Would you leave your 5 yo...

[kalanamak]

That is crazy! I've met your husband and he seems the most harmless of all men! I'm so sorry he (and your son) deal with this!

 

We joke that kiddo ought to start calling him Grandpa, loudly, every few minutes. That would fly. He is, after all, old enough to be great grandpa to the toddlers there.

[m0mmaBuck]

We joke that kiddo ought to start calling him Grandpa, loudly, every few minutes. That would fly. He is, after all, old enough to be great grandpa to the toddlers there.

 

:lol::lol::lol:

You could get a lot of mileage out of that one!

[LittleIzumi]

Yes, I would, but she would be buckled in her carseat. (you didn't mention that part)

:iagree: We have a community mailbox. I leave everyone buckled in the locked car while I walk across the grass to the mailboxes at the "clubhouse." It's maybe 20-25 feet? But I'm only there for a minute getting the mail & pulling out the junk. I usually open it in the car.

[Mom0012]

No. But only because I had a friend do this and went through an incredibly horrifying ordeal with CPS because a worker at the store she was parked at called the police. She did absolutely nothing wrong - this lady is a very dear friend of mine and would never put her children in any kind of danger - but this nutso worker called the police and my friend had to go before a judge (several times) and finally got the charges dismissed. It was terrifying for her and her entire family. Therefore, even though, technically, I see nothing wrong with your scenario, I just don't trust people not to be nuts.:tongue_smilie:

 

:iagree: I know of two people this has happened to. It didn't go to court, like in the above scenario, but was still a traumatic experience for each woman. One person was threatened by some attorneys that if they ever did it again, they would call the police. The other person was threatened by an undercover police officer who happened to be passing by.

 

I also remember being in a playgroup when my children were young and one of the moms said she saw someone move from one parking space to another without their child strapped into a carseat and felt she should have called the police. I was shocked, to say the least.

 

So, no. My kids are 11 and 9 and I live in a small town and won't even leave them while I take the two steps from the car to drop a letter in a mail slot. Not because I feel it isn't safe, but because there are so many busybodies these days that feel they need to step in and "protect" other people's children.

 

Lisa

[Mommy22alyns]

I would do it.

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

Maybe. Depends on where we were and why said child needed to be in the car.

 

:iagree: Also, it would depend on the weather. If it were hot, the kid would not be in the car at all.

[Mom0012]

I was thinking about this some more and wanted to add that, for some reason, I am always on high alert when pumping gas. I have a minivan and can't open the door nearest to me and the kids when I am pumping gas and I think I've heard of too many carjacking stories taking place at the gas station. I always think about what I would do if someone approached me with a gun and told me to give them my keys. My first thought would be to throw them into the bottom of my purse where they might never be found again, LOL.:001_smile:

 

Lisa

[1GirlTwinBoys]

I would but not with the keys in the car. As long as they are in my full view and I'm that close, it's not an issue for me.

 

I also don't make my kid's wear seat belts if we're just driving across a parking lot to another store.:) I can't believe someone would want to call the police for something like that. :001_huh:

[JessReplanted]

yes, in the right circumstances.

[JessReplanted]

We joke that kiddo ought to start calling him Grandpa, loudly, every few minutes. That would fly. He is, after all, old enough to be great grandpa to the toddlers there.

 

Oh, that is funny!! My dad is 55 and about to have a baby (with his 2nd wife). :lol:

[Renee in NC]

The only law on the books here is as follows:

RCW 9.91.060 (Leaving children unattended in parked automobile) provides: "Every person having the care and custody, whether temporary or permanent, of minor children under the age of twelve years, who shall leave such children in a parked automobile unattended by an adult while such person enters a tavern or other premises where vinous, spirituous, or malt liquors are dispensed for consumption on the premises shall be guilty of a gross misdemeanor."

 

We had a policeman talk to our MOMS group and he said that as long as the car isn't running and you aren't in front of a liquor store or a bar, there is no law against it.

 

I've left the kids in the car (locked, keys in my hand) for a minute or less while I ran in to grab my mail but only if I can park directly in front of the mailbox place (that has glass windows so I can see them the entire time). I wouldn't think anything of leaving the kids in the car while I stood outside it talking to someone for a few minutes.

 

:lol: So, my grandfather, who used to take my mother, her sister, and her brother to the bar with him and leave them in the car for 3-4 hours at a time while he was drinking inside would be in trouble? (We won't even go into the fact that he would drive them home after 3-4 hours of drinking!!!!)

[Renee in NC]

There was a news story not that long ago where parents were standing outside there car little one asleep in the car talking to some one else they were travel cross country with when a man showed up out of know where and stole the car. No thanks I would drag my five year olds hiney to stand next to me.

 

They were 15 feet away with an unlocked car running and they were facing the other direction - no, I would not to that!

[Nestof3]

When I leave the boys to return a cart, I lock the doors. Any attempt to open the doors without a key results in a loud, horrible alarm -- even an attempt from the inside. As long as the doors were locked with the keys, I know if a person from the inside is trying to get out.

 

What I couldn't do is have my child go off on a bus every day (or walk down the street to school, or ride around the neighborhood alone at 6 years old) and trust that they will be watched and taken care of. I think it's rather interesting what concerns one parent over the other. I personally think the woman should have shut her mouth.

 

Because of what happened this afternoon, your scenario makes me paranoid now. I did leave my 5 yo and when I opened the car door to get back in, the woman in the car next to me got out and walked over. She was very nice but told me that I should consider next time before doing it again because someone could have come along and grabbed my dd out of the car. (I think I would have noticed that...and she was buckled in!) I thanked her for her concern and left. I was very grateful she didn't call the police!

 

It truly was only 4-5 minutes and I truly was about 15 ft from the car the whole time. It wasn't hot and the windows were down halfway. It's a stick shift so she couldn't have started the car even if she had the keys. :) She was buckled up in the back and waiting very patiently. It wasn't busy. The lady parked next to me was the only one nearby. Everyone except a baseball coach and a couple of kids was on the other side of the field. We were parked by my son's baseball field on a neighborhood street. Just down from the city courthouse in fact. It really surprised me that someone would be so concerned over it to talk to a stranger. I don't think it was a gross neglect situation. I'm pretty relaxed but wondered if maybe I was getting too lax! I did read in the paper the other day about a woman leaving her 2 yo in the Walmart parking lot while she went in to cash a check. I do look young for my age so she might have assumed it was my first child and was worried I would try the same thing.

[Nestof3]

I think at 9 I was riding my bike to the store by myself to pick up a couple things for my Mom.;)

Totally OT but your "old bat" comment reminded me. When DD was about a year old, we were out on a fall day, she was wearing long sleeves and leggings. This old lady stopped us and said to DD "you should tell your Mommy to put a sweater on you!!!!". It was 75 degrees outside.:rolleyes:

 

Haven't you ever heard that a sweater is something you wear when your grandmother is cold?

 

Seriously, I got so tired of random shoppers telling me my child should be wearing more. My kids and I are both hot-natured, esp. Nathan. Since when did parents become so inept?

[Renee in NC]

When I leave the boys to return a cart, I lock the doors. Any attempt to open the doors without a key results in a loud, horrible alarm -- even an attempt from the inside. As long as the doors were locked with the keys, I know if a person from the inside is trying to get out.

 

What I couldn't do is have my child go off on a bus every day (or walk down the street to school, or ride around the neighborhood alone at 6 years old) and trust that they will be watched and taken care of. I think it's rather interesting what concerns one parent over the other. I personally think the woman should have shut her mouth.

 

I said in the other thread about how I will let mine go on the bus, but I thought about it some and I will only let my 6yo ride the bus if she has a brother with her. I don't know if it is because she is young or a girl or both.

[TammyinTN]

Absolutely.

[Kathleen in VA]

:iagree:So much can happen.

In fact I was probably that nutso clerk the other day. I took my oldest son to the eye Dr the other day and as I was helping him unload I saw 2 very young children in the car next to us.(18 month and maybe 3-4 month olds). I sort of hung around for a few minutes while my ds was trundling to the back where the ramp was. Still no adult. I quickly went inside and told the receptionist that there were two very young children in a car in their parking lot. She went into over drive to find the parent. The mom was over trying on glasses. The receptionist told her that she would need to either go out and bring the babies in or go out and stay and the receptionist would bring glasses out to her. The mom was not happy at all.

I know that the child you are talking about is older and you said that you would only be 15 ft away but..........

 

 

Well, like I said, my friend did absolutely nothing wrong - she was standing near the car, just not in it. She was right there within sight - not inside the building. When I said nutso, I meant nutso.

[Harriet Vane]

In full view with the car turned off--definitely yes.

[NanceXToo]

Yes. And like others said, he'd be buckled in his carseat, I'd have the doors locked and the keys in my hand, and I'd be keeping an eye out that he didn't look to be getting upset or anything.

[texasmama]

I was thinking about this some more and wanted to add that, for some reason, I am always on high alert when pumping gas. I have a minivan and can't open the door nearest to me and the kids when I am pumping gas and I think I've heard of too many carjacking stories taking place at the gas station. I always think about what I would do if someone approached me with a gun and told me to give them my keys. My first thought would be to throw them into the bottom of my purse where they might never be found again, LOL.:001_smile:

 

Lisa

 

I always lock my car and hold the keys with me while pumping gas so no one tries to grab my purse out of the opposite side of the car.

[angela in ohio]

Depends on the child. My children would have been fine, but I've met some children I wouldn't leave like that. I wouldn't leave the car running or the keys in it, as that is illegal. I generally would take my dc in to places or out of the car, though, because I doubt they love being stuck sitting in the car all the time, and they learn more by getting out and seeing the world.

 

It would also depend on the temperature, of course.

Edited March 6, 2011 by angela in ohio

[angela in ohio]

I always lock my car and hold the keys with me while pumping gas so no one tries to grab my purse out of the opposite side of the car.

 

If I'm not in the car, my keys are with me. That is the easiest way to make sure no one steals your car. I lock the car and keep the keys in my pocket while pumping gas.

[rebeccabillington]

for stuff like using an ATM etc, yes i would do it, but nit if it was hot

[Heidi]

Yes.

[MrsMe]

Nope.

[Amy in NH]

Yes.

 

You should have made it a poll.

[May]

Yes and probably did when dds were younger.

[Nestof3]

Question. For those of you who won't leave a child unattended, can you clarify age limits?

 

Also, what do you do when all of the kids are buckled in and you forget your __________ from the house? Do you unbuckle everyone, bring them all inside, and then do it all over again?

[Paige]

I always lock my car and hold the keys with me while pumping gas so no one tries to grab my purse out of the opposite side of the car.

 

I always unlock my doors when pumping gas so I could get the kids out in case of an explosion or fire.

[Joyofsixreboot]

Yes

[KristinaBreece]

Question. For those of you who won't leave a child unattended, can you clarify age limits?

 

Also, what do you do when all of the kids are buckled in and you forget your __________ from the house? Do you unbuckle everyone, bring them all inside, and then do it all over again?

 

At 2 & 4, I am ok with leaving my DC in our car to run back in the house and grab... my phone, or whatever. I implicitly trust my neighbors (I grew up in this neighborhood & have known all of them since birth), and I know that at least one of them is always watching the activity on our street. Nosy? Sure. But it can be reassuring at times.

[phathui5]

Yes I would.

[Daisy]

15ft away? Probably. But no way would I step out of sight as that is illegal in CA.

 

It is illegal to leave a child under the age of 6yo in a car unattended for more than 60 seconds. Yep, more than one minute. The only exception is if they are being supervised by a child who is older than 12yrs of age.

[mirth]

For everyone who said yes, would it be okay if someone you are paying to watch your 5yo did the same thing?

 

This can be interpreted as either (a) a pot-stirring question [which I don't mean but recognize it may be anyway so let me apologize in advance], or (b) an acknowledgement that some people may expect more of others than of themselves or © all of parenting is a compromise.

[T'smom]

The sweater story has me LOL! We have friends that were missionaries in Peru- when they had a baby, the mom told me they couldn't walk down the street without someone telling her that the baby needed more clothes on!!! Of course, being from Indiana- she felt the weather was plenty warm!

[Cricket]

For everyone who said yes, would it be okay if someone you are paying to watch your 5yo did the same thing?

 

This can be interpreted as either (a) a pot-stirring question [which I don't mean but recognize it may be anyway so let me apologize in advance], or (b) an acknowledgement that some people may expect more of others than of themselves or © all of parenting is a compromise.

 

Actually, that is an interesting twist. If the person in question was a younger teenage girl, then I would be concerned. Only because I would assume she wasn't paying attention. If the person was an experienced mom, then no it wouldn't bother me. Experienced moms have developed a special power to pay attention to more than one thing at a time. :)

[Haiku]

Of course.

 

Tara

[ByGrace3]

ok, I would NEVER leave my child in a locked car with with it off. We live in FL and it gets HOT, and like a pp said 5 min's talking can turn to 15 easily. That said, I have often left my kids in the car, while I stand outside of it talking. I always leave the car and air on, and leave the side door open so I can see them and hear them (they are all in car seats) 15 ft is not very far at all. I am further from them when I pull up at the piano teacher's house and know on the door to get dd. I would never go in, but I sit and talk at the door for a minute. I wouldn't if we were not in a safe area. I would NEVER leave them to go inside anywhere even for a minute. ANYTHING can happen. I will admit, I have wanted to call child services plenty of times when I see small children in a car alone. It makes me angry, and I have been known to sit there until the parents come out, just to be sure the kids are ok.

 

ETA: I won't leave my lo's in the car to go across the parking lot to put a cart back. I wouldn't be 15 ft away unless there was a direct line btwn me and them, and I could see them the entire time.

Edited March 6, 2011 by ByGrace3

[Word Nerd]

For everyone who said yes, would it be okay if someone you are paying to watch your 5yo did the same thing?

 

This can be interpreted as either (a) a pot-stirring question [which I don't mean but recognize it may be anyway so let me apologize in advance], or (b) an acknowledgement that some people may expect more of others than of themselves or © all of parenting is a compromise.

 

Still yes. If I couldn't trust the person to keep an eye on my kids in that situation, which is not any more risky than situations kids are in all the time in daily life, then why am I hiring her/him to watch my kids at all?