Josh Duggar checked himself into rehab

[TXBeth]

From the home page of Reformers Unanimous:

"Reformers Unanimous exists to help the addicted experience a life of victory. This victory is obtained and retained not through an experience of ongoing effort, but through a once in a lifetime decision to accept Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and a subsequent dedication to developing a dynamic love relationship with Him."

 

Umm...hasn't he already accepted Jesus Christ as his personal Savior? If that didn't prevent all this, how is it supposed to fix it? Just pray harder? Sorry, but if he isn't expecting "ongoing effort" I'm pretty sure there isn't going to be any recovery.

[SparklyUnicorn]

About the "program" he's going into...(official papers from the program on the site down some)

 

http://gawker.com/josh-duggar-s-sex-rehab-is-probably-just-another-chri-1726747380

 

ugh..prison sounds better

[albeto.]

A few years ago I was posting about one of my kids needing therapy. I received a really odd offer/suggestion of "biblical counseling" from a fellow member here.

 

This is precisely why I continue to ask the questions that pop into my head. Because this stuff isn't limited to just the Duggars. These ideas sound awfully compelling to the person who trusts the process, who believes it works in their experiences. But these are unhealthy, damaging ideas being promoted. They're dangerous and I don't think anyone *wants* to pass along dangerous advice, or to loose precious time with a child in crisis to chase an impossible dream. Our kids, our husbands, our sisters, our brothers, our friends, and our neighbors are just too damn precious to leave their emotional and mental health to advice that amount to read the bible more, think even harder when you read it, wish really hard that it all works out from now on.

[KungFuPanda]

I have a lot of work to do on my house. I think I need to open a 'rehab center' and get a captive workforce to fix stuff. My current captive work force isn't afraid of me.

[Annie G]

I have a lot of work to do on my house. I think I need to open a 'rehab center' and get a captive workforce to fix stuff. My current captive work force isn't afraid of me.

 

This is a brilliant idea.  

[Mimm]

They are friends of the duggars, and don't even have degrees, let alone licenses.

 

Someone on FJ pulled up pictures of them posing together at a party in the last year.

 

At this point the best you can hope for is that the six months apart will make Anna realize she doesn't need him OR want him.  At least it will be six months without conception.

 

 

ETA:  I feel bad about that last part.  I love and value all children and I would have a dozen if I could.  But right now the last thing she needs is to get pregnant again.

 

:banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

 

 

 

So their philosophy is, you take a bad boy. Make him dig holes in the sun all day. Turn 'im into a good boy.

 

You know, my parents used to do that. They had this big pile of concrete blocks they made my brothers move as a punishment. It never made any sense to me at all. So much for natural consequences.

[FaithManor]

From the home page of Reformers Unanimous:

"Reformers Unanimous exists to help the addicted experience a life of victory. This victory is obtained and retained not through an experience of ongoing effort, but through a once in a lifetime decision to accept Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and a subsequent dedication to developing a dynamic love relationship with Him."

 

Umm...hasn't he already accepted Jesus Christ as his personal Savior? If that didn't prevent all this, how is it supposed to fix it? Just pray harder? Sorry, but if he isn't expecting "ongoing effort" I'm pretty sure there isn't going to be any recovery.

Sooooooo stupid! But just exactly what Jimcreep and Chelleditz would think works for addictions.

 

Well, Anna gets a six month reprieve and then he gets to return with his license to keep on abusing while pretending life is wonderful. Meanwhile, back at the ranch....

 

And the Looney Tunes Show goes on.

[Mimm]

Unless she already is!   :sad:

 

She has a one month old. So it's rather unlikely.

[Luckymama]

She has a one month old. So it's rather unlikely.

Unlikely but not impossible--just ask my mother-in-law :eek:

[JFSinIL]

It's so crazy. He's in our home town in IL!

 

At least he is an hour away from us!

 

[Plink]

http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/josh-duggars-first-rehab-stint-included-heavy-counseling-labor-2015268

 

 

 

 

SPORK, ASAP!

 

Woah!  I just noticed in the very last line of that article that she has a 1 month old.  1 month.  Only a few weeks old!!!  The woman is in the throes of hormone hell and dealing with all of this?!?  Oh, my heart just breaks for her.  

 

I'd like to say that I'm praying for her in a very sincere and thoughtful way, but really my heart is crying for that poor woman.  I just can't even imagine.

[Bluegoat]

From the home page of Reformers Unanimous:

"Reformers Unanimous exists to help the addicted experience a life of victory. This victory is obtained and retained not through an experience of ongoing effort, but through a once in a lifetime decision to accept Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and a subsequent dedication to developing a dynamic love relationship with Him."

 

Umm...hasn't he already accepted Jesus Christ as his personal Savior? If that didn't prevent all this, how is it supposed to fix it? Just pray harder? Sorry, but if he isn't expecting "ongoing effort" I'm pretty sure there isn't going to be any recovery.

 

I guess it would depend on what they think the "subsequent dedication" bit means.  It seems odd to me personally that they separate this "one-time" thing from the subsequent dedication - I think its a remnant of the distinction the reformers made between justification and sanctification, but it doesn't really make sense to me the way they understand it - they seem to have totally personalized it. 

 

[MiMi 4under3]

She has a one month old. So it's rather unlikely.

 

 

Unlikely but not impossible--just ask my mother-in-law :eek:

 

 

It's totally possible! Ask me how I know... or look at my siggy.  :laugh:

[albeto.]

And the Looney Tunes Show goes on.

 

This time God's grace, mercy and redemption will fix him right up!

 

Again. 

[Mergath]

What really makes me ill about this (and perhaps this has been discussed on another JD thread- sorry, haven't read them all) is that if Smuggar contracted an incurable STD from one of his stripper buddies, will everyone still expect Anna to have unprotected sex with him, even knowing that she'll eventually catch it and possibly pass it on to their future children? Do they think that if she just lays back and spreads her legs the way she's supposed to, God will magically keep her from catching his STDs?

[imagine.more]

Woah!  I just noticed in the very last line of that article that she has a 1 month old.  1 month.  Only a few weeks old!!!  The woman is in the throes of hormone hell and dealing with all of this?!?  Oh, my heart just breaks for her.  

 

I'd like to say that I'm praying for her in a very sincere and thoughtful way, but really my heart is crying for that poor woman.  I just can't even imagine.

 

Yeah, I have a 3 week old and I am so angry on her behalf. Regardless of her own possible bad choices in marrying this creep the fact is she is not responsible for his actions and she is still recovering from childbirth! Hormones, physical recovery, sleep exhaustion, caring for four young children, and then you find out your husband has been committed adultery in a premeditated way for the past 2+ years. I cannot even imagine! My husband is rocking our fussy newborn right now while I take a break from nursing...that's what a husband ought to be doing when his wife has just given birth to *his* child! 

[mommaduck]

What really makes me ill about this (and perhaps this has been discussed on another JD thread- sorry, haven't read them all) is that if Smuggar contracted an incurable STD from one of his stripper buddies, will everyone still expect Anna to have unprotected sex with him, even knowing that she'll eventually catch it and possibly pass it on to their future children? Do they think that if she just lays back and spreads her legs the way she's supposed to, God will magically keep her from catching his STDs?

 

According to ATI, her faith and forgiveness of her husband is supposed to protect her from such diseases. (I know, don't shoot the messenger. It is an absolutely abominable teaching) 

[Farrar]

These people and their insular world. They just refuse to learn anything from their mistakes.

[Mergath]

According to ATI, her faith and forgiveness of her husband is supposed to protect her from such diseases. (I know, don't shoot the messenger. It is an absolutely abominable teaching) 

 

And I suppose if she does catch an STD from him, they'll blame it on HER and her lack of faith or whatever.

 

:cursing:  :mad:  :banghead:

[Word Nerd]

That sounds almost like name it/claim it prosperity teachings.

[mommaduck]

And I suppose if she does catch an STD from him, they'll blame it on HER and her lack of faith or whatever.

 

:cursing:  :mad:  :banghead:

 

yes. Lack of faith or hidden sin (another way of blaming someone).

 

[FaithManor]

What really makes me ill about this (and perhaps this has been discussed on another JD thread- sorry, haven't read them all) is that if Smuggar contracted an incurable STD from one of his stripper buddies, will everyone still expect Anna to have unprotected sex with him, even knowing that she'll eventually catch it and possibly pass it on to their future children? Do they think that if she just lays back and spreads her legs the way she's supposed to, God will magically keep her from catching his STDs?

Oh yes. This is what Smuggar Duggars believe. And of course if prayer and being a good girl doesn't protect her than the mysterious "will of God" get's trotted out so everyone must draw on their happy faces because God apparently likes it when people die of AIDS, Antibiotic resistent Syphillis, ....

[Mergath]

Oh yes. This is what Smuggar Duggars believe. And of course if prayer and being a good girl doesn't protect her than the mysterious "will of God" get's trotted out so everyone must draw on their happy faces because God apparently likes it when people die of AIDS, Antibiotic resistent Syphillis, ....

 

There is no emoticon to express how ragey this kind of stuff makes me.

[zoobie]

Unless she already is! :sad:

She's still prohibited from marital relations until 80 days out. Surely they won't risk breaking more cult rules!

[zoobie]

According to ATI, her faith and forgiveness of her husband is supposed to protect her from such diseases. (I know, don't shoot the messenger. It is an absolutely abominable teaching)

Is this the same magic that keeps rape victims from becoming pregnant?

[Annie G]

If Josh has a sex addiction this program isn't going to cure him. The weekday schedule involves 9 hours of manual labor and no indication of any therapy time. None. There is plenty of 'it's personal' daily devotional time and evening chapel , and church services on the weekend, but it really looks like it's a 'work hard, pray hard' mentality.  No sign of therapy or anything, and they are forbidden to talk about old habits or lifestyles because it's 'against God's word'.    Nope. He's not going to get real help there, and this is no better than the 'therapy' he got when he molested his sisters. His parents haven't learned a thing. 

 

Yeah, he's a grown man and could have chosen his own rehab facility, but I would bet my last spoonful of Ben and Jerry's the this was orchestrated by Jim Bob. 

[HRAAB]

According to ATI, her faith and forgiveness of her husband is supposed to protect her from such diseases. (I know, don't shoot the messenger. It is an absolutely abominable teaching) 

 

What a bunch of BS.  I don't know anyone who is that deluded, and I know some really off the deep end religious types.  How does a thinking human ever get to this point?  

[bolt.]

*That* is *not* a rehab program!

[Bluegoat]

If Josh has a sex addiction this program isn't going to cure him. The weekday schedule involves 9 hours of manual labor and no indication of any therapy time. None. There is plenty of 'it's personal' daily devotional time and evening chapel , and church services on the weekend, but it really looks like it's a 'work hard, pray hard' mentality.  No sign of therapy or anything, and they are forbidden to talk about old habits or lifestyles because it's 'against God's word'.    Nope. He's not going to get real help there, and this is no better than the 'therapy' he got when he molested his sisters. His parents haven't learned a thing. 

 

Yeah, he's a grown man and could have chosen his own rehab facility, but I would bet my last spoonful of Ben and Jerry's the this was orchestrated by Jim Bob. 

 

What is supposed to be their theory behind having people work in order to overcome problems?

 

I mean - I can see some of that - giving people something to do that can be accomplished and is concrete can be helpful, maybe especially if it is connective - working in a garden or with animals for example.  But I don't really think that is what they are thinking.

[FaithManor]

What a bunch of BS. I don't know anyone who is that deluded, and I know some really off the deep end religious types. How does a thinking human ever get to this point?

I would imagine it is the same mental path that eventually lead to drinking the Kool Aid Jim Jones style. If Gothard ever asked.... YIKES! I hope they never make it that far down the primrose path.

[Annie G]

What is supposed to be their theory behind having people work in order to overcome problems?

 

I mean - I can see some of that - giving people something to do that can be accomplished and is concrete can be helpful, maybe especially if it is connective - working in a garden or with animals for example.  But I don't really think that is what they are thinking.

 

I don't know what the theory is...but maybe if they keep him busy enough he'll be too tired to think about the porn he'd rather be watching.   

 

I don't think the method is going to work- it didn't work when they used it after discovering he fondled his sisters. 

[Audrey]

The 10 principles of Reformers Unanimous

 

http://reformersrecovery.com/read-the-10-principles

 

I can't find what training the counselors have.

 

 

No training.  Just Kool-Aid packets.  Lots.

[Audrey]

Oh my:

 

"Each student will serve as a volunteer in some fashion from 8-10 hours per day, and partial days on Saturdays. All work is considered donated services. Please understand that if you do not work as unto the Lord, you will not remain in the home. Proverbs 14:23 says, “in all labor there is profit†at Reformers Unanimous we believe work is God’s divine design for every man, and woman. Hard work develops character which is vital to making right decisions once you have finished with the program."

 

 

Mm... yes.  Another construction project.  That worked so well for Josh last time.  :glare:

[Liz CA]

Safer (and more fun) than gagging on Lucy's spork.

 

Just sayin'.

 

Let us lift a spoon of ice cream instead, perhaps with a little whip cream and some rasped chocolate on top....

[Liz CA]

She's still prohibited from marital relations until 80 days out. Surely they won't risk breaking more cult rules!

 

Almost gagged on my ice cream...80 days from the time of adultery????

[Audrey]

According to ATI, her faith and forgiveness of her husband is supposed to protect her from such diseases. (I know, don't shoot the messenger. It is an absolutely abominable teaching) 

 

That, right there, is a double sporker. 

[Bluegoat]

I don't know what the theory is...but maybe if they keep him busy enough he'll be too tired to think about the porn he'd rather be watching.   

 

I don't think the method is going to work- it didn't work when they used it after discovering he fondled his sisters. 

 

No, it seems like he needs more.  It's not impossible that time away from his family-cult craziness might give him some space to see how out of step with reality his situation is, and he's also a lot older which makes a difference.  I'm not convinced that he is necessarily a pervert in any sort of biological sense - maybe he is, but his issues could be more about his situation which is just so abnormal. 

 

But - does he have the tools to see that?  He doesn't seem terribly insightful, and I am not sure that he is aware enough of other ways of thinking to have anything to turn to - it is pretty hard to abandon your thought system when you have nothing at all to replace it with to make sense of the world, or even a sense that there might be other ways.  He isn't just going to think "well, maybe I should think about becoming Catholic," he wouldn't even know what that would really mean. 

 

And I suspect the focus of the clinic is likely to work against any insights he might gain on his own.

[Farrar]

It's just so clear that environment and messed up teaching about s*x, relationships, the whole thing are what caused this. A ton of these ATI people have publicly had issues like this. I think it's clear that it's in the message. Yet they don't see it. They're all so brainwashed.

 

The only thing I keep thinking is how much I want Anna to get out. I have a dream of her meeting all the HA people and escaping this whole crazy. And really... I have that dream for all the women caught in situations like hers who just aren't in the spotlight. Find your way out.

[Liz CA]

Oh yes. This is what Smuggar Duggars believe. And of course if prayer and being a good girl doesn't protect her than the mysterious "will of God" get's trotted out so everyone must draw on their happy faces because God apparently likes it when people die of AIDS, Antibiotic resistent Syphillis, ....

 

Oh God. We need to pray for someone to come alongside this girl and lead her out of the cult. I skimmed the other thread and it seems like she has a brother who offered her sanctuary if she only took him up on it.

 

Normally I am all for counseling, seeking help and exhausting all avenues but there comes a time when one needs to draw a line in the sand.

[Joanne]

Applying more of the same crap that created this mess.

 

Awesome.

 

These places do more harm than good; they are not even benign.

[OnTheBrink]

From the home page of Reformers Unanimous:

"Reformers Unanimous exists to help the addicted experience a life of victory. This victory is obtained and retained not through an experience of ongoing effort, but through a once in a lifetime decision to accept Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and a subsequent dedication to developing a dynamic love relationship with Him."

 

Umm...hasn't he already accepted Jesus Christ as his personal Savior? If that didn't prevent all this, how is it supposed to fix it? Just pray harder? Sorry, but if he isn't expecting "ongoing effort" I'm pretty sure there isn't going to be any recovery.

 

This was the excuse my EX used. He wasn't saved! So, he went out and "repented" but by golly, that didn't seem to work at all! He continued to cheat with anyone he could find on craigslist and yahoo speed dating. 

 

Don't misunderstand me. I completely believe in repentance and I believe people can change their lives with God's help. But it's a heart thing, a humility thing. Not an "oops! Got caught! I'd better make it look good!" thing. 

 

It just pisses me off.  :glare:

[ktgrok]

I can't  believe they can't talk about "old habits". How on earth are they supposed to deal with them if they don't talk about it???? All that's going to happen is he's going to come back randier than every after 6 months of abstinence!

[gardenmom5]

*That* is *not* a rehab program!

 

it's a "hide from the press" program.

 

 

I don't know what the theory is...but maybe if they keep him busy enough he'll be too tired to think about the porn he'd rather be watching.   

 

I don't think the method is going to work- it didn't work when they used it after discovering he fondled his sisters. 

 

I was going to say that . . . . .

 

That, right there, is a double sporker. 

 

I think we should get metal sporks - and use them on his boy bits.

 

No, it seems like he needs more.  It's not impossible that time away from his family-cult craziness might give him some space to see how out of step with reality his situation is, and he's also a lot older which makes a difference. 

And I suspect the focus of the clinic is likely to work against any insights he might gain on his own.

 

It seems like this is just more of the same - and it won't do him any good at all.  just a place to hide for six months.

[zoobie]

Almost gagged on my ice cream...80 days from the time of adultery????

No, from the birth of her daughter. Gothard picked and chose a few Old Testament laws for his peeps to follow.

[LMD]

So he gets a holiday and she gets stuck literally holding the baby in the midst of a mess HE created. Awesome.

 

And I've also seen abusers use the 'I'm saved now, y'all have to forgive me and move on immediately' line. The'saving' part rarely takes when it's a get out of jail free card...

[mommaduck]

I'm worried about the "counseling" she's going to be given....seriously worried.

[Reflections]

Soooooo.... he's going to come home to Anna who has to accept him after a long period of abstinence.  I'm not feeling real good about that. Especially after what the stripper said he did - rag doll and all that.   

 

I'm really really hoping her father steps in and gets her out of there.

 

She can't help herself.  She just can't.  She has to make lemonade - there isn't anything else she can do.  Unless she totally pulls a 180 and writes a tell all book wherein the profits would support her and her children.  I don't see her doing that.

[Mimm]

No, it's 80 days from the birth. :)

 

[mommaduck]

Soooooo.... he's going to come home to Anna who has to accept him after a long period of abstinence.  I'm not feeling real good about that. Especially after what the stripper said he did - rag doll and all that.   

 

I'm really really hoping her father steps in and gets her out of there.

 

She can't help herself.  She just can't.  She has to make lemonade - there isn't anything else she can do.  Unless she totally pulls a 180 and writes a tell all book wherein the profits would support her and her children.  I don't see her doing that.

 

Her father sold her. It was a political marriage for connections.

[Reflections]

Her father sold her. It was a political marriage for connections.

 

Yeah, I was just reading the People article about her brother postings on Facebook.  Her father and mother are preaching no divorce and how would it look.

 

How awful.