Cindy in C-ville Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 What changes have your found with your TOM? I'm 42 now and it is so much heavier for a day or two than it ever has been. I'm crampier and can't imagine going for a run. Is this normal? I'm wondering what your experience has been and how long to expect this. Is this peri-menopause? Is this any indication of when the real deal should start? Thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I've noticed the same thing. I think it's the beginning of perimenopause. It's miserable. There are about 3 days I am completely incapacitated by it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom to Aly Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I'm 42, almost 43, and I've never had cramps, real PMS, or anything. But, in the last year or so, especially the last few months, I do get much heavier flow the first two days, and I get majorly down the day before for a couple of days. Plus, totally exhausted, like can't get out of bed exhausted (although I'm always borderline anemic, so I figure this is making me anemic, but it feels like more tired than that, since I'm usually anemic during my period). Plus, I think the last two times, I had a little bit of cramps the first day or two, which I've never had in my life. NOT FAIR!!! Not at all what I bargained for! You would think something would get easier as you got older! My eyes went the day I turned 40--everything has to be held three feet away for me to read it--and now this??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhonda in TX Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I'm 41 and it's much, much heavier. I hate it. I have no idea how long this will last. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
percytruffle Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Almost 46 here. Yes, much heavier but shorter in duration. Also, a fair amount of clotting and cramps. Tis not fun. A run? I can barely stand at times. Teaching forces me to medicate and try to endure it with grace otherwise I'd be on the couch for a few days with my blankie and hot pack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
runamuk Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Mine's always been on the heavy side, but my cycles have gotten shorter as I've gotten older. I finally had to go on the pill when my cycles hit 19 days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Yep--mine is extremely heavy for about 5-6 hours on the 3rd day (how's that for specific?). I'm clotty and I feel I can't be far from the bathroom. Then it's light for a few days after. Weird, huh? I'm actually glad to hear you all have had heavier periods. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura in VA Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I've noticed a change in the last year or so. More cramping the first couple of days and heavier flow. I have a fair amount of clots as well. I don't run or workout other than walking on the first few days. It's a pain (literally). :glare: Oh, and to top it off, I only had a 2 week, 2 day break this last time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle T Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I'm 44. Over the past couple years, it's been common for me to go three or four months without a TOM, then get it for a couple months fairly regularly, then skip again. Very annoying! Yes, I do find that the first day or so is much heavier than it used to be. I also get PMS now, something I never had before. The irritability, mood swings, and sheer hostility are awful. Michelle T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy in Orlando Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 43 here. I've noticed the same things everyone else is describing. It's miserable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in MO Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Me too (43) in the last couple of years: heavier, crampier, tired, bad mood, lasting longer, cycle irregular often shorter. Cindy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EKS Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I don't know if it's normal but I am going to be 41 any minute now and my TOM is totally whacked out. I used to be every 28 days like clockwork. Then my first son was born and it went down to 26 days. Then every since my second son was born things have been all over the place (for me) and frequently (but not always) the flow will be so heavy that I really need to be on top of things for about 12 hours or so. Also, the PMS symptoms have gotten much worse. One thing that has helped with that is Evening Primrose oil. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kim in Appalachia Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 It started getting heavier after my 5th was born. I was 35. My mood swings changed too, getting worse afterwards instead of before. It has been getting worse (being heavier on the 1st two days). It totally drains me. I can cut down on cramping by cutting out dairy the week before it comes. I can't imagine it getting worse after 40??!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soph the vet Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 CRYOABLATION. I was experiencing everything you all are describing (I'm 41). For two years my doc has suggested I do the abovementioned thing and I kept putting it off. Well, I did it in June of this year (as many will remember). Let me tell you it was the best decision of my 40's yet! I still get a period about every 28 days that is MUCH lighter, lasts 3 days and I use mainly pantiliners and go through 6-8 tampons TOTAL!! Only one night with a pad that isn't really needed. I am also less irritable, except of course on the political threads;). The procedure is called Her Option. Find a doctor that does these and get it done! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brigitte Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 All the same here. My cramps got better after having the twins, but have been getting worse again since I turned 40 last Nov. I can't run for 2 or 3 days, because the flow is too heavy to use a tampon alone. I wish menopause would hurry up and get here. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cin Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 A second option: THE PILL. I am on it, with no week off. It is HEAVEN. NO cramps, for the first time in my life (Yup, I missed at least one day of school every month all through high school) and NO PMS (My family LOVES this!!!). I take a month off every six months just because I feel like I should. My OBGYN has told me it's not really necessary but its' just wrong to never have a period, right?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 At 49 my TOM is more frequent -- I used to have a longer than average cycle of 30-35 days, now I have a shorter cycle of 25-30 days. Also, the duration is much shorter. Some months are heavy, but usually it's the same as always or lighter. The biggest difference I see is according to what I've been eating. If I drink nettle tea daily and take a certain type of enzymes, everything's hunky-dory. If I'm living on chocolate chip cookies and, heaven forbid, even take a couple of sips of coffee (I rarely drink coffee, and generally have no desire for it), then the floodgates open and I want to recline on the couch like a delicate flower. My mood swings also vary with diet, particularly with fats. If I get cod liver oil I'm a much happier person. I stopped exercising during the heavy days years ago -- I decided it was a good excuse for a couple of days off. Also, I do yoga, and don't do inversions those days, so that added to my thought of "why not take a mini-vacation?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Virginia Dawn Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 44 here. The day or two of clotting each month has stopped, thank goodness. The day one killer headaches have stopped too. Now I'm getting some symptoms I've never had before: bloating, swelling and tenderness in the chest area and shorter cycles this year - after years of longer than normal ones. However, I'm also greatful that even though they come every 26 days, they are regular and I don't get any surprises. My mom says the physical symptoms weren't that bad for her, hopefully I will be the same. However, it was about that time that she emotionally checked out of her life and left my dad. That scares me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRAAB Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I must be the odd woman out here. I'm 48, my cycles are very regular, 28 - 30 days, moderate to light and short in duration. I've never experienced cramping (since I was a teen, anyway) or heavy cycles. However, I had my last baby (twins) at 40 and nursed for the next 3 years. Would that impact it? Personally, I'd be fine missing all of it. Janet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TraceyS/FL Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 39 for another month here and feeling very normal all of a sudden.... Misery loves company! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I guess I'm normal... The surprising moodiness, bloating, cramps, headache and fatigue along with the need to stay at home near the bathroom are making menopause look a good thing. For me though, I'm almost glad when it starts because the PMS is over. There has been more than one month that I'd have called in sick. Like the others, I take an over the counter and do it. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMindy Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 I haven't noticed a huge change in the actual flow. I would say mine are light with mild cramping. But, I've started getting migrane-type headaches on the first day!! Blech!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted October 20, 2008 Author Share Posted October 20, 2008 Thanks for commiserating! I have a procedure to remove a polyp in a couple of weeks and plan on talking about "Her Option" at that time. For those on bc pills, I've hated the idea of that b/c of not wanting synthetic hormones running through my body, weight gain, etc. Anyone want to convince me that this is the way to go? Thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5knights3maidens Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Wow, I'm glad I read this. Sounds like me. I'm 46 and last year I was completely miserable in mood. Now my cycles are changing..this last one was very light and short. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Virginia Dawn Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Are you taking fish oil? That really helped me with the headaches. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaylk in tx Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 i had one in january. since then my periods have gone from extremely heavy for 5-7 days with lots of clotting to extremely light for 2 days. bad cramping is gone as well and i'm not afraid to leave the house! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMindy Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Thanks for commiserating! I have a procedure to remove a polyp in a couple of weeks and plan on talking about "Her Option" at that time. For those on bc pills, I've hated the idea of that b/c of not wanting synthetic hormones running through my body, weight gain, etc. Anyone want to convince me that this is the way to go? Thanks! Nope!!! I hated bc pills. They really whacked out my emotions. The best thing about dh's vasectomy was no more bc pills!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diana in OR Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 i had one in january. since then my periods have gone from extremely heavy for 5-7 days with lots of clotting to extremely light for 2 days. bad cramping is gone as well and i'm not afraid to leave the house! I just had this done in September! So far, I've had one period and it was much lighter than I'd been having, although probably still heavier than many women experience. Like you, however, I can leave the house without a change of clothes now.:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cin Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 For those on bc pills, I've hated the idea of that b/c of not wanting synthetic hormones running through my body, weight gain, etc. Anyone want to convince me that this is the way to go? Thanks! I didn't notice any weight gain, and since my DH & DDs are still alive, it's been worth it for me. I had to take Rx pain medicine every month and was still out of comission for at least one day. In bed was preferred but not with a 3 yr old! And PMS for me was HORRIBLE. I would gain momentum from the previous month, just in time to lose it all with PMS and 3 days off. Then I'd start the cycle all over again (no pun intended!) It has definitely been an answer to prayer for me (and DH!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raini Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Soph, do you know when Her Option is recommended? Has it helped with PMS- cramping, bloating, general misery? Can I ask what Dr you went to for this (I'm in the Cities too)? My dh works for the company that makes this product, so I've been interested in it- but I don't know if my symptoms are bad enough. Thanks :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted October 20, 2008 Author Share Posted October 20, 2008 Raini, I'm interested in your questions too - wondering how this impacts PMS, if at all ... The lighter/non-existent periods are attractive, but if it helps with the other, that kind of puts it over the top for me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Thanks for commiserating! I have a procedure to remove a polyp in a couple of weeks and plan on talking about "Her Option" at that time. For those on bc pills, I've hated the idea of that b/c of not wanting synthetic hormones running through my body, weight gain, etc. Anyone want to convince me that this is the way to go? Thanks! I was having serious pain from endometriosis. My dr. put me on the pill and no more pain. I did not have any weight gain and as an added bonus my skin cleared up and I gained a cup size in the books department. Only down side was a serious dent in my libido. My dh is only home two days a week and he doesn't complain but it bothers me and I am considering going off the pill again for just this reason. A lot of the side effects depend on exactly which pill your are taking so if you are considering this discuss it with your dr. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 Check! Also, totally wacked out PMS--unreasonable anger. (Fixed that with borage oil--a miracle nutrient!) I'm just waiting this out. I don't want to have any surgery. I figure my mom ended at 53, and I'm almost 51. This can't last forever. There IS one really good effect. I'm kind of warm, pretty much all the time. I don't get hot flashes, but I'm just generally warm and dislike stuffiness. Since I've been colder than most people most of my life, this is refreshing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted October 20, 2008 Author Share Posted October 20, 2008 So, Carol, talk to me about borage oil. How do you sort through fish, flax, primrose, borage, and whatever else I'm leaving out? You all are SUCH a wealth of kx! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carol in Cal. Posted October 20, 2008 Share Posted October 20, 2008 (edited) So, Carol, talk to me about borage oil. How do you sort through fish, flax, primrose, borage, and whatever else I'm leaving out? You all are SUCH a wealth of kx! Borage oil has the same active ingredient as Evening Primrose Oil. I take 1-2 1300 mg (or mcg? don't remember) capsules once I start getting really, really unreasonable. Fish oil has a different kind of omega oil than borage or EPO. Borage has omega 6's and fish has omega 3's. I've heard that most Americans have too much omega 6 in their diets, and should beef up on omega 3's, but that has not been the case for me. When I take the borage oil, I feel a noticable shift for the better in my feelings. It is quite dramatic. When I first started taking it, I used the recommendation to take once capsule night and morning starting on day 14 and continuing until day 1, but I find that I don't need it that much. Now that I am advanced in my perimenpausal state, I'm finding that the borage oil doesn't hold up during the last day or two of my cycle, even if I take extra. My doc has prescribed a hormone, but I have resisted taking it so far. I would prefer to avoid that. Others have done well with natural progesterone cream, but I have not tried it. Edited October 21, 2008 by Carol in Cal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
6packofun Posted October 21, 2008 Share Posted October 21, 2008 I'm going to be 37 this month and mine has been heavier and more clotting since I had my tubes tied after baby #6. I wouldn't say I have mood swings or much cramping at all, but man the clots are just gross. :glare: It's more of an inconveniece for the first 1-2 days than anything else but I'm used to really having it easy compared to most other ladies I know! Not so anymore and I'm sure it's a combo of approaching 40 and having the tubes tied. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted October 21, 2008 Author Share Posted October 21, 2008 Thanks 6pack! You made me think of other questions! What other variables, beside age, do you think factor in? Number of children? Tubal? What else? Or, do you think these factor in at all? Anyone else have experience with borage oil? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soph the vet Posted October 21, 2008 Share Posted October 21, 2008 Soph, do you know when Her Option is recommended? Has it helped with PMS- cramping, bloating, general misery? Can I ask what Dr you went to for this (I'm in the Cities too)? My dh works for the company that makes this product, so I've been interested in it- but I don't know if my symptoms are bad enough. Thanks :) Hi Raini, It is recommended for women 30-50 who experience really heavy or prolonged periods but do not have large fibroids. You would have to do an endometrial ultrasound and biopsy first (minor, IMO). I will PM you with doc info, I just love him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sahamamama Posted October 21, 2008 Share Posted October 21, 2008 I'm 41, almost 42. Had 2 C-sections, both breeches, one with twins. Had a tubal ligation along with the twins' C-section. Thyroid cancer in between the pregnancies. I have an almost 4 yo and two almost 2 yos. Sigh. I am tired all the time. OK -- TOM. Crampier, but I thought that was because of the post-Cs. Also, my muscles in the front are SHOT, we are actually looking into reconstructive surgery (abdominoplasty) to pull it all back in, because my linea alba split and won't reconstruct on its own. I went to 38 weeks with the twins, both 7 pounders. We're talking HUGE, here. It's been almost 2 years and I still look and feel terrible. Sorry, I digress. Back to TOM. Crampier. Heavier at times. Also, seems to drag on forever, whereas pre-children, it was 3 days and done. Also, I can NOT seem to exercise the abdominals without so much pain the following day that I can't function with the normal duties of my day. But we still think that problem is from the surgeries. HTH. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in C-ville Posted October 21, 2008 Author Share Posted October 21, 2008 Sahamama, I had an abdominoplasty thing after my 6th pregnancy b/c I split in my 4th pregnancy. The recovery was tough - 6 weeks, with the first two being the worst - but it was one of the best things I ever did. I have not had any real back pain since then (and the surgery was 7 years ago), I exercise regularly, and feel great (other than when I'm on my period!). My surgeon was a female plastic surgeon, and she did a FANTASTIC job. I have a scar from hip bone to hip bone, but it's a nice scar. :) She even told me that if I have a special pair of panties or a bathing suit that I want to be able to wear, to wear it in on the day of surgery and she would hide the scar. I don't have feeling from my belly button down to my scar, but I've adjusted to that. I would do this surgery again in a heartbeat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted October 21, 2008 Share Posted October 21, 2008 I think it is normal to have worse periods in your forties. I will be having an ultrasound and an endometrial biopsy for an abnormal PAP smear I had. I have something which has a 25% of being a bad cancer (like uterine) and 75% chance of being nothing at all. I am hoping for the 75% chance of course and since I have an underlying disease that can cause all sorts of abnormalities, I am hoping it is that. It is good to hear that I could have a positive result like beng able to get this procedure done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted October 21, 2008 Share Posted October 21, 2008 Thanks for commiserating! I have a procedure to remove a polyp in a couple of weeks and plan on talking about "Her Option" at that time. For those on bc pills, I've hated the idea of that b/c of not wanting synthetic hormones running through my body, weight gain, etc. Anyone want to convince me that this is the way to go? Thanks! I know you asked for pro-pill info, but here is anti-pill, discussing long term issues. I know a doctor wrote an entire book on the subject, but I don't recall the name. I think it was someone involved in some of the original research that made bc pills possible. There are more negatives than are typically discussed, and some don't appear for years. Of course, as I've said, my issues with cramping, heavy flow, and mood are controllable by cleaning up my diet, adding fish oils (I must typically function with an Omega 3 deficit, I swear, because one tiny capsule changes my skin tone within hours) and getting adequate exercise. If I were dealing with some of the stuff others here were, I'd probably research the pill more. I'm not dissing anyone for choosing to use it -- I've no idea what you're dealing with and what choices you've had to make. But I hate to see women think it's convenient and therefor okay. Just popped into my head: Shepherd's Purse (herb, weed) helps stop bleeding. If my flow is heavy enough to interfere with my life I take some tincture to lighten it up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raini Posted October 21, 2008 Share Posted October 21, 2008 Thanks Soph- do you know if HO relieves PMS symptoms too? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SapphireStitch Posted October 21, 2008 Share Posted October 21, 2008 Ugh...I'm 46 and going through this stuff, too. I remember as a teenager helping in the kitchen when my mom and the aunts were getting ready for holiday meals. They'd be chatting away and groaning about clotting and flooding and late periods and chin hairs and when would this all be over... My teenage cousins and I would shudder and roll our eyes and whisper to each other that we were NEVER going to DO THAT! I'm not sure how we thought we were going to get out of it, and I think we're all firmly in the midst of it now. I'm just ready to get to the "post-menopausal zest" part! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peela Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 I always take care during my period and wouldnt even consider running on the first or 2nd days, even though I have light periods and only get cramps sometimes. It's just the TOM I am especially gentle with myself, and take it easy and get extra rest. I suggest magnesium for the cramps- all month and especially just before- and look into progesterone cream for easing other symptoms. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laylamcb Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 Yes! Weird stuff here, too: It's very heavy for the first couple of days but overall shorter in duration. I too feel exhausted and blue during those heavy couple of days. Not fun, eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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