Can a feminist homeschool her children?

[Halcyon]

I read this article today, and wondered if others could comment. I consider myself a feminist, in the sense that I believe that women are capable of doing just about anything a man can do, and that equal pay and consideration are fundamental rights. I have occasionally thought about how my feminism and my homeschooling impact each other, and I do know a couple of my working mom friends have made passing reference to how feminism and homeschooling are not a match. Of course, the fact that I work part-time makes it a bit more palatable to them.....hmmmm....

 

Thoughts?

 

ETA: The article references this article, Is Homeschooling Sexist?, which I am about to read.

[Bang!Zoom!]

I'm gonna have to read that about forty times to recover from logic shock.

 

I'll comment when recovered. :)

[momma aimee]

yes

 

i homeschool by CHOICE -- just as i might choose to be a CEO or to flight a fighter jet

 

if i worked i'd get equal pay -- and dh's female co-workers are his equals/

 

i choose to be home

[Catwoman]

Well, considering that these articles are from 2000 and 2002, I'm somewhat encouraged to see that the "debate" doesn't seem to have gone very far. ;)

 

Personally, I think feminism and homeschooling can co-exist just fine. I also think that it's a topic that people could argue about for pages and pages, simply because the word, feminism, has so many different connotations to different people.

 

I've got my popcorn... :lurk5:

[Carol in Cal.]

Of course feminists can homeschool. I know lots of feminist homeschoolers, both female and male.

[Halcyon]

The aspect that's always niggled at my brain is that I am almost wholly dependent on DH financially. I have decided that's fine because, well, we're dependent on each other for different things, right? He depends on me for certain things, and I depend on him for certain things, and that makes a marriage.

[KnitWit]

Why let ANYONE else define *you* for *you*?

 

Let them WATCH you do it while they say you can't or shouldn't.

[Rivka]

I could hardly make out the words of that article through the giant straw feminist covering most of the page.

[Veritaserum]

Heck yeah! Proud feminist here raising five girls. ;) I CHOOSE this. :)

[KnitWit]

The aspect that's always niggled at my brain is that I am almost wholly dependent on DH financially. I have decided that's fine because, well, we're dependent on each other for different things, right? He depends on me for certain things, and I depend on him for certain things, and that makes a marriage.

 

I think the point is that you are free to choose this life for yourself. Letting other women define it for you is no different to letting anyone ELSE define it for you. Does that make sense?

[Bang!Zoom!]

My mind just stutters on stuff like this.

 

So the first thing I have to do is go through a vetting process about the validity of the authorship credentials.

 

Here is Wendy McEloy's Wickepedia entry.

 

I'm saying nothing more.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wendy_McElroy

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I could hardly make out the words of that article through the giant straw feminist covering most of the page.

 

*wiping diet pepsi off computer monitor*

[Carol in Cal.]

The aspect that's always niggled at my brain is that I am almost wholly dependent on DH financially. I have decided that's fine because, well, we're dependent on each other for different things, right? He depends on me for certain things, and I depend on him for certain things, and that makes a marriage.

 

Certainly SAHM's are economically vulnerable. The fact that we can even talk about that is primarily thanks to feminism. However, feminism is all about choices, so I have never viewed actually being a SAHM as anti-feminist. Being a SAHM and putting one's head in the sand about being vulnerable could be, though.

[KnitWit]

Nice to see you Tibbie! :)

[sweetbasil]

Of course not!!! A feminist must do whatever any random self-described feminist (or group of self-described feminists) says is appropriate for a feminist to do.

 

To disobey the feminist authority du jour is to be anti-feminist!

 

We should all be ashamed of ourselves!!!

 

 

 

 

:smilielol5:

[dangermom]

Heck yeah! Proud feminist here raising five girls. ;) I CHOOSE this. :)

 

Yeah, this, only I have two of 'em. :001_smile:

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Nice to see you Tibbie! :)

 

Hey, there! I just noticed you on another thread and was about to say howdy. Good to see you, too!

[Rosie_0801]

Some mother-educators call themselves “feminists,â€

 

I don't. I call myself a feminist. No "" about it. And why would I care what leading feminists have to say? Feminism does not require me to follow them about as though they are gurus and I'm a fragile flower who needs mental and spiritual direction. And often those who do call themselves feminists and those who don't believe much the same things anyway, so what they call themselves doesn't tell anyone anything other than whether that woman objects to the word or not.

 

Lyster-Mensh asks other homeschooling moms what messages about gender are being sent to their children. When she assures her daughter that she can achieve anything in life, Lyster-Mensh wonders, “Am I telling her she can strive toward being a homeschooling mother? Am I telling her not to?†And what of sons? “They cannot fail to notice that the ones doing the homeschooling are the mothers. We have to ask ourselves what expectations this will leave them with for themselves and for their future spouses. In the workplace, will they be able to treat female co-workers as seriously as the men?â€

 

Dear Ms Lyster-Mensh,

You are over thinking this.

 

Sincerely,

Rosie the Feminist but not the kind of feminist you seem to be.

 

P.S. You might consider reading more feminist history. Second wave feminism is not the be all and end all. The first wave was quite interesting.

[JumpedIntoTheDeepEndFirst]

I always thought the point of feminism was the ability to choose what you wanted to do without being penalized for being a woman.

 

Clearly I was wrong-it is about choice as long as you make the pre-approved feminist choice. {do note the sarcasm in that sentence}

 

Of course you can be a feminist and homeschool.

[Audrey]

I read this article today, and wondered if others could comment. I consider myself a feminist, in the sense that I believe that women are capable of doing just about anything a man can do, and that equal pay and consideration are fundamental rights. I have occasionally thought about how my feminism and my homeschooling impact each other, and I do know a couple of my working mom friends have made passing reference to how feminism and homeschooling are not a match. Of course, the fact that I work part-time makes it a bit more palatable to them.....hmmmm....

 

Thoughts?

 

ETA: The article references this article, Is Homeschooling Sexist?, which I am about to read.

 

 

Ah, well... you see... this is coming from a view of homeschooling as being a fundy bastion. It isn't, obviously, but most non-homeschooling people do not know this, nor do they really care if it is an erroneous assumption.

[Bang!Zoom!]

I'm feeling incredibly impatient waiting for someone to say something about something.

 

Hint: It's about kilt-au-natural lovers sorta....kinda....:toetap05:

[Halcyon]

I didn't expect anyone on this board to agree with the sentiment. I just wonder sometimes. My father also wonders why he spent so much to send me to an Ivy League school if I'm "just" going to stay home and homeschool. :glare:

[Mommy22alyns]

I always thought the point of feminism was the ability to choose what you wanted to do without being penalized for being a woman.

 

Clearly I was wrong-it is about choice as long as you make the pre-approved feminist choice. {do note the sarcasm in that sentence}

 

Of course you can be a feminist and homeschool.

 

Exactly.

[Catwoman]

My father also wonders why he spent so much to send me to an Ivy League school if I'm "just" going to stay home and homeschool. :glare:

 

Did you tell him you hope he learned a valuable lesson about how he should have spent his money? ;)

[Dolphin]

Of course! I am a feminist and I homeschool. I believe in equality and I am at home teaching my children about it. We barely touched on Betsy Ross, but my kids are going to know who Alice Paul is. I hope that both my son and daughter get the message that voting is something very precious that was fought for many times. (The American Revolution, Civil War, AND the Woman's movement).

 

I choose to be home with my kids. I am in an area where not many woman choose that. It is not just this homeschooling article, but a lot of our society says that you can't stay home and be a feminist.

 

My brother in law is also a stay at home dad and my sister is the one who works. It is all about equality and being able to choose what works for your family.

[Bang!Zoom!]

:toetap05:

 

So like if Ms. McE had a book signing party of her 1997 work, I don't think I'd go.

 

:toetap05:

[missmoe]

I didn't expect anyone on this board to agree with the sentiment. I just wonder sometimes. My father also wonders why he spent so much to send me to an Ivy League school if I'm "just" going to stay home and homeschool. :glare:

 

Tell him he sent you to an Ivy League school so you can pass that top-notch education on to his grandkids!

 

It pains me to think some feel stay at home moms or homeschool moms don't need an education. Even if one feels that a women's place is only at home, isn't that women raising future men who will need to go out into the world educated!

 

As a feminist myself, I am proud that I have the choice to stay at home and teach my kids!

[PhotoGal]

I didn't expect anyone on this board to agree with the sentiment. I just wonder sometimes. My father also wonders why he spent so much to send me to an Ivy League school if I'm "just" going to stay home and homeschool. :glare:

 

Because he wants a strong, intelligent, and well-educated person to teach his grandkids! :)

 

Plus, your education shaped you as a person. Plus, you have the choice to pursue career and personal goals based on that foundation.

 

(Just the humble opinion of a fellow Ivy grad who has to occasionally answer herself as to why she worked her @&$ off at college - though my lucky parents got away without paying very much.)

[T'smom]

I haven't read the article- but I will NOT let a group of women (feminists) tell me what I can/can't do any more than I would let a man!

[Halcyon]

Did you tell him you hope he learned a valuable lesson about how he should have spent his money? ;)

 

What lesson is that?

[Halcyon]

Because he wants a strong, intelligent, and well-educated person to teach his grandkids! :)

 

Plus, your education shaped you as a person. Plus, you have the choice to pursue career and personal goals based on that foundation.

 

(Just the humble opinion of a fellow Ivy grad who has to occasionally answer herself as to why she worked her @&$ off at college - though my lucky parents got away without paying very much.)

 

 

I know you're right.

Edited January 5, 2012 by Halcyon

[Jennifer3141]

Ah, well... you see... this is coming from a view of homeschooling as being a fundy bastion. It isn't, obviously, but most non-homeschooling people do not know this, nor do they really care if it is an erroneous assumption.

 

 

:iagree::iagree: I think if someone has to ask the question about feminism and homeschooling, they already don't know very much about homeschooling and frankly, the information is only one google search away.

[kathymuggle]

:iagree::iagree: I think if someone has to ask the question about feminism and homeschooling, they already don't know very much about homeschooling and frankly, the information is only one google search away.

 

...and they don't know much about feminism

 

signed,

 

a feminist homeschooler

[Bang!Zoom!]

I'm all up for posting the entire first article and ripping it to shreds....line by line.

[Catwoman]

What lesson is that?

 

I have no idea. I think you need to act mysterious when you ask. :tongue_smilie:

[RegularMom]

I could hardly make out the words of that article through the giant straw feminist covering most of the page.

 

:lol:

 

I'm a feminist homeschooler.... I seem to be managing just fine here. :tongue_smilie:

[Alicia64]

The aspect that's always niggled at my brain is that I am almost wholly dependent on DH financially. I have decided that's fine because, well, we're dependent on each other for different things, right? He depends on me for certain things, and I depend on him for certain things, and that makes a marriage.

 

:iagree: Absolutely. I'm definitely a feminist as are my homeschooling friends and I'm hanging in there! :) My favorite quote:

 

"Homemaker is the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only -- to support the ultimate career!"

C.S. Lewis

[KnitWit]

Your dad sent you to an Ivy-league school and let you pursue your dream so that you COULD continue to make your own choices and pursue your dreams all throughout your whole life! That is the beauty of it! He didn't choose FOR YOU on the front end and ensure that *is* all you *could do*. kwim? He handed YOU the choice. :) How's that? ;)

[katilac]

The aspect that's always niggled at my brain is that I am almost wholly dependent on DH financially. I have decided that's fine because, well, we're dependent on each other for different things, right? He depends on me for certain things, and I depend on him for certain things, and that makes a marriage.

 

I am currently dependent on dh financially, but we have a completely different framework than most in the older generation (and even many in the current generation). We both regard it as our money, not his. We discuss all major purchases, not just mine. We are both comfortable with spending a certain amount of money at our own discretion. If dh did not feel this way, I would work and we would not home school.

 

As an aside, I always say that I have a COMPLETELY different viewpoint than my mom or his, because I did work before having kids. I know that there's nothing magical about it, that you can have a long hard day at home just as easily at work, and that there are no expense account lunches at home. When the kids were little, dh and I would (jokingly) battle over who had the hardest day, and I would ask, "Did you wipe anybody's butt today? No? I win."

 

Of course! I am a feminist and I homeschool. I believe in equality and I am at home teaching my children about it. We barely touched on Betsy Ross, but my kids are going to know who Alice Paul is.

 

I never heard of her myself, so thank you.

[Dana]

I am currently dependent on dh financially, but we have a completely different framework than most in the older generation (and even many in the current generation). We both regard it as our money, not his. We discuss all major purchases, not just mine. We are both comfortable with spending a certain amount of money at our own discretion. If dh did not feel this way, I would work and we would not home school.

 

As an aside, I always say that I have a COMPLETELY different viewpoint than my mom or his, because I did work before having kids. I know that there's nothing magical about it, that you can have a long hard day at home just as easily at work, and that there are no expense account lunches at home. When the kids were little, dh and I would (jokingly) battle over who had the hardest day, and I would ask, "Did you wipe anybody's butt today? No? I win."

 

 

:iagree:

 

Feminist homeschooler here.

I also teach nights, so my son sees my job as an educator.

It's also clear that it's my choice to stay home and teach him. My husband supports me fully and it's his choice that I stay home too.

 

I did have a rough transition to staying at home, but it's clearly "our" money and it was mainly my mindset that was the problem.

 

When my husband's home, he does the cooking and cleaning since I'm often doing other work :) My son's got a lot of good role models... and my husband considers himself a feminist too!

[MorganClassicalPrep]

I think the point is that you are free to choose this life for yourself. Letting other women define it for you is no different to letting anyone ELSE define it for you. Does that make sense?

 

I always thought the point of feminism was the ability to choose what you wanted to do without being penalized for being a woman.

 

Clearly I was wrong-it is about choice as long as you make the pre-approved feminist choice. {do note the sarcasm in that sentence}

 

Of course you can be a feminist and homeschool.

 

:iagree: Feminism (to me...) is not about being forced out of the home, it means being able to choose what path you take in life, and receiving equal pay/benefits if you so choose to work. How is a feminist telling me that I HAVE to work out of the home any different than a husband telling me I HAVE to stay home? (Although, I will work outside the home when I finish school, and I don't have a husband, so really not a relevant argument for me)

 

I didn't expect anyone on this board to agree with the sentiment. I just wonder sometimes. My father also wonders why he spent so much to send me to an Ivy League school if I'm "just" going to stay home and homeschool. :glare:

 

I was going to say "so you could get a quality education to his grandchildren" but I was beaten the to punch! :tongue_smilie:

[sheryl]

I don't see why not. Are there various definitions of feminist? I don't know...political, social, etc? Truly, I don't know. To me one can be a feminist and still h'school.

 

Back to door # 2. You can see I don't have the answer. ;)

[Catherine]

I started it but had to set it aside when I saw the sidebar article entitled "Ebenezer Scrooge: In his Own Defense."

[JennyD]

I could hardly make out the words of that article through the giant straw feminist covering most of the page.

 

LOL. No kidding. "PC feminism"? Doris LESSING?

 

Of course a feminist can homeschool. I will concede that there is a strain of academic feminism that has historically been quite critical of motherhood in general (Shulamith Firestone, anyone?) and stay-at-home motherhood in particular. This would be in sharp contrast to, say, feminist lawyers who have worked strenuously to reform divorce and property law to be more fair to financially dependent spouses, or feminist economists who argue that unpaid carework should be included in the GDP. It's a big tent, despite those who would have it be otherwise.

Edited January 5, 2012 by JennyD

[StephanieZ]

I am a feminist. I homeschool. I have many good friends who are also feminists and who also homeschool. I have other good friends, including RADICAL liberal feminists, who wish they could homeschool (but cannot b/c they are the primary breadwinner in their family).

 

IMHO, feminism is about empowering women to make CHOICES, and it is also about women being of equal humanity and importance relative to the man and children in the family.

 

I don't believe that feminism is at all contrary to choosing to homeschool.

 

Men and women each make choices to become interdependent on each other. I know of very few, if any, marriages (that involve minor children) in which both spouses would not be financially devastated if they divorced. It is simply very expensive to support double households.

 

I am dependent on my husband, and he is dependent on me. In different ways, certainly. Each member of our family matters. There are no martyrs in this house.

[mrbmom77]

"Divisive issues, such as the role of women in the home and society, are not discussed as openly as they might otherwise be."

 

:lol: Had to laugh at that. She's obviously never visited this forum!

 

And :iagree:with you all, of course. I'm a working single mom who homeschools. I've never let a man tell me who I should be and I won't let other women, either.

 

ETA: Thought I should say that I don't particularly consider myself a feminist, so maybe I'm not qualified to comment on this. :)

Edited January 5, 2012 by mrbmom77

[Greenmama2]

Yeah, this, only I have two of 'em. :001_smile:

 

Proud feminist with one girl, one boy.

[Critterfixer]

My father also wonders why he spent so much to send me to an Ivy League school if I'm "just" going to stay home and homeschool.

 

No offense, but can I just say, SHAME ON HIM!

The idea, that a parent, by spending money on a child can continue to lay claim to the way that child chooses to use that education seems demeaning to me. And I'm wouldn't call myself a feminist.

[Cammie]

I don't. I call myself a feminist. No "" about it. And why would I care what leading feminists have to say? Feminism does not require me to follow them about as though they are gurus and I'm a fragile flower who needs mental and spiritual direction. And often those who do call themselves feminists and those who don't believe much the same things anyway, so what they call themselves doesn't tell anyone anything other than whether that woman objects to the word or not.

 

 

 

Dear Ms Lyster-Mensh,

You are over thinking this.

 

Sincerely,

Rosie the Feminist but not the kind of feminist you seem to be.

 

P.S. You might consider reading more feminist history. Second wave feminism is not the be all and end all. The first wave was quite interesting.

 

 

I know we hardly know each other, but I love you Rosie!