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You know those Christmas letters we were talking about?


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Well *I* just got one from JESUS! :D

 

Yup, signed "Your Friend, Jesus."

 

Last spring I was contacted by a cousin, several times removed, who was doing research on her family tree. I never knew she existed, she never knew I existed. She emailed me info from my mom's side of the family tree, all was legit, mom remembered that there was a cousin named "Linda" way back when, who turns out to be the aunt of this person. So I helped her fill in the blanks on our little "branch" and offered to mail her some copies of old family photos she had asked about, which I did. She lives in Virginia, I live in CT, and I don't know of any other family in the south. I don't even know any of her immediate or extended family.

 

So today I get a Christmas card from her. It took me a minute to figure out who it was from, actually. Inside was a typed Christmas letter, which I thought at first was from her, detailing her family's year.

 

Nope. It was from Jesus. It began, "Dear Astrid," and contained phrases such as, "...you've let me down and hurt me so many times, but still I love you," and "I won't hassle you any further. You are free to choose me. It is your decision...... Your Friend, Jesus."

 

Now, this woman knows very little about me. She has no idea whether I"m Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Jewish, atheist, agnostic, or even more fundamental evangelical Christian that she is.

 

I appreciate her passion and her fervor, but this whole letter REALLY. TURNED. ME. OFF. I would have much rather read brags about her kids (I don't even know if she has any) or her job (she could be retired?) or her many vacations (don't know if she took any?)

 

If any of you send similar letters, here's an opinion from one unwitting recipient: Proselytizing via a guilt-trip Christmas letter from Jesus is just not effective, IMHO. YMMV.

 

 

Rant over, flame suit on.

 

astrid

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Well, that's kind of what I thought. I was extremely offended, but since I don't really know this person, I kind of let it roll off my back. And I'm certainly no expert, but the speaking-for-Jesus part seemed rather inappropriate, I thought. :blink:

 

astrid

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You could always reply with something like:

 

Dear Linda,

Wow, I think it is SO cool that Jesus uses you as his personal transcriptionist! Who knew that his relationship with you was THAT personal! Still, it must be pretty neat to take dictation from the divine. I wish I could have heard more about what else you do in your free time, though, and what your family has been up to, so, please, next year fill me in on the other things going on in your life! Anyway, it was good hearing from you, and I hope that you and yours have a Merry Christmas! Thank you for the card!

Sincerely,

Astrid.

 

Maybe...? :lol:

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Well now I really am curious as to whether it's something that's done in fundamental, evangelical circles. Not that I know whether this woman is one or not, heck, I don't know anything about her other than her name, her buttonhole relation to me, and the fact that she lives in VA.

 

Maybe there's some church or denomination that encourages this? I've certainly never seen it before, but I don't tend to run in those circles...

 

astrid

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Well now I really am curious as to whether it's something that's done in fundamental, evangelical circles. Not that I know whether this woman is one or not, heck, I don't know anything about her other than her name, her buttonhole relation to me, and the fact that she lives in VA.

 

Maybe there's some church or denomination that encourages this? I've certainly never seen it before, but I don't tend to run in those circles...

 

My guess is no.

 

As a Christian, I find that letter extremely presumptive and downright WEIRD.

:grouphug: Sorry you had to get such a letter!!

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Well now I really am curious as to whether it's something that's done in fundamental, evangelical circles. Not that I know whether this woman is one or not, heck, I don't know anything about her other than her name, her buttonhole relation to me, and the fact that she lives in VA.

 

Maybe there's some church or denomination that encourages this? I've certainly never seen it before, but I don't tend to run in those circles...

 

astrid

 

 

Noooo, I really think not. I have a feeling this lady may be sitting back patting herself on the back over her great idea for her Christmas letter this year. AND how many people its going to save. She may even have a tear in her eye.

 

Ok, that was mean, I take it back!!

 

:D

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Well now I really am curious as to whether it's something that's done in fundamental, evangelical circles. Not that I know whether this woman is one or not, heck, I don't know anything about her other than her name, her buttonhole relation to me, and the fact that she lives in VA.

 

Maybe there's some church or denomination that encourages this? I've certainly never seen it before, but I don't tend to run in those circles...

 

astrid

 

I'm a pretty conservative Christian and I have never in my life heard of anything like this. Wow! I don't blame you for being offended. I'm pretty offended that she's speaking for Jesus in such a way!

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Although it obviously was not the sender's intended response, I find the whole thing hilarious. It will make for a funny family story now and years down the road. Not only is Santa keeping tabs on you, but Jesus too. Hmmm...Astrid, is there something you need to get off your conscience? :lol:

 

Maybe you should get an Elf on the Shelf and make it an Astrid-Watching trifecta. :D

 

 

OMG!!! :smilielol5::cheers2::rofl::smilielol5:

 

astrid

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It's not too late to send her a Christmas letter of your own.

 

Do you have any favorite Ancient Egyptian or Greek gods and goddesses you want to take dictation for, Astrid...?

 

:iagree: Something along the lines of:

 

Dear [relative],

 

Hope you have a Merry Christmas. See you soon!

 

-Osiris

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Noooo, I really think not. I have a feeling this lady may be sitting back patting herself on the back over her great idea for her Christmas letter this year. AND how many people its going to save. She may even have a tear in her eye.

 

Ok, that was mean, I take it back!!

 

:D

 

LOL! NO, that's exactly what we've been envisioning here. Bless her heart. :tongue_smilie:

astrid

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Wouldn't it be funny if she got a bunch of mail addressed to Jesus? One from you channeling Satan, one from Mergath's Osiris saying "hey bro! long time no see!", maybe another saying that he violated the Olympic Convention Protocol of 1429 in writing directly to any human and informing him of the sanctions... this could be a fun group project. I'm game!

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Wouldn't it be funny if she got a bunch of mail addressed to Jesus? One from you channeling Satan, one from Mergath's Osiris saying "hey bro! long time no see!", maybe another saying that he violated the Olympic Convention Protocol of 1429 in writing directly to any human and informing him of the sanctions... this could be a fun group project. I'm game!

 

I like that. :D

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Wow, so even JESUS isn't safe from identity theft? Who knew?!!!

 

Send the letter to one of those identity theft protection places and they can do a commercial! ;)

 

I can't imagine shoving this sort of stuff down someone's throat. I take Jesus pretty seriously, and I can't imagine impersonating him, or subjecting someone else to it. It's weird.

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WOW!!!:001_huh:

 

Not only would I find that extremely offensive but, as a Christian, I would never dare to pretend to speak for Jesus. Sacrilege!

 

I'm sorry you got a letter like that.:grouphug:

:iagree:

Wow, so even JESUS isn't safe from identity theft? Who knew?!!!

 

Send the letter to one of those identity theft protection places and they can do a commercial! ;)

 

I can't imagine shoving this sort of stuff down someone's throat. I take Jesus pretty seriously, and I can't imagine impersonating him, or subjecting someone else to it. It's weird.

:lol:

And with the comments about someone speaking for Jesus, I'm now picturing the stereotypical cat lady w/a Jesus handpuppet, doing a really bad puppet act...

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I've got an aunt who forwards emails like this all the time. I used to try to read some, but it got too annoying so now I just delete them. I wonder if your cousin just printed an email forward she found inspiring? Or maybe your cousin is the source of the annoying forwards and now I've got someone to shake my virtual fist at?

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WOW!!!:001_huh:

 

Not only would I find that extremely offensive but, as a Christian, I would never dare to pretend to speak for Jesus. Sacrilege!

 

I'm sorry you got a letter like that.:grouphug:

 

:iagree:

 

You could always reply with something like:

 

Dear Linda,

Wow, I think it is SO cool that Jesus uses you as his personal transcriptionist! Who knew that his relationship with you was THAT personal! Still, it must be pretty neat to take dictation from the divine. I wish I could have heard more about what else you do in your free time, though, and what your family has been up to, so, please, next year fill me in on the other things going on in your life! Anyway, it was good hearing from you, and I hope that you and yours have a Merry Christmas! Thank you for the card!

Sincerely,

Astrid.

 

Maybe...? :lol:

 

:D :D :D

 

I would write one back from Satan. If she's a believer it'll scare the bejeebus out of her! She might have to hire a priest!

 

Do we have a picture of a Santanist and his sleigh? :tongue_smilie:

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That could be! Maybe she IS hiding under a rock, fiendishly forwarding all manner of annoying crap! (After all, doesn't everyone have at least one annoying relative? Maybe she's mine?)

 

I have to confess-- we've spent all afternoon and evening envisioning all sorts of hysterical scenarios and replies. I daresay it's the best gift we'll get all year! :lol:

 

astrid (I am wicked. I am very wicked. My cousin must have sensed it!)

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