choosing the smallest room for yourself?

[xixstar]

I would love to hear from anyone that has either chosen to take the smaller room in their house or simply has a tiny bedroom as I make this decision. 

We basically have a two bedroom house and four kids; one child is moving out and I get to finally rearrange bodies in rooms (yay!!!). We have one very large bedroom and one tiny bedroom to work with. 

The large bedroom currently has a queen bed, a crib, a set of bunkbeds, multiple dressers and other furniture. I don't have the exact dimensions but it is a large room in a long rectangle layout. It also has a small walk-in closet and attached balcony/porch. We do not use the balcony at this time, I wish we did, but it was one of the reasons we bought this house. 

The tiny bedroom is my oldest son's room and he is moving out. The room is about 13x8 feet; it has a teeny closet and there is a door to access the attic, which makes the floor plan feel even smaller due to having 3 doors that open into the room.  

FIRST option - move the girls, ages 7 and 9, into the tiny bedroom.

This is the easiest option and would immediately solve our current problem where the girls have been waking or disturbing their brother when they go to bed, but honestly, this is probably a temporary problem. This would allow the girls to have a very small space to bring some toys into their room - right now, we have a no toys in the bedroom policy - and provide some room to play where the toddler won't disturb them - this space would be quite small once you add the bunkbeds and dressers to the room. In our room, we would move little brother out of the crib and into a twin bed located where the bunkbeds currently sit

SECOND option - we move into the tiny bedroom.

Our bed will take up majority of the floor space and be awkwardly placed; the headboard can't be placed against a wall due to windows/radiators on the one narrow wall and a door on the other. It has a 1/2 closet that was built into the area under the attic stairs and is barely 4-5 feet tall. We could probably add 2 dressers to this room and nothing more. But, we really only need a space for sleeping, so I don't think the small space will matter (my spouse isn't in agreement, yet). The largest downside is road noise, this room is closest to the road and it gets moderate traffic; perhaps a heavy duty white noise machine would drown it out.

Why leave the kids in the large room? I have always envisioned that room as great space for multiple children or even as a second living space (did I mention it is very large?). Our living room is tiny and there is minimal space to play in there now and available toys are always limited. With two kids playing (oldest was a teen when the younger siblings arrived), it was barely tolerable, but it's providing a constant challenge for 3 kids to all have fun in there. Having the larger room would give them a much greater area to play and space to have their toys. However, DH thinks that means the room will be a disaster all the time and, honestly, he is probably right but I don't see that as a reason to not move forward.

To start, we would probably only allow in the girls' toys so they would still have a space for them to escape their little brother. 

I am leaning towards taking the smaller room. I would probably build or buy a new bed frame to allow greater storage under our bed to deal with the lack of clothing space. While I know one can alway try something out and change if it does work, my spouse struggles with large changes like this and he would really rather not move back and wants to  make the right choice from the start -- if I had my way, I'd probably rearrange my entire house every 6 months, it is something I enjoy and he loathes, lol.

Random side note - in about 3-5 years, we will be adding another tiny bedroom to the house which will have me changing everything again, so I am not looking at this as the solution for my children from ages 9 / 7 / 2 until they are 19 / 17 / 12 but just for the next few years at least. Also, none of our rooms have an attached bath, so that isn't a factor either.

[Guest]

I would definitely be considering moving into the smaller room myself. I have not had to make this choice, but I have seen situations where it would have made sense, but the adults would not consider it. If it would work, I would want to put two twin-sized captain’s beds in the little room for DH and me. I have no particular love of sharing a bed, though; I have thought for a long time I would prefer that DH and I had separate beds. YMMV

 

If not twin-sized beds (if that does not work as a config), then yes, I would be looking to have usable storage under the queen bed and eliminate at least one dresser.

[Ottakee]

Can you divide the larger room Into 2 bedrooms?

[Cosmos]

I think it can make sense in some situations. Children use their rooms for lots of different activities, while adults mostly just sleep in them. Adults store their possessions all over the house, while children have one room to store them. (Obviously families differ, blah, blah, blah.)

[ksr5377]

We have the smallest room in our home. There is no traditional master with an attached bath, so that wasn't a part of our decision either. We chose it because of it's location at the top of the stairs, so no littles can sneak downstairs without our knowledge, and because we just need a bedroom. We don't need room for a dollhouse or the huge matchbox car track etc. It fits our furniture decently so I feel it still looks nice despite being small.

ETA: Yes, the kid bedrooms get messy because of the toys. I prefer that over my living room looking like a preschool. We do a quick pickup before bed instead of the multiple pickups every day to keep my living room at a place that didn't make me twitchy. And I'm not a neat freak.

Edited January 9, 2018 by ksr5377

[Wheres Toto]

I have to laugh a little because your tiny bedroom is about the size of our largest bedroom.   :001_smile:

 

We have three bedrooms but our bedroom is basically a set of walls dh built around our bed in the corner of the living room so we'd have some privacy.  It's about 7 x 9-ish.  It touches our King bed on three sides and has about 2 feet of space on the door side so we can get in and out.

 

Our other bedrooms are 9 x 9 1/2 and 9 x 12.  My oldest daughter had the 9x9 until she left for school, while the little guys (who aren't so little anymore!) shared the largest room.  When dd started to live on campus, my son got the 9x9 room, and she shared the largest room with her sister whenever she was home.  We couldn't keep a room empty for her when she was hardly ever here but we wanted her to always have a bed.  That is still the arrangement we have despite my oldest living with my mother at the moment.

 

It will probably stay this way unless we are able to build an addition some day.  Our room has no heat/AC vent and very poorly insulated walls and large windows that are single pane.  So we use a heated mattress pad and a space heater (it's been in single digits/negatives around here lately).  I'm not comfortable with the younger guys relying on those so its unlikely either of them will ever be in that room.   I do store all my clothes and quite a bit of stuff in the large bedroom.

[Garga]

We have the smallest room. It makes sense. I don’t go into my room and spread Lego on the floor, you know? I go in there to sleep and that’s it. There is very, very little floor space in my bedroom ith the queen bed, a large wardrobe, bookcase, nightstand, and two dressers. The room is roughly 11x11.

 

The two dressers hold my boys’ clothes, and my clothes are in a closet in another room, but it works for us. I’ve honestly never understood why adults would want a big bedroom. On all those house shows where people want a big master bedroom, I constantly wonder why? Adults use the rest of the house. Only kids are the ones to wander off and play in their room.

 

So, my vote is that you take the smaller room.

Edited January 9, 2018 by Garga

[ebrindam]

I would definitely take the small bedroom for the adults in this situation.

[ktgrok]

I'd put the adults in the smaller room, and then maybe keep YOUR dresser in the bigger room or put your clothes in the walk in closet in the bigger room, or both. That way DH has more room for his clothes in the small room. I would NOT put HIS clothes in the bigger room with the kids because if he has to walk through their mess to get them he will probably be annoyed, lol. 

 

Do you actually use the attic? Can you hang a quilt or whatever over the wall that has the door to the attic, to disguise the door, and put your headboard against that wall? I don't have a real attic (crawl space above garage is all we have in Florida) so don't know how people utilize them. But if it is just for seasonal storage I'd just block that door. 

 

If you stay in the big room can you let the girls play in there during the day? Maybe set it up so there is an area for them to use and store toys in? With the caveat they have to clean it up before Dad gets home?  Also, if you keep the big room can you put the girls' clothes in your room, to give them more space in theirs? They wouldn't need dressers then so could have toy storage instead. 

[KatieJ]

We chose that option in our last house. It had a bigger closet but less floor space. We put our sons in the biggest room as they were in a twin bed and a crib at the time. Later bunk beds gave them lots of floor space to play. Worked well for us.

[Bluegoat]

I've done tis in the past, and I'd be willing to consider it again.  Keep in mind some storage like clothes can be elsewhere.

 

I think the biggest downside I found was cleaning when the bed is so big compared to the room could be tricky.

 

But, you can always try it and see how it works out.

 

 

FWIW, we've moved bedrooms around a fair bit as the kids have gone through different stages and their needs have changed.

[Ravin]

Would putting kid lofts instead of the bunk bed be a possibility? The girls would have more floor space that way. If not, are the dressers necessary, or could you downsize their clothing storage to the closet and underbed slide drawers?

 

I would put the girls in the small room.

[SamanthaCarter]

Dh and I have the smallest room in the house (I think, ds’s might be the same square feet or close) It works. It’s 10x11 and we have a queen bed, two small nightstands and share a six drawer dresser. The closet is tiny, but we have the office closet for rarely used or out of season stuff.

 

Your situation gives me pause because you say this tiny room has three doors in it and I also assume one window. You say it’s difficult to figure out a way to put the bed in there. I think I’d lean more in the direction of staying in the big room and creating some private space with a room divider of some sort.

 

 

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[J-rap]

In our home, rooms were always very fluid.  So, kids didn't think of one room as theirs from day one to forever.  Every two to three years we changed, depending on our circumstances.  In your home, since your oldest ds is moving and since you say your living room is tiny, I'd put all the kids into the big room on one side, and make the other side of the big room kind of a play room within the bedroom.  Maybe you could even sort of separate the sleeping area from the play area with a portable room divider and a couch.  (I'm picturing this as a really big room!)  Or, if the girls want a little privacy or stay up later and want a bedside light on, you can put the crib in the corner separated off with a room divider.  (We've used dividers before to give the impression of a little privacy, but also helps keep light from shining too brightly on someone trying to sleep!)

 

I'd take the small room for yourself and your husband.

 

You can always re-evaluate in a year!  Especially if the little one isn't sleeping well, etc.

 

Your house sounds like ours!  Older home (I assume), radiators, tiny bedroom, a door that leads to the attic...  :)  

 

I also like Ottakee's idea of separating the big room into two rooms, if at all possible!

 

[KungFuPanda]

I would take the smaller room. Dh and I don’t use our room during the day, but the kids do. We really only need a place to sleep and store our clothes.

 

Alternatively, is there a way to create loft sleeping space for the girls in the attic? This would create more space in the smaller room and separate their sleeping quarters from their brothers. Could you divide up the large space to have a small sleeping space for him, a larger one for you and dh, and give the girls their own room?

 

ETA: you don’t have to build a wall to divide a room. You can do it with curtains or bookcases.

Edited January 9, 2018 by KungFuPanda

[EKS]

I think your moving into the smaller room makes a lot of sense.  

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I think I would look into dividing the big room AND moving into the small room. Then the girls could their own space, they wouldn't have to try to keep their toys from little brother, and little brother could have his own quiet room to sleep.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

 

 

I would move into smaller room.

[Lizzie in Ma]

I never spend any time in our room except to sleep, so yeah, I would do it.

[ashfern]

In our old house we took the smaller bedroom and gave the larger suite to the kids. It was a 3 bedroom house with no basement. We put the 3 girls in the master bedroom and used the walk-in closet for their toys. Our son had a room to himself and we had the 3rd bedroom. My husband was not happy about it but I told him that we only slept in our room while the kids played in theirs. It worked out well for the 2 years we lived there. (This was before the youngest was born).

[Annie G]

I think either option would work. The bunk beds in the small room (maybe blocking attic access) would still give plenty of play space and also a way to close the door to keep little brother from accessing toys he's not old enough to safely play with (I'm looking at you, Shopkins and legos!). The closet could hold the clothes and you could use two under the bed storage containers they have some with wheels that are super easy to move) for extra clothes. So you could probably eliminate the need for a dresser in there. 

 

If you moved in there, you could store dh's clothes in the closet so he doesn't have to go in and out of the kids' room to get ready for work.    If you move perhaps consider taking the closet door off and replacing it with a barn door slider or a curtain so you don't need as much space to access the closet.  If it's really small you could  find a tiny dresser to fit in the bottom and then have a rod at the top for shirts or pants.  I've seen that done nicely. 

 

 

[xixstar]

I would definitely be considering moving into the smaller room myself. I have not had to make this choice, but I have seen situations where it would have made sense, but the adults would not consider it.

Yes, I think DH is resistant to the idea because he sees himself as master of the house and thus deserves the larger room -- maybe it's the side effect of being the baby in his family and always getting the smallest space? I was an only child, I don't care about my bedroom - I care about what really serves the needs of everyone in our house.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ETA: Yes, the kid bedrooms get messy because of the toys. I prefer that over my living room looking like a preschool. We do a quick pickup before bed instead of the multiple pickups every day to keep my living room at a place that didn't make me twitchy. And I'm not a neat freak.

 

This is exactly what my living room looks like!  Luckily, I don't really mind - I like having spaces that are enjoyed - but it is getting too congested these days. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don't know what your layout is, but a friend turned her living room into a bedroom and made the largest bedroom a living room.

 

I have actually considered doing this many times - this room is the easier to heat and cool in the summer. It would also then have space to add a wood burning stove too. But, I know it wouldn't be practical to walk upstairs for our living space, it's just too far from the kitchen. :) 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'd put the adults in the smaller room, and then maybe keep YOUR dresser in the bigger room or put your clothes in the walk in closet in the bigger room, or both. That way DH has more room for his clothes in the small room. I would NOT put HIS clothes in the bigger room with the kids because if he has to walk through their mess to get them he will probably be annoyed, lol. 

 

Do you actually use the attic? Can you hang a quilt or whatever over the wall that has the door to the attic, to disguise the door, and put your headboard against that wall? I don't have a real attic (crawl space above garage is all we have in Florida) so don't know how people utilize them. But if it is just for seasonal storage I'd just block that door. 

 

If you stay in the big room can you let the girls play in there during the day? Maybe set it up so there is an area for them to use and store toys in? With the caveat they have to clean it up before Dad gets home?  Also, if you keep the big room can you put the girls' clothes in your room, to give them more space in theirs? They wouldn't need dressers then so could have toy storage instead. 

 

 

I will need to force DH to purge some clothing -- he has stuff I've never seen him wear in 10 years filling his half of the closet. I think our clothes will fit in the room, it just needs some logistical planning. Also - neither of us would appreciate walking through the kids room to get to the closet (it's on the far side of the room).

And yes, we do use the attic so it has to remain accessible -- the biggest complain with having oldest in this room was that the attic was never accessible when we needed it to be because his room was always a mess. We store our a/c units and all Christmas decorations and who know what else up there. So that is another factor, being able to carry an window air conditioning unit past the bed if need be is important, though I think this past year we just stored the one in our closet because carrying to the attic seemed like too much work. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Would putting kid lofts instead of the bunk bed be a possibility? The girls would have more floor space that way. If not, are the dressers necessary, or could you downsize their clothing storage to the closet and underbed slide drawers?

 

I would put the girls in the small room.

We cannot fit two twin loft beds in the room and they will not share a bed - so no, loft beds won't solve the space issue for them. A more space efficient solution to clothing could be found though.

 

 

 

 

 

Your situation gives me pause because you say this tiny room has three doors in it and I also assume one window. You say it’s difficult to figure out a way to put the bed in there. I think I’d lean more in the direction of staying in the big room and creating some private space with a room divider of some sort.

 

 

There are actually two windows, side by side, on the narrow wall, with radiators under each. So yeah, that means my bed will be out from that wall a bit. We'd probably just build a new bed with storage underneath it and remove the headboard completely. It will be a little awkward -- otherwise, I can have a headboard towards the door end and maybe put some shelves or a wardrobe against the back so that the created alcove by the door looks a little more intentional? It is certainly an awkward issue. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In our home, rooms were always very fluid.  So, kids didn't think of one room as theirs from day one to forever.  Every two to three years we changed, depending on our circumstances.  In your home, since your oldest ds is moving and since you say your living room is tiny, I'd put all the kids into the big room on one side, and make the other side of the big room kind of a play room within the bedroom.  Maybe you could even sort of separate the sleeping area from the play area with a portable room divider and a couch.  (I'm picturing this as a really big room!)  Or, if the girls want a little privacy or stay up later and want a bedside light on, you can put the crib in the corner separated off with a room divider.  (We've used dividers before to give the impression of a little privacy, but also helps keep light from shining too brightly on someone trying to sleep!)

 

I'd take the small room for yourself and your husband.

 

You can always re-evaluate in a year!  Especially if the little one isn't sleeping well, etc.

 

Your house sounds like ours!  Older home (I assume), radiators, tiny bedroom, a door that leads to the attic...   :)

 

I also like Ottakee's idea of separating the big room into two rooms, if at all possible!

 

We would divide the large room into sleeping spaces and play spaces. The large room functions as "two rooms" with how we've arranged furniture and furnishings to give ourselves and our daughters some sense of privacy. The long narrow layout makes it a little challenging, but it is easily divided in half. I've even debating adding walls one day but it would still require having to walk through one room to reach the other and while a lot of people in this area do that, that layout has always annoyed me. Plus is would reduce the daylight for half the room too. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I would take the smaller room. Dh and I don’t use our room during the day, but the kids do. We really only need a place to sleep and store our clothes.

 

Alternatively, is there a way to create loft sleeping space for the girls in the attic? This would create more space in the smaller room and separate their sleeping quarters from their brothers. Could you divide up the large space to have a small sleeping space for him, a larger one for you and dh, and give the girls their own room?

 

ETA: you don’t have to build a wall to divide a room. You can do it with curtains or bookcases.

 

Nope, the attic is not a finished attic.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I think I would look into dividing the big room AND moving into the small room. Then the girls could their own space, they wouldn't have to try to keep their toys from little brother, and little brother could have his own quiet room to sleep.

 Yes, the large room would be divided up with furniture/furnishings to clearly mark the the spaces as separate. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[sassenach]

It’s worth a try, I think. If you hate it, switch things out in 6 months.

[Annie G]

Yes, I think DH is resistant to the idea because he sees himself as master of the house and thus deserves the larger room -- maybe it's the side effect of being the baby in his family and always getting the smallest space?

 

 

 

I can understand that, but has it occurred to him that sleeping in a room without any kids might be an excellent tradeoff to having the smaller room?  

[Julie Smith]

Dh and I have the smallest bedroom. We have seperate beds since he moves around a TON when sleeping. We both have doubles. The room fits both our beds - but in a "L" shape. Any other direction and the door to the room is blocked. My bed blocks the closet so we removed the doors from the closet, it also means that I get a side table of sorts since I have access to the floor of the closet, which isn't used by beds. (Our beds are mattresses on the floor - so a typical side table would be way to high.) Other than that we have about one square meter of space between the end of my bed and the area the door opens in. 

 

This works out perfectly since my Dh doesn't keep a clean room, and I'm now greatly influenced by him. So if the room gets messy it still only takes 2 minutes to clean up, since there is NO space for mess. An armload of dirty clothes and two or three dishes on the floor by my Dh's bed and the room is to packed for anything else. 

[Raifta]

DH and I used to have the largest room.  It was so large it has two queen mattresses on the floor beside each other when the kids were little and a couch and still had empty floor space.  It was ridiculous.  And we didn't use it much.  

 

Once the kids got older and weren't always sleeping in the same bed as me, we gave them that room.  They each got their own bed and we moved into one of the two fairly small rooms.  There is room for our queen size bed, and nightstands, a dresser and very very narrow aisles to get to the bed.  But again, we don't use it much.  We sleep there.  It fits all our stuff.  It's a much better use of space then the old situation.  

 

The situation has changed again and DD and DS each have their own room (DS has the other small room, DD's is somewhat bigger.  The giant master bedroom?  That's now the office where DH, DD and DS each have their own desk and computer.  There's also a reading/Lego nook with two bookshelves and another bookshelf elsewhere.  The guinea pigs live in the office.

 

To sum up, having the smallest room has worked really well for us and has been for about 7 years now.  We always tell the kids that nothing is set in stone when we make a change and find ourselves making fairly major changes every 2-3 years.

[eternalsummer]

I would take the small room and give the kids, who actually use the space, the big room.

 

I don't understand why your DH thinks being the oldest person in the house, or the breadwinner, or the father, or whatever the issue is, entitles him to take up space he won't use while relegating children to a smaller space.  I can kind of see the argument, if that's your perspective in life, in saying that the oldest person/breadwinner/father/etc. gets the best of something when use is more or less equal - say he gets the room with the attached bathroom, or something.  But why would he want a room he won't even use?

[fraidycat]

We are currently in a two bedroom. The kids have the bedrooms and DH and I sleep in the living room. He is only here part-time and a firm couch is better for my back and hips, so this is the arrangement that makes sense for us.

 

In previous places DH and I have had the smaller room when it made sense to do so. We do not have all the toys and knick-knacks that the kids seem to acquire and require storage space for.

[xixstar]

I can understand that, but has it occurred to him that sleeping in a room without any kids might be an excellent tradeoff to having the smaller room?  

He actually likes the set up now, so it's not really a motivating trade off.

 

He is the far more cuddly and affectionate person and usually sad when our children have finally stopped crawling in bed at night, whereas I rejoice. I'm pretty sure if I could have handed off breastfeeding, he would have loved it and my kids would have nursed longer than they did. It will be a little sad to him for things to change at all, I get that to a small bit because I do like that I wake in an instant when one girls gets upset at night and just  speaking to her usually solves it, but am also very excited to have my own room. Of course, he sleeps like a rock and everyone's breathing or snoring doesn't keep him up liked it does me, so he only sees the positives.

 

 

 

I would take the small room and give the kids, who actually use the space, the big room.

 

I don't understand why your DH thinks being the oldest person in the house, or the breadwinner, or the father, or whatever the issue is, entitles him to take up space he won't use while relegating children to a smaller space.  I can kind of see the argument, if that's your perspective in life, in saying that the oldest person/breadwinner/father/etc. gets the best of something when use is more or less equal - say he gets the room with the attached bathroom, or something.  But why would he want a room he won't even use?

Yeah, making sense of his viewpoint isn't always easy for me either. He certainly sees many things very different than I do (and what I'd assume many people do) -- but we've crossed many bridges he didn't want to because of some idea of custom or "what people do or don't do", I suspect he'll get there on this idea too.

[Hilltopmom]

We’ve always had the smallest room in the house- we only use it overnight, so the kids have shared the bigger rooms. Dressers can go in closets or hallways too if they don’t fit in your bedroom. We had ours in the living room/ dining room once.

[OneStepAtATime]

O.k. this may seem an odd suggestion but have you tried consulting with someone who does designing/remodeling?  I'm wondering if there is an easier solution than what is currently obvious if someone who is really good at this type of thing were to be consulted.  I'm not talking a remodel, just a consultation, especially since you are eventually planning on adding another bedroom.  Consulting with someone who has expertise might net you some ideas that could be implemented now that might also help in the long run, things that wouldn't cost much and would be relatively easy to implement but would help now and for future plans.  

 

You might need to talk with more than one to find a person that really "gets" what you are needing.

[Cosmos]

I don't understand why your DH thinks being the oldest person in the house, or the breadwinner, or the father, or whatever the issue is, entitles him to take up space he won't use while relegating children to a smaller space.  I can kind of see the argument, if that's your perspective in life, in saying that the oldest person/breadwinner/father/etc. gets the best of something when use is more or less equal - say he gets the room with the attached bathroom, or something.  But why would he want a room he won't even use?

 

I don't think his point of view is uncommon at all. In fact, I'm surprised to see so many people agreeing with the OP. In most houses, the master bedroom is the largest and in most families, the parents use that bedroom. It's "the way things are done", and many people would find it strange to consider any other arrangements.

 

I agree a different arrangement may be more logical, but I don't think it's unusual for someone to assume the parents "deserve" the biggest bedroom.

[Btervet]

Normally, I would say adults in the small bedroom. However, something no one else mentioned that would be a dealbreaker for me is leaving kids alone in a room with a balcony. Between crazy toddlers and adventurous preteens I would never feel safe with that situation. 

 

The other concern would be whether your youngest would end up in your room/bed anyway for a while even if he was technically in the big room with his sisters. Obviously this would vary by family, but something to consider if you go to the small room and still end up with 3 people in there.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I never got the point of having a huge master bedroom.  I basically only sleep in my bedroom.  Not like I hang out there so really small would be fine by me.

 

 

[OneStepAtATime]

I don't think his point of view is uncommon at all. In fact, I'm surprised to see so many people agreeing with the OP. In most houses, the master bedroom is the largest and in most families, the parents use that bedroom. It's "the way things are done", and many people would find it strange to consider any other arrangements.

 

I agree a different arrangement may be more logical, but I don't think it's unusual for someone to assume the parents "deserve" the biggest bedroom.

I agree.  I don't think this is uncommon.

 

DH absolutely feels this way.  I don't (I'm more practical about space designation) but he does and so did his father and mother.  They are all of the belief that the parents of the household are the ones paying the bills and at least doing the lion's share of the house maintenance/cleaning/bill paying, etc. Therefore, the parents deserve the largest private space for sleeping/reading/unwinding at the end of their very long day.  They absolutely see the children as not having yet earned that privilege.  They also feel very strongly that children should not be allowed to "take over" the house and decisions should be made with the parents in mind first and the children come second.  Animals come last, if at all.  

 

I have no idea how my own parents would have handled it under those circumstances but I strongly suspect that my dad would have deeply resented having to give up his private space.  He used the bedroom to veg out and relax at the end of each day.  He loved us very much but his bedroom was his and Mom's private space.  We did not sleep in that space with them except on very rare occasion if my brother or I were sick and needed constant care and we certainly did not play in there.  Dad, I do not believe, would have understood giving up his bedroom and moving into a much smaller space to make room for his kids to have the larger space.  However, my brother and I never slept in their room to begin with.  There was never shared space to begin with.  There was only my brother and I (miscarriages prevented more), though, so if they had had a larger family that feeling might have been different.

 

From my perspective, I would have no issues with moving into the smaller bedroom in principle.  It seems a practical solution.  In reality, though, I wonder about whether it would work well with all the doors/windows in the smaller room plus the littlest one maybe ending up in the smaller room with the parents anyway.  

 

That was why I had suggested up thread maybe consulting with a designer who might be able to help brainstorm some workable solutions.  We did this in our old house.  The first one was a very poor fit but the second one was a big help and solved some issues for us in ways we had not thought of.  Most of it we could do ourselves.  We just needed to be pointed in the right direction.

[ktgrok]

If everyone is okay still sleeping in one room, how about keeping bigger bedroom as a sleep space for everyone, and making smaller bedroom a play room? Maybe with a daybed in it for if you and hubby need some "adult time" when kids are asleep in the other room? Or a very plush rug on the floor, lol. 

[SKL]

My kids used to share a small room like that.  It was OK but they were bursting out of it by 8yo, even with many of their toys in another space.  There wasn't enough closet space for them to continue growing in that room.

 

How about this idea.  Keep the big bedroom for you and the baby, but also keep some of the girls' furniture / clothes in your room.  Let them have their toys in their bedroom along with their bunkbed.

 

If you do decide to move you and your husband into the smaller room, can you switch to a full-size bed?  Can you leave your clothes in the big room / closet?

[ktgrok]

Oh, that's an idea. Toys and beds for girls in the small room, their clothes in your room. 

[xixstar]

 

How about this idea.  Keep the big bedroom for you and the baby, but also keep some of the girls' furniture / clothes in your room.  Let them have their toys in their bedroom along with their bunkbed.

This made me a giggle a little because one of the reasons I want them out of my room is because of the clothing and how they don't manage it well - I gotta really purge and tackle their clothing because clearly the system we have isn't working which I assume means there are more clothes than space...

 

[ktgrok]

Ok.then they keep sleeping in your room, all together with you, but their clothing and their toys go in the smaller room. So a play area and their "dressing area" are in there. 

[xixstar]

I talked with DH and went over all the reasons it would be awful for us to have the little room while also bring much better for the kids to have the larger room. He is now on board with us taking the little room, but first a little late winter/early spring project. 

We will first rip out the closet and under stairs area -- yay! This will transform the 1/4 closet into a 3/4 closet. There are the remnants of an old brick chimney in the wall next to the closet, which left a lot of unsupported weight on the ceiling below, that we've wanted to remove for a long time. So we will rip that out and then build in a new closet, or perhaps a drawer system if that would be a better use of the space. 

I think I'll hold off on sharing my goals of building a new bed frame that includes a lot more storage, lest I scare him away.