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A rather un pc rant about conventions


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I just told dh I may be going to Cali in September. He said :001_huh: "Okkkaayyyy". I then tried to explain the Homeschool Festivus Convention...after about 3 sentences he said "It sounds great, honey, I'm going to bed now". :lol::lol:

 

I guess that means I can go?!

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I should have read the recent thread posts before adding my too serious comments. Festivus? To heck with beach traffic, I'm in. Dh will brign all takers fishing if we meet in NE. We are still offering lobster.

 

Lobster and fishing and beach?! Dh would love to attend your dh's session on current events. He's truly enjoying your dh's book and was shocked when I showed him the autograph! Biggest hit of Christmas!

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I was thinking that it sounded like Deadheads doing concert roadtrips, but Fight Club works too.

 

There could be tie dye conference shirts.

:lol:

 

 

Whisky and home brew, this sounds like the best home-convention ever

 

 

Whisky, blech. But, I'll bring Fat Squirrel! :D

 

And, yes, this will be a convention that dh and I are both interested in! I'll book the grandparents tomorrow!!! :)

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Virgin America and Jet Blue fly into San Francisco and you can take the BART subway from there over to Richmond and then Amtrak up to Sacramento. It's a bit convoluted but something to look into to potentially save money.

Checked--much, much farther away. I will probably have to settle with seeing SWB at the Midwest convention in Cincinnati.

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I love Austin.

 

But am already in TX once this year...how far west would the TX people be willing to come?

 

Maybe contributions could be prorated by distance from the Festivus site.

 

In case anyone is wondering, Maryland is playing UNC and my DH and DS14 and niece are making so much noise that I'm killing time on the boards until normal life resume.

 

Oh please come to Austin!! Please? Pretty please? With a cherry on top???

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It's probably because I've been in bed sick for four days, but now I am envisioning a WTM fight club.

 

The first rule about Homeschool Festivus is that you don't talk about Homeschool Festivus. We'll just walk around with chocolate on our face, our messed up hair from staying up too late, our matching bee tatoos, and our worn out freshly autographed copies of WTM. We won't have to say a word, we'll just nod and know, we've been a part of Homeschool Festivus. :D

 

 

 

 

So, since it's Festivus do we start with the Airing of Grievances or just go straight to the eating?! :tongue_smilie:

 

 

 

but Roswell, NM sure sounds like the perfect locale for a bunch of tinfoil hat wearing clandestine homeschool festivus folks to meet up.

 

 

I have no idea what shad planking is.

I asked dh and he said it sounded kinky.

I said no, it's something politics related.

Dh just laughed and said that's what he said.;)

Off to google and hoping no weird pictures pop up...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

OMG These had me literally laughing out loud!!:D

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For us, it is all about drive time/cost. In September I will have a 3 month old baby in tow too. So ideally, within an 8 hour drive of here.

 

Looking at a map. I don't know if I could make it, but Roswell, NM sure sounds like the perfect locale for a bunch of tinfoil hat wearing clandestine homeschool festivus folks to meet up.

 

Roswell would be great. :lol::lol: They're probably used to weird people showing up in town.

 

Can you imagine if an "alien ship" crashed while we were all there?

 

It'd be like the lightbulb joke.

 

20% homeschoolers taking samples of the crash

40% homeschoolers inviting the injured alien to their house for cultural studies

14% homeschoolers attempting to study the biology of the alien while 31% homeschoolers bandage up the poor guy. Meanwhile 7 other homeschoolers are too squeamish to get near the alien because he's bleeding, at least they think it's blood.

5% homeschoolers deny the existence of the alien, while 11% more believe he is just part of a government cover up.

All of the homeschoolers in attendance try to speak to the alien, 97% of them in Latin. The other 3% start creating a matrix to understand the grammar of the alien's own language.

41% of them pull out a star chart and try to figure out the distance he has traveled. Those that use Singapore attempt to put that into a bar graph. Those that use LOF try to make a story with it involving pizza and poker night.

The 3% that were creating the grammar matrix now start work on transcribing it into written language, while another 2% attempt to diagram the language.

 

Meanwhile the backup alien ship comes and brings the alien back on board with a laser type transporter (of which 37% of homeschoolers are photographing with their cell phones). The alien gets back on board and they ask how he is. He states he is fine, shakes his head, and immediately states that homeschoolers are weird.

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Roswell would be great. :lol::lol: They're probably used to weird people showing up in town.

 

Can you imagine if an "alien ship" crashed while we were all there?

 

It'd be like the lightbulb joke.

 

20% homeschoolers taking samples of the crash

40% homeschoolers inviting the injured alien to their house for cultural studies

14% homeschoolers attempting to study the biology of the alien while 31% homeschoolers bandage up the poor guy. Meanwhile 7 other homeschoolers are too squeamish to get near the alien because he's bleeding, at least they think it's blood.

5% homeschoolers deny the existence of the alien, while 11% more believe he is just part of a government cover up.

All of the homeschoolers in attendance try to speak to the alien, 97% of them

in Latin. The other 3% start creating a matrix to understand the grammar of the alien's own language.

41% of them pull out a star chart and try to figure out the distance he has traveled. Those that use Singapore attempt to put that into a bar graph. Those that use LOF try to make a story with it involving pizza and poker night.

The 3% that were creating the grammar matrix now start work on transcribing it into written language, while another 2% attempt to diagram the language.

 

Meanwhile the backup alien ship comes and brings the alien back on board

with a laser type transporter (of which 37% of homeschoolers are photographing with their cell phones). The alien gets back on board and they ask how he is. He states he is fine, shakes his head, and immediately states that homeschoolers are weird.

 

:smilielol5:

 

Exactly what I was picturing!:D

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Roswell would be great. :lol::lol: They're probably used to weird people showing up in town.

 

Can you imagine if an "alien ship" crashed while we were all there?

 

It'd be like the lightbulb joke.

 

20% homeschoolers taking samples of the crash

40% homeschoolers inviting the injured alien to their house for cultural studies

14% homeschoolers attempting to study the biology of the alien while 31% homeschoolers bandage up the poor guy. Meanwhile 7 other homeschoolers are too squeamish to get near the alien because he's bleeding, at least they think it's blood.

5% homeschoolers deny the existence of the alien, while 11% more believe he is just part of a government cover up.

All of the homeschoolers in attendance try to speak to the alien, 97% of them in Latin. The other 3% start creating a matrix to understand the grammar of the alien's own language.

41% of them pull out a star chart and try to figure out the distance he has traveled. Those that use Singapore attempt to put that into a bar graph. Those that use LOF try to make a story with it involving pizza and poker night.

The 3% that were creating the grammar matrix now start work on transcribing it into written language, while another 2% attempt to diagram the language.

 

Meanwhile the backup alien ship comes and brings the alien back on board with a laser type transporter (of which 37% of homeschoolers are photographing with their cell phones). The alien gets back on board and they ask how he is. He states he is fine, shakes his head, and immediately states that homeschoolers are weird.

 

 

:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

 

 

 

Wait a sec...I think I resemble that...:tongue_smilie:

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How I long for a home school convention sans the propaganda and actually about *gasp* academics. I think purity rings are somewhere between stupid and creepy. Neither Rob nor I have any desire for me to be a meek and quiet wife. (Thank goodness! LOL) I think real boyhood is more than learning to be a good provider. I think Hank the Cowdog should be put down -seriously that dog is horribly behaved! And hearing a couple expound on their research into how effective home schooling is, is not particularly helpful in practical applications. Though I'm sure it is temporarily inspiring to hear that if we just relax and leave the kids to their own devices and raise them to be Godly - that everything else will fall into place. And if it doesn't, well at least they aren't having sex at the public school.

 

What I wouldn't give for actual academic discussion of options and how to apply them in our homes. All the rhetoric about how to raise our sons to be manly providers and our daughters to be pure is not very helpful when it comes to teaching actual religion, algebra, dissections, or how to write a coherent 5 paragraph essay with end notes and bibliography.

 

It perpetuates a stereotype that most home schoolers don't fit (IME) or want to fit and excuses poor education in the name of being a better Christian, which I personally find insulting.

 

I probably shouldn't hit post. Feel free to ignore. I will go to the convention tho I won't attend a single speaker. I just want the free shipping and instant gratification of my vendor purchases.;)

 

:iagree: :lol: I hope this tread is still open when I wake up in the morning. I would love to read all the responses. I can't attend the "conservative" homeschool conventions anymore, you know the ones I'm talking about. But, I do like the more moderate one that comes to town later in the season, and I hope SWB can make it this year. :D

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In CA we have several choices.

 

We have a secular state conference that is mostly unschooling-oriented.

 

We have a VERY conservative Christian conference in Modesto that sounds like the rest of this thread.

 

We have a slightly less conservative Christian conference in Santa Clara that is pretty academically responsible, and encourages full on homeschooling through high school. Last time I went to that one was two or three years ago, and they had a lot of vendors including TOG, Apologia, Exploration Education, Rod and Staff, the Quine materials, and many others. Conspicuously missing were Rainbow Resources, the Real Science 4 Kids folks, and Sonlight. I have no idea whether there was controversy over those or not. I didn't hear of any dust ups like at the CHEC conference some years back.

 

Anyway, I never went to any of these until I was well along in homeschooling years, and I still have only been to the third of them. But a few years back a classical Christian coop up in the Roseville/Sacramento area invited SWB to come and speak and organized the very first conference I ever attended. It was small but perfectly targetted to me. SWB spoke four or five times in a day and a half. PHP had a big table full of their own publications and some of their recommendations for sale. And a local Christian-friendly homeschooling store had a big room full of things for sale as well--I had not even know that they existed, and they had wonderful stuff! I was able to see the Omnibus books and peruse them in detail (which saved me from buying them and then deciding not to use them). I got to see much of the WTM recommended high school history material, and purchase more of it than I would care to admit. I also bought a ton of living books and a few hands on kits and games from the store.

 

This was the perfect conference for me, until I attended the anniversary conference in 2009--wow, that was epic. SWB, Jim Weiss, JW, just a few vendors but they were the ones I really wanted...perfect perfect perfect. There need to be more of those. Take that show on the road!

 

Thanks for posting this Carol - I have gone to the first un-schooling conference and it was not helpful (the kids loved it though). Maybe I will try the Santa Clara conference though I am a secular homeschooler.

 

Oh, and I was at the Roseville event with SWB, that was fabulous! I went and stayed overnight by myself, well worth it!

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People, people, people.

 

How about Las Vegas?

 

It is out west. Has plenty of hotels. And southwest definitely flies there.

 

Plus, I live in Vegas.:D

 

Besides, by Sept my DH will be in a war zone (for a year) and I think SWB would be doing her patriotic duty by bringing the Festivus here.:lol:

 

Just my 2 cents worth.

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Having never read them (my boys are older, so I only heard about them here), I had no idea Hank the Cowdog was Christian! ;)

 

 

 

We love Hank the Cowdog because they're funny. My atheist mom introduced me to them. Pretty tame stuff, but I just happened to notice recently how much he insults Drover, as my kids began to call each other names when "playing Hank". Egad! Nothin' like being told "Shut yer trap ya stub-tailed pipsqueak" by a 6yo!:lol:

 

Lakota

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Roswell would be great. :lol::lol: They're probably used to weird people showing up in town.

 

Can you imagine if an "alien ship" crashed while we were all there?

 

It'd be like the lightbulb joke.

 

20% homeschoolers taking samples of the crash

40% homeschoolers inviting the injured alien to their house for cultural studies

14% homeschoolers attempting to study the biology of the alien while 31% homeschoolers bandage up the poor guy. Meanwhile 7 other homeschoolers are too squeamish to get near the alien because he's bleeding, at least they think it's blood.

5% homeschoolers deny the existence of the alien, while 11% more believe he is just part of a government cover up.

All of the homeschoolers in attendance try to speak to the alien, 97% of them in Latin. The other 3% start creating a matrix to understand the grammar of the alien's own language.

41% of them pull out a star chart and try to figure out the distance he has traveled. Those that use Singapore attempt to put that into a bar graph. Those that use LOF try to make a story with it involving pizza and poker night.

The 3% that were creating the grammar matrix now start work on transcribing it into written language, while another 2% attempt to diagram the language.

 

Meanwhile the backup alien ship comes and brings the alien back on board with a laser type transporter (of which 37% of homeschoolers are photographing with their cell phones). The alien gets back on board and they ask how he is. He states he is fine, shakes his head, and immediately states that homeschoolers are weird.

 

:lol::lol::lol:

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How many secular homeschooling or academic homeschooling, or classical homeschooling and don't want to go to a conference in order to hash out religion, homeschoolers are on this board and in the Midwest?

 

I propose that we all descend on a centrally located hotel :auto: and commiserate together. Maybe SWB will come talk to us!!! :D:D:D :bigear:

 

I promise to bring my mother in law's, TO DIE FOR, rum cake with rum frosting, I volunteer my friend (aren't I such a lovely BF?) to bring her heavenly peanut butter pie with whipped cream, someone else can bring the Godiva Double Chocolate Cheesecake, and we'll force SPYCAR to fly in from California and make Ethiopian food! We'll consume every carmel or mocha latte in the area.

 

:001_smile:Faith

 

What an lovely idea!!!! Of course I won't be in the midwest but a few more months, but I am game.

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Roswell would be great. :lol::lol: They're probably used to weird people showing up in town.

 

Can you imagine if an "alien ship" crashed while we were all there?

 

It'd be like the lightbulb joke.

 

20% homeschoolers taking samples of the crash

40% homeschoolers inviting the injured alien to their house for cultural studies

14% homeschoolers attempting to study the biology of the alien while 31% homeschoolers bandage up the poor guy. Meanwhile 7 other homeschoolers are too squeamish to get near the alien because he's bleeding, at least they think it's blood.

5% homeschoolers deny the existence of the alien, while 11% more believe he is just part of a government cover up.

All of the homeschoolers in attendance try to speak to the alien, 97% of them in Latin. The other 3% start creating a matrix to understand the grammar of the alien's own language.

41% of them pull out a star chart and try to figure out the distance he has traveled. Those that use Singapore attempt to put that into a bar graph. Those that use LOF try to make a story with it involving pizza and poker night.

The 3% that were creating the grammar matrix now start work on transcribing it into written language, while another 2% attempt to diagram the language.

 

Meanwhile the backup alien ship comes and brings the alien back on board with a laser type transporter (of which 37% of homeschoolers are photographing with their cell phones). The alien gets back on board and they ask how he is. He states he is fine, shakes his head, and immediately states that homeschoolers are weird.

 

:rofl::smilielol5::thumbup: All sounds like a fun convention to me!!!!

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People, people, people.

 

How about Las Vegas?

 

It is out west. Has plenty of hotels. And southwest definitely flies there.

 

Plus, I live in Vegas.:D

 

Besides, by Sept my DH will be in a war zone (for a year) and I think SWB would be doing her patriotic duty by bringing the Festivus here.:lol:

 

Just my 2 cents worth.

 

 

Works for me, and we can try a hand at the slot machines.

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I'm planning on attending a convention this spring, here in Minnesota. But only because my mom lives about five minutes away from the venue, so I'd be making a trip up there anyway, and I can get into the convention for free. Otherwise, not a chance I'd go.

 

It's supposed to be primarily religious, but with some secular vendors, from what I've heard. I'm a little afraid- can you imagine me, with my pentacle necklace and my tattoos and my decidedly hippie-ish wardrobe, walking in among all the long skirts and meekeness? I'm worried someone will try to hold me down and pray the demons out. :D Should be quite an experience. Luckily, I've never been one to worry about being stared at.

 

I think the MACHE conference is much better than what people here are sharing. They certainly have their parenting/marriage type workshops that I tend to avoid, but they have also had some marvelous academic workshops over the years that have been well worth attending. I'd also say women in pants is more the norm than the oddity there. If you like to shop used books-they have a lot of hsers selling used stuff. Usually come across some good/great finds. I think there are some great workshops there this year I'd love to hear, but alas, it's almost 6 hours away and too much money.

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How I long for a home school convention sans the propaganda and actually about *gasp* academics. I think purity rings are somewhere between stupid and creepy. Neither Rob nor I have any desire for me to be a meek and quiet wife. (Thank goodness! LOL) I think real boyhood is more than learning to be a good provider. I think Hank the Cowdog should be put down -seriously that dog is horribly behaved! And hearing a couple expound on their research into how effective home schooling is, is not particularly helpful in practical applications. Though I'm sure it is temporarily inspiring to hear that if we just relax and leave the kids to their own devices and raise them to be Godly - that everything else will fall into place. And if it doesn't, well at least they aren't having sex at the public school.

 

What I wouldn't give for actual academic discussion of options and how to apply them in our homes. All the rhetoric about how to raise our sons to be manly providers and our daughters to be pure is not very helpful when it comes to teaching actual religion, algebra, dissections, or how to write a coherent 5 paragraph essay with end notes and bibliography.

 

It perpetuates a stereotype that most home schoolers don't fit (IME) or want to fit and excuses poor education in the name of being a better Christian, which I personally find insulting.

 

I probably shouldn't hit post. Feel free to ignore. I will go to the convention tho I won't attend a single speaker. I just want the free shipping and instant gratification of my vendor purchases.;)

 

Yep! :iagree:

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I only went to one conference. After sitting through the keynote speech on discipline in the home school, which included discussions of exactly what kind of whip to beat your children with, and how worthwhile it is to carry on beating while your child begs for mercy, I knew I was in the wrong place.

 

Laura

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Martha, you are nothing short of a REVOLUTIONARY!!! Look what you've started with this thread!!!

 

You are an amazing woman! It truly hope that you will always use your powers for good and not evil! :lol:

 

Wow! I thought for sure this thread would be deleted since she labeled others' choice of purity teaching as "between stupid and creepy"! These forums never cease to amaze me!

 

ETA: I guess I would like to say that a point could be made about wanting more academic offerings at HS conventions without poking fun at what others believe (or rehashing all the convention horror stories). Personally, I would rather have a child who demonstrates Godly character traits and doesn't grasp how to find the volume of a cone, than a genius who is a brute beast in society. But it sounds like this thread is getting around to doing instead of just ranting, so that's a good thing.

 

Donna

 

Be humble

Post your opinions and your experiences, but remember that other families may have different experiences than yours and may reason their way with impeccable logic to different conclusions.

Edited by dmmosher
clarity
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NO! Not the feats of strength! Please no!:lol::lol:

 

I'm waiting for the festivus dinner where we tell each other how annoyed we have been at each other's postings over the prior year. That would be awesome!! :D

 

"I've got real issues with all of you!"

 

And who is the board Kramer? I intend to just sit in a corner and watch that person.

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I would love a conference like the PA one! Our big one is in Orlando and we do have a lot of good vendors, but the speakers...not so much. The only talks I have benefited from were the ones about programs I wanted to check out - and I have always decided NOT to get them after listening to the vendor presentations. And ours doesn't sound NEARLY as conservative as some of the ones mentioned here.

 

For someone like me, the convention in Orlando is way way way too conservative. In fact, that convention is what I'm basing my "hs conventions are too conservative" views on.

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Does it have to be either/or?

 

Of course, not. But, that's not my main point. Everyone is welcomed to HS their dc the way they see fit, no? Why the need to dig up all the horrible experiences? Why poke fun at things that other families may consider educational and also complain that there aren't any places to go when there are places like these forums?!

 

I think if someone went to Homeschool Festivus and then came on this board and poked fun at what was offered (offered, not forced on anyone), I don't think the thread would be received well (nor should it).

 

What do you think?

 

Donna

 

Be humble

Post your opinions and your experiences, but remember that other families may have different experiences than yours and may reason their way with impeccable logic to different conclusions.

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Wow! I thought for sure this thread would be deleted since she labeled others' choice of purity teaching as "between stupid and creepy"! These forums never cease to amaze me!

 

ETA: I guess I would like to say that a point could be made about wanting more academic offerings at HS conventions without poking fun at what others believe (or rehashing all the convention horror stories). Personally, I would rather have a child who demonstrates Godly character traits and doesn't grasp how to find the volume of a cone, than a genius who is a brute beast in society.

 

I took the post to refer to the content of conference workshop presentations, which surely is up for discussion on a board like this. But Donna's reminder is timely; we should be able to talk about what we'd like to have at conventions without bashing those who want something different.

 

PLEASE let's not derail this thread into a discussion of the above. Go back to talking about Festivus.

 

SWB

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I've never been to one either, but I am going for the first time in June! I'm going to the Northeast HS Convention in Valley Forge, PA.

 

:seeya: We're going to this one, too! See you there!

 

We decided to go because there seem to be some decent academically-oriented offerings. Otherwise, no thanks. I've already got my worldview, TYVM. :glare:

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Yes, please!!! I'm sure my dh (chemistry instructor) would be willing to do a workshop on his subject.

Here's my dream conference: mainly secular (evolution, please!), hard-core academics, gifted kids, writing, math for geniuses taught by non-geniuses, a little seminar on how to keep sane, something about toddlers, talks on progressive "no-hitting children" parenting, writing, writing, writing; something about putting fun into homeschooling for the overly-serious types, foreign languages, long-range thinking about college.

 

We could have it here in coastal NE. People could camp in my yard. we could all eat lobsters, swim in our little lake, take a surfing lesson.

 

Alternately we could all give talks on what we do/know best, even if it has nothing to do with homeschooling. My DH could explain world events of the last decade, and tell you everything you (n)ever wanted to know about journalism. I could give an advanced seminar in how to avoid beach traffic.

 

Seriously, I'd love a (mainly) secular but academic (no tie-dying) homeschooling convention that focused on the practical, not the political.

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