Do you NOT use the library?

[Hunter]

I made the mistake of ordering a couple ILL items months ago. They came in and I never picked them up, because I don't need them MONTHS later. Now, my account says I have them and didn't bring them back and is charging me $1.00 a day per item.

 

Worse yet the library froze my account so I couldn't renew any books online and ran up some avoidable fines because they froze my account. And they locked me out of even being able to SEE my digital account, never mind being able to use it.

 

I've got my account unfrozen, and some books renewed, but I have to wait till Monday to try and straighten things out. I had the hardest time getting someone to even do what they could without the ILL people there.

 

:banghead:

 

Now, I just want to bring back all my books, cancel all my holds, and take ANOTHER library break. That is limiting though. But...using the library sometimes is so overwhelming for me. I know I overreact to any situations involving authority figures and control issues and situations that are quickly getting worse, because of my PTSD. Dealing with library staff is triggering for me, and it just doesn't help when much of the staff doesn't speak English well.

 

Part of me is telling myself to suck it up and just DEAL. And part of me is just telling myself I don't NEED the library, so why put myself through this.

 

I've taken library breaks before. And then I start using it more and more until I have another mess that is easier to just pay my way out of than to fight my way out.

 

I'm just curious if others take library breaks, because it just isn't worth the hassle.

 

I know some people don't use the library because of bed bug issues.

[Dmmetler]

I've moved to almost exclusively using e-checkout. My local library really doesn't have many books that are useful for school anyway, so it's mostly extra reading material for DD and I, and with e-checkout it automatically returns itself after X days. We used the library a lot more when DD was still in the picture book stage, because those just aren't the same on a kindle.

 

 

[SorrelZG]

I don't use the library because I don't live near one. :tongue_smilie:

[Moxie]

I know a family that buys all their books because Dad is a germaphobe. They have financial help from grandparents and they don't read that much.

[Hunter]

I've moved to almost exclusively using e-checkout. My local library really doesn't have many books that are useful for school anyway, so it's mostly extra reading material for DD and I, and with e-checkout it automatically returns itself after X days. We used the library a lot more when DD was still in the picture book stage, because those just aren't the same on a kindle.

That is what I was doing for awhile. Just using the downloads. It's much safer. And then, I don't know what happened. I started using again. :lol: I feel like I'm talking about using drugs.

[EKS]

I don't use the library (even when actively homeschooling) because I'm just not organized enough to do it.  The only exception was when my younger son was in the picture book/early reader stage and I got a few dozen books each week for him.

[Hunter]

I don't use the library because I don't live near one. :tongue_smilie:

 

:grouphug:

 

I know a family that buys all their books because Dad is a germaphobe. They have financial help from grandparents and they don't read that much.

I have a student who wouldn't touch library books without gloves. :lol: And she would look at them if I held them and she didn't have to get too close.

[Hunter]

I don't use the library (even when actively homeschooling) because I'm just not organized enough to do it. The only exception was when my younger son was in the picture book/early reader stage and I got a few dozen books each week for him.

It's the picture books that are so enticing. The phrase, "A picture tells a thousand words" is so true.

 

I'm in self-imposed rehab NOT to read teaching theory books, so I don't need those right now. But the picture books is the hard part.

[Um_2_4]

Nope, don't use them. Limited selection, huge fees, etc. AND they never (or rarely) have the books I want...

We don't even have ILL as an option.

 

I budget $x per month for the local thrift store (my kids call it the used book store LOL) and we find TONS there. On sale days or with a 20% off coupon, I often pay .30-.50 per book (for picture to chapter to reference books).

I think some other homeschoolers must donate books there, because I find a lot from reading lists I see in there.

I even found big ones like DK and kingfisher reference books.

 

[Karen in CO]

I've had a love-hate relationship with the library since I had kids.  Now we can't use it at all because of life-threatening food allergies.  My allergic child can't use a book that has been used by someone eating nuts or peanuts.  After a couple of book-induced reactions, we quit all used books at home.  

[texasmama]

I have never used the library with homeschooling.  We live on the very edge of a large county in an unincorporated part so we technically don't have access to a library free.  But I got a city library card when living with my parents many years ago.   However, it is 20 minutes to the large library.  I could pay for access to smaller, closer libraries in the next county, but I don't want to deal with the fees, the fines, and the hassle of keeping track of books.  I frequent the clearance section of Half Price Books and use my educator's discount card. 

[ajfries]

We live in a really small town & our library is incredibly lame. The books are not cataloged in any way; you have to depend on the librarian's memory as to whether or not they have a certain book. And to top it off, she's incredibly annoying. Every time I ask her if they have X book, she says, "I don't think so...but we do have Y." And Y is a completely unrelated book. If I want a Magic School Bus book on seeds, for example, she suggests the Magic School Bus book on planets. I'm not even kidding. It happens all the time. Thanks but no thanks.

 

On the plus side, the librarian isn't organized enough to charge late fees. So there's that.

[Pawz4me]

We rarely used the library when we were homeschooling, and I rarely use it for books I want to read.  We are fortunate that we can afford to buy books, and it's much easier and less of a hassle to do so.

[stripe]

I'm just curious if others take library breaks, because it just isn't worth the hassle.

I periodically get overwhelmed by all the library books I've got out, take back masses of them, and slow down. This time it's because two women had a fit and carried on because they decided I wasn't moving my car, when actually I was trying to. I hate my library's parking lot.

[Mandylubug]

DH has banned me from library usage. However, it is because I'm horrible at remembering to return them.  We would check out 40 at a time and then renew online as many times as allowed ( i think 3 times maybe twice) but I would still forget since the library isnt near anything else and 20 minutes from home....i paid 300 bucks in fines last year :( 

[~Anna~]

I stopped using the library for books due to my germ issues, but I was going to use them for movies and Teaching Company lectures.  But, I have had one Teaching Company course on request since January, and I still don't have it.  I would almost just rather buy it myself at that rate!

[jar7709]

I use it rarely. Our closest library is the size of a postage stamp. I can request ILL from the county system, and I do once in a while, but that usually requires more planning and patience than I generally possess. Especially since the wait lists for in-demand books are often long, and I am picky about what we use and they just as often don't have what I want.

So I end up buying most of ours. I am fortunate that I have the budget, which I make stretch farther by buying used. Someone told me once that buying books is an investment, I make that rationalization with myself often. ;)

[eternalsummer]

I have a 1 year old who loves to eat books, and I am totally irresponsible about turning books back in on time (or ever).  It is cheaper, in the long run, to just buy the books from amazon or the thrift store.

[redsquirrel]

Well, my dh is a librarian so I can't imagine not using a library, lol. But he works for a large academic library, not a public library, so the sorts of books I can get from his work are not 'kid' books. And we can get books for 6 months at a time with indefinite renewal until it is recalled. It starts coming in very handy starting in about 5th or 6th grade. But, I do get a large number of read alouds from there as well. They have a large selection of children's books, but I suspect I am the only person who checks them out.

 

We do have a fantastic public library system here and I use it often but I have friends who don't. I have a friend who will flat out tell you that she isn't organized enough to use the public library. She loses books or spills stuff on them all the time. She has broken DVDs and lost single CDs from audio books. And, yeah, the rest of her life is like that as well, lol. She was spending a fortune on lost fees and replacement fees and overdue fees...none of which she disputed. She decided it was better to just stop using the library and spend the $$ on what she needs. I also don't loan her anything because she is very upfront that it will get trashed. I accidentally left my cheap booster seat in her car. I saw it at her place a couple weeks later and decided it was better to just buy a new one. Somehow mine is now covered in paint.  :lol:

[NoseInABook]

I do library breaks too when I get tired of late fees and having to run back and forth. But I always return. I've had a card since I was 5, I can't help myself. 

[Hunter]

I am SO anxious today! This thing with the library was obviously only ONE part of the anxiety, but it really put me over the edge and started the day off so badly. I haven't been able to get things back on track. Just–UGH! The other main trigger is just too weird to discuss, and involves bagels–yup bagels. People are just SO weird! At least MY people anyway.

 

I think I need to plan a library break. Noseinabook, I know I'll end out back there, too. :) I think I need a break, though.

 

I've got plenty of books here and I even have a gift card for Amazon. A friend is doing some sort of medical research and is getting Amazon cards as part of his payment, that he doesn't want–or is pretending he doesn't want. I feel really guilty buying books with blood money–literally blood money. It feels weird. He sells his blood for museum tickets for other people. I think he thinks this is all funny; I don't know.

 

This is all probably too much information. :lol:

 

 

[VeteranMom]

My dh won't let me use the library anymore. One of us had to have some sense about the whole situation!! :laugh:  It always SOUNDED like a good idea to request books, go in and pick them up, and return them when they were due. It just never seemed to work out that way. I truly believe that if I had continued, the library would have been able to eventually fund a new wing on one of their buildings- just with the money I was paying in late charges.  It's just easier to order a used copy of a book off of Amazon and have it delivered right to my door.

[abba12]

I definitely think you need a library break. As a fellow PTSD sufferer, the library isn't worth it! I've learnt a lot lately about being ok with letting go of hard things. 

 

Library isn't a trigger for me, but I still don't use it much. I hated, as a kid, trying to read a series of books and the library missing a few, or someone not returning the next one. Hated it. Or having a favourite book I wanted to reread and not owning it, especially things like science experiment books. And I prefer to have books at home to strew and which the kids can get into. We have just begun using the library again because it is around the corner from DHs work, but it is purely for topical and fluff reading. For example, DD was very interested in bees and honey. I don't particularly want 10 picture books about bees in my library, so I bought a couple of good quality ones (a national geographic reader and a big book about bugs, I think it was a DK one) from amazon, and then got on the library e-catalogue and reserved about 10 general bee books. It was enough to satisfy her curiosity, I got the best ones in my library for next time (one of the borrowed books was actually very good and part of a series so I am thinking of buying the series now)

 

I never use the ILL system, takes WAY too long and is way too much effort.

[Hunter]

I have enough trouble doing my job right. But there is nothing I can do, to get the library to do THEIR job right. They are SO amazingly incompetent.

 

My library is one of the largest in the country and I know many would think I have MORE, but really I have less. I'm not even going to get into the reasons why. It's just a sad state of affairs.

 

And when their incompetence gets surreal, then I'm not even believed. And then I get stuck with the fees, unless I'm up for a fight.

 

I used to go to the closest library in an adjoining city to get my ILL items, but that gets old quickly. And confusing about which books are from where.

[Hunter]

I definitely think you need a library break. As a fellow PTSD sufferer, the library isn't worth it! I've learnt a lot lately about being ok with letting go of hard things.

 

Library isn't a trigger for me, but I still don't use it much. I hated, as a kid, trying to read a series of books and the library missing a few, or someone not returning the next one. Hated it. Or having a favourite book I wanted to reread and not owning it, especially things like science experiment books. And I prefer to have books at home to strew and which the kids can get into. We have just begun using the library again because it is around the corner from DHs work, but it is purely for topical and fluff reading. For example, DD was very interested in bees and honey. I don't particularly want 10 picture books about bees in my library, so I bought a couple of good quality ones (a national geographic reader and a big book about bugs, I think it was a DK one) from amazon, and then got on the library e-catalogue and reserved about 10 general bee books. It was enough to satisfy her curiosity, I got the best ones in my library for next time (one of the borrowed books was actually very good and part of a series so I am thinking of buying the series now)

 

I never use the ILL system, takes WAY too long and is way too much effort.

It's silly how triggering the library is. Because of staff incompetence, I never know when there is going to be a sudden and expensive episode, setting off the whole unpredictable trigger. And the inability to find an English speaking person with the competence and authority to take care of the situation sets off the lack of impact trigger. And not being believed is the worst one. UGH!

[llifeon18wheels]

We are truck drivers and never home so no library for us.

[twoxcell]

I took a library break for about 3-4 years. It was just too much of a hassle going there with babies and toddlers. Now that my youngest is 4 and well behaved we started going back last fall and I am loving it. I have never had to pay any fees though. I hate confrontation so I understand how you feel. :)

[Caclcoca]

We do use the library a lot, but there are times that I get overwhelmed and return all of our books (read or not).  Then we will take 2-3 weeks off.  I will say that the library closest to us is small, but the staff is excellent. 

[scrapbabe]

Nope, don't use them. Limited selection, huge fees, etc. AND they never (or rarely) have the books I want...

We don't even have ILL as an option.

 

.

Yep. This. Except there is an ILL option but to even request one is a large fee, and that doesn't mean they'll get it.

[scrapbabe]

Oops

[guilfordlake]

I use the library primarily to preview books.  If I haven't read the book or if I don't remember it, checking it out from the library allows me to make sure the book is worth purchasing.  It usually is.  There have only been a few books I decided I didn't want to buy.

 

Jennifer

[blondchen]

Our local public library has been awesome for picture books, but if I were dependent on it for school stuff I'd be up the creek. It has almost nothing listed in either SOTW or BFSU, and I rely heavily on the living book suggestions for BFSU especially. Thankfully, we have access to a college library with 2-day ILL, and that has been great. Not sure what we'll do once DH finishes his degree...probably spend a lot more money on school books!

[plumshadow]

We've recently moved to a rural area with an underwhelming library selection but a surprisingly awesome story time and even though I paid the money to use the better library in the city I still find myself checking out books from the country library as well. If remembering to return books to 1 library is daunting try juggling two!! The country library has a bad habit of re-shelving books before scanning them in :glare: yeah that's fun to sort out.....

[CrunchyGirl]

Our library is okay. Picture book selection is good but I am very unimpressed now that LegoMan is deep into chapter books. 95% are straight twaddle. Also he has a rough time finding books he wants to read. It works better to request books and then just go pick them up. I feel like taking him there and having him browse is just a huge waste of time and frustrates us both.

 

I was just telling my spouse last night that I'd like to just figure out a weekly budget for used books on Amazon (or occasionally if I find something that the thrift store). I'd like to invest in lots of bookshelves and lots of good books.

[LaughingCat]

I LOVE my library  --  but I had a couple big library employee flubs lately that brought home to me that I am 'at their mercy' for employee mistakes while a book or dvd shows as being 'in my care' -- like books being shelved without being checked in (all 30+ I turned in one time) - or dvd cases being empty or missing 1 dvd when I check it out (fortunately that one is under my control - so I'm checking all dvd's are there before checking them out nowadays instead of after).  Also fortunately the employee's have all been reasonable people.  I would totally being taking a break from the library right now if they hadn't been.

 

 

[ByGrace3]

Every year I go through the same cycle-- avoid the library at all costs-- buy all the books I can-- break down and finally go to the library. 6 days late at .25 /day = $35 that somehow gets extra fees and ends up $70-- I avoid the library for another year -- until I forget how much I hate the library and start the vicious cycle again...

[Woodland Mist Academy]

We haven't for years. We moved from an area with a terrible ILL system. They didn't have most of the books I wanted, and after the first 2 or 3 book requests they charged for the ILL. It made more sense time-wise and financially to buy the books used. We tried Paperbackswap, which was fantastic at first, but then it was a constant battle with book problems: smoke, water damage, writing, etc.

 

My daughter also rereads, so it's nice to have books in the house, especially since she is past the picture book stage.  We have Kindles now for some of our books. Wonderful for all the free classics and the daily/monthly Kindle deals.

 

I can understand in a small way, Hunter. I loved the library growing up, but had some rough times there as an adult. The librarians would hassle my daughter about the joining the book program every.single.time we went because of the number and type of the books she checked out. Every.single.time I would need to explain to the librarian and my daughter that I didn't think junk food, junk toys, or junk books, were appropriate rewards for reading. I also thought it encouraged quick reading of easier books. It came to the point that I had to brace myself for the onslaught. I had to summon the courage just to walk through the doors. When I realized most of the library teen times revolved around watching movies, I decided that the goals of our local library were not compatible with mine.

 

I haven't even searched out the local libraries since we moved to our new location. I would imagine they are much, much better, but we are out of the library habit and have our own book routines.

 

:grouphug:

[kathkath]

I love the library and have accepted lost books fees and fines as part of the "membership fee." As my mother always says, anything you pay to the library goes towards a good cause. It still can be annoying but that's life.

[Woodland Mist Academy]

Our library is okay. Picture book selection is good but I am very unimpressed now that LegoMan is deep into chapter books. 95% are straight twaddle. Also he has a rough time finding books he wants to read. It works better to request books and then just go pick them up. I feel like taking him there and having him browse is just a huge waste of time and frustrates us both.

 

This.

[Ellie]

We went to the library weekly for many years. We all checked out as many books as we wanted, or none at all, but all books had to be returned the following Wednesday whether or not they had been read. It was the only way I could avoid over-due fines. :blushing:

 

I almost never requested anything, though. 

[sagira]

I am surprised that so many people I know don't even use our library. They tell me that they forget to return books. I am amazed and almost shocked, as these women are ten times more organized than I am at home (you should see my mess!) and are "together" in so many other ways than I am, yet little old me goes online all the time with four accounts (DH, me, DS, and DD) and juggles multiple ILLs, gets e-mails about books that are due and ready to be picked up, and save lots of money by not having to buy books. 

 

As for Hunter, I feel your pain. I have a small library about a mile from my house, and I would get a call if I didn't pick up an ILL. I also get e-mails from Library Elf, the library's e-mail list. That would not have happened to me in our library system. Our library system is so small that ILLs are used often. The only issue is getting them back on time.

 

So in short, no, I cannot imagine NOT using the library.

[lmrich]

I love the library. I can not go inside of it. It has fluorescent lights and a patterned carpet and triggers a migraine. I used to reserve books online and have my kids run in and get them, but they would not let my kids pick up my books. So oh well.

[Hunter]

Before my divorce, I used to go to a little library in the neighboring town and borrowed several ILL items each week. I kept it all straight, for the most part, and any fees I did run up were well worth it.

 

I have memory issues now due to some brain damage from the seizures and just general PTSD stuff, but really the problem isn't my memory. It's the LIBRARY staff's inefficiency. And my inability to interact with them without getting sick.

 

I had a chance to talk to my only friend I still have from before the divorce, who knew me and my life before, and also knows the city and building I'm now living in. She was in hysterics hearing about yesterday and made me feel better about totally melting down and coming to a complete halt. She makes me feel better that my reactions are a "normal reactions to an abnormal situation" and are quite logical and not shameful.

 

I need to just calm down and not turn this into a black and white situation. Using the library doesn't need to be an all or nothing situation. I can't use ILL at this library, though. I just can't. Expensive problems are the norm, rather than the exception. I need to figure out how much I can handle and only use the library for what I can handle, and use other people to advocate for me when a problem gets too big. And when I get overwhelmed take a TEMPORARY break till I get back on my feet.

[sagira]

I'm sorry you have PTSD problems, Hunter. That must be so rough. Sending you a virtual hug here.

[Hunter]

I'm sorry you have PTSD problems, Hunter. That must be so rough. Sending you a virtual hug here.

 

Here's one back at you. :grouphug:

 

I just had a conversation with a friend today who is resigned but still annoyed with my PTSD. It's hard because most of the time I'm so shaming with myself; I don't need it from others. I had just been thinking that if I had a bad limp and I'd started the day off with a fall, I and everyone else would have expected the day to stop or at least slow down. I shared that with him, and he immediately got mad and told me I obviously don't know how hard it is to limp. Sigh! I ended the conversation right there. The guy doesn't even has a permanent limp, so it's not like l even triggered a sore spot.

 

PTSD is an INJURY. It's not imaginary even if it's invisible. Injuries have to be paced. They just do. Caaaaause, they are REAL.

[CafeDiem]

I'm going through a similar library issue atm too. We were on vacation and I returned most of our books (all that ones that would come due) before leaving. I came home to find huge overdue charges, two books that I'm almost 100% positive that I returned apparently missing, both from ILL program, and recieved little help from the staff. They made one phone call to the other lilbrary, said I must not have returned them, and then just renewed the books for another week. So I have two days to come up with the missing books... that I can't prove I turned in but I don't have at home either. Grrr. I tend to think of late fees that are my fault as library donations... but buying books altogether because of misplacement on their part or mine does drive me crazy! It will probably be quite a long time before we use the library again after I get this mess straightened out. I agree... too much stress.

[Word Nerd]

I use two libraries regularly and have never had any problems that would make me quit using them. At our previous city, I had a couple of items that showed up on my account as checked out even though I had turned them back in. It was no big deal to get it straightened out with an email or call saying, "I turned that back in at XYZ branch on 123 date. Please check again." If a library misplaced or shelved an item without successfully checking it back in more than a few times over several years, I would probably stop using that library. Considering all the problems you mentioned in the OP, I'd likely stop using that library too.

 

Could you get the email address of the person responsible for processing ILLs or the library director? If not, you could mail a letter. That might be less stressful than dealing with staff in person or on the phone, and then you could make sure to include all the relevant details as well as how you want the matter to be resolved. When I've had customer service issues or billing errors before, sending a business letter has been the most effective way to resolve problems.

[mom2scouts]

My husband would like to ban me from using the library.  I never manage to get all the books back on time because with some returned, renewals, and new books checked out, I can't keep track of due dates.  He says it's cheaper to just buy them.  :blushing:

[Hunter]

I'm going through a similar library issue atm too. We were on vacation and I returned most of our books (all that ones that would come due) before leaving. I came home to find huge overdue charges, two books that I'm almost 100% positive that I returned apparently missing, both from ILL program, and recieved little help from the staff. They made one phone call to the other lilbrary, said I must not have returned them, and then just renewed the books for another week. So I have two days to come up with the missing books... that I can't prove I turned in but I don't have at home either. Grrr. I tend to think of late fees that are my fault as library donations... but buying books altogether because of misplacement on their part or mine does drive me crazy! It will probably be quite a long time before we use the library again after I get this mess straightened out. I agree... too much stress.

 

Yup, it's this kind of surprise that is so unpleasant and unsettling. 

[sunnyday]

Library fees used to give me a good deal of anxiety too. *Especially* if they were undeserved or mistaken. Any time I had a late fee, even just 10-20 cents, I would slink in and pay and then not darken the doorstep for a few months to detox. ;)

 

This thread makes me love my current local library SO much though. I don't like to buy fiction except for classics, and I like to pre-read nonfiction before committing to purchase it. Using the library is integral to how I use books. Fortunately:

 

* We have a cute, welcoming space with a neat kids' area.

* Great librarians who have been buying new books steadily and thoughtfully since our new building opened 4 years ago, and who keep seasonal and topical displays fresh and well-stocked.

*** NO LATE FEES.***

* If you lose a book and have to pay for it, you have a year to find it and get your money completely refunded.

* It's about a 10 minute walk from my house, and within spittin' distance of the weekly farmer's market, the post office, and my DD's preschool.

* We can have up to 100 books per card, 3 week check-out period, up to 5 renewals (unless someone has the book on hold).

* Our branch is part of a two-county system with 21 branches, some in pretty affluent areas, and "over 1.4 million books, eBooks, DVDs, and CDs". So with the online catalog and hold requests I can get almost anything I think of.

* On the rare chance it isn't in the system, we're adjacent to a massive metropolitan system and can get ILL without going across the country. 

 

I think I need to write them a letter!