We are on the edge. Please help if you can

[Janna]

It has been TWO WEEKS since my ds (7 mos) has slept. Dh and I are wound very, very tight. Just now, dh tells me he's "this close to having a nervous breakdown." Dramatic? Yes. But he's definitely letting me know that if he doesn't get some peace soon, he's gonna snap. The problem is, I'm feeling the exact same way!

 

Here's the deal. Two weeks ago, ds stopped sleeping -naps and at night. He was fine during the day. No fever. I let it go for about 9 days but it wasn't getting any better so I took him in to the Dr. (on the last day we had ins. coverage since dh's job loss). Turns out, he had an ear infection. She put him on amoxicilin. This was on New Years Eve.

 

I am assuming that his ear is better, but now he has a major cold. He can't breath, his nose is a faucet, but doesn't aspirate well because everything is *up* in his head. His nose appears to be clear, but is just running, running, running, Kwim? And yet, he can't breath. I don't know how else to explain it. When he wakes up, his nose is crusty where it has all dried. It doesn't seem like it should be a big deal, but it is because it's preventing him from sleeping.

 

He goes to bed fine - but won't sleep for more than 2 hours at a time. His morning nap he'll sleep an hour, his afternoon nap is sporadic, sometimes sleeping 2 hours again (but it takes some doing to get him to sleep and it seems a restless one most days) and then at night he begs to go down, but it's every 2 hours he's up, all night long. For weeks. And the crying! It's almost constant. It used to be only when we would put him to bed, but since the cold, he's very moody even when he's up. Over the last 3 days, knowing that his ear had to be better, we started letting him cry himself to sleep, thinking that maybe he had gotten used to being held and rocked and was now in a bad habit. But he will cry and not stop for an hour. And even then, it's not like he's gone to sleep. He is just worn out enough to only whimper. And honestly, it's worked better doing this during the day. At night, because he sleeps in our room (he can't be moved currently), it is much harder to let him cry for an hour or more. But I'm beginning to think we need to.

 

My house is a mess, dh and I can't think straight because it's not like we're napping when he naps - we have other dc, dh is job searching....There is no routine anymore, when two weeks ago there was. This has been dh's *entire* time home since being let go. Literally, it started the first night he was no longer working.

 

It's not a big deal. We know that. It's a cold. It's temporary. We *know* that, but you know how hard it is to *cope* when you're so dead tired, right?

 

Middle ds's b-day is tomorrow. I don't even have a cake started, or one ordered if we choose to go that route. I don't have gifts wrapped. There is no plan for what to do with him tomorrow, and whatever it is, baby and I won't be able to be a part of it.

 

I'm just done, you know? Is there *anything* we can do for baby? I know that decongestants are no longer recommended, but honestly, I wouldn't give him any of those anyway because they never work at this age. We have a whole house humidifier. You'd think with all the homemade fruit and veggies he eats that I froze from the summer, he wouldn't be this sick for this long!

 

Ack! help, if you can! (how's that for desperation?)

[RoughCollie]

You are overwhelmed, and no wonder. I remember those days all too well.

 

I advise you to call your pediatrician, just to be sure that everything is okay medically and that there is no solution to this problem.

 

Does he have a fever?

 

It seems normal to me that he cries, especially since he is sick and miserable. I would not let him cry it out, if possible, at his age especially.

 

Do you have any friends or family nearby who can help you? This is the time for a distress call!

Edited January 5, 2009 by RoughCollie

[Perry]

I wouldn't assume his ear is better. He may have something that isn't treated by amoxicillin. I'd take him for a recheck. Also, are you giving him ibuprofen? If not, I'd definitely add that.

 

Sorry.

[periwinkle]

 

I am assuming that his ear is better, but now he has a major cold.

 

I'm not sure that I would assume that. Has he had an ear check?

[Perry]

Also, have you looked into Hoosier healthcare?

[Lisa R.]

I know this would be hard if you're sleep deprived, but it could contribute to a baby that has difficulties sleeping.

 

I'm sorry you're going through this. It's just a stage and will be over. Repeat this over and over.

 

Really, you have my sympathies.

[Tree House Academy]

You definitely need to take him back to the doctor. Something is going on. His little body doesn't need to miss that much sleep either. :(

[hornblower]

Are you sleeping when he sleeps? Honestly, when you said he doesn't sleep at all I thought you meant AT ALL.

 

I don't think either of my kids slept for more than 2h at a time until they were past 2 yo...... the key is to sleep and nap when baby sleeps.

 

I would suggest you and your dh each take a 6h shift looking after the baby. During that 6h, the other person gets to sleep uninterrupted. Camp on the living room floor if you need to, put in earplugs and sleep. During that 12h total, your other kids might be up at some point but you just have the 'up' parent explain to them they need to be quiet. Let them watch tv quietly, or maybe take them out for a walk - maybe a walk would do everyone good, including the baby if dressed warmly.

 

Do have a dr. recheck the baby. If this cold is dragging on so long it may be something more.

 

Also, I find it suggestive that this has been an issue since your dh has been home. I'd consider strongly whether the tension in you both is feeding this situation. Babies are very good at sensing stress and worry and it does affect them very much. And it's easy to 'blame' the baby for the 'nervous breakdown' but it's just as likely to be job/money/economy stress ..... Try to find some time to relax, practice smiling, maybe write down some good things about your life to remind yourselves about what's going right....

 

good luck!

[Jami]

I know you're not nursing, but would he sleep if you took him to bed with you. Or do you have a recliner where you can rock and doze yourself? Co-sleeping just saved my life with babies who were sick, teething, restless and needed more touch during the night. :( He may get used to it, sure, but then when he's past this you can work on sleep training again. But then at least you'll be rested for that task.

[Parrothead]

What is he doing when he is awake? If he is screaming the whole time I can see why both of you are going sleepless. If he isn't screaming you guys gotta take turns with him. You stay up with him one night and let dh get some sleep. The next night dh should let you sleep while he is up with the baby.

 

I also agree with the others that he needs to go back to the doc for a recheck. I know doctor visits are expensive without insurance, but the price of a visit will probably be worth getting some sleep.

 

Have you tried letting him sleep in his carseat? Bring it inside. Sometimes sitting up helps with the drainage and may let him sleep longer.

[King Alfred Academy]

:grouphug: I have no advice to offer but a virtual hug. Sounds like your family is going through some really rough times. I hope you all will get some sleep soon and that you dh will find a job quickly. :grouphug:

[Janna]

I advise you to call your pediatrician, just to be sure that everything is okay medically and that there is no solution to this problem.

 

I will if necessary, but I guess I have just thought that if he's on amoxicilin already than anything else going on is viral and will just take time. I'm just befuddled at the amount of time it's taking...

 

Does he have a fever?

 

No, he has never had one.

 

It seems normal to me that he cries, especially since he is sick and miserable. I would not let him cry it out, if possible, at his age especially.

 

I know, and it's hard, believe me! We go in periodically to console him, but we aren't getting him out of bed and bringing him out to where the rest of us are while we rock him, kwim? We're letting him know that he needs to take this nap thing *in his crib* seriously. I *hate* letting him cry.

 

Do you have any friends or family nearby who can help you? This is the time for a distress call!

 

Waaaa!! We are completely alone. Nearest family is two states away. All of the friends that I would trust all work full time and during the day is when I could use some assistance.

 

I wouldn't assume his ear is better. He may have something that isn't treated by amoxicillin. I'd take him for a recheck. Also, are you giving him ibuprofen? If not, I'd definitely add that.

 

 

See above for why I have hesitated in taking him back. Yes, I bought ibuprofin on New Year's Eve after Tylenol wasn't working.

 

Also, have you looked into Hoosier healthcare?

 

No, not yet. We're not too concerned about the medical ins. I mean, we are to an extent, but not to the point where we are looking into that while we're tired, frustrated and it has been the holidays. I know our family Dr. personally and she is willing to work with us if we needed to bring him in when we are uninsured.

[LaxMom]

I really do not like pharmaceuticals. That said, Little Noses decongestant drops (nose drops, like Afrin) were a godsend in times like this, when my boys were little. Herbs for Kids' Willow-Garlic ear oil drops can help, as well, if he still has ear pain / blockage, as long as there is no fever (willow contains salicylates, so should be avoided like aspirin if there is fever).

 

Is it possible he is also cutting upper teeth? That will affect the sinuses, making his nose run, which in turn can cause his eustachian tubes to be blocked which, of course, is why small children are so much more prone to ear infections than grown ups.

 

I am surprised your pediatrician prescribed antibiotics (no, I'm not). The AAP recognizes that the vast majority of ear infections clear on their own and that giving antibiotics tends to cause recurrance at a much higher rate than letting the body take care of it naturally.

 

I can completely sympathize with the sleep deprivation. We didn't sleep for more than 2 hours at a time for the first 2 1/2 years with the boys. :grouphug: Remember: this is a phase. It will pass. Take a nap, doze on the couch while he plays in the room, sleep in shifts, whatever it takes so you grown-ups can function.

[LisaKinVA]

Here are some suggestions...

 

1. Before going to bed, take a warm shower with him. The baby doesn't need the heat of the water (which may help relax you), but the steam will allow for a lot of drainage and clearing of the nasal passages, and help him relax.

 

2. Vicks (they make a baby version too).

 

3. Warm mist humidifier close to where he is sleeping. It will help keep the mucous thinner, and drainage easier.

 

4. Sleeping wedge... so that the baby can sleep more in a reclined position, again helps with drainage.

 

5. Snuggle with him. As has been suggested, honestly, it's better to get some sleep and break the sleep together when the baby is well than trying to be "tough" when he's sick. If you have a recliner, sleep with him in it. Your warmth will comfort him, and the recline will help keep things drained.

 

The other suggestions are very good as well (taking shifts, sleeping whenever one of you can.)

 

I know this is difficult, especially with other children -- a birthday. Plan the "party" for the weekend, to give everyone a bit more time. Do something little for the actual day... maybe a note and a small gift. "Wrap" the presents in gift bags. Try to keep things as simple as possible.

 

Best wishes...

[hsmommyx3]

My ds had one ear infection after another & that was 10 years ago when they would try EVERYTHING before doing tubes. He wouldn't sleep for more than a couple hours at a time. My doctor told me to put him in his baby swing next to my bed so he's propped up. IT WORKED! I had to stock lots of batteries but it was worth the sleep until he got over the infection.

 

Good Luck!

[Whisperlily]

:grouphug:

 

Oh how I remember those days!

 

My poor little second child had ear infections repeatedly. Unfortunately not all ear infections are created equal. His would not go away on their own, and not all antibiotics worked for him. I would contact the nurse at the clinic/office and ask if they think he needs to be rechecked. We had to switch antibiotics for more than one ear infection.

 

Ibuprofen helped, tylenol seemed to do nothing for his pain. Two hours at a time sounds pretty classic for an ear infection.

 

Have you tried suction (bulb syringe) to help clear his sinuses?

 

I sure hope you get some sleep... I agree with the poster who said to switch off and take care of him in shifts. (((hugs)))

[Janna]

Are you sleeping when he sleeps? Honestly, when you said he doesn't sleep at all I thought you meant AT ALL.

 

I don't think either of my kids slept for more than 2h at a time until they were past 2 yo...... the key is to sleep and nap when baby sleeps.

 

For us, it is at all. I mean, I have trained all of my dc to sleep on their own and for normal lengths of time from the beginning. My other 2 dc were NEVER like this, even when they were sick.

 

I would suggest you and your dh each take a 6h shift looking after the baby. During that 6h, the other person gets to sleep uninterrupted. Camp on the living room floor if you need to, put in earplugs and sleep. During that 12h total, your other kids might be up at some point but you just have the 'up' parent explain to them they need to be quiet. Let them watch tv quietly, or maybe take them out for a walk - maybe a walk would do everyone good, including the baby if dressed warmly.

 

This is easier said than done. There are responsibilities that prevent this from happening, you know? We have definitely helped each other out and taken turns with who is up with him etc. It's not like we're not helping each other. And our other two kids have been wonderful and extremely understanding. It's nice that they've been on "break" too, but it's time to start again, you know? We are just in need of some order and routine around here! It's how we function best, anyway.

 

Do have a dr. recheck the baby. If this cold is dragging on so long it may be something more.

I commented on this in Perry's post

 

Also, I find it suggestive that this has been an issue since your dh has been home. I'd consider strongly whether the tension in you both is feeding this situation. Babies are very good at sensing stress and worry and it does affect them very much. And it's easy to 'blame' the baby for the 'nervous breakdown' but it's just as likely to be job/money/economy stress ..... Try to find some time to relax, practice smiling, maybe write down some good things about your life to remind yourselves about what's going right....

 

good luck!

 

I understand what you're saying and the Dr. eluded to this when I brought him in on New Years Eve. But honestly, we're not stressed about the job loss! I mean that whole heartedly. We had a job loss 5 years ago that ripped us to shreds, lying in crater at the bottom of the sea. Seriously, it was bad and we almost divorced to be honest. But through that experience, we grew enormously -both of us - in our relationship with the Lord. We discovered who we *really* put our trust in and the Lord delivered us. He delivered us in such a miraculous, beautiful way, that this time around, we are truly *excited* about what He's gonna do next! Our marriage is the strongest it has ever been (which is saying something!) and we're just *trusting*. Honestly, we are not stressed out. We would be no different from the Israelites if we didn't trust the Lord to work this situation out for us. Both job loss times have been in situations where the companies disolved. Not because of my dh. It's not coincidence, you know?

 

The only tension going on right now, is honestly from lack of sleep, lack of routine, and having a crying baby.

[Janna]

No, I'm not nursing. Good suggestion, though, if I were!

 

Thanks for the sympathy!

[Doran]

Have I ever been where you are! Dd2 was a terrible sleeper, and a big screamer. It was so bad that dh, who handles lack of sleep less...erm...gracefully than I do, slept on the couch. For four months! And this was when baby girl was perfectly healthy. Colds and such? Well you can imagine. I don't tell you this to downplay what you're feeling now, but only to offer you a glimmer of hope that it will get better, you will survive, and this too shall pass.

 

You've already been given great advice here, so the following list will mostly reiterate what's been said before. But, here it is, in a handy list that you can absorb easily.

 

 

 

1. Take the little guy back to the doctor. Our girls have had ear infections that didn't respond to the initial antibiotic. He may need a different one. OH, and if it turns out he does have something else going on, DO NOT beat yourself up about it. It's all part of parenting.
   
2. Focus on what is going well, rather than on what isn't. "Wow, Tiger slept soundly for a whole two hours today, and I got a load of wash done. Hooray!" Praise your older children for their patience, and ask them to help in any way they can because Mommy and Daddy know how big and capable they are.
   
3. Sleeping in shifts is a bit like being on watch on a boat. When you're off watch, you check out. You go below, put on an eye mask and stick in your ear plugs, and you crash. Six hours (or four?) will feel a whole lot better than 2.
   
4. While I realize, fully, that the job situation is terrifying, it is also a rather twisted mixed blessing right now in that dh is home with you to help you during this time. Try to view it as such.
   
5. Do you have friends or a church member who can help at all? If so, now is the time to ask. The olders can go off and play, you and dh could slip out (or to bed) for a bit while someone else steps in to be in charge. I know you probably think no one else should have to (or could) manage the baby right now, but remember that they're at the top of their game, and they're glad to help
   
6. Have you tried raising his mattress to elevate his head a bit (no pillows in the crib, of course)? Sometimes that helps with the stuck nose goo and post nasal drip
   
7. Noise? Is there a white noise machine, small fan, or humidifier in use to help drown out other sounds?
   
8. Nasal suction? Can you extract any of the goo for him?
   
9. Diet? Is he eating solids at all, or just bottle/boob? Cow's milk products (cheese, yogurt, milk) seem to contribute to mucous production.
   
10. Forget school. Forget the messy house. Forget that this is how its been since dh came home. Sometimes, routines get all out of whack, and that's just how life is. Don't let those things add more stress to you.
    

 

 

 

I'm sorry. If I lived closer, I'd come help you.

 

Hugs!

 

 

ETA: I see that many of the suggestions offered won't work for you in one way or another, making a tough situation that much more difficult. Reading over some of your remarks, though, I had one additional thought to share. Again, I base this on my experience with dd2 in comparison to dd1. Say this to yourself until it sinks in: "This boy is not the same as his siblings and may or may not respond in similar ways to similar efforts."

 

I tried to treat dd2 like I had treated dd1 in so many ways, but she would not bend in that direction. All that ended up happening, each time, is that my stress levels would go up because I felt like I had to reinvent my parenting wheel. I'd say, "But it worked for the other one!!". Dd1 took regular, 2-4 hour naps. Dd2 slept for 30 minutes at a pop for naps, and rarely more than 2 hours between feedings at night. Dd1 would barely cry when she was sick. Dd2 cried and cried and cried with a fever of 99°. Dd1 ate long and full, emptying both breasts, and going 4 hours until the next feeding. Dd2 wanted to eat every half hour and could only nurse from one side. Dd2 slept through the night at 10 days old. Dd2 took a full year to do this. And, do you know that many of those traits still exist in my kids? It wasn't about having a spoiled baby. It was about having a child who was totally different in make up than her older sibling.

 

Best wishes, honey!

Edited January 5, 2009 by Doran

[Julie in CA]

I will if necessary, but I guess I have just thought that if he's on amoxicilin already than anything else going on is viral and will just take time. I'm just befuddled at the amount of time it's taking...

 

I would take that baby in *today* to have him checked out. Infections these days don't always clear with one course of one drug. If the ear looks ok, the doc can at least advise you about the sleeping problem. Make sure you don't downplay that when you're in the office.

 

Other than that, you've received a ton of good advice. If it's the cold/congestion that's keeping him awake, I'd try taking him for a ride in the car, get him asleep in the carseat, and then see if I could gently bring him (asleep, carseat and all) into the house so he'd be sleeping in a more upright position.

 

If you haven't tried the co-sleeping, now's definitely the time to see if it would help, especially if the doc clears the baby's health, and you suspect it might really be "spoiled-baby syndrome" causing the crying. I haven't been following what your parenting style is (sorry!), but if having children sleeping in your bed is difficult for you or dh, you can take the side off the crib, put the crib's mattress at your bed height, and push the crib right up against your side of the bed. Obviously make sure the crib cannot roll if you do this. :)

 

Also, though I understand (and agree with) your stance on not using decongestants, when my dc were little their doc advised using a little Benadryl in situations like this. It is apparently one of the most benign of the pharmaceuticals available, would not be a decongestant so much as a drying up of the runny runny nose, and would likely help him (and you) to get a little bit of sleep.

 

Don't know if you'll find any of this useful, but I'll be praying for peace in your home, and a happy little guy (big guy too!) very soon.

[Janna]

Is it possible he is also cutting upper teeth? That will affect the sinuses, making his nose run, which in turn can cause his eustachian tubes to be blocked which, of course, is why small children are so much more prone to ear infections than grown ups.

 

Teething was my first thought, two weeks ago. When i finally took him in, she looked in his mouth and we both agreed that while his lower gum is slightly swollen, there is nothing close to coming in. Upper or lower. Which is a change for me too, because my other 2 dc both had their two bottom teeth in by 7 mos. Anyway, she said (the Dr.) that it looked like it would be at least a month before he cut a tooth.

 

I am surprised your pediatrician prescribed antibiotics (no, I'm not). The AAP recognizes that the vast majority of ear infections clear on their own and that giving antibiotics tends to cause recurrance at a much higher rate than letting the body take care of it naturally.

 

The only reason she did was because he had already not been sleeping for 9 days. It wasn't clearing itself on its own in that time and she was thinking this would help move it along and enable us to begin getting some sleep. Ha!

 

I will say, that deep down, there is a part of me that wonders if I had just left it alone and not taken him in, that he *would* be better. But what can I do now? Did you see my post last night about wishing I had a "system restore" button for ME rather than my computer, LOL?

[Unicorn.]

Yes there is something you can do. First, I agree w/ taking him back in. Amoxicillin doesn't work on my dc, it could be that he still has that ear infection. Second, go buy a cool mist humidifier, NOT a warm mist, COOL. Steam from heat may temporarily feel better, but heat actually causes the mucous membranes to swell, and they close up more. Cool mist causes them to shrink, which opens up the airways, making it easier to breathe. And from our experience, using the cool mist humidifier actually has helped to dry up those runny noses! Place the humidifier slightly higher than his bed, and have the mist directed directly over his head. Also keep the door to his room closed so the humidity remains where it is needed.

 

HTH and I hope you all get some sleep soon!

Edited January 5, 2009 by Unicorn
spelling errors

[A home for their hearts]

I had a couple of babies who had a really hard time for months with stuffy noises. The only thing that helped was using a saline mist spray. You don't use it as you would in adults where you mist it in the nose, you tilt the baby back and just drop a couple of drops into their nostrils and in a few minutes, or even seconds, he'll be sneezing some of the junk out. You can even make it by using warm water and salt and the put it in a medicine dropper, here's a link on how to make it. Also try using a hot steam vaporizer in his bedroom when he is sleeping.

 

Here is a link to Dr. Sears website for info and treatment for a cold.

 

HTH!

[Melissa in FL]

It sounds like he still has the ear infection. My ds has had 5 ear infections in his life and none of them were ever cleared up with just amoxicillin, I always had to take him back for something stronger. For now, garlic drops work well. If you google it you will also see that you can make it at home with minced garlic and olive oil. We used this successfully with my dd (although she did smell enough to keep any vampires away). You might try to put some dry rice in a sock and microwave it till warm, put it against his ear while you rock him. The heat will help the pain in his ear.

 

When my little ones were sick, I would sleep with them at night in the living room. Usually I would have them on my chest in the recliner, so their noses will be less stuffy. We didn't co-sleep either, but my kids never had an issue going back into their cribs when they were feeling better. Also, I remember raising the crib on the head side for a couple of weeks so their noses would keep draining (I think we rolled up a small blanket and put under the head of the mattress so the mattress was at about a 45* angle, yes they do slowly slide down it). Since your dh is home, you'll be able to go sleep for a few hours in the morning. In our home it was always important that my dh get a good night sleep so he could function at his job, and when he's been out of work, we consider looking for a job his job. So, I would make sure dh gets sleep. Watch, my dh always went above and beyond taking care of other things in the house because he recognized how I went without sleep so his sleep was undisturbed! Forget school for the other kids right now and try to let them play computer games and watch TV (I hate to say it but with a little sick child and parents lacking sleep, I think these are life savers.)

Hope he feels better.

Melissa

[Tap]

I know it is hard with no insurance but you really need to take him back in to the doctor, there is something wrong.

 

You may want to see if there are any free, reduced cost, or sliding scale clinics in your area. There are often resources to help get children medical care even if the parents don't qualify.

 

Is there state insurance that the kids would qualify for? Even if you think dh will only be out of work for a month, it is good to get the process started and then cancel it if you don't need it. Some employer's health insurance plans, especially the dependent section, don't start for 3-6-12 months after hire.

 

 

I hope he feels better soon and that you get some sleep and your life back!

[JudoMom]

The only reason she did was because he had already not been sleeping for 9 days. It wasn't clearing itself on its own in that time and she was thinking this would help move it along and enable us to begin getting some sleep. Ha!

 

I will say, that deep down, there is a part of me that wonders if I had just left it alone and not taken him in, that he *would* be better. But what can I do now? Did you see my post last night about wishing I had a "system restore" button for ME rather than my computer, LOL?

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:, Janna.

 

There's probably as good of chance that his eardrum might have ruptured from the infection. I think after 9 days of infection, prescribing a Rx was the correct way to go.

 

Have you tried saline in his nose?

 

I wish I were closer--I'd love to give you a break so you guys could get some sleep.

 

:grouphug: and continued prayers, friend.

[Tammyla]

:grouphug::iagree: with the others.

 

1. I'd take him back to the doctor for a check.

 

2. Try sleeping in shifts even if one adult has to leave the room to get some sleep.

 

3. I'd drop the nap unless he falls asleep. (Not if he falls asleep of course, just the putting him down with crying part.) Until he is well again, I'd just allow him to get tired during the day.

 

4. Sleep when he sleeps to get through this stretch. Maybe your hubby could let you sleep during the day or vise versa. A good nap is a good thing.

 

5. For now, focus on finding rest when and where the opportunity presents itself. He may sleep better right now in different circumstances.. like next to you, propped up or so on. Once the little guy is better you can refocus your efforts. :grouphug:

[unsinkable]

Maybe his digestive tract can't handle the antibiotic and he is having cramps.

 

Maybe he is eating too many different kinds of fruits & veggies?

 

Add me to the list of moms with boys of couldn't sleep more than 2 hours at a stretch. It is sleeping, granted not what he or you are used to. :grouphug:

Edited January 5, 2009 by unsinkable
left out some words

[stripe]

Try to find a low-cost clinic and take him in. There are places around here where dr's visits cost about $50, so that may be do-able for you, I don't know if you're scared you'll be charged thousands of dollars.

 

I highly recommend sleeping with him. He is very sick and upset. I've had several years in a row of this with my child's nighttime coughing, for weeks at a time, so I know it's hard, but if he sleeps when you're around/holding him, then you'll both get *some* sleep. If you think it would help to have a different situation, try the camping in the living room idea.

[Sue G in PA]

No advice other than what you have already received, but lots of :grouphug: and prayers that he gets better soon and you and dh get some rest. It's tough. Jesse has started waking up 2-3 times each night to nurse and I'm sore and tired and miserable. It's awful. Add to that he's teething. I would try the Vicks vapor rub on his chest (it really does help!), the COOL mist vaporizer and co-sleeping w/ him. You could also try putting something under his crib mattress to elevate his head a bit. He could be allergic or sensitive to the antibiotics. One last thing I would try if you have access to a natural food store. Try the homeopathic remedy called Chamomila. It works wonders here. If you have a homeopathic dr. near you, try to get ds in to see him/her. Often times the homeopathic/natural remedies work better than antibiotics esp. for babies. HAng in there...I sure wished I lived closer to you.

 

Oh, as for bday plans...I'd put them on hold and promise dc to celebrate when baby is better. It is not a priority. Dc will understand. And, last but not least...can you put school on hold for a while until everyone is better and sleeping more? Just cuddle together and read or let them do arts/crafts, watch educational dvd's? In the long run...it will be okay. Trust me. Hang in there...praying for you! :grouphug:

[Wendi]

I totally agree with Sue. I remember my ds having his first cold when he was 7-8 months old. The only way he'd sleep was in my arms. So we snuggled on the couch, with me holding him so his head was on my shoulder (I guess he could breathe better that way, and he felt comforted). We did this for a few days. Holding him in a warm shower helped, too.

 

But I do think he needs to go back to the doctor. Perhaps a different antibiotic is needed. I know when ds was a baby, our pediatrician recommended a decongestant; although they are not generally recommended for little ones now, perhaps your doctor can advise you in this case??

 

I hope your little sweetie is feeling - and sleeping - better soon. It sounds like the stress at your house is pretty high! Maybe dh can go off-site to do his job-hunting for a few hours, then come home and relieve you so you can get a nap?

 

Let us know how things are going, okay?

 

Wendi

[SonshineLearner]

You know, my son had a problem with throwing up when he was little. Different, but frustrating. He would also throw up almost every time he was in a car.

I resolved that when I had specific problems with my children, I would take them to specialists. I took him to a pediatric ears, nose and throat specialist. My son had been dealing with a sinus infection for over 6 months! I found out that it was a true sinus infection when I had a scan done of his sinuses. After treating him for a twice the time of normal antibiotics (21 days?) he was done with this. No more throwing up....he did have a little bit of problems with something....once more. But, it was never as sever. The specialist said that children's symptoms just don't show themselves the same as adults in these cases.

Also, even though I nursed for a long time, my husband did treat me to a few nights where he would feed rice milk in a bottle to my son, if he woke up. Is there a g-ma or g-ma person around you, who could do this?

If you're in Oregon...I'd come over:-)

Also, can you elevate the head of whatever bed/crib he's sleeping in?

Oh, and after reading this post...you could pop him in bed with you. Some would say, "NO" but I'm pretty sure that that's how babies slept in Bibilical times...and in most cultures, now. Babies are in the middle, until the next is born. If you nurse...he could nurse and then get back to sleeping...I had my son's bed up against ours...with the side off of his bed.....

And...he might be going through a huge growth spurt....My son ate every couple of hours...round the clock...for the first year (and maybe longer) He has an incredible metabolism and I felt like an iv. (But, he is shaped like a skinny green bean!)

Good Luck!

Carrie:-)

[Liz CA]

I remember those days well. And it really is all compounded by the additional stress of the job loss.

No wonder your man is feeling like the end is near.

Isn't there some kind of baby tylenol/motrin etc. that you could administer so the poor little one can get some sleep at night along with the rest of you?

I forgot if you can use Vick's Vapor Rub on a baby this young but if the Dr. says it's okay, I would try that as well. It clears the nasal passages along with the chest.

I used to spend a night or two in the rocking chair with a fussy infant many years ago. Do you have a comfortable rocking chair? Can you sleep with the baby in a separate area so your dh can get more sleep so he can be refreshed and positive about the job search?

I know - easier said than done!

[Michelle in AL]

I wonder if he could have RSV, it tis the season. It is just a cold virus to children older than 2yrs, but can cause quite a severe respiratory illness in littles.

 

I would take him in again, but I tend to be an overreactive mommy.

[Suzanne in ABQ]

When my babies were sick with colds, I always slept with them on my chest, sitting up in a recliner. Do you have a recliner? Can you borrow one? They always breathed better when they were propped up a bit.

[newlifemom]

I didn't read all the replies so if it is a repeat forgive me. Call a trusted friend or family member tell them your state(sleeplessness) and beg, yes beg them to take the kids for the night. Dh and I did that once when we were at the end of our rope. We dropped them off at our friends house around 6pm drove home and went to bed. We slept until noon and then went out to breakfast. Picked them up at 3pm and were all the better for it. HTH

[StaceyinLA]

Mendelsohn recommends a little whiskey for help sleeping. The dosage (I'm looking at the book now) is up from 10 drops up to half a tsp for a larger baby every hour for up to 3 hours if needed. He also recommended warmed olive oil (2 drops) in the ear and putting a warm heating pad under them while they sleep (of course, that is relative). Maybe the whiskey would just relax him enough and kill enough pain (if there is pain) to help him sleep.

 

I know, I know, people get all up in arms about this, but, really, all those meds are loaded with alcohol so this is NOT a big deal.

 

And of course, if he is stuffy, letting him cry is not the answer.

[WTMindy]

I would take shifts. Give dh the first shift since he sounds like he is closer to the edge. Let him sleep all night-whatever it takes, even if you have to leave and drive around so he can sleep. Whatever. Let him get in one good night. Then, comes your turn. He has to do the same for you. Maybe just one full night will help you to survive.

 

I'm so sorry you are going through this!!!!!!

[Danestress]

Send DH to bed at 9:00. You do absolutely everything in your power to let him sleep undisturbed until 3:00. Then he lets you sleep undisturbed until 9:00 in the morning. YOu can live on 6 hours of sleep.

 

When my twins were newborns, we had these "45 minutes at a time for sleep" schedules, and it was agony. Sleep became a drug, and I would have done pretty unkind things to get some.

 

I'd also take the baby back to the doctor. ANd I would assign a lot of reading to the older children, but not a lot of teaching for me!

[coffeefreak]

I didn't read all the posts, but my thought is allergies. My youngest had ear infections, and sinus problems until we got rid of our cat. The kicker was, I had "Chronic Sinusitis," until we got rid of the cat, which made me feel majorly stupid! There might be an allergin in your home and that's why his nose is running constantly and clear. It's also what contributes to the sleeplessness. I still have this problem during allergy season (sleeping a couple of hours, waking up because of the drainage). It would be good to get it checked out.

 

Blessings!

:grouphug:

[stripe]

Or a substitute: a big pile of pillows! Mine also do better when propped up -- and, hey, I do too.

 

When my babies were sick with colds, I always slept with them on my chest, sitting up in a recliner. Do you have a recliner? Can you borrow one? They always breathed better when they were propped up a bit.

 

ETA: I was referring to propping myself up and holding my baby. My children don't stay on pillows propped up; they just slide down!

Edited January 6, 2009 by stripe

[kat19]

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

I know you are not suppose to have a pillow in with babies, but my ds has had a pillow since he was about a month old~His is a boppy pillow.

He needed to be propped up because of his reflux.

He also has a little wedge to keep him propped up.

His nose has been really stuffy at night but so far it hasn't affected his sleep.

 

There have been times where he has been fussy at night(teething and so on) to the point where I have put him in bed with us(and he sleeps better). And in the morning after my dh leaves for work, baby comes to bed with me until we are ready to get up.

 

 

I hope some of the things everyone has posted help you out.

 

:grouphug::grouphug:

 

Let us know if you take him back to the doctor..

[Cricket]

When my babies were sick with colds, I always slept with them on my chest, sitting up in a recliner. Do you have a recliner? Can you borrow one? They always breathed better when they were propped up a bit.

 

This is what I did too. We didn't have a recliner so I would lay back on some pillows on the couch. I'd also put a bunch of Vick Vaporub on my chest and then a T-shirt and lay the baby on my chest. It would help my baby's sinuses open so he could breathe but I wouldn't have to rub it on him directly. It wasn't a great nights sleep but it was enough to get us by. When my oldest was 3 months old he had a cold and the only way he would sleep was in a swing. I guess 7 months is probably too big for that though.

[SquirrellyMama]

If all else fails let him sleep on your belly or in your arms at night. I had to do this with a couple of my kids when they were little and had colds. It was the only way we could sleep. You might also let him sleep in a car seat or swing.

 

Kelly

[hsmom]

Not knowing where you live I will just suggest what has worked for my family. My ds 12 has fought ear infections since he was 3 months old and still gets them even after having tubes 3 times.

 

First of all we run a humidifier in our home. This just helps keep you all moist and less chances for getting colds and such due to you drying out in your nose and such.

 

Also not amoxicillian never worked for us. They had to give us a stronger med. from the beginning. Also Don't assume that if the first one cleared up that it is not infected again. This does happen more often than most know.

 

Also try some ibu. and if you want to try it put a nice warm cloth or hot/cold packs on his ear or behind it. This really helps sooth the pain. Also the doctor can give you some drops that help with the pain that you put in the ear. Now don't settle for the ones that are over the counter they don't work as well.

 

Also if it is possible try sleeping with him in the reclinner so he is elivated. This will help with the stuffieness while sleeping. I know it will be harder on you, but maybe both of you could get a good sleep for a while.

 

Also my doctor has us use Johnson and Johnson's soothing bath. For babies, it really helps clear them up some. It smells kind of like vicks.

 

I hope you all are feeling better and rested soon.

[AnnetteB]

Poor Baby. In our family the symptoms you describe would point to allergy. Milk change? Dairy? Wheat? Cat? Dog? Dust bunnies? Mold? One year our Christmas tree nearly took me out. Sleep is vital and you should stay in touch with your doctor. Maybe they could discount or give a free recheck of his ears. Some pediatricians do. Funny thing, we run a de-humidifier in our home to keep the mold at bay. A humidifier would make everything worse in our case.

[gamommy]

I know you've gotten pages of advice and I honestly haven't read through the whole thread but here's my .02.

 

Our youngest who is 20mths has suffered a lot with recurrent ear infections and most recently with RSV. If your doc's office can perhaps a check for RSV is in order. Mine detected it with a nasal swap, like a rapid strep test. Also amox. is a great first line drug but doesn't necessarily clear all ear infections. It never worked with our youngest so it would be worth a repeat doc visit just to check. In the meantime elevating the crib mattress slightly (we used to place a pillow under one end of the mattress between it and the frame of crib) and running a cool mist vaporizer should help. Also the doc could call in prescription numbing ear drops (these cost just a few dollars even w/o insurance). They are a novicaine type solution. Then at least you'd know that his ear wasn't causing pain.

 

You have my sympathy,

Beth

[Janna]

Thank you to everyone who has prayed!!

 

The night before last (actually the night I wrote the original post, Jan. 5), ds slept that whole night through without waking. I had given him Motrin on top of the Amox. which I hadn't been doing. I had gone to bed early as well with an excruciating headache. In fact, had I not known it was an exhaustion and tension headache, I would have thought it was a migraine because I was dizzy and very nauseous. Anyway, to have that full night sleep was a God-send because the next day, yesterday, was my middle ds's birthday. I was happy and energetic and extremely productive! :D

 

Last night he didn't sleep quite as well. It was a very fitful sleep, but he put himself to sleep quickly after each occurance so I never had to get up with him. Even though my sleep was interrupted multiple times from his moans or little cries, I still feel rested today.

 

I wanted to just answer about the co-sleeping really quickly, and also, ask a question about the antibiotics, if anyone is still reading (and thank you if you are).

 

The co-sleeping is difficult with this child because he is an extremely active sleeper. He takes a long time to settle into a comfortable position whether he's healthy or sick. When you're holding him, hoping he'll fall asleep on you, it's even worse. Once he *is* asleep, if you're holding him, he'll wake within 20 min. to change positions, kwim? But then he realizes he's being held and he's awake. There was another time he had a cold, but he was 5 months old or so, and I *did* stay up with him that whole night, letting him sleep on my shoulder, knowing he was upright and could breath. But 5 month strength and 7 month strength are completely different, LOL. That cold only lasted a day. And please know, that even in letting him cry it out, we still went in to make sure he was OK, to console him and even to bounce him sometimes before laying him back down.

 

In regards to the antibiotic, multiple people mentioned that perhaps the amoxicillin needed to be changed to a stronger antibiotic. If ds has never been on an antibiotic before, why would he need a stronger one? Wouldn't *any* antibiotic be effective? If not, would this be an example of mutated or evolved bacteria that is no longer affected by standard antibiotics, but only responsive to the strong ones regardless of whether you've ever been on them before? I'm just trying to understand why his ear wouldn't be better. For the record though, I *do* think it's *getting* better *now*. He only has 2 more days to be on it (for 10 days total), but for some reason the pharmacist gave me more than that. So since he's only starting to be better within the last day, I think I'm going to use it all up, which would put me past the 10 day marker. He started pulling at his *other* ear yesterday which I'm watching very, very closely. And his nose is very stuffy/runny and his breath is stinky - like that of one who has a sinus infection (gag). Poor little guy!

 

Anyway, thank you SO MUCH to those who prayed and for all of your hugs and words of wisdom!

[Ottakee]

I would still consider taking him back in--esp. if he is pulling at the other ear, is congested, and has a stinky breath.

 

It could be that the bug that is causing his ear infection is not responding to the Amox. It is not that he hasn't been on the antibiotics before but rather that particular bacteria might not respond to it. If there is also a sinus infection, it is unlikely Amox. would kill that.

 

Can you at least call the doctor and ask for their opinion? Usually an ear infection will respond in 24-48 hours at the most to the antibiotic. If you are 8-9 days into this, he should be feeling totally back to normal.

[LisaKinVA]

:iagree:There are many different bacterias, and some simply don't respond to Amox... It's for this reason that my midwives always wait for a culture before prescribing an antibiotic for UTIs. They don't want me to take one unnecessarilly, or one that would be innefective.

 

I would still consider taking him back in--esp. if he is pulling at the other ear, is congested, and has a stinky breath.

 

It could be that the bug that is causing his ear infection is not responding to the Amox. It is not that he hasn't been on the antibiotics before but rather that particular bacteria might not respond to it. If there is also a sinus infection, it is unlikely Amox. would kill that.

 

Can you at least call the doctor and ask for their opinion? Usually an ear infection will respond in 24-48 hours at the most to the antibiotic. If you are 8-9 days into this, he should be feeling totally back to normal.