Vent about special snowflakes

[TX Native]

Honestly I think unless the phone was a very good one with lots of great everything and LARGE I wouldn't be attracted to using it on a regular basis. Even on my tablet I do not type stuff. I find it incredibly slow, painful, annoying. My vision is poor and I have a tough time seeing stuff on these tiny screens. People wonder why older people don't care for this stuff, my theory is in part vision issues.

 

I never use my phone unless we go somewhere for a few days and I just need SOMETHING.

I get this! I only caved into texting/smart phones when it became incredibly inconvenient for everyone else around me to not have 24/7 access to texts and emails. I don't get the huge labor people claim it is to pick up a phone and leave a voice message for small things (except I can understand the pain it is for large group communication.) I like reading full sized print and typing on full sized keys. I upgraded to the bigger iPad very soon after they came out for that reason.

 

About FB...I use my simple common name (if my name was unusual I would pick something like Jane Smith), a fake birthdate, strict privacy setting, and not a personal picture (something like my avatar). Having FB staff find out I broke the rules and gave false info about my page is the least of my 1st world worries. I have no FB friends and only use it for a couple secret groups that prefer to communicate via FB.

Edited March 13, 2017 by TX native

[SparklyUnicorn]

I get this! I only caved into texting/smart phones when it became incredibly inconvenient for everyone else around me to not have 24/7 access to texts and emails. I don't get the huge labor people claim it is to pick up a phone and leave a voice message for small things (except I can understanding the pain it is for large group communication.) I like reading full sized print and typing on full sized keys. I upgraded to the bigger iPad very soon after they came out for that reason.

 

About FB...I use my simple common name (if my name was unusual I would pick something like Jane Smith), a fake birthdate, strict privacy setting, and not a personal picture (something like my avatar). Having FB staff find out I broke the rules and gave false info about my page is the least of my 1st world worries. I have no FB friends and only use it for a couple secret groups that prefer to communicate via FB.

 

I don't think I've yet inconvenienced anyone, but I do feel pressure sometimes to have a better phone.

 

Don't get me wrong.  I'd love to have one.  I just can't justify the cost for what would be only a toy for me. 

[Guest]

I live in a small town in a rural area, and many of the groups in which I participate are very diverse. Meetings are a pain for the members who have to drive 30-60 minutes to get to town. If it's an evening meeting, people have to pay for babysitters; if it's a daytime meeting, people who work cannot attend.

Btw, prepaid cell phone gets you internet for $40/mo.

Yes, prepaid cell phone gets you internet for forty in a less rural area than mine.

We have one choice that offers enough coverage that we can acfually get service if stuck and wanting a tow truck or ambulance, so the price is higher here. Enjoy your cheap internet...we are about five years away from having those kind of choices.

 

Just to clarify for others, meeting in person is not a requirement for my groups. People can and do call and participate via speakerphone. my literacy volunteer group even matches tutor/student pairs who can meet on a facetime type of apps.

[KungFuPanda]

That would drive me nuts.

 

Although I would be tempted to make ALL communication through text for everyone.

 

"Sally has informed me that she does not read emails and doesn't check FB, and I can't communicate 3 ways, so we will communicate through text messaging from now on to accommodate Sally."

 

I volunteer and there are two special folks who send me MULTIPLE emails asking me questions I have already answered in other emails to the group, but they want individual attention.

 

Makes me nuts.

I live for these requests since they added the "send again" button on gmail. Sometimes with "Here it is again, Sally" in the subject line :-)

[SparklyUnicorn]

Oh yeah another issue.  My tracphone has terrible reception.  I cannot make or receive calls in my house (I do not live rurally).  The phone also does not work a couple of places I take my kids regularly which really stinks given the fact I bought them for that reason.  So basically when I go there I just don't drop them off.  I stay and wait. 

 

 

[Guest]

I would not be in a group that can't get their business done in a meeting. Use an agenda, everyone come prepared, and once a decision is made,go with it. I do not have the time to be following a facebook discussion of an issue.

Ha! Ha ha ha!! I have a better chance of finding a unicorn in my basement than getting 20 people in a room at the same time!! That is why we moved to fb years ago and it works well except for this woman.

[Janeway]

I know lots of people who don't use FB. So I would never have that as a main way to communicate. I do believe there is a way to set up auto text messages. My children have had preschool teachers and kinder that use this. Perhaps you could set that up. I think you put one message in and it goes out as both texts and emails.

[Guest]

I know lots of people who don't use FB. So I would never have that as a main way to communicate. I do believe there is a way to set up auto text messages. My children have had preschool teachers and kinder that use this. Perhaps you could set that up. I think you put one message in and it goes out as both texts and emails.

Isn't that the definition of a Special Snowflake? One person who forces the whole group to change?

[FaithManor]

Ding ding ding! Winner!

 

I get soooo mad if anyone puts me on those blasted text reminders. I have 11 kids. Do y'all have any idea how many text reminders that can be on any given day?! And that's not even my stuff, that's all their stuff!

 

Make an agenda for the meeting. Plan and carry through accordingly. Too much is put off until the last minute bc people don't get their act together and presume everyone else will just be ready at the last minute to. No. I won't. I'll decide to do something else with my time.

 

I'm not going to read reports or debate of the issue on FB or email.

 

I own a smart phone. It has a calendar on it. The calendar sends me reminders when I have entered info I want reminded about.

 

I rarely give out my cell number just to avoid mass reminder or other texts and who knows who calling over some dumb thing they could have figured out if they'd shown up at the meeting or read the newsletter.

 

I don't do many FB groups. They are hard to follow and I do miss much of what's in them.

 

I do check my email once or twice a day. I do not have email sent to my phone bc again - that would be a crap ton of near constant interruptions with notifications.

 

And yet despite this, I'm usually well informed and on time and mostly prepared. Because a well organized group is not dependent on last minute planning.

I wish this were the case for rocket team. For launches, we are 100% weather dependent, and many times do not have more than two days notice that windspeeds or visibility ceiling are going to absolutely cooperate.

 

So my advice to parents is if they can't handle the spontaneity of launches - and team members do not have to attend 100% of launches, only 75% so they have some room in there - then don't join. That is simply how it is with such an endeavor.

 

Regular 4H club meetings are however different and planned out six months in advance. The only time there are last minute changes are if dh and I fall prey to something like the vomit flu in which case I would think parents would be happy to find out the meeting is canceled instead of have us around spreading the love, or when winter storms pop up, and we don't want the teen drivers to make a risky choice to attend so we cancel. We do set a "if school is canceled our meeting that night will  be as well" policy but sometimes everything is fine during the day, and then bam gets bad after school lets out so a group text is about all we can do. 

[TeenagerMom]

I totally feel you.  Our sole source of communication for our HS group is Facebook, primarily because it's free and we are a small group.  If someone inquires about joining, I tell them up front that is how we disseminate information.  If they want info, they have to join. I don't care if they use a dummy account to do so, but the group leaders don't have time to send out communication 6000 ways.  I am very much a believer in personal responsibility and I don't hold people's hands.  I will post 1 or 2 mass reminders of events on our FB Group, beyond that, I won't do anything.  The event is posted, a reminder goes out, it's on you to show up.  I won't send out a text reminder the day before, etc.  Every adult in our group has the capability of writing things down on a calendar.  I expect adults to be adults and manage their own time if they want to participate in events.

 

We also don't wait on late comers for events.  We start at the allotted start time.  To ask field trip sponsors (businesses, etc) to wait on people to show up is just rude.

[poppy]

Send a group text and a group FB post and an email if you need those people to show up. It would be easier to do that than do the volunteer work yourself, right?

Please don't do this. My Girl Scout leader does this . I get three notifications for everything . She had 7 assistant leaders and we ALL get a text , a Facebook notification and an email .... because one lady "forgets " to check . Her laziness is now not just the main leaders problem, but mine as well.

 

Is it a big deal? No. But it is off putting . Don't make the extra demanding person's issue a problem for all the other volunteers . Is my advice.

Edited March 13, 2017 by poppy

[Catwoman]

Isn't that the definition of a Special Snowflake? One person who forces the whole group to change?

I think everyone agrees with you that the woman is a nuisance. The problem is that you seem to need her to do volunteer work for you, so ultimately she is the one holding the cards. It's not fair to you, but if you need her, you also need to be able to contact her and be sure she reads your messages, so you're probably going to be stuck contacting her via her preferred method.

 

I'm sorry she's so difficult for you to deal with. I hope you're able to find someone else to replace her. :grouphug:

[MomatHWTK]

I have my FB account hidden and only use it for business research. I seldom check the account. I only text with my DH. But I don't volunteer either, so I guess it's all good. 

[LucyStoner]

No it's really not. It's against their rules. Of course you can do it, but if they figure that out they will ban you.

I have a friend whose real birth name was flagged as a fake name so she uses a fake name to use FB. Irony.

 

I use an online only name for all non-work related social media now.

[Murphy101]

I wish this were the case for rocket team. For launches, we are 100% weather dependent, and many times do not have more than two days notice that windspeeds or visibility ceiling are going to absolutely cooperate.

 

So my advice to parents is if they can't handle the spontaneity of launches - and team members do not have to attend 100% of launches, only 75% so they have some room in there - then don't join. That is simply how it is with such an endeavor.

 

Regular 4H club meetings are however different and planned out six months in advance. The only time there are last minute changes are if dh and I fall prey to something like the vomit flu in which case I would think parents would be happy to find out the meeting is canceled instead of have us around spreading the love, or when winter storms pop up, and we don't want the teen drivers to make a risky choice to attend so we cancel. We do set a "if school is canceled our meeting that night will be as well" policy but sometimes everything is fine during the day, and then bam gets bad after school lets out so a group text is about all we can do.

Of course there's an exception to every rule, but still your rocket team tells the parents the situation they are committing to up front. So I don't think that makes it an exception to the rule that planning and avoiding last minute communication is something possible and reasonable to expect in an organization. I would say the 4H does too. Sure there's going to be the occasional scheduling problem, but my point remains that in a good group, that's not the norm for everyday organization of things.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Please don't do this. My Girl Scout leader does this . I get three notifications for everything . She had 7 assistant leaders and we ALL get a text , a Facebook notification and an email .... because one lady "forgets " to check . Her laziness is now not just the main leaders problem, but mine as well.

 

Is it a big deal? No. But it is off putting . Don't make the extra demanding person's issue a problem for all the other volunteers . Is my advice.

 

You could deal with this yourself. You can set an address to automatically send the message to the trash.

 

Don't know if there is a way to block notifications on Facebook, but I'm guessing yes.

[poppy]

You could deal with this yourself. You can set an address to automatically send the message to the trash.

 

Don't know if there is a way to block notifications on Facebook, but I'm guessing yes.

The texts are the worst. I do converse with her privately as well so don't want to block her.

 

I don't really blame her for bombing everyone ... I blame 'I don't read emails' . I do not like people who, when offered a variety of communications options by the person running things , refuses to be a part of its except on own very narrow terms . It's childish .

[school17777]

The texts are the worst. I do converse with her privately as well so don't want to block her.

 

I don't really blame her for bombing everyone ... I blame 'I don't read emails' . I do not like people who, when offered a variety of communications options by the person running things , refuses to be a part of its except on own very narrow terms . It's childish .

 

I had several ladies who refused to read the emails and came late to announcements, the two ways that we communicated, so they never knew what was going on. The one lady would always say that she couldn't get on email at her house because her internet wasn't reliable, however, she was able to get on facebook, so it was very confusing to me.

[FaithManor]

I had several ladies who refused to read the emails and came late to announcements, the two ways that we communicated, so they never knew what was going on. The one lady would always say that she couldn't get on email at her house because her internet wasn't reliable, however, she was able to get on facebook, so it was very confusing to me.

Special snowflake syndrome.

 

The collective "we" should not cater to it either as it only makes the disease spread.

 

If she could access her facebook, she could access her email. It was all just diva behavior to get attention. I have found that the divas do move on if the group does not feed the drama. Life is better when they leave.

[mamaraby]

I guess I'm a special snowflake then. My dds are in the same Girl Scout troop and they use a private FB group to communicate. I don't have FB and am not going to sign up for one. Our GS troop leader copies the announcements she posts on FB and sends them to me via text.

 

I volunteer regularly, show up on time for meetings, respond as needed, and my daughters are usually top sellers for fall sales and cookie sales. No, I'm still not going to open up a FB account.

[Wheres Toto]

I met one mom who was interested in giving our 4-H club a try. 

 

She wasn't on Facebook but her husband was.  But very inactive so he/she may or may not see any posts

She didn't have email

They didn't have a home phone

She had a cell phone but she only turned it on every few days because she was worried about EMP

 

Not sure what you could do in that situation.

[unsinkable]

I guess I'm a special snowflake then. My dds are in the same Girl Scout troop and they use a private FB group to communicate. I don't have FB and am not going to sign up for one. Our GS troop leader copies the announcements she posts on FB and sends them to me via text.

 

I volunteer regularly, show up on time for meetings, respond as needed, and my daughters are usually top sellers for fall sales and cookie sales. No, I'm still not going to open up a FB account.

Well, I would definitely do my best to communicate with you outside of FB.

 

I don't belong to FB myself but if you needed to an alternative to the majority communication mode, I'd do it.

 

I know running groups can have annoyances but in all the situations I've volunteered for, I try not to let the annoyances suck the joy from why I am volunteering in the first place. It sounds like your girls get a lot out of Scouting and for me, I'd hate for them to miss it bc I needed to make an extra <({whatever})> be it a phone call, email, text, etc...

[ondreeuh]

You can use the Remind app. You set up a group, people sign up, and you can send out one message that goes through both email and text.

 

Or ask Sally to have FB send her notifications every time something is posted to the FB group.

[FaithManor]

I met one mom who was interested in giving our 4-H club a try. 

 

She wasn't on Facebook but her husband was.  But very inactive so he/she may or may not see any posts

She didn't have email

They didn't have a home phone

She had a cell phone but she only turned it on every few days because she was worried about EMP

 

Not sure what you could do in that situation.

Not your problem really. If she is determined to be difficult to contact, then she can't expect communication.

[Dmmetler]

Please don't do this. My Girl Scout leader does this . I get three notifications for everything . She had 7 assistant leaders and we ALL get a text , a Facebook notification and an email .... because one lady "forgets " to check . Her laziness is now not just the main leaders problem, but mine as well.

 

Is it a big deal? No. But it is off putting . Don't make the extra demanding person's issue a problem for all the other volunteers . Is my advice.

And if you use an e-mail to text service, one e-mail (and replies, for some of the group text services) can end up being a lot of texts. Annoying if you're on an unlimited plan, and can make a pay as you go plan less than viable.

[poppy]

It really angers me when people keep saying--oh, you can get a cell phone for only blah blah blah, with internet! Honest to God, there are still plenty of places in the USA that do NOT have ANY cell coverage. I live on the very edge of a really big dead zone. For all carriers. It's not unusual here. We have a stupid booster, Verizon barely works, and I have to be standing in exactly one spot in the kitchen to make phone calls, unless I choose to walk out to the middle of our yard. When we were house hunting, the main thing that disqualified some lovely places was the fact that there was zero cell coverage, and using that True Blue or whatever  satellite company for internet was  going to be more that sucky.

Granted, it doesn't excuse every person from being a special snowflake( and I think that's a phrase that's been used to death) but it does make some people seem very clueless about what is/isn't available in rural areas. People can't even get TV reception unless they pay for Dish/Direct. And yes, they "choose" to live rural.  Except the ones who don't.

 

I have to stand in a special spot in my kitchen to make calls too.......  my tip is,  use wifi.  Use wifi for internet, obviously, but also for calls. It takes a little research but then you are all set. 

 

I get that not everyone understand this, but, that's why I say email or Facebook should be an option, not just text.  I live rural.  Everyone here, except for some of the 90+ year old great-grandmas, has internet on a computer or tablet at home.

[Guest]

Let's just end this thread here. It is a silly thing to complain about when people on this board have real problems.

[Catwoman]

Let's just end this thread here. It is a silly thing to complain about when people on this board have real problems.

Moxie, it wasn't a silly thing to complain about. You were annoyed, so you started a thread. I don't think anyone had a problem with that. :)

 

There will always be people with big problems and people with small problems, and I think there's a place here on the forum for everyone to post about what's going on in their lives. Honestly, if all of the threads were super-serious, I doubt many of us would remain here for very long, because without a balance of serious and not-so-serious topics, the forum could easily become a very depressing place to visit.

[Scarlett]

Moxie, it wasn't a silly thing to complain about. You were annoyed, so you started a thread. I don't think anyone had a problem with that. :)

 

There will always be people with big problems and people with small problems, and I think there's a place here on the forum for everyone to post about what's going on in their lives. Honestly, if all of the threads were super-serious, I doubt many of us would remain here for very long, because without a balance of serious and not-so-serious topics, the forum could easily become a very depressing place to visit.

 

 

Amen!

[felicity]

I guess I'm a special snowflake then. My dds are in the same Girl Scout troop and they use a private FB group to communicate. I don't have FB and am not going to sign up for one. Our GS troop leader copies the announcements she posts on FB and sends them to me via text.

 

I volunteer regularly, show up on time for meetings, respond as needed, and my daughters are usually top sellers for fall sales and cookie sales. No, I'm still not going to open up a FB account.

I'm a GS leader. We use a secret fb group and Shutterfly. Shutterfly sends everything to people's emails. I figure that two methods of communication is reasonable. I just copy/paste the messages from fb to the Shutterfly email address. I wouldn't require anyone to have fb but for some of the parents, that works best. Plus I get to see who has seen a particular message so they can't tell me they didn't get it.

 

I figure that by doing those two methods I'm fulfilling my duties to get info out to everyone. If that's not enough (and it always has been) they'll have to figure it out for themselves. I try not to text except for emergencies.

[elegantlion]

I'm part of leadership of a club at my university. Most people wanted to have all communication be via text as a few claim to not check their email. Based upon previous attempts to contact them that way, I would agree. Which seems stupid because all of the official school communication is via email. So we text, which is fine, but I'm old and sometimes I need to send something too long to text, so I have to text people to remind them to check their email. I love texting way more than I ever thought I would. It's an introverts dream way of communication. But yeah, I would be annoyed to have one person who wanted theirs done in a specific way. 

[Soror]

I had several ladies who refused to read the emails and came late to announcements, the two ways that we communicated, so they never knew what was going on. The one lady would always say that she couldn't get on email at her house because her internet wasn't reliable, however, she was able to get on facebook, so it was very confusing to me.

Yes!!!! We've had that too. Oh, I didn't get your communication, oh, really, why is that I see you on your iPhone checking FB all the time. 

[Valley Girl]

Moxie, it wasn't a silly thing to complain about. You were annoyed, so you started a thread. I don't think anyone had a problem with that. :)

 

There will always be people with big problems and people with small problems, and I think there's a place here on the forum for everyone to post about what's going on in their lives. Honestly, if all of the threads were super-serious, I doubt many of us would remain here for very long, because without a balance of serious and not-so-serious topics, the forum could easily become a very depressing place to visit.

 

Yes. Sometimes the silly complaints or the vents or oh-my-gosh-you-won't-believe-what-that-person-did posts are EXACTLY what people in the throws of something big need just as a distraction for a few minutes. They've helped me more times than I can count.

[teachermom2834]

I have acquaintances that live on FB/IG/Twitter/Pinterest and never put down their phones but absolutely refuse to check email. Then complain that they miss stuff because "I don't check email." Special snowflake in those cases for sure.

[poppy]

Let's just end this thread here. It is a silly thing to complain about when people on this board have real problems.

I come here to escape real problems :)