why do Brown graduates say they went to school "in Providence"?

[fdrinca]

Sincerely curious!

 

I've known a few Brown grads/attendees over the years, spanning different ages/hometowns/current locations. **All** of them refer to their college years by saying they were "in Providence."

 

I don't really know of other universities where this happens, although I'm open to learning about more.

[Tsuga]

I only can think of one Brown grad and he said he went to Brown. :)

[Laura in CA]

Many people I know who went to Harvard say they attended school "in Cambridge." (Dave Barry even mentions this. :) )
Which is confusing, because my first thought is always Cambridge in England ...

I think it might be a form of not wanting to "show off," but I'm not sure, and I'm interested to hear what others think. False modesty? Convention? Something else?

 

[Kathryn]

My mom says she went to Brown. My cousin is there getting a doctorate right now and he does also.

[MEmama]

Um, because it is?

 

I say I went to school in San Francisco, but I'm sure lots of people use the full school name. I've never heard anyone say they went to school in Cambridge in reference to Harvard, since that could also refer to MIT, but another poster has. Many people say they are going to school in Boston, leaving which school open for further discussion. I've not heard anyone who went to Brown say "in Providence" as a substitute, but the OP has so some people must.

 

I'm sure it's just a matter of personal experience. Maybe it has to do with geography, with where the conversation takes place in relation to the school in question.

[dancingmama]

My husband does this for his school, referring to where he went to school in general geographic discussions. Or he uses the school's formal name which leaves most people baffled. Otoh, when the person he's talking to knows where he went based on the above info, there is an immediate connection. It's almost like a secret handshake.

 

I, otoh, usually just say the specific city mainly because I went to a small, private school that most people have never heard of.

[Haiku]

I went to a bland state school, and I say I went to school "in [town]." I don't know why, but I remember when I was in school and people asked me, I would say, "I'm in [town]." My sister, who went to an different state school would say, "I'm in [town]." I guess it's just a thing. My friends all did it, too.

 

If someone told me they went to school "in Providence," I would not know what school they went to. I think I only tell people from my state what town I went to school in. I think I tell out-of-staters the name of the school.

[73349]

Yale graduates also say they went to school in New Haven. I think it's an effort not to be obviously name-dropping/bragging about a "big name" school.

[Squawky Acres]

I do notice this with Brown graduates, and also Harvard graduates, as previously mentioned (not so much Princeton, as "I went to school in New Jersey" doesn't have the same feel).  It could be a top college/Ivy League thing.  You don't hear it so much in certain professional settings, or in larger cities where everyone went to a top school, and "I went to Harvard" can lead to a long friendly discussion of all the people you might know in common rather than uncomfortable pauses or exclamations of, "Oh, you must be smart!"  Out here in rural New England, we have a mix of graduates of all types of schools, or no higher education at all.  It doesn't really matter in my small town, and so I avoid mentioning the Ivy League schools I attended unless directly asked.  

[poppy]

Typical Ivy League . Call it false modesty , actual modesty, wanting to avoid it become a conversation rabbit hole, trendiness or just literal truth - all true.

[Hikin' Mama]

Sometimes I say I went to college at the University of Oregon, but sometimes I say I went to school in Eugene. I think it depends on the context of the conversation.

[Desert Strawberry]

Yale graduates also say they went to school in New Haven. I think it's an effort not to be obviously name-dropping/bragging about a "big name" school.

This is what I've heard. I've also read that Ivy students will wear school shirts from other schools, but not their own, as it's viewed as braggy and tacky. I thought that was kind of odd. I never wore any school attire besides my sports uniforms. 

[Katy]

On the campus tour of Harvard they made sure to mention that's it's considered very rude to name drop Harvard, and that unless there was an athletic event you could be sure that every single person we saw on campus in Harvard sweatshirts were tourists.

[Lady Florida.]

My school is far from Ivy League and in fact is just part of the state university system. Sometimes I say I went to Florida State, sometimes I went to school "in Tallahassee". It's just whatever comes out, and I don't even think about it. Is it possible they don't really think about it either? 

 

BTW, I rarely say FSU.

[MEmama]

My school is far from Ivy League and in fact is just part of the state university system. Sometimes I say I went to Florida State, sometimes I went to school "in Tallahassee". It's just whatever comes out, and I don't even think about it. Is it possible they don't really think about it either?

 

BTW, I rarely say FSU.

I would guess that's it, at least in our small New England town. It's hardly name dropping here if you went to Harvard or Yale, it's just sort of expected. Certainly not unusual and definitely not bragging or crass, at any rate.

[marbel]

The Brown graduate I know says she went to Brown.  

 

I don't get it.  If someone asks "where did you go to school?" how is it rude or crass to answer the question?   If I ask where someone went to school, I don't mean "what town did you live in when you went to school?" 

 

BTW I went to San Jose State University, hardly an Ivy or top-tier school.  I still don't think it's rude or braggy when someone says they went to... whatever better school.

[Kathryn]

Come to think of it, the only person I recall doing something like that was an incredibly conceited little prick fifteen years younger than us whom we met who said he was soon leaving to go to Boston to get a masters degree. Since my family is from Boston, I asked where. Then he launched into some sappy fake modesty about how he doesn't like to say where because it intimidates people. I thought my eyes might roll out of my head.

[Cherylanne]

Typical Ivy League . Call it false modesty , actual modesty, wanting to avoid it become a conversation rabbit hole, trendiness or just literal truth - all true.

 

This. I am a Brown grad. If someone asks me where I went to school, of course I say "Brown". But if the question is not directly asked and I'm simply referring to my college experience, I say "Providence", because the person hasn't explicitly asked. And it is almost always a conversation rabbit hole. People feel like they have to comment. I simply dislike having to give pat responses to the comments. For the same reason I don't volunteer the fact that I homeschool except when asked.

 

Also, this was a smaller issue when I lived in New England and just about everyone knows someone who went to an Ivy. Now that I live in SC, I feel like when I say I went to Brown people look at me like I have 2 heads. My husband who went to MIT also says "Cambridge".

[redsquirrel]

Lol, I live in a town with a 'big name' school and people have hardly heard of the town.  When I get asked where I live and I say the name of the city I get blank stares.  I then follow up with the name of the school and people say, "Oh, ok. I've heard of that." That is often followed up with a 'I think my wife's cousin went there' or some  such thing.

 

[Chrysalis Academy]

This. I am a Brown grad. If someone asks me where I went to school, of course I say "Brown". But if the question is not directly asked and I'm simply referring to my college experience, I say "Providence", because the person hasn't explicitly asked. And it is almost always a conversation rabbit hole. People feel like they have to comment. I simply dislike having to give pat responses to the comments. For the same reason I don't volunteer the fact that I homeschool except when asked.

 

Also, this was a smaller issue when I lived in New England and just about everyone knows someone who went to an Ivy. Now that I live in SC, I feel like when I say I went to Brown people look at me like I have 2 heads. My husband who went to MIT also says "Cambridge".

 

Exactly.  If it wasn't a question about the school specifically, I will say "in Boston" (which isn't even literally true, it was Cambridge) because I usually don't want to deal with the conversational derail that happens when it comes out that it was grad school, at MIT.

[T'smom]

When someone asks me, I answer with K-State. They usually respond asking which of the states that start with a K. (Kansas, BTW) But in conversations about that part of my life I have mentioned living in Manhattan people always do a double take and then I have to explain that there is a Manhattan in Kansas, New York doesn't have the only one! I don't do this on purpose, I just don't think about it until after they give me a surprised look.

[Farrar]

Am I the only person who, when I think of Brown, pictures Lisa Simpson crying out in horror, "No! Not Brown! Not Brown!"

[Farrar]

By the way, this only works if your school was in a big enough city. People familiar with small New England liberal arts colleges or women's colleges certainly have heard of Mount Holyoke, where I went. But if I tried to say I went to school in "South Hadley" I'm sure it would just be weird and confusing.

[Crimson Wife]

It really depends on the social circle. In ones where most people attended a "name-brand" school, the question is generally answered directly. But in a situation where that is not likely to be the case, then it's polite to give a vague answer and let the asker decide whether or not to ask the follow-up.

[Crimson Wife]

By the way, this only works if your school was in a big enough city. People familiar with small New England liberal arts colleges or women's colleges certainly have heard of Mount Holyoke, where I went. But if I tried to say I went to school in "South Hadley" I'm sure it would just be weird and confusing.

 

I've generally heard this answered as "Western MA", which could be UMass or Springfield State or it could be Amherst or Williams.

[Reefgazer]

The implication of saying "in Providence" is that it is obvious what would be in Providence, because why else would you even go to Providence?  I think it is actually a form of snobbery, the same as saying "in Cambridge".

[8circles]

It really depends on the social circle. In ones where most people attended a "name-brand" school, the question is generally answered directly. But in a situation where that is not likely to be the case, then it's polite to give a vague answer and let the asker decide whether or not to ask the follow-up.

Why is answering vaguely the polite thing to do? I'm guessing that if someone asks the question, they actually want to know the answer, not some vague ~well, do you really want to know because you might be jealous~ non-answer.

[Valley Girl]

Why is answering vaguely the polite thing to do? I'm guessing that if someone asks the question, they actually want to know the answer, not some vague ~well, do you really want to know because you might be jealous~ non-answer.

 

Yeah. Being evasive makes it look like it's some big secret. If I ask where someone went to school and he or she tells me the name of the town, I'm probably going to say, "OK, but where did you go to school?" Who knew a simple question could have so many layers to it?

[Squawky Acres]

I agree that a direct question should be answered directly.  It is impolite to answer vaguely -- and actually, I do not like the "in Providence" or "in Boston" response, as if the speaker thinks I would be too jealous to hear.  

 

I just meant that I found it is best not to mention where I went to school unless it is a direct question, as it tends to derail conversation and really isn't relevant to the life I have now.

 

 

[Kathryn]

I agree that a direct question should be answered directly. It is impolite to answer vaguely -- and actually, I do not like the "in Providence" or "in Boston" response, as if the speaker thinks I would be too jealous to hear.

 

I just meant that I found it is best not to mention where I went to school unless it is a direct question, as it tends to derail conversation and really isn't relevant to the life I have now.

I know what you mean. There's a difference between:

"When I was at school in Providence, blah blah blah." and "When I was at Brown, blah blah blah."

 

But there's also a difference between:

"Kathryn and Mr. Kathryn, meet J. He's just stopping by to say goodbye. He's leaving for grad school tomorrow."

"Oh, really? Where are you going to school?"

"Boston."

"Where in Boston?"

"Oh, I don't really like to say. It tends to intimidate people when they hear where I'm going."

 

And

 

"Kathryn and Mr. Kathryn, meet J. He's just stopping by to say goodbye. He's leaving for grad school tomorrow."

"Oh, really? Where are you going to school?"

"Harvard."

[Laurel]

By the way, this only works if your school was in a big enough city. People familiar with small New England liberal arts colleges or women's colleges certainly have heard of Mount Holyoke, where I went. But if I tried to say I went to school in "South Hadley" I'm sure it would just be weird and confusing.

Like Crimson said, I often say I went to school in western Mass. But that's more if I'm bringing it up, or it naturally comes up in conversation. If asked directly "where did you go to school/college?" then I answer with the name.

[AmandaVT]

The implication of saying "in Providence" is that it is obvious what would be in Providence, because why else would you even go to Providence?  I think it is actually a form of snobbery, the same as saying "in Cambridge".

 

Hey now! Providence College is a great school and I transferred in to Rhode Island College which is also in Providence. And Johnson & Wales, a great culinary school is there too!  :-) 

[Dmmetler]

LOL-I have to say that when I hear a placename instead of a college name, I tend to assume a non-flagship state college campus, which shares a name with the flagship and is referred to by place name to distinguish itself from the flagship. So, for example, at DD's conference a couple of weeks ago, probably half the students there were from "University of Tennessee"-but only the Knoxville students would say they attended "UT"-the others either would say "Martin" or "Chattanooga".  The idea that they were trying to keep me from being envious of their privileged background wouldn't even register. Guess that's what happens when the schools you attend are decidedly non-Ivy!

 

 

 

 

 

[MiMi 4under3]

Hey now! Providence College is a great school and I transferred in to Rhode Island College which is also in Providence. And Johnson & Wales, a great culinary school is there too!  :-) 

 

Hey! Don't forget RISD!

[Acadie]

Yes, coming from the northeast--where the names of specific schools in that region would be recognized--and now living in the midwest, schools in my region of origin are not always recognized. So context absolutely matters.

 

When I hear Providence I immediately think RISD, Johnson and Wales, Providence College, and Brown, at least. I could think of others with more time.

 

I went to a Catholic college in Worcester, MA. Depending on the context I might say Holy Cross, or a school in Worcester, MA, or college in MA. Sometimes I wish I stayed in the range where people would know what I was talking about :)

 

And--yay for Mt. Holyoke! When I visit my folks we're so close to there now, and it's a great school. 

 

Amy 

 

 

[Crimson Wife]

Why is answering vaguely the polite thing to do? I'm guessing that if someone asks the question, they actually want to know the answer, not some vague ~well, do you really want to know because you might be jealous~ non-answer.

 

Because most people who ask are just trying to make small talk and not genuinely interested in the specific answer. It's an ice-breaker akin to "did you grow up out here?" (which here in CA, the answer is very often "no").

[8circles]

Because most people who ask are just trying to make small talk and not genuinely interested in the specific answer. It's an ice-breaker akin to "did you grow up out here?" (which here in CA, the answer is very often "no").

Even if I'm just making smalltalk, if I ask where someone went to school, I'm not asking for the zipcode, but which school.

 

Nevertheless, I'm still not sure why its more polite to say the city rather than the school while in certain circles. The non-name-branders are asking the same question, why is a vague answer more polite for them?

[Reefgazer]

Yes, they are great schools, I agree!  That's the point I was making; to say "in Providence", as if there was only 1 thing to do in Providence (Brown), was the height of snobbery and excluding other colleges and activities.

Hey now! Providence College is a great school and I transferred in to Rhode Island College which is also in Providence. And Johnson & Wales, a great culinary school is there too!  :-) 

 

[Rebel Yell]

This is what I've heard. I've also read that Ivy students will wear school shirts from other schools, but not their own, as it's viewed as braggy and tacky. I thought that was kind of odd. I never wore any school attire besides my sports uniforms. 

 

LOL...  A really nice and talented guy I know went to that "school in Pittsburgh" (rhymes with "Barnleggy Felon") and from the moment of his acceptance all I ever saw him in was CMU shirts. At his high school grad party his parents and girlfriend were all wearing school shirts, too- and his younge brother had a "CMU Sibling" shirt on.

[Tsuga]

By the way, this only works if your school was in a big enough city. People familiar with small New England liberal arts colleges or women's colleges certainly have heard of Mount Holyoke, where I went. But if I tried to say I went to school in "South Hadley" I'm sure it would just be weird and confusing.

 

Or if your city only has one college! In Seattle we have Seattle University, Seattle Pacific, the University of Washington, and Cornish College of the Arts.

 

Of course, although I personally think all of those are awesome schools and the instruction fabulous and the students world-class, they still aren't something anyone is bragging about outside of Seattle.

 

New York also has some great universities but you can hardly say "I went to school in New York."

[Cammie]

The intention behind it is probably different than the result it obtains.

 

I know many, many people who went to school in "New Haven."

 

When they say that, I'm pretty sure they feel they are being more modest than saying Yale.  They don't want to sound snobby or like they are flaunting their Ivy League education.

 

It is also "code talk."  Another person from Yale will automatically get the reference and then they can bond.

 

However, it rings like false modesty to the people hearing it.

 

It is kind of along the lines of one lady saying "Oh, I love your new bag!"  And the other lady responding (about the brand new $5000 bag) "Oh this old thing?"

 

 

[inmyopinion]

Hey now! Providence College is a great school and I transferred in to Rhode Island College which is also in Providence. And Johnson & Wales, a great culinary school is there too!  :-) 

Hey, I graduated from RIC! 

[Chrysalis Academy]

Sometimes modesty is just modesty. Not necessarily false.

[inmyopinion]

My husband is a Brown grad, and when asked where he went to school, he answers "Brown."   

[inmyopinion]

Oh, and I was born and raised in Rhode Island, Pawtucket, literally down the street from Brown.  Got married at Brown, Upper Manning Chapel, just went back to visit last summer.  Graduated from Rhode Island College and Roger Williams School of Law.  I say Bubblah.  Ok, I am just so excited to see RI in a post!!!!!!!!  

[KungFuPanda]

Yes, coming from the northeast--where the names of specific schools in that region would be recognized--and now living in the midwest, schools in my region of origin are not always recognized. So context absolutely matters.

 

When I hear Providence I immediately think RISD, Johnson and Wales, Providence College, and Brown, at least. I could think of others with more time.

 

I went to a Catholic college in Worcester, MA. Depending on the context I might say Holy Cross, or a school in Worcester, MA, or college in MA. Sometimes I wish I stayed in the range where people would know what I was talking about :)

 

And--yay for Mt. Holyoke! When I visit my folks we're so close to there now, and it's a great school.

 

Amy

I went through an Electronic Warfare Analysis course in Worcester ðŸ˜

[gardenmom5]

my girls didn't go to brown (though it was 1dd 1st choice,).  when I'm asked where they went - I just say upstate NY.  we live on the west coast.  I've had a variety of responses when I say the name, from "where's that?", to snooty comments about top tier schools.

 

it's easier to just give the general location. most people really don't care about the specific school.

[gardenmom5]

Sometimes modesty is just modesty. Not necessarily false.

 

and sometimes it's shutting down an unwanted conversation before it can get started.

[gardenmom5]

Or if your city only has one college! In Seattle we have Seattle University, Seattle Pacific, the University of Washington, and Cornish College of the Arts.

 

Of course, although I personally think all of those are awesome schools and the instruction fabulous and the students world-class, they still aren't something anyone is bragging about outside of Seattle.

 

New York also has some great universities but you can hardly say "I went to school in New York."

 

and the name of the town dds attended school has a college of a different name.  but there is a college with the same name as their town - but in a DIFFERENT town.

 

and the UW has some top tier programs.

[Dmmetler]

LOL... A really nice and talented guy I know went to that "school in Pittsburgh" (rhymes with "Barnleggy Felon") and from the moment of his acceptance all I ever saw him in was CMU shirts. At his high school grad party his parents and girlfriend were all wearing school shirts, too- and his younge brother had a "CMU Sibling" shirt on.

Well, given that if you cross the street from that school in Pittsburgh, you're in that other school in Pittsburgh (U. Pitt), and it's about three times the size....