I was leading a charmed homeschool life, until..."quizzing!"

[Catherine]

In 6 years of homeschooling three children, this had not happened to me once. I was starting to think I had managed to surround myself with supportive people. Nope.

 

Yesterday a neighbor, a friend, someone I know well and have known for many years, came by to pick up his son and out of the blue, looked at our wall map and started quizzing my fifth grader about geography! AND-he wasn't satisfied that he got immediate, correct answers to every question-he tried to cover the map and then asked my 10 yo ds to name all the provinces of Canada!

 

My husband with the graduate degree quipped this morning that HE can't begin to name the provinces of Canada. Anyway, I guess ds "failed"-he only named one! LOL! I'm sure neighbor\friend will interpret this as supporting his decision to send his kids to school. And, I'm sure his kids can all rattle off the Canadian provinces at the drop of a hat. :tongue_smilie:

[beccad777]

Unbelievable! That is ridiculous! :confused:

[kiana]

Next time he brings his kids over, quiz them until you find areas of weakness, and suggest homeschooling materials for afterschool remediation.

 

(Well, not really. But it would be funny).

[Nicole M]

Now that I'm old, i probably would have said something like, "Excuse me, but perhaps you don't realize you're being a jerk? I mean, it's not your job to quiz my children, and we owe you nothing in the way of proof. Go away."

 

Okay. I would not have said go away, but I would have wanted to.

 

Do I remember that someone here shared that she has a standard response? Something like, "I do not allow people to quiz my child."

 

I have a new friend, Canadian, and we were discussing this very thing a few weeks ago. I had to get out the globe, because I just don't have a mental picture of Canada. We were both laughing about how little I knew, and he quipped, "Good grief woman! Are you qualified to teach these children?" :D

[Nicole M]

I would have looked at his child and said, "Ok, now it's your turn."

 

Nice!

[KungFuPanda]

Americans are notoriously bad at geography. MOST 10-year-olds don't know the Canadian Provinces. The few I know who CAN identify them are homeschooled.

[SailorMom]

I get so tired of that.

I've made the mistake of explaining the curriculum we're using and what they are learining in September.... the begining of the school year, right? Well - said people will begin to quiz my kids on the topic as if they should already know all of it!

I've also had people whose children I know very well quiz my kids on things that I know their kids don't know!

I jjst laugh now, but for the first few years I homeschooled it really bothered me.

[Beauty From Ashes]

I had a woman do this to my kids. I looked at her and said, "do I get to quiz you on things I think you should know when you are done". She smiled, laughed, and stopped. I don't know if she was offended, but I know I was. Does she quiz public schoolers when they come in? Nope, I know she doesn't because I have been in there when public school kids are present.

 

I hate that. I just hate it. It's like they are trying to prove we are messing up our kids.

[arghmatey]

How about I graduated at the top of my ps high school class and didn't even know Canada had provinces. As in, I did not recall ever having heard the word "province". Woohoo for all AP classes!!! Lol

[Mommyfaithe]

Now that I'm old, i probably would have said something like, "Excuse me, but perhaps you don't realize you're being a jerk? I mean, it's not your job to quiz my children, and we owe you nothing in the way of proof. Go away."

 

Okay. I would not have said go away, but I would have wanted to.

 

Do I remember that someone here shared that she has a standard response? Something like, "I do not allow people to quiz my child."

 

I have a new friend, Canadian, and we were discussing this very thing a few weeks ago. I had to get out the globe, because I just don't have a mental picture of Canada. We were both laughing about how little I knew, and he quipped, "Good grief woman! Are you qualified to teach these children?" :D

:iagree::iagree:

 

He woud have been called a jerk. And I would have asked him to name the us states and their capitals...in order of admittance....then made fun of his blank stare and terrible education. :glare:

 

My pediatrician did this to ds once...asked him to figure out his pool yardage into miles. My son looked at him and asked him what that had to do with his growth chart or immunizations:chillpill: :lol::lol:

 

Doctor hurumphed and went back to his regular check up....:lol:

Faithe.....who has no patience for knuckeheads these days.

[Tawlas]

I gotta admit, I was surprised your 10yo couldn't remember more than one province . . . but then I remembered you're American lol. I'm Canadian and I'm sure I would come have come up with only about 10% of American states at that age :D. I used to know them all - but we certainly weren't taught that in school. I was a geography geek and I learned them on my own. :tongue_smilie:

As far as quizzing goes, glad that my son "seems" ahead of the curve right now by learning to read early. Last thing he needs is someone giving him grief. How rude!

[coralloyd]

We went to a BBQ at a friends house. My dd7 was 5 at the time and was sitting on the floor trying to do a puzzle. A lady that is a teacher at the local middle school sat down next to her, and began talking to her. Now I barely know this lady, so I was watching closely. She picked up the puzzle box and asked dd if she could sound out the words on the box. Dd looked at her and said "United States of America Floor Puzzle." The look on the ladies face was priceless lol! She awkwardly got up and made her way over to me. She said "I guess you'er doing a good job." I looked at her smiled and walked away. Man I really wanted to let her have it! Oh, the many things I could have said. Looking back I wish I had.

 

The thing that gets me is that she expected a 5 yr. old to be able to sound that out! My dd is the exception to the rule. The nerve of some people!

[veggiegal]

I too am Canadian, and had to process your comments for a minute. My kids know their country. :D

 

But the principle of quizzing drives me crazy! My approach--admittedly the very few times it has happened to us--is to have my kids pick some esoteric topic they are interested in and know a ton about from their self-directed learning (say, dinosaurs) and start quizzing the adult back. Turn about is fair play. It's even more fun when the topic is one your child has just done in depth, that everyone does in school, but most of us learned via the "memorize for the test and promptly forget it" method. One of my friends has an 8-year-old that asks some tough questions about the periodic table...:tongue_smilie:

[HSMom2One]

That would bother me too. What a dig! It's hard to know where he was coming from, but it could have been because....

 

 

 

• Your neighbor maybe has learned about the latest Nation's Report Card which states that last year's 4th graders showed rising scores in their knowledge of geography, higher than has ever been assessed, making him feel justified in his choice to send his dc to ps. (Here is a link to that info.)
  
• Or it could be that hs'ing has been discussed in his family and he wanted to gather some ammunition.
  
• Or maybe he was just really proud of the fact that his kids know about Canadian geography and wanted to show off......who knows.
  

 

 

Whatever the case, try to let it go. Don't let it sway you from your brave and courageous decision to home educate your dc. I think if this had happened to me, I would be tempted to have a printed off copy of HSLDA's 2009 Progress Report handy to give him next time he comes over. ;)

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

Edited September 11, 2011 by HSMom2One

[Denisemomof4]

if someone were quizzing my kid, I'd stop them and say, "I take care of that." I'd tell my kids that once they hear me say that, they are to stop answering questions.

[HSMom2One]

But the principle of quizzing drives me crazy! My approach--admittedly the very few times it has happened to us--is to have my kids pick some esoteric topic they are interested in and know a ton about from their self-directed learning (say, dinosaurs) and start quizzing the adult back. Turn about is fair play. It's even more fun when the topic is one your child has just done in depth, that everyone does in school, but most of us learned via the "memorize for the test and promptly forget it" method. One of my friends has an 8-year-old that asks some tough questions about the periodic table...:tongue_smilie:

 

:iagree: :iagree:That very well could have been my own response too.

 

Lucinda

[Belacqua]

We went to a BBQ at a friends house. My dd7 was 5 at the time and was sitting on the floor trying to do a puzzle. A lady that is a teacher at the local middle school sat down next to her, and began talking to her. Now I barely know this lady, so I was watching closely. She picked up the puzzle box and asked dd if she could sound out the words on the box. Dd looked at her and said "United States of America Floor Puzzle." The look on the ladies face was priceless lol! She awkwardly got up and made her way over to me. She said "I guess you'er doing a good job." I looked at her smiled and walked away. Man I really wanted to let her have it! Oh, the many things I could have said. Looking back I wish I had.

 

The thing that gets me is that she expected a 5 yr. old to be able to sound that out! My dd is the exception to the rule. The nerve of some people!

 

Grrrr.

 

I find myself wishing your daughter had said, "United States of America Floor Puzzle. And this next part says, You intrusive jerk. Oh, wait, I made a mistake. It says 250 pieces."

 

But that would be wrong. :)

[stripe]

I wonder how many people outside of Canada know them.

 

If you watch enough "Jaywalking," or read enough studies, many Americans don't seem to know how many states there are or where to find the US on a map.

 

Maybe a quiz of Central America would be fun for a rematch? Or parts of the former Soviet Union?

[Garga]

I too am Canadian, and had to process your comments for a minute. My kids know their country. :D

 

But the principle of quizzing drives me crazy! My approach--admittedly the very few times it has happened to us--is to have my kids pick some esoteric topic they are interested in and know a ton about from their self-directed learning (say, dinosaurs) and start quizzing the adult back. Turn about is fair play. It's even more fun when the topic is one your child has just done in depth, that everyone does in school, but most of us learned via the "memorize for the test and promptly forget it" method. One of my friends has an 8-year-old that asks some tough questions about the periodic table...:tongue_smilie:

 

 

Ooo! I need to start teaching my kids some esoteric topics so we're ready if someone starts the questioning! Maybe about the Crimean War.

[kiana]

Ooo! I need to start teaching my kids some esoteric topics so we're ready if someone starts the questioning! Maybe about the Crimean War.

 

They don't even have to be that esoteric. :P

[Mothersweets]

Grrrr.

 

I find myself wishing your daughter had said, "United States of America Floor Puzzle. And this next part says, You intrusive jerk. Oh, wait, I made a mistake. It says 250 pieces."

 

But that would be wrong. :)

 

I don't care if it's wrong - I like it!!

[coralloyd]

Grrrr.

 

I find myself wishing your daughter had said, "United States of America Floor Puzzle. And this next part says, You intrusive jerk. Oh, wait, I made a mistake. It says 250 pieces."

 

But that would be wrong. :)

 

Awesome!

[Penelope]

I try to find a nice way to stop people like that.

 

It may be more common for homeschooled kids to get quizzed, but I think all kids do get this from time to time. It's usually much older people, I've noticed. Different generations view children differently.

[kiana]

I try to find a nice way to stop people like that.

 

It may be more common for homeschooled kids to get quizzed, but I think all kids do get this from time to time. It's usually much older people, I've noticed. Different generations view children differently.

 

Yes. My mother (born in '49) says that when she was a child it was very common for older adults to quiz them. (Of course, then they'd give them a penny or a nickel for getting the answer) :P

[Bang!Zoom!]

Yes. My mother (born in '49) says that when she was a child it was very common for older adults to quiz them. (Of course, then they'd give them a penny or a nickel for getting the answer) :P

 

This was very common growing up.

 

I remember my Grandma gave me a JFK piece once for a correct answer about raspberries. I was probably four at the time.

[Belacqua]

Yes. My mother (born in '49) says that when she was a child it was very common for older adults to quiz them. (Of course, then they'd give them a penny or a nickel for getting the answer) :P

 

Hmmm...you may be onto something!

 

Our local homeschool PE teacher used to tease kids who asked for reasonable things (the ball, to go to the restroom, etc.) with, "Sure. Fifty bucks." And he'd hold out his hand for the few seconds it took the kid to realize he was joking.

 

Maybe our kids can say, "Sure. State capitals are a quarter each. Two-digit multiplication runs a dollar."

[Bang!Zoom!]

Kiana, thanks for mentioning it, it brought back a flood of really fun memories for me. I'd totally forgotten about it, I think the tradition needs revival.

 

There was this guy, went by the nickname of "Whitey"..lived in a one room log cabin next to ours on a lake in Northern Michigan. Whitey had a super round belly and tiny feet. He was a marvel just to watch him walk. His wife, Jean, was a carbon copy of Alice from the Honeymooners.

 

Every year when we'd go up to open up the cabin, one of the first things the kids would do is rush over to Whitey and Jeans to see if they were "up" for the season yet.

 

We'd gather around him and let him quiz us on our year at school for dimes and pennies.

 

Good times. Great memories.

[GoVanGogh]

DH is a software engineer for a small company. He had to work yesterday, so took DS in to the office with him. DH was telling me last night that one of his co-workers (an older gentleman, former high school math teacher) was asking our 9-year-old son if he knew calculus. :001_huh: Then he sat down with DS and spent an hour talking with him and showing him how to do advanced math. Thankfully DS is very interested in things like that, even if he is still counting on his fingers and toes. :tongue_smilie: Still. I was a little embarrassed and put off at the thought of my husband's co-worker 'teaching' DS.

[gardenmom5]

I'm sure neighbor\friend will interpret this as supporting his decision to send his kids to school. And, I'm sure his kids can all rattle off the Canadian provinces at the drop of a hat. :tongue_smilie:

 

neighbor sounds insecure in decision to send own children to public school.

 

Have a list of questions (you know those - are you smarter than a homeschooler/5th grader. there are some college educated adults can't answer.) handy so when other rude people start quizzing your children, you can start quizzing them.

[chepyl]

I quiz my kids in front of my dad so he won't quiz them about things they don't know yet. He is not so sure about this homeschooling thing ;). It helps when my son can spout off facts about the Fertile Crescent, Egypt, and King Narmer....thank you SOTW!

 

I plan to have him recite his CC history timeline at Christmas. He likes to show off some.

 

But, if a stranger started quizzing my kids, I would be angry. (unless they happened to ask my 5 year old what he knows about Ancient Egypt :tongue_smilie:).

[RegGuheert]

I don't recall any obnoxious quiz-the-homeschooler incidents, but DS13 has been to the National Spelling Bee twice and he gets quizzed all.the.time! Whenever someone local recognizes him they feel compelled to ask him to spell the hardest word they can think of. However, he gave up spelling for others about six months ago! :001_smile: Seriously, he will not even spell for me anymore! :glare:

 

We were at a party on Friday evening when a friend who was out of the country during the National Bee congratulated my son and then asked him to spell something. My son did not respond and our friend commented that he has stumped him, to which my son said, "No, I know how to spell that." I assured my friend that DS13 could spell virtually any English word that he or I could come up with. It was only words that we have never heard of that he might get tripped up on! :tongue_smilie:

 

(Yes, I know my son's response was slightly rude, but he wasn't at all snotty about it. I just think he has had his fill of quizzing for one lifetime.)

[silliness7]

I would have looked at his child and said, "Ok, now it's your turn."

 

EXACTLY!!

The nerve! :tongue_smilie:

[silliness7]

We were both laughing about how little I knew, and he quipped, "Good grief woman! Are you qualified to teach these children?" :D

 

If I say something ditzy my dh will quip something like, "and she's homeschooling our children." I don't find it very funny. :glare: Homeschooling moms and homeschooled children are not super genius's. We're normal people, not know-it-alls. Sheesh!

[silliness7]

Hmmm...you may be onto something!

 

Our local homeschool PE teacher used to tease kids who asked for reasonable things (the ball, to go to the restroom, etc.) with, "Sure. Fifty bucks." And he'd hold out his hand for the few seconds it took the kid to realize he was joking.

 

Maybe our kids can say, "Sure. State capitals are a quarter each. Two-digit multiplication runs a dollar."

 

That is so perfect. I want someone to quiz my kids now so they can say this. :D

[LAS in LA]

I agree with everyone who mentioned the generation difference, and would also add that some people quiz children because they want to be amazed by them. Still might not be appropriate, but it's not necessarily an anti-homeschooling thing to do.

[Beauty From Ashes]

If I say something ditzy my dh will quip something like, "and she's homeschooling our children." I don't find it very funny. :glare: Homeschooling moms and homeschooled children are not super genius's. We're normal people, not know-it-alls. Sheesh!

 

Just like public school kids and teachers. :tongue_smilie:

[Mommy22alyns]

Homeschooling moms and homeschooled children are not super genius's. We're normal people, not know-it-alls. Sheesh!

 

 

Exactly! I get very tense if it looks like the girls are going to be quizzed. They're not trained animals, they're KIDS.

[Belacqua]

I don't recall any obnoxious quiz-the-homeschooler incidents, but DS13 has been to the National Spelling Bee twice and he gets quizzed all.the.time! Whenever someone local recognizes him they feel compelled to ask him to spell the hardest word they can think of. However, he gave up spelling for others about six months ago! :001_smile: Seriously, he will not even spell for me anymore! :glare:

 

We were at a party on Friday evening when a friend who was out of the country during the National Bee congratulated my son and then asked him to spell something. My son did not respond and our friend commented that he has stumped him, to which my son said, "No, I know how to spell that." I assured my friend that DS13 could spell virtually any English word that he or I could come up with. It was only words that we have never heard of that he might get tripped up on! :tongue_smilie:

 

(Yes, I know my son's response was slightly rude, but he wasn't at all snotty about it. I just think he has had his fill of quizzing for one lifetime.)

 

I don't blame your son for being sick of it. How obnoxious.

 

Apparently, poor Evan (that homeschooled boy who won, what, five years ago?) is in college and still has people firing spelling words at him.

[Green Vixen]

Hi Catherine,

 

I am sorry your child was quizzed. I was homeschooled when I was young and homeschooling was more uncommon so there was a lot of mystery surrounding it. I was quizzed all the time and honestly it was not good for my self esteem :-( I remember one of my ballet classmates would quiz me all the time in the changing room. She was and still is extremely intelligent (MIT undergrad, Harvard Med School) so as you can imagine her questions were very advanced!

 

I would really try to stop the quizzing in its tracks and tell your children how they should respond to such bullying.

 

Marisa

[Dina in Oklahoma]

DD often gets quizzed and has handled it with grace so far. Last week however was extremely disheartening when DD's pediatrican started quizzing her over her favorite subjects, if she liked being homeschooled,and if she was still going to a "blended-model" (2 days at school 3 at home) when she KNEW we weren't.

 

She directed the entire conversation toward DD and completely ignored me until I had had enough and I stated that we were VERY happy with our co-op where DD had made MANY dear friends was active in several activities and would be taking voice lessons as well. She acted as though DD was locked away in a cage and was never allowed around other children.

 

DD picked up on her tone and commented as we were walking out "Dr. X wasn't very friendly and she just ignored you Mama!" She unfortunately was correct.

[littleWMN]

I recently ran into a former coworker of my husband. She met my ten year old and asked where she went to school (her own daughter is in private school). She then asked - not a joke - "Is your mom smart enough to teach you ?". My daughter giggled and answered yes. I shot back, "I think I can handle first grade." (My younger dd is in first, I'm not sure why I didn't say fifth, lol). She said, "I don't know... my daughter was in second grade last year and brought home some phonics homework that stumped me!" I just said, "oh really?". I was shocked she would ask my daughter that, and it did not come across as a joke.

[ThatCyndiGirl]

Well, OBVIOIUSLY if your child cannot name all the Canadian provinces then he is the unfortunate victim of educational neglect.

 

I'm picturing the look on the face of the child welfare worker who has to take THAT call: :001_huh:

[Cosmos]

DH is a software engineer for a small company. He had to work yesterday, so took DS in to the office with him. DH was telling me last night that one of his co-workers (an older gentleman, former high school math teacher) was asking our 9-year-old son if he knew calculus. :001_huh: Then he sat down with DS and spent an hour talking with him and showing him how to do advanced math. Thankfully DS is very interested in things like that, even if he is still counting on his fingers and toes. :tongue_smilie: Still. I was a little embarrassed and put off at the thought of my husband's co-worker 'teaching' DS.

 

Sounds like a great experience for your ds. A kind mentor taking the time to share his knowledge is a precious resource. I don't understand being "put off" by something like this. :confused: I'm fervently hoping that my ds will find mentors in his areas of interest as he gets older.

 

As for quizzing, I don't know. I'm familiar with the older generation type of quizzing mentioned here, and it's always seemed kindly and friendly to me. A way for an older person to make conversation with a younger one. And it often gives them a chance to share their life experiences. My ds has had many conversations that start with something like, "Do you know where Mumbai is?" and end with a wonderful story from another part of the world.

 

We've never had the kind of quizzing that some people mention, in which it seems like they are questioning the quality of our homeschooling. That would definitely bother me, if I noticed it happening.

[Rosie_0801]

DH is a software engineer for a small company. He had to work yesterday, so took DS in to the office with him. DH was telling me last night that one of his co-workers (an older gentleman, former high school math teacher) was asking our 9-year-old son if he knew calculus. :001_huh: Then he sat down with DS and spent an hour talking with him and showing him how to do advanced math. Thankfully DS is very interested in things like that, even if he is still counting on his fingers and toes. :tongue_smilie: Still. I was a little embarrassed and put off at the thought of my husband's co-worker 'teaching' DS.

 

I can understand your embarrassment, but I think it is a nice, positive story :) Too often men treat boys as though they don't like them, and too often, kids don't like their grandpas. In my experience, old guys quizzing children want to convince themselves that the child is smart enough (meaning polite enough) to listen to them telling stories from when they were in the navy, forty years ago.

 

Rosie

[Sahamamama]

Obviously, ;) you need this CD. There's a song on it for Canada --

 

Nova Scotia

Manitoba

Ontario

Prince Edward Island

New Brunswick

Newfoundland

Alberta

British Columbia

Yukon Territory

Nunavut

Saskatchewan

Northwest Territories

Quebec

 

These are the provinces and territories of Canada.... :lol: I would love to be a fly on the wall when your neighbor's kids are being quizzed by you.

 

How could you resist the temptation? :lol:

[arghmatey]

How about if the child replies, "I charge $100.00 an hour for tutoring!" That would make me smile.

[Sahamamama]

My pediatrician did this to ds once...asked him to figure out his pool yardage into miles. My son looked at him and asked him what that had to do with his growth chart or immunizations:chillpill: :lol::lol:

 

Doctor hurumphed and went back to his regular check up....:lol:

Faithe.....who has no patience for knuckeheads these days.

 

Faithe, this is so funny! I love it.

 

When our oldest daughter was three years old, we took her to the pediatrician for her physical. It just so happened that prior to this visit, my husband (who works in the medical field) had been talking to her about the scientific names for bones. ;)

 

Doctor: Is she in preschool?

 

Us: No, she is not.

 

Doctor: When do you plan to put her in?

 

Us: We don't, we are homeschooling her now and plan to continue.

 

Doctor (frowns, then begins quizzing the toddler :glare:): Where is your knee?

 

Her (showing him): I have two knees!

 

Doctor: Where is your nose?

 

Her (showing him): Here.

 

Doctor: Where is your elbow?

 

Her (showing him): I have two elbows.

 

Doctor: Ah, but where is your collar bone?

 

Her (pointing to her collar bone): It's also called a clavicle. :001_huh:

 

Doctor (trying to hide his surprise, clears his throat, looks at weight chart): Well, she seems to be well-proportioned regarding weight and height for her age... Now...

 

We still laugh about that one. :lol:

[Sahamamama]

Hi Catherine,

 

I am sorry your child was quizzed. I was homeschooled when I was young and homeschooling was more uncommon so there was a lot of mystery surrounding it. I was quizzed all the time and honestly it was not good for my self esteem :-( I remember one of my ballet classmates would quiz me all the time in the changing room. She was and still is extremely intelligent (MIT undergrad, Harvard Med School) so as you can imagine her questions were very advanced!

 

I would really try to stop the quizzing in its tracks and tell your children how they should respond to such bullying.

 

Marisa

 

Thank you for sharing this, Marisa.

[Forget-Me-Not]

They don't even have to be that esoteric. :P

 

I knew Canada had provinces, but I had to look up the definition of esoteric :lol:

 

 

Doctor (trying to hide his surprise, clears his throat, looks at weight chart): Well, she seems to be well-proportioned regarding weight and height for her age... Now...

 

We still laugh about that one. :lol:

 

:lol::lol: My kids went to the dentist last week, and the dentist was asking them what grade they're in, etc. He asked my 6 yo if she was in Kindergarten and she said, "Well, I'm doing both Kindergarten and 1st grade work. Actually, I'm homeschooled." He grinned and said, "ACTUALLY I think you have a very good vocabulary."

[iamrachelle]

Next time he brings his kids over, quiz them until you find areas of weakness, and suggest homeschooling materials for afterschool remediation.

 

(Well, not really. But it would be funny).

 

:iagree: