Tidbits of Learning Posted August 7, 2012 Share Posted August 7, 2012 (edited) I was recently pushed to invite a child to my dd's b-day party b/c I did not realize when you made a fb event that it shows up on walls and not just to your invites. I am friends with a mom and for a while my dd11 really got on well with her dd. My girls are growing into the tween stage. Her dd is 9 and my dd's are 11 and 12. All the kids at the party will be 12-14 yr old girls and boys. She put me on the spot and I know this kid is going to annoy my kids and their friends. I tried to tell her that the only 9 year olds that will be there are my son and two of the guests younger siblings (they will hang with my son). This child is actually a few months younger than my ds9. Neither of my dd's wanted to invite her. The mom and I are friends. We talk a lot. I have tried to encourage her dd to make a friendship with my son. She wants to be friends with the big girls. I am going to be blunt. I tried to explain the situation and she just seemed to not realize that when I was saying it was only big kids that I wasn't meaning her young sons, but I meant her dd. This is going to be a boy/girl party except for a few siblings who will probably hang out together. It is glow in the dark golf with laser tag. There will be music. I am not going to be making rounds and checking on anyone. The kids will arrive and play mini-golf and get arcade tokens, we will serve cake and ice cream, and then they will all go in a separate room for laser tag. She wants to drop her dd off even though I told her the guest list was several 13 and 14 yr old boys. My dd that used to get on with her dd now is bff's with a 13 yr old girl. My dd also has a big crush on one of the 12 yr old boys coming. My dd now sees this child as being younger than her little brother. My dd has put away her dolls and toys. My friend seemed to only hear what she thought I was saying about younger siblings and little kids besides my son and a few of his friends. This child shuns my son and will not be steered to play mini-golf with the other 9 year olds. My friend put me on the spot and was all her dd thinks my dd is her friend and really likes my dd. I feel bad b/c I wasn't more blunt in the phone call and didn't just say that my dd has outgrown the friendship. This is basically going to be what I would have called a jr. high party where the adults hang out at the tables and the kids have fun. I am going to make sure there is no funny business in the dark, but it is not going to be a kiddy party. She wants to drop her dd off. I am imagining this kid getting her feelings hurt by big kids and crying in a corner and I won't even realize it b/c it is going to be 15 or so jr. high kids, 3 4th graders (my son and siblings of 2 of the 13 yr old boys-they are friends of my son and will keep him from bugging his sisters), and my 5 yr old (dh will keep him busy golfing. Would you try to have another talk with this friend and again tell her it is all jr. high kids except younger siblings. If her dd would play with the 4th graders, it would be fine. I just picture her dd shunning the kids her age and making my girls really hate her. This is going to wreck my friendship with the mom. This kid is going to have a miserable time. It is going to be a fiasco. What would you do at this point? The b-day party is 3 weekends away. Update in post 26. New Update in post 50. Final update post 82. Edited August 8, 2012 by OpenMinded Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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