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is this gift ok?


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Last night I started to panic. It TOTALLY didn't occur to me to get ds's gf a gift! I know she's very picky and doesn't like a lot of things, so shopping for her will be hard. I was going to buy her earrings online but obviously it's too late for that. She has very specific taste. I can not be running around now trying to find a gift for her! The malls are 30 - 45 minutes away. I just can't do that.

 

I was thinking about getting "them" a gift certificate to a local restaurant. It's not a nice restaurant, but it has AWESOME food and many vegetarian selections. She's a vegetarian who just started to add some chicken to her diet at her doctor's request. (and we have several vegetarian apps/dishes for Christmas) Does that sound good/acceptable? We've only gotten ds a coat for Christmas as we just had to pay his deductible for an accident, and we're also giving him money. That's what he needs. So he won't have a lot to open while she silently sits by. Last year I got them a gift bag full of movies and books of their interest, and I don't think neither of them appreciated them. I'm not going to try to buy stuff like that again.

 

Would a gift cert. for a restaurant (presumably for both of them) from il's or a your boyfriends' parents offend/bother you? It's not a personal gift........ I just don't see her enough to know her enough to know her taste.

 

If you don't think it's a good idea, do you have another? I will be heading out in the morning tomorrow to get it.

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Denise, Bless you heart. It's fine. Now, venture forth into the crowds! :lol:

 

:iagree: Yes yes yes, it's a great gift.

 

Someone mentioned putting the card into a container of candies or whatnot. As the stepmom of a vegetarian dsd, might I suggest that if you do that, vegetarian marshmallows are a fun treat for veggies. I think you can find them at Whole Foods and/or Trader Joes. But make sure you let her know they're vegan/veggie! :D

 

I, myself, will be making my first attempt at homemade vegan marshmallows today.

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Ok, so it sounds like this will be a great idea. I can also give a jar of candy/treats as she LOVES sweets.

 

Let me ask your opinions on this. And this is exactly why I can't shop locally for her. I told dd last MONTH we needed to buy her earrings online, then I totally forgot about it. Her taste is VERY unique and different. I think she would absolutely LOVE these. (we can all keep our opinions on this style of earrings to ourself, me included, ok?) ;)

 

http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=gothic+earrings&view=detail&id=CFAFDF88EC7772A4F7FF258D321ACD3D831B8E94&first=0&qpvt=gothic+earrings&FORM=IDFRIR

 

Ok, so do I go with the gift certificate, or order these earrings and show her them on my computer screen (price taped over) and apologize for their not getting here on time? Or is that tacky? The idea, not the earrings.:tongue_smilie: Even dd's think she'd love those earrings. They're not something I can just go out to a store to buy.

 

So.......... gift cert the day of Christmas or earrings delayed, something I really think she'd love? (and they can be exchanged or refunded)

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I'd go with the gift certificate in the jar of candy and save the earrings for her birthday. A nice dinner with her boyfriend at a restaurant that has vegetarian dishes sounds like a great gift to me. I would have loved to get something like that from my bf's mom!

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Yes, that sounds like a nice gift, and I like the idea of presenting it in a creative way (unless that would cause you more stress or extra shopping). I don't view gift cards as impersonal as long as some thought has gone into matching them to the recipient's interests, which would definitely be the case here. I wish more people would give them to me, in fact! :001_smile:

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It's not a nice restaurant, but it has AWESOME food and many vegetarian selections.

 

That is my definition of "a nice restaurant"!

 

I think it's a thoughtful gift they will both enjoy. Perhaps you can wrap up a copy of the menu for her? Either from the restaurant or printed from online?

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I think that would be just fine. This year I have had fun putting gift cards into fun jars filled with things like

M&M's, or candy kisses. Would she/they like somehting like that?? Makes the presentation more fun.

 

 

I love this idea. I am giving both of my sisters gift cards because I just coudn't think of anything else. Now I just have to figure out what to fill a jar with for th one who is diabetic.

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I did knit her a scarf and they yarn was expensive, but I am afraid to her this will seem like almost a non-gift. But I got "them" a gift certificate to a restaurant as well, and I hope they will like that. I think it sort of says "I honor you and your relationship and want the two of you to do something fun together."

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ok..... everyone likes the gift cert idea. Maybe I'll order the earrings next year?

 

Nah. I'd NEVER remember.:tongue_smilie:

 

If you really won't remember, and think the gf will love them, order them, print out a picture of them, and wrap the picture in a box. Explain that you saw those and thought she'd like them, and just had to order them for her, even though they wouldn't get here in time. ;)

 

The earrings are more personal than the gift certificate, and IMO, gifts should be as personal as we can manage.

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If you really won't remember, and think the gf will love them, order them, print out a picture of them, and wrap the picture in a box. Explain that you saw those and thought she'd like them, and just had to order them for her, even though they wouldn't get here in time. ;)

 

The earrings are more personal than the gift certificate, and IMO, gifts should be as personal as we can manage.

 

 

:iagree:, and this is a lovely, thoughtful way to give the earrings that won't be here on time. While the restaurant certificate is nice, it's not personal enough.

 

Denise, I'm curious. Is this the same gf you posted about, oh, almost two years ago who initially seemed so standoffish? If so, has she seemed to warm up, or has your perception of her changed? I remember specifically because she reminded me much of my own dd . . .

 

Blessings to you and your family this Christmas!!!

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If you really won't remember, and think the gf will love them, order them, print out a picture of them, and wrap the picture in a box. Explain that you saw those and thought she'd like them, and just had to order them for her, even though they wouldn't get here in time. ;)

 

The earrings are more personal than the gift certificate, and IMO, gifts should be as personal as we can manage.

 

Earrings are more personal, but I know that the delayed delivery would make me feel as if I had been forgotten if I were in the GF's shoes. Weird but true.

 

I would give her the gift card ... And buy the earrings now so that I'd be prepared for the next event.

 

PS: you are a FANTASTIC mom for buying any gift for his girlfriend.

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:iagree:, and this is a lovely, thoughtful way to give the earrings that won't be here on time. While the restaurant certificate is nice, it's not personal enough.

 

Denise, I'm curious. Is this the same gf you posted about, oh, almost two years ago who initially seemed so standoffish? If so, has she seemed to warm up, or has your perception of her changed? I remember specifically because she reminded me much of my own dd . . .

 

Blessings to you and your family this Christmas!!!

 

yes, same girl. She still doesn't come around much, but she does seem to open up a little more when she's here. At least it's no longer uncomfortable. Ds comes by often without her and is always more talkative. She works on weekends and he oftentimes will stop in to see us before heading back to college. Her family is still the major priority and where they spend most of their time. :sad: I'm accepting it better. I know she has HUGE anxiety issues and I know she's always more comfortable in her own home. She even left college to stay home and go to a local one. Poor kid.

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you all have given me something to think about. Dh feels strongly that the earrings are more personal, that they're just for her, and to go with them. I told him the Hive felt differently.:tongue_smilie: I also thought about them not getting here on time.

 

I'm still so undecided. If she doesn't like the earring, I know I can get a refund. I do know they'll like the restaurant.

 

Siiiiigh. I'll ponder a little more while baking cookies. I called the store and the package won't ship until tomorrow anyway.

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I don't think every gift card is impersonal. If one is talking about an email from Amazon saying "You've been gifted an Amazon gift card!"- yeah that's impersonal (although I'd love it :lol:). But a gift card to a restaurant that comfortably accommodates HER is not impersonal at all, IMO.

 

I'd get the gift card so she has something tangible to open and go ahead and buy the earrings now and save them for her birthday.

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you all have given me something to think about. Dh feels strongly that the earrings are more personal, that they're just for her, and to go with them. I told him the Hive felt differently.:tongue_smilie: .

 

Yes and we're girls so our opinion counts more!

 

If you were asking a month ago, yeah, the earrings might have been a better choice, but since they'd be late, and she could be hurt by that, I would go with the gift certificate and make the presentation really nice.

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I think the earrings are really cool and thoughtful, so a wrapped picture of them would make me very happy. I can see, however, that some people might feel that their gift was an unimportant afterthought in this case. You have put a lot of thought into the perfect gift card for her, also, and I doubt that would go unappreciated.

 

Can you afford both? That is what I would do.

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I honestly don't get how a print-out of a photo of promised earrings is any more personal than a gift card. A gift card to a restaurant is essentially a "photo" of a promised meal. Why are things seen as more personal than experiences? I suppose that would be a better question for a spin-off thread.

Edited by WordGirl
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Yes and we're girls so our opinion counts more!

 

 

 

 

well...... duh! Obviously!!! But I'm not going to tell HIM that until I get MY gift.

 

:lol::lol::lol::lol: (KIDDING!)

 

Since I'm SO undecided, I'm thinking of shorting the money we were going to give ds by $50, (remember, we're paying for his insurance deductible, which is more than we'd spend on Christmas for him anyway! but he definitely can't do it) give the gift card to the restaurant AND some movie tickets to her to open, but it would be addressed to both of them, only because I'd still be getting her the earring. Then I'd also give her a wrapped jewelry box and tell her how sorry I am that her earring didn't arrive on time. I can ask her then if she likes it, because if she'd rather have something different, she can look at the earrings online and pick out another, just for her, and I could just exchange it when they came in. I know she will be honest as she has been about our cooking, good AND bad. WHICH I LIKE!!! I LOVE honesty!!! That way I'll cover all our bases.

 

Although ds is getting the coat, he's wanting money so we'll be giving him that. Besides, he's in college so next time he runs short, more money. Ya know. So maybe that will solve all problems. Something for him, something for her, even though it's late, something for both of them, and the money I give him will be spent on her anyway. ;) So .........

 

Yeah...... I've made my mind up. I'm going to do it all.

 

Thanks everyone! Your input is what made me decide on this. In the end the amount spent will be the same, and I'm sure that part will make dh happy. I think I've pleased everyone here.:D

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Yeah...... I've made my mind up. I'm going to do it all.

 

Thanks everyone! Your input is what made me decide on this. In the end the amount spent will be the same, and I'm sure that part will make dh happy. I think I've pleased everyone here.:D

 

You're a very thoughtful mom, Denise.:grouphug:

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I love this idea. I am giving both of my sisters gift cards because I just coudn't think of anything else. Now I just have to figure out what to fill a jar with for th one who is diabetic.

 

Does she do her nails? Maybe a bottle of nail polish, a small bottle of polish remover and a whole load of cotton balls to fill in all the spaces.

 

Or if you want something more colorful, sugar free gumballs?

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Dh feels strongly that the earrings are more personal, that they're just for her, and to go with them. I told him the Hive felt differently.:tongue_smilie:

 

I think the Hive is only saying that because you don't have the earrings! :lol::lol:

 

(Yes, yes, I'm being a bit silly, and I might be wrong, but you'll never really convince me. :D)

 

Bethany's idea was perfect, to wrap a picture of the earrings in a small earring box, so it's almost like having the real thing. That does make it seem more "real" than printing out an 8x11 web page and folding it into an envelope--what I'd probably do in desperation if I didn't think to ask for advice.

 

With the gift certificate, it really is another gift for your son to enjoy also and would be better if it had both of their names on it.

 

(((Denise))), I'm sorry you don't have the warm relationship with her that I know you'd like to enjoy. :grouphug:

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I think the earrings are really cool and thoughtful, so a wrapped picture of them would make me very happy. I can see, however, that some people might feel that their gift was an unimportant afterthought in this case. You have put a lot of thought into the perfect gift card for her, also, and I doubt that would go unappreciated.

 

Can you afford both? That is what I would do.

 

:iagree:

 

I also really like to get gift cards because it's something we wouldn't otherwise do. My MIL used to do that all the time and it would take us all year to use them all.

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