Vent...is this common..PS related

[LucyStoner]

For goodness sakes, how long has school been in session? A week? Two weeks?

 

The school calendars are not secret. Need a teeth cleaning? Then schedule it before school starts. That is how responsible parents of school aged children deal.

 

This is crazy!

 

Bill

 

There are many reasons why a perfectly responsible adult will find they have to take a kid out of school for something as mundane as dental work.  There's distance, family size, access to coverage etc.  I'm pretty sure I have pulled my nephew out more than half a dozen times in a year and a half just for dental care.

 

Have you ever needed to rely on a public health clinic to get your son's needs met?  Have you ever even called a public health clinic for a rundown of their appointment polices?  By way of information, they don't offer you just anytime here, you take what is available from very limited, if any choices.  

 

Seriously, you clearly have no idea how difficult it can be for parents with limited access to care, for any myriad of reasons.  

 

I assure you, I can't just say "I would like to schedule this appointment on Tuesday the 17th at 3:50 so that these special snowflakes don't have to miss a moment of school and so they still can make it to their riding lessons!"  It's really a "you get what you get" situation.  Even if what you get is at 10AM and turns into a 4 hour wait.  Protip: pack snacks.  

 

My nephew needed a root canal.  Public health "doesn't do that".  You know how far the nearest place that does which takes state dental insurance and works on kids is?  It's over an hour from here if traffic is light and I don't live in the middle of nowhere either.   

 

Sadly, my niece and nephew are closer to "average" for public schools than one might think.  The number of kids on free lunch in their district is 40% and the number rises as high as 79% a district just a few short miles from some of the wealthiest enclaves on a well off metro area.  Everything takes longer when you have to access the cheapest options.  

[Spy Car]

There are many reasons why a perfectly responsible adult will find they have to take a kid out of school for something as mundane as dental work.  There's distance, family size, access to coverage etc.  I'm pretty sure I have pulled my nephew out more than half a dozen times in a year and a half just for dental care.

 

Have you ever needed to rely on a public health clinic to get your son's needs met?  Have you ever even called a public health clinic for a rundown of their appointment polices?  By way of information, they don't offer you just anytime here, you take what is available from very limited, if any choices.  

 

Seriously, you clearly have no idea how difficult it can be for parents with limited access to care, for any myriad of reasons.  

 

I assure you, I can't just say "I would like to schedule this appointment on Tuesday the 17th at 3:50 so that these special snowflakes don't have to miss a moment of school and so they still can make it to their riding lessons!"  It's really a "you get what you get" situation.  Even if what you get is at 10AM and turns into a 4 hour wait.  Protip: pack snacks.  

 

My nephew needed a root canal.  Public health "doesn't do that".  You know how far the nearest place that does which takes state dental insurance and works on kids is?  It's over an hour from here if traffic is light and I don't live in the middle of nowhere either.   

 

Sadly, my niece and nephew are closer to "average" for public schools than one might think.  The number of kids on free lunch in their district is 40% and the number rises as high as 79% a district just a few short miles from some of the wealthiest enclaves on a well off metro area.  Everything takes longer when you have to access the cheapest options.  

 

This was a routine teeth cleaning—after a long summer. There is NO EXCUSE for not getting the cleanings accomplished prior to the start of school.

 

This was not an dental emergency.

 

Bill

[Butter]

For goodness sakes, how long has school been in session? A week? Two weeks?

 

The school calendars are not secret. Need a teeth cleaning? Then schedule it before school starts. That is how responsible parents of school aged children deal.

 

This is crazy!

 

Bill

 

Why is it crazy?  If someone had their appointment in August, their next one will be in February.  It is easy to schedule one cleaning on an off time, but it's very hard to get both of them scheduled on off days.  If you read what the OP said they do one in the summer, but the other is, of course, during the school year.  The dentist appointment in question was during last school year and she is concerned about the rule change since her kid will be due for another cleaning in a few months.

[EmseB]

There are many reasons why a perfectly responsible adult will find they have to take a kid out of school for something as mundane as dental work. There's distance, family size, access to coverage etc. I'm pretty sure I have pulled my nephew out more than half a dozen times in a year and a half just for dental care.

 

Have you ever needed to rely on a public health clinic to get your son's needs met? Have you ever even called a public health clinic for a rundown of their appointment polices? By way of information, they don't offer you just anytime here, you take what is available from very limited, if any choices.

 

Seriously, you clearly have no idea how difficult it can be for parents with limited access to care, for any myriad of reasons.

 

I assure you, I can't just say "I would like to schedule this appointment on Tuesday the 17th at 3:50 so that these special snowflakes don't have to miss a moment of school and so they still can make it to their riding lessons!" It's really a "you get what you get" situation. Even if what you get is at 10AM and turns into a 4 hour wait. Protip: pack snacks.

 

My nephew needed a root canal. Public health "doesn't do that". You know how far the nearest place that does which takes state dental insurance and works on kids is? It's over an hour from here if traffic is light and I don't live in the middle of nowhere either.

 

Sadly, my niece and nephew are closer to "average" for public schools than one might think. The number of kids on free lunch in their district is 40% and the number rises as high as 79% a district just a few short miles from some of the wealthiest enclaves on a well off metro area. Everything takes longer when you have to access the cheapest options.

Ok, all of this, and why does the school get to dictate my schedule anyway? What if I want to take my kid out to lunch after a doctor appointment? My kids don't belong to the school.

 

School is a service people avail themselves of. It's not educational neglect to miss a day of school.

[LucyStoner]

This was a routine teeth cleaning—after a long summer. There is NO EXCUSE for not getting the cleanings accomplished prior to the start of school.

 

This was not an dental emergency.

 

Bill

 

It really must be nice to not need to see the real, practical hardships that kids in poverty live with Bill.  I mean, I see your "It is a mortal sin to miss school" high horse and raise you a "many kids are poorer than sh!t" high horse.   :lol:

 

People need 2 cleanings a year.  They both can not be squeezed into 6-12 days in June  (school lets out around mid to late June here) and  maybe 6 days in December for the vast majority of patients ages 5-18.  

 

Yanno, most kids like my nephew don't have an aunt who stays home and homeschools and can figure out a way to get him to everything in a privately owned vehicle either.  a lot have a single parent who doesn't have a car and who works a lot of hours for not a lot of pay.  My older son has literally done his school work on the bench outside the public dental clinic waiting for his cousins.  

[LucyStoner]

Ok, all of this, and why does the school get to dictate my schedule anyway? What if I want to take my kid out to lunch after a doctor appointment? My kids don't belong to the school.

 

School is a service people avail themselves of. It's not educational neglect to miss a day of school.

 

I don't disagree with you but was instead poking at the supreme privilege of the worldview that says only "irresponsible" parents let their kids miss school for a dental appointment.  

[Pippen]

There are many reasons why a perfectly responsible adult will find they have to take a kid out of school for something as mundane as dental work.  There's distance, family size, access to coverage etc.  I'm pretty sure I have pulled my nephew out more than half a dozen times in a year and a half just for dental care.

 

Have you ever needed to rely on a public health clinic to get your son's needs met?  Have you ever even called a public health clinic for a rundown of their appointment polices?  By way of information, they don't offer you just anytime here, you take what is available from very limited, if any choices.  

 

Seriously, you clearly have no idea how difficult it can be for parents with limited access to care, for any myriad of reasons.  

 

I assure you, I can't just say "I would like to schedule this appointment on Tuesday the 17th at 3:50 so that these special snowflakes don't have to miss a moment of school and so they still can make it to their riding lessons!"  It's really a "you get what you get" situation.  Even if what you get is at 10AM and turns into a 4 hour wait.  Protip: pack snacks.  

 

My nephew needed a root canal.  Public health "doesn't do that".  You know how far the nearest place that does which takes state dental insurance and works on kids is?  It's over an hour from here if traffic is light and I don't live in the middle of nowhere either.   

 

Sadly, my niece and nephew are closer to "average" for public schools than one might think.  The number of kids on free lunch in their district is 40% and the number rises as high as 79% a district just a few short miles from some of the wealthiest enclaves on a well off metro area.  Everything takes longer when you have to access the cheapest options.  

 

Even with dental insurance there are reasons that necessitate my taking kids out of school for routine dental work. Dentists are booked very far in advance in my area so even if you're making an appointment 6 months out you're not assured a school holiday or before-or-after school time. Even if I can schedule at one of those times I'm not assured the kiddo will actually be available to go. If Jr. can't make his appointment because of a required band practice, etc. that wasn't announced when I made the appointment six months earlier, then we have to be flexible.

 

Added to that, our insurance requires 6 months in between cleanings or else they won't pay. 

[Bluegoat]

Sure, someone has a random leak.  Sure, it makes more sense to go home and change and go back.  But really how often does this happen to people?  I had very heavy irregular periods and knew to keep extra supplies with me.  I wore pads on days when I didn't need to, just in case.  Especially since there are so many ultra thin options now, or even using cloth if the person needs chemical free. If that doesn't work for the student, then make a medical plan with the nurse.  DD16 has the same issue that I did and doesn't think twice about it either. She plans ahead.  INfact her cheer coach is fighting for the girls to have the option to wear their cheer uniforms to school (skirt doesn't meet dress code) on game days.  It is a pristine white skirt, and dd is one of the girls helping to petition for it. Dealing with it is just a part of our lives.

 

The school has a rule and I guess, it isn't that big of a deal to me. If you know this may be a problem and don't want to miss a day...plan ahead.  If the only solution is to carry a change of clothes, then just do it.  It isn't a hard solution to come up with.  

 

If you don't want to hassle with that, it is understandable as well.  But then just accept the consequence that if you leak, you go home for the day.  Also not a life changing event. 

 

 

My work lets us carry a clear plastic bag into the pharmacy.  Anything else needs to be kept in the car. Ok, so if I had this problem and didn't want to have to clock out to go to my car, I would just carry a rolled up pair of pants in my bag. 

 

 

Maybe this is a big problem for some people, but if you routinely have unexpected leaks (extra heavy periods etc) then maybe the student needs to make a medical plan of action with the school for that situation.   There is often a solution if there is a real medical problem.  The school has to store medicine in case of emergency, maybe they could store a pair of pants for someone who has a medical note asking them to do so. 

 

This isn't just about leaks.  There are all kinds of things that can happen unexpectedly.  All you are saying is all students need a change of clothes, which they have no place to keep, all the time, for a stupid rule.

 

This kind of proliferation of idiotic regulation is a sign of seriously bad leadership.  It is never restricted to one thing, it always permeates the whole system - people that make up stupid rules about changing will also make up stupid rules about learning.  Bad rules aren't neutral, the harm the community, they are unjust to individuals, they inappropriately invoke authority.  These are not things people should get used to.

 

[Katy]

I only read the first 2 1/2 pages (my family keeps interrupting).  That all sounds annoying but the friend's daughter's situation would drive me bat crap crazy and that rule would be changed.  That is a public health issue.  They have mandated blood borne pathogen training at schools and they KNOW they are BREAKING THE LAW in regards to that, as well as violating her rights - both medically (it is no one's business that she's on her period), and in a sexually harassing way (refusing to let her deal properly with a normal physiological situation of being female?).  Oh heck no!

 

Please tell that mom that if she wants to attack that situation and the daughter's not too embarrassed to go public she should make a public facebook post about it.  I have friends who work for major media outlets (NBC, HuffPo, Distractify), and I bet all of them know someone who would love to write an article about that crap. If she posts it on facebook and has you post the link here and even 10% of us share it, it will go viral within 3 days.

[happypamama]

Our dentist books seven months out, minimum. Even when I don't care about day or time, and even when I make the next appointment as they're finishing up the current one, it's still a seven month wait, at least, because they are that busy (and they're that good, plus super efficient). So let's say I managed to book appointments for December and June to avoid school days/hours? Well, chances are that the June one would be followed by a January one, and that one would be followed by August, and that one would be followed by March. They don't offer evening or weekend hours. They do have a sign saying something about reserving certain hours, early ones, I think, for school children, but that's a lot of children to squeeze in there. It's just not always possible, no matter how much you want it to be.

 

If I had children in public school, I'd consider school to be their job. But I'd also be weighing things like traveling to see grandparents during holidays, and other things, and a straight A teenager missing one day of classes for a routine dental appointment would be so far down on my list of concerns that it wouldn't even be funny. (Then again, my parents once let me miss a day of school to spend it with my boyfriend, who was home for a very rare break from college. That was when parents could write a note, and the school would accept it, since I was already making top grades and wasn't absent often. I think they considered it to be a more useful investment of my time than sleeping through yet another chemistry class where I was acting the exams or sitting around in gym class, waiting for my two minutes in whatever sport we were doing at the time. Common sense need to prevail!)

[Bluegoat]

For goodness sakes, how long has school been in session? A week? Two weeks?

 

The school calendars are not secret. Need a teeth cleaning? Then schedule it before school starts. That is how responsible parents of school aged children deal.

 

This is crazy!

 

Bill

Are you actually reading the posts?  In many cases that is either not possible, or it isn't logical.

 

 

[Murmer]

For goodness sakes, how long has school been in session? A week? Two weeks?

 

The school calendars are not secret. Need a teeth cleaning? Then schedule it before school starts. That is how responsible parents of school aged children deal.

 

This is crazy!

 

Bill

 

Bill I totally understand your point but sadly there is more than 1 person involved in the equation especially with medical/dental stuff.  I just had this awful experience of trying to be the responsible parent and got screwed anyway.  I called in June to set up my kids well child appointments, the first day they open for appointments (can only be made 90 days before but must be more than 1 year after the previous appt due to insurance rules).  I set it up for before school started...then got a phone call in July that the Dr is on vacation and it has to change the appointment.  So I set it up for after school hours during the 1st week of school. Well 2 weeks ago I got a your Dr isn't available anymore for you appointment and the only times we have are November or 10 am the 1st day of school or the 3rd day...yep I am pulling out both of my kids the third day of school because they can't get us in even though I tried to get it before school started and after school hours.  Sadly even trying to work within the rules doesn't always work...and due to insurance rules now my kids well visits are going to be pushed back to later and later in the year. Which means continuing to miss school if the Dr isn't able to get them in after school.  So yes I tried to be responsible but between insurance rules and Dr issues I get screwed and my kids are missing school.

[Beebug123]

I went to high school over 20 years ago now and our school had a closed campus and lock-out policy. The teachers would physically lock the doors at the bell. If you were late you were locked out for the entire period and had to go sit in a lock-out room. Now, for several years I went once/twice a month for asthma appointments. I know that I was required to go in the mornings and my school started at 7:45 am. My mom always made them for 7am and many times I made it to school without being late. Many times I did not. I didn't have an option to go on the weekends as the place that was monitoring me wasn't open. The doctor/clinic excused me. The school excused me (ie didn't count the tardy against me) but still I would have to sit in the lockout room. This wasn't an inner city school, this was a school in a "nice" suburban community. Interestingly I looked up the school and they no longer have this policy.

[chiguirre]

Sometimes I wonder. Does your public school have rules like this?

No, and if they did, Geezle wouldn't be going to high school.

[TrixieB]

 

Schools here are going to similar rules like those, although not quite as bad in some ways.  Maybe worse in others, though.  

 

• You must have a doctor's notice for all absences (this is new, used to it was after 2 days) for them to be excused.  No exceptions.  5 unexcused absences in a school year means detention and possibly a truancy charge and appearing in court.  Your child may be held back even if their grades are all A's.

 

That policy is crazy and would really make me mad.  Say I couldn't get my kid into the doctor ($90) because the office was fully booked -- then I would have to take the kid to the urgent care ($200).  Plus I would miss work so wouldn't get paid.  I think I would tell my sick kid to go to school, and if they barfed or whatever, just hang out in the nurse's office for the rest of the day.  'Cause that way they'd be AT SCHOOL...

[LucyStoner]

That policy is crazy and would really make me mad.  Say I couldn't get my kid into the doctor ($90) because the office was fully booked -- then I would have to take the kid to the urgent care ($200).  Plus I would miss work so wouldn't get paid.  I think I would tell my sick kid to go to school, and if they barfed or whatever, just hang out in the nurse's office for the rest of the day.  'Cause that way they'd be AT SCHOOL...

 

The irony is that such policies just make kids sicker and less productive because stuff goes around more with people doing what they have to do and sending kids to school sick.  

 

And some illnesses are contagious and not ok to go to school with BUT are totally not something  for which you need to see a doctor.  Of course, taking such kids to the doctor spreads germs around there, potentially exposes your sick kid to something worse than they already have and besides costing money, it takes up valuable time for the HCPs.  "Yup, he's vomiting.  Yup, that's a fever.  Give him these OTC remedies and do this comfort care and call if it get's higher than 104." We could have just had this conversation on the phone and saved everyone some time, but I gotta bill my insurance $200 for a signature on a slip of paper to confirm what any sane person can see quite plainly.  

[NoPlaceLikeHome]

Wow. That is way over the top. Regarding absences, the only thing that bothers me about my daughter's school is that even with a note sent beforehand, a teacher can choose to ignore it if she is giving a test or quiz. I sent a note for my daughter to be picked up at a specific time so as to allow her to stay in school for as long as possible before we had to leave to a doctor's appointment. The teacher did not let my daughter leave at the beginning of class because she was planning on giving the students a pop quiz at the end of the lesson. I had to wait for over 30 minutes before she was dismissed, and we were late to the appointment.

There are no lunch rules at the high school. The middle school just implemented a rule that prohibits parents from dropping off fast food at the front office. They must now check in and deliver it to the students themselves, and the students are no longer allowed to share lunches. Apparently some parents were bringing pizzas and other fast food for their children as well as their friends.

Wow some doctor's offices will cancel your appointment and charge up for missed appointment if more than 15 minutes late. That policy of the school's is really unacceptable.

[Bluegoat]

I am also not sure why people think that somehow parents wanting to do this is new and causing school failures.  It was common when I was in school all the way through for kids to have to leave for appointments, and the parents say so was all that was required.  The school results were not worse - they were, if anything, better.

 

This seems like people who have totally lost their grip on education trying to maintain some kind of control, even if it is just wheels spinning.

[laundrycrisis]

IMO it will continue as long as parents put up with it.  The scope creep continues because it isn't resisted. 

[Word Nerd]

I have friends who work for major media outlets (NBC, HuffPo, Distractify), and I bet all of them know someone who would love to write an article about that crap. If she posts it on facebook and has you post the link here and even 10% of us share it, it will go viral within 3 days.

 

:svengo: Talk about mortifying! 

[Katy]

:svengo: Talk about mortifying! 

 

Meh.  It really depends on the personality of the girl.  Everyone goes through something like that at least once.  If she was taught that it is normal she might not be as self-conscious about the incident as she is angry that the school did that to her.

[Farrar]

Whenever I read these things, I'm always glad I wasn't in public school when it was like that. I wouldn't have had a good GPA and a load of AP's and gotten into a good college... instead, I would have ended up a dropout. No kidding. I always had absences. We didn't have health insurance so getting a doctor's note? My mother would have laughed in my face. I was bussed across county so the bus itself used to drop us off late enough that I would have apparently been marked absent for the whole day and not allowed into class sometimes. I would not have been a kid to put up with walking around with a giant bloodstain on my rear either. I would RATHER have been pulled into court for walking away from school. So it's good that I didn't have any of that to rebel against... my whole life would probably have come out pretty differently.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Whenever I read these things, I'm always glad I wasn't in public school when it was like that. I wouldn't have had a good GPA and a load of AP's and gotten into a good college... instead, I would have ended up a dropout. No kidding. I always had absences. We didn't have health insurance so getting a doctor's note? My mother would have laughed in my face. I was bussed across county so the bus itself used to drop us off late enough that I would have apparently been marked absent for the whole day and not allowed into class sometimes. I would not have been a kid to put up with walking around with a giant bloodstain on my rear either. I would RATHER have been pulled into court for walking away from school. So it's good that I didn't have any of that to rebel against... my whole life would probably have come out pretty differently.

 

That is my daily question: What makes the children stay in school? I also would have been gone, long gone.

[chiguirre]

Meh.  It really depends on the personality of the girl.  Everyone goes through something like that at least once.  If she was taught that it is normal she might not be as self-conscious about the incident as she is angry that the school did that to her.

The thing is that this is a totally normal situation. I'd venture to guess that's happened to 90% of girls at some point in their school years.

[Little Nyssa]

At our PS (middle school) they don't have rules like in the OP-- but they do have miscommunication and cranky office staff.

Examples:

1. Written nstructions to parents say that lace-up shoes are required for gym. Fair enough, I thought. So we went out & bought a new pair. Yes, first gym class DS found out that they weren't required. In this case I complained to the assistant principal and got an apology and a correction.

2. Went to the front desk to hand in DS's meds. Secretary informed me there was no record of him needing any meds, and if he did, he would have to carry them around with him since they never keep meds in the office. I told her that I had just spoken to the school nurse who had his documents in her hand and told us to bring the meds to the office. I could not believe that a sixth grader would have to carry Benadryl and an inhaler with him-- which are only for emergencies, not for daily use. Secretary was quite snippy and refused to believe this. I really began to feel hot under the collar. Afterwards I spoke to the nurse who said the secretary was flat out wrong and we would go with our original plan. But why did Secretary have to be so rude? Honestly, just a little bit of power, the ability to sit behind a desk, can go to anyone's head.

 

My advice to everyone is go to the PTA for these issues. Those ladies know how to take charge!

[Joker]

For goodness sakes, how long has school been in session? A week? Two weeks?

The school calendars are not secret. Need a teeth cleaning? Then schedule it before school starts. That is how responsible parents of school aged children deal.

 

This is crazy!

 

Bill

 

My dds have already been in school four weeks and will continue through the first week of June. They both will have a regular dental cleaning during that period. One will have ortho visits every four to six weeks as well. Every single parent wants after school or school break appointments. There are only so many and you have to take what you can get. My other dd has anxiety issues and needs to see her therapist every two weeks. Again, there are only so many school day/break friendly appointments and I can't get them all. You also have to realize there is usually only one non working (or one who can get off) parent and so sometimes the child without the appointment needs to tag along due to timing and distance. Then, when you add in actual sick time that doesn't need a doctor's visit, one can easily accumulate more absences than a school desires. That doesn't make me an irresponsible parent. It actually makes me a very responsible one that puts my children's needs and health above the ridiculous policies of some random administrator.

[Farrar]

That is my daily question: What makes the children stay in school? I also would have been gone, long gone.

 

For real.

 

I get the idea that school is your job. And that some people work crap jobs where they get no respect and have very limited ability to get time off. But that doesn't then lead me to think that therefore it's okay if school treats kids like prisoners. As pointed out, even crap jobs tend to have a day off and unlike in school, it's isn't the exact same day everyone else has off meaning that getting a routine medical appointment that day is nigh on impossible. The thing about the girl and the period stain reminded me of this article about menstuation in prison.

[abba12]

Just sayin, if I went to a place, and asked for my child because of a family emergency, and they said 'you'll have to wait another half hour, we aren't going to release her or allow you to go to her' I would blow my top. NO ONE has the right to withhold my child from me (except child services i guess.... but that's different). How dare anyone say that *I* am not allowed to take *MY* child out for a family emergency. I'm suprised so many people are commenting on the other rules, without much comment about this one. Is it legal for them to refuse to allow the child to leave or be taken by their parent? That becomes holding someone against their will doesn't it? 

 

I'll add these to the list of reasons I am SO glad I homeschool... 

[Joker]

Just sayin, if I went to a place, and asked for my child because of a family emergency, and they said 'you'll have to wait another half hour, we aren't going to release her or allow you to go to her' I would blow my top. NO ONE has the right to withhold my child from me (except child services i guess.... but that's different). How dare anyone say that *I* am not allowed to take *MY* child out for a family emergency. I'm suprised so many people are commenting on the other rules, without much comment about this one. Is it legal for them to refuse to allow the child to leave or be taken by their parent? That becomes holding someone against their will doesn't it? 

 

I'll add these to the list of reasons I am SO glad I homeschool... 

 

I've actually never had that happen. Even during times they have it in writing that I cannot pick up my child, I have been able to. I've never been refused and do not know anyone who has been.

 

 

ETA: I've never tried during a lock down, though, and we only just had our first one. I didn't try to pick them up because I knew the school was locked down for their safety. We had a police chase and the suspect fled on foot right by younger dd's school. I would hope no one was able to get in or out while they were getting that guy.

[Word Nerd]

The thing is that this is a totally normal situation. I'd venture to guess that's happened to 90% of girls at some point in their school years.

 

I still wouldn't want to have to walk around school displaying evidence of that totally normal situation or have the incident go viral.

[OneStepAtATime]

Mom used to be able to sign me out as needed and there was no fuss.  I made up the work, the teachers weren't bothered 'cause they knew I would make up the work, I was extremely quiet leaving so as not to disrupt the class and the school respected Mom's judgement on whether I needed to be out of school or not.  She did not pull me out lightly but sometimes it really couldn't be helped.  I had some health issues that required periodic testing so it really wasn't something we could skip.  We were at the mercy of the doctor's schedule and they absolutely expected the school to release me when I needed to go.  It really wasn't a big deal for the teachers, my mom or the administration of the school.  Mom and the school worked in partnership to balance my academic and medical needs.  

 

I am really wondering why things seem to be changing so much, at least in certain areas.  Is there really that much truancy, as some have said?  And if so, what is the underlying cause of the increased truancy?  Creating extremely rigid and inflexible rules doesn't actually seem to address the reason that more and more kids must be skipping school.  Or is that really why these rules are becoming stricter and stricter?  I think it is more multifaceted than that, TBH.

[chiguirre]

I still wouldn't want to have to walk around school displaying evidence of that totally normal situation

 

Exactly, that's why the school's policy is so completely nuts. This happens to almost every girl at some point so it shouldn't be so hard for school personnel to understand.

 

 

or have the incident go viral.

 

If no one shames the school for their idiocy, they won't change their policy.

 

[Spy Car]

Are you actually reading the posts?  In many cases that is either not possible, or it isn't logical.

 

In the OPs case she had all summer to make an appointment.

 

If you know the kids are back in school in August, make the dental cleaning before that. Simple.

 

The people who deserve to vent are the teachers and administrators of the school who have to deal with this sort of crap.

 

Bill

[Spy Car]

Why is it crazy?  If someone had their appointment in August, their next one will be in February.  It is easy to schedule one cleaning on an off time, but it's very hard to get both of them scheduled on off days.  If you read what the OP said they do one in the summer, but the other is, of course, during the school year.  The dentist appointment in question was during last school year and she is concerned about the rule change since her kid will be due for another cleaning in a few months.

 

July-December. During school breaks. Not hard to figure.

 

Bill

[Katy]

I still wouldn't want to have to walk around school displaying evidence of that totally normal situation or have the incident go viral.

 

Personality difference.  I would have happily gone on every major morning show to talk about the injustice being done to me and every other girl in that school district until the policy changed.  Then I would have written my college application essays on fighting injustice (I was sure I wanted to be a lawyer back then...  until I found out what a lawyer's life is really like).

 

I sort of did do something like that, actually, albeit a less inflammatory issue and I didn't have to go to the media.  A meeting with the principal was enough.

[mom2scouts]

I had kids in public school for many years and I watched as more and more ridiculous rules were put into place over the years. By the time I pulled my younger kids to homeschool, I was getting a pretty bad attitude about the how much authority the school felt they had over my children.  My friends in a neighboring upper middle class school district have told me that the schools are getting crazy about absences from school.  They don't even care if the child is getting excellent grades and makes up missed work.  I think much of it is related to money because our schools get funded by daily attendance numbers.

 

The policy of not allowing students to leave would drive me crazy. I always arranged my pickup to allow my children to have as much time in class while still getting to the appointment in time.  Forcing me to wait until a class change would make me late and I hate to be late for anything.

[Farrar]

In the OPs case she had all summer to make an appointment.

 

If you know the kids are back in school in August, make the dental cleaning before that. Simple.

 

The people who deserve to vent are the teachers and administrators of the school who have to deal with this sort of crap.

 

Bill

 

I'm glad your dentist has such availability. We called ours in spring. They could not schedule us until September or October. I tried to schedule the kids' well appointments on a day that worked for us... only to find that if we wanted to get in not more than three months late for their birthday, we needed to pick one of just a couple of dates. Luckily, we can. But can you not see that some people try to make the days off work and simply cannot?

[mommaduck]

Spycar, if I remember correctly, you have ONE child and life in a very metro area (loads of options, more availability, public transit, etc). MANY of us here do NOT have these things.

[LucyStoner]

July-December. During school breaks. Not hard to figure.

 

Bill

So who exactly do you reckon the dentist is seeing when school is in session? Elderly people? Affluent parents whose kids go to school all day and have jobs they can afford to take a hour off of? Toddlers? What about the pediatric dentists? Most of the private kids dentists here are open 3-5 days M-F and close by 4 or 5 in the afternoon. Some have a handful of evening or weekend hours, though to the best of my knowledge NONE of the ones taking state insurance have weekend or evening hours.

 

The public dental clinic here sees kids, pregnant women and a very limited number of non-pregnant disabled or elderly adults with emergency issues. Mostly kids for routine and preventative care. They are open mainly during school hours. When do you think people see them? During school hours. They are booked back to back and you don't get on the schedule just any time you want. Or even any month you want.

[EmseB]

In the OPs case she had all summer to make an appointment.

 

If you know the kids are back in school in August, make the dental cleaning before that. Simple.

 

The people who deserve to vent are the teachers and administrators of the school who have to deal with this sort of crap.

 

Bill

 

The crap of people going to the dentist during the day when dentists work?  Of having some sort of life outside of school?  School is not life.  School is a part of life.  Should everything operate on the inverse of bank hours in order to not give teachers and administrators the crap of their students having other things to do during the day (occassionally) between the hours of 8-3?

 

People have appointments.  Kids are people.  School is not more or less important than going to the doctor or the dentist.

 

[Spy Car]

The crap of people going to the dentist during the day when dentists work?  Of having some sort of life outside of school?  School is not life.  School is a part of life.  Should everything operate on the inverse of bank hours in order to not give teachers and administrators the crap of their students having other things to do during the day (occassionally) between the hours of 8-3?

 

People have appointments.  Kids are people.  School is not more or less important than going to the doctor or the dentist.

 

 

For routine teeth cleanings? Bullroar!

 

Bill

[Tanaqui]

For goodness sakes, how long has school been in session? A week? Two weeks?

 

The school calendars are not secret. Need a teeth cleaning? Then schedule it before school starts. That is how responsible parents of school aged children deal.

 

This is crazy!

 

Bill

 

You've said this three times now. I think we're all familiar with your argument. We simply don't agree with it. I know for a fact that it is impossible to get a summer appointment at my pediatrician unless you schedule it back in February. Why? Because everybody tries it your way! And plenty of people who attempt to schedule these necessary appointments "before school starts" are simply unable to because there are no more appointment slots left. The same thing applies to the dentist, and the optometrist, and the orthodontist. There are more kids than doctors.

 

Instead of repeating yourself, why not address the counter argument? It'd certainly make this thread more interesting.

[Tanaqui]

People have appointments.  Kids are people.  School is not more or less important than going to the doctor or the dentist.

For routine teeth cleanings? Bullroar!

 

These are the words of somebody who didn't see his sister lose her two front teeth at the age of 26*. Routine medical care is important. And while I'm glad that you are able to fit in all your routine appointments into narrow windows of vacation time, not everybody is so fortunate.

 

I know it grieves you to think that there are parents out there who are marginally less perfect than you, but believe me, it is true. You'll just have to pity us. Pray, do not laugh at us.

 

* Lack of adequate dental care was 50% of the equation. The other 50% is heredity. Regardless, you better believe that I treat our twice-yearly dental appointments Very Seriously. Yes, I do believe tooth cleaning is more important than school. You can make up a day's worth of school. You can't grow your adult teeth back.

[EmseB]

For routine teeth cleanings? Bullroar!

 

Bill

I honestly can't think of anything I did in school that was so vital it couldn't have been missed for a dental appointment. I missed in class discussion on one chapter of Catcher in the Rye? Had to borrow someone's notes from trig? Horror!

 

We are pretty dang rigorous about school around here, I don't like having one day a week off for something like co-op, and I'm often baffled by people who manage to do park days, co-ops, Bible studies, etc...It doesn't compute for me how those people actually get school done. But a dentist or doc appointment? Once every six months? Why do you care so much about when other people are able or willing to get that stuff done?

 

 

But clearly you have a thing about school attendance that seems to trump the rest of life's incidentals, so you're free to insist upon that level of rigidity for your children.

[Spy Car]

These are the words of somebody who didn't see his sister lose her two front teeth at the age of 26*. Routine medical care is important. And while I'm glad that you are able to fit in all your routine appointments into narrow windows of vacation time, not everybody is so fortunate.

 

I know it grieves you to think that there are parents out there who are marginally less perfect than you, but believe me, it is true. You'll just have to pity us. Pray, do not laugh at us.

 

* Lack of adequate dental care was 50% of the equation. The other 50% is heredity. Regardless, you better believe that I treat our twice-yearly dental appointments Very Seriously. Yes, I do believe tooth cleaning is more important than school. You can make up a day's worth of school. You can't grow your adult teeth back.

 

What are you talking about???!!!

 

Of course one should attend to dental needs. Just get regular cleaning taken care of when school in not in session. Sheez.

 

Bill

[Tanaqui]

What are you talking about???!!!

 

Of course one should attend to dental needs. Just get regular cleaning taken care of when school in not in session. Sheez.

 

Bill

 

That is something we often hear, and it certainly is an interesting opinion.

[Audrey]

Sounds like prison rules to me. 

 

In other words... their policy is bullshit.

[Spy Car]

I honestly can't think of anything I did in school that was so vital it couldn't have been missed for a dental appointment. I missed in class discussion on one chapter of Catcher in the Rye? Had to borrow someone's notes from trig? Horror!

 

We are pretty dang rigorous about school around here, I don't like having one day a week off for something like co-op, and I'm often baffled by people who manage to do park days, co-ops, Bible studies, etc...It doesn't compute for me how those people actually get school done. But a dentist or doc appointment? Once every six months? Why do you care so much about when other people are able or willing to get that stuff done?

 

 

But clearly you have a thing about school attendance that seems to trump the rest of life's incidentals, so you're free to insist upon that level of rigidity for your children.

 

You bet. My kid doesn't miss school without good cause. It is called being a responsible parent.

 

Irresponsible people are the root of the problem with tough attendance policies. Making a dental cleaning after school starts (instead of the weeks and months before) is not excusable. Then to "vent" about it? Absurd!

 

Bill

[LucyStoner]

For routine teeth cleanings? Bullroar!

 

Bill

So it's ok to miss for a root canal or filling but not for preventative care? What's that they say? Something about an ounce of prevention and a pound of cure? Better a meticulously regular cleaning than needing a third crown before your permanent teeth are 2 years erupted.

[Audrey]

In the OPs case she had all summer to make an appointment.

 

If you know the kids are back in school in August, make the dental cleaning before that. Simple.

 

The people who deserve to vent are the teachers and administrators of the school who have to deal with this sort of crap.

 

Bill

 

 

The policy is wholly restrictive and punitive.  The teachers and administrators are not wardens of the children.  If a parent wants to take the child out of school for the day, that is the parent's prerogative and the wishes and needs of the teachers and administrators are 100% irrelevant to that.  They are not the parent and have no right to supersede the parent's authority.  I call bullshit on the school.  Big heaping, steaming semi loads of bullshit.