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Has anyone ever changed your mind?


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#1 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:52 PM

Personally I feel that if I have formed an opinion on some political or social issue, I typically have done my research on the issue and feel strongly about my opinion, as I'm sure most other people do as well about their own opinions.  I generally don't get involved in arguments or debates about those type of issues because I guess I feel like, I know that my mind can't be changed on the issue, and so I assume I'm not going to change anyone else's mind either, so why create conflict.  Not everyone feels this way and I think that's great because although I don't like to debate political or social or religious issues, I think it's probably beneficial for people who enjoy it to go ahead and debate as much as they want.  Anyway, my question is, does anyone feel that they used to have a specific belief or opinion on a political, social, or religious issue, and when you were in a debate with someone about it, the other person actually influenced you to change your mind on the issue?  I'm not looking for specific political statements here, I'm just curious if anyone has ever changed your mind to where you've switched to the other side of the issue or something similar.  


Edited by OrganicJen, 07 December 2017 - 01:54 PM.


#2 SparklyUnicorn

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:54 PM

I change my mind all the time and my views are all over the place.  I truly cannot say I'm in one camp verses another.  I really don't see myself as occupying a side at all.  I take it issue by issue. 


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#3 FriedClams

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:55 PM

Being actively involved in a food pantry changed my attitude about hunger, specifically with the elderly. With all the programs available, the elderly use very few and some are profoundly struggling. I still remain very strong in my political convictions about how to fix the problem, but my heart was changed to the severity of the problem.

Edited by FriedClams, 07 December 2017 - 01:55 PM.

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#4 Word Nerd

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:55 PM

Because of the Backfire Effect, debating a contentious issue with others usually makes people more convinced of the rightness of their views. I'm sure people can and do change their minds on issues, but it's rather unlikely that an online screaming match with opponents does that.


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#5 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:57 PM

Being actively involved in a food pantry changed my attitude about hunger, specifically with the elderly. With all the programs available, the elderly use very few and some are profoundly struggling. I still remain very strong in my political convictions about how to fix the problem, but my heart was changed to the severity of the problem.

 

So for you it sounds like it was your personal experiences that changed your mind on an issue.  Do you think if someone had talked to you about the issue and described their own experiences that you would have changed your views? Or do you feel you needed to see it with your own eyes?  



#6 Carol in Cal.

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:58 PM

Yes, I would say that my tilts have been changed by listening to arguments.


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#7 SparklyUnicorn

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:58 PM

Because of the Backfire Effect, debating a contentious issue with others usually makes people more convinced of the rightness of their views. I'm sure people can and do change their minds on issues, but it's rather unlikely that an online screaming match with opponents does that.

 

Very true, and I rarely engage in that sort of debate anymore. 



#8 8circles

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:59 PM

Yes.

 

Hearing from people who shared their raw, personal experiences (that are often really hard to hear since they can come from places of deep pain) with things that I thought I had an informed opinion on has been a gift - I had to be humble, open, and willing to accept it though. It is so difficult to do this, though, that I'm not surprised more people don't do it. It's hard to realize that views that I once held, and fought for, were responsible for other people's pain.


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#9 Tibbie Dunbar

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 01:59 PM

Yes. I have *learned* a lot from other people. None of us can be experts on everything, and it's good to have an open mind.

 

Sometimes, especially in this era, when somebody feels they have thoroughly researched an issue, what they've really done is exhausted one or two angles, from an incomplete set of sources. Our biases lead us to listen to our camp more, but also to weigh the most extreme or radical expression of the other side as the actual argument of the other side. (For example, if we're liberal, and are trying to give due weight to conservatives so that we can think of ourselves as "open minded" - but we only listen to Glenn Beck because we already know we're going to dismiss him.)

 

It takes a lot of time to listen authentically. It takes even longer to move past illogical biases and bigotry that were installed (often by parents) in our formative years. But if we honestly want to understand and learn, a mindset of "I've totally researched this, so I'll smile and nod while you keep talking," will seriously hinder both goals.

 

 


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#10 Seasider

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:02 PM

Meeting and learning about people who are experiencing with the exact opposite of my own opinion has been what has changed how I think about certain issues in life. Very little is as cut and dry as it appears on the surface.

ETA editing to change "health" to "own." Meeting others in the opposite boat has definitely changed my thoughts about health care, but it's not limited to that issue. Dang voice text & autocorrect.

Edited by Seasider, 07 December 2017 - 02:16 PM.

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#11 nixpix5

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:02 PM

Because of the Backfire Effect, debating a contentious issue with others usually makes people more convinced of the rightness of their views. I'm sure people can and do change their minds on issues, but it's rather unlikely that an online screaming match with opponents does that.


Yeah, this right here. Normally as people argue their point they become more convicted and as they listen they are typically not hearing per se, but looking for pieces of the argument to counter argue. Sometimes someone seeks information because they are already on the fence, this is typically the only way I have seen change or have changed myself.

The other piece is most people are convicted not because they are ignorant, vindictive and so forth, but because their own unique experiences have given them insight in a way that makes one way make more sense to them over another. People come into belief with intricate back stories, experiences, training and exposures. I doubt one conversation, unless deeply profound, could make much difference.
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#12 hornblower

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:06 PM

I've changed my mind about lots of things. In the words of some politicians "my views have evolved" :) 


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#13 Tanaqui

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:12 PM

I've changed my mind... but not usually from debate, which always seems to boil down to me vs. the lowest common denominator of the other side.

 

Funnily, I've succeeded in changing a few minds on two specific high-drama issues, which I'm not naming because I don't want to open those cans of worms. But in those cases, the people I was speaking to were not completely set in their ways, and I managed to stumble upon the single argument that wouldn't make anybody defensive. (And now I use those arguments on those topics every time, with some success. Yay!)


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#14 trulycrabby

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:21 PM

Yes, I would say that my tilts have been changed by listening to arguments.


I sure did read this wrong the first time. :o
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#15 OneStepAtATime

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:23 PM

1.  Yes I have changed my mind.

2.  I love good discussions and even gentle debates but have little interest in heated, contentious, "no respect for anyone but those who follow lock step with me" types pf debates.

3.  I am FAR more likely to listen and genuinely consider the other's point of view if the following are in place:

  • They are not rude or deliberately combative (passionate is fine).
  • They seem to be basing their views on facts not media sound bites.
  • They are willing to listen to my side, as well.  (They aren't just waiting for breaks in the conversation to slam my own views.)
  • They are willing to genuinely discuss and share, not just ram their own views down my throat.

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#16 Arctic Mama

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:24 PM

One, maaaybe two points have I changed my mind on because of an internet discussion, where I already had a formed opinion. On things I’m ambiguous or non-commital on its more likely. I don’t kneejerk to a position as a rule so usually it’s pretty tough to change my mind, as I’ve thought through it before taking a stance.

#17 Aura

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:28 PM

Absolutely. 

 

Because of the Backfire Effect, debating a contentious issue with others usually makes people more convinced of the rightness of their views. I'm sure people can and do change their minds on issues, but it's rather unlikely that an online screaming match with opponents does that.

 

Agreed. Arguing with me does very little to convince me of anything, and I know too many people who just use arguing as an attempt at inflating their ego. But...

 

Yes.

 

Hearing from people who shared their raw, personal experiences (that are often really hard to hear since they can come from places of deep pain) with things that I thought I had an informed opinion on has been a gift - I had to be humble, open, and willing to accept it though. It is so difficult to do this, though, that I'm not surprised more people don't do it. It's hard to realize that views that I once held, and fought for, were responsible for other people's pain.

 

Listening to people's experiences and actually discussing things with them has been very eye opening to me. It was very humbling to find that what I grew up believing, what I was taught, what I was sooo sure of... that none of it was how it worked at all for many people!

 

This board and the huge variety of people and experiences has been wonderful for me personally.


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#18 SparklyUnicorn

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:30 PM

I sure did read this wrong the first time. :o

 

LMAO!

 

Same thing happened to me.


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#19 onelittlemonkey

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:35 PM

I change my mind all the time and my views are all over the place. I truly cannot say I'm in one camp verses another. I really don't see myself as occupying a side at all. I take it issue by issue.


This ^^^

I think it’s a good thing to be able to listen to other people and adjust your opinions. We grow and change. At least we should.
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#20 rainbowmama

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:37 PM

Yes, I have definitely changed my opinion on many things as I've encountered new ways to look at things in the course of a light-hearted debate.


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#21 trulycrabby

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:37 PM

Yes, I have changed my mind by listening to other opinions.

Homeschooling was one of the most notable examples: I was strongly against it because a few people I used to know were doing a really awful job at it and their kids have severely struggled as adults. Then, a very nice lady moved nearby, and she has done a GREAT job of homeschooling her three kids. She never showed irritation when I asked lots of questions, never tried to tell me how wonderful it is or how the kids got a better education. She never had to, because when it's done right, it's patently obvious that children don't have to attend school to be well-educated.

Then I bought The Well Trained Mind, which changed my whole world.

Edited by trulycrabby, 07 December 2017 - 02:38 PM.

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#22 unsinkable

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:38 PM

Yes.

Hearing from people who shared their raw, personal experiences (that are often really hard to hear since they can come from places of deep pain) with things that I thought I had an informed opinion on has been a gift - I had to be humble, open, and willing to accept it though. It is so difficult to do this, though, that I'm not surprised more people don't do it. It's hard to realize that views that I once held, and fought for, were responsible for other people's pain.


So you're not surprised more people aren't as humble as you.
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#23 heartlikealion

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:43 PM

I have mixed feelings on some issues, to the point where I have trouble stating aloud how I feel. For example, on the one hand I think it should be against the law to not wear a seatbelt because so many people that normally wouldn't wear them will do so to avoid a fine (at least this is my impression) and this seems like a good safety measurement. On the other hand, I think if someone doesn't want to wear one that's their personal choice. I met someone that said they knew someone that got strangled by the seatbelt in a crash? so they did not wear them.

 

I don't think smoking weed should be illegal, but I also don't want legalization to mean I have to worry about running into it everywhere, either. Like people smoking it near a building entrance. I don't live in a state where it's legal, though.

 

 


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#24 TechWife

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:46 PM

 

1.  Yes I have changed my mind.

2.  I love good discussions and even gentle debates but have little interest in heated, contentious, "no respect for anyone but those who follow lock step with me" types pf debates.

3.  I am FAR more likely to listen and genuinely consider the other's point of view if the following are in place:

  • They are not rude or deliberately combative (passionate is fine).
  • They seem to be basing their views on facts not media sound bites.
  • They are willing to listen to my side, as well.  (They aren't just waiting for breaks in the conversation to slam my own views.)
  • They are willing to genuinely discuss and share, not just ram their own views down my throat.

 

 

This sums up what I would have written. 

 

I sure have changed my mind about a lot of things in the past five years or so. 


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#25 Tanaqui

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:50 PM

I met someone that said they knew someone that got strangled by the seatbelt in a crash? so they did not wear them.

 

Okay, but that's really stupid. I mean, the odds of being killed by a seatbelt vs. being saved by a seatbelt are virtually nil. I mean, I see the "personal choice" argument, but that's a stupid choice. Edit: Um. Not that I think this argument will change any minds. I'm expressing my shock! If I wanted to convince people, I might be more polite.

 


Edited by Tanaqui, 07 December 2017 - 02:51 PM.

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#26 creekland

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:50 PM

A debate has never changed my mind.

 

Experiencing real life certainly has.  Sometimes that's seeing it in person.  Sometimes it's hearing stories from those who have experienced it in person.

 

I use those experiences pretty much every day when I teach - to open minds among the teenagers I get to see.

 

Learning empathy is the phrase I would put with it all.  I had very little (none?) as a youngster myself.  That's terribly common TBH.  Then as a teen, when one's mind opens up to the larger world around them, it's important to be exposed to that world from more than just one's own bubble of experiences (no matter what those experiences are).  From that, minds get changed.

 

In my area, some folks often lament at how much kids are "ruined" (mind-wise) when they go away to college.  The thing is, they aren't ruined.  They meet many, many folks from outside their bubble and realize those folks are human - just like them - usually with similar dreams/goals, etc.  Once one learns that, it's difficult to go back to thinking something else...


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#27 heartlikealion

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 02:58 PM

Okay, but that's really stupid. I mean, the odds of being killed by a seatbelt vs. being saved by a seatbelt are virtually nil. I mean, I see the "personal choice" argument, but that's a stupid choice. Edit: Um. Not that I think this argument will change any minds. I'm expressing my shock! If I wanted to convince people, I might be more polite.

 

I thought it seemed kinda stupid, too given the odds, but it made me do a double take about pushing him to buckle up. I think I drove him somewhere. We were young adults.

 

Where I live I've seen much worse imo. Kids and teens riding around on ATVs or golf carts or whatever where they could just roll out and die. People putting children in the front seat that are too young to sit there, etc.



#28 fraidycat

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:13 PM

I can’t say for sure that one single person has changed my mind.

But the arguments they make, coupled with the facts they share has definitely opened the door to learning new things.

From there I can look at things from different angles, hear from more people, and change or make up my mind on issues.

There are many things that I *thought* I had made informed opinions on, but reality is that I did not grow up in a bubble. NONE of my opinions were solely my own. Nobody’s are. We learn what we live. Every opinion is informed by others.

So yes, someone else has always had a hand in shaping, forming, and changing my mind. And will continue to do so until the day I die. I keep learning, growing, and changing and I hope to never stop.
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#29 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:22 PM

Yes.

Hearing from people who shared their raw, personal experiences (that are often really hard to hear since they can come from places of deep pain) with things that I thought I had an informed opinion on has been a gift - I had to be humble, open, and willing to accept it though. It is so difficult to do this, though, that I'm not surprised more people don't do it. It's hard to realize that views that I once held, and fought for, were responsible for other people's pain.


This is what I have experienced too...but I don't think anything anyone has said in a debate over an issue has changed my mind. I think meeting people and seeing with my own eyes how a person who I believe is being honest has been affected by something is useful for me, but I don't think any argument someone has made in any debate has made much of an impression in my beliefs.
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#30 Pawz4me

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:23 PM

I can’t say for sure that one single person has changed my mind.

But the arguments they make, coupled with the facts they share has definitely opened the door to learning new things.

From there I can look at things from different angles, hear from more people, and change or make up my mind on issues.

There are many things that I *thought* I had made informed opinions on, but reality is that I did not grow up in a bubble. NONE of my opinions were solely my own. Nobody’s are. We learn what we live. Every opinion is informed by others.

So yes, someone else has always had a hand in shaping, forming, and changing my mind. And will continue to do so until the day I die. I keep learning, growing, and changing and I hope to never stop.

 

^^This.^^ Exactly.

 

My 20 yo self could have made the OP. My 54 yo self -- No. I've lived too much and experienced too much to close the door once I form an opinion. I'm too aware now of how things can happen to change my opinion--debate/discussion, a personal experience, etc.

 

Or maybe I'm just not a black/white person and it just took me awhile to realize it. ;)


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#31 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:24 PM

A debate has never changed my mind.

Experiencing real life certainly has. Sometimes that's seeing it in person. Sometimes it's hearing stories from those who have experienced it in person.

I use those experiences pretty much every day when I teach - to open minds among the teenagers I get to see.

Learning empathy is the phrase I would put with it all. I had very little (none?) as a youngster myself. That's terribly common TBH. Then as a teen, when one's mind opens up to the larger world around them, it's important to be exposed to that world from more than just one's own bubble of experiences (no matter what those experiences are). From that, minds get changed.

In my area, some folks often lament at how much kids are "ruined" (mind-wise) when they go away to college. The thing is, they aren't ruined. They meet many, many folks from outside their bubble and realize those folks are human - just like them - usually with similar dreams/goals, etc. Once one learns that, it's difficult to go back to thinking something else...


This is similar to what I've experienced as well.
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#32 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:30 PM

^^This.^^ Exactly.

My 20 yo self could have made the OP. My 54 yo self -- No. I've lived too much and experienced too much to close the door once I form an opinion. I'm too aware now of how things can happen to change my opinion--debate/discussion, a personal experience, etc.

Or maybe I'm just not a black/white person and it just took me awhile to realize it. ;)


I'm not a black and white person and I change my opinions based on what I learn; my point I guess that I must not have expressed well, was that my opinions have never been changed through a debate. They have been changed through reading studies, meeting people, personal experiences etc, but never through a debate. I've certainly had useful discussions with people that have been illuminating regarding social or political issues, but no one has ever changed my mind through debating me. So I'm curious if others have had their minds changed in a debate with someone.
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#33 Monica_in_Switzerland

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:34 PM

Yes.  But only when debating with intelligent, conscientious debaters, not with people who are just shouting their opinions to see if they can out-shout the other side.  

 

For example, my religious conversion took place after an 18 month debate with my brother in the form of 1-2 well thought out and heartfelt emails per week, back and forth, between the two of us.  Book readings and recommendations from both of us to the other, etc.  


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#34 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:40 PM

Yes. But only when debating with intelligent, conscientious debaters, not with people who are just shouting their opinions to see if they can out-shout the other side.

For example, my religious conversion took place after an 18 month debate with my brother in the form of 1-2 well thought out and heartfelt emails per week, back and forth, between the two of us. Book readings and recommendations from both of us to the other, etc.


That's interesting. I wonder if part of what worked was the time involved so that unlike in a typical debate, there was actually time for each of you to think through your responses so that they were meaningful.
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#35 Pawz4me

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:42 PM

I'm not a black and white person and I change my opinions based on what I learn; my point I guess that I must not have expressed well, was that my opinions have never been changed through a debate. They have been changed through reading studies, meeting people, personal experiences etc, but never through a debate. I've certainly had useful discussions with people that have been illuminating regarding social or political issues, but no one has ever changed my mind through debating me. So I'm curious if others have had their minds changed in a debate with someone.

 

Well, debating an issue is sometimes where studies and facts I may not have been aware of are brought up. So for me it's pretty much impossible to separate those two. I can research an issue for days or weeks and I still might miss a very worthwhile study that someone I'm debating is aware of. Also, debating here and on other message boards for me comes under the heading of personal experience and meeting people. So again--pretty hard to separate.


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#36 Sadie

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:43 PM

Yes. Twice :)

 

I used to be in favor of French style niquab bans. Now I'm not. 

 

I used to think it was ridiculous that lesbians and gays wanted to embrace that most conservative of institutions, marriage. Now I don't. 

 

Mostly my views are very grounded, and difficult to shift. The things I care about and believe in now, are pretty much the same things I cared about and believed in when I was 12. 

 

When I have changed my mind (it's been more than twice, but those are the big ones) it's been because of someone talking to me quietly but persistently, and making decent points. 

 

 

 

 



#37 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:47 PM

Because of the Backfire Effect, debating a contentious issue with others usually makes people more convinced of the rightness of their views. I'm sure people can and do change their minds on issues, but it's rather unlikely that an online screaming match with opponents does that.


Yes I think this is what I've experienced and why I don't like to bother with it. Thanks for giving me a name for it!

#38 SparklyUnicorn

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:47 PM

Okay, but that's really stupid. I mean, the odds of being killed by a seatbelt vs. being saved by a seatbelt are virtually nil. I mean, I see the "personal choice" argument, but that's a stupid choice. Edit: Um. Not that I think this argument will change any minds. I'm expressing my shock! If I wanted to convince people, I might be more polite.

 

I dunno.  I do understand how sometimes a personal experience CAN make us very leery about a situation even if the reasoning is completely false.

 

My mother died from ovarian cancer and I'm convinced it is because she took hormones.  This isn't particularly logical though considering there could be 100 other reasons I could attribute to it.  You can't talk me out of it though!


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#39 Teacher Mom

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:48 PM

Yes, my husband. I was determined never to marry again and told him "No" multiple times. Guess he convinced me -- married for over twenty years. 


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#40 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:50 PM

Yes. Twice :)

I used to be in favor of French style niquab bans. Now I'm not.

I used to think it was ridiculous that lesbians and gays wanted to embrace that most conservative of institutions, marriage. Now I don't.

Mostly my views are very grounded, and difficult to shift. The things I care about and believe in now, are pretty much the same things I cared about and believed in when I was 12.

When I have changed my mind (it's been more than twice, but those are the big ones) it's been because of someone talking to me quietly but persistently, and making decent points.


Were those people who were talking to you and making the decent points making general points about the issues that other people could have made, or were they sharing their own personal experiences that changed your mind?

#41 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:51 PM

Yes, my husband. I was determined never to marry again and told him "No" multiple times. Guess he convinced me -- married for over twenty years.


:)

#42 Sadie

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 03:59 PM

Debates are a form of sport, besides anything else. It's verbal exercise. When you play sport, you aren't always looking for revelations. 

 

However, in one of two examples I gave up thread, my mind was changed in a heated debate, where I was the most heated debater. So it does happen. 

 

I also experienced immediate self doubt once when someone I respected (here) whose statements were always seemed very logical to me, yelled at me in CAPS with their sarcasm completely hanging out. And I was all 'man, they yelled at me. And I think they are very knowlegable about all the things. So....I'm wrong ? Oh man, I'm wrong!'

 

No, I won't name them :)

 

Sometimes the nicest, most patient people, with good will on their side and mine, have completely failed to convince me of their argument (but, I end up liking them more anyway).

 

The most effective conversations I have had (again, here, because IRL is a bubble) is with someone from a very different perspective, but we have some shared points of reference. Again, this person knows a lot, can debate, but most importantly can ask questions and doesn't really take argument personally. I think my conversations with that person have helped make my thoughts more coherent. 

 

So - all kinds of conversation can work or not work, depending. In my experience, anyway.

 

 

 


Edited by Sadie, 07 December 2017 - 05:29 PM.

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#43 Sneezyone

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:02 PM

Yep. I was originally in favor of civil partnerships until the arguments against gay marriage started sounding alarmingly like those used against miscegeny. Something clicked for me at that point. It wasn’t the for folks who changed my mind but those against.

Edited by Sneezyone, 08 December 2017 - 03:57 AM.

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#44 Sadie

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:02 PM

Were those people who were talking to you and making the decent points making general points about the issues that other people could have made, or were they sharing their own personal experiences that changed your mind?

 

The niquab thing came from someone making a decent point others could have made - it wasn't from personal experience at all.

 

The marriage thing was from hearing lots of people's personal experiences with discrimination as lesbians and gays. And understanding that equality under the law was an important part of healing that. And honestly, that was less a personal shift than a cultural shift. People's attitudes here changed a lot over the last 5-10 years. 


Edited by Sadie, 07 December 2017 - 04:06 PM.

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#45 Patty Joanna

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:05 PM

Interesting post / editorial in Washington Post coincidental...posting.  Read it post haste.  

 

https://www.washingt...m=.27dba7c627d7

 

And yes, I have changed my mind on a lot of things based on discussion or further research on my own or seeing how a position I took played out.  

 

But I wouldn't say I'm willy-nilly, nor will I say that anyone has *ever* convinced me of something by saying it louder.

 

 

 


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#46 amy g.

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:09 PM

Yes, but the people who have changed my mind have done so have done it through grace and quietly and consistently living out their own beliefs no matter what.

I’ve been changed by others’ examples, not their rhetoric.
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#47 OrganicJen

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:10 PM

Interesting post / editorial in Washington Post coincidental...posting. Read it post haste.

https://www.washingt...m=.27dba7c627d7

And yes, I have changed my mind on a lot of things based on discussion or further research on my own or seeing how a position I took played out.

But I wouldn't say I'm willy-nilly, nor will I say that anyone has *ever* convinced me of something by saying it louder.


Very interesting article thank you!

#48 Garga

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:10 PM

I'm not sure I've changed my mind over the course of a single debate or conversation. But have my opinions/beliefs changed over my lifetime? 100% yes.

It's by listening to many conversations and having many experiences that I've shifted my thinking on things, some of them a 180 degree shift.

A quick example: Before I had kids, I was 100% of the mindset that children should be controlled and should instantly obey. Today I am so far from that mindset that I can barely believe it was myself who used to have that mindset and I'm appalled when someone else has it.

I had absolutely thought through the "control your children and make them obey" belief and thought I was believing the correct thing. I had read articles and had learned from people around me, etc. I was sure that I had researched it thoroughly. Maybe I had, maybe I hadn't. All I know is that I now believe that I was completely wrong in that belief and am glad it changed.
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#49 fraidycat

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:11 PM

Interesting post / editorial in Washington Post coincidental...posting. Read it post haste.

https://www.washingt...m=.27dba7c627d7

And yes, I have changed my mind on a lot of things based on discussion or further research on my own or seeing how a position I took played out.

But I wouldn't say I'm willy-nilly, nor will I say that anyone has *ever* convinced me of something by saying it louder.


Great article! Thanks for posting it.

#50 Sadie

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Posted 07 December 2017 - 04:13 PM

Oh, I thought of something else. 

 

(Yes, we are on summer break, and I am procrastinating, and no, I don't have chores right now!)

 

Some issues I don't so much as change my mind, as get a more rounded picture. For example, I'd still put myself on the BLM side of the equation, BUT, I feel like I've heard and understood more about the lives and challenges of LEO's from listening to people here who are LEO's or have LEO partners or family. 

 

What else ? Oh, a friend talked with me about family members who voted a particular way that is a zillion miles from the way I'd ever vote, and I got a less caricatured picture from her description. So I tend to think of her family members first, and my mental picture second. That makes for a better picture, imo. 


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