I am excited about it, really. I know I'm gonna bawl my eyes out when they leave (this last two weeks have given me a glimpse w/ DH away, DS incommunicado at camp, and DD working) but if I find a FT job that I like OR my DH actually retires, I think my life will be busy and rewarding in different ways. We were married for seven years before DD so it'll probably go back to (something like) that. My only fear is that one or the other of my peeps will partner up and generate grandkids before DH and I are ready to hang up our tourist shoes. I want to be available to help.

The head coach at our gym in Hawaii refused to coach elites after his daughter's experience. At the time DD was competing, one of the team's gymnasts was traveling to/from the Ranch in TX (with a different coach) to train with the national team/Karolyi's. That was 7 years ago? I've always wondered if she was abused too.

LOL! Join the club!

Not picky, selective. That’s a level of trust I haven’t found since college. Adulting these days practically requires plastic, superficial relationships. Le sigh. It’s hard.

This is why you need a good group of IRL girlfriends!

We’re out here in these streets, ok? Not that other things aren’t helpful but this is important for me and a solid 1/4-1/3 of other women. Unicorns are real, real, I say!

Let me make this perfectly, crystal clear. I am apparently a unicorn who achieves the best, most explosive climaxes through penetration. The inability to do that is a deal breaker for me.

Umm, no, I didn’t shame the guy. I’m sure he has a perfectly wonderful relationship with someone else. We attempted, it was a disaster, and we agreed never to revisit the incident. By proudly, I mean that I am not the least bit ashamed to express my preferences. If a tiny appendage isn’t for you, yeah, that’s an ok thing to own.

Pretty much. There are so few cars (new and used) on lots right now. They practically sell themselves.

If it’s a marriage especially, and you’re waiting until marriage to have sex, then yeah, I think there’s some teamwork involved in addressing those expectations. No one is suggesting randomly switching partners will solve anything. This discussion has clarified for me that I shouldn’t leave it entirely to DH to shape DSs understanding of coupling. We’ve talked about porn in the context of managing/maintaining reasonable expectations but not about partner satisfaction. Not sulking when you hear no, not initiating when you know your partner is in pain, etc. Those things matter.

Very little wiggle room on pricing. Basically, take it or leave it. We bought DDs used car last month, cash, still no budging.

Given the stats, do you really think women with male partners are EQUALLY conditioned to expect/advocate for orgasmic satisfaction? Performance anxiety is a thing, sure, but why would that affect women with male partners so much more than women with female partners?

DH is like the old man of the mountain. He knows all the things. Lol. ‘When Harry Met Sally’ wouldn’t pass the sniff test.

Oh for heavens sake, no one said it always was/is…they simply pointed out that anatomy can be a barrier and has been for some of us.

I never said there was a systematic problem with partners. Geeze, I said it was conceivable to me that anatomical barriers exist, that it was problematic FOR ME, when a partner was insufficiently endowed. That’s it. I think I’ve made it pretty clear that I think women with male partners have been hornswaggled into thinking orgasm is generally elusive and unlikely the vast majority of the time. I’ve also said I think it’s possible to determine compatibility absent sex if both parties are open and frank about their preferences and needs. Buuuut, I also think sometimes we don’t know that we even have a need until we’re confronted with something that is contrary to those needs because all of this is so hush, hush. When there is a 20-30% difference between orgasms in heterosexual/bi women and lesbian women and heterosexual men, I’m sorry, that’s not a med issue. I get that referring to non-orgasmic sex as a chore or grin and bear it may be upsetting but what else is it when we normalize climax for men and not women and hold up non-reciprocal gift-giving as a generally accepted practice (and not for temporary or medical related reasons)? It serves to passify.