S/O, lies... how about things you did that turned out well even though no one thought they were a good idea?

[Anne in CA]

For one, no one in my family thought I could home school, or that home school in general was a good idea. Now everyone admits it made my kids better people and that I did a good job.

 

DD just colored her hair blonde, which everyone said was a bad idea but it turned out amazing...

 

Taking the kids on mission trips to third world countries freaked people out, but it all turned out well...

[Ann.without.an.e]

I was also thinking homeschooling

[Guest]

Living in an RV with our six kids and traveling around the country for over a year.

[JustEm]

Dating/Marrying my dh. On paper it looked like a terrible idea. He was in the process of a divorce when we met and became friends. My mom was very concerned when we started talking daily and hanging out as friends. She was convinced we'd fall for each other and it would end in a terrible heartbreak. Well she was right about falling for each other. We started dating right before his divorce was finalized and 3 months later were engaged. my sister was strongly opposed to the engagement and it caused quite the rift for a few months. 4 months later we eloped and dh's sisters both expressed their disapproval.

 

Over 8 years later and we're even more in love and stronger. What people couldn't see is that we spoke extensively about what we wanted for the future. We were on agreement on everything. We also spoke extensively about dh's previous marriage and how it changes him, what caused it to fall apart, and saw those things weren't an issue for us because we were already on the same page.

 

No one thinks it was a mistake anymore. At least as far as I know.

[mysticmomma]

Breastfeeding

Cosleeping

Going back to school

Weight loss surgery

Homeschooling

[RootAnn]

Marrying DH and living apart from DH while he was in the military (while we were married). The communication skills we developed while apart helped once the kid noise & chaos started...and continued.

Quitting my job & moving a month before Baby #2 was born. Staying home with the kids. My co-workers were all convinced I'd go batty at home. Everyone thought making so many changes right before having a baby was a terrible idea.

 

My mom & aunt have come around on DH. They think he hangs the moon now. Since we made it through those first few years apart, no one probably even thinks about it anymore. We're the longest married pair of the five of us. Three others have divorced.

 

I don't really talk to my old co-workers anymore, so I have no idea what they think of me still staying at home. Most of them would probably be shocked that I'm homeschooling - except for the one co-worker whose kids were all homeschooled.  :lol:

[AnnE-girl]

I started dating my husband less than three weeks after his six year relationship/engagement ended. Everyone said it was a bad idea and he needed more time or our relationship would just be a rebound. We were married two and a half years later and we celebrated 11 years in May.

[Cecropia]

Homebirth.  All of our relatives thought we were completely nuts and tried very hard to sway us to the hospital model.  And we were in one of the most homebirth-unfriendly states in the nation, with zero collaboration or support from the medical community (actively prosecuting midwives for practicing medicine without a license, while there were no out-of-hospital alternatives offered).  The midwives we hired were underground midwives.  But I had my first two at home successfully!

[jewellsmommy]

Marrying my dh at 17.5. We have been married now 19 yrs and gotten through many things that are biggies for most marriages -bankruptcy, infertility, severe illness of a child etc. 

 

Pumping exclusively because I couldn't make breastfeeding work. I was told that I wouldn't be able to do it. I was able to keep it up for 8 months. I was happy with that.

 

Co-sleeping/family bed -she did eventually move on to her own bed  :tongue_smilie:

[mamiof5]

Cosleeping

 

Homeschooling (Starting our 5th year, some family members still think it's not a good idea. They might never get over it 😂😂)

 

Rushed move to a different country (decision thought of, taken, packed and moved in 3 days)...have never been back. That was 17yrs ago 😉

 

Tonight's improvised dinner...turned out good

[Lawyer&Mom]

 

Rushed move to a different country (decision thought of, taken, packed and moved in 3 days)...have never been back. That was 17yrs ago 😉

 

 

Wow. That sounds like an interesting story!

[goldberry]

Married my DH at 19.  He was 25, no education, living in an apartment with 3 other guys.  ??  We just celebrated 30 years!   :blushing: He is an amazing man...

 

10 years ago we picked up and moved to Colorado... just because we wanted to live here.  It was rough (DH lost his job during the recession and was unemployed 2 years) but we stuck it out rather than moving back to the Dallas area.  So happy!  We never stopped loving it!

[mamiof5]

Wow. That sounds like an interesting story!

It was God's plan. I'm not a risk taker, and I despise moving. Leaving a country??? Nope, no thanks. Everything was so quick, and I'm always amazed how it worked out.

 

The idea was to go for 6 months, a year max. ðŸ˜

[Farrar]

I was also going to say my marriage. Dh fell off the wagon two days before the wedding. It almost didn't happen. Literally as it was happening I kept thinking, well, I love him, but this is probably a huge mistake. But - hey - turned out great! (And he's been sober for 18 years now.)

 

I can't say homeschooling or co-sleeping or homebirthing... I got a lot of good support around those decisions.

[Crimson Wife]

Marrying 2 weeks after my college graduation and a month shy of turning 22. When I announced our engagement my junior year, you'd have thought I was announcing plans to rob a bank by the reaction of my family. My parents especially objected because he is the only serious relationship I've ever had and they thought I needed to "sow my wild oats" as a young adult before settling down at a "proper" age (~30). :glare:

 

Usually college-aged daughters are disappointments to their parents for being too promiscuous but apparently I was a disappointment for being too s*xually conservative and actually wanting to marry my college sweetheart and guy I lost my virginity to.

[LisaKinVA]

Food Fundraisers -- because we're selling something people already were planning to buy (breakfast/lunch), we had a captive audience, and it was better and faster than what was available on base.  We make 2-3x the amount of money in the same amount of time.  People felt they were too expensive (because we had to front $200+ to net $1000, felt it was more effective to run a $500 car wash over 6 hours which cost us about $25).  They all shut up finally after I raised $5,000 in 2 events and less than half the time commitment.

 

Conversely, the other group I was raising money for has raised a whopping $30 on their events, which I have said were bad ideas (poor planning, implementation, lack of advertising).  Yet, the fundraising chair is patting herself on the back because the kids are having so much fun -- and there are more important things than raising money (ahem...not when your JOB is to raise $12 grand so the team can function!!)  Guess which group has approached me to help dig them out of their very big, and growing deeper, hole???

[LucyStoner]

Getting married at 21.

 

We didn't give anyone any time to express their opinion. We just got married and then told them.

 

We are coming up on 15 years so clearly it wasn't a flight of passing fancy.

[frogger]

Wow, I can't think of anything that everyone was against. I can think of things that a few people thought was out there but really I was allowed to just do whatever and no one argued.  That is interesting since I did so many things that society in general tells you not to do like marry at 18, home birth, homeschool but really haven't had much to battle. 

 

 

[*Lulu*]

Homeschooling

 

Having a third child

 

Going across the country for college

[waa510]

Does my whole life count? ;) I seem to do things completely differently than my family of origin, friends, or my in-laws. It's getting to the point where they almost expect me to do the 'weird' thing so when I do there isn't this big shock or uprising. They may have also learned by now that I don't listen! But let's see..

 

Breastfeeding

Homebirth for 2dd

Moving to Japan

Homeschooling

Getting a tattoo

Living anywhere but FL

Joining a UU church

Naming my kids weird names

Getting married at 20 to an Army guy

Having kids at 21 and 23

Going to college for Psych and not for law or med

Buying used cars

Living in a racially diverse area

Staying at home

 

I'm sure there's so much more.  :thumbup1: I'm happy with all those choices though. I think you (collective you) need to make the decisions that will make you satisfied with your life and forget the haters. Too many people are afraid of making some terrible, irreparable decision but so much of your life can be changed. 

 

[Donna]

Marrying my husband before finishing my degree

Co-sleeping

Breastfeeding

Homeschooling

Having a 3rd child

 

My daughter playing traditional Irish music...according to my family she should be playing Bluegrass because she's an American. (Didn't matter to them what genre of music she loved.)

 

[DawnM]

Huh, I have gotten flack for certain things, but never enough grief to think that "everyone" thought it was a bad idea.

 

Homeschooling, yes, people were opposed.

 

Many thought i would never marry.  The good thing about getting married later, people are just happy you are finally marrying.  Only ONE person didn't like my husband, but her reasons were STUPID (she said he was too quiet and I should marry someone more gregarious.)  Whatever, she was a bit jaded after a failed relationship at the time.   We have been married 21 years.

 

Homeschooling, yeah, some people had things to say.  Now they actually say the opposite.  My biggest critic in the family has one child who has done some hard time and another who hadn't been able to keep a job for more than 3 months, so, whatever.

 

Quitting my job.  That was a hard one.  I still have some regrets myself, but it needed to happen to homeschool my special needs child.  

 

 

 

 

[alisoncooks]

No one ever told me, but I'm pretty certain everyone thought I'd drop out of college when I got married at 19. But since I'm contrary, I finished in 3.5 years with a 4.0. :p We celebrated 16 years this summer.

 

My parents were a bit dubious about the whole birth center/midwife thing. Best decision ever.

[MyLittleBears]

Marrying a man 10 plus years older than me at age 22. Best thing I ever did. :wub:

 

Homeschooling

[lllll]

nm

Edited July 27, 2016 by ~ d9n

[Spryte]

I can't really say "no one" thought anything would turn out well.   It feels like my life has been one crazy ride, that's taken a lot of courage, but I've always had support from someplace.  Not family.  I could list volumes of things that certain family members didn't think would turn out well.  But certain other family members have always been supportive, so that makes up for it a bit.  :)

 

Moving out at 17, getting a job and apartment - I wasn't sure that would turn out well, but had no choice.

Moving cross-country, alone, at 21, without knowing anyone in my new location, to go to school.

Anthropology - that wasn't deemed useful enough, what a waste of time/money.

American Studies ("and what the heck is that?! What will you do with it?!").

Fostering my dear friend/mentor/college prof's son when she died.

Getting married to someone who had a child from a previous relationship.

Homeschooling, co-sleeping.

Adopting (again) when we were 40, listening to the chorus of "you're too old" and feeling the anger about that, ouch.

 

There's more, but the overwhelming theme is that the non-support came from one particular group.  I have always had the support of other family members and the family-friends that I've chosen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest]

Having kids and getting married.

 

Sifted out the chafe REAL QUICK around those two decisions.

 

Then dh joining the military. Some thought I was crazy for supporting him on that because they were sure he would wash out. Ha. Excellent, wash out, tomato tomato.

 

After the "having kids" thing there wasn't anyone left to tell me what a bad decision homeschooling was :-D

 

(To be clear, Homeschool is going swimmingly and it is overtly obvious that it was a great choice. Just teasing about the haters who gonna hate hate hate)

Edited July 27, 2016 by OKBud

[Carrie12345]

Not marrying my firstborn's father. Thank goodness I had more sense than that!

Having so many kids.

Not using pain meds during labor.

Raising my kids without religion.

Homeschooling.

Homeschooling high school. (That one hasn't been proven yet, but I'm confident.)

Letting my kids play Pokemon Go.  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

 

[Guest]

Leaving college and getting married YOUNG to an older man. It took a bit but even the most staunch, vocal opposition admitted to me a few years back that I had an amazing marriage and they couldn't have picked a better spouse for me in a million years :D

[Janeway]

Homeschooling, my marriage, my children, my career (and lack of)

[Carol in Cal.]

My first job.  It was a coop engineering job, and people thought that I would drop out of college once I started enjoying earning money of my own.  So ridiculous--I can't believe anyone ever thought I would not finish college.  That was my One True Goal since about age 5.  After 6 1/2 months I went back to school as planned, only with enough money to bag the ridiculous commute.  My grades improved, and I had a tremendous resume boost. 

 

And my first house.  It was a little two bedroom, one bath home built in the 1940s.  What I really wanted was a Victorian, but this was the best I could manage at the time.  It was, naturally, in an older neighborhood, with lots of charm and trees.  The house had tall ceilings and hardwood floors and was unique on the block (all of them were.  No cookie cutter 'little boxes' there.).  BUT.  It wasn't near the better employment areas, and I could have gotten a 4 bedroom/2 1/2 bath modern house near where I worked for the same price.  Everyone said I was nuts, that my old neighborhood was topped out in housing price and buying the newer, bigger home would be a far better investment.  I did not care.  I figured that if I were going to impoverish myself to buy a house on my own, and not be able to afford to go anywhere else for quite a while because of it, that I'd better at least like the house itself, because I was going to be spending a lot of time there.   Ha.  I kept it for 7 years, during which time it doubled in value.  And, more importantly, I was happy there.