the offended here might have found that okay. I also didn't proclaim it with a Yuppie la de dah that makes people think that I feel I have the whole world by the credit card.

 

I had an interesting exchange last summer. It was a kid's birthday party and it was packed with well to do kids and SAHM. I was the only homeschooler. Most of the kids go to a very pricey private school. The hostess mentioned I homeschooled, and a couple of very sleek, well groomed, tanned, go-to-the-gym every day and fight gravity women asked me very nicely about it. We had a bit of a chat, and all went well until they found out I homeschool AND work full time. I didn't brag. I just said it took discipline. Well, a homeschooler okay but a woman who couldn't find a man in a suit to support me? Infradig! I was ignored the rest of the time.

 

My point is that if someone says they are a homeschooler since birth with the attitude these women discussed kids soccer teams, it puts one off.

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I don't get offended by it but it does get an eyeroll in my mind because it does come off as pretentious and competitive like most things in motherhood... whose child read the earliest, who breastfed the longest, whose child has never watched a lick of television, only plays with wooden toys, etc.

 

Mommy wars are so boring.

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Ok, I think I understand now. The attitude & volunteering of the information is what is offensive. However, if I understand correctly, if you met a mom at a homeschool event & were making small-talk and asked her "So, how long have you been homeschooling" and she responded "since birth" and had children older than 5, that wouldn't be offensive?

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I don't get offended by it but it does get an eyeroll in my mind because it does come off as pretentious and competitive like most things in motherhood... whose child read the earliest, who breastfed the longest, whose child has never watched a lick of television, only plays with wooden toys, etc.

 

Mommy wars are so boring.

 

We were in a preschool playgroup years ago, and the "mommy wars" made me get out. It was great to be with other moms of babies, but when the competition over potty training, preschools, and paid activities started, we quietly left. Only one mom "got" why I left and even called to let me know that she was on her way out too.

 

Then we got involved in homeschool groups, co-ops, and paid classes and it began again. Thankfully in larger groups you can usually find someone to hang out with that isn't competitive, and sometimes the positives outweigh the negatives.

Edited by GVA
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