Monica_in_Switzerland Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 If you've chosen one solution over another, or tried one and realized the other was better, what advice can you give me? We have three, soon to be four kids. When baby is born, they will be 7.5ds, 5.5dd, and 2.5dd. The baby is a surprise- don't know if it's a dd or ds! For the first 6 months, baby will probably be in our room. So, at the time they start to share, it will look a bit like 8ds, 6dd, 3dd, and baby. I am sorely tempted to put all the kids into one room for sleeping and then have a playroom. I feel like the toys are a distraction to dd2, who sleeps on a mattress on the ground and has never been in a crib. At the end of her nap, I always find her laying on a pile of books and duplos! I figure I would separate out again as the kids hit the pre-teen years, either into a boys room and girls room, or 2 and 2 if the baby is another girl. Is it crazy to have 4 kids in one room? It's be one set of bunk beds a regular bed, and a mattress on ground for baby, plus the kid's clothes dressers. I might get those little tunnel things from ikea that fit over a bed to discourage talking at night. :-) Is this an insane idea? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammi K Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 Depending on housing situations we've grouped as many as 4 kids in one room. Our 4 girls shared for several years a double over double bunk that dh built. I generally prefer to have a playroom/family room rather than toys in the bedroom. When they were little, we only had a few select things like favorite dolls or stuffed animals that 'lived' in bedrooms. Other toys stayed out for the way to allow for more room and less distraction in the sleeping area. I was a firm believer that babies needed to learn to sleep through household noise so we never tip-toed around and they learned to sleep through the worst the rest of the gang had to offer. That made it easier to sleep everyone in one place when they were younger. I tended to keep the littlest with us a bit longer than 6 months so we didn't have to worry about chatting until the babies were just as likely to be among chatterers. Do what works best for your sanity. I loved the ideas of huge, beautiful, Pottery Bern perfect bedrooms. But, mostly, that never happened and we did the best with the space we had. Just know that whatever you decide, it isn't carved in stone and it's as simple as re-arranging. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 Just asking to help you-- Playroom questions: Would the toys stay in the playroom, as in, "it's the only place to play," or would they be stored there and it'd be ok to play elsewhere, too? 1 Bedroom questions: Would having everyone in one bedroom make a quiet time (if you replace naptime with quiet time, like some homeschoolers) more difficult to have? Do the kids keep each other up? Would 2yr climb a bunk bed? Maybe you could do 1 bedroom, and put a comfy couch or futon in the playroom that could be used for an extra sleeping space (if someone needs a quiet space, or if someone is sick, or if you have a visitor...). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prairie~Phlox Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 How long would this situation be for? At some point, I would separate them. I think it ciuld work for now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarlaS Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 A mattress on the floor for an infant? How does that work? What are the approximate dimensions of the rooms, and can you put all those beds in without blocking the window? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica_in_Switzerland Posted March 30, 2014 Author Share Posted March 30, 2014 A mattress on the floor for an infant? How does that work? What are the approximate dimensions of the rooms, and can you put all those beds in without blocking the window? Cribs are a relatively modern invention. :-) I have a crib, used it for my two big kids, but just couldn't bear the idea of putting it back up for the third. In our room, I simply placed the crib mattress on the floor next to our bed (did this for all three kids)- only one kid ever rolled off, once. I had a yoga mat on the ground for just in case, so it was a 4 inch fall onto foam. Once my third was ready to go into the room with big sis (6-7 months?) I just put a twin mattress on the ground for her in the corner. At that time and until weaned her, I would nurse her to sleep for naps and just lay her down, no problem. I used a long nursing pillow along the edge to discourage rolling off- she never did. And once she was weaned and going down awake for bed time and nap time, she was just so used to the whole thing that she stayed down when I laid her down. Now that she's hit two, she tends to get up, go get a few books and a few random toys, then lay down and look at books until she falls asleep. This is what it looked like at 6 months: The way the bedroom room is laid out, it has a tall narrow window, so there is space. Not sure what the dimensions are, but there would be room to put all three headboards against the same wall, so all the beds are in a line like in Madeline. :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica_in_Switzerland Posted March 30, 2014 Author Share Posted March 30, 2014 How long would this situation be for? At some point, I would separate them. I think it ciuld work for now. I think I would separate them at the latest in the pre-teen ages, assuming this set-up worked until then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
73349 Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I'd do two bedrooms, with hook and eye latches locking the closets during naptime to limit toy access. Your DS will soon be at an age when he'll want some privacy from little sisters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica_in_Switzerland Posted March 30, 2014 Author Share Posted March 30, 2014 I'd do two bedrooms, with hook and eye latches locking the closets during naptime to limit toy access. Your DS will soon be at an age when he'll want some privacy from little sisters. Oh, if only I had closets!!! I will never understand the European aversion to closets!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PentecostalMom Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I think it will be fine. May I suggest a trundle for the bunk beds? Even a piece of plywood with casters to lay the mattress on, or simply slide it under for extra floor space? We have 2 dd's in a room right now, and little ds and baby's crib are in the other room. We plan to put all three of them in there at some point. My hold-up with all four is that the girls room is so....girly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I'd do 2 bedrooms, with some (quiet-ish) toys, but keep most of the toys in a more public room, like a family room or living room. I'd definitely let toys take over a "daytime" room completely before resorting to crowded sleeping arrangements just to facilitate a separate place for toys to live. (I'm fine with dedicated "playrooms" if there is space for one, but sacrificing sleeping space isn't worth it to me. Kids need to sleep, so that means I might have to live with toys.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I vote for a bedroom and a playroom. I currently have three kids in one room, it will be four as soon as I can convince the three year old he doesn't have to sleep in my bed every night! My kids are happier clumped together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I would try it. Maybe keep baby with you longer so baby can go to sleep earlier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFSinIL Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 The boy will soon just be too old to be sharing with his sisters. He needs his own small space, now or soon (time flies by so fast - he will be a pre-teen before you know it so might as well give him his own space now). My in-laws had two large attic bedrooms and SIX kids, from oldest to youngest b,g,g,b,b,g. They put the two middle boys in the smaller of the two bedrooms, then partitioned off a section of the largest room to make a small private space for the oldest boy. The three girls shared the remaining space, with a set of bunk beds and a small single bed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I would put them all in the same room for a while yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jen3kids Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I think your oldest will be fine to share a room with his sisters for another 3 years, at least. Do they all get along well? My oldest and youngest could not share a room. We moved oldest into his own room (converted upstairs office back into a bedroom) when he was 3. If necessary, my younger 2 could have easily shared a room, probably until dd was 10 or so. So, if your dks get along well, I'd keep them together until your oldest ds needs his own space, and that might not be until he's 11 or 12. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tohru Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I'd give the oldest his own room because he's 8 with some of "his" toys, have the sister's share a room because they're closer in age with some of "their" toys, then put the rest of the toys in the living room :) With the baby, I'd keep the baby in my room until about 3 or so, then put the baby in the gender room. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmmaNZ Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I have ds 9, dd 7, ds 6, ds 3 and ds 1. At the moment we have the oldest all sharing one room. The baby still 'sleeps' with us. It works great for the time being. I am not sure how much longer we will keep it up, but at the moment we have no plans to shuffle things up. We tried to separate them at one point; they all hated it and asked to be moved back together. I like the idea of keeping all the toys in one room - then you can just shut the door! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeacefulChaos Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 Well, I know you wanted input from people with experience, and I don't have any lol, but I think putting them all together in a room would work for awhile, at least. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dory Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 It would completely depend on the personalities of the kids involved. If they liked some space, I would do two bedrooms with a toys chest or closet (or both) that I could lock for the younger room. If they all sleep really well and are more extroverted in personality, then I would put them all in the same room and have a playroom. I would also consider having a few of the toys in a more public area. I have tried to put my boys together. They will suffer through it if I make them, but my youngest doesn't sleep well and he drives his brother nuts. I can pair my dd and my youngest ds or my oldest ds and my dd and both of those scenarios with end with happy children, but I can't put my two boys together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monica_in_Switzerland Posted March 30, 2014 Author Share Posted March 30, 2014 Thank you! A few of these ideas I hadn't even thought of yet! To answer a few questions- yes, all the kids get along well. The most friction is between the two oldest, but they also play the most together and still see the third as the baby and tend to give in to whatever she wants. :-) I'm sure it'll be a rude awakening for her when she gains "big kid" status. I am a bit annoyed at things like the fact that now BOTH kids rooms have boxes of legos in them!!! Argh! Really, this whole thing would be less of an issue if I was not constantly stepping on orphaned legos!!! One of my thoughts is that if there is separate sleeping space, then the bedroom would also be completely baby-safe. That is, no legos! It makes it easier if the baby is "free range" without a crib. And by the time the baby is out of the lego-eating stage, ds will definitely be ready for his own room. Either with little brother or alone with three girls in the other room. I don't think I could keep baby in my room until age 3, I think my husband would go crazy! I'll keep thinking on it. I don't need to make the decision until after baby is born. Maybe if it's a boy we'll go straight to 2-2, maybe not! We'll see! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I would separate into older and younger rooms so the big kids would have a safe place to store their choking hazard toys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy in NH Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 One bedroom, one playroom. It worked well for us for 10 years until oldest ds went away to college this year. We put a gate on the playroom when we had babies, and Legos were/are not allowed out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In The Great White North Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 Our first house, it had six bedrooms. The previous owners had 12 kids, and the doctor told them their asthma issues would be better if they didn't have so many kids in each room, so they added the back three bedrooms. So, apparently, air circulation is also an issue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I'd do 2 bedrooms, with some (quiet-ish) toys, but keep most of the toys in a more public room, like a family room or living room. I'd definitely let toys take over a "daytime" room completely before resorting to crowded sleeping arrangements just to facilitate a separate place for toys to live. (I'm fine with dedicated "playrooms" if there is space for one, but sacrificing sleeping space isn't worth it to me. Kids need to sleep, so that means I might have to live with toys.) This. Also, as kids get older, their needs change, and my two boys who have always shared a room just got split up since their relationship was headed downward. My younger ds moved into college girls' room, with her bed staying in there for when she is with us. He is in a loft bed over her single bed. Neither of them mind sharing that sleeping space since it is a very part-time thing for her. The cat is in there, too. Older ds seems much better with his own room and space and has actually proactively rearranged it a bit, all teenager-y like, which is so unlike him. (That little story is not so much relevant at this point but something to think of for the future.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I grew up in a family of four and it was GGGB. My mom split us by age. For a long time, I, the eldest, shared a room with the youngest. I wasn't napping, so it didn't interfere with baby stuff, and I was the most likely to be quiet when it was time for me to go to bed. I didn't need story time or anything. I could just tiptoe into my room and read a book by a book light and go to sleep. The two middle girls were louder and young enough that they had their own bedtime needs. Plus, at 8 I was feeling like I didn't want to change in front of my next youngest sister, but didn't care about the baby. At some point when the baby got older he shared a room with youngest sister. That way the two eldest were together and the two youngest. Then, when I moved out for college he got his own room. We never kept many toys in our bedrooms so I can't speak to that. Our bedrooms were upstair and were for sleeping and quiet reading. The downstairs was the toy/play area of the house. When we were young enough to 'play' my mom liked it happening where she could see it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bolt. Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I find Lego much more manageable in a room where I spend a lot of time (living room, open to the kitchen) which allows me to supervise the play and teach tidiness and care -- rather than stepping on orphans and fuming. There are desks/tables to play on in there. Also, puzzles are in that room, and watercolour paints. The things that get out of hand whenever they get out if sight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamakelly Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I"d put your son in a room by himeself and the girls together. Then I'd decide what to do with the baby when it's older. You son is going to want a little quiet space from his sisters. I hate playrooms anyways, they just encourage big messes IMO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarlaS Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 Cribs are a relatively modern invention. :-) I have a crib, used it for my two big kids, but just couldn't bear the idea of putting it back up for the third. The way the bedroom room is laid out, it has a tall narrow window, so there is space. Not sure what the dimensions are, but there would be room to put all three headboards against the same wall, so all the beds are in a line like in Madeline. :-) Oh, I see. I never really used mine for... 3 of my 4 kids at all. They slept in my bed until ready for a twin. Never occurred to me to put the mattress on the floor. One of mine would have ended up under another kid's bed, and I would have freaked out in the middle of the night looking for them. lol! Bed placement is an issue in my house due to forced air heating and the stupid vents ending up in the middle of the room. It would be possible in maybe one of our bedrooms to place two twin beds. It was a major nuisance when our kids were little before we added on. We put bunks in one room (two boys) a single twin bed in another and our youngest slept with us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alef Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 My room sharing kids are 10g, 8b, 6g, they are perfectly comfortable being in there together. They mostly go in the bathroom to change clothes (their bedroom actually doesn't have a door at the moment because the hinges stripped out and I haven't got it fixed). I shared a bedroom with a sister and two brothers when I was 10. My brothers were 12 and 5 and my sister was 8, sharing a room didn't bother us. I imagine we also went in the bathroom when we wanted privacy, though I don't specifically remember. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NoseInABook Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 I don't think it would be a big deal. I have three boys sharing a room. When kids spend the night, there's been up to 5 girls in my girls' room that usually sleeps just two. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 Get rid of the little LEGOS until the kids are old enough to use them as models. That was my solution because I cannot stand the noise they make raking through the box or the stepping on random pieces or the fighting over pieces/mini-figures. {Yep, I am totally bringing out the "Kragle" from The LEGO Movie.} I would do 2 and 2 if you have space in your family room for toys. It could also be a good excuse to trim down the toys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fdrinca Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 We're coming up on this decision soon (7yo boy, 5yo girl, 3yo boy, infant), so I understand the dilemma. So much has to do with the personalities of the kids in question, plus your general house dynamics. For us, the oldest two are 15 months apart and have a very close relationship, so that even though they are different genders, they have a strong preference to be together, especially at night. Also, I don't like toys in bedrooms, so we would have to come up with another playroom-type option for our house if we moved to two kid bedrooms. I really like the idea of having a bed room and leaving the rest of the space for living, but again, this comes from our personal experience where we don't use our bedrooms for anything but sleeping. If our family had a culture of retreating to bedrooms for quiet time, etc, then perhaps I'd value two sleeping spaces. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 1 bedroom, but get a bunk bed w/ a double on bottom, and twin on top, then the two middle girls can sleep together, and it takes up less space than a bunk, a reg bed, and a mattress. Then you could still keep some safe bedtime toys in there, like stuffies. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
minuway Posted March 31, 2014 Share Posted March 31, 2014 We have 4 kids ages 9g,7g,5b,3b. My little babies always stay in my room for the first year or so, usually in a pack in play or crib in my room (though in one house we had a huge master closet that became the baby room). But as far as kid rooms, we have never had a dedicated play room - two kids per room and we limit toys / clothes big time. I use the Simplicity Parenting model for inspiration, and it helps a lot. I would still do it this way, even if their ages/genders did not split so nicely. I would just put whoever would together best together. I guess I could see how some mellow, laid back kids could be 4 in a room together, but for my kids, I could not have them all in one room, it would drive them (and then me) nuts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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