wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 ... and she has been crying ever since :001_huh: :001_unsure: :confused1: :crying: Every.single.thing I say to her makes her cry. I said "Sierra, did you get enough dinner?" And she went running into her room crying :confused: She is going to be 13 in 2 months so shes not to young for this.. My question?? How long do the tears last??? :001_huh: :confused: :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
specialmama Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 UGH! No words of wisdom here. I'm dreading the day. Just lots of hugs. :grouphug: And chocolate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farmgirlinwv Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I'm assuming your referring to the beginning of her menstrual cycle. My dd started @ 12yo. She didn't cry. There's really nothing to cry about. We made it into a positive thing (which it is). We talked about it. We went out to eat. We did her nails and bought some manicaure stuff. I linked it to her growing up and what a positive thing that is. She has fond memories of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I was told that it could last several years :( We've been dealing with this. DD started a little over a year ago, quit for a bit, started up in the summer again. The past few months have been tears off and on. It doesn't matter when during her cycle. I was told it's more of a puberty thing than a cycle thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 There's really nothing to cry about. She's crying because of the hormones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted January 17, 2011 Author Share Posted January 17, 2011 She's crying because of the hormones. Exactly... and I just want to hug her but everything has been turning her to tears. I asked her why and she started crying and said "I dont know." <Sigh>... Poor kid :confused: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 She's crying because of the hormones. :iagree: My DD is 11, and I'm kind of dreading it. I hope she doesn't take after me. I have had horrible cycles since my very first one. DD is aware of some of the difficulties I deal with every month, which may affect how she responds to starting herself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Exactly... and I just want to hug her but everything has been turning her to tears. I asked her why and she started crying and said "I dont know." <Sigh>... Poor kid :confused: My daughter bounces between "I don't know" and "I'm hormonal". It seems like quite a few girls she goes to Sunday School with are dealing with it also, because if one breaks out crying for no reason and is asked, "I'm just hormonal right now" is the common response. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abigail4476 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I'm assuming your referring to the beginning of her menstrual cycle. My dd started @ 12yo. She didn't cry. There's really nothing to cry about. We made it into a positive thing (which it is). We talked about it. We went out to eat. We did her nails and bought some manicaure stuff. I linked it to her growing up and what a positive thing that is. She has fond memories of it. :iagree: Both of our girls' announcements were met with smiles, hugs, and happy tears. (I cry over every milestone; I can't help myself.) It's part of becoming a woman, and there's nothing to fear. Pragmatism, a shopping trip to buy all the necessary items (including a cute little holder for purse supplies), and a positive outlook have gotten us through both of ours with zero tears, not counting mine. My dd13 does get a bit moody prior to her cycle starting, but I don't allow her to use that as an excuse to be nasty to her family; you take an ibuprofen if necessary, and go on with life. :) I do allow them extra time to rest and maybe even time for a nap each afternoon if they need it. I also keep a Google calendar for my husband so he can keep track of three cycles and know who might be feeling a little stressed or sensitive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 You all probably all think chiropractics is my answer to everything, but it does help regulate hormones and does wonders towards diminishing period pain. More expensive than drugs, but better for our bodies. Rosie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5LittleMonkeys Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I think it depends on the dc too. My oldest is not normally very emotional...very even keeled all the time...very logical and analytical. She never gets weepy. In fact the only way I know its her time is because she will ask me to go buy her supplies. Now, my other one is a very emotional child. Her emotions rule her world...very tender hearted...doesn't like change. She gets super hormonal. I usually just try to act like it is a non-issue because the more I try to baby her and make a fuss the worse she gets. If she starts crying (for no apparent reason) in front of me I will usually tell her that I'm sorry she is having a hard time and suggest she retire to her room for a while until she regains composer. If everyone just leaves her alone she usually starts acting a bit better. I suspect she will always get over-emotional during this time. Hot baths and herbal tea may help. :grouphug: to both of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted January 17, 2011 Author Share Posted January 17, 2011 You all probably all think chiropractics is my answer to everything, but it does help regulate hormones and does wonders towards diminishing period pain. More expensive than drugs, but better for our bodies. Rosie Really? I am very nervous about her cramping. I had such horrible cramping until I got pregnant with her (my first) That is good to know. Dh loves the chiropractor but I would not have thought of that for this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KidsHappen Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 All of my girls started at 11 and were pretty moody until about midway through their 14 year. Things start improving then and I would say that they are just like any other woman in this respect by the time they are 15. I really like the idea about a calendar for hubby. My girls cycle in sequence: the 19 year old, the 17 year old, the 14 year old and then the 11 year old. I am menopausal so my period comes anywhere from 8 to 12 weeks and my oldest is still nursing and doesn't have regular cycles again yet. So someone is always moody around here. At least we don't all have them at the same time. That would be enough to drive anyone crazy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peela Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I dont think there is a problem with crying. I think we probably dont cry enough (well, some people do but most of us bottle it up too much). It might just be that the hormones are helping to release some emotional stuff...I wouldn't make too much of a big deal out of it. Just give her hugs and keep the communication channels open, and be matter of fact about the whole thing. It's ok to cry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LidiyaDawn Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I also keep a Google calendar for my husband so he can keep track of three cycles and know who might be feeling a little stressed or sensitive. My dh would be completely freaked out if I offered him something like this :laugh: re: crying - my dd14 doesn't really get much of that, but she sure gets the moody fly-off-the-handle stuff. I never really did with my 'time', but I do now (pregnant) and having felt that myself I don't really give her a hard time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margo out of lurking Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Really? I am very nervous about her cramping. I had such horrible cramping until I got pregnant with her (my first) I had the same concerns about my dd, as I had horribly heavy periods and cramping. Back in my day (oh my gosh, I am soooooo old), you could only get ibuprofen by prescription, which was just one more giant headache on top of my monster periods. Thankfully, her body was much more normal, and she's had none of the problems I had. Different person, different body. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nd293 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 UGH! No words of wisdom here. I'm dreading the day. Just lots of hugs. :grouphug: And chocolate. Chocolate has always been the way I dealt with hormone-induced mood swings, so I'd buy a big slab and share it with her! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dm379 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 According to dh, they last forever! I still get that way one day a month. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Poor dear. Maybe instead of asking her why she's crying, next time commiserate with her, "Those hormones are tough to deal with aren't they. Should we go get some chocolate or ice cream?" Of course, that could send her crying too! As far as how long it lasts, there is no telling. My eldest has a doctor's appt tomorrow because she is still having such difficulties with hers. Her life comes to a half for a week out of every month. It is way beyond just crying. I haven't done anything about it yet, because I didn't want such a young girl on birth control (which is going to be the suggestion). However, with her heading to college this fall, she is not going to be able to be sick that often. Dd16a gets irritable and a little cryish. She cried very easily for about a year. Dd16b just gets a little cranky. I normally don't even notice. I have found that chocolate does help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LisaKinVA Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Exactly... and I just want to hug her but everything has been turning her to tears. I asked her why and she started crying and said "I dont know." <Sigh>... Poor kid :confused: My dd has been doing this *forever* (like since birth), we recently had an episode of her just "needing" to cry (she's almost 9). I did pretty good (I'm not a crier, not hyper-emotional, never went through the cry-for-no-reason as a young teen... so I am REALLY dreading when pony-girl hits that stage. No buds yet :D I'm hoping she takes after me for onset of her cycle!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gratia271 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I also keep a Google calendar for my husband so he can keep track of three cycles and know who might be feeling a little stressed or sensitive. My husband doesn't need one. :001_huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gratia271 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 ... and she has been crying ever since Every.single.thing I say to her makes her cry. I said "Sierra, did you get enough dinner?" And she went running into her room crying :confused: She is going to be 13 in 2 months so shes not to young for this.. My question?? How long do the tears last??? :grouphug: Not there yet but my ordinarily stoic daughter has become more emotional/dramatic, so I am guessing it is right around the corner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swirl Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 My family still tells the story at family gatherings of how I just wept uncontrollably when my mom told me that I had to start wearing deodorant. For some reason, they all get a real kick out of telling it. :glare: I have no idea why I reacted that way??? As an adult, I am no longer that sensative. I rarely cry at anything. It's probably just hormones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 For me, when I was hormonal, I preferred to be alone as much as possible. It was just best for everyone. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiCO Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Exactly... and I just want to hug her but everything has been turning her to tears. I asked her why and she started crying and said "I dont know." I did this, too. It was horrible! But it only lasted a few months (and it was over a year before I actually started my period.) And it returned when I was pregnant with my first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I'd cry too, if I knew I had 30-40 yrs. of PMS ahead of me! :D Just kidding. I'm sorry your daughter is upset and I hope she is back to normal soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldberry Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 My dd has been doing this *forever* (like since birth), we recently had an episode of her just "needing" to cry (she's almost 9). I did pretty good (I'm not a crier, not hyper-emotional, never went through the cry-for-no-reason as a young teen... so I am REALLY dreading when pony-girl hits that stage. No buds yet :D I'm hoping she takes after me for onset of her cycle!) This is my DD as well - since birth! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
torikei Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 My daughter just became a lady. We were at Disneyworld on 1/11/11. I felt so bad because I started laughing. We were in the Magical Kingdom and my offbeat sense of humor found it amusing. Luckily my wonderful dd found it amusing too. Grandma and her cousin tried to extend sympathy but that just made us laugh harder. I do worry though because she had cramps for 3 days before. We thought it was stomach flu--dumb old mom ;). On a serious note, my dd seems much more comfortable with the whole process than I ever was. I was a crier and pretty much thought it was the end of the world. Tori Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenNC Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 On a serious note, my dd seems much more comfortable with the whole process than I ever was. I was a crier and pretty much thought it was the end of the world. Tori I was pleased my 10 1/2 yo was much the same (she actually started later than I did, I was 9). I've been told by many moms that it was very difficult for their daughters--anything to deal with growing up, really--bras, deodorant, periods. She started while we were out just before Christmas. She came bouncing back from the bathroom at the store and whispered conspiratorially, "I've got some blood on my panties. Growing up in your face, ha, ha, ha!" and grinned. Knowing things could happen any time, I had asked her several months ago if she wanted to have a pad to keep in her purse or bag just in case (she did), so we were good with that and went about our shopping. A bit ironically, I had at one time thought of linking getting her ears pierced to starting her period, a rite of passage thing, but had decided that would probably make too big a deal out of it (we're also not the "gather the women together for a you've-got-your-period party" type, a suggestion I've seen offered). So, when some of her friends got pierced ears a couple of years ago, I offered to get hers done whenever she wanted. She hadn't wanted to until I got mine re-pierced last week for my birthday. We had hers done this weekend, so things kind of worked out as I had envisioned. My husband also had one ear done in solidarity:). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Mine were so okay with they just about forgot to tell me. No help here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
torikei Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 She came bouncing back from the bathroom at the store and whispered conspiratorially, "I've got some blood on my panties. Growing up in your face, ha, ha, ha!" and grinned. Knowing things could happen any time, I had asked her several months ago if she wanted to have a pad to keep in her purse or bag just in case (she did), so we were good with that and went about our shopping. What a great attitude! Tori Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I have to admit that I'm surprised whenever I see these threads, because I had never heard of it being such a big deal or a "special event" for anyone I knew. I had no idea that some moms made it into some sort of celebration or as an initiation into womanhood, or anything like that. Maybe some girls react so strongly because they think they're supposed to? Could it be more than hormones at play here? I think all of the tears and emotional reactions seem a bit extreme, but maybe I've just been naive all these years. Cat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatCyndiGirl Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I have to admit that I'm surprised whenever I see these threads, because I had never heard of it being such a big deal or a "special event" for anyone I knew. I had no idea that some moms made it into some sort of celebration or as an initiation into womanhood, or anything like that. Maybe some girls react so strongly because they think they're supposed to? Could it be more than hormones at play here? I think all of the tears and emotional reactions seem a bit extreme, but maybe I've just been naive all these years. Cat I agree. Two years ago, as my gift to to the family, I brought home a stomach virus that was going around work. While my then-two-year-old was at the ER getting Phenergan gel for the up-chucking, my then-11-year-old started. She told me the next morning very matter-of-fact. We had discussed it for YEARS prior, so it was easy for her to take care of things. No crying jags here. And, fwiw, I HATE HATE HATE it when women/girls use their periods as an excuse for their behaviour! :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom4him Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 You all probably all think chiropractics is my answer to everything, but it does help regulate hormones and does wonders towards diminishing period pain. More expensive than drugs, but better for our bodies. Rosie :iagree:I agree totally! about a yr ago my dd started spotting, at 10! The thing was she just kept spotting. About 6 wks of this(I know, way to long)I took her to our Chiropractor/NAET Dr, he treated her and the spotting stopped, just like that and hasn't come back. Now she is at the very beginning of her br@@st beginning to form and today we are going to be looking for something there as she is very self contuse of this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 (edited) No crying jags here. And, fwiw, I HATE HATE HATE it when women/girls use their periods as an excuse for their behaviour! :glare: That's probably because you've (yourself) never experienced it--lucky for you. I wouldn't be so quick to judge those that have horrible mood swings, though-they can't help it. And even the best, most self controled reaction that they can muster at the time might still look like a melt down to you. With some girls the first is the worst--all those hormones have been rising for SO long that the release is just more than they can emotionally handle. We celebrate a little here. We have so few rights of passage-and as Homeschoolers we have even less -So I did some personal stuff for my daughter which I plan on doing with the others. A basket with nail polishes and beauty supplies, pads and pretty stuff, a book, a special meal and some cake. Cause cake (chocolate of course) cures everything. Edited January 17, 2011 by justamouse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Not all women have the same hormonal responses to their monthly cycle - whether it is PMS or during. If you are one of the ones blessed to have no hormonal response or just a minimal one, it is very easy to look down on or think of as hysterical, those of us who have a stronger reaction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmoe Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Want to second (or maybe third) the chiropractor suggestion! I use to suffer from extreme cramping at the beginning of my period. Now I make it a point to be at the chiropractor on the first day of my period. Crampings not gone, but sooooo much better. As for the crying---I don't know. My oldest dd has been moody and crying for 2 1/2 years now. I think its her personality. My two youngest dds recently started their periods and no change for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolly Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I Maybe some girls react so strongly because they think they're supposed to? Could it be more than hormones at play here? I think all of the tears and emotional reactions seem a bit extreme, but maybe I've just been naive all these years. Cat Some? Possibly. Most? probably not. You are just fortunate that you have not had to deal with the extremes of emotions that hormones can rage. Count yourself as fortunate. (And, a bit naive.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WistfulRidge Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I am one of the "lucky" ones. I started when I was 11 - my mom didn't even figure out until my second or third period because I just raided the enormous pad stash in her closet. She found out because I tossed a box of tampons into the cart one day while shopping because I wanted to try them out. My mom didn't get horribly emotional, but still had what I would consider a "average hormonal response", so she expected me to be the same way. It baffled her for years that the only sign of me being on my period was that I'd take it easy the first day (the only day I cramp) and that I tended to gravitate towards ice cream and greasy food (like cheeseburgers, lol). I never had "surprises" because my periods have always been like clockwork (to the point where I can pinpoint within 30 minutes of when it'll start!) I have a sister on the other hand who becomes an emotional mess during her period and my mom is at a loss because I was so easy and my sister didn't start until she was almost 15. My sister gets by with lots of chocolate, hot baths, and phone calls to me. My advice? Chocolate. You can never go wrong with chocolate at a time like this. And maybe try leaving her alone? I know it is probably hard but both my sister and I (with our opposite approaches to our period, lol) really just want to be left alone for the week and not have to deal with anyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
6packofun Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 (edited) She could be crying because of the hormonal changes, she could be crying because it's uncomfortable or gross to her, she could be crying because having your period puts a cramp--pun possibly intended--in your style as a kid. Now it's one more thing to think about and for some girls that might be overwhelming. I'm not a big cryer or overemotional mom, and I've never suffered cramps or PMS to make me feel different other than uncomfortable during my period, but at the beginning of a new phase in her life which might be a little scary or frustrating or fill-in-the-blank, I cut the kid some slack and don't just give a "There's no crying in baseball!!!...even if you have your period!!!" response. My girls don't get to use their periods as an excuse to be a crankpot, but I also don't blow off their feelings. Just saying. Edited January 17, 2011 by 6packofun .m.m Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jewellsmommy Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 I was not really emotional but had severe pain. I was 11 and thought that the level of pain I had was normal and my friends would get mad at me because I could not do normal things during that time. It was debilitating. Thankfully, I was highly irregular and only had a few periods a yr. I was finally diagnosed with endometriosis at 17 and then pcos later. After a laproscopy, I was told I had it pretty bad and that my fertility was going to be limited and I should consider pregnancy asap. My point is that others made me feel like I was being a baby about what all the other women in the world did every month just fine and I just needed to suck it up. I felt really bad about this area of 'womanhood' because of it. I can't stand overly dramatic responses from kids either, but what she is feeling may not be the same as what other girls are feeling. She is probably just adjusting. And, not saying you would do this, but definitely do not take the 'suck it up' route with her. She might be the type that will end up dealing with pms or pmdd in her future. When she gets done with this round, make sure to talk with her about how she was feeling. She may be more rational then. Ask her what she would like from you. She may just want everything normal, like its not happening or she may want extra cuddles. As a side note, when I was young, I would get downright mad when I would start. I knew what was coming and I didn't think it was fair and I hated that males had it so easy. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mama2cntrykids Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 For me, when I was hormonal, I preferred to be alone as much as possible. It was just best for everyone. :) :iagree:--That is *so* me!~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rosie_0801 Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 Really? I am very nervous about her cramping. I had such horrible cramping until I got pregnant with her (my first) That is good to know. Dh loves the chiropractor but I would not have thought of that for this. Yup. My cramps dwindled down to almost nothing after regular checkups. Cramps are usually worse when you are first starting out, so they might not have as good an effect as I've experienced, but you can always talk to your hubby's chiro and see what they have to say. Rosie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngelBee Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 Just try to make this as beautiful of a transition as you can for her. It is an exciting, scary, bewildering time. :grouphug: for you both! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.