s/o Isn't anyone really, really offended by foul language anymore?

[Caroline]

Heavy sigh.....thread has already gone downhill, so I will just add my .02 and let the chips fall where they may.

 

My children have learned every swear word there is from ME, yup, yup, sad but true. I don't swear a lot, but driving in the car is fair game and every now and then something does slip out in front of them.

 

Judge as you will.......

 

 

I don't swear a lot, either, but put me on the Jersey Turnpike and words come out that I didn't realize I knew.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

There are so many things to be offended by in this world. Foul language isn't one I choose to be offended by. I am however offended by racist, sexist and bigoted commentary. My children learned their "bad" words from me. They also know that it is not acceptable to use them in most places so they choose not to use them at all.

 

We spend so much time judging others based on things that really do not matter at the end of the day. All these "standards" we expect people to live up to. No wonder being social is exhausting.

[beaners]

 

I also get annoyed when people pitch a fit over shut up, shut it, shut your mouth ect.. They claim you should say be quiet or some such nonsense. Well you know what? Say be quiet if what you want is for them to say it quietly. But don't say be quiet if the truth is you want them to stop talking, because that means shut up.

 

 

This reminds me. My 4 year old says, "Knock it off!" in a particularly hateful tone. I say it to the dogs sometimes when they get loud, but not with that tone. :blush: She got it from me, but we have been working very hard to stop her from saying it. I'm waiting for it to pop out of her mouth one day while we are in public.

[toawh]

I think it's all in context. When I was a kid I often heard "Damn those children." when things went wrong. Often they weren't our fault and it bugged me. I feel damning something or someone is a very strong thing to say. But when I hear someone say, for instance, that something was so "f***ing good" or even use the the f word or s**t as a way to express frustration, it doesn't bother me. I don't talk like that myself, but that's because it's not part of my identity.

I think the attitude behind things bothers me as oppossed to physical words themselves. Some people say all the "right" words but are nasty inside, and others let it all hang out but I know they'd go half way across the world if I needed help.

[Murphy101]

Ha!

 

I once told my dh that I didn't "have time for this crap" and he had the nerve to poke the irritable bear and reply, "Good heavens! You're about to die and you're biggest worry is whether you have time to potty first?!"

 

*eyeroll*

 

 

 

 

 

This makes me wonder, though, what is the origin of a phrase like "don't give a sh!t" Are there times that you do give a sh!t? And are we supposed to be glad when someone gives a sh!t and disappointed when they don't? Something seems wrong with this picture. :D

 

[I.Dup.]

I do think when someone uses the "F" word for every other word that it absolutely reflects on their class and intelligence level.

 

A well-placed swear word doesn't bother me and I'm not above using them (very occasionally, but moreso now that I am in my last trimester and very grumpy, a few more have been slipping out here and there).

 

I am offended if someone is cussing when I am out with my children somewhere and I would say something (usually it's teenagers).

[Erin]

My children have learned every swear word there is from ME, yup, yup, sad but true.

As mentioned, I rarely cuss, and when the kids were really little, I was always after Trap to watch his language in front of them (not realizing that kids easily figure out what is and isn't appropriate for children vs. adults).

But one day he happened to walk in the door after work, just as I was pulling a pan of cookies out of the over for tomorrow's potluck, burned to a crisp.

"$h!), $h!), $h!)!!"

And the kids, 18months and 3, watching this process carefully were like two little magpies, "$h!), $h!), $h!)!!"

 

Trap absolutely rolled. They'd never copied him, even after countless times watching Daddy cussing a blue streak at rank, old, range cows, but they copied me over cookies. :001_rolleyes:

He has gotten untold mileage out of that story.

[nmoira]

This thread reminded me of a profanity laden comedy sketch I saw years ago: David Mamet and Lindsay Crouse at the breakfast table (90% sure it was breakfast). But I can't remember where I saw it. SNL? Mad TV? No idea. It was f***ing hilarious though.

 

ETA: Maybe it wasn't even a skit. Perhaps a comedian spinning the bit so vividly I pictured it? It's driving me crazy.

[Orthodox6]

(see insertions)

 

I think 'spew' is a very ugly word that many people here have used, some of whom would never utter an expletive. It is meant to be derogatroy.

A derogatory word? Spew? That is a new usage, for sure. Volcanoes have been spewing for centuries.

 

 

What is the difference between that and a forbidden word?

 

 

I also think the claim that the use of foul language shows a lack of imagination or limited vocabulary is a tired cliche, and betrays the same faults it claims to uncover.

Disagree completely. Since the concept of "self-control" is unpopular around here, I'll substitute "self-governance".

 

[Freckles]

I hate hearing people curse. Curse in your home, car, or shower, but please refrain from saying f.... every other word while I'm trying to eat my meal at a restaurant or trying to watch a movie with my family at the theater. I will ask you to please have some manners around others.

[Wabi Sabi]

Is this thread a complete clustercuss yet? ;-)

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJP31ZiUgeM

[nmoira]

Is this thread a complete clustercuss yet? ;-)

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jJP31ZiUgeM

 

Are you cussing with me?

[BarbecueMom]

I was reminded of this thread again while watching Broadchurch. I could listen to David Tennant say "horses***" in his Scottish accent all. day. long.

 

That is all.

[ktgrok]

hmm..I have conflicting thoughts on it.

 

I think what it comes down to is I was raised, rightly or wrongly, to believe that how you speak and conduct yourself in front of someone conveys how much you respect that person. So to swear/cuss in front of someone would show a lack of respect for them in some way. Hence the idea of not swearing in front of a lady, your parents, your boss, etc. However, doing it amongst others of the same social status that are also doing it would be ok. Kind of like I would use a knife and fork at a business meeting, unless everyone else was using their fingers too, in which case it would not be rude for ME to use my fingers.

 

So I prefer people i do not know well to avoid swearing in front of me, as it feels demeaning. (if they apologize for doing so than I am NOT offended...the apology conveys the same feeling as if they didn't swear). But close girl friends that I have a relationship with? Doesn't bug me. Movies, doesn't bother me.

 

Make any sense? (and I STILL don't swear in front of my parents!)

[poppy]

I think 'spew' is a very ugly word that many people here have used, some of whom would never utter an expletive. It is meant to be derogatroy.

A derogatory word? Spew? That is a new usage, for sure. Volcanoes have been spewing for centuries.

 

 

Do you think the posters here were comparing people who "spew" foul language to volcanoes? I think they were using a derogatory synonym for "speak".

 

What is the difference between that and a forbidden word?

 

 

I also think the claim that the use of foul language shows a lack of imagination or limited vocabulary is a tired cliche, and betrays the same faults it claims to uncover.

Disagree completely. Since the concept of "self-control" is unpopular around here, I'll substitute "self-governance".

 

You think juding people to be unintelligent and unimaginative due to language choices show self control? The words I'd use are lazy, judgemental, smug.

[TracyP]

I think 'spew' is a very ugly word that many people here have used, some of whom would never utter an expletive. It is meant to be derogatroy.

 

 

Ugh, since I used spew, I'll bite. I did not use spew to be derogatory. I did a quick search to make sure I wasn't missing something and the definition is: to expel large quantities of something forcibly which was exactly how I used it in my example. Yes, something like a volcano of F bombs. I also said that I had no problem with swearing so, no, I don't have a problem using the word spew. And I really shouldn't bite because these conversations become nonsensical when they reach this point, but I'm bored today.

[QuirkyKapers]

Heh. When we were reading fairy tales, DS3 kept asking me to reread "P*ssy Boots" instead of "Puss in Boots". I wonder if that's the kind of shoe used in that c-word activity in the sorority girl's letter.

 

 

This brings back a memory. I was at an art museum. My two kids and another child were sitting at this table doing a craft. The craft was making a construction paper cat. In the room were college age students and other adults in addition to this elementary homeschool group of children. This boy starts saying to me, "Come look at my pu$$y. Isn't this such a nice pu$$y?". "That is what I am naming my cat, pu$$y. "Seriously, I am sure I turned bright red since everyone. could. hear. This child was not using his indoor voice. As I am turning bright red, I really am also trying hard not to laugh. I just had to give myself a pep talk in my head that only the older people in the room would actually know that word wasn't acceptable. I also kept thinking, please teacher, move on to the next activity. However, when my child starting saying the same thing, I did go over and tell him to call it a kitty kat, quietly in his ear. Later, when my child asked, I told him that some words have more than one way of being used and sometimes it isn't used in a nice way. Ah...good times...good times...

[Luanne]

"I also think the claim that the use of foul language shows a lack of imagination or limited vocabulary is a tired cliche, and betrays the same faults it claims to uncover."

 

I totally disagree as well. I also find it interesting how many of you are posting things that include cussing ... just to annoy the OP, I guess. I can't see any other reason for it.

[nmoira]

"I also think the claim that the use of foul language shows a lack of imagination or limited vocabulary is a tired cliche, and betrays the same faults it claims to uncover."

 

I totally disagree as well. I also find it interesting how many of you are posting things that include cussing ... just to annoy the OP, I guess. I can't see any other reason for it.

 

Perhaps that's due to lack of imagination.

[AnIslandGirl]

I'm not sure if anyone let their children watch "Arthur", but if so, there was an amazing swear word show. There was the lovely beep anytime a character would swear and the parents reaction was always extreme (drop a vase, etc.). They eventually said that swear words were meant to say, "I don't like you and were intended to hurt the recipients feelings." or something to that nature.

The only problem was that toward the very end, you could clearly read the characters lips, and the animators made sure that the viewers who knew the words, knew exactly what was implied.

The adults in the room were doubled over laughing.

[Caroline]

"I also think the claim that the use of foul language shows a lack of imagination or limited vocabulary is a tired cliche, and betrays the same faults it claims to uncover."

 

I totally disagree as well. I also find it interesting how many of you are posting things that include cussing ... just to annoy the OP, I guess. I can't see any other reason for it.

 

Limited vocabulary and lack of self control, obviously. (That is sarcasm. I have been known to cuss a blue streak from time to time...)

[delaney]

The word "panties" is much creepier in my book. Something only a pedophile would reference. Ick....but that's my opinion

[Retired]

a curse word doesn't bother me but taking the Lords name in vein does or race words.

 

I got spanked for saying darn, dern or crap. My dad thought those were curse words. I think for me being raised with such strick views on behavior I'm all for letting folks speak their mind

 

My SIL and BIL want allow their kids around our heathern chrisitan home LOL I use crap and freak a little to often. They are upset with my words yet their children say oh-my-god all the time. I can't stand to hear it said in that way. I mean if you are a believer and its a prayer but most don't use it prayerfully . As a chrisitan I love Jesus and try to live right and treat others right. The bible discusses taming the tongue. I would rather hear a curse word than what most women do and that is to gossip and slanders others. I've seen this at church too much. But yes my tongue does let a few curse words and I feel bad about it but its just one of my many sins that I continue to work on and seek Gods grace when I fall

[Mrs Mungo]

The whole tone of the OP is to assume being vulgar or cursing or slang are new things. They are not new. They have always been around. They are not going anywhere. I don't like excessive cursing in public or around kids. And there are words I do not say. But, both of my grandmas cursed (one only rarely, one a lot). I don't see it as a hill to die on.

 

Eta: really, the person who posted the quote from Ephesians illustrates my point beautifully.

 

Ed again to add: we are all snobby over something. See my sig. ;)

[Luanne]

Perhaps that's due to lack of imagination.

 

Lack of imagination on who's part? mine or the other people's?

[nmoira]

 

 

Lack of imagination on who's part? mine or the other people's?

 

Yours. You said you couldn't "see any other reason for it."

[Luanne]

I think the people with no imagination are the ones who only know how to use foul language to get any kind of point across.

[Erin]

The word "panties" is much creepier in my book. Something only a pedophile would reference. Ick....but that's my opinion

I thought it was just me! lol I HATE the word panties.

We use undies, underwear or drawers at my house.

[LucyStoner]

I think the people with no imagination are the ones who only know how to use foul language to get any kind of point across.

 

 

Plenty of people who know how to get every kind of point across, with or without swear words, also swear from time to time.

[nmoira]

I think the people with no imagination are the ones who only know how to use foul language to get any kind of point across.

 

 

Which is not the point I was responding to. :)

[Mrs Mungo]

 

 

Plenty of people who know how to get every kind of point across, with or without swear words, also swear from time to time.

 

 

And the inverse is also true. Plenty of people who do not curse are unimaginative, unintelligent and could not get a point across to save their lives. So, I agree that cursing or lack thereof have little to do with any of these things.

[Aslana]

Again, trust me, my swearing is the least of your worries if you think I lack imagination. If you wish me to prove this to you, please allow me to open the door to my brain, whence you will take the Elevator to Nowhere Imagination St. and be given the ride of your life.

 

I do not cuss because I lack imagination. That much I can assure you.

[AlmiraGulch]

Oh, man. This just reminded me, of Cracked's "The 9 most Devastating Insults." I won't link it here, but for anyone with curiosity, a sense of humor, and little fear of profanity, this is just amazing/fascinating/crackers. (I'm not going to link it here, for obvious reasons.)

 

 

Of course I had to Google it. Man, are some of those just foul! Hilarious, but bad bad bad! They make our curse words seem so very mundane.

[LucyStoner]

I swear because it fits my culture. I don't swear all the time or a lot in front of my kids (or all all in front of other people's kids) or where it is not appropriate but I do swear. I am not ashamed. Partly it helps me connect to different people. Partly, I like taking the toxicity out of certain words. Partly there are times when a swear word is the most accurate word I could use. People don't have to like me, but they can't with a straight face call me unread, uneducated, verbally unpersuasive or lacking in vocabulary.

 

For some reason, many people usually think I don't swear. I worked with someone (in a swear prone workplace) for nearly 2 years and they remarked "wow, you swore, (this org) must really be sinking in!" I was like, "um, hi, my name is Katie and have we even met?" I probably had sworn in front of them more than weekly the whole time I worked there. I have a college friend with the same impression of me (and she's known me since college, 15 years ago) and I was just tickled when she acted surprised that I was swearing about something. Around friends, with my husband (no, not at my husband) and when listening to the news, I swear quite.a.bit.

[nmoira]

Swearing properly takes great imagination and creativity. It's not just a matter of running all the permutations and combinations. You have to take both sound and rhythm into account... and then there's timing. [The words need not be all officially designated profanity.] It's an art not all master. :p

[Mrs Mungo]

Swearing properly takes great imagination and creativity. It's not just a matter of running all the permutations and combinations. You have to take both sound and rhythm into account... and then there's timing., [The words need not be all officially designated profanity.] It's an art not all master. :p

 

 

When I get stuck on a video game level my kids think I sound like Yosemite Sam. It is cursing without real words. :)

[Joanne]

(see insertions)

Disagree completely. Since the concept of "self-control" is unpopular around here, I'll substitute "self-governance".

 

 

 

 

 

Around here in this thread? Around here where you live? Around here among (mostly) homeschoolers? Around here at TWTM Chat board?

 

In any case, disagree completely. I see evidence of and support of self-control around here constantly.

 

I do, however, observe variance on what people believe necessitates self-control.

[HS Mom in NC]

There are internal reactions and external reactions to foul language.

 

Internally, I react to people who use foul language (except in cases of serious emotional trauma or physical trauma) very negatively. I think of them as unintelligent, inarticulate and socially incompetent. It's simply not articulate, smart or socially skilled to use profanity in public. If people have more articulate ways of expressing their annoyances and frustrations but they choose not to-I read it as a sign of not being very smart. If they're using it in public when young child (natural born mimics) could possibly hear it, I consider it as socially inept as other topics strangers should not introduce to young children, like say, human reproduction. Most would agree that human reproduction is a great thing, but few would think of introducing it to other people's children who may be nearby. How much more so a debatable topic like profanity.

 

Externally, I have never felt like running away just because someone is offensive. That would be giving them influence over me. If I had children around that could hear it, I simply calmly explain to them that the words being used were rude and obnoxious, so the child knows it's not acceptable to use them. If they were in that young toddler stage where they hear a word and repeat it over and over with no way of understanding that some words are appropriate and others aren't, I would calmly walk away from the obnoxious person far enough to be out of ear shot.

[Luanne]

Plenty of people who know how to get every kind of point across, with or without swear words, also swear from time to time.

 

 

 

From time to time is one thing. People who do it repetitively are the ones I am talking about.

[Soror]

I curse from time to time but avoid the "big ones". I don't like to hear those who curse every other word as in *my bubble* those who do so are lacking in civility (dh's co-workers for example who are very colorful with their language and extremely rude). I try to avoid such things in front of the kids as there are certain words I don't want to hear out of my 3 yo mouth. I don't think cussing is new but I also don't think the idea that some words are considered more or less acceptable for public is new either.

[fraidycat]

I knew that someone would make this comparison. In fact, there's a HUGE difference. For one, your children will not be taken away due to saying one too many cuss words. If you give them alcohol, they will. Also, if they cuss, it will not have a negative effect on their health, nor will they become drunk. Cussing and alcohol consumption are very different things.

 

 

I was not comparing alcohol and cuss words and which is better or worse, nor involving the law and CPS. I was saying that kids are KIDS and therefore are not afforded every "benefit" that an adult may partake in.

 

Staying up as late as I want.

Eating chocolate at bedtime or for breakfast.

Watching R rated movies.

 

I could go on and on. Adults are adults. Kids are kids. I don't know about you, but my kids don't get to do all of the above. Me? I can if I want to. This also includes cursing.

[zoobie]

The word "panties" is much creepier in my book. Something only a pedophile would reference. Ick....but that's my opinion

 

 

Yes! The words "panties" and "flesh" make my skin crawl.

[nmoira]

Eating chocolate at bedtime

 

You've left me sputtering at the thought. I think I just figure out what I've been doing wrong my entire life. Thank you.

[*Lulu*]

 

 

Yes! The words "panties" and "flesh" make my skin crawl.

 

 

So if someone says "flesh colored panties" do you shudder?

[*Lulu*]

 

 

You've left me sputtering at the thought. I think I just figure out what I've been doing wrong my entire life. Thank you.

 

 

Have you been having your nighttime wine without the chocolate?

 

I believe it is a common mistake.

 

Equally common is the mistake that milk chocolate and dark chocolate are interchangeable.

[nmoira]

Equally common is the mistake that milk chocolate and dark chocolate are interchangeable.

 

 

Blasphemy!

[happymomofboys]

I'm offended when someone curses and swears at someone or in the presence of children. However, casual swears and cursing in entertainment or between a group of adults doesn't offend me. There is a point where I can't take anymore and I tend to avoid people who use it too much, but I'm not offended. It's just unpleasant to hear. I don't enjoy most stand-up comedy for this reason. I have been known to let loose a swear word in anger, but I'm not someone who swears often or casually.

[Mrs Mungo]

So, we were at this BBQ at the home of some friends. Everyone there had kids and the kids were all present. However, most of the people there had little kids who were around 5 and under. Our eldest was 14 at the time. One of the dads is telling a funny story, but spelling all of the bad words. Finally, one of the moms said, "you know that the Mungo kids can spell, right?" The look on his face was *priceless*!!!

[fraidycat]

So, we were at this BBQ at the home of some friends. Everyone there had kids and the kids were all present. However, most of the people there had little kids who were around 5 and under. Our eldest was 14 at the time. One of the dads is telling a funny story, but spelling all of the bad words. Finally, one of the moms said, "you know that the Mungo kids can spell, right?" The look on his face was *priceless*!!!

 

 

I'm sad that our spelling out days are over when we're trying to converse around children, especially when it's close to birthdays, Christmas, etc.

 

Our old dog could spell, too. He figured out walk, so we spelled it. We eventually had to start speaking pig latin for our after supper plans about when that particular event would happen.

[zoobie]

 

 

So if someone says "flesh colored panties" do you shudder?

 

 

Shudder and involuntarily spew expletives.