Viking funeral spinoff: Homeschooling warning list!

[dangermom]

In an earlier thread, Elaine wrote:

Do not have a viking funeral, complete with flamage, in your bathtub unless you move the shower curtain.

K&Rs Mom then added:

Do not put cuneiform tablets in the oven if you have used air-dry clay (not only do they melt, they stink).

 

Now we need to add to the list. Please add your dire warnings about the dangers of homeschooling, learned through hard experience!

[mcconnellboys]

If you must make a chicken mummy, be very careful not to forget about it, *especially* during the early stages, even if it is in the garage......

 

Regena

[mcconnellboys]

Explain at length to your children (boys especially) that even though you adore their vivid imaginations and understand that they need time to act out every battle scene or adventure they ever see in movie format, museum diorama, or re-enactment - IMMEDIATELY - others may not understand or appreciate being trampled, pummeled, or stabbed as they go about their daily business, so a little descretion is called for.....

 

Regena

[dalynnrmc]

Explain to your R&S English-using children that just because they know good grammar, doesn't mean that everyone in America uses grammar properly. Furthermore, just because other people do not use grammar the way the children know it should be used does not give an 8yo the right and responsibility to correct every adult they hear misusing our language. In fact, it is considered rude. If the children absolutely *must* correct the improper grammar of others, they should begin carrying a notebook, writing down the improper grammar, and then recopying it with the proper usages. Keep silent. ;)

[Remudamom]

Explain at length to your children (boys especially) that even though you adore their vivid imaginations and understand that they need time to act out every battle scene or adventure they ever see in movie format, museum diorama, or re-enactment - IMMEDIATELY - others may not understand or appreciate being trampled, pummeled, or stabbed as they go about their daily business, so a little descretion is called for.....

 

Regena

 

 

And I'm going to add:

 

You may not re-enact above scenes using real horses and sword/javelin type weapons. (Braveheart and LOR jumps instantly to mind here.) And no medieval jousting either. I don't care what time period we are studying. Enough is enough.

[Alphabetika]

When making a model of the Trojan Horse, be sure to cut holes in the body of the horse BEFORE you glue it all together, so the soldiers don't suffocate.

[dragons in the flower bed]

Warn your husband if you're going to leave a model of the Nile made of brown dirt in a baking pan in the kitchen in the dark.

 

. . . :lol: . . . that poor man puts up with so much so we can homeschool. I never make brownies, but I often make brown things in foil baking pans.

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

If the children absolutely *must* correct the improper grammar of others, they should begin carrying a notebook, writing down the improper grammar, and then recopying it with the proper usages. Keep silent. ;)

 

Oh. My. Goodness that's PERFECT. I'm out of rep. But that's absolutely a keeper.

[OnTheBrink]

Alert older son that the orange jello with sliced olives, curly noodles, life savers and other odd ingredients is not dessert; it's a cell model and not for midnight snacking.

[Aubrey]

If you must make a chicken mummy, be very careful not to forget about it, *especially* during the early stages, even if it is in the garage......

 

Regena

 

I *knew* the first one would be about a chicken mummy!

[Lizzie in Ma]

Warn your husband if you're going to leave a model of the Nile made of brown dirt in a baking pan in the kitchen in the dark.

 

. . . :lol: . . . that poor man puts up with so much so we can homeschool. I never make brownies, but I often make brown things in foil baking pans.

 

Oh too, too funny.

[Jolash]

No, you may not dissect the mole/lizard/bird the cat dropped on the doorstep!

[elegantlion]

If I am going to read aloud Caddie Woodlawn you can play. However, the play must be time period appropriate. Machine gun fire and UZZi's were not around in the 1860's. This was followed by the comment, "And when are we getting to the Civil War?" BOYS!

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

If you let your children re-enact Romans against Celts, complete with body armour, blue paint, wooden shields and swords, make sure the door leading to the basement is closed before they start...

[ChristyB in TN]

Don't make fun of brick and mortar schools, you may decide to send your kids there and you have to eat your words. Just ask me how I know...

[GailV]

If you must make a chicken mummy, be very careful not to forget about it, *especially* during the early stages, even if it is in the garage......

 

Regena

Before you even start that chicken mummy think about what you will do with it when it is done -- that is, after you have spent weeks and weeks tending to it, then hours and hours wrapping it in linen strips, what exactly are you planning to do? Keep it in the basement? Bury it in the garden? Toss it in the trash like KFC leftovers?

 

This is the part the Activity Guide didn't explain, much to my chagrin. So far ours has been used to give the movers-and-packers something to think about.

[Janet in WA]

In an earlier thread, Elaine wrote:K&Rs Mom then added:

 

Now we need to add to the list. Please add your dire warnings about the dangers of homeschooling, learned through hard experience!

If you decide to dissect the real owl pellets from the real owls that live in the trees in your yard (and nevermind telling me that the owl pellets you buy are real and come from real owls -- I'm not impressed), be sure to sterilize the real owl pellets first.

[C_l_e_0..Q_c]

. It will defrost in April...

 

:smilielol5: :smilielol5: :smilielol5: :smilielol5:

[Mama Lynx]

Before you even start that chicken mummy think about what you will do with it when it is done -- that is, after you have spent weeks and weeks tending to it, then hours and hours wrapping it in linen strips, what exactly are you planning to do? Keep it in the basement? Bury it in the garden? Toss it in the trash like KFC leftovers?

 

This is the part the Activity Guide didn't explain, much to my chagrin. So far ours has been used to give the movers-and-packers something to think about.

 

No kidding. Ours was so much work and frankly, I was so proud of the danged thing that I can't bear to toss it. The kids want to make a sarcophagus for it and bury it in the back yard, under a pyramid ... but this is a rental house, and I can't imagine the landlord would be properly appreciative.

[K&Rs Mom]

No kidding. Ours was so much work and frankly, I was so proud of the danged thing that I can't bear to toss it. The kids want to make a sarcophagus for it and bury it in the back yard, under a pyramid ... but this is a rental house, and I can't imagine the landlord would be properly appreciative.

 

 

Could you bury it and plant a tree on top? Might be more marketable than a pyramid....

[GailV]

I've always sort of liked the idea of burying it and then moving away. Then I could fantasize that someone else dug it up and was trying to figure out why?

 

But I do think a pyramid would be a bit of overkill.

[Michelle in MO]

doing an indoor experiment with a piece of liver and hydrogen peroxide. Hydrogen peroxide is an enzyme that reacts with the liver, causing an almost violent bubbling over of frothy, pink-tinged bubbles!

 

Do it outside, instead! My girls loved this when they were younger, but the mess was pretty gross to clean up!

[Jenstet]

Homemade toothpaste is disgusting and will make the baby puke.

 

Yes, dad will be mad that you made a beaver dam in the drainage ditch. He just raked out all the leaves this past weekend and in the spring the ditch is there for a reason.

 

Zeus's golden apple (made from paper mache) will shatter if used as a baseball.

[dragons in the flower bed]

RE: Celts v. Romans, taking a bath in blue kool-aid is not more efficient, in the long run, than using lots of blue eyeshadow.

[GailV]

RE: Celts v. Romans, taking a bath in blue kool-aid is not more efficient, in the long run, than using lots of blue eyeshadow.

 

 

Between this and the liver-peroxide post, I'm learning the answers to questions I never thought to ask.

[OneRoomHomeSchool]

I've always sort of liked the idea of burying it and then moving away. Then I could fantasize that someone else dug it up and was trying to figure out why?

 

 

:lol:

[frogpond1]

wearing a giant soft-sculpture king's crown, and it probably is best to take off the Pope's Miter before getting the mail, even though last year 4 children running up the cul-de-sac in Roman Helmets went unnoticed. I do wonder what the people driving by think of the 6+ foot catapult in the driveway, and all the broken swords all over the yard.

[AprilTN]

If you must dissect owl pellets, and then want to save the tiny tiny bones of the prey so you can impress all of your friends, DO NOT leave them on the ledge that runs across the wall along the basement steps. They WILL get knocked over and they are not easy to find on indoor/outdoor carpet.

 

:tongue_smilie:

[K&Rs Mom]

wearing a giant soft-sculpture king's crown, and it probably is best to take off the Pope's Miter before getting the mail, even though last year 4 children running up the cul-de-sac in Roman Helmets went unnoticed. I do wonder what the people driving by think of the 6+ foot catapult in the driveway, and all the broken swords all over the yard.

 

How'd you get it away from the Pope to begin with? ;)

[elegantlion]

If you're going to have a lightsaber battle in the front yard in the middle of the day, you have to forget about the reactions from neighbors that drive by. It's PE, don't you know!

[chiguirre]

If you do buy the sanitized owl pellets, don't leave them on the pantry shelf with the other hs supplies because some candy-hound 7yo WILL sample it. He spit it out right away (and I am SOOO glad it was sanitized) but still...:ack2::ack2::ack2::ack2:

[Stacia]

Warn your husband if you're going to leave a model of the Nile made of brown dirt in a baking pan in the kitchen in the dark.

 

Also, be prepared to store the Nile in safety from the cats who think it's a nifty source of 1) drinking water, 2) grass to nibble once the 'crops' start growing, 3) dirt to dig in, and ultimately 4) a litter box. :001_huh:

 

Also, if you make a model of the Earth's layers using melted red hots as one of the layers, don't expect to ever get them out again. Melted (then cooled) red hots are stronger than concrete, I think. Use a jar you can toss, lol.

[TXMomof4]

If you do buy the sanitized owl pellets, don't leave them on the pantry shelf with the other hs supplies because some candy-hound 7yo WILL sample it. He spit it out right away (and I am SOOO glad it was sanitized) but still...:ack2::ack2::ack2::ack2:

 

My experience was with a 2-yo tasting it, but I'm glad to know I need to keep my guard up in the future! BOYS!

[melissel]

This is the part the Activity Guide didn't explain, much to my chagrin. So far ours has been used to give the movers-and-packers something to think about.

 

:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

[Mrs Mungo]

I've always sort of liked the idea of burying it and then moving away. Then I could fantasize that someone else dug it up and was trying to figure out why?

 

OBVIOUSLY because you worshipped chickens and considered them sacred. That is what archeologists will know about you when they dig it up in the future.

 

My sister collects elephants and we tease her all the time that she will be a priestess of the sacred elephant god in a far-flung future history book.

[Mrs Mungo]

If you must dissect owl pellets, and then want to save the tiny tiny bones of the prey so you can impress all of your friends, DO NOT leave them on the ledge that runs across the wall along the basement steps. They WILL get knocked over and they are not easy to find on indoor/outdoor carpet.

 

:tongue_smilie:

 

Also do not place them on top of a bookshelf...where they will be hit with a frisbee scattering tiny animal bones throughout your living room.

[Needleroozer]

If you decide to dissect the real owl pellets from the real owls that live in the trees in your yard (and nevermind telling me that the owl pellets you buy are real and come from real owls -- I'm not impressed), be sure to sterilize the real owl pellets first.

 

I was just going to post the exact same thing! Like minds think great and all that.:D

[tuckabella]

Explain at length to your children (boys especially) that even though you adore their vivid imaginations and understand that they need time to act out every battle scene or adventure they ever see in movie format, museum diorama, or re-enactment - IMMEDIATELY - others may not understand or appreciate being trampled, pummeled, or stabbed as they go about their daily business, so a little descretion is called for.....

 

Regena

 

Wow, this is my son!

[Unicorn.]

Beware of starting a new 4-H project. Yes, spinning is fun. And later, when you own 2 spinning wheels, 8 looms, a closet full of yarn, a grain silo full of raw fleece, three new barns, and 42 sheep, all of whom are having lambs, you MIGHT want to reconsider!

 

I think at this point, it's too late to reconsider! :lol:

[Doran]

If you decide to dissect the real owl pellets from the real owls that live in the trees in your yard (and nevermind telling me that the owl pellets you buy are real and come from real owls -- I'm not impressed), be sure to sterilize the real owl pellets first.

 

 

We were supposed to sanitize them? :confused: "But, Mom! The little bacteria have a right to live!"

 

Doran

[LisaNY]

Beware of starting a new 4-H project. Yes, spinning is fun. And later, when you own 2 spinning wheels, 8 looms, a closet full of yarn, a grain silo full of raw fleece, three new barns, and 42 sheep, all of whom are having lambs, you MIGHT want to reconsider!

 

*snicker* - C'mon, fess up, Margaret, you haven't come clean with how many carders and combs you have....:sneaky2:

[Ravin]

No, you may not dissect the mole/lizard/bird the cat dropped on the doorstep!

 

Why not? Just sterilize/preserve them first...

 

wearing a giant soft-sculpture king's crown, and it probably is best to take off the Pope's Miter before getting the mail, even though last year 4 children running up the cul-de-sac in Roman Helmets went unnoticed. I do wonder what the people driving by think of the 6+ foot catapult in the driveway, and all the broken swords all over the yard.

 

If I drove by, I'd think you were in the SCA.

 

This is great, keep them coming. So far all we've learned is, you can't use the pepsi-mentos reaction for a paper maiche volcano, unless you build the volcano around an unopened container of pepsi, because pouring the pepsi defizzes it too much for the reaction to work. Should have watched more Mythbusters before we tried it.

[Mrs Mungo]

Why not? Just sterilize/preserve them first...

 

 

 

If I drove by, I'd think you were in the SCA.

 

This is great, keep them coming. So far all we've learned is, you can't use the pepsi-mentos reaction for a paper maiche volcano, unless you build the volcano around an unopened container of pepsi, because pouring the pepsi defizzes it too much for the reaction to work. Should have watched more Mythbusters before we tried it.

 

That just means you need to build your volcano around the soda bottle with just the top sticking out...right? ;)

[LisaNY]

Actually, I only have two sets of carders and NO combs, but one can dream??? I forgot to mention the two llamas and two Border Collies. Oh, and the wish for a Great Pyrennes or an Askbash...

 

Oh, well then, you MUST add a set of combs to your collection! Once you use them, you'll see how beautifully it prepares the wool. I have a set of 5-pitch Vikings, but I can't use them, due to shoulder problems. I have a small set that I now use. I think combing is much faster than carding.

 

What kind of sheep do you own? My two are cross-breeds. One is a Border Leicester cross, (nice, long staple - great for combing) and the other is a Montadale cross (she makes great sock wool - very sturdy and elastic, but not too scratchy).

[LisaNY]

We're down to 30 ewes and 4 rams right now--the one shepherdess is off becoming a Naval Officer. We have Shetlands and Rambouillet/Corriedale crosses. The big sheep are all covered, but we don't cover the Shetlands as they felt.

 

Nice! I think Corriedales are very sweet. Beautiful fleece, too! I had thought one time of getting Shetlands, but most people who've owned them tell me theyr'e a headache - very skittish. Their fleece is gorgeous, though.

 

I recently switched from timothy/alfalfa hay to orchard grass. My sheep love it! The other bonus is that it doesn't have the stems, etc. that get in their fleece. Their fleece is totally clean now. I also use a bin feeder, which also helps to keep things clean. With that many sheep, I'm not sure the bin feeder would be cost-effective for you. I add sea kelp to their minerals to compensate for what may be lacking in the orchard grass.